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Once Upon A Poet's Dream

Poetry By

Kathrine L. Richards

Once Upon A Poet's Dream First Edition, November 2010 Copyright © 2010 by Kathrine Richards Cover Design by Kathrine Richards Book Design by Kathrine Richards All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the author. The only exception is by a reviewer, who may quote short excerpts in a review.

For Jared and Miss Panda. Jared you are my one true love, always and forever I am yours. Thank you for all you have done for me, and letting me use your laptop. Oh and I'm sorry for breaking it! Manda, you will always be my best friend even if we don't ever talk. I miss and love you lots. xoxoxoxo

Paradise Island
Out of the rainbow Under the sky Through the rain From you and I Between the middle and end With a little luck You'll stay my friend. In the dream About a Paradise Island Above a hidden city Take my hand Among the rest With me, you'll find the paradise Beneath the ocean So close your eyes & After you wake In your thoughts first start

I'll be there And in your heart That's where I'll stay Forever and ever Never going away.

Ode To My Love
Light a smile, words will strike And time will tell, if this is right. A promise to gather in your heart, I'll bury inside of you and leave my mark. I could wait forever if I have to Just to prove I am all for you. When the time comes, I hope you see: The very best I am trying to be. And we will ride this wave 'til it crashes to shore There, we will find gold and glory like never before And as my heart beats perfectly

to your name I sit on this rock and patiently wait The thoughts of us drowns my sorrow I sit and believe there will be a better tomorrow And as the sun goes down, I breathe calmly Knowing...Just knowing... Me You've Got Love For

Half and Half
Half ready, half not. Already in the mood, You've already forgot... I haven't been in the open for so long But I need some time for myself. And I haven't been so strong

And I know I should for that someone else... Half lost, half marked All the reasons to not give up, were shipped away far Now placed inside a tiny closed off maze I strike a match and smile in shock I've set this stage ablaze The answers are now blocked...

Destruction Is So Beautiful
I can't help but wonder what gets her so down She's so beautiful and easy to pick out in a crowd.

Her smile can light up anyone's day She barely wears it though, and I wonder if she's okay. "No!" She says and she holds back tears I can see on her face, all her heartache and fears... I still can't help but to look up to her Oh...Destruction can be so beautiful She's smart too and she deserves the best but what she's given is much too less. Boys should be falling at her feet, Worshiping her and the air she breathes. She's always in her own mind In there I think she's safe...she's just fine. Has anyone talked to her about the world out there? Not many see Destruction so beautiful; not many care... How can someone, so perfect and nice Have so many enemies, it's such a surprise How can someone so innocent, be given nothing but shit?! I see in her the things I wish to be She's barely even here...she doesn't believe her mind is gone somewhere far... She is the Destruction the world has caused...

So beautiful you are....

If I...

If I had one wish, one wish at all It would be to see my friends and family happy. Even if it left me out of the circle. If I had one chance, one chance to make it right I'd pass it up as soon as I get it Cuz when it was right...It felt so wrong... If I had one word, one word to choose to speak It would be love...Just love Cuz I want that for you so badly. If I had to give up one possession, one for the better It would be half of my heart, so I could give it to

yours so it would be whole. If I had to watch a horrible thing, a horrible thing to teach would be you crying Just so you wouldn't feel so alone...So I could be closer to you.

If there was a way, a way to get to you right now I'd take that ticket, kiss

you then leave Only so no one would get hurt.

The Mind in the Center of Confusion
This injury to my heart Puts on a heavy mark Of where I'll be tomorrow Not here, cuz I wanna leave, I gotta go. This crucial haunting on my brain Puts on a heavy stain Of how a liar works his play I just can't fucking stay! This heavy boulder on my soul Puts me to where I'll never know Of a place that is far, yet so close Where I'll be missed the most. This rain falling on my skin

Puts something back within Of how to believe the truth in a lie Don't know how but I'm starting to try...

It's so much better to say hello than goodbye. It's so much safer to quit than to try. What obstacles lie ahead; what pain is in store when all is quiet? Contemplating a way to be, to be the very best of me. Hoping a past subject will arise, and take you over by surprise; where you'll miss me so much and you'll want my touch. But you know you must do, what you think is expected of you... So you sit in your room, waiting for the boom, the boom of a trigger heart, tearing you apart... And I hope you'll miss me so much and you'll need my touch; but you know it's your time, to come to me and say goodbye. Don't you know I scream in my sleep too? Don't you know, I feel just about the same as you? That's why it's so much easier before you say hello, to just

turn around and go; Because I don't want to tell you goodbye. I can't even try. I know I'll miss you so much, I'll yearn for your touch. And I sit in my room, waiting for the doom... The day we say our sweet goodbye, you won't cry and neither will I. I'll smile as before, see you to the door.... Kiss you one last time As we say goodbye.
Love: Katie

Sweet embraces are just around the corner. You take my heart, and store it like a hoarder. Your voice makes me tremble with pleasure in my ears And when you say you love me, it drowns my darkest fears. Your smile is imprinted behind my eyes, I close them and everything is fine. Because you're my inspiration; there is nothing I can't do. My inspiration; yeah that's what I think of you. A tear trickles down my cheek. I swear that I am not weak... My eyes are just dry I promised them I wouldn't cry. I want to say

I love you in some other way I suppose you already know but I have to make sure we grow... Cuz you're my inspiration; what I live for everyday... My inspiration; this feeling must stay...

The warmth of your body Pressed tightly against me I look forward to it every night You are my shining light and My Inspiration.

Forever and A Day
This winding road can never phase us Insecurities will never erase us I finally know where my heart belongs: With you; with all of our blossoming love I finally know what unconditional means and you build my spirits up, my sweet release. With nothing holding me back at all In your arms, I must fall. And my dreams are coming to reality now Everything you do breaks my

frown. And I hope you trust all I say, Because I love you; forever and a day.

No More
No more words or dots that glow in the dark. No more clutter, just boxes filled with ambition to fit in a bag. No more meaningless papers or empty cigarette boxes on the floor. Just perfect emptiness, a girl sitting on the floor with a garbage bag at her feet, c.d's to her right, music playing in the background, and a cigarette in her hand. She can't wait to be free of this place. No more yelling or screaming over nothing. No more

drama, unhappiness, just fun to substitute it all. No more fighting over nothing that was said or lies spilling out of each others lips. Just perfect combinations of the sun and hurricanes. A girl tired of it all, a girl getting ready to leave for her new destination.

When can I be in your loving arms As you hold me up to touch the stars Holding me tight and very close Making it seem, my body froze. When can I kiss your loving lips I'd trace them with my soft fingertips Looking into your eyes as you spill some words,

Knowing that it's only me in your world. When do I get to stare in your eyes Holding me entranced, killing all lies. Knowing it's only me on your mind I am yours, and you are mine. And when do I get to whisper in your ear, All my love, promising to drown your fear Making sweet promises, whispering I love you Knowing and believing...You love me too.


