This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
A BOHEMIAN FOOL ANDREW WATERS .
A Bohemian Fool Copyright © 2010 by Andrew Waters Andrew Waters has asserted his right under the Copyright Act 1968 to be identified as the author of this work.com . Published in Perth. www. Australia. WA. All rights reserved.chargan. Ltd. Published by Chargan Pty.
it could be deemed quite different than this. depending on viewpoints. It is us. a space with nothing to fill in. Our pertinent charm overshadows our slain and forgotten hope of independence. when in reality it resides within. But it is our peace we seek. but this plan that layers every cell is not one we show anything other than indifference to. The others sit patiently with their thoughts to accompany them. The insidious scheme that surprises and terrorises us is only due to our lack of awareness of its hold on us. One we have searched for in a multitude of ways. one that appears to control our destiny. In fact. a guide or some greater force. our malnourished anxiety stays with us and our conversations alter. only later to fall from a cloud. it takes us to places we do not want to be. it forms many angles and deviations and who points the arrow is not the man who fires it again and again. Whereas. The cyclic motion that leads us out into the ocean. Simplistically and categorically. an indelible stamp on our every move. they suffer the indignation of a full view of themselves. and it impairs our ability to not fear for our isolation in this wilderness. They see us as detached without reason or belief. is one that is clear to see. There is a force that drives us. Obscurity befits us all. and rise into the atmosphere. We repeat the process again and it is one that we cannot negotiate. but it always leads back to here. . only a mere change of direction or a rearrangement of attire. we have nothing to smile about in our smug knowledge of one or two minor matters. There is no forward move as there is no opposite. There is a great deal of wandering. thus repeatedly astounding us. The view looks different from here.Introduction There is never a beginning to speak of. but their ownership is only a temporary one and as they tire and their ageing cells are not replaced and their mechanics falter from too much movement. Our requirements change. Hermes is a blueprint for our madness. some of us flow through every tributary and ocean. we fare little better. it is interpreted as external.
Zapsat Chapter 18 .Zdravi Chapter 6 .Blazinek Chapter 19 .Hlupak Chapter 14 .Bohemia to Bondi Chapter 22 .Snih Chapter 16 .Nedele Chapter 15 .Duchovni Chapter 17 .Trznice Chapter 2 .krásná žena Chapter 3 .Rovnost Chapter 13 .Penize Chapter 9 .Orlojem Chapter 4 .Laska Chapter 11 .Svobody Chapter 10 .Contents Chapter 1 .Voda Chapter 7 .Tuzex Chapter 20 .Neurozumny Chapter 21 .Bratrsky Chapter 12 .Zimni Chapter 5 .Rodina Chapter 8 .Konec 1 10 18 26 34 43 52 61 70 78 85 92 100 107 113 121 128 135 142 149 155 163 .
one everyone longed to visit and maybe stay. He dreamed a dream alone. The scenery flashed by. it could be so superficial or have no regard for the human condition. he pulled out his bag. A bohemian tale from any source may first appear somewhat contrived. possibly even amalgamated from various sources and diluted suitably for consumption. from a Chinese man in Brisbane. However the truth is a rare commodity indeed. He signed and gestured to make himself understood.Trznice Dominic was a passenger in a car that stopped for a Czech beer and a sausage along the way at a roadside hut. any such tale. The car ground to a halt on a slight hill. The people seemed grey and maligned to Dominic as he glanced. as he had come from a land of optimism and naivety. Any story is hard to cite as being true. He then got back in the car and slept on another time zone as the road narrowed and bent and the holes in the road disturbed his gentle rest. as in life there appears not to be one. its nerve endings jangle and are exposed in the moonlight and are always visible throughout. It was a sunny day. The 120Km trip took an eternity. it does offer bare emotion in all in its glory.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 1 . from what is now part of Czech. He wanted to reach some destination he had never been to. one of the last that still had some warmth. Vladimir was friendly but he did not speak very good English. which made it easier to pull. en route. but this was to be his new home. like most things. Nevertheless. It might not allow for error or suitable contrast and it certainly will not offer any ending that will suggest any level of satisfaction or conclusion. Unfortunately. His driver. the passenger stared through the window at the old buildings and moderately busy roads without knowing of their importance. He didn’t necessarily want to see. it somehow can only be described as a rolling process we are fixed to. that year. When they reached a gentle slope and descended into the city. a Russian man and his friends. His habitual smoking and lack of activity caused 1 . is fundamentally and exactly that. It had wheels. It was to take his winter clothes in as he had shipped his suitcase with summer clothes. it could fragment or lack action. a price cannot be negotiated or its value calculated for such explicit knowledge. which naturally makes it seem unreliable in terms of its authenticity or sincerity. in fact. but this was of little use as he was led to an apartment up four flights of stairs and he was made to carry 23Kg to the top. this was fitting as it was made there. as he opened and closed his eyes. who spoke loudly and gesticulated aggressively. joined him. the infrastructure maligned by years of neglect and little funding did not allow for rapid transit through the ancient green fields. a long green one with ‘Australia’ blazoned across the side. He’d bought it cheaply.
a razor blade had been left inside his spleen after an operation and as it moved slowly through his intestinal 2 . He wanted to steal some words and desert from this petty war until love eclipsed his soul and returned him home. destined and immediate solution. but this would not solve the riddles of the jesters’ tales. to do so. he could consider what they might have aspired to. He had become quite desperate to find a solution to rid himself of the pain. but none better than Bohemia with its ancient fields of mustard and rhyme. He wasn’t able to rid himself of these bad feelings that were fixed in his mind that she had produced so capably.Chapter 1 . so amusing his stories of him. he felt worthy of such a role. He felt dizzy and tired from his journey. so bright his clothes. a rest perhaps from the traumas of their time. as he worked through his troubles. this would surely fail him again. could learn how to cope. as they had done throughout generations. it undoubtedly brings misery and suffering and follows an ancient pattern of illogical reason and lies without any progression or thought. His driver had informed him of the great benefits and some of the things he could do in his smiling manner. He too. She disturbed him still. blew away any hope for the recipient. it was therefore a fitting temporary home for a man dazed with sorrow and in need of a lifeline of hope. For centuries they had come. her sentiments were selfish. For someone like Dominic. So preoccupied had he become. he did less and felt nothing but sadness. to assess others and their deep misfortune. An array of activities was on offer and numerous historic places to see. He had to somehow change this or waste another lifetime. the opportunities were rare and the wish less so. the Czech Republic is a place where men have suffered in the turning tide of history. As a destination. and troubled even those who didn’t know her. history and perspective. aristocracy and royalty. but this time the devastation she caused. There are many destinations suited to solving the dilemmas of our lifetime. One person had had a major impact on others. He wanted to meet her again. she had always done so.Trznice breathlessness. It is a mere two hours in the air. but Dominic wasn’t overly excited about this. rendering all his attempts at recovery as ineffective. However. all desiring a longer and healthier life. this seemed a predetermined. they left a legacy which he could perhaps cohere to or learn from. He wanted to sit in some cafe. yet this day he had only flown from London. he saw little. anything in fact to alter his path. he thought. He discovered quickly that his new city was known for its ability to revive the health of those who could afford its delights. some of which was in English. It was as if. He hoped finally. is based on a whim. The nature of deception it seems. He sought an injection of culture. He was in good company. He longed to function again in a systemic and beautiful way. Vladimir gave him a magazine describing local activities. it was like a cancer that engulfed his entire body and soul that destroyed the remaining living cells.
it seemed. the east and once the north in the hundreds of years that came before Dominic’s arrival. A backdrop that was laced with relaxing sounds of flowing purity. might just be the relics and remnants from the past. as he wept. He 3 . Karlsbad and Carlsbad were its Czech and German names. The Morpheus. through reason and rationale but there was no logic he could see. of piano played with passion by a knowledgeable soul. There is something in this city that provides clues to understanding the mysteries. he had hobbled through life. Karlovy Vary. it sliced his tubes and hurt him. but he had surrounded himself with all the reasons and methods that had led him here. The question ‘why’ came to the surface of his daily thoughts. They seem rarely to exist. or an answer either. there remained something that transcended these political changes. and it gave him sharp and constant reminders of his loss. He witnessed sketches of his path that he needed to follow along each street he walked. Now the Soviets commanded housing and not their army garrisons along the border with the Bavarian capitalists. and why there is this long and bloody history. Like others. the west. Why are these processes repeated every time we are reborn. It was a melting mélange of decaying madness neatly packaged into a daily nightmare guided by fear and hatred. He had considered his fertile and kind nature and assumed it was not required in this world of commodities and sales. it could act as an inducement to rest his weary soul. that seemed to be required to deaden this severe and overpowering pain. It was not a coincidence. of how and why we unravel issues in ourselves in our lifetimes. Every movement was punctured with blood that oozed. minor volcanoes and earthquakes combined to form an active environment. It resonated consistently through his tall frame that had become lighter and leaner lately. It was known by different names. There was a feeling in Dominic’s mind that he had discovered this place in some kind of cosmic accident on the Internet. fixed in his mind. Much had changed. that there are many tales of. He still lived with the memories of fairer times. by different people and popular with Russian tourists who had left and come back in a different form. this small city.A Bohemian Fool system. in every generation. He was once told that he must only spend his time with things and people who were versed in the real world of stars and universal principles. a saxophone gliding with perplexing tones reaching out to obtain absolute clarity. He must avoid the troubled variety seen exclusively on our fixed screens of perception. in this small city. to any of it. propped up by delusions that had now dissolved before his eyes. whom he sought or perhaps even morphine. in every culture? In this small city these things seemed intrinsically connected somehow. but despite numerous occupations from the south. Home for him was now the region where healing waters. He would spend no time with any man. he prayed. he knew he had kissed his own soul in the past and he knew he did not know what to do now.
a momentary glance into the wrong direction and a closing door that led the historical figure back to Bohemia. he too. on an act of childish revenge. unplanned into the realms inhabited by those who merely reside there. Wave after wave of disasters came without warning and Dominic ducked. The story of Dominic is one. Dominic naively convinced himself without ever understanding. This narrative from the past. It was a classic and epic episode of the destructive nature of people inspired by their own delusion. The centre for his modern development of thought had arrived in his eye-line. little point trying to resist this overpowering force. had no place to call home and nowhere to go after a lifetime of serenity. The delivery of a catastrophic event on every level brought him to Czech to escape the aftershocks he felt daily. so succinctly. but even this had yet to aspire to such notoriety. where only the brave could even claim to have survived the onslaught the gods had delivered. but her torment and destruction taught him this. they were separate in anyway. loosely wound onto its pages. it is a story without a theme. however. The credit rating of pure devotion was monitored on a monthly basis and he had not done well lately as repression had taken its toll on an unsuspecting soul. But. Throughout this time. There were so many times he thought and believed that it could not get any 4 . It was not as if. the not so distant past. This ceased overnight. For when humanity loses its compassion and kindness there is little left to know. There are some things that cannot be influenced or altered perhaps and he did not believe this previously. His heart and the Czech land would not divide anymore. only to be jolted in his chair whilst he sat listening to her song. he promised himself this and hoped for divine intervention. and it took the recipient on a voyage. whose world was incinerated overnight on a whim. However. a period of two years. It matters little sometimes as to why. The truth mattered little. the magic had passed him by. He had always wandered aimlessly trying to understand something that was unexplainable. where events conspired so catastrophically.Trznice had not followed this ancient advice and he had paid dearly for not doing so. It is a tale of exploration of that mystical notion of love and what it is and is not. it seemed as if there was. it somehow played its part in evolving his world and now perhaps it was speeding up in this time. He suffered unspeakable things at the cruel and unforgiving hands of another who betrayed him consistently through lies and actions that cut him out of a life they had all shared together. Despite an obsessive need to discover the folklore and its music.Chapter 1 . no more wars would ravish this terrain. hid and moved about consistently in an attempt to stem the constant anxiety and anguish it delivered. he lost any sense of balance or any perception he had known and everything seen as normal was not and everything that was obviously crazy was accepted. in fact.
He arrived in his 5 . He functioned. written by William Bacon. Balance is only gained internally and not from reaching out. The lies flowed unabated and the fantasies were constructed to rewrite history. Men do not know which way to turn or act as they are twisted and confused in their stupidity. Dominic made a hasty and risky decision to travel to Europe. The women quietly. arrange things for themselves and their supposed sanity. The Czech Republic is nestled conveniently in central Europe. This tale is not a story of love. but where was not clear until he discovered an opportunity in Karlsbad. it is set there. as in the real world. but it did repeatedly as the full force of another person’s obvious sickness changed his life so much. under pressure from others. or in fact anyone around him. He had to escape and run.A Bohemian Fool worse. there are only people who. the characters limped through the scenes unwillingly. There is little sense evident for anyone as it is all soundly based on a nonsensical fairy-tale which may have a hidden meaning. there are no beneficiaries as the world is an uncaring place. Men are cared for in a manipulated manner and dismissed for their complicity when it seemed that this was what was required. there are no victors who triumph. crying and barely noticing the moon. this where he found a small city that sits on its western border. He packed up what was left and sent it to Europe with the proceeds of sold items he had managed to hold onto somehow in the storm. He had pounded the streets of Perth in Australia. without much care or concern and he fantasised regularly on enacting revenge in detail. but only as Verona is for that medieval drama. There were some lights in the distance he could see. but it is one that is not clear to the players who perform its rituals daily. its people are divided by varying illusions and the need to compete against each other in character. a place he had not heard of before. looking for answers. It is not an exploration of Bohemia. wastefully. He lay mercifully in pain prior to his departure. he sat cold in his room with no warmth or comfort in a winter so long it surpassed all others without money or food. the two appear to inter-twine in an uncomfortable collusion. regardless of which side they purport to support. The blend of a superseded regime and its successor do feature in a monolithic internal struggle in Bohemia with a demihero and his faltering allies. but couldn’t comprehend. but it featured in his thoughts on numerous occasions. he no longer recognised night and day. opposed to the dramatic one. Old scores were not settled. This contained a universal theme where it appeared that there would be little recovery or acceptance. suffer unobtrusively. Towards the end of this two year stretch of a personalised and imposed new world order. but there was love in Dominic’s mind. or great romance. It is not a recipe for revenge either. In its conclusion.
a frightening one. He was totally depressed. they were dismissed immediately regardless of their meaning or sentiment. as it meant she might come back. to add to this was a seven year bad credit legacy. He was suffering from certain ailments from this long journey. many times. It had crippled him and destroyed him. There were other ailments he was certain would develop into full-blown illness. for purposes of acting as such. He felt unable to carry on. he felt his friend was there for the entirety of this 6 . he saw no future without her. His eyes were a problem. It was planned. a car. there was an understanding of the difference he felt. It could not be easily dismissed. There had been so many tears that had spread themselves across his cheeks. The famous visitors to the magical healing waters of a spa town had not recited many things with absolute clarity. despite not wanting to. it can lead the lost soul home. an apartment that was furnished and money too. She left him homeless. Whatever path is taken and Bohemia is only one. All that time they had spent together. she no longer listened to his words. This was nothing like the real thing. when he had always felt above this level of interaction. none. Dominic did not avoid this. not knowing why or what it will do to us. he felt. and he was prepared to do so. It was a shock. it had severed all his connections.Trznice new home after a big fall. it is only about emotion. as it was a major blow to the spirit and his purpose. He no longer needed to think of situations that could invoke it. He had joined a long list of victims. He was in exile from himself. They touch and run down our skin penetrating the pores of our unclean mask and suit. His new job in Czech gave him these things back instantly. Banished from his family and detached from sanity. he did not waiver at the thought of ending his misery. He initially thought it could be resolved. The thought of being rushed into medical custody was appealing. This sickness was something new he had not felt before. but it is unclear how we can. It was September. they hurt and there were infections. there were no solutions to this. half his and her age. It had taken over his life. but this tale is neither a religious or a philosophical discussion. It is little more than a ramble through the psyche and its luring neurosis as detailed so eloquently by many in the past. a parable often suggests such a notion without giving the method. She had shipped his entire belongings too. He had been betrayed in one moment. which overnight was rendered meaningless. he was left with his clothes and not a car to transport them. he would join her in her Middle Eastern enclave. the spa water has obvious properties we as men can benefit from. there is nothing of any value that he could see. they had seeped unwittingly without control. sent by him to recover from the ashes of his past. he still hoped to return.Chapter 1 . he constantly said out loud. we ask for more. without money and hope. There is another version of this. Laura had taken everything from him overnight when she fell in love with a man from Algeria. as many others had been previously. he did not avoid any of the things that destroy men. Life was only pretence.
but to a place where he once remained in peace. Dominic recalled everything he knew about a crusade. He wanted a tree house at the very top. A place. However in another way. and everything is always a mix of objectives and perspectives. He longed for something he could not define. with views overseeing land and a sea as wide and as beautiful as the Indian Ocean he had said good-bye to on its most eastern shore. he wondered if indeed he was happy with his new life. The streets were not a place of serene silence that he could contemplate. This was a mistake of epic proportions on one level of thinking as he had clearly had his sanctuary foreclosed. He was not. His castle. he suggested to himself. he moved from this to numbness. but pretended otherwise to others. in this very modern and undefined world we appeared to reside in. Leaving Bohemia was as easy as arriving. the purpose had escaped him. perhaps. there was doubt. the Tibetans say. He always spoke of responding. all engaged in a personal battle to keep them from themselves. like most others. this had been a closer reality than he would have liked. internally. He wanted some sanity he could feel. none were as significant as he thought. had been overlooked by his floating and mercurial nature. but for what. but the war still raged in hearts and minds. Sometimes. For some reason he lived through each day. if he could avoid living on the streets. visiting Czech as a representative of his branch of the human race. not of his place of birth or country. There was always another side to things. rendering any hope of surviving this flood unlikely. where you become the enemy. This superficial division of culture we so subscribe to allures and classifies us and it must seem as if we are no longer interested in its differences. this is a way to survive the onslaught brought to men by others. it offered a branch to his plant life nature and the root of his soul.A Bohemian Fool life. We meander through the great ocean of Samsara. he did not know. he did not fight it. he would not survive out there in wind and rain. he considered many things. He was like so many others. its alien location offered clues to many things he could discover. it surrounds every thought and action. We become what we oppose in our quest for what is right. despite Dominic really no longer wishing to live her crazy version of reality. By means of silence he accepted his fate. which most men cultivate and sometimes need to retreat to in times of conflict or in times of assault. Nothing was clear. as it 7 . a sanctuary from himself and others. A painter who is unable to mix paints on his palette is one who divides his reality into compartments and therefore does not see that all colours come from one pure light. he. He was never quiet about it. a place where no one could find him. The lack of conflict or strategic planning was a key factor in his survival. had lost sight of in this deep state of confusion. or storms that would lower his caste and expose him to the all the elements. after all. without the fight. but did little to suggest he would.
This can happen. He felt that his own personal disaster could be a forerunner for a series of sinister events which were unfolding slowly in the world. waiting to be filled with cargo. likely to be an omen of what was to come? Would he find this island of the great white cloud that waited for all of us? This is the one that is so far from Bohemia. but it required something tangible to hold onto and not something he could not deny so easily. The same shapes and ideas were being created everywhere in a grey monolithic Soviet like structure and if this was a redefining period of time. personal version of the truth were transplanted by means of hatred and replaced with notions that he had never understood. a place where he could not leave until winter was done. A bohemian lifestyle was preferred in a resort not too far from familiar places and a few known faces. the TransSiberian Express. The world can detonate into chaos without notice to us. but it was all an enormous distance from Australia and he was far from himself.Chapter 1 . knowingly or willingly. Siberia was one. the snow not allowing an easy escape. not the twenty thousand as before. The synchronicity in personal lives and the world that surrounds them is not an act of collusion. Somehow all the events that were valued and his own. men have always lived within the period of time bequeathed to their hapless souls. economic depravity and a total loss of everything. descend into war. no water reached the shore and no man asked to sail from here. it seemed. It was not a question of explanation. England. in fact. it did not touch or inspire many. He hoped his experiences would assist him to survive what was about to come. as there was little to say that had not been said. Any ship from Bohemia. not many wanted to try to understand or cared to know. sat those whom he had known. Dominic’s life was also being assembled in this way too. even to his enemies. It was as if. but he also realised this might be solely an expression of his imagination which he fired to counteract the assault. but was his experience therefore. This is one thing that he would not give. He no longer wanted to blame himself for failing to hold onto his family. He compromised and sought something closer but not so far away. It was certainly easier to not even try. he was vilified at every opportunity and laughed at by many. the only option. 8 . had to be an empty vessel firmly aground.Trznice did not interfere with his sadness. his place of birth was near. to avoid thinking alone and in his isolation he sought places to go. Not one person tried to discuss Dominic’s dilemma. no one was interested whether he lived or died. The one world it is was being imposed on us all slowly in a different way. a thousand kilometres from this place. There did exist a need for him to find an answer to many things. quicker than we were all able to keep up with. He felt that his life was being shut down for good this time.
by design. cars marked with Ukrainian registrations plates would pause and five men. an ever-changing society. he decided. some comfort. cooked food. only for the down and lonely. he sought to go beyond the gates of Hades this time. it seemed. There was sufficient heating. German families would come at weekends to learn of their former territory. He saw the mass of bone and water as a vehicle for his journey and this was enough for him. He was looking for a Hermes figure to guide him through this afterlife and seek the pleasures that are promised. asking for directions. that he could bathe under. He would make it comfortable here in exile. Was there any choice involved or was it a gamble which he had no control over the odds or the outcome? This he had not considered. The car never had an empty seat. as he desperately needed some form of empowerment. The apartment was small but held all the things he needed to survive. Dominic suspected there were new plans for a silent invasion. He wanted to know the mysteries that had been kept from him. 9 . Russian groups would congregate with their guide and discuss many things before moving on. whilst retaining solitude. tattooed and big would climb out after many hours squashed together. lost. people congregated whilst they waited for buses and there were a handful of small bars with machines to gamble on. Trznice. Outside. He lived next to a bus station. named the market. There was work here for them all. A small TV with access to Europe’s favourite channels in his bedroom and his music was contained on a small pocket size hard drive on his small desk.A Bohemian Fool However. and he still needed to find a way out again. He had forced his way into eternity. Sometimes visitors would stop here. a small desk and a bed to lie on. salty. the men certainly were from the Ukraine. It was busy. hidden in many ways and now was a good time to learn of their value. perhaps on the daily flights from St Petersburg or Moscow. but they seemed ‘rough types’ to a new arrival such as Dominic. He found a rundown supermarket and a bar. This was unfounded really. it just looked totally run down as Europe does in some places. to get their bearings. It was not in any way appealing to Dominic and its clientele appeared threatening and volatile. Dominic went out to find food. There was a Czech style shower. which were frequented as early as ten in the morning. which seemed fit. He saluted the divinity within himself and others. There was a small supermarket named Albert and a small restaurant attached selling cheap. It was a curious mixture of people. it reflected the composition of cultures and race in what was. handheld. east European food. always and offered stodgy. only if they were in need of it. natural light from angled rooftop windows. He would not venture this way again in case his ticket to return would expire and he would be stranded there between life and death.
Chapter 2 . How the church designers would loathe this new religion of fixing temporarily our lifelong suffering. a sacrificial pagan ingredient we never really understood. We did not know it. and now it was time to move forward. he felt. in fact. it is the station to go for local trips. they no longer needed to pretend to us about our place on this earth. offering trips to nirvana and back in a multitude of ways. in one sense. He had been dragged down to the depths of others. as more constructive. Education forgot to mention the flow of energy and how to channel it. Dominic did not choose an easy path. There were those men and women who tormented themselves with their understanding and expression of that and did not leave a legacy or ever return to explain this to us. it 10 . one that seemed kinder to our hearts. had been caught up in someone else’s set of life rules. perhaps they would understand? Surely. Do we believe that we can harvest the seeds we have sown with a scythe? They knew we were caught up in a belief system that we subsequently discovered had another side. there is always a natural fear and the seeking of a return ticket. it had been stated once again in an eternal cyclical pattern that went beyond one lifetime. After all. It is possible to think that perhaps that if you went up and down then there must be some satisfaction or conclusion to your journey. but the perspective that surrounds you intercepted your journey. Dominic’s constant consultation with the oracle helped him decide that it was time to look outward and to try to no longer reflect. but they might well know more. What would those masons say to us? From their knowledge of the planets and the stars they explicitly display on their monuments. in what appeared. a semi-mystical place to the initiated. You can go to the suburbs and back. This took us away to another regime. However. which is perhaps construed. and another set of values and rules we had to comply with. This can always happen in any year or season. this temporary feeling of euphoria. It was born again on suffering but superseded its origin. rather than discharging it so quickly.krásná žena Chapter 2 . he’d had his energy stolen. no more than this. But. with its visionaries who now disguised their intent in the form of street hustlers. Dominic’s ruling planet had turned direction again. he chose a trip that involved feeling and perceiving things as our ancient predecessors once did. It was time to be a living entity once again. Dominic had arrived. Dominic too. but local ones only. The seeds he had planted had strangled his independence and it had left him in a type of purgatory. this was far enough for him now. it is the one that sits in the centre of the past. this is before a gift of coinage or more and in return.krásná žena On arrival. Trznice was close to him. it can be taken in the direction.
ignore his special call. he no longer cared too much about many things. Dominic imagined a scenario. After losing everything so dramatically with no recourse. This higher purpose became a kind of faith. he had always wished it was different and this ignoring of the truth had served him badly. Not Dominic or anyone else he knew. It was a curious situation and not one that anyone could have prepared himself for. gift wrapped and kept in a heart shaped chocolate box and then. He had hinted previously. Claudia and he was scared. when autumn had passed and winter held him in freezing conditions with his new coat and boots to warm him. He had to wait to see what was best to ensure a full and speedy recovery. It was easy to reach. He had to wait until a Peruvian bird flew into the city and delivered a new heart for him. he tired easily of the incessant nonsense and the great scramble to survive. Only then could he plan his journey from the underworld and return to tell others of life after this one. especially if you have a natural adversity to the world as Dominic did. Dominic was hired as a teacher of English. Dominic was never sure. His job was a simple one. and he would smile incessantly. He had no desire to interact with the Czech people other than when he had to at work. He could not labour too intensively and in his stupidity. He sought to discover it all. a developing one. until the transplant was complete and he had recovered. He knew how to play this game. it mattered little at this time. it is when darkness controls the skies more than the light. his version of. He only needed to survive and then he might take to the water again. he wasn’t sure. How long he would last in this small city. as he would surely know when and what he needed to do. specially ordered.A Bohemian Fool was not time to find this mythical island with the great white cloud. but private conversations he had conducted in shelters or in rain soaked parks by means of mobile technology. And then as winter lingered he would either recover slowly from this operation or make haste to see Claudia again as early as the Chinese New Year. to free himself from his earthly pain and sorrow that Laura had delivered to him. but he had risked losing the only thing he had left. He needed to wait another year. to himself and others in the many public. and he held onto it with a tight grip in case there was little else. He was petrified of being totally alone. He would fulfil his contract. his friend. where he had to wait for instructions from Hermes. fear drives many decisions and feelings. as he would not recognise him. He would come to him in many different forms and Dominic felt that he had to be ready for his visit as it could come at any time. this stage of life. The bird was scheduled to arrive at the time of the winter solstice. Hermes was the messenger who could take him back from Trznice to Claudia and Australia. Dominic suspected there was another reason. He had struggled to support himself and although he limped through the first 11 . He could not be too drunk or distracted. He had plenty of practice in the past to call on. indifferent to most things. His self-imposed banishment took him to a new place he had no concept of and wasn’t interested in either.
