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JumpOff 6X9 FINAL.

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1/6/11

9:56 AM

Page 82

lorraine pintus

jump off the hormone swing

Mental/Mood Symptoms Test
In this section we deal with the “M” in PMS: mental symptoms (those connected to your mental attitude about being female) and mood symptoms (weeping over Hallmark commercials). Place a check in the box next to the symptoms that recur with some predictability up to two weeks before the start of your period. Mental Symptoms: � I dislike being a woman � I view menstruation as a curse � TV ads for feminine products make me squirm � I lack desire to “do” life Mood Symptoms: � I feel anxious, restless � I hear angry, critical words pour out of my mouth � I cry for no reason at all � I desire to hit someone or something Zero: 1–2: 3–6: 7–12: 13–16: � I want to hide, run away � I am impatient with everyone and everything � I feel like “a mood playground with emotional swings and slides” � I feel lonely � I feel sad � I am sensitive, easily hurt � I am unmotivated, no inner “oomph” � Other ________________

Take DNA test to see if you really are female. Soak in a bubble bath while sipping chamomile tea. Memorize the help found in chapters 7–11. See a doctor or health practitioner who specializes in PMS. Dig out the white jacket with the long arms and cute ties in the back.

Add up your score (give yourself one point for each box checked) Your Score __________________________________