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written by
TYLER
C’mon baby. Give it to me.
More CLICKING.
TYLER
Hell yes!
BANG!
The bedroom door SLAMS open and MRS. BRUNSON (40), young-
looking for having a son, but she maintains a short and
manageable “mom haircut” and conservative clothes.
MRS. BRUNSON
Tyler!
TYLER
(faux-nonchalance)
Mom! Hey!
MRS. BRUNSON
What the hell are you still doing
here? Have you seen the time?
TYLER
Shit. I gotta go.
MRS. BRUNSON
Not yet, you don’t.
She moves to the computer desk and grabs the mouse from his
hand, CLICKING it to reveal the hidden window.
TYLER
Mom, wait!
TYLER
Listen, I can explain.
MRS. BRUNSON
Oh, Tyler. I thought we already had
this talk.
TYLER
We did, I just--
MRS. BRUNSON
You’re not supposed to be doing
this before school. You’ve already
brought home four tardy slips.
TYLER
(pleading)
I’m sorry. I--
MRS. BRUNSON
(interrupts)
You know I’m not one of those bible-
thumping parents that thinks stuff
like this is a sin or whatever.
MRS. BRUNSON
It's natural to want to explore. I
understand.
MRS. BRUNSON
But this. This can wait until
you're older.
3.
TYLER
Wow, thanks, mom. I'm impressed
with your open-mindedness. I’ll try
a little harder from now on.
MRS. BRUNSON
Cut the shit and get to school.
MRS. BRUNSON
Ty, one more thing?
TYLER
Yeah?
MRS. BRUNSON
Put on some pants.
TYLER
Right.
Mrs. Brunson sits down at his computer desk and looks down at
the screen with interest.
MRS. BRUNSON
I wonder what the big deal is...
MRS. BRUNSON
Ooh! I won!
She bites her lip as she settles comfortably into the chair
to keep playing.
4.
TYLER
Shit! Shit! Shit!
Tyler pedals hard on his bike and leaps off, lets the bike
CLATTER to the ground near the school’s entrance stairs. He
runs up the stairs, taking them two at a time.
Tyler stops at the top of the stairs and looks back down at
his abandoned bike.
TYLER
Shit! Shit! Shit!
TYLER
Shiiiiit!
MS. CALDWELL
Mr. Brunson!
MS. CALDWELL
Over here, please.
5.
TYLER
(exasperated)
Yeah!
Tyler stands at his locker with his head pressed against the
metal of the door. He looks destroyed.
A hand flies in front behind Tyler and SLAMS hard against the
locker next to his.
The hand and locker belong to CHRIS JENKINS. He’s also 16,
taller than Tyler and athletic. An artist in a jock's body.
CHRIS
Yo!
TYLER
(miserable)
What's up.
CHRIS
Damn. Caldwell did a number on you.
She was so pissed you weren't in
homeroom.
TYLER
Yeah.
CHRIS
That's your fifth tardy, right?
TYLER
Yeah.
CHRIS
So you're kinda boned, huh?
TYLER
Yeah.
AUSTIN (O.S.)
(singing)
Get the fuck out of my way!
6.
Tyler and Chris turn to see AUSTIN WEINSTOCK, who runs down
the hall, parting the sea of students in front of him.
AUSTIN
(to Tyler and Chris)
There they are!
The trio walk together down the hall through the throngs of
students, all gathered in their own little cliques.
AUSTIN
(obnoxious)
What’s up, boys?
CHRIS
Ask Tyler.
AUSTIN
Someone’s grumpy.
(to Chris)
What’s wrong with him?
CHRIS
He was late again and got reamed by
Caldwell.
AUSTIN
Getting reamed’s not that bad.
AUSTIN
(ignores them)
Isn’t that your fifth tardy?
TYLER
Jesus! Why is everyone so obsessed
with fucking "tardies"?
7.
AUSTIN
That’s what their called, right?
(beat)
I don’t think I understand the
question.
CHRIS
Just forget it. It’s the last day
before Spring Break. Caldwell will
forget about it by the time we’re
back. Why were you late anyway?
TYLER
Mom came in while I was online
doing my thing.
CHRIS
Doing your--
AUSTIN
Bro, did your mom catch you jerking
it? That happened to me last
summer. Right when I was about to--
TYLER
Jesus fuck no. It was worse. I was
stuck in a tournament and it ran
long. Was winning till my mom
walked in and kicked me out.
CHRIS
You’re still wasting time with
online poker? You can’t even make
money with it. What's the point?
TYLER
Well, yeah. But it’s like...
playing tee-ball before you go to
little league. Right?
AUSTIN
Or like jerking off before you
fuck.
8.
Tyler and Chris look at Austin for a moment, and just shake
their heads.
TYLER
Do you only have the one brain cell
that activates masturbation and
literally nothing else going on in
there?
TYLER
You're useless.
TYLER
You gotta practice before you
actually play for real, right? And
you two aren't exactly a challenge.
AUSTIN
So you're just gonna jerk off in
online poker for four years till
you turn twenty-one?
CHRIS
Four years for your held-back ass.
It's still five for us.
AUSTIN
Right. At least I got that year on
you. So fuck you, Chris.
The group stops at a vending machine down the hall from their
lockers. Austin pats his pockets, then holds out his hand.
AUSTIN
Spot me a couple bucks? I need a
Monster.
CHRIS
Clearly that extra year didn’t help
too much.
JACKSON
I gotcha, buddy.
AUSTIN
Oh. Thanks. You really don’t have
to.
JACKSON
Well, I know you’d do the same for
me if I was in need.
TYLER
So, what do you have planned for
break, Jackson? The Hamptons?
Paris? Abu Dhabi?
JACKSON
No, I actually don’t have any
plans. I’ll probably just end up
hanging around the estate while my
parents are in Europe.
CHRIS
(to self)
"Estate."
JACKSON
How about you guys?
AUSTIN
We’re going--
CHRIS
Pretty much the same. Other than
the estate and Europe part,
obviously.
JACKSON
That’s cool, that’s cool. Well,
maybe we can all hang out or
something. We just put in a great
new--
TYLER
That’s great, Jackson. But, we
should get to class.
CHRIS
Don't want to get Tyler another
tardy slip.
The group breaks off and Tyler goes away on his own.
AUSTIN
Say ‘hi’ to Zoe for us, loverboy.
Austin and Chris walk off together as Tyler gives them the
finger. Jackson is left behind.