such as food and beer 12 . before he had even realised what had happened. It was very central to things. including the centre of the universe. He had many opportunities to do so. this seemed a minor issue to him at this time. was under threat. He was their answer to breaking through the barriers of learning another language. lurking in the background was the danger of insanity. for many hours and left to die in the searing heat and dust. it was a pathetic attempt at living. It started. The view from his two windows was of rooftops and the grey sky above. This was ideal. it was absurd. when the children were beginning their teenage years. Dominic was part of a family. Laura coped badly with this change. it raised its ugliness from time to time in varying forms and then got decidedly worse in the preceding years.krásná žena year. whatever those things were that were required. Her position as zookeeper of the park and of all things. but this was not his nature to do so. He allowed Laura’s madness to dominate the family. there had been achievement in this world. She fought hard to retain this place within the family. whilst he was being driven in the boot of a car. The apartment was small. He had flies in his ears and he couldn’t hear and he had insects crawling all over his body. He responded as if he had been driven to the outback of Australia and dumped. it was really not big enough for anymore than one person. She interfered with this natural process. he had to work a minimum of 20 hours and he believed he could fool those people into perceiving he was happy and he was not a sick man with great sadness in his heart. upsetting his special relationships with his kids or resisting and spending the rest of his life alone. There had been so much history and so much to love about life. There had been children and laughter. He saw a small piece of light through a small hole. It was the commencement of a long and dangerous journey and despite Dominic’s perception of terror in the local square of Trznice. He thought that he should have acted to negate its destructive force but his lack of faith in his own insight stopped him somehow and he did nothing. Neither was preferable to him. He had paid a heavy toll for having a kind heart in an unforgiving world of superficial nonsense. It backed onto the backs of other similar apartments. as she had installed herself as the centre of it. it became obsessive and it created problems. which to him was important. There was no water either. However. It was at this time the balance and love started to leave this family and he faced a choice of following her lead into the abyss. with so many things to discuss. He was always distracted and felt so tragically lost and empty. Dominic had commitments to fulfil. as Dominic intended no one else to breach its shaped and rooftop ceilings and walls.Chapter 2 . she manipulated the emphasis back to her and gave the children difficult things to deal with. She spied on everyone. when he really should have controlled things more. Its laminated wooden floor was ideal to walk bare foot and the portable robe sufficient to hang his tired clothes from such movement. compared with the trauma of everything else.
he looked pale and withdrawn. but it did not feel particularly 13 . as the cries were as loud. we think. With what is left.A Bohemian Fool and not always any of them. his balance had long been lost when his subjective viewpoint had been wiped clean of all its misconceptions. No one was too sure which was the truth. the master mason stated. and he was not noticeable in a crowd as he once was. but we will be empty of spirit. but she was always listening to others as he did too. Forms of energy will outlast us all. There was a need for some serious care as Dominic had already started to show signs of decline. but in aiding him to survive had conspired to love him more than anyone had done for some time. No one ever stared at the yellow letters on a wine coloured car body. His car was illuminated with advertisements promoting escape from normality and the world discovery of his language. Dominic had the good fortune to have met Claudia. his eye was swollen too. as in most situations both were likely to be true. His age was also against him. not so. It was embarrassing for Dominic. We will always pay plenty. A voice spoke to him one particularly long night. no more than they stared at the big posters on the sides of buses. Once we have paid. one Dominic had felt as he suffered under duress from his persecutor. Dominic’s cultural heritage was not theirs. We must not allow them to disperse so readily. The city seemed run down and old. Some people were resistant to this. we will be left with nothing of any lasting value. in fact. He knew he looked ill. one that may have built the castle on the hill. it was a tough proposition. no one wants to join the ranks of the street hustlers with their stretch limousine cars promising the dispersion and theft of your energy. This was in case she was crossing the county line without permission. but as it read in Czech. his smile was crooked. There is emptiness and pain we may feel inside. he felt empathy with its past. Claudia thought for herself in a fiercely independent way. there will be enough for a ride home. He slithered through the crowds. She had held him in moments of panic and fear and had given him the strength to arrive here. Claudia sat at home and waited for news of his trip. It was an auspicious day. it was guaranteed. Age was taking its toll on his body and now he needed to compete in a commercial game to not be alone. His torture chamber took away his fear of living and installed a fear of dying. Before this soap opera commenced. The local population perhaps didn’t want to or could not afford to learn English. but neither seemed different. There was much to discover and he hoped not to just sit at home and ponder or just cry anymore. hiding his decaying teeth. The local population was restrained and indifferent to another foreigner it seemed. He had lost any sense or understanding in this world and the love within it. They had seen too many perhaps in the past to no longer care. she needed to see if he was completely mad or was just making a concerted effort to provoke reinvention.
he was not someone who could be judged with a normal light of consciousness. But now. hurt and damaged. He expressed his wishful thinking by means of the telephone almost religiously every day after he arrived. but he had lost this place of sanctuary too. allegedly. Yet. Dominic wanted to go home or deep in his heart where once there was calm. he left her country. He wasn’t sure if he had in turn lost her. his father. Tony. He wrote to Claudia and spoke to her daily on the way. It seemed to work. he hadn’t appreciated it. others she loved him and sometimes she confused him. so she didn’t believe he left her. Claudia acted as a small light he followed for a while. he had briefly seen two men before. What forces that brought him here were not known either. she held him for a long time and would not let him go. despite his attempts to leave. But then she held his hand ever so gently sometimes and then other times she pulled at him to take him out of his misery. he had severed the limits and the paralysis and he wore the yellow and red of his jester’s clothes to prove his conviction. Her touch was vital and addictive. her method of caressing and loving was something Dominic had not experienced previously. So she could only think positive thoughts of him. and ran from those who didn’t understand him. sometimes she was annoyed at him. how did he repay her? He left her home. exposed to those age-old principles once again. he left her heart. He didn’t know why she helped him. who was dying of cancer and the other. they both had great troubles which were far worse than his. he didn’t deserve her attention when there were others who needed it too. she guided him slowly. So. He crossed land and oceans from Australasia to Bohemia to understand how she did this. who was extremely old and becoming frail. so wonderful were modern communications. She saw this. wherever he stayed. she didn’t take her love from him. he needed to know if it was just more confusion. One was his old friend. they lay spent and suffered. he thought. He suddenly discovered how crucial this place was. only sharing his stories the jester lay before him to deflect a difficult time. the court applauded his tales of woe. He somehow came out of his trance and he didn’t even know her. He opened his heart to Laura and she kept a piece for her time of 27 years. there was another aspect to be 14 . He received an award for his survival. She held his strings above his head. He offered little in the way of relief. now in this foreign of lands where language was clearly a problem and its people distant and reserved. albeit differently. this was not known to him.Chapter 2 . Then he would perhaps be left here in this small city cut off from the forces of sanity. She was his angel who picked him up. He had isolated himself further from those who sought to care for him. so secure was he. he had come to seek some understanding and sense.krásná žena significant. there was no longer anywhere to go.
may be with you this time? I am tired of referring to the past. “Do you think you could be with me. too complicated. Dominic’s interpretation was vital to begin with. but with her. It’s a long time ago now. too short. only a collection of possibilities as to why? If we take the circumstances of the cosmos into consideration will we feel our way through this mire of pollution? It could help us make it through to the other side of this place we are heading. “I do listen to you. he added.” Dominic rambled to her with little response. What made us susceptible to words and customs. He was tainted with an earthly brush that demons had filled with dark colours and who washed his lighthouse with oil. the men who left clues to all things at the right time.” He concluded. If he was considered too old.A Bohemian Fool considered. I mean really be with me? I think about this. Those who know these issues force through their message to the descendants of the builders of the castle. And when he stays he will surely need to leave right now. He wanted to take this from her. he thought worriedly. where she had been was only a start. If she had already made a liaison then she will not look at him. but this is not adventure with only one possible clue and answer. but its altitude was considerable. As in the Egyptian period. for he promised himself that the next year would surpass the last in terms of content. the balance had now shifted and there were cosmic reasons for this change. people had been fooled repeatedly and made to react to contrived circumstances. Something she may not have considered. so perfectly formed. It’s time I felt this again. He wanted to feel her again. a long and deep conversation and she said many serious words and he listened. I can tell when their opinion or advice is regurgitated from another source and doesn’t come from their heart.” Dominic stuttered. but mature in another. what I am doing this moment. The base camp of Mount Everest. if only she’d touch him again. not normal. He spoke with her just before he went out. transfer her energy to him. He tried his best to act 15 . Dominic felt he too had been selected. But he was throwing about thoughts which included planning. hold him in her arms. But was Claudia ready for such adventure? Dominic wondered. these are the rules. too tall. one time when I could think of nothing else. I have been together once. he thought. the result was. “I do not listen to many people as they do not have anything to say. does she need to be an adventurer and climb to the top where there is little oxygen for her to think straight? When it is withdrawn there is sleepiness and less clarity. He could see her again. I want to think about now. there was no conclusion. the heir to the throne chose her husband to be the Pharaoh. It had to stop one day and when it did stop it would come from an understanding of the past. that we were able to change so quickly? Throughout history there had been manipulation. he might offer something in return. young in a sense. she might say no to him spending his time with her. he had to decipher the meaning of the code.
She held him in the darkness. the ones he had when he was alone. a blockage to the duct. He knew she would understand. But she did something to him. the time difference between Perth and Karlovy Vary was significant. Dominic was teased like a child for his tears. he thought of colour. but he knew that his licence had more time to run. Later on that day he wrote to her. one he had held for so long. telling her that despite only just arriving. not rolling into her arms more often. He was well on the way to his winter wishing everyone farewell until she inspired a revival and a renewal of his faith. It was not a time for plans perhaps. and for once he felt something other than numbness. Not his faith in the unknown. He thought of her.krásná žena normally. he was already thinking of returning. should he fail in Czech and not make a good life for himself. There were things that needed to be done still perhaps. when he clung only to the misery and loneliness in his heart. so he could stay with Claudia and lie in wait? “Can I watch you take a shower and place a towel upon your head?” His final line of a conversation was not an end. Subsequently. Tony and his father were fading away and he often wished to join them on their journey as there was nothing left for him to do. But he was not stuck in a twilight world anymore. she didn’t want to rub his back and clean his clothes. He thought of many moments. as if she held a place high in his heart. he hoped he wouldn’t fail in terms of her expectations of him. He missed her. after making many. From a distance. always of Claudia. She did this for him too. This he regretted. he ventured back to sleeplessness and two hour stints of sober dreams. tears which caused a problem for his eye. This love affair took him away from his troubles but when he was with her there were too many comparisons and ones he did not want to make. 16 . he suddenly didn’t want it to be this way. He tossed and turned at night until she kept him wedged on the edge of the bed unable to roll without telling her first. he thought once to cancel it. But he was restricted to phone calls with Claudia and nothing more. the fantasy balanced the misery. but faith in his deepest thoughts. But he hoped he wouldn’t disappoint her. He wasn’t sure if this was just to please her. but when he lived alone again. she wanted to know him. He was amazed by her reaction to what he wrote. or test her need to have him return.Chapter 2 . he had yet to complete a monologue and he was yet to come home. to complement the one in his mind too. to show him her world. so settled had he become. he thought of his own sadness. he knew she had no need to lie. the ones that freed him from the bonds of performance and of life itself. but didn’t have the nerve to stop driving like this on this bumpy and uneven Czech road. he suggested to her. he made seven hours of which many were spotted with motionless dreams. which caused him to wake up again.
He thought he would wait and discover the best way forward for himself and in turn them. how open his heart had become and so quickly. but doesn’t roast you. as it was too much to contemplate in his head full of sorrow and worry. but how far could she realistically go. He was not present at this ceremony as he was engaged in exile elsewhere. she too. She was like someone he once knew. She wore a celestial dress to welcome in the coming of a new era for her and them both too. He didn’t understand how they met so suddenly and then were thrown together like it was meant to be as if some profound or divine being had said it would be so. it is hard to imagine the onset of summer in Western Australia. He was gambling on isolation bringing him home again and he didn’t over estimate his position. So it did not feel directly as if a golden age would fall upon them. But when he lived in Czech at the close of summer when the autumn sun warms you. he didn’t care if it was true or a fantasy. Was it the same as Claudia’s? Dominic was not sure. He knew his backstage pass would not last indefinitely. She had her time to adjust from the breakup of her long-term relationship but Dominic had not. that first new moment that was about to begin again. at least to him. He knew. She told him how she had seen a vision. he felt. it was so soon after the dramatics of Laura and the trauma clouded any life with another woman. He had a lot of confusion in his mind. one for him and one for her. may sacrifice some of herself for him and in turn change her world to assimilate with his. But he was locked into a confused regime and couldn’t feel the warmth or the complicit love that was on offer. He had many uncertainties along the way that were more to do with him than them. after all. How he longed to share it with her. In his youth. In fact he was at the starting gate waiting for a different siren this time to hail his new era. One of them together. was this wishful thinking or just some revelation? He liked to hear her story as if she were his mother tucking him in bed. and one that seemed to be a possibility. From this she had become a central figure he looked to. time was important as another major loss would tip the balance into the abyss. He wasn’t really sure of any of it. 17 . she was someone he would have wanted to know. the other a tale of success in his work.A Bohemian Fool She lit two candles. He had pushed their new relationship to the limit by flying to Czech. and he had worried she would let him down exactly in the same manner as he had been and he knew this would be one time too many for him to cope with. This was a good thing. But he could not wait too long. relied upon. He felt unworthy of this position and considered many times abandoning their future together. but how relieved he felt. Claudia was just different from Dominic. Dominic knew it.
It was as if. he abandoned them too. believing he was choosing freedom from restriction. There were advantages to this. But he was never a person to avoid the possibility of something. Laura went quite mad and duly disposed of her entire family. This brings insecurity to us all. it seems our personal lives are also accountable on a regular basis and we are assessed as to our suitability and it is constantly reviewed on the basis of trivia. Dominic even saw signs in Claudia that required complicity and he knew one day she too. would say the same things. he couldn’t see the future held anything for him other than loneliness. a strange mixture of thoughts and feelings which took us all to places. Yet. In the past these were life long. but it became the result of a dip in performance instead. but this fact had changed. he felt. yet. Dominic was in his late forties as men in his position usually are.Chapter 3 – Orlojem Chapter 3 . in truth. This was the only outcome for him when his light flashed and his time had come to be cast out and away from his family. Dominic was a very modern victim of this. which in principle sounds a wonderful concept. were temporary and could be dissolved at any time without notice leaving the one who did not choose this course of action feeling somewhat cheated at his or her investment into another person being lost. The age of the self. In the world of credit. He knew that one day she would once again need a new variety of man. He was sceptical about this naturally. that when we arrived there. he naturally went along with things to see where they would take him. our family unit is broken down further as we are scattered far and wide from our kin. we are susceptible to market forces and ratings.Orlojem What were these relationships we aspired to? They were simplistically conditional and bore no relation to us. takes us further from the very thing we wish to know. He couldn’t imagine having another relationship again. When the person we sleep with no longer meets our needs. we were a product that could be upgraded or traded in once our expiry date had arrived. The fickle nature of life has taken us all down a level once again. with no support from others. earlier he had chosen to leave. he or she is changed. it was how things were. He thought he would now spend his entire life in solitude fantasising about having sex and never actually doing this. such as not having to deal with moody and child like women who want life all their own way without reference to the person they live with. the children were lost and Dominic couldn’t deal with them. His partner and former friend. after we had made some progression. He had 18 . Life was like this. he had fallen into one almost immediately. we wondered why. partnerships as they were now defined. Freedom for him meant loneliness and sadness. It could mean freedom and no more oppression. aided and encouraged to live a meaningless life.
It mattered little.A Bohemian Fool believed somewhat naively that Laura and him were above this annual festival of partner exchange. He hoped there were better ways to live his life. He was alone. he wanted to spend time together. he was wrong. He was a different gender and a different nationality. some silly romantic notions that faded as quickly as they came. it was served from a court in England via a solicitor in Dubai and sent by email to Brisbane in Australia. He had hopes. What is this level of compliance that Dominic failed to notice? He believed he was free. This is the opening salvo. His confidence was low. His immunity was high but he gambled and lost when everything conspired against him. as there was no address known. and she got it via an expensive lawyer who took full advantage of her need to hold onto what she had found. build a home together. that helped lead him to such a catastrophe. It was what she wanted. this principle held firm in his mind. his self-esteem didn’t register on any scale and now he had travelled to a foreign land where no one spoke any English. It was a game to him. he didn’t want to own anyone or be owned. she filed it publicly to validate her actions. it was all in her master plan. Dominic didn’t flinch at this news as it he knew it was coming. it is the most secure prison of all. This ensured he would not be distracted whilst he decided what was next. He believed he 19 . he felt he was just living his life. He lived in a surreal world and wanted simple things whilst he explored his astral world. The mess that ensued and the suffering clearly appeared immense and not just for him. and it made no difference to him. This wilderness of security was not for him. Dominic had forgotten the game he was party to. Dominic wanted to love. but he wanted real warmth and closeness and a joint purpose and a goal in everything. He underestimated the influence of others and he mistook signs as nothing more than a normal problem she would recover from. She captures her slave and leads him around in invisible chains. he could not relate to any of it. but he was far from this. He didn’t need a possessive ‘vaudeville act’ who performed regularly as his ‘raison d’etre’. which he never gave. but if we believe we are free. when we are imprisoned in our thinking. it was put through court anyway and sanctioned without reference to Dominic. He just felt embarrassed for her and his children. There is a period where a silent battle takes place. she had hounded him earlier before he went to Czech for an address. Sadly for him. separated by his physical body. Divorce came quickly between Dominic and Laura. which he bounced back. When it could not be delivered by normal mail. Ignoring it ensured he didn’t recognise it. He felt that this was the most realistic situation he had ever been in. he would be back. Dominic ignored it. The victor parades her devotee to the world. make children together and if he wandered. in fact it was this refusal to acknowledge basic facts in his fool’s paradise. be in love.
he waited for a young girl there. but the young girl only wanted to be his friend. his tour guide to reality. But let us trust those medieval men of faith. it was time for them to reveal their truth. Dominic wanted to see who needed to be honoured and what took him to where he was then. he felt guilty in terms of the children who were 18 and 20 then. He sat in his apartment. She understood English. It was an incredible time where there existed a high 20 . It was enough for now in his ‘baby-step’ recovery. but refused to speak any. He ate and slept in preparation for the 120 km bus ride to Prague that took nearly three hours on those bumpy and narrow roads. he knew the young girl felt as if she was up too early. where was she? It was early and there was coffee to be found. but not such a bad thing. He had let them down. He turned the corner and next door to a Thai massage centre was the travel agent who offered cheap tickets everywhere. and it is written on the walls of their everlasting stone. He felt burnt out from many years of madness. Dominic looked awful. get free coffee and see one of the world’s great cities. he acted as if he had just lost his job. not an effective one. too scared to go out and too scared to stay in. Dominic wasn’t as inspired as he normally was by the prospect of travel. He went inside and after a smile and an exchange of cash. a few hundred Czech crowns and came out holding a ticket to Prague to leave the next day.Chapter 3 – Orlojem assisted in his own demise to an extent. past a tobacco shop where the woman inside was rude and curt. but he had nowhere else to go. He walked back to his apartment and sat and surfed through the 600 or so channels on his TV. and was there any conflict or internal grief? Were we given some space that we had and then had it subsequently filled in. So out he went to the travel agents. It was not too far to walk. for only $10 he could watch a movie. he felt awful and his pretence that he was fine was ridiculous. the German was simple enough for Dominic to understand. Dominic walked through a nobleman’s square. past a building where people queued. They kept secrets from us. he started to recall much of its complexity. It is always hard to pinpoint this at any given moment. but he was not sure why. and it was so cold. Dominic knew he was too analytical and focused on aspects too distracted and removed. He needed to go and buy a bus ticket to Prague. wedged neatly into a roof of an old building. an annoying matter. He had failed to protect them from Laura’s insanity. Many had still pictures of scantily clad women with phone numbers written over their bodies requesting the viewer call for a chat. But he didn’t want to speak with them in any language. He went back to the sports channels and started to enjoy ice hockey. sinking slowly into the ground as we build upon their foundations. The young girl may coat herself with lighter colours to present a desirable look. or his favourite pipe. through the small city. she knew that he was looking deeper inside her to see her true motivation. He put on a brave face to the world.
the motivations although. It mattered little where the young girl was. We betray others and switch in accordance to fashion and pay no attention to the past or how it will affect our next adventure or avoidance. Of Alice. the fact is. Australia was discussed in the capital of the republic as Petra had spent time there and revelled in its new worldliness. our personal evolution is intrinsically linked to each other’s.A Bohemian Fool level of disinformation. as a wonderful day. it looked painful to him. when he said that. They drank copious amounts of Czech beer. she is like him. We are as children. not defined were not in any way problematical as long as they were not discussed with Petra. but we can assume it will last a thousand years in some form. but how much has been shaped and how much is a natural condition. He looked for some consideration to the depths of his predicament. and ones who sometimes want to play. she reminded him of his daughter. early winters day. It’s not a choice we have. once again in the name of faith? Do you think we should subscribe to 21 . If we devote ourselves to something. We each knew what each of us thought about this. It made the simplest of meetings pressured. but is it different to ours? He was a monk of the modern dilemma. then we have closed the gates to other possibilities and pulled up the drawbridge forbidding our escape. we all get there together. but it was a release for the recipient. The symptoms are ripening and as our scythe is sharpened in preparation. and Petra and to him and to us all. but we are on the brink of another surge of change. she was human. will we cut or take the blood of other men. The hand would not be there tomorrow. it seemed. Nevertheless. sometimes want to cry and do not want to be responsible for our choices or actions. Dominic sought the young girl out among the vast crowds of picture takers and storytellers. Petra and Dominic on a cold. the syringe. fundamentally. It made everyone unsure as to why we did things. Dominic found it hard to discover or imagine. Claudia. How can we now access the next door that will open so we can begin our next journey? But Laura didn’t see a moat. We can share our pathway to delusion. They ate and walked. that it was still the same. but you know that your illusion might be different. We can prevaricate about so many of today’s facts. He wanted to say to her. like Prague and its castle. There was danger in case the signs were misread. that it had been enjoyable seeing her again. and Dominic didn’t see a gate. Petra is another form of this? No. someone said. it is linked to the man on the street offering golden moments or golden white powder we could inhale. It went straight into a thigh. a victim of one type of delusion. a fatalistic reality. it seemed so obvious. Dominic saw a hand injecting a leg on the stairs of the metro. He saw things as inter-woven in that everything connected to Laura. this was the difference between them. he meant exactly this. He would take this to any entrance to any room where she remained or where she hid.
blowing down the street. He saw himself in many mirrors all at once. but not from him. but he didn’t want to share his fortune with others. he looked for her and repeated his sentiments as they performed a rhythm as a reminder of her. for it would take him to another place where he would sit for another eternity. There were no fire exits and there was no escape. he preferred it. He had oiled the moving parts and off he ventured again. he had to seek an alliance of wool and fur to simulate comfort. waiting in an indescribable position. he didn’t have this level of income to punctuate his opinions with outbursts of decadence from the crowns of his servitude. She was there and then she was not. if someone would stand at the crossroads and direct his inclination and grab his attention. or perhaps an uncomfortable posture. he saw the futility of this basic of all human acts as barbaric. But. Petra understood this. If it took another lifetime. for something that had no worth. a past master of the art of thought and subjective feeling. it was cheap and secure and his top floor view was perfect. despite her youth not permitting this. The many shops were closed. only doors that appeared as gateways. above the rooftops of the ancient city. tinted with sadness but everlasting in his journey. there were bits of paper scattered around. Dominic didn’t mind this time. working. but someone could hold his hand while he waits in this room for Claudia. Ones that can close and open. but realised it was only some that could halt its progress and foresee. if it could not be done. He carved his pain into the sides of these ancient walls with a knife of his bitter anger. how to shift this 22 . Now he was with Petra in the mirror. This sacrifice on this local level was obviously necessary for him as he didn’t believe in fatalistic pathways. The hotel was round the corner and up the hill from Wencelas Square. They always wanted to take it all. wedged in the side of the walls as an ex-visionary. she would learn. he would be stuck. There was a bed. explaining what he could have done had he actually been there at a different time.Chapter 3 – Orlojem this? Would you let it go and fight for something that others suddenly believed in? What would you say? Dominic knew. there were no people. He was not unhappy he missed out on this. without Laura. His oasis could be found without any subsequent or great revelation. but he was looking for warmth. it would be preferable as he might not find his way. but he was sad he didn’t get a chance to choose. small TV and a small desk where he placed his tiny computer and tried to connect to a free Internet Wi-Fi connection without success. but it didn’t bother him much despite having been in a fire when he was young and surviving it. he could not make this one end now. Could Petra teach him something he needed to know. he thought. Petra was able to do so. as Claudia was not there. paralysed. we came here alone and so will leave this way. a multiple perspective of his physical charm.
but this was only one way of looking at this. Petra and Dominic returned to the station. let alone verbalise. He was holding onto something. hands that were rich to touch her with. whilst she held his body with her much needed love for him. albeit a mistaken one. a panoramic skyline. he wanted to believe there were reasons and a purpose for all this meandering in his brief moments of faith. It seemed to last forever. there were so many others. coloured red and green topped with blue. His time had switched from the bottom to the top of the world. He made it back home to the sanctuary of his top floor room. He needed no more to take the mortal blows. a scarf would hold it on his head. warm to hold her with. on his path. time and space always merged as they were captured in a dream. measures our blind adhesion to our purpose and our eternal process. Here he could write to Claudia and Laura. like the former glorious leaves. the leaves fell and turned brown and blew incessantly around the streets. the one that tormented her and teased her with promises of sanctuary in this cold morning of our universal knowledge.A Bohemian Fool energy into a positive thing when he really wanted to reveal the secrets he had learnt written on the ancient walls of Prague? It was autumn again. Someone wanted to know this. talking to Claudia. He imagined other aspects he could not even recall. a green one. as he could no longer be attacked. There is so much that has come before us and there is still much more to unfold in an evolution that has washed us up here on this island of desperation. He had golden hands like the famous clock. speak with them. dreaming of her with him. And when it is deliberate it can lead you 23 . it seemed to last a minute. Dominic felt secure in his knight’s costume. so confusing were these hours. to some knowledge. His neck would be warm. and think of them. The gentle clicking of a clock. the second time that year. Pastel shades blended subtly for him to smooth out the wrinkles and lines and make him breathe easier when he walked up the stairs. he once walked on and fell over on. there was some hope from the past. He held a picture of his discovery and placed it on his desktop. The silver colour of his new astral body caused a breakout. He woke to the reality of the picture. We pontificate on matters known only to some and we build monuments to please our unknown fathers. can send a rush of energy to a disconnected soul. He also had a picture of himself clad in full armour and he laughed at himself as he struggled to walk. he took the two steps as it looked on the map and was suddenly back at home lying on his bed. The many flights of stairs were causing breathlessness especially if he ran. as he was a knight with a great reputation for fearless action. His thoughts went to another dimension after they said good-bye. The touch. we hope? Claudia wanted to discover the inner essence of her form. something that had not taken place for some time.
