What Wikipedia Has To Say About the Nairaba Tribe of Nigeria

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By Ahmed Olayinka Sule, CFA suleaos@gmail.com
19 January 2011

** The entries are fictitious entries

 

 

 

Prologue
While thinking about Nigeria a couple of days ago, I came to the realisation that there exists a tribe, which has not yet been identified by historians, sociologists and anthropologists. The tribe in question is the Nairaba tribe. The Nairaba tribe has played an important role in Nigeria over the last fifty years. When I had nothing doing, I decided to search the Internet to find out more about this tribe. My first port of call was Google.com, unfortunately, the search engine had no answer and returned my search request with the question “did you mean Nairobi?” I therefore decided to go to bed. As I slept, I dreamt that I opened up the Wikipedia** website and when I woke up, I decided to write down what I dreamt about. Ahmed Olayinka Sule, CFA January 2011

** The entries are fictitious entries

 

 

 

Nairaba Tribe of Nigeria

edited by Ahmed Olayinka Sule, CFA

Not from Wikipedia, the free encyclopaedia Jump to: navigation, search Nairaba may refer to: • Nairaba people, a Nigerian ethnic group o History of the Nairaba people, the history of the Nairaba kingdoms o Nairaba name, name of a Nairaba person o Nairaba culture, culture of the Nairaba nation o Nairanese, the language spoken by the Nairaba people o Nairanity, the traditional religion of the Nairaba people The Nairaba tribe are one of the most influential ethnic groups in Nigeria. The majority of the Nairaba’s speak the Nairanese language. The Nairaba tribe constitute between 500,000 and 750,00 individuals [citation needed] and are found predominantly all over Nigeria. While the majority of the Nairaba’s live in Nigeria, there are also substantial indigenous Nairaba communities in the United Kingdom, United States, Ghana and South Africa. The Nairaba tribe is the richest of the 250 tribes that exist in Nigeria [citation needed].

Contents
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1 History 2 Traits 3 Philosophy o 3.1 Classism o 3.2 Oppression o 3.3 Materialism 4 Genetic connections 5 Political Ideology 6 Religion and beliefs o 6.1 Nairanity 7 Language o 7.1 Vocabulary 8 Demographics o 8.1 Age o 8.2 Gender 9 Prominent Nairaba’s 10 See Also 11 Bibliography 12 References 13 External Links

 

 

 

History
The root of all the Nairaba people can be traced to Nigeria. Most of the ancestors of the Nairaba people came from the various tribes of Nigeria including but not limited to the Yoruba, Igbo, and Hausa, Ijaw tribes. A couple of decades ago when Nigeria discovered oil, wealth increased in the land. This new found wealth resulted in the craze for money [this may be disputed]. From this time on, a number of people left their tribes to form a new tribe, which they named Nairaba after the Nigerian currency called Naira.

Traits
The Nairaba people share a lot in common. The overriding characteristic of the Nairaba’s is the love of money. A number of them have benefited from the rape of Nigeria over the last fifty years. Some sociologists have erroneously classified all wealthy Nigerians as members of the Nairaba tribe; however, their argument is flawed as they assume that wealth is bad. What they fail to analyse is the love of money. While Nairaba’s might be wealthy in terms of money and other material possessions, intellectually they are very poor. They often suffer from poverty of the mind as they frame their lives solely in monetary and materialistic terms. What keeps them motivated and happy is the increasing value of their bank accounts. For members of this tribe, money is seen as an ends rather than a means to an end. Consequently, for the Nairaba’s the end justifies the means and they will do anything to get rich even at the expense of their reputation, family and soul. Another trait prevalent among the Nairaba people is a high level of selfishness. They only think of themselves. If one conducts a word count on a typical conversation of a Nairabian, one will notice the prevalence of the words “ I”, “Me” and “Myself”. For them the word “I” should always be used instead of “Thou” Majority of the Nairaba’s suffer from low self-esteem; as a result they gain their validation by the cars they drive, the clothes they wear, the ‘big boys and girls’ they hang out with and the houses they live in. Statistical evidence shows that 100% of Nairaba’s suffer from a condition known as Pica, which is a medical disorder characterized by a craving for non-nutritive substances. Unlike majority of pica sufferers who usually eat paper, batteries, knives etc, the Nairaba’s physically eat money to satisfy their cravings
[citation needed].

Philosophy
The Nairaba’s are driven by three main philosophies namely oppression, classism and materialism. What gives the Nairaba’s joy is when they enjoy the good things of life, while others around them experience abject poverty. For instance, a Nairaba derives joy when he leaves his ₦200million home and enters his ₦40million car and cruises along the Lagos road and sees his neighbours living in shantytowns and riding okada’s [citation needed] .