All my life I've dreamed of him Thought of him Wanted him Needed him Yearned for him Yet... I notice as the days grow older

We're not meant for each other We're not ready We're not happy We're not where we belong We're not in love. But if we're not, why...... Why are we still together, why? Are we that scared to be alone, That we'd rather be miserable, I dunno Should we just be friends? This Makes No Se nse....

Misplaced my time, you can't say I didn't try You can't say I didn't do anything when I was doing everything Mistrusted you. You can't tell me what to do. You can't tell me I can't cry, When you've broken me apart inside So tell me now, I'll breathe somehow. Misdirected my place, You can't say what I didn't face You can't say I didn't do my best, when you were always at rest.

Mistreated my mind, you can't say I'm not fine. You can't say I didn't hold your hand when you didn't have a friend. So tell me it's okay, and you break away. Disbelieved in me, You can't say I didn't see. You can't say I didn't help myself, when you can't help yourself. Misfiled my soul, you can't say I didn't know. You can't tell me I'm a fake, when you are nothing great... So tell me wrong from right, I'll put up a fight. Miss fucked up in the head, You'll never guess what I read You can't know what I do, When you can never be true. Miss hallelujah gone wrong, you never had a feeling so strong You've never felt this way in years. When were you last put to tears? So tell me about your life, You can't say I didn't try.

Buy yourself a one way ticket. Tell them all to go play in traffic. Buy yourself a peaceful day Figure out what you should say. And go all out to be happy Just get up and leave.

Buy yourself a New York Taxi Tell them all, “Get away from me!” Buy yourself a new attitude With a top hat and a gun just to suite you. And go all out to look okay Boy you better watch what you say. Buy yourself a happy heart Tell them all to break apart Buy yourself a little while Just to fix that heartless smile And you sit and you wait For the next to call you fake...

Tied up in knots and the battle is not over The battle called: Avernus The drums are pounding on and on There's a loud noise; Screaming fills the air. It's

My heart wanting to break away from your wrath. Avernus isn't over. It’s getting closer while amidst An awkward silence. Covered in holes... Covered in lies... No way to fix this ever! Even if someone was screaming, “SORRY!!!” Avernus won't be over soon. It's going into half-time Going faster than ever! And it causes all your tears...The monster is growling...The ground is shrieking... And still you have blood spill!!! Avernus won't ever stop. Your body becomes oh so Fragile. While your mind falls apart... Your soul wanders off... It's covered in fire.. Covered in your deepest shame...

Hole in the floor, it wasn't there before I fell in and I am slippin'. Curled up in a ball The same place you let me fall. Startled and incapable to re-close

this hole. Belief in the rest, put it to the test. Hope to re-size the stone, the very same one you had thrown To startle me.... and I am unaware, how to care. Feelings drift inside, take them and keep them blind. Infected with your scars bothers me so, I can't help it though... and I keep attached to this infection, startling all complications. So full of decision, No one's given me a reason, To trust this at all, to trust this fall. In my heart I know the truth but my mind doesn't know the use. No idea how to recuperate, no way am I calling this great. Totally uncalled for, this hole in the floor. To startle me soft, you've given this a lot of thought. There's no way around The startling ground. Strangeness in my mind. No way to feel inside.

Prove to be, all you see. All you want to have, all you can stand to give back.. So think again, when you hold a hand The startling in store Like this hole in the floor...

This Angel's Bringing You Home
I wonder why things come better in twos What is, the greater use? I hold my wings under your wound

Hoping I can heal you soon... My feathers brush against your chest As I feel you take a deep breath. How does the air feel in your lungs? Does it circle back, just because? My tears crash through, your blazing fire Noticing, now, your true desire... Fear breaks through and I turn away But then I hear your voice, you painfully say: "Please don't leave me here all alone, "I need you to help me get on home!"

What Does It Mean?

I need to get my mind straight. I look around hoping this isn't my fate. I swear that I see a million times clearer when I close my eyes, And when the shock fades, I fear these times. I stretch my lips and make a smile. Your actions have turned so petty and vile, I turn my cheek but now I stand trial. I hear someone say, "Sh now lady, it's okay to smile."

More About You Than Me
Incredible night, alone to fright

haven't felt so alive, whats missing this time? Confused and fucked in the head, don't wanna fall into bed Heartless war cries....what happened last night? Feeling so careless, and getting an overreaction in this.. natural cause and emotional static crazaction... i know what is good for me and i know how to be happy i know where to go from here, i can tell my conscious is clear all i wanna know is if you can make it....or if you're still feeling like shit...

Because I am Better than You

Your world cannot compete with mine For it is confusing; filled with silly fractions to make you go blind Your eyes cannot see what mine do now For they move swiftly; containing only microchips and chaos pinpointing all about. Your mind cannot keep up with my hamster For it spins smooth and quick; losing yours behind in a race as you search for the answer.

I'll Make My Own Beat
I'll pick and choose Pretend to use Stand up and fight Protect what's right and you can walk away Not listen to what I have to say. But shut up for now One day we'll make it somehow. I'll bend the strands Break your closed hands Leave a message at the door Won't come back for much more. Move on a fast beat Fall in my room to retreat Put it on the open wounds Feel the sting and smell the fumes. I won't be pushed into darkness I won't be the cause of this. I won't let you call me a liar I won't let you make me lick the fire. I won't say you are to blame I won't say you never came. But back off bitch before I blow There are things they still don't know..

Calm & serenity, A kiss just for me Head on a shoulder, no longer a boulder And in my mind; It's alright... Hand in another, nothing is stronger. Peace & happiness, I can't forget that kiss Smiles at each other, Nothing's a bother. And my feelings; I am now believing... Hands touching skin, & it's coming in. Smiles & laughter, I will do after He looks in my eyes, no longer bleeding cries And these sparks in the night, Frightens the Fright Hands caressing breasts, it was done the best.. Closing the curtain, of the scene called 'Uncertain' Now it's just truth & time, nothing will cause a Lie And my hormones are racing, he is the best Thing

Especially with his hands inside me & he is penetrating...

Not Coming Back
Why does everything seem in slow motion? Why did you tell me to drown in the ocean? Burn my pride And take my eyes So you can laugh I'm never coming back Why does it seem the days get longer? Why did you think you were stronger? Burn my love And I give up So you can laugh behind your hand I'm not coming back again. Why does your soul swallow me? Why did you always get angry? Burn my face And I rip this place

So you can be amazed by me when I leave... I'm not coming back

What' s Done Is Done
I can't go back I can't change that I wish away the pain Against the falling rain. I fight away the hate And push open the gate. Signs, they fall all around I can't lift myself off the ground. I try to make you understand I try to hold us in my hand What's done is done, I am full of shame I've forgotten, and I'm to blame. I see what I can't hear. I push away the dreadful fear And I walk against the tide As I'm thrown from side to side. I must move on, but chains hold me here I reach across and try to touch you dear All I can do now is wish I can't seem to let go of this... And I want and I know This feeling doesn't cease to grow My love for you has grown more

But you've already walked out the door Will my heart stop flipping out As my brain shows me doubt. I wish to become so very free But the tide has drowned me...