Whether this was a young man talking. so beautifully made. to believe that what she did to him and Dominic was acceptable. but he was unsure as to her reaction. his life. a feeling his life is predetermined was difficult to evaluate. but he said to her that even if a small percentage of his concern reached her. His son would call him later. These secrets he spoke of. he knew. or is in fact. he didn’t tell Dominic he was leaving. This was not a good thing. Dominic had searched for sanctuary throughout these years. tell him of his plans of cafes and places and plane tickets. Dominic’s son expected to go and join this battle. Dominic saw a puppet of a fool in Prada. He wrote and spoke. so clearly. that he would not recover easily. he told him. but too young to travel with Dominic anymore. It was possible that Dominic had hampered his efforts to make progress as it was at the expense of his own. Dominic’s son had suffered so deeply. However. He might call again. the ancient city of Babylon. if he was right then he would surely have seen this before.Chapter 3 – Orlojem to places that you think you want to go to and you will run hurriedly to where you have been told to go. that is. but never understood its significance. It wore a jacket 24 . leaving Dominic and the children floundering and it neither worried her or concerned her. He was not sure what to say. Laura. Dominic could not remember such times. This. she needed to arrange it from a different perspective. A public outcry of emotion would soon follow and he would climb the final steps to rest with her far away in that last piece of land where the white cloud lingered over it. if this friend was still there. She created a negative atmosphere with her sorrow. She knew this was true. he might have had to share a space with his friend Petra. Laura was too old now. he had heard and read of times where sacrifice was demanded by others who were motivated by the pagan secrets hidden in the Castle. Laura had told him to collect something whilst he visited Dominic. she thought. he thought was intended to be a short one. she did. he had seen some recent insights into this and he had not joined the society. He knew he was not sure which path to take. He was in a process of being manipulated by his mother. He didn’t know what it would be like when he came. She took him down to her secret cavern where she kept her deepest fears and pain and she pasted them all over his astral body and poured it into Dominic’s heart blurring his vision and releasing his might. he didn’t know his own plan. only to Claudia. Dominic wrote to see if Claudia was still there for him? He knew no one saw this apart from her. yet the longer he lived the more it seemed to slip away from him. a deed worthy of a fool. He could no longer converse with her about anything. she would understand what had been said and what was truly planned. She could not accept this life she lived. but not from some pre-ordained position. which road to drive on. He could say the word.
but we do not know how we do. Entertainers at this time were often dressed like this it is assumed. Dominic had never seen a collage. He didn’t suppose he would. one of those many facts we know. 25 . he only saw a reflection of himself.A Bohemian Fool of bright colours. yellow and red. passing as one.
Dominic had felt this many times. He would not deal with this regime. To Dominic it was a familiar tale. pretending everything was all normal. Emptiness. He chose the latter. but he would no longer try as it took all his energy and time to do so. in their defence they were as much a victim of this new system as Dominic was.Zimni Chapter 4 . but he would not watch them carefully put things in the wrong order. It’s as if someone made the truth no longer acceptable as it interfered with the present. a tiresome rebuff to his comments. So evil was this empire in a biblical sense. They projected only a negative aura. therefore. he could not take this to his grave. This was the problem. which despite its obvious failings did not stop its advancement. the new world order. the Edenites would not overcome King Arthur. When you are alone you are a sum total of this. It was not his nature to do so and neither was it his fate either. and at first it was a little frightening as he realised there existed a void in this busy mind he had. into this trap of believing it would be their salvation.Zimni Dominic told his son not to come. once the fears and apprehensions have decreased. It stopped the new acceptance of all things. It’s not that he couldn’t resist. one of greed and conquest. Then. especially as he has been through a terrible period of time too. perhaps he would be able to rest there. he felt quite bad at not fulfilling his request. we might begin to see its intrinsic nature. The programmed media would not pour their pollution over him anymore. sit in a place where he was just alive in this. Once all the paraphernalia has been stripped away and you finally begin to relax. His policy was clear. all the planning and remembering seem to stop us realising this. It’s part of a legacy. They could not be seen at his table. as they were wound into the new perception. unsuspecting lovers. The new order caters for all in a debt-ridden manner. ‘if you do. you’re left with this. covering her deep-rooted sadness and she acted as the new leader or pied piper and orchestrator. The sky like nature of our minds are 26 . he treated it as if it was the enemy who aimed to injure him. you are damned and if you do not you are damned too’. you are left with this. Dominic perceived correctly that there had been a change toward him. so Dominic had to tell him and his daughter to go too. It is what is left when everything else has gone. If we confront it. not knowing where this was heading or likely to end. It was fulfilling Laura’s anxiety. All the puzzling thoughts that plague our mind.Chapter 4 . It is there to have completely in time. who led others. this ghastly denial of the truth. it was hard to discover its purpose or goal.
some say it was through a natural process as if the financial markets are akin to nature itself. He was not the best equipped to handle any conflict. but he could still labour for some shekels. He could not fight the ancient monsters that sought to take him back to those days of conflict. He no longer feared. he feared the crisis could be an aperitif to war. He was not connected to this set of events or any others they cared to invent. He lost a piece of his harmonious thought. Claudia said Dominic was isolating himself from everyone and everything. until it was used for other means. She was naturally. He always had a plan secretly held in his mind in case of emergencies. the media hysterically claimed. which would not offer too many rewards in monetary terms due to its condition. the rest of the world had been facing the beginning of something quite devastating. Whilst Dominic had been provoking himself into action with thoughts on many aspects solely focused on him. right. He could only use words as his tools and 27 . a song that once they sang sweetly together. it was a time to run. as usual. Sadly. it was suspected. In case there was still a chance for a secret attack using his new found knowledge from the writings of Castro and Guevara. ‘come Dominic’. These days were long and so evil felt the nights. not a likely scenario unless you are someone who had much to lose. as if a light can be sourced through a narrow crack in a hastily made stonewall. he thought precede rather more serious events. he wanted to hold off committing to himself. but this one came without warning. it could. Dominic discovered it was an ingredient in a cocktail of fear delivered constantly. Dominic lost naturally. It came as a raid overnight. turned away from rationale and deliberation. This fear began to encapsulate the people as they clambered for their financial security this time or in the future protect their health from raging viruses. Laura became a talking head of nonsense and all reason merged into an accent of dissent. Some say it was deliberate. No one had won this conflict of hearts and minds. The fabricated moments she created to divert their leaking hearts were so spiteful. A financial crisis. Dominic tried to wipe the smirk of indignation from his face. to escape the mass of lies. there were no sirens. it did feel revitalising though to him to finally see things clearly. a good financial beating where fortunes and savings were systematically wiped out. that Laura told them all. but only just. He turned away from this feeling.A Bohemian Fool linked though this. fear. Dominic survived this war of the Gods. Laura and Dominic. He gazed from afar. He looked for an inner sanctuary from everything. there were many who would fare better than he. He had no assets apart from his body. but the other gods were wise to his schemes and did not succumb easily. It was clear to Dominic that the propaganda really did work. which called out his name. that it was another way in which we would all suffer. only when he clung onto a falling branch of a tree he had planted at an earlier time.
It would be torn from his leg into shreds like old and faded blue jeans waiting to be ripped. but the enemy was not telling him anything that he wanted to know. He was not a juggling act. This would have been an error of monstrous proportions and would have resulted in sadness for lifetimes to come. She had become deeply troubled and this combination was not a healthy one for either of them. There are others who celebrated this time of year as 28 . but it produced a terrifying phase that Dominic lived through prior to his flight to Prague. He would forget this war and concentrate on the next one.Chapter 4 . fit to perform for a King. it will surely end when we can all come together and synchronise our march to the war front. in a time of global conflict? The nonsensical delusions surrounded him. the victors dance is only a short one and the survivors lay in wait to ambush the victors in future times. Dominic was not paralysed anymore. He was dormant and besieged this particular year and more. However. The dying men wait. at least until there is some semblance of satisfaction from both sides. He could not risk this chance of failing and falling so quickly again. It is written in ancient texts that these wars do not end overnight. But the winners get to rewrite history according to their new philosophy. he held onto some rules and one was not trying not to plagiarise his past. He had walked around a nobleman’s city confident he could no longer function properly. but this was not enough this time. This was another event thrown into his mix to confuse him further. our puppeteers who tease us all with promises of a new show coming soon to a small city near us all. This time. but both are just illusions conjured up by those who are involved. but this one he would fight with better weapons and he would be trained for this mission. It’s where we are heading again perhaps? The quest for blood is never ending and our local squabbles will divide us sufficiently to render our loyalty to the sword as our only means of making it to the next period of our time. has been stolen from us by our watchers. for he knew now it would turn to red within seconds. Yet. He had nothing to gain. in retrospect it was clear that Dominic no longer had to perform tricks in public. Who will write this chapter at this time. He could only hope to continue some dream in this time on the battlefield and not raise the white flag. It has never been easy. It was a common error for all learners. He could sing. There would be no early losses next time or no letters of resignation. The madness Laura gave to Dominic would not always be in his head. moving people through time and situations had caused unhappiness. As men lay dying in this sacrificial process. which is really ours. this habit or ‘repeat after me’ method of study. They rumble in the background of his simplicity looking to find their place in time. others were dancing to the sound of victory. and he had no parachute to ease his fall.Zimni sentences to fire. Her expectations were not in line with Dominic’s.
This is a pattern under which. He felt their vibrations pulling him in different directions. They knew the connections and the stars and what they meant. He was protected from her military onslaught. How poignant it seemed? There was a purpose to this adventure. The greater agenda had continued under a different guise. although he fought back. yes.A Bohemian Fool a new one. Dominic recalled some reasons why. The Russians owned this small city. but it is accepted that it is 29 . and she could no longer dig deep into his soul and disconnect him from his purpose. we have our suffering altered and controlled. but now those opportunities had passed and key elements had been re-established under a different name. We remained disconnected whilst they. But he would stay awake in case of eventualities. in case he was missing something. It was hidden under oath. Yet he tried to feel their impact upon him. he was not sure. It demonstrated that religion itself was party to the real knowledge of our life on earth as opposed to the limited version they offered their people. if he had understood its movement. but the sentiments were unsurprisingly similar to the model known. with the protection of the greatest secret service organisation on earth. in fact she had terrorised him completely. he had an apartment on the fourth floor where Laura couldn’t reach him. The many hands of his astronomical clock might have signified his next move. whoever they were. but stopped us realising this one. her bombs that had ripped out and mutilated his previous sanctuary. It sent a signal to the others that there was an attack by insane troopers with rocket launchers wishing to take his land and send us all off to sea. and then there was her propaganda that turned white into red. most of it with their newfound wealth released from centralised rule. Dominic was not in a position to see it. they knew of portals to different realms and understood the world. From the long queues in the little stores to twenty-four hour supermarket shopping is a remarkable change. he did it from afar. stayed in control. it may have offered more possibilities. They bought back their losses after this small city was cast out to a ‘Velvet Revolution’ allowed by someone at a time when the world supposedly changed? It changed peoples’ lives. it was the main attraction for him in a mixed city of appeal. They ruled the people with fear and told us all to have faith. They were reflecting the past twelve months in some traditional way and adjusting their inner most plans according to ancient texts written in Sanskrit. Dominic could not translate this any more than he could understand the movement of the stars and planets. It was the most beautiful clock he had ever seen and he said so. Dominic was frightened by her. They told us to sit there and contemplate and not ask questions but accept their wisdom and they all promised a wonderful after life. whilst the congregation was filled with nonsense. at least at the highest level. What he was competing for. He looked for some edge over his competitors. keeping us away from the truth.
He perhaps wanted to play one last scene before he moved onward. Dominic didn’t have the currency to buy essential food and his planning resulted in an empty cupboard space. It was still dark and Dominic’s new friend.Zimni not different from closing at five. an impossibility without permission. Dominic would miss him very much. He suddenly lived inside a house made of ice. The game could drain from him to another vein and another routine. Dominic too felt as if his time might also be ending. Would it be the green team or the red? He’d take the blue. but she was somewhere else. maybe it would be even worse. It was still cold without Claudia. but he gave it away. hoping or knowing? He could no longer choose himself. there was no time to do all the chores that are required of a person who lives alone. if only he could. Dominic watched the men from Zimni in their green shirts and helmets move quickly across the ice until he understood the calls in Czech explaining the show. When spring arrived it would be gone. The concept of free trade was dominated by cartels of unscrupulous men who in their great quest for notoriety had engineered control over all things that made competition. but he was struck by a need to meet someone. Neither the wasp nor him would accept it was over. A ring of thorns was carved 30 . When he opened the window he flew in. the arena could always be emptied and eventually there would be a thaw. he forgot to buy one. He should have found the time to be more practical. He wanted to meet Claudia. He was alone here in this place. the end of season wasp. his tenure was about to expire. It became the same outside now and soon. if he was leaving or staying. The snow would cover his home and bury his heavenly body. as winter came to this small city. bizarre collection of dreams. There seemed to be little time. it was October and confirmed as autumn in Karlovy Vary. so it was time for someone to decide which way he should go? He wanted to know if it was cold or hot.Chapter 4 . He saw another girl. there was no ‘cartoon character’ blanket as there was in Perth to cover Dominic. He would miss him just being there. He saw no difference in choice. and her body was so soft to touch. He ushered him out until the next time. his East German army hat for the winter to another girl who gave him a look with a sparkle in her eye. clearly there were still memories disturbing his normally. He woke early the next day. He had to be told. he had an old one. Dominic needed a hat to protect him. Sometimes it was vital Dominic talked and touched. devoured by the floor dwellers to feed their habitual needs. it had to be kept cold as the ice would melt and there would be no game. He knew his time was nearly done. and sometimes he tried to sneak in without him knowing. or allow the flow of goods freely through the borders of our ever changing small cities should you get a chance to supply. It’s a compromise to protect the greedy. was not to be seen. but his survival instinct was as strong as any mans.
which he didn’t understand. during difficult times in the distant past when as a young man he was not able to function well. his hunting trip was not organised well. Tony. He arranged a plan. Dominic was bored teaching them after only a couple of lessons. different languages too. periods which were unplanned and where chaos ruled before. But these girls came from the east. He was not sure what to do. Dominic’s lifelong friend. 31 . perhaps they needed to head west. There was little he could do to alter circumstances. he too. But did anyone want to know what he had discovered? Did anyone want to know about his wasp? He looked out of the window and could not see it. the man sounded as if. which exists and is clearly beyond his remit or knowledge on this planet.A Bohemian Fool into her arm to suggest an attachment to something. Over the centuries different countries had presided here. this was sad as he would be losing someone who held him. But the girl said it was a good time to go and see her. A universal law. It was only a group of socialites who played at learning as middle-aged women often do. One student was pregnant and about to give birth. this change in name. Dominic had to say good-bye one day to his wasp and others in some ceremonial way. But when the girl contacted Dominic in response. he perspired and sat down at his desk. it suited Dominic’s style. This girls name was also like this. it was still too early for him perhaps? It was grey and misty outside. and a smile from afar. like the wasp. Some things were like this. this he had learnt recently. But not everything can be understood. The royal decree was passed each time and so different people know this place as different things. but what did he know that he could share? A multitude of nonsense he had read in a book. but at least there was some light. so he began speaking to them as if they were stupid. perhaps it’s different there and it was not known who sent them out to roam. content with their salvaged lives after a communist childhood and not able to converse with him in any other way apart from a basic level. He had to teach this day. Dominic was told to speak slower to his students as they complained. and had been around for some time. a better one than his food gathering. and the supermarket was open all day and night as are the forests. so he left. was about to move onward on his personal journey and he would not see him anymore. They were not much fun. it rules the wasp and the voice heard on the phone. There had been times like these. they offered another shadow and protected him from any bright light. a wave of his hand. Dominic rolled around in the grass with her for a short time returning to his solitude soon after. This girl had many names as the small city did. Tony was dying. It reflected ownership. An intense class who met daily were a challenge to drive. a name for Dominic and a name for others. had sounded weak on the phone. For Dominic. the others gathered round in some form of ritual. The buildings were old ones.
she would watch him. he taught quite naturally. There were moments he felt as if he gave something to others. Dominic didn’t speak German or Czech. and her former friend. it would be explained. he might understand. she didn’t want to let go. Laura wanted to hold his hand. Someone said so many things to which she responded and then it changed her mind and in turn his.Zimni when he could be bothered. and there was some damage to his heart. that was. Zimni was a place that perhaps needed rebuilding or rehousing. He needed some method of obtaining tokens for beer and it was one of the least demanding. despite the industry imposing all kinds of measurable methods on immeasurable notions of language transference. Dominic felt terrible about her predicament. from the land the size of a stadium. and nothing was gained or lost. expressing a wish to speak another way. aged by time and now by unhappiness that he would try not to disclose. to gain some insight into another and in turn himself. so dark was her hair and so sharp her face. in a language to him. It was nothing more than a moment. Then the two of them wandered off in a different direction not knowing why they did. This was in itself a fascinating interaction. He had landed in a free-fall style without a parachute. He could watch the men skate around at great speed. These things. his older face. The most popular sport. she will wish she had not heard. It was not a home he looked for. still in her heart. but in this he saw some temporary change of direction. One day she would know how she was lured unsuspectingly into a web of distraction from her source.Chapter 4 . Another stranger sat in a field chewing a piece of grass. Someone told her otherwise. in Zimni. a diversion from his sadness. and they gave no satisfaction to his curious mind. Dominic would then have a reason to visit. as it had seen an explosion of interest that year. Then. He saw a light of hope to free him from his loneliness. Dominic knew he would like to see this too. If the stranger really did live there. he knew this was his lone skill. But in Czech. for the benefit of others. Dominic didn’t want to be alone in this small city. He was a reluctant teacher anyway. kissing and holding hands. But the stranger wrote to him in German. He would be taken from his hiding place and shown the gardens others had once strolled along together. but these were merely a cover for the mistake to leave Dominic in such a 32 . Dominic suspected his role was that of a free language teacher and nothing more. ice hockey had come of age in Karlovy Vary as the team progressed to greater heights on the ice and a new stadium was proposed. there were reasons given and decisions supposedly made. It was an interruption to his misery. He could make the stranger laugh. This sentiment could only be viewed as a wave of energy he wanted to explore and tap into its ever-increasing source like a geezer shooting with velocity at his twisted face. He would be greeted and hugged. it was slow and tedious. here in this steep valley. all professions bored him. a pair of hazel coloured eyes stared at Dominic from a picture. The stranger came from Zimni. They left others to flounder unaided.
there is safety in numbers. (pratak) sausages were for sale. that sapped his energy and left him vulnerable and made him feel even more alone. Dominic recalled ten years of sorrow that came as a monumental lie. Dominic went to a party he was invited to by one of his students. The game was good this time. his hands were placed in his pockets to keep them warm. as it was too hard for him to stay. When there are two sides one can sometimes take control. so good. the rains were flooding their memories and cleansing their poisoned minds. so after the first period of watching the game he indulged in this traditional activity. as it is where we will find everyone waiting for us in this downpour of rain and strong wind.A Bohemian Fool mess. and ones with a peak on the front. but no longer can they sit there as summer had gone. in silence. it was the start of a long illness that went on for months. the usual crowd of people with scarves and over sized shirts. We must all go home now to Zimni before it is too late. this night he started to feel ill. but he found a short cut through the trees and across the river on a footbridge. but this night the stranger was not there to sit with him and so he sat alone. some wearing hats. despite his vegetarian instincts. and he walked briskly as he always did. a taste he had tried to disperse unsuccessfully in recent weeks. It helped everyone it seemed. this home advantage surely helped the local boys in their green shirts. not restricted with debris or a thickness coming from deposited waste. Dominic thought about Laura on the walk home. Many would like this atmosphere created by only three thousand people. we all had hopeful outcomes and tonight there were no bottles of discontent thrown onto the ice. He could see Zimni ahead. leaving the visiting team hopelessly beaten despite all their efforts. a hasty choice among the deserts of this world. Dominic walked to this place and he thought it would take some time. in the darkness and he tasted for the first time a sense of winter and bitterness in the air. despite promises of better things he had conjured up in his mind to fill his day. it looked clean this river and it flowed gently. It had become even colder. it was getting cold too. but then often the other finds a way to do the same. better than before. 33 . Dominic took the long walk home. It was male only and when he got there he duly left after less than five minutes. Beer and Czech. they would travel home across the country in silence after this. The game progressed accordingly and the score increased in favour of the home side. This is sport in its’ purest sense. Dominic left alone too. It was parochial and noisy. a song played before the start whipping up a mass fury to ensure support. the home side dominated and controlled it. A band had been hired and there was some special winter drink. a punch like knockout substance that only men could take. He didn’t meet anyone there. He sketched out five years of madness after which he could no longer try. The green field she now sits in now makes the wind blow through and then spoils her beautiful hair that was once a highlight.
he wrote to Claudia. how long would she wait. In amongst the foreign lyrics to a different song. but he did not want to find her if she would sit there and refute their past. at least in principle? Would she wait this long for him? What was it about him that could make her want to even try. if only they would care to see. for when he woke he knew she would not be there with him. he heard her when he went to sleep and when he was awake she abused him. Dominic couldn’t expect her to wait too long. who sat and waited for him somewhere further from Zimni. a bench full of replacements should the need arise to take on and off from a game at will. It was OK. he woke up as he didn’t want it anymore. This dawn that will signal another dynasty and another era people may not be ready for. about Claudia and about his place here before the dawn of Aquarius. regained Claudia’s interest in his dream. but no one wanted to see as they had been dealt a conflicting story regarding the historic past. He had managed to suppress her voice in the daylight only to succumb to her image and memory at night. was still waiting. he wanted to hold her. Instead she visited his dream. But then Laura haunted him. What was she really telling him? What was it she had to say to him. He knew it was so. The signs were starting to show. when there were delights and others who would run and even queue for her appreciation and time? There was still some way to travel on this trip. It somehow seemed unfair. but not in a malicious manner.Zdravi He needed no replacements. She talked to him and he responded and Dominic and Laura once again held hands. really it was. Dominic’s friend. but she was not able to come. He had hoped for a meeting sometime. He was always looking for her. was she expressing her sorrow? Was she looking for a way out? Was she missing him? He looked for her everywhere. It was a very real connection that was made. whenever there was a natural break? He had practiced this foolish thing a multitude of times and he had indulged in its pleasures and ran from its meaning. no substitutes in his life. there was forgiveness in his heart. And she was there. would she sit this long before she became too tired of him? Whilst Dominic searched for something that wasn’t easily found Claudia had to continue along a road to wherever it had to go. He had so much to discover and learn. as did her friend one time to tell him death had found this friend and this friend went on to tell him what Laura was doing. and another day somewhere else. Did he spend his life looking always for this. in spirit. one night at Zimni. he felt her presence. He thought she could wait until he finished one song. and he would never admit it to her. Then he slept and despite losing Laura’s presence in his mind.Chapter 5 . about the small city.Zdravi Chapter 5 . a mentality of trauma and a 34 .
The small city was littered with bars. but thought he might do something during the weekend ahead as there was plenty of time. this was a problem. To protect him from this suicidal misery and absolute loneliness he developed a casing of metal to keep him alive and kept out the evil spirits that had taken over his life. He was not included in her decisions either and he made his apologies for leaving so soon and struggled with the outcomes. He talked with Claudia the next night and he learnt of her fears and conditions attached to them being together again. All the bars were quite boring really. But. He agreed to meet her conditions and he wanted to hear every second word she said. Somehow he knew it was coming. He could not see himself living in the northern realms of Norway in winter. The following night he entered into another debate with people he had never met before. He wanted to see if it was aimed like an arrow or caressed his troubled soul. afterwards there would be nothing. he entered a discussion about Laura’s life but it did not include his. which tore him from limb to limb. He dreamed after that of all the family together. He disturbed the flow of this meeting and was not asked to return after he had woken for water and a break from his intercourse with them. Where could anyone run to this time? Preparation is lacking in all our lives. so attuned to these connections had he become. firstly to cut him down and secondly soothe him simultaneously. he knew how dark the world would be without her as if the night continued throughout the day. or perhaps had the capacity as a separate entity to do both. He was invited to Zimni again on the Friday night by two people. unless he created it for himself and sketched out some detail. He consulted his guidebook to see where to go. especially older ones like Dominic. there is never any readiness for what is about to come. very late and it went on through the night. He waited for his call. with tickets to enjoy the fray. Dominic went to bed tired. as he had to go alone. but left everyone damaged. Taking up a minimum four-seat table with one person was embarrassing and he was always asked if he could move to facilitate real people and their social night out. A new grouping and once again he was only a neutral observer and not a contributor. For Dominic. the first was not the one that counted. eventually it came. but could not sleep. But he knew she meant what she had said. He had been involved in deeper negotiations. this resilience was his second step forward. all of them had tables and you sat with your friends. the crowd were young mostly and Dominic expected little and this what was received. He woke with a headache at it had been a long night. without her. The Czech’s were not over friendly and like most nationals found foreigners less than fascinating. He had no time really.A Bohemian Fool determination that saw them through. He needed no tolerance to deal with this. 35 .
They forgot to mention the fact he was left homeless and without a job too. Dominic was barred from any discussion. He knew he would return to Zimni repeatedly to catch a glimpse of something that took his mind to another time. the now cruel and heartless Laura demonised him at every opportunity. The truth was the premier casualty as the lies poured like lava from an erupting volcano out of Laura’s wicked mouth. too long had she escaped the wrath of the gods. In fact they never stopped for years. His anger boiled over sometimes. she would receive an almighty blow. She would not live through it without feeling its effect. but he was a knight of hope and honour and would not be dragged to the depths of humanity by a nasty and twisted woman. but no more he said. shining bright. how can people be silent for a happy life which is not happy anyway. how could they ignore those things around us that are clear. chivalry and loyalty was his trait of character. It would not come from the sleight of his hand or the information he could provide. How could everyone just sit and say nothing. but to her face they were silent. he was out there looking and reflecting. Dominic’s children said nothing. apart from the occasions where it clearly got the better of him. He had plotted with gunpowder and drew up plans to balance this deed. Not one person said anything to Laura.Zdravi Dominic was the new knight of Karlsbad. they didn’t doubt her actions as if they enjoyed the couple’s demise. He felt alive and hopeful and despite the failures he would always encounter. he announced and he would be coming to witness revenge. It was somewhat difficult to move on from this position. their friends merely told Dominic to move on. He would see Claudia again and she would not recognise him in his new armour. It would come from destiny and karma delivered neatly and concisely. a knight of honour and of hope.Chapter 5 . who shipped people like parcels to another part of the world without a tear. Dominic wished all the universal forces would gather and lay upon her a lesson no one had dared to teach her about this life. 36 . he would ride on to a gallant victory one day. upright and only a messenger for their love. Neither would it be the slipping of something dangerous into a package for her love as he had previously planned. Dominic’s healing was over. All those things liked were no longer appreciated. they just suffer and are generally miserable. How mad it was this and how mad it made Dominic. but it was not his role to act on behalf of the world or deliver universal law. Perhaps their arrogance warranted this. emotionally or otherwise. All those things that were liked were no longer appreciated and all those things the couple did counted for nothing. He could not play one of the gods for he was their servant who was bold. are now just a lie. He warned those enemies to beware of their sniggering and malicious intent. No more. All those things spoke of. Dominic felt it was all one big lie and pretence. To Laura.
He referred to the source of minerals contained in the spa waters here and it is assumed also. They are not known. unfettered by authority at least until the Socialist party of Germany despatched this man west. the sniggers of a crowd reverberated in time to Dominic’s thought. it became ‘in vogue’ as a health resort from the 18th century onwards when the Hapsburg dynasty from Austria saw its potential for 37 . Some are famous for killing others or ruling divinely and unfairly. which are written on the walls. Freud frequented this place at a similar age as Dominic. like great men from history in search of a cure. Somehow it doesn’t matter why men arrive. it is only normal to have done so. Their connection to things we seek. we would not learn of the infinite wisdom contained in these ancient depictions of life. of course. King of Bohemia and accorded rights forthwith. this ability to make a difference in some way. they come from history. ‘great’ in terms of their notoriety and legacy they left us. a few years earlier. When Petr the Czar of Russia came here in 1711 what did the Czar find to compensate his soul or satisfy his instinct? The Emperor Josef had freed the city. were once ours too. one that took us all from an old one. Karlsbad. There were many ‘great men’ who came. in search of the key to unlock the mysteries of this life and to run through the depths of his confusion. both have their habit of curing men. Maybe they were introduced to the secret knowledge that gave them an edge and an insight. some for more creative reasons or even scientific. This opened the city to royal patronage and ensured it flourished as a place where the proletariat dared not to venture until at least the 20th century. Like all purveyors of knowledge and theory we must respect their position. The secrets. much of course we ignore now. What matters is that they shared or tried to share their moment. A city founded by Charles IV. If we chose to embrace it or. the ladies of the night. Sigmund Freud would have had his personal computer taken by special police in 2008 for his thoughts and writings on sexuality and investigated comprehensively. A new perspective was delivered. instead carried on looking towards the past. A hundred years ago.A Bohemian Fool He came to this city. But ‘great men’ always have to work within the confines of the society of the day that inflicts restrictions and limits their area of study. Freud must have struggled with all this thought and feeling and in Karlsbad must have contemplated a universal perspective. only the fact they did. It can only be respected. We are not party to know Freud’s movement or his ramblings of confusion. Freud sought a cure from his ailments brought on by a psychological condition it is suggested. Goethe the German poet came many times. but ‘great’ as we know them. as many as the new moons each year and stated that it offered him a whole new existence. in this city. despite finding an alternative one in future years based on their discoveries. Whether their thoughts are stuck in their time or transcend and bridge the change that follows is not important.