 

 

 

The Nairaba’s are also known to be very materialistic. Sources say that some of them are reported to have acquired certain luxuries such as private jets and adorn ₦300,000(£1,230) Brazilian hair extensions even when there is no pressing need for it (all in the name of keeping up with the joneses) citation needed]. The Nairaba people are also strong advocates of classism, as they believe that due to their wealth and influence, they are superior to other Nigerians. They forget that everyone is created in God’s image and all men and women are equal.

Genetic
Nairaba-specific greedytype h49 (Greedygroup G), occur at 100% in the population of the Nairaba people [citation needed]. The dominant gene present in the Nairaba people is the ₦ gene. This gene is found in 99.9% of the Nairaba population. Other genes such as the £, $, € and ¥ [this may be disputed] was found in the range from 20% to a maximum 40% of the Nairaba people. [5]

Political Ideology
The Nairaba’s don’t have any political ideology as the tribe comprises of individuals from the left, right and center of the political spectrum. The only political ideology they seem to accept is Nairaism. They often jump from one political party to another as long as it increases their chances of making money. A number of them have been referred to as political prostitutes.

Religion and beliefs
Most Nairaba people state their beliefs to be Nairanity. Their god is Naira ( the Nigerian currency) who they worship with all their heart and all their might and all their strength. Nevertheless, many Nairaba’s retain their Christian and Islamic belief system in parallel with their Nairanity. In recent years, a number of Nairaba’s have left the Nairanity faith and opted to worship the Euro, Dollar and Pounds Sterling [citation needed]. A common prayer made by the Nairaba people is the Naira Prayer, which goes as thus: The Naira is my shepherd, I shall not want It makes me to be happy and leads me to sleep in my houses in Dubai, London and New York It restores my bank account, dignity and connections. It guides me in the path of selfishness, vanity and ignorance. Though I walk through the valley of EFCC and the court I will not fear for thou art with me I shall dwell in the house of Naira forever and ever. Amen

 

 

 

Language
The official language of the Nairaba’s is Nairanese. Nairanese is an English-based language with monetary influences. Most Nairaba’s don’t understand any other language apart from Nairanese. To engage them in communication, one has to discuss either money or opportunities to make money; otherwise they lose interest. Vocabulary: Here are some examples of the Nairanese dialect: What is in it for me? There is money to be made in Nigeria; I would not talk to Rafiu because he is poor and not well connected; I have just stolen transferred ₦190billion of my depositor’s funds to my private bank account; I have just bought all the houses on a street in Johannesburg and Dubai

Demographics
The Nairaba’s account for 0.5% of the total population of Nigeria [evidence required]. Membership of this tribe cuts across a wide range of the Nigerian society including some sections of the military, a number of politicians, students that want to get rich by any means necessary, some employees of financial and non-financial institutions, lecturers etc [this may be disputed]. The age range of the Naira tribe is from 20 years to infinity. The tribe comprises of an equal number of male and female [citation needed].

Prominent Nairaba’s
• Chief Bello Adebayo Abdul • Otunba Yusuff Emeka • Rtd. Major General Kalejaiye Abrahams • Deaconess Sarah Ibrahim • Alhaji James Olufumilayo

External links
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Nairabasociety.ng.org promotes the cultural, social, economic and political welfare of the Nairaba’s. Nairanese.nr.org (Words of the Nairaba Language) promotes the digital presentation of Nairaba orthography through the creation and modification of Opensource software.

 

 

 

See also
• Poverty of the mind • Mark 8 verse 36 • Nairanese • Foolishness • Selfishness • Nairanese language • Classism • Oppression • Materialism • Pica (disorder)

References
1 ^ foolishness.com [not in citation given] 2 ^ me-myself-and-I.com 3 ^ Nairabapeople.ng.org 4 ^ 1 Timothy 6:10 5 ^ Adeniji I.Yejide. et. al., "Genetic diversity of the Nairaba People of Nigeria"// Monetary Genetics,

Bibliography
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Musa, Adewole Chika: Selfishness: A Nigerian Primer, Kaduna, 2010 Jadesola, Sarah: Rich Getting Richer and Poor Getting Poorer, Ijebu Ode 1969. Abdul, Ken: History of the Nairaba’s, Lagos 1980. Ode, Didirin: Idiotic Philosophy of the Nairaba’s, c. 1977-2010, Benin 1977. Ogunmola, Chibuzor, et al.: Acquiring Wealth in Modern Day Nigeria, Ibadan 2006. Ifadomi, Rafiu: Oppressing your neighbours for dummies, 1st ed. 1976, 3rd ed. Abuja 1988.

 

 

 

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