Tomorrow's A New Day
Hold it in tune, I swear I got you; open these walls Hear their bleeding calls. I fall in this line Just gotta give it time. I beat my drum Sing then hum. I drove this shit and in just a little bit, you'll see I'm on top. Gave it all I got. Tore through the stone, you wanted me home, so I packed back up held my luck All this time, you wanted what's mine. Hold my place, I swear in your face, open this bottle push full throttle. & you weren't right to admit my fright. But I held it deep in the places I keep, locked away,

tomorrow's a new day. Close your eyes, now realize That I'm on top, I gave it all I got. Tore open your letter, felt it all get better. You got your wish, was it better than this? Now be on your way, tomorrow's a new day. Push away. Cry the next day. You froze my feelings, started the killings. I took my time. Put in a little rhyme. I swear my love, I won't give up. Are you confused yet? Just wait a little bit...

Don't worry, I'll leave in a hurry. Forget the tears, wipe away the fears. Don't discourage, we'll treat it like a

miscarriage. We'll start again, fresh as friends. Don't worry I'll be back in a hurry. Well, not right away, because tomorrow's a new day.

On This Floor, My Life Is Wasted.
My life is wasted. I cannot pretend any longer. I can't seem to fight this wave, As it crashes over my soul I am stretched across this floor. Gasping for air. I won't be like her. I won't try to be brave. Because that's all I've done and I'm in a hole I am wasting away on this floor. Your words are nothing

They seem to mellow out the sin But they cause me pain. And all I do is sit, wait, and breathe. I am waiting for you on this floor. My life is wasted. You touch a spot that lives dormant. I cry out to make you stop the rain. When I do the wind carries the sound away

[-{and I am left dying on this floor}-]

Don't Forget
You kinda went solid as he slid those white gloves over your lips. You looked the other way and the consequences hit. Brought out of your daydream of a house filled with laughter and your cigarette is burning at the filter. I hope you brought that love on that stupid string. You pull it softly and you start to scream. Don't forget your trust at the door. Don't forget, you're frozen at the core. Don't bring your hate around here. (Don't bring your hate around here.) You kinda made it far enough to go outside into the world. But you looked the wrong way and went flying to the curb. Stenciling images in your brain that make you feel at home. Your blank expression left over; I think we'll leave you alone. I hope you brought your gun to protect yourself, pull your hair and you're scared to scream out. Don't forget your trust at the door. Don't forget, you can't ask for more. Don't bring your lust around here. (Don't bring your lust around here.) I kinda went limp when I confronted you, I asked myself, “Honey what did you do?” I brought this upon myself, this I know. Watching that cigarette burn that fiery red glow. I hope I brought my love on that stupid fucking string. You can pull it and I'll start to scream.

I forgot my trust at that door. I forgot to knock as I had told myself before. I brought this hatred to you.. Did you bring it back around too?

From Ass Hole to Guilt
Sketched out like a painting by Picasso Perfectly screwed up, yet so great. Reminds me of a time, long ago When our lives weren't at stake. Your face is so perfectly aligned Yet your brain is jagged like a rock.

And you pray for the right time To make your move, just to block. In the blink of an eye, all is betrayed. And your motto is now set to kill And you let me down, I am now decayed. A priceless substitute for what you have at your will. You might come to your senses some day While lying on your death bed, Dying at a very young age. And the guilt is finally in your head.

And with the last breath you take The last words you speak, You break down, you're so pathetically fake...

You Kiss Me... And say... You're sorry.

I am not what I was You breathe steadily but pretend you are having an asthma attack. I laugh at your persistent fake concern. You think you can save me, Yet your words fly away.

They are like the stars at night, Pretty, but don't really have a meaning. You should have listened to my cries and what I needed in the first place. You think you're so great... If you do care Why Do you Ignore the fact That you Tore me Apart....???....

I hope I haunt you in your sleep. I hope you're always thinking of me. I hope you dream of me tonight To where your thoughts won't subside. I hope I kill you in your dreams I hope you never dream of different things. I hope I'm always on your mind To the point you toss and turn at night.

I hope I bring suffering to your heart. I hope you try to tear your mind apart I hope I fill your dreams with fright To where you're scared of the night. I hope I leave you in your dream I hope you begin to miss me. I hope I bring tears to your eyes To frighten you until you scream and cry. I hope I punch you in a dream gone wild I hope you never again smile I hope I make you scream tonight So your voice goes harsh and your eyes go blind. I hope you suffer when I haunt you I hope you go so crazy you hurt yourself too

I hope the pain you brought upon me Burns you... And makes you bleed.

Inside My Mind...Words I Never Knew Existed

Steal away a moment of faith and chew it out of taste. A special dose of laughter, is ceased to be after A moment of madness, breaks the sadness and fears the pain, drives it away Filing faeries in disguise, telling all beautiful lies. A past foretelling, a name is calling A year is slowly passing by, since that dreadful night. Keeping up to date patterns, hiding out in caverns. Alone and used, self abused Awake and feared, downing beer High on time, committing crimes. Going crazy, calling out. Self indulged, stopping now! Help the free flow, go down slow. Let it out fast instead, blood rush to your head. Tears on the ground, dripping sound. Squeaking noise, do I have a choice To bring them closer to me, what am I saying? There's nothing left 'Cept these tears on my breath.

So Deep
So deep inside, I don't know why, There's a face of you, stapled to, a hole that cannot be closed. So deep in thought, and this I bought, a lie or two, just for you, held in my hand, held back as far as it can. Words you spoke, my body

broke. So deep in time, I can't subside, the feeling that you're here, the feeling that you're getting near, my heart sinks down, and my body hits the ground. So deep in me, I refuse to believe, this has happened if it just quickened, and now your here, I am gone in fear; in disbelief there is relief. So deep to get out, I can't move around, I can't get out of this place, and deep inside your face remains, haunting me, so ever cleverly. So deep in dreams, your memory I try to squeeze, out from my brain, you drive me insane, And in my dreams I see you and in my dreams I kill you. So deep inside I don't know why you bother me like you do...

The Sky vs. The Clouds

The sky is like a diamond Always forever While the cloud is like dirty speck A mess you have to clean up. The sky is like an arm Stretching open for all. While a cloud is like a big brother That just gets in the way. The sky is like the ocean The wind being its wave And the cloud is just a vessel That destroys all the prettiness...

Never Be The Same
Those lyrics are confusing

We are already using A pocketful of posies Shoulda told you that I froze these... Now look at what we've done We are not just anyone... Now look at what we've made I will never be the same... I ripped the papers to little bits Thrown them around with all my fits And you're still here and you still care... Now look at what we've done We are better than everyone... Now look at what we've made I'll never forget the day that you came... and told me that you loved me Yeah you told me that you loved me And you held me tight with your voice I would never leave if given the choice... We ride this Ferris Wheel of love I always knew this would become The thing that would make me smile Even if it takes just a while Now tell me that you love me Make this whole world see And I'll tell you that I love you Make this world feel like I do Now look at what we've done This is a new kind of love and look at what we made I will never be the same...