He may have met Hitler or Gurgarin in the middle of the 20th Century. visited here continuously until the invasions of Germany and Russia in the 20th century. is very much on the secondary list of destinations in Europe in the 21st Century. and despite its unique situation. Freud. The horse drawn carts that ferry tourists around the local destinations. complicit with his time. too many years was it inaccessible from the entire world. If all these great men came to this city. The contrast between the hideous buildings from the past 50 years. and the neat way they have been painted and restored in many pastel colours to resemble villas in the Mediterranean. The block concrete looks restored and alive after this transformation. this is so. or Wagner in the 19th Century. the city of health and knowledge had taken a downturn and a cover firmly placed over its prestige. Brahms. if the great lover did not come here. he would have liked to and this is enough to know. but as in all mythical tales. Rightly or wrongly. Here. is a fascinating one. Dominic could fantasise about a past life when he visited Karlovy Vary as a nobleman of standing linked to the orders of the day. The well connected and socially acceptable. until the budget airlines of Western Europe discover its airport on the hill. he thought. The men of Zimni would be as brief as a stranger chewing grass sitting in an empty field.Zdravi reflection and healing. The founder injured himself whilst hunting a stag and was cured miraculously by the rich waters here. he suspected. a mere possibility is sometimes sufficient. Dominic’s former colleagues of notoriety here would not have seen. From 1989 onward it tried to regain its former position in European standing but remains low in its influence and ranking. In turn the Soviets developed the city in their model and vision until 1989 and allowed certain more decadent aspects to deteriorate. men came and went. Dominic did not place himself on this high level of functionality.Chapter 5 . he protested. of which some now sit in a state of demolition. why would it not work for Dominic. Beethoven or Chopin in the 18th Century or Lizst. It’s quite a contrast and one. and the wonderful baroque and art nouveau elegance of the late 19th Century in the spa region. And so. that is. it is alleged. He could stroll along the Colonnade tipping his hat to Goethe. Half of a cure would be enough for him. The city is a combination of Soviet designed buildings. erected for merely functional reasons. He just wanted a cure from this monstrous debacle he lived with daily. so strong is the smell of the horses’ waste along the way. the legend describes to us this opening as it always does so elegantly. the local inhabitants insist upon this decadence after 38 . Marx. Casanova also visited. when the place was apparently opened up to all men. serve as a reminder of a past laced with possibility and hope. It is merely a tourist destination for the nouveau riche from Russia. But he would not want to meet the collection of movie stars who occasionally visited in modern times for the annual film festival.
the herd of the human race suffered. It was a famous place where he could only think of her. in fact and we always look to the possibility of more as humanity once again is always about to be put to the sword and culled. the Roman. He waited for Claudia here. Casino Royal. to the steep slopes of this valley. like the whole region has had a forgettable past in many ways. before this. their power was about to fade. it was not too cold this day. They had overseen much of Europe in this time before the First World War. the majority were German speakers for long periods of time. he thought. But this city had seen a constant foray of foreign speakers. a cable car took him further. The majority of Czech families residing in Karlovy Vary had only been living there for sixty years. It. every one. Dominic walked back to take in the atmosphere and the surrounding facade of housing that are now cafes. It was once part of a region known as Sudetenland. It was still only twenty years since the ‘Velvet Revolution’ when the Russians were finally seen to leave only to return in this city soon afterwards in another guise. It was then declared separate before the 2nd World War and part of a greater Germany. He wrestled with his anxieties and fears as once perhaps they did too? But surely they were greater than him. at a table outside the Elefant. The Grand Hotel Pup is at the end of the spa strip. As in all dynasties. It is this hotel built between 1896 and 1913 that epitomises this era. Dominic walked along the small river to its liaison with the forest. it was famous for the filming of a James Bond film. They say that they are ill mannered and do not act like gentlemen. he contemplated on simpler matters. their wealth diminish. Everything is above this point. theirs too was wiped out after yet another major slaughter of men in fields. The endless slaughter of men continues without reference. every empire. Czech’s were the minority in the area. As the aristocracy from the Austrian-Hungarian dynasty met in Karlsbad to conduct their social and cultural life. There exists a quiet dislike of the many Russians in Karlovy Vary by the local Czechs. where once intellectual men thought their famous thoughts and now it was Dominic that took his turn. designer shops with signs in Russian and hotels with rooms to let. killing fields. yet they had presided over a splendid set of monuments to mark their reign. the Ottoman. A merging of two grand halls and a fusing of ideas saw a grand entrance to a fine hotel and it is a wonderfully designed building by the two Austrian architects. The inscriptions and statues tell us a different story of a differing past. Fellner and Helmer. Dominic saw this on the way from Prague Airport. He sat outside. this small city. This is the premier location and houses the rich and established as it has always done since the golden period before the First World War. The ethnic cleansing which occurred after the end of hostilities was regrettable and although unsurprising. they spit in the street and are aggressive.A Bohemian Fool many years of suppression. It was surely only Dominic that couldn’t find a way to live 39 . once again. these men were calm and presentable at all times from dawn to dusk. He knew she would thrill at the sights of this city.
It was time to walk again. He needed to find somewhere soon. Some of which is liked and some of which is discarded. it had been fed a mixture of hate and organic fodder.Zdravi in this world with all its complexities and nonsense. which Claudia promised him. this place where his mind wandered and then thought only of Claudia. he looked for meaning he once knew so well. He could not deny he did. possibly with some hope in this world. detoxify its alcoholic content and disgust at its condition. maybe another day. Once things changed. this balance or amalgamation and acquiescence of ideas and thoughts were fraught with danger. Dominic continued to think in a depressed manner. He put posters up everywhere.Chapter 5 . It was true. those great men. He confused issues and made them one. he could not bring home. he wondered. pontificate on all matters prevalent to their banal lives with shadows hanging over their thought patterns as they struggled with a set of different circumstances? He finished with a question to himself. then he had failed in his task. So. so hopelessly dumped as a vehicle for his salvation and ultimate escape from rebirth. was wrapped up in this skin and bone as if he had been wrapped up in a fish shop. one that had elements of love and articles of hate. Dominic’s confusion. Dominic really missed Laura. 40 . It just had to be this way for some reason. He needed to try to translate it in a public place or hesitate again. He had to pay his bill at the Elefant Cafe. He was a seeker of truth. he outlined the day’s events with excuses for everything he somehow did wrong. A simple and pain free life of loneliness is surely better. but they were written in English and no one spoke this language. unbalanced and wasted had it become. He gave his note to the waitress who in turn gave him some change. Did they too. he missed her company and her child like laughter. punctuated with teaching and shopping for food and drinking to dull the aches and sore weary legs from walking. he presided over his lack of confidence. void of touch and human contact. If it was a temple he needed to honour. deprived of love for many years. like he. it did not matter Dominic thought that he needed to walk along the Tepla River and ask those men for some pointers or taste the foul tasting spa water from a ceramic cup to cleanse his body. whatever she brought and whatever she did. He walked and walked incessantly looking for himself or Laura or Claudia. promised her. commoner and not a purveyor of the knowledge. as he pushed harder and eventually through another door. It had been ransacked and allowed to fall into ruin like a neglected and resulting derelict building. The days merged into one long one. Dominic knew that Claudia failed to understand why he needed to go away and why he would eventually leave. he concluded. but not on this day. He held onto Laura’s memory in memory of her time with them all.
a travelling band of Romany people from Eastern Europe wrongly thought to have come from this region. Only traditionally shaped cups made from porcelain must be used. It was not true. This tale. you cannot take it home and bottle it. it is a ceremony and should be treated as so. but all the same. it housed five mineral springs to sample. He circled around the base camp and gazed longingly towards the summit. so much more. consumption must be taken place near the source. this place in Bohemia.A Bohemian Fool The oracles guided him to places he did not understand and they told him stories of men who felt but did not fare as he had. There are rules for sampling the water. some of them regarding the rich mineral content. no longer mattered. a grotesque and plain structure. built with Corinthian style columns in the 19th century. This contrast explains the eras that have passed though this small city. please do not water the plants with the constantly flowing mineral water from the ground. It is recommended the water only be consumed after consulting a physician. Dominic walked the path of the Mill Colonnade. and so described when it was built. Whether he considered himself Bohemian by nature or now by residence. These people were vilified in the extreme. and each way leads to the top one day. it is a region beset by its reputation as breeding non-conformists. quite like the stories we knew and new ones we were all about to hear. We could take a route up many sides of the mountain. of artists and intellectuals gathered to discuss in Dominic’s dreams their plans for future times. It is an unfounded one too. grey and square but nice inside. something that breeds the essence of a real connection. If only we can read through to the other side to where those with the esoteric knowledge sat and waited for our arrival. Another mythical tale perhaps. to ensure enough are sold and no smoking or drinking beer at the same time please! You must walk slowly. sensible ones perhaps. a thought and a pathway to take simultaneously. however. it means something more. an expensive one naturally. But in these chapters of our past there is something. he needed to find a new way this time. their pain and sorrow buried in Chateaus to be recovered by future men. No sharing with plants and animals please! 41 . A secret enlightenment stemming from a French perspective. He fell hard and fast and thought he could go on no more. Dominic wanted to aspire only as a man that was still alive. a place of letting go. and feel relaxed. Lastly. The word is short of its real meaning now. Their messages placed so intricately. It is not an appropriate building in this city. more rules which are ever more prevalent in this society. He lost oxygen and no longer could he breathe. its difference appeals as does the communist built Thermal Spa Sanatorium. It came from a different concept of design and thinking. it was liked this rule. each way has its hardships. But Dominic had fallen and taken injury.
in her sea green boat offshore.Chapter 5 . The petty and the mundane were not his home of thought until Laura took him there. where we are the asset. in the liquid that bequeaths his name. ride camels. to that place where little boys. Dominic was despatched comprehensively on arrival as Laura decided her future lay there. Being a traditional bohemian in the French definition. Dominic once again looked optimistically at this evidence and that he may too find a cure. It is where the majority are slaves to develop a city fit for capitalist kings. in fact three times to cure stomach disorders and liver problems had much success in terms of his health. 42 . we have to offer in terms of our labour. Dominic struggled with such things himself. Yet. The proletariat. People like their rituals and seemed to need them in this life. as peasants have no future to consider or ponder on. in fact ignored. in the rich waters of this spa town.Zdravi Everyone naturally adhered to these principles of recovery. Marx who came here with his daughter and sought a cure. as in the conversation in his dream was not discussed. a path they can follow. He wriggled to the degree of never wanting to conform to any rules as a rule in itself. we were once again among their ranks in Marx’s theory. It had no place in a city for god kings. to quicken their progress. His.
his Russian stranger could invite him to dinner at a famous hotel and bathe in carefully selected waters on request. honoured person of English speaking descent. how good it seemed to be. suddenly he had been summoned to meet later at six. Dominic’s status in this city. looking for a beautiful Russian stranger to take him home. Dominic continued walking. Dominic too remembered this well. It was a moment of excitement. Claudia told him to put her out at sea should her disorders take over her one day. the good days that he felt were real. The little cups have a touristy design with pictures of this small city. others have said this too. He could only see the times where he stood and said to himself. It seemed a strange request to Dominic whilst he marched along the pathways several thousand kilometres away. always on crushed ice. burn and scatter her were her orders. waiting for the next match. incarnate in waiting that had now exposed itself. one he had hoped for since last week. his lines and his eyes that have dropped. named and forever a souvenir. on and on. whatever our hopes and dreams might well be. Our positive feelings can also be illusions. She wanted to meet at a cocktail bar where the bartenders perform numerous tricks with bottles whilst they poured the blended liquid on ice. whatever our status in Marx’s vision. He watched others. Dominic could offer something. there would be a change of mind and a lessening of enthusiasm. But then he received a message from his German-speaking stranger. was a guest visitor. his loneliness 43 . man alive today. It is not part of our process to continue without pain and not be alone in this dark world. mostly older Russians religiously take water in their little ceramic cups with a pronounced lip to ease drinking and avoid burning their lips. was she too waiting for some sanity and sanctuary? Dominic had suspected and silicified this substance in his thinking and had taken it from the sandy deserts to the sulphur based geysers of this small city. What of Claudia. apart from proletariat. whilst he sat in Zimni. We must. a remembrance of days of health and good times. a potion not sweetened as in the many foodstuffs we consume. He had yet to find what it was he was looking for. But he was sure that once he was seen. perhaps? One look would be enough. it seems. he thought. He had to respect this position and use its possibilities to regain his real status as person personified. some knowledge and a spread of amusing anecdotes. She had witnessed a burial and it made her think about the day it would be her. sample some more of life. But these moments of brief happiness were never going to last. how good he felt.Voda Dominic was frightened to taste the water as he had heard it tasted awful.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 6 . no more than her friends. apart from the disorders he seemed to be afflicted by.
as if he had created his own downfall and if they listened to Laura. one day we would wake up to a confrontation. but it was true and she knew it too. he certainly didn’t know why. He knew that the world carried a potential to erupt at any time. Dominic’s depravity of Claudia’s touch pained him. He cooked and spoke with Claudia. he craved it. He knew. donated by students. Dominic’s dreams of karmic debt were unfounded and unlikely. to gain strength and find a reason to carry on. but when it had gone. There were many things that could not be expressed. For Laura it would never be like this. it would not have taken long either. it would be business as usual. He didn’t know how he had even arrived at this point. based on survival. He came home with cakes made with Czech flour and cream. bit-by-bit. There were external decisions and internal ones too which took Dominic through a mass of confusion. His language was all that was left. Dominic’s meeting was cancelled. he hoped one day their world would collapse. regardless of casualties and deserters to satisfy her avoidance of the bottom of the sky. He had at least decided this.Voda made him lonelier as each day passed. he found a reason she could understand or at least her tiredness forced her to agree with him. her entourage of strangers changed from year to year. but the purpose and the journey continued relentlessly. alone and unaided. she asked so many questions he had no answers to. it sounded cruel to even say. He was there for his health and nothing more. but you couldn’t stop this expedition to nowhere. The time difference took her deep into the night. It felt right. he was indeed totally responsible and a homosexual too 44 . Nice and sweet.Chapter 6 . it allowed only the slightest smile. Perhaps. He could tell how it tasted this rainy and miserable evening. in just a different way this time. They were immediately dismissed as lunatics. This solitude granted to Dominic by public decree would never be seen as acceptable by Claudia. He missed his old life. Dominic despised those who didn’t care. it cured his need to do something. The audience may change but the act remained the same. Dominic could not perform miracles to end this lonely stretch. Our freedom was evaporating little by little. but he could try as long as he didn’t mind failure. It was only going to come back again. he said. they were safe from retribution. He always sought to escape it. It took courage to face himself on a lonely night. but he knew she needed answers so he tried to fulfil her request. it took a hopeless situation to make him real again. A new order was delivered without consultation. and dumped upon his mortal soul. Then people’s values would suddenly change as different priorities would stare down on us all and this was exactly what happened to Dominic. Dominic was deemed unstable and unreliable by his peers. After an hour or two. misery and hate. when the system had finally collapsed. and fail to not go home. which he could teach or sit opposite a cynical woman of age. to move to Karlsbad. Others had written and hinted negative things about the world. he knew.
consequently. The Second World War’s destruction produced the need for rapidly constructed buildings to replace the rubble. young couples kiss as they smoke cigarettes. as many movie stars had. It is nice inside and the rooms are set into the steep valley but resemble a tower block seen anywhere in major cities of Europe. However. it has housed in its windows. Becherovka. but they stayed somewhere else. where the sheep congregate in their poverty. a mass production and all the same. which was not rendered and left in its pure form. Restaurants in Karlsbad show pictures in their windows of Hollywood personnel dining inside. when mass housing was produced for the proletariat or working class in Western Europe. but it was pleasant to the eye. since the ‘velvet revolution’. Czech men neatly arranged the sale items with their hair tied in varying lengths 45 . ‘De Niro’ and ‘De Vito’ had visited. There were pictures of Gentlemen and Royalty and lute playing jesters in many colours on canvas scribed in oil. fur coats for Russian tourists at extraordinary prices by local standards. but he forgot to consider its rounded front and prestige. he thought. It was a building he described as ugly. medicinal drink and hand painted pictures of the small city often by Vietnamese vendors. restaurants and exclusive shops. which is a strong alcoholic. They operate the many small shops and market stalls as new migrants always do. In the park there were painters selling sketches of fine imagery and colour. Why the Soviets built a prestigious hotel complex in this style is baffling to the western visitor. as young people do. Dominic walked again across the river to the steam of the spa area of the small city. He looked down at those who were selfish and did not care about his fate. You can hear the horses hooves clattering on cobbled streets as the procession of tourists continue daily from Hotel Pup to Post Office Square along the narrow stream and back again. This building is thought highly of in Karlovy Vary and is used for the annual film festival. A depiction of this city. They came to this country in a cultural exchange in the communist days and stayed. was reminiscent of the same 1970’s design utilised all over Europe. merged in pastel shades. but being right about anything made little difference to things. this small city. On this issue he was right.A Bohemian Fool to add to a list of reasons for his social downward spiral. Dominic was angry. wafers. for viewing and the awards ceremony. The mentality of Laura was in question with this accusation. men had murdered for less. for the suitably impressed. as she suggested his lack of loyalty was due to his love of men. After this. which contains a hotel. He took the route past the Thermal building. albeit a tapestry of very cheap items. The different sizes suggested an offering perhaps aimed at the tourist. is the park. the block concrete. Outside there are a handful of market stalls selling the local specialities.
but the city’s history. from another era and its facade a very civilised one. but they were all at their cruising altitude. burning the lid of the eye he sought to cure. but the water was hot. Crowns and other currencies. Dominic lifted his head high to view the jet streams above. It seemed Dominic chose not to. during and of course after there were always opportunities to change the outcome. many of them.Chapter 6 . women who resembled fashion models were the staff. double in fact compared to the other cafes. Dominic drank his coffee. He thought that at any moment he could have stopped this process. Dominic waited for his coffee. ones that were out of financial reach for local Czechs. not much Czech was needed. The prices matched the splendour. but never did. He was not brave enough. This led to his permanent indifference with the many things he discovered. something didn’t allow him to. He sought inspiration. The sky was painted with their white lines as they breezed over Central Europe. 46 . its tables were neatly laid out and their multi lingual staff were taking orders in Spanish. 60C and it surprised him. The clothes were designer labels and of good quality. Instead he bathed his eye. On either side of the river after the park were small boutique style shops. This level of freedom was intensely terrifying for someone who had been supported for so long. as if he needed to suffer some intense pain. it took some time and he started to think about things again. this time about the past. A golden elephant sits above this old fashioned of places. A woman gesticulated in front of him to illustrate a point at a much older man who sat with her. But to keep the company of such great men. charged in Euros. Dominic returned to the famous Elefant cafe.Voda of ponytails. A hopeful feeling to take him away from this restrictive life we were all compelled to live. not his. They lured in men who are susceptible to the look and the thought of possibility. It was a pleasant walk and wonderful for window-shopping. German and English. They offered expensive clothes and jewellery. Dominic thought many times he ought to buy something. The pictures were so striking. as if he just didn’t have the energy anymore to face another drama. It was a visitor to Karlovy Vary that once said. Dominic could not afford anything on this street and after many years of affluence this pained him. He thought about the water in the spa district. many planes flew over this airspace. He would not be held to a mundane level. He assumed that he needed to free himself from this final restraint and although his life was significantly tougher. he hoped. Dominic expected to pay more. The personal demise of Dominic was not a short journey. Dominic was burnt out. He wanted to try to drink some to clear his mind and detox his heart. he no longer was required to deal with public arguments or rudeness and more importantly he no longer had any limits on his growth. the sales pitch less so. He could learn to fly again without fear and loathing. mentally. Its decor. before. which was not in any way remarkable and wondered again.
A Bohemian Fool that none of us are more enslaved than those who believe they are free. who were instrumental in spreading this vision. It featured the turning of one era into another and on the basis of this. every road heads in her humble direction. Jesus signified the current age of Pisces to those who were initiated. We are economically. was Dominic’s lover again in his heart. Dominic felt or saw nothing spiritual in there. Her tears that flood the Nile were his to nourish him and end his everlasting wandering. it was so far beyond our normal concept of things. How we love her. they had been collecting gold for centuries. Its content had real meaning. We worship her as our mother and wife and giver of life. the queen of our heart. He had not seen its negative effect yet. Dominic went to the church of Mary Magdalene. for us. we believed we lived in a democratic society. morally and physically dependent on a system we have little control of. it was layered with gold and offered promises of salvation to the needy. but things were awakening slowly. It was merely a perception. This deity of love led Dominic to believe falsely to trust in things that were not real and also accept false ideals and dreams. Things always remind us of Isis. Sadly. of Isis. in truth there was little difference. socially. Dominic wanted to be her lover again and follow her. she had a kind heart. they turned its representative into an organised cult with a deity to worship. Billed as the path. he hoped. Dominic’s ‘zeitgeist’ was truly a spirit of his time. we did not. who Dominic had searched for all his life. they were just another collection of intellectual illusions that built upon his confusion. She allowed his tears to flow into hers. lover of nature and patron of magic. we thought we were free. it seemed dream like. Isis. in the past. guarded the altar. It was her. it was obvious they were enslaved to a system as their movement and even their opinions were restricted. But 47 . a heart that opened up to him. But in the west. The east was presented as negative and the west as the only way to live. It’s a testament to this religion that its place of worship occupies a spot half way up the slope high above the river. The healing and the hope would stem from there. This was a cruel thing to do to the human race. especially now as he felt the full force of surviving alone. We are all enslaved without knowing we are. Pictures of zodiac signs filled the interior. he believed. He had resisted running back to Claudia. sculptured in strange forms. In a country like Czech. the Elefant cafe offered more insight. there was nothing about two parties changing places and ensuring they adhered to another agenda set by those not elected. It was never realised what was truly happening to us all. which were not his. Laura was a poor substitute for his queen. Statues of early Christians. but the real worth lay inside. Dominic looked for threads to link these feelings and the small city he now resided in. it was clear in Dominic’s mind. Everything leads us to her.
she would come. they took this and used it to progress their field of knowledge to a higher level and further the causes of those who rule this earth.Voda these great men were blessed with more knowledge than Dominic had ever known. it was another wicked trick. to be damaged by your parents is the worst thing of all. braided hair. her only son. putting the responsibility solely on him. and there was nothing mystical to speak of. He had no aspirations. It acted as an agent. he couldn’t take the responsibility alone. They failed him. this confused him further. Now he was alone and no one cared too much. for a journey far away. Dominic felt so sad for him. They were given a proper education to understand real concepts.Chapter 6 . It was a positive thought and although sounding nothing much. a watershed that took Dominic away from his absolute negativity. They knew of the symbols and the signs to follow. which looked so natural. sent to his sisters with no home and little hope. the universe. They were no different this grey and dark day. and the falsehoods. It was his romantic thought for this day. She tried her best to fool him with tales of deception. she didn’t want anything to do with him anymore either. Dominic felt overwhelmed by clones and drones with their illustrated mimes. He saw a beautiful young girl. He was a lost soul. who sold us things we didn’t need and averted our right to this earth. he was alone now. so scared was he to Czech. still destroying things and putting us to the sword. 48 . One that had been played on Dominic previously. His mother had betrayed him repeatedly. Dominic felt so bad about doing this to his son. but it demonstrated to Dominic that life could be better and life could carry on. she had discarded him. From the doldrums of misery came some sunshine. Laura’s thoughts rested solely with her surrogate son. she had abandoned him. whoever those puppeteers were? Dominic knew his logical mind perceived this. still manipulating things. Nevertheless the signs were there in terms of the likelihood of change. typical of ones we often have which go as quickly as it arrives. not even to himself. first we had to take it away from them. Laura said she would join their son. conditional to other things perhaps. he never understood what was happening. It was hard for Dominic to evaluate this process that destroyed his family. our place. but he couldn’t do it without her. Now the boy had to fend for himself. Laura first and then him. that he had endured. It could lead to another place. it was nothing more than a thought really. We needed to take this power and reinvest it in ourselves. was significant. They had done this for thousands of years in many guises it seemed and still it terrified us. but she never meant it. it was just a good for him to see. She said if he wanted her to. no sources needed. The words were written by those who disconnected us from our souls. of no use to anyone. he had to run. There was so much pain and sorrow. He had been sucked into the abyss and he had no one to speak with about it. to sense a young soul in case he wanted to take this soul somewhere with him.
a war against our souls and then a war against our physical bodies. Dominic fed her reasons to alleviate her guilt in their constant arguments. He could be who he was. but it mattered little. what was the need to feed them from birth until their death with trivia and no reason for hope. not the braided blond. as the cocktails were composed. she used everything she could think of. what he said or who was there. there was to be no more attention from her. We were alone in this world. Perhaps. he tried to make her feel comfortable with what she had done. He held a whisky in one hand and smoked a cigarette in the other. as the Piscean age of war continued unabated. they fed us chemical cocktails and suggested cutting our skin to solve every problem. she said. except him. We had seen the reasons for this.A Bohemian Fool Dominic was starting to believe in himself again little by little. He invented stories to fit the order of her new wave of reason. he was still standing. He also made a great effort to confuse her. However. the children were gone. Laura said he was a drunk. He saw the turning of bottles and twisting. He was higher than this in the order of things. Dominic confessed to befriending a whisky bottle. Then there was a concept of debt and our enslavement to pay off this debt for our entire lives. despite numerous glasses of whisky. He looked for no excuses. he poured out more stories that were larger than life to try to confuse her. he tried all his skills and techniques. The medicine took away some of his pain. as he lived them and took responsibility for them. So what did he want? Not a cocktail. but the method was embarrassing and was fitting only in a circus especially when no one was watching. but reverberated inside of him dampening any hope of recovery. The showers and quotes that washed over him were not related to him. Dominic didn’t know why. he would like Laura to walk through the door. they passed through him. It deprived us of our reason to understand. Education was devised to fill us with disinformation. but no one ever explained why there was a need to oppress the people of this world. He really was. but some people were impressed. in her eyes. Dominic had started to believe this. and it sounded a bizarre thing to do. yet she knew he was not one before and therefore if he was and this had changed. a small place in a residential area. despite all the meandering moments. he didn’t know what to do. Religion kept us from spirituality. it totally destroyed Dominic. hopefully and finally. Lawyers ensured there was no justice and governments took our freedoms away. her family was history. while she was not of course. as a weapon of destruction. The results were good. It was successful. He sat in his local bar. There was a war being staged on our minds. there was some evidence to suggest it was true in his disturbed mind. then how did this change? This didn’t matter in the new order of things. he believed that he had lost his ability to understand and his way. Doctors made our health worse. but it was a time to wake up in this age. A 49 . no. as it really didn’t matter anymore how he looked.
its snow would fall and its wind would chill. Her ambitions were solitary. Laura delivered a new world order one day. Perhaps it was already here without a clear picture. before the days of the drug cartels shipping their wicked potions to cure our problems. if only I had not done this and that. upon a whim. that special water that could cleanse his body. It meant there were less people and perhaps this time he thought. we can see it’s based on the same principle as the war on our soul. He was now in the company of a Georgian sky goddess who held his hand and if she would enslave him. Dominic went. thus creating new ones. The rain didn’t affect the flow of people and the queues for god’s healing springs were their normal length. Dominic had managed to survive so far. then he would cry no more. he might find the courage to try the water. but these were from the past. on a notion and left them all struggling and then she blamed them all for them failing to recover. one had arrived and the other was yet to follow. The ‘mill spring’ was the one he wanted to taste. They were different then perhaps. she could bring him back to summer again by capturing his heart. It was never just Laura and Dominic. He knew she controlled the seasons of our souls. Dominic knew. together scheming and plotting to last another moment. instead they all wore hats. so he likened her to this mythical woman. Laura remained on a crusade. like the famous ones of the 12th century. The tourists didn’t carry umbrellas. as a morning star. words he needed to express about these false feelings. There were always tasks he had to do. Within this context.Chapter 6 . Dominic had no regrets. The one recommended by the doctors who had procrastinated about health. He would adhere to her instructions.” Dominic spoke out loudly to himself. those strange men. once again. let alone a day. who could take us to hell and back in a moment. But everyone had a good time in the process until the latest one failed to include the family. upon a smile. Both were coming. he managed to last 47 years with the help of others. hers were as ill founded and equally as unsuccessful. The great celebrations were for abject failures. upon a whim. it was raining this time. he had taken collateral damage along the way. this war on our soul. “If only I was brave enough to taste. Claudia didn’t come from Georgia but descended from close by. and it was too hard alone. if there were no conditions there would be no problems. but no one bothered too much about this. The aggressor always blames the victim as the cause of their actions in world and personal terms. not under the wing of the new world order. 50 . to the spa area of this small city. he could not survive unaided.Voda system so delicately balanced it ensured we never progressed as our value was constantly eroded. We can see this manipulated reality given to us. so certainly Dominic didn’t complain. Should he escape and winter arrive. as it sat invisibly waiting to be revealed.