Roller Coaster
I should stop smoking, You look both ways before crossing the street

Hold on while I stop traffic and old open the door for you. Excuse me for a moment While I light this fire with my Finger, and hopefully You will see: How funny this picture is with you Looking all around to make this through I should make this picture better by leaving you out So don't get this past the emotions and don't leave it Behind And make this roller coaster fall A highful doubt and put the pieces together Or at least claim you did but do you mind If I take a second to rethink what You got yourself into and how will you Take it and bring me into it? Why do you run? Will you leave me out of EVERYTHING You did to you? Tell the truth until You're blinded by the Sun.

Petunia Her Words are growing, Each day I am knowing There's no escaping her voice And I don't have a choice. I get scared of someone scaring me,

But it's only her clearly... And I love her with a roses thorn Sometimes I believe, she dreads I was born She loves me in a beautiful dream Where petunia's grow by a clear running stream. And happiness lives not too far away In reality, that is not her game. Fright echoes around my soul I kiss it goodnight, all on my own. I just want her to love me too,

The way that every child receives in bloom. All I ask is why oh why, Does she not care when I cry? They say all this is not true, maybe I'm paranoid. But her actions send out a void... And I love her with a roses thorn Sometimes I believe, she dreads I was born She loves me in a beautiful dream Where petunia's grow by a clear running stream. And happiness lives not too far away In reality, that is not her game.

So I take my own hand, ask to one day understand. Pretend I believe, So I can just breathe. I take my steps, I start to relax... One day I won't have to fight, for what is rightfully mine...
Let the light of day blind my thoughts of you Let the roaring sound of the ocean, drown my love for you Let the music you hear daily, mute your heavenly smile Let the wind just blow away all that was said & kept on file Let the pencil erase everything & all I've sacrificed Let the moon reflect off all the memories & times I cried Let the morning shower was away all the time we spent together

Let this contract sign away when I thought we'd last forever Let the clock tick away the key you hold to my heart Let the seeing eye look away from when we promised to never part Let the spirit haunt away the song we wrote Let the cat claw through the lovely things we spoke. Let the wheel roll over the memory when you first caught my eye Let this book read off...How I'm caught in a bind...

But you're NOT! Cool tempered No longer afraid I know how it is, but I don't Know how you feel No longer healing I see inside Tormented for so long Trying so hard. Moments pass... You are not alone. SO SCREAM! And forget your smile

SCREAM! And forget to breathe......the day you wind up shattered & broken, I'll hold you in my arms. Find out how it goes the hard way Your mind is feeding on it You try To hide Your broken little bones. You know you can't just hold on a little longer. SO SCREAM! And forget your past. SCREAM! And forget to breathe. The day you wind up dead... I'll scream in response for you.

Sweet Breezes
Sweet breezes will conquer our hearts Lift us up and carry us far. We will run with the moon, hoping for new starts. Bodies will embrace like this Lean in close, then grab my

hip. I will pull you closer now, stealing a blissful kiss Words will be said, anger will spark Hearts will clash not letting us part. Leaving bruises that never make a mark. Broken pieces will be swept away Ears hearing a song they sang “Together we will take this day by day.” And only time can tell what will be But we know from that sweet breeze That I love you, and you love me. Yet I'm Here
Crash testing my car tonight

Yet I'm here to save a life And turn what's wrong into right But in my hand there is a knife And she's broken again. Pounding my fists on the wall Yet I'm here to help her not fall And answer to her screaming call But in my mind, there's nothing at all And she's losing again.

Hunting for the stalker in dreams Yet I'm here to make it all go at the seams And make her feel safe outside her screams But in my soul, there's just too many things And I can't make her whole again. Crash tested my car last night I've taken another life. And I've tried to control it with all my might But I was tired of having to strife And she's dying again...

Just Deal With It

Facial expressions that turn cold at the door As she walks in with a bright smile on No one cares for this young maidens heart As they carry to more "important" discussions She is forced to sit in a corner With a light smile still on her face, she watches as a tornado comes through What a sight this is for someone who has never been through a hit like this And among the rest of the destruction, she is lifted into the air Laughing about how fun it should be Crying about no one noticing One turns their head and the others run off Two are still holding hands As the others yell for them to let go or else the tornado will catch them They run away in chorus laughter yelling back for them to all "FUCK OFF" The tornado gets closer and the girl is still whirling around The lovers seek shelter in a cons cabin

He seeks for her hand in marriage The tornado is near the cabin

And the girl is watching it all with despair She closes her eyes and gives up for the night A smile still planted on her face... and she knows She just has to deal with it..

Trips taken to great highs You pass the bowl I pass the joint Keep in mind you can't hold it in for all eternity. So believe and try to organize your thoughts You pass your soul

Leaving You Out Of The Circle

I pass my brain Keep in mind yours isn't in proper use. Fortune fades, an hour goes by How many times are you going to try? Pass the bowl and we can get stoned I pass you by and don't even throw you a glance... Tortured...Broken...You're not reliable And here I am with a smile on my face Mocking your mere existence I pass the bowl, you're no longer in the circle... And here's a newborn, appearing out of nowhere Here lies a road to take You pass the joint and I light you a cigarette You scream with pain, I laugh with intensity. All you have said is nothing but a lie You pass the bowl and let's get high You control the speed I'll control the stops. And all I need now is an answer Where did you go why did you leave? And we pass the weed the bowl the lighter and to forget about it all And I leave you out of the circle

I'm baling, hoping for the past. Not really But I'm choking into depths of you. Wouldn't it be okay, to say, that I'm over it? But when I dream, I'd like to think you'd be there...

Just pop in a movie after Craig, close my eyes and wake up to a blue screen, from a great dream, that I later won't remember... Somehow I want it back but I know...You're happy now... {Just pop into silence} I'm smiling, laughing at mistakes. Not kidding. But I'm joking on the lame. Wouldn't it be okay, if I say, that I'm so over that day? But when I fall asleep, I'd like to wake up to you there. Just pop in a comedy so I'll smile. Close my eyes, wake up to yelling, from a great dream, that I later will be telling. Somehow I want it back but I know...You're happy now... {Just pop into silence} And sometimes I Want to laugh but smiles don't come, when your mother gets silent. I laugh until I feel numb I choke back When I notice you're not around!

(-{We get so silent}-) Somehow I want it back but I know...You're happy now...

{Just pop into silence}

Sometimes, I just let go...

and sometimes I finally move on...

{But we still get silent}

Something Different
It turns and it shakes I learn and it quakes I'm alive not dead and I have not said I'm happy in a while Today's the day I smile. You changed my outlook on life

I cried but now I just might Follow this new beat, Bliss I am going to meet With roses in each hand I am taking a stand I will not back down I will not frown I will not fall I will not stall Cuz I got something new to give I'm 19 and I have yet to live. and I'm climbing to the top I can't and won't stop. Nothing comes easy My breathing might become wheezy but I will not break Lives are at steak No more worries about failing Because from now on, my luck is sailing.

About Beauty
Outside Beauty comes and goes, but your inner strength and personality stays like a tattoo. When one realizes that beauty doesn't mean color or perfection, one can see the

beauty In the laughter they bring, the hearts they build, and the one's they touch. When that is achieved, all else seems a lie But then you feel great and beautiful, even on the outside...

A Bit of Truth
Everyone has ups and downs, but it's not about that. It's about how you wish to go through and get over it.

It's never about fighting, because everyone fights. Yet everyone finds their own way over it and to look past it. When people look high and low, they often miss what's in between, and that's what matters most. If we don't get along or understand one another, enemies form. But why not look past it all and be friends? The world has too many enemies and not enough friends... Just remember, the more we get over, the more we have built, and the higher and closer we get to our goals. It's never easy, but maybe we can just try.

We are fool proof, Bombs blow up around us We hold onto each other tightly Cuz we are all we have to trust. The hope keeps us going Even if all else seems lost They try to tear us apart And for that they'll pay a heavily cost.

In reality we are so far But nothing will keep me from you And one day we will stand face to face On my word I stand true. I picture a hug A kiss or three on the lips I look into your eyes And see only bliss. My arms around your neck We float into the sky We have something better than the rest Not even weed could get us this high. I feel your arms around my waist "Hold me tighter," I'd tell you quietly. We'd be frozen in time And smiling ever so brightly. But or now we have to wait As bombs blow up around us And the others become more jealous. We know, it's only you and me we have to trust.

I Can't See This
I wouldn't expect your acknowledgment towards this unknown fact; To share in me my world with you, so scared yet surprised I'm still intact; I hear your voice and my heart starts pounding with a smile; To believe in some altered force and that you were always worth my while. I try to let go but you keep returning, roses in

each hand; To think I almost obliterated the time I felt so comfortable with a man... I confess I'm no good, that you deserve more than what I can offer; You've heard enough; deep in my heart I know you crave no other. You leave me alone with no goodbye; no footsteps to track which way you went. My depression grows deeper and I try my hardest to make these feelings unbend... and I hold my hand close to the screen, trying not to worry No other man can do what you do to my feelings, not even in a hurry. Your voice rises through and lifts me up inside Strangling hurt and pain as if they are going to die... When you leave they creep back to haunt my dear soul; You come back and their shadows play tricks swiftly dealing a single blow; I cross my arms across my chest holding onto what you say Giving me some support on another heart breaking day Don't get mad at my words from last night, my dear love For I know they are true though my mind is corrupt. I stay on this partial line that sways and beaks apart At the end I hear the beating of my heart It's screaming your name, one syllable after another; Echoing your voice, hoping it's not a blunder... I see your name written on the walls of my hope and love

Lust sees it too and even all the words above... I wonder why you're staying so close to me and all my weakness I try to see it, I'm trying I'm trying...I can't see this...

Locked Away
Couldn't believe what the style was Turn the car around and start a fuss Criss cross your words and play pretend Should have screamed then let go to comprehend I see all that you stood for but what was it good for? Should have gotten high and tossed the bowl Corrupted your mask, give it a good throw. I would've laughed to myself seeing you try; Silence stricken, torturing your mind. I wonder if you got that call from that lady You turn to me and call me crazy Figuring you out is like a maze Turning in your seat, you're locked in my cage; I ate the key, I'm sorry fucker. You stroke the dial and try to block her. I trust you won't forget this time I got my friend, it's a '45. You're not gonna get the best of me, remember I got you locked away...

If It's True
The tears keep coming as I think of your face. The way I'm being is such a disgrace. I know I shouldn't be crying, Because no one is lying. Your voice covers me whole, surrounding my soul. I love the sounds of your body, I want you completely. Oh...the way you speak, makes it so hard to breathe. I get so paranoid there won't even be a you and me...But the more I

think about it, the more I hear we will be... If it's true brush my tears away If it's true let me live today If it's true let me know If it's true don't you dare let me go...
Muscle Relaxer
Eyes twitch. It burns to see this sight. Your hand runs through your hair.. And you pretend not to care... Ears swell.

It is too loud in this room. You run to the staircase but you can’t go up. You must face what you can’t trust. Muscles tense. A fist to the wall. Holes form one by one... And you reach for the gun...

Never Enough
Time circles around my head I wonder if by morning, will I be dead? I keep my head up until my neck aches I keep my distance until something breaks. I can't help but wonder what is wrong with me With his laugh in my ear I just wanna scream.

Only time can tell if it will stay this rough But it always seems, I am never enough. I fight with all my power to be alright I fight I fuckin' fight. Without a pat on the back here I go through this alone Battling my demons that leak through his phone. Without a second to waste It's time I make haste But only time can tell if I have been bluffed No matter what I do, it's never enough..

Unknown Sightings of What Would’ve Been If Not For He.
Staring at these headlights as a cracking noise comes over me

I look through my closed eyes and pretend to breathe. Staring down those people running after my fallen frame I look at the scene from high above and I hear a bang. His hand fell through me His eyes were calling And I fell to the ground once more Shaking as the car honked it's horn. Staring down an hour glass, freezing in the rain I look as a wire falls, I scream in pain Staring at hopeless feet getting hurt I look and someone had to blurt. That his hands fell through me And his eyes were calling. I jumped out to the side Shaking and wet, he saved my life.

Silver Lining
I pretend to step aside, and ignore the words you say bout me. I pretend to fly, and ignore the ground touching my feet.

I surrender my thought, of a hopeless girl. I hope you fought, when lost was the word. I was promised a swollen lip, but got a broken heart. I trigger a flip kick, but fell apart. I saw you cry, and placed my hand on your shoulder. I swear I tried, and it all got colder. Now I sit contemplating if I should go back. Wondering if I need to stay me, and how you'd react. So I sit and wait. Maybe the answer will come to me. Hi! My name is Kate. Forget it... stupid silver lining

While smiles fade and turn to nothing You hold deep inside something That I had been looking for and with one kick it was out the door... Meanwhile I go back in time

When nothing was ever mine Oh how stupid I once was And this is who I am. This is all for us. As your smile fades into a stone Know that you are never alone And even though we do not speak Deep in my heart you I will keep. Down my face a tear runs for you More come before the day is through And though I hold my Head up high I want to let go and not try. And as I hear your voice come through my speakers I wonder if they actually hit my ears The sound is so beautiful As the band plays on I am so grateful And I know this one simple fact Watch as the curtain fades to black Because the blackness is only waiting for the light That you have to try so hard to find And watch when it fades there is something you wont see Happiness waiting for you to be There is always at least one thing right You just have to search and find.... Never forget that I love you so Never ending forever it will grow And know this one secret I will share Where you find happiness...I will be there...

So That's What It's Like To Smile
Kudos to you

Thrusting your way through Turning it all blind Being all kind I trust the system But they couldn't get 'em I saw the looks And I read the books Someone once told me For me to see I have to believe I need to retrieve What was stolen from me Innocents and being happy. But you say hello Making the pain go You smile my way Then everything's okay. I promise my dear I'll drown your fear And I'll keep saying hello, Never goodbye, For I won't go And I'll smile your way In hopes I made your day.

Blink. You wait for anything to happen.