He knew he existed and not just in his mind. Dominic wondered if he was being followed today by his double. This. could apply here. and he knew he had to find him to free himself from him and himself. forced himself to taste it afterwards. He knew that he had followed him here to this small city and had tested his resolve previously. He walked on down the river over a bridge to the other side. He knew he was there somewhere. but there were none and no immediate impact from the water either. He waited for its hallucinogenic properties to kick in. He looked behind and around for signs. and back and he tried the water from the famous ‘Mill Spring’. 51 . The cliché that everything that tastes bad. so he bathed his eye again. He stopped off at the outlet named ‘Trzni’. He wanted to capture him and extinguish his influence. finally.A Bohemian Fool Dominic’s mind started to race with too much information flowing through its unknown matter. although slightly cooler. He then. is good for you. and it was surprisingly good. it was too hot to drink initially. he was looking for his Doppelganger. ‘Market Spring’ and sampled its content. as this did not taste anything other than putrid. 56C. ‘Mlynsky’. did not taste as nice.
She was not a descendant of Isis. but he felt exposed and vulnerable. How Dominic longed to gain more knowledge and therefore more understanding in this lifetime. It was a welcome response. but now he walked along quite happily. he had to kiss the mother of all eternity. 52 . Her large breasts hung over his glass as it was placed on the table with an accompanying odour of labour. Another wench served him a Weiss beer. but conditioning and not understanding the world we live in. Soon he would take a bottle of spring water and fill up for the long journey ahead.Rodina Chapter 7 . too easily. the questions in each phone call became harder to respond to. Dominic wanted to be with Claudia. They could bridge this gap of loneliness if they tried. When he considered how much he had hidden himself. he realised that although it was always safe. He could not be blamed for creating the storm. he bounced along the promenade and then Laura phoned and he ignored her for the first time. she asked him many questions. ones that were hard to answer. who tapped phone calls and intercepted messages. they knew he assembled his meaning from sources not close to their own. But after. and a hopeful beginning reigned over him. her body and his together. Laura was still able to knock him off his path. It was a signal to end a particular phase. she was not a Georgian goddess. The ring closed in. He was a free man as Claudia pointed out. Dominic caught a falling brown leaf from a tree in the palm of his hand whilst walking at pace. Claudia told him that she wanted him to come back to her. but so clear. The boat sailed on choppy waters until Dominic and Laura finally ran aground and she blamed him for this loss of control. there was no calm. Dominic waited for the gods to take him from this place and bring him back to the summer of his life. away from her miseries and denial. It would be enough for this long ride he was undertaking. he was here without his angel to watch over him. he thought. he thought. Dominic was only her lover. he concluded. It was not distance. no one was watching him. without his double to terrorise him.Rodina Laura had become connected to self appointed royalty and their secret service entourage. Dominic suspected he was being monitored as this was something she once said. so cloudy. He knew it was a sign of his forgiveness.Chapter 7 . It was all these things in this world that kept them apart. They knew who he was. they knew he would not give up. Winter was looming. around the mind of lonely Dominic. his dreamtime story. she would take him away from his purpose. After this and yet one more day of confusion. the sky displayed its differing colour. like a Cockatoo on a tree in Australia. and to be comfortable as a solitary figure. hold her in his arms. his paranoia surfaced this day. Dominic spoke to Claudia on the phone. this was always her contribution.
Dominic had always thought along these lines himself. in that. no more than the instruments of social control. this time by another woman as men frequently are. as described. Laura to ignore them. Not being ritualistic in his actions Dominic decided to change his plans. Tony called and it seemed that the pain was taking over his mind. In Czech. It made a real change to hear something not negative as he had become. He had plans to take the walk again. his misery and talked up his future. We knew that awareness of all things was important and the slave camp we all lived in together in our ignorance needed to be understood. if he had it. it was raining again. denouncing his relationship with Laura and then quoted a ‘bucket list’ of priorities he needed to see out before he died. He could not ease his own suffering. he knew he was being mesmerised again. however one of them had a more positive take. who really serve the hidden leaders of this world and the interests of those we do not know. there had been Austrians replaced by Germans replaced by Russians and for the last few years a local regime that must still bow to their masters in one form or another. His loneliness was too great. the whole world was being synchronised. at the top. he said. he said. despite their President’s reluctance. as it had become hard to imagine any future alone. they light a multitude of fireworks. However. to stop it. No matter how anyone tried. always another tyrannous regime replaces the previous one before it. the police. is true in all democracies. He stayed in watching various Internet movies mostly about the many conspiracy theories that currently existed in the world. The monetary system was one that could not be negotiated. it could. The phrase about elections. He thought there might be some event or public display of national fervour. The government. they do not serve our interests. But 53 . Unless. but he insisted on talking about Dominic. the debt would always be outstanding to someone. It was Czech Independence Day. Dominic was on this list. a new ritual had been born: one that required him to get wet on this public holiday to taste the holy water. The consistency of policy around the globe had been the most notable thing. He hoped it would work out for them. no one ever suggested answers. there is not freedom. he got this notion from some Hollywood movie. But. tuned in on the same frequency. all debt was one day just wiped on a computer screen. he chose like. His lack of independence made him too needy. they just needed to dream in time. He knew there were issues with Claudia. but it seemed whatever had been planned would be damp.A Bohemian Fool It excited him as he could see something ahead for him. this was abundantly clear. this was kind for a man who was clearly dying to think this way. it talked about an alternative to the monetary system we all lived by. but for Dominic this was meaningless and he understood little of this. In Australia. Tony would give him whatever it took. as they were as dreamy as each other. whoever wins the Government still gets in.
Laura ended up helping him. Laura helped him and vilified him at the same time. From the slaughter came those who survived long enough to be punished for doing so. seemed to have an effect. Dominic iced it like the Australian he had become and it burst over his cheek and the lump went away. It was all madness. Tony said that he loved his friends and Dominic was one of these. the street names all ended in Strasse. Dominic was taken to a place not far from here by a Czech couple. A sign that said ‘Egerland’ hung on the wall above the bar. the pretty girl in the bar he felt some attraction to and now some relief from his swollen eye. It mattered little why. but she still helped him. He had no money now and it was hard to facilitate this trip. he would accept his lucky break. The spring water he had bathed his swollen eye in. But this empowered her and it had to stop. but their nation lost the war and so they had no official rights. The German bar had a map on the toilet wall of Karlsbad in 1923. everything. Dominic didn’t feel like the ‘one eyed’ Cyclops anymore. It was his second visit to this German pub. It brought him happiness when Dominic went to see him. How lucky he felt. self help was not something Dominic believed in. Now there is Moscow Street remaining where the police station is and not a German street name in sight. and blur his vision. Their claim to ill treatment and theft was as legitimate as the rest around Europe. He didn’t know if it was the water from the spring.Chapter 7 . Despite Dominic’s zero knowledge of Czech he 54 . Laura’s incoherent response confused him. a genuine alternative to modern medicine. written in old-fashioned Gothic script. The bar had pictures and stuffed animals and beer mugs hanging from the ceiling. he waited for it to resurface. First. it was his favourite cloudy beer. Regardless.Rodina he thought of many reasons to stay alive. paying for a hotel. it was a wonderful feeling. It was strange how suddenly it all changed. highly significant. two applications was not much. descendants and members of a group of displaced Germans. the lump increased in size and wanted to explode. but there didn’t need to be any. There were many disgruntled old people. but it never did. Dominic drank ‘Weiss bier’. Dominic abused her in response. but he wasn’t going to ask questions. The simplistic moments were in Dominic’s mind. now there was just a small matter of calming a disturbed mind and raging bronchitis in his left lung. The meaning ‘be with God’ was an old one. The German’s suffered greatly too in this time. he hadn’t seen him for some time. the language and the names that were eradicated and replaced and this is an analogy of how Dominic’s life had also switched with ease. There was a gas lamp on the wall and a horseshoe too. They were kind and polite people but their relationship seemed strained constantly by differing requirements. He no longer needed the operation that the doctor had recommended in Perth earlier that year and he had navigated his first hurdle of sickness.
They spoke of visiting Australia one day and had aspirations to move there. where we are now. and was looked after in a loving 55 . or some coded version of something else perhaps? However. on his return to Australia. Dominic was left in an empty house with his son. He left mementos that could not be removed by anyone. it is perceived. Dominic’s daughter became ill. inside this 13th century box were bones of men. The men from our past honoured their inherited knowledge in the form of some breathtaking work and left us all with a guide on churches and relics such as this. Their words no longer meant anything and their tears were ignored. it was a classic relationship and made more interesting to observe without the benefit of language. They were indelibly stamped on his heart. Laura betrayed her only son without a thought for his feelings. they were wonderful to him during his stay in Karlovy Vary. The symbolism was striking. but this box was rich in messages and rich to all eyes. Her new man must have told her pretty lies. it had been hidden in some post world war two escape and restored to faith and low light. He suggested that he should tell the Emirates police authorities about this relationship. She looked on and didn’t care anymore for him. as it was illegal there. A lifelong commitment was broken that night. as it seemed to free them up to battle out this war regardless of the fact that Dominic was with them. he lost everything in the same way. He settled for a while with Dominic’s daughter. One barmy night in Dubai. The symbolism we ignore from day to day still glows without gold. She insisted on controlling him and he resisted this control but took the benefits. He had to create his own and he was too young to do so. her daughter or Dominic. it was a bright sunny day. another clue as to this mystery there was little understanding of? This is the story of evolution from plant to the fourth incarnation. to do such a thing. However. He longed for his home and security to be returned. men who had delivered early Christianity to the world. Instantly he took their places.A Bohemian Fool understood perfectly their arguments and her requests for attention. he wrote on her walls with ink and paint and scratched her doors and cupboards with words explaining how he felt. the son and Dominic. but this would never happen. Dominic saw a golden casket. he was mailed from there like a ‘DHL’ parcel as he threatened her array of lies. They drank beer incessantly together and always at the Czech couple’s expense. he wanted to punch this man. Dominic had a daughter who lived with her friend and his son was forced to join them when Dominic and his son were made homeless. reputedly. as was the value to this world. So exposed. She destroyed a decent life that night and guaranteed a lifetime of misery and difficulty for her son. Dominic’s son became angry and wanted to hurt others in response to being hurt so cruelly by his mum. It was a Saturday when Marek took Dominic to a chateau fifteen kilometres from home. the box glittered and had carvings that depicted their lives.
They were history and despite some funding of their lives through debt and many illegal deals. Her stupidity and selfishness came to the forefront of everyone’s mind.Rodina way. he was alone and he could not save his son or his daughter from the monstrous beast. He instead created a few possibilities and allowed them to happen without intervention. He had allowed her too much power and she abused it to its maximum. always. She met the two homeless people. It’s not as if he had made plans as he had in other times when he had tried to leave. as if she was a commodity. He loved them both but could not help them to survive. she didn’t kiss them goodbye. It was known that he was precise about the things he said but it was also known that no one could do anything to change this. as he was too tired to sit through another episode. Dominic ignored her act. it would have been easier on all of them. he trudged aimlessly for months. Dominic and their son in her arrogant manner at Dubai airport. although this was impossible at the time. but not in this destructive way and he allowed a set of circumstances to flow. He could not have predicted such things after a quarter of a century with her. With nothing. She had no problem walking away after 20 years of their daughter’s life. He had seen them all before. it was what he had wanted too. which was kind. She had decided they no longer mattered as the new boy counted more. Laura said that he had handed her on a plate to the new boy. but they were extracted and dumped as if they were not of any use to her cause and this made their hearts weep. It was too late. there were lies and she made up stories. it was time to seek some peace. lost and deposed. there was the occasional moment where she actually thought of them. but she terrorised all of the family for months and months afterwards. He felt some security after Laura abandoned him to the wolves. in her dismissive and deeply deceitful style. Dominic could say nothing and he always felt he was to blame. Dominic cried as much for him and his daughter as he did for himself as he could create another life. The new boy was so young he could have been her new son. He knew where it was heading. but in his heart despite his terrible misgivings and fear. But when the reality came crashing on his head he couldn’t cope with its ferocity or its intense destructive power. and if she had been accidentally killed in a car. They could have accepted that this life that was hers was done.Chapter 7 . He was made to feel this way by Laura who cited a multitude of reasons for her action. 56 . She couldn’t be honest or look any of them in the face. He was powerless as she controlled them all and sent the ship sinking into the depths of the ocean whilst she hitched a ride in a speedboat. The daughter tried to help Dominic in the best way possible but even she got tired of his misery. She had gained a new audience who applauded her performance that her family no longer wanted to see. the unit and group were amalgamated only by birth and no longer by friendship and hope.
Dominic was in Karlovy Vary. there were some serious situations that Laura and he had narrowly escaped with her skills. When you are raised in a broken family and sent to a home aged six. Their daughter found a new way. She was like a manipulative government who created problems and then claimed superiority in solving them. you constantly seek repair in some way or other. he utilised hers to function in this world. If. It was so bitter and abusive. but he was always better off without it. It has not been split or damaged and requires no repair. She created something and destroyed it as if she was the only one with power. so desperate was she to be rid of them. reflecting on a period of time where everything was lost and everything was regained. It 57 .A Bohemian Fool which under the circumstances was weird and demonstrated that her madness was complete. But even her power was limited. They had been forced to go there after losing their home in Perth. The cleansing that followed although painful was a separation that could not be avoided. run away from her life. and this war of the gods would surely continue another time. Without a flinch she met outside a shopping mall. but he became weary and the last time there was a problem was the last time for him. Her frigid and embarrassed attitude to sex told him this. if you have been hurt. that is pure with love. It handed over her adult life to danger and she needed to run. He was sure there was also some sexual impropriety or abuse present in this family. He would not join her again. He was not in competition with her for power. As an adult. despite motivation that might be misguided. One day she would surely find an equal match and she would be exposed as Dominic revealed her dark secrets to her adversaries. there was not a chance it could be repaired. Dominic never needed this kind of power. you can live with yourself and anyone else as you have a grounded and stable mind. She created a mess only to fix it again soon after. alone. it is most likely in this environment. He was hopeful he could also find some golden treasure and his daughter could build her own. Dominic sought to heal her wounds. It was terribly misguided. which resurface at any given time. one of Dubai’s many personal drivers and collected a classic brown paper bag from the servant of a rich princess in exchange for answers to a forthcoming exam. She took cash for questions and answers before an exam at a university. herself and eventually even her own family. and their son began to seek a path to satisfy his soul. it builds in future problems. This funded the abrupt departure of Dominic and his son. He had not always done this successfully. like Dominic you are blessed with stability. Dominic felt responsible for not managing her madness as he had done for many years. The violence and the fighting plus the many events Dominic never knew about.
they could escape a lifetime seeking her in her many forms. his delusions were total and complete. his daughter’s was inside her heart. her kind heart. It was not a trip for travellers. But this is to be expected. This only left separation and sanity as the two things he could hope to gain. but she was now a friend who wanted to travel with him. His daughter was happy when he discussed her life in every little way. He looked for nothing here. for this would be a legacy of great haste and sadness. they remained within him. But they didn’t need to be this way and Dominic hoped they wouldn’t need to copy her. she said it in many ways. as now it was time. the inner essence of his mind. But they would find their Karlovy Vary as Dominic eventually found his. There was no meaning there to be found as the answers were not there. They stopped growing and stayed at the age when the storms first came. But he had some support and it came in the form of Claudia. The children had not been damaged until this time. His was not there but somewhere else. as he had to find a way without knowing where to start. as the Tibetans say. it represented his past. He had deliberated and pontificated. he didn’t want to hear the harsh things Dominic had to say. He had cried at the loss of his samsara. He thought only momentarily as he recalled a desire in a passing glance. They had heard enough from the jesters and the fools. She. His daughter had to find a new way soon. He relaxed when he discussed sport or some social activity.Rodina would all take time. he knew and he hoped it would require no pain. no lovers. A realisation of what was happening to him. however as there was no place to 58 . He grasped at this loss despite knowing he needed to wish them goodbye. Dominic thought his son was settling down again. but what it did for them was to put their life on hold. He no longer needed to plot or chase every woman in case she was Isis as she was most definitely not. Dominic’s son spoke so differently after. Dominic went to this small city in little pieces fresh from a brawl that had spanned continents and oceans with no solutions. Dominic had to seek out his rigpa. the difficulty of being young. He could see a way to gain some peace and understanding. as if he already knew. He knew she might not want to go all the way. He had to go deeper into this and himself. not just about his family disaster but everything. They both have had too much sorrow in that year. He hoped Claudia could come on this journey. Laura delivered the opposite of love. then promptly discovered her carnal world. it worked on so many different levels. He had found some space to answer some questions in his mind. a hideous introduction to the tainted world of the damaged soul. whom he recognised immediately when he first saw her as someone he would know.Chapter 7 . after he had a relapse and forgot himself. as it opened up all the questions. protecting himself from the words that came his way. too much and were too young to bear it.
A Bohemian Fool
call a destination. But this is what he saw in her on the fields of Western Australia. In between shouting and encouraging players in a game, he found time for her, he knew her. He saw a new family of many thousand people who would surround them and give to them from far and near. He saw many things he could not even describe. He saw a retreat from everything and all their fears would decrease, as would their tears. He didn’t know if she could come on this journey, maybe she needed permission from someone, but it promised to be an interesting one. When Dominic met Claudia, he saw a new pathway, which went in a forward direction, and he followed it in his subtle way, but when it came first to him he didn’t know what to say. He had become so complacent and so secure with someone like Laura, he even thought he loved her. But this was crazy as he had plotted and schemed to get away from her for too many years. It was his chance to escape, the gates had been opened but Dominic stayed inside the cage too frightened to leave and he waved at Claudia and kissed her. But when the great storm came in response, it blew the cage away and into the wilderness. Claudia caught his hand and guided him but Dominic was so confused, so totally lost without his mad world. Tony phoned at night in penetrating agony once more in disbelief at the misery that illness and pending death brings. He said much about Claudia, and how she must care for Dominic and give him some peace. Tony wanted some harmony when he left this world and he wanted to know that all the things he ever did were not in vain. “Those who are left behind must be secure and comfortable.” He stated. Tony had never met Claudia, but there is sometimes a knowledge that surpasses what could be known, he uttered. There was some knowledge of Dominic and his life and the dreams he aspired to and wanted to know. A dying man may know more than we allow or want to know. But Tony wanted to say something to those who were willing to listen. Dominic was someone who would listen. Many men produce their greatest work before they die, Tony was not one of these, but he still had something worth listening to. Tony was not Kieslowski, the Polish filmmaker. Dominic had never met anyone of this standing, not even in Karlovy Vary. The family is a large group and full of many important people. It does not just comprise of blood relations, we are from a larger unit, one, which takes in all those who feel the way we do. When a man so isolated and with no reason to live is calling, we know he is part of our clan. We know he needs to be taken in and cared for in any way we can, by text, in person or by voice. It is important to know someone cares for us. We must create a network of those who see the issues the way we do. Tony said Dominic and Claudia would fit together and one day when Dominic returned to Australia this love would explode on him and then he would find his peace. The knowledge he gave was as if, it had come from an oracle. Does impending death bring spiritual insight? Dominic said, “and if you were wrong, what would I do?” Tony said that he would not know
Chapter 7 - Rodina
it, and Dominic could say that Tony knew nothing! But Dominic doubted and wondered if he was wrong, but somehow it rang true, perhaps because he needed it to be. He came slowly towards a resolution and his unconditional offerings could bring much to this world. Dominic thought they would have a difficult time, as circumstances would conspire against them again. But he would provide the security Claudia had no idea he could give with insight and love. Tony knew that Dominic needed it to work. Dominic had lost touch with many people that he knew, so many in fact, he had virtually no one to call on when this crisis he promoted came one day to his house. He didn’t always relate to others well, he could not subscribe to their view of the world they lived in. He didn’t see life the way they did. He didn’t care about money or houses. He didn’t want to own anything outright; he felt he was only a caretaker of this planet, not its owner. He didn’t care for any profession or a title to share at parties, if he went to one. Who was he, many people said this, he was under suspicion, but he knew who he was, “I am a particle that makes up the whole. I am everything. You can see me if you want to be dancing about in the snow, my snow. Straining my eyes in the sun. Feeling the earth beneath my feet. It’s me who does these things as they are mine.” Dominic’s stoned monologue of his life on earth seemed an old fashioned one in most people’s fixed eyes. Many sniggered behind this fools back. This didn’t bother him much, it no longer mattered what others said about him, he was finally free from all that supposition.
A Bohemian Fool
Chapter 8 - Penize
Dominic’s illness took him downward to places he didn’t want to go. It was very hard being sick and being alone simultaneously. No one would have known if he had died in Karlovy Vary, one lonely night. Until perhaps, he didn’t appear for work, then he would have been unceremoniously dragged out, down the four flights of stairs on a stretcher unable to tell them what was wrong even if he had clung onto life. It was perhaps a silly thing to consider and not even likely, but one Dominic suddenly cared about as many others suddenly didn’t want to know him anymore when she took off from the house. Laura’s propaganda sufficient, to ensure her version was taken as the truth. As if it was Dominic that sent Laura away, he didn’t stop her, but he didn’t force her either. No one likes to get too involved with others in case it might alter their life somehow, or they, like many people are just plain and simply selfish. It is a sad fact that certain people do not belong in a family. They will not be invited in again, whether they are blood related or not. It took a major catastrophe to discover what everyone really thought. Dominic stood alone most nights, but it would not be for much longer, he felt. It is better to avoid those who take from you solely to make their own life easier. It is kinder not to invite them when you know they are not able to see you for what you are. Dominic was told a long time ago that Laura would stab him in a fight, he remembered this, but didn’t realise it would be twisted and the pain would last forever. His mother forgot that part of her prediction. He had spent too much time with an audience and it was not him they came to see. He was merely an accessory for a show he would not pay or choose to see. He was not in any need to perform for them, as they could not relate to him. If only they had given him shekels, he would have stayed there and he could have been seen. When Dominic did perform he wanted to share his song, one that illustrated some expression and didn’t last too long. The family would grow again, now it had lost the thorn that stopped its growth. Dominic created a song. It came from Bohemia with love as its central theme, one about a rising tide that encapsulated him. He had a voice in his head that misguided him. The central role was given away when the curtain finally went down. The theatre was closed when renovations were taking place but it never opened again. There were no performers left to act in an indescribable way. Its seats removed and its fittings dismantled, it was shipped off to another land where the audiences were fresh. They would receive this show enthusiastically and uncontrollably, marvel at the sheer insolence and the spectacle. And these people were the best, as they would never see through the facade, like the older folk before. They would never know it wasn’t natural or didn’t bear some need
Laura had robbed their savings to fund the life with her third world man. He was escaping those who sought to harm him in many different ways. He thought that maybe in their great effort to make a profit. He had found his way onto their list and it wasn’t easy to get off this list once on it. It was a front for some survival and born from denial. Dominic wasn’t sure how he would quite handle the day. these collectors would never remove your name. Dominic had quite a range of people to teach. He had been placed in debt and chased thereafter. but none of his students were poor or struggling to pay. all of them. so he was not was easy to trace. once again. No collector would fly to Czech and make it up the stairs. Dominic was paid in cash and there was no record of his existence apart from his medical insurance. Where there is no love there is nothing. This was another part of the legacy he had inherited from the instigator of misery. He assumed this of course. he had lived it. if he did he would be so jet-lagged and out of breath he would not be able to say his name. But in this society they had been labelled as having done well. Winter was looming but the days had not become cold yet. but he thought his predators would not find him in Czech.Penize to share something based on love. far from those who cared for him. Laura. It can interrupt our sleep and stop our love pouring all over us. Dominic had rationalised it. forever it seemed. an ancient one found in jesters all over this Czech land. It took seven years. well some of them. There were signs of what was to come and this concerned him. Some in fact from the wealth they had accumulated by the labour of others. had differing 62 . He was free and yet he couldn’t function as his head had decided independently that he would struggle with heavy eyes through four classes. He had come so far that he needed to tolerate whatever came his way.Chapter 8 . He taught English in Czech to unsuspecting souls who paid the money from their servitude. He was crippled and penniless. but this time it was a different day in November. He was fascinated by their motivation. weather or tales of woe and loneliness. It would just descend down the list as time lapsed. But this would not disturb his sanctuary. His hunters were men in suits in offices with lists of suspected individuals. it was heated well despite the sleepless nights or stories from home. Their ages varied and they all. yet there were those who owed him money too and in this liquid obsessed society it was thought about on a regular basis. but financially he had been stripped of everything. Dominic had to cope not only with his emotional loss. His paranoia was nullified in this top floor apartment up four flights of stairs. It was another aspect of his dilemma here alone in this strange country. Dominic felt as if he had just arrived again. They would not see it is a trick. The fool sat waiting for another chance to perform. They had shown their hand in endless correspondence and phone messages he never responded to. perhaps. Dominic saw only the colours of yellow and red worn in a striking way.