Why would I believe, that you won't screw it up this time? Think. You've been here before me; You question. LIE! I could breathe, and you decided to screw it up this time. (I could catch you, but you can't catch this) Now. You perfect in all of your skills. Blending and You cover up your past I can see you failing AGAIN! How is this about love? My thrills, sending...A Perfect shock too fast. I can you falling my friend! Control. Aspirin. Overdose. I could resurrect you but you don't want that. Harsh. Words. Thrown. I could take it back but you won't understand.

Overdose again and choke on your spit!

How much satisfaction is guaranteed Built together with a twelve digit calling number and a string of cheese. Seeing the gold turn into liquid and the smoke turn into spiders Watching the cigarettes burn into the darkness While everyone's asleep killing their sugar plums. How much happiness will you sacrifice? Strung apart with a monkey in the middle and we roll the dice. Seeing the eyes turn into clouds and the faces look like elves. Watching as the clock grows into the night Facing the digits grouping of twelve. And you wait And you notice

And you see And you know this Ain't right But you laugh Yeah you laugh

And you laugh You laugh... I called you to say... FUCK YOU

Something Else
Your eyes meet with the desire of the endless burn of the justification of the intensity you yearn. For the love of defeat of the reasons you're here all that has been said hasn't been left clear. You thrust and push and decrease your smile and all you've known has left for awhile and the Devil comes out to play taking over the words you say. As you open your eyes to a full extent there is nothing here to keep you content You thrash kick and scream but nothing here is sure to deem. All you know is Satan is here No longer scared, but feeling sincere. And curled up in the smallest ball You feel yourself hit the wall. Dead end My friend. Who will show you that you care And here's the Hell that's always been there. And instead of hating it you take it for what it's worth. Make the best of every little word. And crouched into the darkness You are reading this The words of the Devil

Calling you forth...

Drown In Your Beer.
Cigarette smoke all around me Caressing subjects of a heart that's falling Hold my breath and break down a wall A baby's laugh breaks the fall. The smell of incense fill the room Innocent smiles of how to get back at you. Raise my fists and form a hole Making it hard for you to swallow. A candle's flame trying to reach the ceiling A knife near a wrist to shake this feeling I hope, I pray, to whoever will hear, To see you in pain; to see you drown in your beer.

Beg What You Wanted
Beg my life, I'm alright In the end This hole will mend And bend my life To see inside All you'll see is darkness Is this what you wanted? Beg my heart I will start Bringing in The whole damn feelin' And bend my heart To hear a thought You won't believe it Is this what you wanted...What you wanted?! Hate my life I'm just fine In the past I knew it wouldn't last. And trade my life For one alike All you get Is that what you wanted?!

Hate my heart I will depart Bringing out All helpless doubt! And trade my heart Place a mark On all you forget Is that what you wanted? Hate my soul We will follow What we knew What happened to you? Just trade my soul Create to destruct all you know and all it killed... Is that what you fucking wanted?!

Uneven piercings. Smiles flown left and right. Laughing with happiness on the mind, but pain on the soul. Nothing to show for. No reason to care...Except a face that lingers in the walls of an empty space. Crowded behind a broken down faith; he says hope is just nothingness. He stares with those piercing eyes....she knows there's nothing here to gain, nothing here to lose. Realization of the past and the present, longing to feel for...No more feeling for...and the cries are loud...longing to feel for...No more to feel for...lost in the abyss of rage long to see something more, nothing to see now...Corruption and the aftermath

watching destruction at it's best. she says there's no more to hope for, nothing to show for... Longing to feel {SOMETHING} for this... won't happen... so hold onto the switch of 'life or death' and justify your actions and dream on... Dream on and forget cry touch scream feel the nothing caving in long to feel still nothing all that's left is a confused mind and nothingness she says I will be there she hugs... Not knowing what to expect... give it up... he thinks nothing that she feels...

Or Maybe...

Untitled 2
Test these waters for safety If the boat floats, then just maybe Life will be easy like in the old days When we were children and could seek through a maze The table turns to a plate broken in two It tells a lie buried beneath the truth Twisted images fly at us all at once, you know In this day and age we've no where to go Mark these walls of notice of your existence

If they seek to know, they'll promise this: “One day you will make it happily my friend I'll give light and strength until the end...”

You smile that heartless smile and then you flash those eyes...with those confusing heartache similes and you forget that you mean so much to a [million] heartache faces...and then you go around {KILLING}

all the weirdness that surrounds you just to watch a [million] heartaches bleeding and because you think you're better than the {Heartless} of the {Heartlessness} and you decide to become "one-of-a-kind" and watch as everyone's hearts break You find a way to breathe in the heartaches and you find that

nothing is worth fighting for.... and you decide.... to keep the broken heart next to you... {For All to See}

I Am
...Only human, I dress myself for the part I spread my wings so I can fly, but they will get ripped apart. ...Trying to hold on, but sometimes I can't find where I should hold So I let myself fall a little ways down, while I watch my life unfold. ...Laughing on the outside, but filled with tears within These curtains I wear to protect myself, is only leading to a sin. ...Holding my head up high, and trying to find my wings But the binds that hold me only go so far, I can't even hear what an angel sings.

...Throwing a curve ball, and watching it soar through the air when it crashes through that window, I know I won't be bothered to care. ...Not fooling myself, hiding from you all has caused a great depression But you only hear laughter, and it's now time for the next session... ...Still trying to find those wings, a bird flutters by and i break down inside And his name rises through my brain, and I know soon I will find... ...Carrying on, though the fog seems to get heavier and it begins to snow, I lose my balance, there here is, with a light showing me where to go.

Remember and Don't Forget
Remember when our eyes first gazed upon one another. Remember the days spent with each other. Don't forget what we had though it wasn't long, and the words we spoke; a bond so strong.... Remember how our bodies entwined completely, remember how your hands used to touch me. Don't forget what went on with us, the way we kissed it was so obvious. Remember all of our laughs jokes and kisses. Remember the way you held me in the kitchen. Don't forget the day we met and the fire, the way we couldn't help but smile.... Remember all the things we did, please; cuz that's all we are soon to be...just memories.

Remember the time the moments, everything, never forget about me.... Remember how our lives changed when we got together , remember the van the talks, and the feeling better. Don't forget how you held me up and saved me, how you held me up and changed me.... Remember this fact that you're the best thing, remember even if we do just seep into a memory. Don't forget the fact that you've made me see the impossible, the fact that you know how to make me so comfortable.... and remember that I'll be here when you need me...Remember...I'll always be here..

Your Emptiness
You didn't come that night I said please. You fell to the floor amidst the strangeness that Stranded you and told them all you were okay... How can you make up such lies


and expect them all to care? How do you feel when throws her arms open to

the other

guys like the way she did that day? You never told me the way we were supposed to live. And you never said you cared; you only pulled away You fell to my feet and begged me not to leave... Said you couldn't breathe... And all I wanna feel All I wanna know Is that you'll make it And you'll be okay...