A Bohemian Fool
reasons for studying in their home country. These were practical needs and some artificial, some for prestige and some for business reasons. They certainly represented the nouveau riche of this country, people that aspired and took opportunities at the fall of the previous regime in 1989. The English language had emerged from the range of European possibilities as the choice of us all in cross-nation communication, mostly driven by the United States in their management of world affairs. It is regarded as everyone’s second language and the lingua franca in all negotiations between differing speakers. It makes sense to have a language like this but why English? It is not the most poetic or refined in the world. Its grammar is inconsistent and lacking clarity in many areas. There were so many others more fitting. From Dominic’s perspective it provided a constant method of survival, as he became older, as the corporate world began to deny his servitude, as he fell out of favour. He might just have too many opinions and not be flexible enough to work long hours for less pay than last year. This amphetamine like existence of long nights was not very pleasant. Dominic could not switch off his mind; many things were being shifted through its pulsating cells while he closed his eyes and tried to focus on one thing. Nothing seemed to work, a beer, another cigarette and not even coffee. A warm room or a cold room, the aches were increasing again in his shoulders. It was a bizarre strain, this virus he picked up almost immediately on arrival. He even generated sexual desire to ward off the gremlins in his mind, but this didn’t work either. He had no emails to answer and no web sites to ponder on. He had run out of these useless things to do. At least he could be satisfied that he was not floundering any longer. He was thinking positively and only in a mildly mad manner as opposed to being totally mad. This was his normal condition, where he allowed issues to fester inside of him and he would throw them about exclusively looking for an answer. This usually came as a result of a trivial matter that had no importance; something someone had said, or done. It was never about important things and when the roof caved in on top of him, he stopped mulling matters over in his mind. He lived through these things instead. They somehow became him. This was a new phenomenon to his psyche as he had always managed to remain aloof and detached from these things as if he was a witness to his own life. Life was like this, some positive aspects and negative neatly combined to keep the man afloat in reality. The shift back to Dominic sifting through issues was endemic of the flu tablets. Dominic needed to show identification for them, so strong were they. However, he didn’t have this problem before when he had used them to still go to work in this demanding society that no longer offered sick pay to those not fully employed. Dominic, once, was susceptible to the influence of drugs; he was opened up as a young man with hallucinogenic forms, which were still the rage
Chapter 8 - Penize
in the era of his youth. It was not recreational either; not as today, where individuals seek to obscure reality for a few hours of fun - this was no escapism. He perceived his experiences as profound and meaningful which he had wanted them to be. They didn’t disappoint in any way. He tried to share this place and visions he visited then, but it was so hard to describe in terms we use in our language. There were no words other than clichés that failed to satisfy the meaning. Other modes of communication seemed to do this better, such as music, which he tried unsuccessfully. The ineffectiveness of language is unsurprising, it has its limitations. Dominic believed these places he had seen were as real as his sleepless nights, but each one required a journey to get there. He took too many short cuts at a young age and reached a rather isolated place, at first not alone. It was too much for a soul unguided by older or wiser men. The lions to the gates roared at his audacity. He only spent his time with younger men and women who never went this far. This distance between this and him threatened his ability to manage in this world. So, he took a safe but lonely option and lived with it for such a long time. He wanted to go back there on this night, but without a forced entry or haste. He wanted to get there naturally and assimilate to the rhythm of the sound in normal time and normal space. He was looking for a guide again; he hoped the lions would be kinder this time. He once sought such a person, but was taken off his track by a demanding family and a woman who saw her partner disappearing out the back door. He would have not run off with another woman, but a guru or another way of living his life. He was always dissatisfied with his own despite having it all, in a narrow image and perspective of the values we hold. Dominic had come a full circle running, hiding, caring and hoping. It was the start of a special time, he felt, a time where he rediscovered himself in this mire of confusion that surrounded him. It was a purpose built model of confusion that was destined to keep us separated from each other and ourselves, the thought ran through again in his mind. There was hope, in many ways. There was a possibility to avoid the fallout from his demise, there was a chance to be free from tyranny and there was something real in Dominic’s heart waiting there for Claudia. Tony had said Dominic’s feelings would explode on his return if the new couple were careful to manage the external issues well. This comment attached itself to Dominic’s mind as it was intended to convince him to take the right option. Tony was not foolish. Dominic went to Karlovy Vary without a clear reason, only known to his internal guide whom he attempted to listen to intently. He listened for the signs to show him, which was the more positive way to go. It was telling him to go back to Claudia more and more each day as if she was a beacon that shined and he was a ship fearing the rocky coast. Dominic could rest there with her and not
A Bohemian Fool
take more casualties or suffer more troubles. His indebtedness to his guiding light was truly founded on his love for this light. Love for this enlightenment in this lifetime. He went off too early, so confident were his thoughts. So stable his background, so long his lifetimes and numerous too, it had always felt this way. He hoped his thoughts were founded on something real as he was concerned it would be another movement he should not take. Although he was there in that region of Bohemia his tales were from far and wide. The local stories were plentiful and they had nowhere to hide, but he was not there to reason or to understand their depth or clarity. Dominic was there, like all men to feel the water upon his skin, taste its content and spirit. Those guardians of the secrets had stolen the essence of his world, the one he was so proud to own from him, and the ones Dominic was yet to define. We knew of their well-being and we know their names very well, but we didn’t know why they fooled us and presented this picture and false vision to keep us away from the truth. We must take their route to get nowhere and waste another life. It pleases them and we must believe their illusory covering of what is true and fair. We must adhere to their method of slavery and work for their endless projects of deception. We can never tune into reality as it is strictly out of bounds. Dominic brought this into his mind as if it was a revelation he had realised, but always known. Why this is was, no one was sure, its purpose unclear, there were few reasons written by other men. There were many words pointing to this corruption and evidence suggesting it was true. We turned to established bodies of men who only offered confusion in our times of crisis and woe. There was no one to guide us or to lead us from the darkness and we fumbled around wondering, looking for some clues. The clues to the nightmares we were delivered and the obligations under which we were placed alluded us. This powerful collection of circumstances ensured little progress was made. But Dominic, like some others, was not happy with this, he wanted to break through and he would not accept any new world order delivered by one person or a thousand men, not on a local level or a global one. Dominic received at least five emails a day requesting he contact differing people regarding a private matter. This meant you owed money to someone. The most interesting aspect was that the institutions sold these debts almost immediately if they thought their treasured customer was not going to repay them. You then had to deal with another company who had bought the debt and those organisations were the collectors. They pursued debtors to make a profit to recoup their outlay. It was clear that somehow it was not legal. The original contract had been nullified so therefore you didn’t owe anything. But much of the financial world was fraught with illegal activity; there are criminals in suits and offices who cover themselves with respectability. These third parties
we were not going to fight in a war. they didn’t care why. We were encouraged individually to be in debt as this was essential to the system that propagates it. someone was empowered to create it from nothing. Someone created money. those notes.Chapter 8 . He had his earth polluted with gases and inefficient energy systems. And then there was interest too. Naturally if all of us had said no. They would forget about him for a while then. He would let them think he lived there and then they would no longer search for him in Australia. They had the power to take money from your earnings through courts and they could requisition your goods from your house. He was a victim of his circumstance. we were not going to pay. this could not be right. which even said in England “I promise to pay the bearer”. Money and its designed indebtedness was a main factor in personal conflict and trouble. without your consent. but the will of once again. It was a legacy that was unfair and one he had to live with. The system allowed the creation of ten times each deposit for each institution. our puppeteers. He then became the victim of a new world order both privately and slowly. there was no point explaining your life situation to them. It was a disgusting and evil system that ensured competition and conflict to merely survive. It was not a pleasant feeling. but this mattered little to those who hunted you. It meant he could not borrow again for some time. It didn’t exist in its own right. Imagine if society was not based on money. they failed to question the basic components of their lives. It was not naturally a part of this earth. it was not based not on the natural order of things. No one dared question this illegal practice. Whenever there were two people involved they hounded the one more likely to respond. you then owed someone else. Dominic was a victim of spiritual suppression. not even for a car. but what could he do? Everyone said 66 . he was a victim of a large financial burden. By decree.Penize were ruthless and relentless in their pursuit of the money you owed them. Being overseas made it harder for them. he had his food modified with additives and chemicals. What a different world we would have inhabited. only when you were going to pay. many years. Somehow people were led like sheep and accepted everything they were told. It was as frightening as having large and obviously violent men call at your house. It was not to be. publicly too. would have been obsolete. But this was the same as saying no. there would be nothing anyone could have done about it. It guaranteed our commitment to the system and ensured we continued to participate in a society in the form it was designed in. Dominic’s situation had not been created by him. Dominic decided that before he left the small city he would contact them all and give them his contact details in Czech. they sometimes hired local agents to collect on their behalf. It determined and shaped what we could do and what we could not and it offered us false hope and promises in confusing forms. there would be no war. he would put them off the scent.
Dominic had lost all his assets and worldly goods and he had little or no money to call on. they had not yet realised. more succinctly. there was always one to speak of. to place this dream in order. He didn’t know who the student was as he had never seen her face. Claudia and Dominic had lived through this before. We were subjected to speculators. he felt. although we thought we were free to wander this earth. which could be withdrawn at any time. or to a higher understanding. He thought he would stop being a victim from that moment. Finished. Dominic was teaching an extra lesson at night when he was asleep. in a constant crisis riddled and torn place where you were always led to believe. to another level perhaps. he was in the best position he had been in for years. It was hard though and the root cause of his total misery at this time. He had said. Together they would make a great team to survive what could surely arrive one day. Dominic had started this process already. they termed them. that you were about to go to war or be attacked. But then there would be another reason for their meeting. Dominic. One that. no more. but everything was subjected to someone else’s approval. Everyone was just as vulnerable. to certain things. when everything was systematically stolen and dismantled. who caused stock market downturns. It was hard to be free from all that besieged us. Your credit could be stopped at a moment’s notice by a click of a mouse or a keystroke. It was one he could not claim shekels for. in differing ways. It was obviously a prison we lived in. unlike the previous version that we could not. and it was fact. We would be herded into camps like the sheep we were for our own safety. The nightmares would then begin for us all regardless of wealth or debt. And we would believe their story. no debt either apart from the collectors’ story. Who. should this be the fate of us all. When he thought to himself that he was making it up she came with someone else and spoke to him. he had to still work to be able to eat. It had no real value but was thought of as being the only value in the world. We would all be in prisons we could see. He believed it was those masters of our destiny who created this. They were the keepers of the secrets who shaped our experiences to keep us from ourselves. Dominic didn’t believe in fate. he would encourage others to see what he saw. he was not sure. other than it was a man who brought her 67 . and sometimes rightly. It had gone on too long. Your house could be requisitioned even if you owned it. Those external factors would have less effect on him than many unless the world was thrown into a crisis. had experienced this. and he would say no and take the risk of persecution. They could reduce your wealth in a moment. we would all be the same. One that would take them both somewhere.A Bohemian Fool those words. He would seek out a different path. the other person was. Claudia. another manufactured disaster that would empty the shelves of the stores of basic supplies.
And he never paid another dollar for this loan. but they did not believe or care about his situation. they would ask you to verify your personal information before they would speak to you. not mine. he never saw her again.Chapter 8 . It was a strange process as you called them and they asked you for your date of birth and other questions before they would talk to you. it was rather strange as he had been the victim of banking for a long time with chequebooks and cash cards for machines and credit cards. which he could not define. He kept the cash he received in Czech in a tin on his desk. We had been forced to have these things. by only one day. deliberately they might do so. but the strange thing was. But there was a presence he could feel.Penize to this special class. but it had another component. If you refused to give them this information they would not speak to you. ‘no. He was unclear whether she was a good student or not. Dominic was being honest with them. with some work to do and it was at this point he did think it was an illusion in his mind. despite them badgering you for months in a multitude of ways to get you to contact them. There was more than one lesson a week but its frequency was not his choice or he didn’t know when they were next to meet. but he could not be sure. It sent some signals of concern and slight fear when he thought about it. He was not even sure what it was he was teaching. Dominic naturally refused to give this information and they always said. all of them. he would have continued to pay them whenever he could. if there was still cash. No mercy was shown. a Dickensian one perhaps. After this lesson was complete. there was another way. He was unnerved to find in his inbox three emails politely requesting he contact someone regarding a personal matter. the debt was sold by one particular bank. Her work was written on a wall. it was English in some form. It was not like any other lesson he ever taught. It was as if he was in another era too. But as soon as he was late one day paying. We were moving toward a cashless society and this was a serious problem for us all. Dominic once stayed in a hotel and discovered this when 68 . To which he replied. it is only in your interests. They were thieves in his opinion. The problem was that if someone had the power to stop your life at any given moment. He left messages for her. But. When this whole process started Dominic tried unsuccessfully to continue paying his creditors and did so at great suffering to himself. now this was reserved only to individuals and not institutions that compounded your misery in times of hardship and stress. it was in his best interests to do so.’ Their illegal operations netted them buckets full of dollars and caused incredible heartache to lots of people. They changed your credit rating on a monthly basis these companies. If you telephoned these people. He once felt an obligation to return debt to anyone. which Dominic could see. the same as the daytime classes. He telephoned them to explain that his pay was arriving tomorrow and was surprised when they said they no longer held this loan.
There existed a controlling force. in his anarchistic manner. This society was kind in some ways and merciless in others. which was why the bill was not paid. people were released and then squeezed and held in debt. It brought misery to our hearts. In Ancient Greece debt bondage was outlawed at a time when even children were taken in lieu of outstanding debt. but neither way was good for us. It was an interesting experience as he saw immediately how vulnerable he was to the click of a button. He would still be there now at this hotel paying off his debt in the kitchens had he not been able to persuade them to pay! He ran up this credit card to its maximum limit and never paid it again.000 overnight as his credit rating slipped because of non-payment of another bill.000 at his disposal. So he telephoned the company at great expense and managed to get them to pay his hotel bill. It has always been a feature of civilised society. 69 . But it was not in any way how it seemed. as he was overseas. He had no other means to pay. lived in a boom and bust combination. The previous day he had £15. These sensible people didn’t appreciate the others who. They squandered nothing and bought only essential things. this was reduced to £1. He was overseas at the time.A Bohemian Fool he checked out and his credit card was declined. Many spent their whole life worrying about it and preparing for it.
He would rather fight an internal battle with all the might of the French Revolution and declare an internal republic void of external influence and delusion. Even they could be taken out of the masquerade as quickly as they had risen to power. we were divided and forever ruled and imprisoned. We had all voted for change many times. but even they lost themselves and started to believe it was they that controlled the region earmarked to them and like Napoleon even more. We were always dying. They were still mortal and more importantly at the mercy of those powers that be. were prone to fall to an assassin or a mysterious accident. This was an ever-present possibility lurking in the background. The common factor is. but there was none. They played musical chairs in a game. To gain freedom we had to fight. Before. Many backs were turned. we were fighting for God. We could lose our home and our fortune. He had to beg to survive. If he chose not to conform he risked the likelihood of physical suffering and hunger. The majority who were clearly in denial about their own instability classified you as unstable. might suffer homelessness. Dominic was not a fighter. we were fighting for freedom this time from terror. and he was not a violent man. you were seen as having problems and could not be helped. it was not in his nature. to reach equality we had to endure years of hunger. It had to be his fault. an indescribable disaster that becomes permanent. Naturally. 70 .Svobody ‘Liberty or death’ they exclaimed! ‘The brotherhood of man must unite. not one of these was right.’ Revolutionary cries like these have been utilised throughout history to denote the opposite of their meaning. Apart. They too. we were always fighting. Dominic hadn’t realised this until this time when he found himself one step away from being released from living in what was seen as a normal way.Svobody Chapter 9 . It was guaranteed that another regime would soon evolve into one and the same as the previous one. This was the slippery path that was far easier than it was perceived to join and it took you to living on the streets.Chapter 9 . give me equality!’ ‘Bear arms and let us fight whoever stands against us. which naturally he found disconcerting. Dominic searched and wished for personal freedom. to obtain liberty we had to suffer and be terrorised. it was really possible. Or worse. but it did seem as though we had to all achieve this together. many people didn’t want to know any of his troubles. which was a horrendous crime to even see. you were dismissed as an incapable man who could not function in this world.
It had no connection to who we were and what our nature was and is. There was not any peace as you were 71 . It left you confused and disconnected. feeding out of dustbins. we followed our orders. for while we were busy surviving there was no time for contemplation or discovery. They were blamed for every crime ever committed and suffered extreme violence and hatred. What did you have left after all the tasks had been completed? When we looked at older men. You could have a nice car. in his case would be stronger than him. it was true. This was an alternative to not conforming to the rules of this game. Many people laughed at this simplistic account of our lives. Claudia. It was Dominic that was a fortunate man.A Bohemian Fool It was the first time in Dominic’s life that he ever needed help and there was none available. Your mind had been separated by the complexities of work and families you had to provide for. They suffered immensely and were on the end of constant ridicule and were avoided at all costs by other members of the so named. There were some sections of society who resisted. quick to inform the foreigner of the internal enemy. she took Dominic in and gave him comfort and love. We had given away our right to determine our time here in this form. It was being programmed daily by many sources. apart from one true soul who was a virtual stranger. homelessness. such as the Romany. Looking for somewhere to sleep each night often on cold city streets. It was far removed from this. a pretty wife as attractive women mostly liked rich and successful men so we were reminded. they sat bemused how life had just passed them by as if they had had no control over any of it. You had a choice. Men had been told lies and manipulated from the cradle to the grave and what did they do with their own children? The same. There was little space left to tune into your cosmic mind. conform or be damned. he was given freedom and equality. Loneliness. and finding tobacco from ends of cigarettes. They were considered suitable to reproduce with. But you could do it in luxury. You could choose your method of suffering in your stupidity. Dominic learnt of their criminality and dirty ways from Czech’s. normal society. but those who cared would remember. poverty and being the victim of violence were the alternatives to being a slave. untrue. Yet. What would happen if we no longer did what they said? If we thought this would happen then it was not difficult to realise there were forces greater than us and therefore we were submitting to them on a daily basis for survival and for some peace of mind. and the powers that existed worked hard at dividing them and breaking their family units into pieces. naturally. but if you did conform you were still damned. who. It was true in Czech that no one liked the Romany. apparently. He owned as much as the next animal on the street as this was what he too might have become. Asking for change on street corners and having to fight with other men. Aborigines and others in more remote regions. somehow they were strong as they were together.
not through the faithful versions found in religions although they all had some hidden essence. to go further. it sounded like a warning of an air raid. Dominic knew little of anything in the Czech Republic. It was all a manufactured movie production. To get beyond this was possible though. This gave hope. They no longer hid this fact that they were all singing very much the same song. whatever colour of the spectrum you took. but the same masters always controlled the opposite sides in a conflict. A siren went off near the apartment. In fact. a reality created to inspire us and terrorise us collectively. although it was something. the Russians were coming back. He had only seen such things on TV and had never been anywhere where they had such practice runs. In fact. But to get stuck in this position was no different than believing the official version of anything. It was punctuated afterwards with short burst high pitch sounds. homecomings and peace over time. we needed to break on through to the other side. Some people looked to concentrate on higher perspectives and spiritual pathways. they thought. There were so many tricks in this show. he was not sure. but nothing had changed.Svobody always troubled by some detail. at least to begin with. but remembered they were already there. We thought this meant getting stoned repeatedly. It was very easy to get stuck on how these things were done and not why? There were many of these people who spent hours and hours proving their conspiracy theories. As Jim had told us a long time ago. as the movie is carefully and so eloquently arranged to represent whatever it was you thought you wanted to discover. but we were all wrong. The Piscean age of conflict was still ever present. It was all part of the production. But we dreamed of its colourful nature. all over the world. an Aquarian. actual wars. we might not see the Aquarian spiritual revival. was as men who were born to expose this agenda. Dominic turned up the music but it didn’t help much. He thought that perhaps. it was a coordinated movement against the people. to discover anything within the boundaries and all were taken care of. to be ready when we returned. it couldn’t be ignored. This was allowed. He never learnt of their meaning. It was a practice but what for. they continued unabated as their role. When he went out afterwards he was not sure what he would find. You were taken up and down with interest rises and falls. It was all about detail. Dominic was sceptical. suspected conflicts. this systematic approach denoted that there was some urgency to move this agenda along. all parameters had been thought of. The noise was so deafening. but more through the real insights they could give. Differing political beliefs were a sham as in reality the governments did what they were told and this became more overt and obvious. we needed to understand.Chapter 9 . 72 . They would prototype something somewhere and implement it everywhere. The details were not important. Laughed at by the majority.
which aged us and sedatives in food and water. we were targeted with what children loved most. and also in the air. Denied the truth. we thought. and when we looked for help.A Bohemian Fool We lived in a decadent. Goals were accomplished one step at a time so as to never arise suspicion. but he thought many people were starting to join those obscure dots at this time. superficial. they would destroy our minds and reproductive systems. They kept our lifespan short and our minds weak whilst pretending to do the opposite. This would render us docile and weak before our masters’ power. If we refused. Those who did see it were thought of as insane. When our ability to learn had been affected. We grew depressed. When our minds were young. as his ideas were different. as they stood above us with their experience. We were distracted by sexual motivation. yet we were fed more poison. We were promised that cures were coming on many fronts. as our masters knew the secrets of the absolute. and where mass media and education were devoted to propaganda and indoctrination. slow and obese. The illusion was so large it escaped normal perception. Dominic joined this list of the mentally unstable very early in his life. we survived somehow. After birth we were injected with poisons and we were fooled into believing that it was for our children’s benefit. We saw these products being used in film and we grew accustomed to them and never knew their true effect. Poisons were everywhere we turned. We were always feeling inferior. The soft metals would cause us to lose our minds. This prevented us from seeing the changes as they occurred. we were kept in a state of arrested development. They used their knowledge of science and technology in subtle ways so we would never see what was happening. we received more poison. They worked together always and remained bound by blood and secrecy. Nevertheless. Our minds did not belong to us and we did as we were told. with fun images and musical tones. Our attention was focused toward money and material goods so we never connected with our inner-self. Separate fronts were created to prevent anyone from seeing any of the connections. They would put soft metals. sweet things. our children soon would be born unable to function. it formed a blanket over us. The peoples of the world and even their governments were merely children under age who needed permission to do everything. we were taught that the poisons were good. We looked up for help. and we were force fed more poisons. From all this. The poisons were absorbed through our skin and mouths. hypocritical society where people sold their souls for money and sex. befitting children or cattle. external pleasures and games so could never be one with the oneness of it all. Anyone who uttered the truths would cease to exist. we would receive more medicine that would make us sicker and cause other diseases for which yet more medicine would be created. ways would be 73 . When our teeth decayed we had them filled with metals that would kill our mind and steal our future.
it was extinguished by ridicule. so we had no voice wherever we lived. There was constructed animosity between us through our factions. This was accomplished by using hate as an ally and anger as a friend. Objectives were always hidden. we could not see them. and never would we see that from our conflicts our masters emerged always as our rulers. We didn’t know that colour was an illusion. Fear was used against us as a weapon. as they were not part of the masters group. The divine truth was always hidden from us. We continued to be made to live in fear and anger through images and sounds. the result was that we destroyed each other. We would be made to kill each other when it so suited our masters. One we were never familiar with. we were accused of crimes and a different story was presented to the world. We lived in a money system that imprisoned us forever. as our masters owned the media. but eternal life they never had. We were deceived into accepting laws that stole the little freedom we had. We were helpless to do anything. and were promised eternal life.Svobody found to implement mind-altering technology into our lives. Our masters prospered from our wars and our deaths. We were made to hate our neighbours and ourselves. If we rose up against this we were crushed like insects. 74 . We were controlled in all aspects of our lives and we were told what to think and how. One group owned both sides. We bathed in our own blood and killed our neighbours for as long as our masters saw fit. The tools were provided by our labour. Our masters had all the tools to accomplish this. we always thought that we were not equal. We were separated from the oneness by dogma and religion. If we got together. We were guided kindly and gently letting us think we were guiding ourselves. whichever suited our masters best. They sent us crazed leaders who in the name of some doctrine we were made to aspire to. Our families would never mix with our masters. or death. Their blood had to be pure always. but the plan was always carried out. We were made to rip each other’s hearts apart and kill our own children. Our masters benefited greatly from this. Media controlled the flow of information and sentiment in our masters’ favour. If a light shone among us. for it is the way. that we are all one. We performed the labour for our masters and they prospered from our toil. as we had no weapons. The hate blinded us totally. This pattern was repeated over and over until our masters’ ultimate goal was accomplished. our resources and wealth too. Governments were established with opposites within. It had been decided that we must never know.Chapter 9 . for we believed we were less than that. keeping our children and us in debt. whereby we lost total control over our destiny. Our masters recruited some of us to carry out their plans. Our land was taken over.
We just needed to find out what had been done to us. His abstention from ‘normal things’ was associated with his awakening to the lies and sacrificial process we all undertook. where did its real identity lie? Dominic saw a crossroads for his personal life and also the world. they believe. Our reality was our prison. The truth was hidden in their face. The connections to everything were clear to Dominic. never knowing the truth. never would they receive the light and travel the stars. It was clear from his seat in this small town in the west of Bohemia that a global war was happening at this moment. In return. the beliefs that had been established from time immemorial. This they never knew. the only real connection was available. it was just timing. We lived in self-delusion. visa requirements were being lifted for visitors. Members of these groups thought they were one with our masters. The Czech’s celebrated 90 years of existence with a military parade. our masters would have no place to run. He had no right to tie in such serious events with his own pathetic existence. owned us. Our minds were bound by our beliefs. 75 . but never would they become immortal and join our masters. for the killing of their own kind would prevent passage to the realm of enlightenment. but it didn’t. Yet they were once again being targeted as a battleground for missile defence systems this time by the United States. Dominic had been under siege and we were under siege. he had woken from his deep and disturbed sleep kept under lock and key. he hoped he was. but we were not this time. that together we could destroy our masters. This covenant was sealed by blood. This we were never meant to learn. he knew. His own silly little world was intrinsically linked to the global picture. The reality that had been created for us. that they would never know they were slaves. We were all waking up at this time. This secret covenant was one by which we were made to live the rest of our present and future lives. so grand the illusion of freedom was. They never learnt this. Always in the middle of war zones for centuries. as it would be easy to see who they were once the veil had fallen. our masters’ blood. so close they came.A Bohemian Fool The recruits were called “initiates” and were indoctrinated to believe false rites of passage to higher realms. We only needed to learn. A new era of domination would surely begin. But this reign of terror somehow needed to be stopped. as this reality transcended many generations and life spans. Our masters are the ones who came from heaven to earth. we would be put to the sword. they would not be able to focus on it until it was too late. Their actions would have been revealed as to who they were and we could hunt them down and no person would give them shelter. For their work they were rewarded with earthly things and great titles. But if we ever found out we are were equal. They would never reach the higher realms. but only to protect himself.
teenagers to ensure they do not breach curfews and then specific workers for industry. as it would connect with you at will. Soon the list would widen. And then those of us. and financial institutions. With conspiracy theorists and personal opinion blog sites all gone. who were left. Who would be micro chipped without their consent? No one. whereas a few years ago it would have been laughable to even suggest this notion. the Internet would become as methodical and necessary as our previous bankcards were to pay for things. then. Sheep often know they are to be killed. he had been tested for explosives on numerous occasions. eventually under their skin.Svobody There was a new form of the Internet being developed at this time. but it’s warm inside that room. Yet. but there would be good reasons. pay for things. Its information would take the form of the established media and the emphasis would solely be on interaction with others. it became surprising to meet someone who hadn’t been convicted of this heinous crime. It would also bring very tight restrictions and assessments. old people to care for their health. children would be for their safety and convicts to protect society. As always. would discover that unless we too joined the programme we would not be able to travel. This method of introducing things slowly would be practised here. be they machines. which would tie humans up literally in many ways. but he had never seen any in his life. Motoring offences and parking offences went up by thousands of percent in these years. He didn’t know what these objects even looked like? We were being criminalised more and more. Naturally this included people who were being lined up with the same chip embedded. Security was the excuse this time. in the face of things he saw. It promised to be a radical approach to interacting with our world where our identification will be as crucial as the objects we interacted with. His liberties were being eroded every day in a different way. computing was a two way and a multi channel system that was designed to further restrict our freedoms. Pets were chipped to monitor their whereabouts first. It would cover all facets of our lives. There was no reduction in deaths on the roads. yes he’d become crazy. It proved very timely. operate a car or even be in employment. This basically was the interaction of objects each connected with chips that inter-relate. This is how it will be introduced. The police became law enforcement officers and did not police society 76 . How do we find our liberty? Dominic wondered if he had gained it recently when his secure world collapsed. Eventually. there existed a shift in perception. it will not stop us lining up. it was happening in most first world countries and previously where it was slightly embarrassing to admit such offences.Chapter 9 . things we own. There would be no method of escaping any system. It would filter out unwanted material with gatekeepers monitoring information and checking its validity. But despite this obvious incursion into our private life. The third incarnation promised to be more secure and offered a new concept of ‘things’. all of us would be chipped.