It Ain't Jealousy
Hate creeps in as I see that face I just wanna slap her and put her in her place. What right did she have moving in on

my groove I laugh cuz in the end she's the one to lose. My heart races as I try to hold my tongue What she did was a bitch move she's in the wrong. What right did she have Stabbing me in the back? Right now let me get this straight It ain't jealousy it's all hate. Pain settles in as I think about what happened. She's mighty stupid and nothing but a kid. Boys are more important to her than any of her friends. What right does she have making silly amends? I try and try to hold my feelings back I don't wanna hurt her like that But who gave her the fucking right To take what was once mine? I'ma tell you it ain't jealousy or hate I hold no feelings for her she is nothing


Friends Do Make Someone Better
Making my way to the top. My momentum is non-stop. My mind is always racing, to the good times I am always embracing. I'm the one you'll never forget. Laughs and fun you wont ever regret. I'm the one you'll always yearn for. I feel your thoughts, You're begging for more. And her face creeps in the dark, my dreams are filled with her mark. My dream girl makes my heart beat fast, shes been there for me since months gone past. And this woman stands next to her, they are equal Manda and Esther. Manda grabs my hand and protects me, softly spoken are the words she's telling. They go the extra mile

to make sure I truly smile. They both are my Angels in disguise... Always healing my broken eyes.

To My Bestie
I fear your world is crumbling down But let your world crash around me, I am your ground. My heart beats out to you I pray you'll make this through I hope you keep your head up This is not bad luck I pray you only weep If the memory's are too hard to keep. I try to hold you close to me But each time you move away It hurts but I love you so I pray your pain will forever go... You haven't spoken to me in days I wonder if you're going through a different phase I want to help you my dear I sit here in fear... Your beautiful face locks in my head I find it hard to lay in bed

I seek answers but nothing's found And I am left in this fear and doubt Just remember, my dear friend, When you must, please grab my hand I'll hold you tight and protect you Until you see this through...

The War
Holding my hands down at my side, holding them tight enough so they don't move and I stare straight ahead with my eyes wide open and my mouth closed. No smile passes over my face. I just march on with the rest of the people at my side. No I don't know them, nor them I. We talk when we are giving orders. Other than that... We're not allowed to speak. Holding my head up in perfect posture to where it's stuck like this at night when I sleep. And I never look at my feet as I march on. My neck hurts from this way of life. I blink every 5 minutes and no one is talking... You just hear feet pounding... Then we are called to a halt...and all is silent... All is silent. We can't give away our position, so we creep around slowly. A gunshot is heard. A piercing cry. No one moves as he falls towards the ground. No one blinks as

his knees hit hard on the sand, and when his head hit the ground it cracked open...And no one said a thing. Hope filled us with rage, rage filled us up with death. We no longer know what we were still doing here. The war was over... And it was no ordinary war. It made us forget who we were. Our families at home don't know if we're safe...They just sit and stare. They cry and scream...

Low Down
Move your hand up and down. Put some words together so they make sense. Stare with a blank expression, while your mind tries

to remember it. Look around your dark room, everything seems so far away. Everything is so... Why does it feel so different today? A smile used to light across your face Something doesn't feel right...Think... Just think... What about how you felt Last night? And you want to cry, for no Reason at all, but you won't let the Tears fall. Hold your head up, like nothing bothers you. Keep in mind, though, some can see right through... And when they ask you, “What's wrong?” what will you say? When they look in your eyes and bring out the tears, will you just walk away? Why does it feel so different? It used to feel safer than this. Bring together kindred, you know, the ones who are just like you. The ones you never knew. And you can all mope together in each others

arms, so close. Then make them feel sorry for you, because of the road you chose.

Longing and Loving
I love to hear your voice, massage against my ear Making all the scorching fire, seem to disappear.

I long to feel your arms, wrap around me tight. Warming up my heart, and making sure I'm alright. And the frogs that dance on lily pads Think that they know bliss But apparently they don't Cuz they've never ever felt this. I long to see your eyes close, and sleep so close to you Wondering if I'm in your dreams, before the morning dew. I love to see your smile, flash before my eyes Because of what I do for you and what we do at night... And the sun that blazes down

on us, Might make some people happy But nothing can compare To what you do to me I long to kiss those lips, before a bedtime story This is my happily after, this is me high on your glory...

Untitled 3
Outsmarting the others. A lover-less mind. In the heart that always bothers, you will never be mine. A hole to fill, a place that will never be alive; in the midst of all that is real, I'm always out of my mind. On top of a quiet notion, a young boy screams out; he's falling into the ocean, where the girl of his dreams had fallen about. Waking up to a dream, to see you're waking to another one, everything is tearing at the seam and nothing is ever fun. As the heart starts to see, and you start to scream, and I start to bleed; make me a promise: You won't forget me. And the confusement settles in, and we don't know what's going on, and everything is going wrong within...We shall go on strong...

Untitled 4
Hold up and kiss these lips That keep your finger-tips Coming closer to the edge Near the terrible wreckage And I haven't found A place around The scary mind It's touching me this time... Clear the airways Solute to the freak waves Say hello to a new goodbye Tonight's the night we ride And now you're calling my name But it's just not the same As before that night Before it wasn't right... Cuddle close To the mind you miss most And don't forget your manners You must live up to her standards And now everything we had is passing by And you tried and tried and tried You kissed me good night And promised it would be just fine...

Untitled 5

Crouched into darkness You never wanted this You never wanted to be What you saw in me. You changed into my power And within the same hour You destroyed all you looked at There's no turning back But you did turn your back on the stress you caused And turned down everyone you've ever loved. You never wanted to hate I guess you did it anyway You never wanted to be what I was back then You changed...did you quit believin'? Did you bite your tongue And did you give up on your fun? Crowd over your eyes To take us all by surprise. You take over the world With one little word. And here you are destroying it all Not answering to their call You never wanted to see What everyone else believed

A smack to your face Should put you in your place.

As Long
As long as I keep my head up and keep trying As long as I keep positive and stop thinking I'm dying As long as I keep making them happy As long as I keep them all laughing As long as I keep my voice loud and strong As long as I keep my distance from the wrong As long as I keep this smile on my face As long as I keep holding my place As long as I keep them satisfied As long as I keep up with the time As long as I keep on hoping As long as I keep on wishing As long as I keep yelling your name As long as I keep hiding my shame As long as I keep believing As long as I keep breathing As long as I keep by their side

As long as I keep my mind As long as I keep my illness locked away As long as I keep us all okay As long as I keep up with this fight Everything will be alright.

The Game

You're so deep in your thoughts Kept hidden in the time of the game. And no one cares for what you say So why don't you just keep your mouth shut? You're so sure of yourself now Kept a secret for far too long And everyone cares that you are wrong So why don't you just drop out? You told everyone a stupid lie Kept hoping no one would ever get mad at you And you acted like you had no clue

Now count all the people you made cry You had us all hanging on a string Kept your distance, but made us follow And everyone didn't want to go But you made us, even though we were suffering. You kissed my cheek and made me blush Kept up this charade until you knew how I felt And no one knew how bad you made me melt You knew though, and killed me with one touch. Your ways are tearing me down Kept thinking you were different but this is the game And you said you were sorry then took the blame But I know... I've won now.

The Beauty of Ugliness
I look in the back of my mind, and there letters that stare me in the face. They tell me of a beauty so powerful, Thanking me for opening up my mind. And while your words still linger in my ears I think of all the ugliness I have encountered And I realize all that

is, is a different Form of beauty. It's not ugly, fake, or solid or dead. world was created It's not strange, broken, It's the way this

to be It's the way the wind was supposed to blow And I love the way this set up is. And I am thankful for all that I have laid eyes upon. I feel myself growing up and starting anew I feel your eyes and I feel your smile. And I am thankful you are apart of my life Cuz you hold my hand when everyone won't. You let me cry, though you hate it And you've always been there for me...

I see the beauty in every ugliness. situation. I see the best in this Don't give up And k,now I love


A Piece of Advice

Inside your mind lies your own image of yourself. It starts the most precious of things, but as you listen to each spiteful word, each stupid sentence, each hurtful paragraph, that image begins to

deteriorate. Soon, you have to learn to not listen to anything anyone else says. Life, is about living, not being torn down by misleading information Don't be brought down by careless thoughts. You ARE NOT what anyone says, except yourself. Yeah people talk you down, they point and laugh, they stare with their mouths open... Only proving, all there is is you. And that's all you need.

Untitled 6
Your eyes sparkle in the light and they see right through me. A promise is only in words. Actions aren't as strong as belief.

If you could find the right reasons to rummage through the truth of light. And if you could tell me the answers to why it wasn't right. If you could create a reaction if you could change time. Haven't you done something you regret, even if they thought it was fine? If you could find one life that was perfect; I would go and change it...

Hot and Cold
I'll straggle around in circles as I find my escape plan. Throw away the bottle then grab another; cigarette in hand. Stroke my buttons 'til liquids form a mist. Hold you to it believe I'd do it if only for bliss... Move the answers to form an equation complicating your pride. Trust my force I'll fucking do it, and take over

your mind. They've seen it happen as I throw this bottle at the fires I see. You were never there and I don't care if you bleed. It always seems great at the time 'til it's done. Push away I lost my patience, we're not having fun. Deadliness redirected me away from here. Your sounds form they are torn and disappear. Not paying attention to the beat about. Concentration moved its stupid ass to a place down south. I promised to make you crave more than you could think. But honestly I hate you, and I still don't care if you bleed. And all that belongs goes crashing down and burns you at the stake. Afraid to fight. Afraid to love. You choose death over power. You choose hot over cold.

Pictures of an Angel
I hold a hand, and quietly let go. The last breath was forsaken My last hope was forgotten I've arranged a little get together Between love and death What's first? I forget... I think I once saw: Canyons yelling at each other Buildings telling secrets of falling. Hearts laughing at the aftermath And a baby girl already talking as if She was 29. The words were not from speech The words were not from sign language The words were from her eyes The pictures I saw were beautiful She is not a baby girl

She's my angel...

The Sweet
The cool breeze of summer passing The sweet call of everlasting It could have been worse But we should have buried this curse Of a drama filled relationship How did they know we would turn to shit? The clouds blocking the sun The sweet smell of what was done It could have been hate But we should have burned this place Where we spent our woeing and crying How did they know we were dying? The heat burns the trees

The sweet sound of disbelief It could have been better But we should have watched us together How we stood then fell How the fuck did they know we'd be in this hell? The sky turns to black The sweet feeling we took background It could have just been rage But we should have broken down this cage Where we stayed trapped for so long And they knew us together was so wrong...

Held up on her own Never was such a beautiful home Here to crack apart and break To drain it all out in the sink. Holding out her arms Sounding out alarms The death of a loved one Everyone's crying, she's too young. Held a rose in hand The thorns do what damage they can The rose withered and fell apart The sign of another broken heart Holding what she could It was raining blood

The mother drank from the well And the father grew ill Held on too tightly Shouldn't have been taken too lightly The money bought the happiness But it caused the greediness Holding a baby now She wants to escape somehow...

It was stolen from me Innocence and being happy I shoulda seen it coming If only I wasn't so loving... It was stolen away Not going back to that day Your strength overpowered my heart If only I could break you apart... You have stolen the last! Don't move too fast Because Baby I will trip you into a black hole If only that was the final blow... I've stolen the words from my book Now if you don't mind, take a look

At the pain on this piece of paper If only we could turn to something happier... It was stolen not too long ago I'm gonna give it all back though It is found not worthy of this place If I only could just punch you in the face...

I wake up, it's like 4:30 in the A.M. My mind's so gone can't decipher where I been. These past few weeks been a bit hazy man I hope I didn't do anything crazy. I'm stuck feelin like a schizo in this place, hold my head up high I've been thrown from grace, and my body's aching I feel like I'm breakin, and I wonder what you're up to, do you feel the way that I do? I read you wasn't doin so well, but you never call so it's hard to tell, and now I can't break away from a past sin, that's left me with the biggest grin. I pull a

pillow to my chest, Feelin anything but blessed. See held in this mind of mine, are secrets and pain kept from over time. Are you feelin the way that I am? Hope not, see you must understand, I don't do drugs but I feel so lost, and I can't break free, don't know whats gotten into me. I fake a smile and pretend it's alright, then your face creeps into my mind. No hope left in this hopeless struggling life, lost it all I guess it was the same night, I woke up took a drive to see my sister in tears, and I guess that's why we been distant all these years. But that angel is gone now to a better somewhere, the stars shine brighter on that time of year. but that's a different story for another occasion, but since then I've lost most passion. Carrying onto a different subject, I got an idea and I hope you don't object, I plan to make you feel my agony, this kinda pain gets me down on one knee. You left me stranded and used, I've caused self-abuse, and it's nothing new, but I thought that you, would at least still be a friend, and I forget you're only a man. And again that's for a different day, but right now all I'm tryna say, is: Are you feelin the way that I am? Hope not, see you must understand, I don't do drugs but I feel so lost, and I can't break free, don't know

whats gotten into me. I fake a smile and pretend it's alright, then your face creeps into my mind. Backdrop the high times, Lose when the wind dries, but I don't know what I'm saying, Just moving my hands and this what's playin. Race around the parking lot with stolen meat, and you promise me you got a tasty treat. I run into the wall of exception, hope there is time for redemption, You lose what you stole with a gain for a hole, and I'm not here anymore it's all just a blur. Thinkin of seein a doctor soon, hope his pad of paper has lots of room, for this crazy shit thats in my storage space, close my eyes I'm bein taken to a different place...Don't forget me I scream into the Mic, and I'm not done I'm giving all my might. I noticed where you're standin' is where I should be, but right now I can't move my body, I'm being held back by a different source of reason, get back here you ain't done pleasin', now I move back to the chorus don't worry I'll forget us...

My body feels like: My mind is like: I'm hoping like:

See I'm Only like: it...

About the Author:
Kathrine was born June 19, 1991 in Rochester, NY She now resides in . Menifee, CA with her boyfriend. She loves to read and write. She also likes to help others in her spare time. She loves working around children. For more about this author please email her directly at where she will talk to you about anything you want to talk to her about.

The End

The End Good or bad Coming , and seeming Too soon...

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