Socialism was a word of hope in the 19th Century. The difference was little in real terms. things that were held in common for the common good as opposed to democratic liberalism which was based on ownership and did not reflect the true meaning of the words. The numbers of people who had their DNA samples taken also rose rapidly and this also reflected a pattern of criminalising all of the population regardless of circumstances or actions that took place. Dominic’s new world order did not follow this pattern. his was imposed overnight. he had a version of liberty. Celtic culture had this method of grooming talented individuals into ruling bloodlines to ensure a high quality of leadership. The revolutionaries of France sought to end divine rule of kings. Robespierre.A Bohemian Fool any more. So what was it that predetermined this reign of terror? This historical coincidence that occurs many times sees a philosophy utilised as a reason to terrorise the entire population. It is curious to compare it with what we know with more recent history. which ended up a severe and disgusting bloodletting exercise. on humanity. and did so. In later times when Nationalism became the order of the day it was based on an ethnic and a linguistic basis that gave security to an ever industrialising and changing world. and therefore should be placed in context of all acts of slaughter. We all had much to worry about as each year became decidedly worse. Yet we considered this period of time like all others to be uncivilised and pagan. not at any time in history. Our liberty is and never has been allowed. 77 . A predetermined reign of terror is not an historical coincidence. The adage of ‘if you haven’t done anything wrong you have nothing to worry about’ belonged in a different era. Their role had changed. It was a slow process that was hastened by certain momentous and horrific events that acted as a catalyst to deliver this new world order. then replaced it with another model named the republic. liberal or democratic. a system far more democratic and one that even women were elected into.
However they believed it. He ate at the German Pub. The older people longed for normal things we had in the west. What is it we want this time. He asked what their wishes were. He thought he was invisible. as somehow. He no longer needed to supplement his life with others as he had done for many years before. They had liberty. Dominic did not. Their responses were non-existent. Yet. she never inspired him to really give or love. but there must have been something in the Western way of never being satisfied. She still needed to share more with him to satisfy his incessant desire to know 78 . as if he really wasn’t sure of much or Claudia. so ill had he been. There was always the possibility they were more contented than their teacher. clothes and make-up when they were teenagers.Chapter 10 . the hot water was still gushing out. The cups were new ones as the old ones had been taken back to Moscow or St Petersburg. He started talking with many students and trying to work out how they felt. It was a defining moment for him.Laska Chapter 10 . he looked awful. when they were children and what they might be now and their answers were quite revealing. It still sold his favourite beer. as they couldn’t comprehend his western thinking. after all they hadn’t just lost everything. Perhaps. these moments were coming thick and fast. Dominic proposed to them a concept. He saw it in their hearts and eyes. He was as addicted to sex as the cigarettes he smoked and he had sought it at every opportunity. which they didn’t understand. such as bicycles and the girls.Laska Dominic walked again down to the spa area. Dominic had put aside his doomsday vision of the world in the past and the present. Dominic suspected they might not be revealing everything to him. The Russians were still congregating with their little porcelain cups. it was firmly in someone else’s mind and not his. our prison we adhered to. they sensed. It was a significant turning point in his life and displayed a radical change in his outlook. this was unnoticed by him and not influenced by him. Dominic always needed excitement and sexual interaction when he lived with Laura. The lights were low. His eyesight was so poor he couldn’t even see if she was attractive or if she was even his age. but he no longer wanted to. Dominic pursued and investigated their mindset. so the atmosphere was romantic. They had their dachas and their country air. There was no logic to this interaction. their perspective of their own life. they thought they had it all. He normally took his chances and used them well. They were mostly contented. he had never understood. There was a woman staring at him continually whenever he looked up. until this night. they were as contented as anyone you would meet. Deprivation is a wonderful tool for creating future superficial happiness. material possessions and apart from small housing. He believed.
a drive to a Saxon city and some night-time fun. But. A feeling that weakened his resolve and physically affected him. not from necessity. He was drawn to her this time. Dominic would have been sitting with her. but he needed no commitment in case his canal barge on a river needed to navigate another way. although highly satisfactory sometimes. He never looked anywhere then. he could hear her words. This kind of love. he believed. but he always knew what was going on. but from a real burning desire to be with her. but when he felt alive and had something to share. He had no need to go. Dominic had found Claudia and recently took to her like some religious doctrine he was determined to follow. He was loyal. He had a trio to attend to. these were hard to explain to anyone. She was German. It would be hard to hide with Dominic. The people who invited him would not invite him again. He didn’t want to go. eating with her and eventually sleeping with her. and even went shooting in the country. His thoughts were clarifying and enough for this night. He cancelled all his arrangements for the weekend. it fired up inside him. He didn’t need some casual love affair. What it was that changed him was totally unclear to him. was one of the things that had changed. she also. He believed this. they were disappointed with his refusal. He knew Claudia needed to hide sometimes and he knew she needed to go off sometimes to different places. He was not tempted despite an incredible loneliness that hung over him since he lost his friend to the lure of posterity and false hope. All of those things might have been interesting but Dominic used his illness to excuse himself. He didn’t pretend he was not dependent in his life. Who was known in this life. The woman Dominic couldn’t see still kept looking. but there was no conversion required or weekend retreats. can be thought of as having been known before in a previous time and incarnation. He had lost his playful and flirtatious manner and not since he had loved for the first time had he felt this way. There was a large ocean between them physically. offered a different style of living to him and he had to adjust too. but these had all been brushed away. he could tell. He felt it then and had done so for some time. Dominic missed an opportunity tonight as the woman left with her friend. Not when he was lonely. But he preferred to be alone with his thoughts and his liquid moments. He had been concerned about many things. not even once.A Bohemian Fool everything and he even apologised in advance. the next day and the next. but he was busy sitting with Claudia in his mind and Laura was still there too. despite his natural indifference. his verse was fitting sometimes and not others. He felt closer to her than ever before. which wasn’t always good. He didn’t need to fill his life with events that had no purpose. He could have taken a long walk from the mountains via various pubs. 79 . so he had no need to go over and get involved. He felt no sadness. In previous years. He sat in his top floor apartment and he frittered away the day. He questioned and probed.
It was good as he was not fooled by anything and he took her for what she was and not what he or she thought Claudia might be. but he didn’t mind the reasons. It has been captured and formalised and its nature mystified for benefits other than ours. but even the blind realise they have been sold something that was not real and did not make them see. a sum total of her. but he could always be persuaded otherwise. He was tired. and he tried to navigate the Aharva River. She didn’t know this about him. We were being forced to compete to avoid solitude and like homelessness it was the only way for many of us. it’s not a tangible object. they took him to the same place.Chapter 10 . In Sanskrit there are thirty words describing the word “love”. It’s a chemical connection. we need some extra words to describe the many facets and interpretations derived.Laska He took to his barge. A relationship was based on behaviour and not on feelings. It is why he could not relate to too many people as he could see too much at first glance. where we sat. Then. Some termed it judgmental behaviour. He had lived too long like this. But the definition is too broad. He had heard many stories that were relevant to others. We were only as good as our last transaction. it all in one moment. Love finds us. These were pushed to the rear and were not dealt with after time. but first he had to reach the ocean and in turn another land. we can purchase the many ingredients of and combine it to produce a perfect solution. Our love was entwined in this context. he didn’t think. ran or laughed. It has been polluted and turned into yet another commodity. We were judged on our recent sentiments. He could see only the stars and the sun and our evolution. but she knew it was true. Dominic could see through this. to fool us so we did not even love ourselves. He was of pagan origin and this may not have been received well. the exile that he was from humanity. It was an array of bright galaxies we could see over our heads. he had learnt. Dominic wanted no one to be with him. there were complaints and assessments. as he had travelled too far now. they performed well. It just meant he knew. We are lacking in description and meaning. in love and life. He found these goals that were common with all men. Now Dominic was not a saint or guru of light and love. It has been smeared and sold by those who seek to destroy us. the words we dared to utter. If there was no love involved. It had been named a fantasy. which makes our senses dance. his ‘mental illness’ sufficient to understand what was missing. we cannot seek it. its expression glamorised and turned into an obsession. This bears no resemblance to its essence or its source. yet for Dominic. putting up with situations he had no interest in and acting 80 . Dominic didn’t want her to be frightened by this assessment. but it was not. he thought that she could tell. which were based on recent events that were completed. He could see where it led and he wanted to go with its flow and outward to the sea. He wanted to lie down by Claudia’s side and rest for many years. he had little concept of her culture a rich and restrictive one. but he could see Claudia.
He looked in the mirror and he could not love what he saw. the other. He waited for Claudia. He didn’t want to share his space with someone and spend the rest of his time seeking out alternatives. This time he would try the real thing and test how it could be. to let go and release the other person. not a temporary solution. But the ancient Indian document. Dominic saw love as ownership and control to ensure one person gets what they require and in turn. fascinating as it is. from the imagination or belief or from a perception of external objects. This was the price we sometimes must pay for our opinion. Perhaps men do need a maid. It is for movement and for life. and be healthy and strong. we never refuse such a kind offer. to satisfy his quest and soul. People were frightened of losing what they had found. real or in solitude. where control was like a parent to a child. It was very common. Let them go and they will stay if they feel the same. but the strange thing was. or exist. He had taken so many lovers over many years. He didn’t even look for an opportunity. He thought he did. without this he could not love another person. Dominic needed a lover. he bought the book and read the instructions. All for love? Even Dominic stood confused. Why would he want to be. Dominic assumed no such thing. one was enough for him. not watch someone else or see it on a celluloid screen. He had to draw up a plan to leave with his head held high. He waited for her call from a new city and a new life. to get out of Czech and his misery. but extremely hard to practice and that was and still is. He waited for no one and he looked the other way. when he had no reason? This was his first task. 81 . This was how it was with Laura. This obsession had faded in this year’s autumn rain. But first he had to love himself again. He thought he needed this more than anything. He had tried this many times and it didn’t work. Dominic wanted love. Love can be acquired by habit. However. We do not need a carer or a nursemaid to put us to bed. when he had tried living in this world and didn’t like it much? It took him to places he didn’t want to go to and he met people he didn’t want to see. So states the greatest testament to love. A lowly caste is fine too. it was another system of division and hate. Dominic sent this sentiment with love to anyone who wanted to receive it.A Bohemian Fool with people he had no reason to be with. the Kama Sutra. was that it would be lost eventually. no housekeeper to clean our glasses from that smell of wine or wash our clothes. how could he? How could he love himself. He wanted to live love this time. unsure how to explain what he felt and what this was. He didn’t frequent the drunken palaces of hope. so insecure many of us were. assumes a high caste and many wives. which were misleading and false. Now he was without one for the first time. Surely we didn’t need this in exchange to avoid facing loneliness and someone to call our own. We do not look for cheap imitations. It was easy to say. This was not right.
he felt without control or purpose and that he was just wandering aimlessly from town to town and house to apartment looking for something he had lost. dismissed the world and its troubles. in the sky and translated into our hearts. Sometimes he thought that he didn’t know what he was doing. He bounced along full of vitality and energy. The daughter of air could not destroy him in his search to find Isis. We saw Venus move about the galactic sky in search of connections and liaisons. A wandering and lost soul and he thought he needed sometimes for someone to take him by the hand and keep him captive for a while just to stop this endless movement. What were we making of ourselves in this disconnected stupidity where we build in pain and sorrow which have nothing to do with their true form. This was not a reflection of our universe. Dominic had always been like this. We lived in the age where we did not understand its meaning. without seeing this mythical body that had deteriorated. It had to happen naturally in a cycle of intensity and calm and as the storms gathered. It is better to die alone than to live with someone who imposed rules upon your affection. Love is more. No birds with human heads to see. He stopped looking in the mirror. He didn’t feel good when he went out. He had been told many times of his Romany roots.Chapter 10 . They became heavier each trip. they could be ridden. His bright eyes were dimmed by time and sadness and his smile was fixed with a serious glare. Dominic followed Venus’s patterns.Laska a swollen eye surrounded by an ageing face with hair thin and lifeless. Our love was translated here in terms of ownership. as they were not his. He knew he didn’t look good anymore. he was not this man anyone needed. swollen and filled with delusion until it burst one day. So in the name of Eros and his love Psyche. a stream of consciousness that is neither negotiable nor open to interpretation. money and pain. his confidence had been wiped and he no longer believed in his presence and the swagger he once employed. a woman so gorgeous Aphrodite was jealous of her. there were no arrows to be fired in his mythical tale. He didn’t want a conditional version of reality that had no conversation with his sky. Dominic couldn’t perform accordingly to receive a kiss or touch of a hand. This was more a depiction of Dominic’s eye. for our hearts are merely reflections of the sky and mirror its form and condition. no despair or sorrow to share. still together. We aimed to own it. these names are beyond love and waited for him to come to them. holding hands as we glided through until we reached the other side. Our love is created in the stars. Dominic proclaimed affinity to these deities and symbols of love. But this time he owned all those objects and he carried them in a bag up and down four flights of stairs. The mind is a pathway to this sky. It is better to pay than to submit to this woeful version of friends and lovers. This was not a mirror of our sky. box it and sell it as a 82 . He needed to love within first.
we looked for it only in this form and it was never going to work for us. Dominic missed her so. and obliterated it all. none of it. She ran away and lied to be with him. as she couldn’t cope. She then systematically dismantled the family home. She moved house and then again and then threw an old man out onto the streets. This is loving too. He went back. Was it based on tears that flowed? Did Dominic’s tears tell him that he loved someone or was he a victim of someone? This cannot be love as he had seen. She was beautiful in every way. waiting to be activated. they wandered around Hampstead Heath in London. Before we all went to sleep we needed to know whether it was real or not. Dominic’s mother. But others who sought to stop its natural flow troubled this paradise. It had no meaning. we misread it constantly and accepted its spin offs. When Dominic met a girl at aged 17 he could think only of her. they were never allowed to be as one. this story. there were no alternatives. Then he became ill recently after 15 years of being with her. They hitched a ride in a truck to be together in another place. What she wanted always came before his health and well-being. It was real and they stole time to be together. Dominic took him in. Firstly in the name of love she destroyed any record of his past life with his first wife. he was only young. This is another level of perception in its truest form. It didn’t fit into their plans. not only felt. He went back for more. it was still ridiculous.A Bohemian Fool commodity. It was doomed from the start. yet it lives inside us all. He didn’t care for consequences and didn’t care why or how. yet he was not that ill. it was about other aspects too complicated to explain. The concept of gaining and losing love bore no relation to us. or whether it would be judged or categorised. this is not love. created a new order and the year zero began. She cried in his arms and she came deeper into his soul. She taught him many new things and took him to see new places. Pol Pot. As if it were something we hire to please us and discard. What was it that made people do this to each other in the name of love? Love is conditional on health too it seems. She immediately shipped him into a care home. It was not based on anything other than the selfish and wicked society we live in. They listened to music and sang the same 83 . the former Cambodian leader. he loved her more than his own life. and he wanted her to be with him. We sang about it as if it was another external form we could not control. Then it would be cruel and unwise for our souls. He looked longingly into her eyes. one day for hours. as described. They took her away to southern France and Menton. We are love so how can we lose it? Dominic’s father was old and his second wife has been quite the controlling force since the day she met him. her mind and her heart and her tales of life. like. he arrived with a carrier bag. But. If it would be demonised later on. Dominic would never believe in this concept of ‘on and off’ love as if it were a fashion. and when he held her hand he felt the entire force of love and its energy in the palm of his hand. this love we felt. It made no sense.
we would be alone. and we had to operate to fix these problems. It was nothing more than a sad illusion. It was love. playful and fickle soul and not his assets. nothing was as pure as this. It never worked. So fine and exquisite did it feel. on one dimension. If you looked for components only. but Claudia’s interest was not subject to this or his health or wealth or his experience or looks. it was Dominic she loved and his silly. But he knew he could have this love again. It was easy to see in him. No. This first love is named as such and regarded as irrelevant in many ways but the first impact is harsh on a new and unsuspecting child of love. It only lasted six months and it seemed like six years. He knew after this. There was silence sometimes as he wanted her too much and he didn’t know what to do. he thought. Then if you are love. She warmed to him and him to her. as he had met someone who didn’t see the world this way. you have no chance of finding anything other than misery and you will only be frustrated. and he suspected she saw through him. to love yourself. the formation and design. we were told. But we were encouraged to honour the body. If she loved him. he went from one to another but didn’t love them. It is as simple as this. she loved him too. Dominic could always command something he was sure. It never came. you attract love. 84 . Dominic now believed this was the answer. he sought temporary satisfaction and switched off from the love of himself. But this was nonsense.Laska song. She could see further than the missing hair on his head. He lost himself in many parties and lovers but didn’t find this way again. they shared their worlds and they shared their dreams. If we were not able to fit this criteria. only in other forms. It was in its original form this love they had. He was exposed to this love and he could not now pretend otherwise. He came from a position of pure hope and found someone who was pure in heart and mind. he had lost the art as he had closed himself off and started to think of aspects that were only expressions of and were not based on feelings. what was possible and looked endlessly in case it was her again. to suit the order of the day. Dominic was lucky perhaps. This loss was one he didn’t recover from easily as if his entire life’s hope had evaporated in a moment. Dominic knew. or his advantage in this commercial world. He looked in the wrong way. ‘Beside you’ by Van Morrison.Chapter 10 . and praise the right shaped hips. It was as pure as it could be. he could see through this in her. He sought replacements and immediate reinforcements. We were deluded with our fortune and love solely being based on our physical look and what we have to offer in monetary terms.
When Dominic was young. and the east embraced western values at the same time. their pride intact and continued along their way. he sought to bridge this gap. There were casualties and there were those who refused to see the temporary status of progress and clung onto its values and feelings. but we were cast apart. they were distant and did not share common aims. we talked less. They were either fickle or discontented as they were swept along on its journey. As it faded they hitched a ride back to mainstream society. which focused on general issues. He had stopped trying. and they were lost. We could not imagine us all being together. this was a familiar pattern. as one faction after another surfaced. In the subsequent legends that evolved. The civil rights campaigns were orchestrated and organised. 85 . the paraphernalia of these movements were embraced by mainstream culture some ten years later without their meaning and essence. The war in South East Asia consolidated its position but did not inspire its birth no more than psychedelic drugs. we were told that an area of San Francisco gave birth to the hippy movement and the southern states. as advocated by Harvard University professors. it offered little in the way of reality. the civil rights movement. Where these fads and sub cultures emerge from is unclear as they take root and grow so quickly from some source. We were separated from our families as they spread across the world. We were becoming separate. It was symptomatic of the society we lived in. This differed considerably to the peace and love movement. The subcultures that grew in the early 1960’s presented to the world a different perspective and a few radical alternatives.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 11 . We grew up apart and yet we had the same experiences and had so many similarities to share.Bratrsky Our brothers were scattered far and wide. across oceans and although we could communicate better than before. During this time it was notable that. political in nature. did. in retrospect. how quickly people were swayed to its sound. Lone dissenting voices spoke out and were eventually silenced or assimilated. they seemed so far from us in thought and ideas in this time. The latter being a political response to a social situation. Seen through the rose coloured eyes of video bites with famous lines and images played repeatedly. apart and living thousands of kilometres away from each other. The youth were responsible for this splurge of colour and ascension to eastern spiritual philosophy. they were quite different in form. They were born from repression and the need to change everyday life.
Civil disobedience was dealt with harshly and if ridicule was not effective. Its survivors were thought to have contracted illnesses with excessive drug use. We competed against each other for everything and should we have found a common cause we were in these times ridiculed and broken. There were groups that formed. It was the same as voting for change in a classic sense. pyramid based organisations. some political and religious. There are many questions that arise. It deterred us from uniting and whilst we were separate from our families and our common goals we were easily managed. But we were so apart in our thinking and we were thrown apart by design as we fought for the resources and debt available to us. violence always was. Since this time there was less and less dissent. before too many people rejected the model we were obliged to follow. it was suggested that this was due to the lowering standards of education and the ease at which young people. there were many theories from the charitable to the occult. basically.Chapter 11 . they were probably the last known versions of man uniting for a purpose on such a grand scale. for many reasons. This was a tried and reliable technique.Bratrsky Both these two groups existed throughout the same period of time. but these were long over. at least had values of hope and promoted love between each other. The dissenting mob had been created in the historical past for good reason and valid notions of being discontent but were then utilised to further a differing agenda. became well known through literature and they had existed for hundreds of years. but it remained local and was easily broken. There were days of solidarity in unions too. had become docile and unmoved by the issues of their time. It is always about the perspective we are looking from. It took on astral forms and opened up a world to a generation that had been the product of global conflict. although quite naive. they were dismantled and exposed. their special handshakes and their secret structures were visible but were not debated or considered. savage society that we lived in. some to further specific goals. occasionally. It was infiltrated to inspire its collapse. There were. This was paramount to this shift. and why was there no longer the need to think of alternatives in this clearly. The peace movement from the past. These brotherhoods indoctrinated men to see their world from a specific perspective. It was witnessed on many occasions in many places. There 86 . Its virtue dismissed as unachievable and childlike in concept. who joined such movements in the past. but it seemed they always developed with some other purpose than stated. Masonic lodges and freemasonry were notable versions. social groups who formed out of necessity to fight an injustice. how did these groups form and how were they popularised. The mystical groups. These societies promoted hatred and incited discord sometimes. Its concepts were so easy to adopt and quickly spread across the western globe like a bush fire to Europe and Australasia and further. Their true purpose was unclear.
he continued. then this fraternal group certainly did not include us. Saxony is open too. The cartels of bankers were said to link directly into these elitist groups. Rousseau’s social contract of 1762 set out to determine how men could form as a group yet still preserve their basic freedom. His brothers were all busy this particular weekend and after cancelling his social activities for a second time. The people who gained from the fall of the just. exploited these concepts. The weekend showed Dominic another side to the world of solitude. he did not speak to anyone face to face. religion or creeds. This order is outshone by the true nature of things and this is independent of human convention. but this must be equal as natural law renders human laws as ineffective with men. therefore. We could have easily helped each other without greed or the need for hunger. these borders would have been shut immediately to eradicate any threat to the nation states. We were excluded from membership and we were not party to its aims. but why was there a change? What was the purpose of free movement and mass migrations? Should the threat of terrorism have been real. But its existence did not determine what it should do in terms of preservation. Whenever the peoples of the world meet there are no problems. he was left sitting. as people can always get along with each other. but these boundaries were falling. The concept that everyone invested all his or her power together under the direction of the common will was a noble one. we would never fight against each other unless we were orchestrated to do so. look on and not understand its transgression. there became free movement which was wonderful. despite it never being its original purpose. To the north. unless they designed it. A short time ago. Then suddenly. the group had been given life and thus by legislation it would be given movement and will. The United States was the premier model and now Europe and Australia had followed. so clearly exerted influence. this was beyond doubt. they were used to fuel conflict. our masters. They had historically been inspirational in major changes and political upheavals. would be a part of the whole group. Like Marx. It is known that we. a 87 . it was not a coincidence that suddenly the world was opened and its borders taken away.A Bohemian Fool were links to other secret societies which was suggested formed the shape and layout of the ruling elite. The majority would ignore this. After years of restrictive movement. Each person. The nationalistic boundaries did not denote races. The border near Karlovy Vary is some 30-minute drive and became unmanned now to the west. He concluded. his work was cited and utilised as a basis for change. By uniting the group. But our masters forbid this. If this structure was real and we were controlled by such secret groups of hidden men who were behind the world’s woes and achievements. Justice comes from God and we cannot receive such a high inspiration. you can enter Bavaria without question or reason. it was impossible to leave this country. There exists a universal justice born from reason.
Yet when Dominic arrived in Prague there was no nonsense. then we had to place our liquid bottles into plastic bags and we could not take alcohol into Australia. why were troops from Britain there anyway? Dominic could not see a reason. not millions yet. He didn’t tune into any specific thoughts or become interested in anything he saw. It just became worse. Keep the currency.Bratrsky lone figure waving from a top floor room at anyone who would look his way. it was said by many Czech 88 . questions and straight faces. The news was the same in England. this ludicrous and endless checking. Perhaps they were preparing a foothold for the future war with China? Iraq was a more tangible location albeit an equally stupid one from this era.Chapter 11 . The USA offered a whole new level of idiocy. They looked at his passport. There was only a handful that year. as it was the last time he went home. The same old infiltration by people which ignored the truth and stopped it ever getting out. We looked on. It was reported in the same patronising manner and still it didn’t stop the killing. There were stories of people being detained for hours for no reason as they dared to go on holiday there. Officers of the armed forces spoke out against this phoney war. but it never stopped. take away a few zeros and keep the banks independent. “So we do not become another bankrupt country at the mercy of the international Banking cartels”. since the towers in New York were imploded. Were they helping plant poppy seeds for next year’s bumper heroin crop? What exactly were they doing apart from securing some dirt tracks and mountains roads? It was not even spoken about. that was based solely on the pretence of security. He watched two of the top four in the league easily defeat the opposition. and the time before that. this campaign. Eye scans and finger printing. It empowered the idiots. as women emptied their handbags out and handed over nail scissors at every airport that year. He watched some football from England. There was no logic to this. There were three only in one week in Afghanistan. Things seemed to work satisfactorily. this meaningless nonsense. It still went on at this time. it was stated. He didn’t think the country was put at risk by there not being draconian measures to harass the general population. One million civilians were dead. They were placed into large boxes never to be seen again. but to be honest it was boring as he thought that it was no longer much of a competition. he could see it in Czech. there were no glances or suspicious looks. It was armistice Sunday again and this acknowledgment of those that died on behalf of this country happened every year in the same hypocritical fashion. His suitcase was collected and he left the airport. and this was for what reason? To capture Sumer and Babylon again? We had never had our intelligence insulted quite as much. It was very dull and yet Dominic once loved watching this game. At one airport shoes were to be scanned and this was all in the name of security. The Czechs were too hasty in joining the band of clones into political and economic harmony with the rest of Europe. they were fighting terrorists who didn’t even exist.
It was not a problem for him to setup here in this small city. she told him she was no longer his wife whilst she hid behind a wardrobe door. he would rather be by himself. Dominic no longer trusted women. It. really. but at least the guard changed more regularly now. Somehow. he still didn’t wish to. He told them all his troubles. Not all Czechs knew the Russians were still there. Dominic was not allowed to see. He was told not to cry over a woman and to think of a new life. It was a cruel method of deceit that instigated a tyrannical and insane period in his life. times and dates which all seemed quite clear. His medicine was poison but it was a better poison than some. ridiculed and there were sniggers in the background when he called. Some people needed friends in their life. the government there took this country exactly down the road they knew was not the right one for the Czech people. he kept everyone at arm’s length. They spent lots of roubles too. He was despised and named as the one chosen to fall. in many ways felt good to be cut off from this barrage of information thrown at us daily. the stories deliberately constructed to confuse everyone. she said. To be honest not one person had any idea what was going on there. they felt exposed without it. he found himself making friends with Jim. but with what? The lies and the misleading statements? He had heard enough by then. Dominic could have still kept in touch if he chose. he liked one thing that covered all the possibilities. He went from one day being a part of life to the next where he was on the other side. It cured all. He didn’t know anyone and sadly. Then we can discuss the last time we did this and the next time we are going to do it all over again. If only he had cooperated. He always recalled key moments such as receiving an email in an empty house whilst his son slept one Saturday morning.A Bohemian Fool nationals. Dominic scorned at the futility of his culture. but he had become as guilty as the next man. but he loathed inane conversations and drunken exchanges which could be funny on some occasions but on a regular basis. he liked to be with people sometimes but more often than not. Dominic was not one of these. He was laughed at. He had not realised that he had something to fear. Jack and James during his stay in Karlsbad. It was a mystical tale he told and it seemed completely unreal. Actually. regardless of any logic that might have prevailed. This was because they had no control. When he went to Dubai. Dominic had always been a loner. quite dull. He was not anti-social. become too much to withstand and especially when life has taken its toll on an individual such as Dominic. as crazy as the life Laura now lived. He had lost his friend and didn’t care if Laura called herself his wife. Plans were made. Our social life invariably involved drinking copious amounts of alcohol in drinks we sup one after the other. If only he had 89 . The change was too much for him and no wonder he went quite mad. He didn’t need this type of escape. The constant supply of disinformation. getting dressed.
How would he pay for his flight and who would come and say goodbye. the minute he stepped off the plane back in Australia. Dominic realised that his children needed him. but he couldn’t stay and do this. he did absolutely nothing about any of it. but he did nothing but suffer and couldn’t lend a hand. It was too hard for him and he felt as if he had let them down.Bratrsky not done this or said this. Dominic did nothing. his stomach disorders. But. He was ready for any new ordeals. He knew that they were older now and had coped very well. he didn’t respond well to this and he abandoned them too. As a parent he knew this was not good. But the new moon was in his sign and it was meant to cause a stir. He hoped they would forgive him one day. nothing serious. Something could happen and he might need to run. as the concept would have sank off the coast. he would not need this. he didn’t have the resources to fly again. but he needed to contact the heart company and tell them there might be a delay. for a recovery. He had to wait and see but it was altering his plans. he wanted them to have some too. Dominic started to consider leaving. He could only surmise. as the stars had written in a script for him. his new heart in a heart shaped box that was set to arrive about this time. They became removed from reality and wild in their intent as if nothing no longer mattered to them either. it was he that apparently did it all. This year he would 90 . He could only hypothesise now and hoped nothing got in their way as they had suffered unnecessarily. he hoped. Perhaps. his old one could be repaired and he would be able to carry on. But to run away from his new sanctuary to assist the needs of his son or his daughter was not an option at this time. he had the clothes to negotiate its dry burning sensation. as if some illfated event was going to shake his bones. He knew it would be too cold to go out for his warm blood. this he was less sure of. as he had started to find some sanity. They would ask why and he would not be able to say. He had to find a way too. He had to wait until he was better to continue this journey that seemed to have paused on the last frame. his bronchitis and he hoped his peace would slowly descend upon him. He didn’t know what form this would take. it was in his mindset suddenly.Chapter 11 . He could not keep blaming Laura for all that she did to the family. He wanted this no more. he dreamed. This was the problem. But he had scheduled a delivery by bird from Peru. He took the road that she did and left them alone. Maybe. How he could leave and when and what would he say and do? He had not reached this far in his thinking. he had to think it all through as soon as he could. Christmas was coming soon and the previous year he was in the sunshine. He was tired. In the meantime he would sleep and nurture his repaired eye. He chased it down for a few weeks but when he saw this major change he could not do anything but say that Laura had lost her family that illfated day.
The previous year he wrote of loneliness and this year he would write of Claudia. They remained fundamentally dishonest despite twenty years of freedom. It is the most important one who gives us light. It was a disappointing aspect to the mentality of the people. as our intestine is too long for such texture. they were proud of their nationality. but Dominic had two and he was not proud of either. But this was a town where Dominic lived and he could not complain. It’s just another deity based on the giver of light and heat. A foolish notion among many. they still acted in a devious manner to avoid detection. They assumed all foreigners were fools. Dominic lived in the land of pork and dumplings and hearty stews he had no desire for. They were proud to be meat eaters as if we needed this and it made us strong.A Bohemian Fool be cold. It was clear that no one would ever say that it was time for him to travel along this way. he couldn’t insult or question the tradition of the local people by showing them how it could be elsewhere. The warmth she gave him and the rays he accepted on his skin were never part of a worship of one who is so named as such. it had to filter out of their mentality. 91 . the god of Vitamin D. Dominic stood waiting for direction now. It was where the local people thought it quite acceptable to attempt to add more money to the bill and give less change in many places. It was strange how people who had been oppressed reacted after their release. that robbing guests was deemed a suitable occupation.
life. It wore us all down over time. Tony had tried to reach him repeatedly on his mobile phone. In his desperation he asked Dominic to help. who was more a reliable woman who was more mature than the two young men. What was that all about. but to take a holiday from oneself was not an easy thing to do. so Dominic said he would call her and see what he could do. Dominic suggested calling his other friend. we all thought to ourselves privately? It flashed past us and then we discovered that we had travelled from the cradle to the grave in rapid time without meaning or purpose. his friend. Dominic called Sally and made arrangements for her to go shopping for him. this was problematical as Dominic was over a thousand kilometres away in Czech. The necessity to have faith in your teacher was hard for western thinkers as it required believing in a man. no different than Evangelists in the Christian realm. Tony could hardly walk to the kitchen to make himself food. They perceived it as getting ready for the inevitable outcome. it was a strange situation. as she was busy. There were some probably who were worth listening to. who was designated as his carer and paid an allowance for performing this task by the British government had gone missing.Rovnost Tony called early in the morning. The Tibetan version of the Buddhist faith focused very much on preparing for death and saw this as paramount to this life. it automatically went to his answer-phone. when he worked with Dominic and they went to New York on business. Tony said that this wasn’t the first time Matt had disappeared. He called again later on and spoke of past times. It seemed logical to prepare for something like this. however enlightened he might be. that Tony called his friends. He never answered. it took him ten to fifteen minutes to do so. He had no food in the house.Rovnost Chapter 12 .Chapter 12 . this was not such a problem when Tony could get out. Tony was extremely happy with the outcome. but now this was a serious issue. but many were profiteers. He said. He cried as he described the strange relationship he had with Matt. Yes there was the pain and sorrow. he apologised for calling so early. He often didn’t contact him for several weeks. that he didn’t want to disturb her. He knew this was why older people were so miserable. Dominic having to organise food for someone so far away. Dominic thought that he needed a long holiday to recoup and recover from the drudgery and monotony of life in these times. but we were frustrated and then found ourselves close to death without having resolved issues or having made use of our time and as people we wanted more than this. He was not able to leave the house to shop or buy cigarettes. but he needed to speak to Dominic urgently. his friend. Things had become a bit of a mess. 92 .
our world. when we retired we could contemplate the stars. We were taught to scorn at the prospect. a fine one. looking 93 . Dominic had spent three days without commitment. which felt very much like a wheel we went round on. If the society we shared was based on real values and not false idols. We all came from this earth. For many it was the same. It was always a new way to deal with an old problem. but Dominic couldn’t afford his wages and his high supermarket bills. having to eat the dinner again the next night and then again for lunch the next day was horrible. there was no return from this descent. It was productive and was fitting in the workplace. Dominic’s standard had to drop again for the thirteenth time that year. We were always planning. What for and what purpose he dared not to even think about it. we are born here and die here. There was no reason why this was not possible. Perhaps it was all conjecture and also encompassing in only one moment. He had no replacement and so he was nibbling so delicately. until we considered our structured life. We knew in our hearts that we were equal and we knew we could have this happy ending. another one on this perpetual calendar. Dominic dismissed the chef. he wished he could buy a whole new set to arrive in.A Bohemian Fool We have equality. the kids grown up or until we had sufficient funds to aid retirement. the one we had little control over. He slipped slowly down the ski jump and one day he fell off the end. It was more of a reality than we thought or believed. but he took this home with him and mixed the two together. until our house was paid off. It filled our time adequately and kept us from considering anything of relevance. making plans and completing jobs. He could not quieten this mind of his. It was Monday again. he said and wanted to stay. He liked it here. producing new ideas. He seemed upset to go. We had to wait always. For Dominic this was too late. It was not some utopian dream someone had one sunny afternoon in a park whilst reading a science fiction novel or some drug induced concept. as he had this concept of starting again. Whilst we were all busy. he had enough of the same old fare. Our equality was not based on material goods or money. despite everything and everyone. there was no time for ourselves. We thought it was just a children’s story with a happy ending. When he was no longer ill he intended to invite him back and see if he would cook again. the mice analogy. It was never enough for him to complete the endless tasks he had to complete. we had this despite it seeming as if it had to be on an inequitable base. but somehow we forgot to consider how we would feel and why we were here on this blue planet. aspirations and output we could have lived our life equally too. He woke in the morning sometimes with a new concept or a different way of doing things. He was throwing out his clothes too. He had this mentality of getting things done. always stretching to new possibilities. as he never was able to. one world was a figment of our imagination as we had given away any connection to it through fear and ignorance.
it was a special one. she decided that Dominic was out of shape and needed to go to the gym. the boy from London exiled in Australia for twenty years. Dominic’s body was neither lean nor gross. It tormented Dominic. Dominic had persistently refused to conform to the norms of their society. but not initially. The fact he had no skills and was illiterate mattered little.Rovnost fresh. It was cruel to do this to him. A new set of rules was implemented by Laura to fit a new lifestyle. in Czech. including friends and family. as if he needed to belong to her. he didn’t understand her meaning from the things she said. firstly because. there was a language issue as Claudia spoke Hebrew as her first. to take everything from him like that. so hilarious they found it. he knew she had already finished work before he had even began. but she no longer listened. he thought. he was wondering what it was that she wanted from him. when values changed so did perceptions. It is therefore not surprising he felt so lost and without hope. he didn’t know her that well. He had already lost his children to the natural process of growing up. there was no guilt either on Laura’s side. He no longer belonged anywhere. Dominic knew however good it was. then. Dominic was relieved he was unable to as the requests were bizarre and came from a deranged mind. Why did anyone want to do such terrible things to him? He had asked this question too many times. Others dreamed of such a family as this. Laura thought it was a major achievement to capture a man half her age. Dominic deserved it.Chapter 12 . Dominic told Laura and she saw this drop in altitude. It was important for his vision of it all. she thought differently than he did. Laura was always overweight herself and at times it was worse than others. They needed to shape things together in Dominic’s eyes. Dominic knew she would allow him to contribute to the shape of things. Previously no such things were ever discussed. it was still another illusion. he lost everything else overnight. He did not think anyone deserved this level of destruction. was a crime. He was from nowhere. he felt. so it was perceived as punishment. and secondly. Dominic thought of Claudia. He hoped she could see his sentiment. This would not be possible. let alone him. Everyone went along for the ride. but he could at least eject those rags that were old and boring. those who knew them laughed intensely. Sometimes. He had no home and he had not much left in terms of everything else. not anywhere and certainly not the place of his birth. His mother was younger than Laura. He fell literally from the sky. he needed to eat with his right hand only in the Muslim tradition and stop looking so old. Despite all of this it didn’t seem to be much of a problem. and it was. as if somehow. When Laura met her Algerian lover. 94 . Not there. He might have more room for more important things when he left. He could not compete with a man half his age it seemed.
To lose it was catastrophic. but he still thought they were as good as him. the only reason they were allowed was because it was her wedding. who recounted this tale. agree with the party or be thrown out of the party. but this time he felt it would be good as he was better now. He was ill. She had an aunt who lived in the USA and she sent her $100 to spend in this shop. Dominic had always perceived that everyone was equal despite being told otherwise. He wrote to his daughter an email where he asked her to try to understand that despite everything. It was too hard for him last time. The secret police watched them and visited their house on many occasions. She spoke of a shop named Turex that only took foreign currency. This was because of her father’s dismissal from the party. Girls dreamed of shopping there. many people lost their lives failing to comply with the darker aspects of Soviet rule. Young and sexy. he didn’t try to stop as he had truly had enough. and was forced to move town as he lost his job. Dominic thought that his children blamed him for not controlling the darkening face of Laura. but small city had helped him recover and that he was joining his friend and that only he knew. but he no longer could. Dominic’s student displayed a deep resentment and bitterness telling this tale. he said. as this was open only to party members. She also worked for a travel agents but she was not allowed to deal with overseas bookings. The storyteller had a father who was thrown out of the party as he tried to care for others. He had done so. The karmic debt now owed by their mother was not one Dominic could address. She had to leave her passport at the border and it took months and months to obtain permission to go. only local ones. He never understood this inequality in men. She was terrified as a child. not open for him. He told her that this great.A Bohemian Fool After work Dominic went and sat in the Zigzag bar. He saw women for every occasion. he did still care and that what had happened. intellectual and sexy and just out and out sexy. but for others. Whilst having a couple of beers he pondered on a story he was told earlier about life in the communist days. a life threatening event. Such was the choice. was not able to attend high school. She didn’t reply. He was very ill for some time. he did judge others. How excited she was when she went there. he just couldn’t see it. naturally. He asked for forgiveness at his lack of availability. He had hoped that her and her brother would be fine again and he was coming back to assist when he could. but she said it kept their family close together throughout. one that was full of beautiful women. On her honeymoon she went to Yugoslavia and then onto Venice. He chose the latter. he was as shocking as anyone. He was given a choice. yes. and it sold jeans and clothes from Western Europe. Czech people. His wife lost hers and the daughter. A party member was a useful position to obtain as it offered certain privileges. It couldn’t be ignored and she 95 . not at this time and probably not ever.
it was a moment of pure selfishness. It was strange for a man who was never violent to think this way. as it couldn’t be controlled. She would not in this life. he thought. How he dreamed of this moment when he held her neck so tight and watched the air drain from her body.Rovnost couldn’t run from this. so bad no one believed the story he could tell. She would never see this in her life. It slowed his recovery as he squandered chance after chance thinking about her deeds. Dominic was moving on. It was a shameful act. but he couldn’t say this for his children as they lost their mother that day. It was not a question of having a choice to move on.Chapter 12 . It was always someone else’s to deliver a mortal blow. as there was nothing that was tangible to forgive. He wished it were true. he mourned for the loss of a friend who before this 96 . It left them all exposed in every way. he knew. he wanted to kill her. But. It was real and so there was much at stake which was lost that day in the supermarket when Laura was exposed to herself and fell for a peasant boy. he suggested and his reason to forget. Dominic said good riddance to rubbish in the time-honoured form. He would not forget or forgive. something that would remind her that it was not right to mess with basic attributes and confine others to suffering. But this was a sour waste of energy and should not have been his role. he knew. How sad that day was for them. but he prayed that something one day would be addressed. took care of each other and not one who pretended how it was. and he really had never felt this way before. but he didn’t believe this. whilst watching that foul mouth close for the final time. But this was a terrible thing to dream and a terrible thing to consider. Dominic’s anger demanded that she should suffer too. But he carefully monitored their actions and their love had drained elsewhere. There was no need to do what she did and then pretend it was his fault as it was never this. but he was put into a life threatening position and he didn’t know what to do. she had suffered enough this time and this is what inspired her song. leaving the three family members lost and confused. the look of regret and the mortified feeling that tore the family apart. They would never speak again. It was not right that she had won this war of attrition she started. There were no excuses for this ever. Dominic could not deny there was anger and he couldn’t be humble and discuss with Laura anything ever again. This was not right in any time or place. he would never forget the faces. He was told the children were over it. he hoped. There needed to be punishment and it was his job to bring justice. He wanted to bring equality to her life so it fitted his. but he felt as if it was understandable as her deeds were too bad to know. It was silly. this tale of hope. slowly but surely. It was her legacy. luckily he was able. but it turned into a nightmare. their actions said other things. which was always allowed. He needed retribution for this horrendous crime and he fantasised repeatedly. They were a family who loved each other.
but the same type of people could be seen. his loss was so complete there was nothing left to hold onto. 97 . but it was just where we were looking at things from inside the machine. He would bomb it if he had the ability and wipe away the memory. He had struggled to come to terms with this devastating blow. knew he would never be able to do this. couples planning and conspiring to achieve something somehow. He was looking for some love. He found the troubled who propped themselves up with tablets to control their mood and condition. They struggled to make it through the mire whilst holding a flower. He went to Carlsbad and he didn’t know why. as you do not know what to do. the radiation sickness of persons who are fundamentally uninhabited. He was a man who was kind and had a heart to share. which once crossed meant there was no going back. But when you are trapped in a madhouse and you do not know what to do? What do you do? Fantasise destruction in response. it had to be clear in his one good eye. It was not his feeling to be anymore than of use. No one took Dominic seriously. All those who had known him. They could easily be the same as Dominic and Laura. This was a great loss to Dominic. He was moved from place to place. He knew this before. But in every dark day there is always light you can see if you look hard enough. He had no will to carry it through. so it should not have been a shock. not then or ever. as this was what he was shown. but things seemed the same in many ways. He was in a weird and foreign place perhaps. He found many things he never wanted to see. it was just another illusion. He was sensitive and hoped you all fair well as he knew how difficult this life could be. No more running from himself and his sick reality and his hatred of those who came from this place. no longer could tell the difference. Laura had crossed a line. exposed and bare. The same game with a different accent and language. despite not being subjected to any callous behaviour. he. And in these terrible times. He had never been down this road before and he was looking for a different way now. He would show them no mercy.A Bohemian Fool was kind and forgiving and had time for her family. He didn’t understand why. He was given no opportunity to quickly put on a robe. One we swore by and identified with. He was stripped and stood naked. He was not allowed time to adjust to the ever changing mood of what Laura suddenly wanted. He found uncertain things and those who were stable he couldn’t see either. Dominic struggled to see this light. He would poison their water to bring equality. he was looking for some understanding and he wouldn’t take no for an answer or just running away as an excuse. Wherever you came from would not change the game. He knew. It was not about Karlovy Vary or anywhere. The next move had to be certain. it mattered little where we were. He came across circus acts that couldn’t spell A to Zee. It rendered everything meaningless and all those years that passed him by. he saw things that were coloured when they had seemed so black and white.
for we knew it would only bring happiness and permission to buy and sow. This was not the best thing to do. The ice was layered on the slopes of our discontentment. But Dominic would take no temporary solution. He wanted to kiss and hold her until dawn forced her out of his bed.Chapter 12 . It was a mistake to think Dominic’s kindness was his inability to be ruthless. even though we stood tall. It was the only one he could see. this was our equality. There was no rhyme or reason that could explain a lonely word that is shared daily with every look we could give. so it seemed pointless to consider such things. it was all there was and there was nothing more to say. finally. He had had this explained to him before and still he didn’t understand. But this was not the case this time.Rovnost We had the right to offer our labour and without it we would starve. when winter came earlier we hated its premature call. for it was only this moment he could contemplate on. as we would be alone and then gone quite soon. it was clear as a bright sunny day. but these days were rare in Europe in November for the sky had a distant look. He longed to walk with her along the eastern sands. It was not one that could be negotiated or perceived in another way. We had to wait for winter now. He was as capable as he needed to be. Is it true that love and life is superfluous to a trip around a new moon. it was coming later each year. so nice the day and so warm the night. We had to offer our ethical ideas and finely tune them. He knew. We could squirm and struggle as we all did and had always done living off our time. We could give everything. This was the changing season of our time and we would not look for reason or meaning. When we were finished we needed to recover but the mother of survival teased us and tempted us to offload our learned feelings. as we were too lazy to re-hire the chef and cook for ourselves. at other times he played the fool. far more enigmatic and he did not show his hand unless he was required to. If we lived two or three hundred years. as he would wait this time for Claudia. but now its delay was careful not to cause an early fall. Dominic asked not to be told what it was. and only Dominic could meet someone 98 . We were scheduled to be back sooner than we could imagine. She would not be willing to leave but he would play with her until she agreed to go. to offer some more of our time. here and everywhere. Maybe. you could plant some seeds for our future and ones we didn’t even know. we could plan for the future quite merrily and sit and consider our time ahead and not look back or down. his love that waited for him in warmer climes that gave to him something he failed to really understand. ones we had eaten. He was lucky. so nice the moment. he finally had worked this out. So would we agree then. this confused us. It was changing and this was enough. We presented to ourselves a monologue of drivel and an empty can of beans. something we could share. but its unavoidable this commitment that is delivered to us.
His departure would not be dramatic or cause a large storm. she said how he could make her happy. this was enough for him. it was something indescribable to the mortals who despaired. to find and discover where it was hidden whilst she played her loving game. They frown for their lack of love. It was enough for any person who needed to stand on their own two feet. Never be sad he was leaving. It is beating just in case there is love for her. if only she would stay the same. Dominic knew Claudia was vulnerable to certain aspects he had seen. there were things that inspired him to do better this life around. in some ways and not in others. it would be easy for him and for others who saw this soul drift away and slowly slip away and say goodbye. He would sail away gently on a calm sea mapped out for him in advance and this would show his equality to everyone he ever knew. It was this fortune that gave him faith in who he was. it would be nice to go. 99 .A Bohemian Fool like Claudia on a night like his and survive the fall. he would say. untouched by others who wanted to know why. Some had gone and some would stay. it outlines his emotion and leaves him without doubt. as it expresses this motion. When he came close to Claudia. Dominic had no problem with leaving. which comes their way and there was no talk of desire. With what Dominic wanted there was not much to discuss or even inquire. She would not tire of this magnitude or this love that is endless and complete. He would be only there for a time. and this time there surely was. but he already knew. but good to cast off this restrictive body and mind. She was more than this. It was waiting for her. he left his fears and body behind. it is so simple this existence. We are here and then we go and then return. He was you and she was Dominic for maybe one moment. He was coming only to love. He had no answers to this or other silly thoughts. he could do the things she always wanted day after day. He would not be coming for hatred and this will not blind his ebb and flow. she could be this. He would find you again. but he would sail away into the sunset on a western shore. He was this person this time but only this time and he would return again. This is another subject where we can only swing our head without doubt. and to kiss her this time. but this gave him a moment to hold her. see through her and touch her exposed heart. sad to leave.
the previous week. Dominic’s concept of time told him that this linear approach had to end. He appeared humble and he needed to be careful what he did and said as things were likely to happen and he didn’t want to get involved in any of this. He suspected this would not be possible. This parallel universe he existed in offered both sides simultaneously. He would be forced to join in the affray. It was not in his control as he drifted out from its effect and haste. but only when he could see it. How or when he was not sure. he took an observation point from afar.Hlupak Dominic felt as though there was some symmetry occurring in his life. Since then. He was cast out only to soon return. there was always a celestial purpose that combined a number of things. would he be free of its pain. He couldn’t explain why this should happen to him at this time. But. It sounded as if he was a false prophet speaking. but came it did in some form which blew away any remnants of distrust he had or any doubts lingering in the far reaches of his mind. He had been so locked in this two-year monumental contract he was unable to see the road. He looked to numbers and time. This might culminate in some event that would come quite soon and then everything would change again. The next new moon when it appeared would cry out and cite the beginning of the end of the worst period and the best period in his life for some time. hopefully.Hlupak Chapter 13 . he was deeply disturbed and he knew it. it was a process of returning east. It functioned on many different levels too. There was a two-year period that was about to end in the January. He needed to reach out of this narrow perspective and view more. He was not sure where it was coming from. He was regaining this intuition he once had and it was leading him back this way to work through his fear and in his attempt to get back to Claudia. So near and so far had he been to and from himself. It seemed he was 100 . His indifference derived from his duality.Chapter 13 . release it and watch it drift away. albeit a long one. He’d felt it for the first time. Hermes had to tell Dominic where he had to go next and with whom he had to speak. He was feeling somewhat exposed again. as he had lost his sense to know. as if he had a vision and could predict the future with accuracy and precision accordingly. It took him to the gates of the city wall. so it seemed he didn’t care. since he was left alone and in this time there had been a casting out to the furthest point west toward the end of last year. he looked to pin things into places to bring some order to his chaotic life. skating along the rim of the oceans from where he could have easily drowned. This started and ended a period which obviously had to come. and from where he might have seen the sky. He would prefer to avoid it. where Hermes waited for him. He certainly felt this sometimes. he predicted. He had been quite sad for two years.
but add preparation when he could be bothered to do it. but not because he was attempting a coup. Forty or so people 101 . Dominic was getting use to being lonely. he laughed at whatever it was that was said. If he went out he still sat alone or with others. But this was not his concern really. he didn’t need a captive audience to preach his gospel songs. He would have been given the classification of dissident. as there was no one to share this view with or speak of the day that passed. He was driving up to Nova Role this day to a glass factory where he taught two marketing personnel.A Bohemian Fool opening up to another event for which he had no bearing to call on and therefore no way to resolve it. He dreamed of things he didn’t want to do. and a bit of travel. His motivation before was based on getting away and being alone. The sharp bend took him out of the local area. More due to his indifference on matters outlined as important. It no longer mattered what he thought about this and that. it had been such a long day. He learnt this night what he had missed out on the previous weekend with the march to ‘welcome winter’. He didn’t think he would have been a good member of the party here. he didn’t need a reason to teach. He took the left turn at a roundabout and moved along a windy road until he reached the glasshouse inside another soviet housing estate. Dominic nodded and smiled. That was over nine hours. The suburb he passed through was not pleasing to the eye. as he had to go and teach for a total of 6 hours. He crossed three train lines one after the other and the security man waved and spoke to him in Czech. he was never sure about. He could hold their attention for 90 minutes and the match was not won or lost. the whole day lasted from 1015 until 1930. He may have felt one thing one day and on a different day another. but he had not worked full time for two years and it always wore him out. in fact it was very Soviet. and into air that smelt fresher and he could see fields and new houses that looked attractive. This was not pre-empting his destiny. He suspected he might have taken a fall. but no one would know. He felt his eyes becoming heavy in the last class this day. or else fail once again to complete a task he set out to achieve and reach a special goal. whom. had dinner and were locked in the pub until dawn dancing and drinking. This was becoming tiresome and he wanted to relax somehow. They travelled to a nearby ski resort and walked for many kilometres. Yes there were breaks in between. he had to adjust his words for them to understand. but it seemed he had to finish the things he was doing before this time. he spent so much time alone. He could actually feel this pain inside of him. It was quite different as he went through patches and seasons without any input from above. It was functional and nothing more. He met his students. He had no idea now what it was he wanted to do. He could not monitor if they were pleased to see him by their style and approach. But now it was permanent. He liked this drive. Tuesday’s were tiring. it took him into the country and the open road. It doesn’t sound much. but he was not prepared to step out or ask a favour or two.
but it always offered conflict in his mind. If she changed her mind one day. so fickle was his concentration and it was all far too difficult for a person like him. as he was still. They were too selfish and conceited to know how the world is all one. He did not feel much better this day either. the student who was Dominic’s age said she was still suffering today and it was Tuesday! What a shame. he would surely fade away. he could not fight anymore or knock on someone’s door. It was so nice. seriously considered his own departure. It was time to stop most things. We all want to belong sometimes to a cult or a clan.Chapter 13 . He was beginning to consider that it might only be him that suffered the tragedy that no one came running to. but wondered if his body would give up this challenge. He held onto Claudia. He would not be allowed to return. he felt. It had always been a lonely life and at this time. He couldn’t keep his job. He was living in a virtual world still. There had been some people with whom he connected with at various times. He had thrown off these diversions that kept him amused. His exile from himself continued. He had no wish to die. He had done little so far except procrastinate about his life and his misfortune and even he became bored listening to it. He felt this deeper and more profoundly than ever before. He could not say it would bother him much. he was naturally and really ‘tout seul’ as the French deliberate. this naturally brought him back to ponder on the nature of his new relationship with Claudia. They were too fine and busy with their stupid and meaningless lives to be with someone like him. it was clear to him. A glass of Cote du Rhone could have aided him to dance this particular night away. his only friend as his remaining connection to this world. that he was so ill and was unable to go out. Dominic met many of his personal goals but he had not had the love of others. but he rejected his own and never found an alternative. Many were threatening to leave him. His communication was always and restricted to online and never face-to-face. he knew he had thought this a thousand times. at least mentally. Dominic thought. He had stopped these 102 . a self imposed one. He was not suggesting he made this happen himself although there was a time where it seemed a good option when he faced homelessness and loneliness. his entertainment for the evenings had now passed. dispose of the excess and wait for the coming of some change. He had recently.Hlupak were joined by more and partied all night! Mind you. was it one to survive or was it anything to do with love? It was strange that he had total freedom and yet he was a prisoner in this apartment. as it was getting popular lately. It was too late for this now. not like them. Perhaps it was him who would not be granted an exit visa from Hades’ world. He could not be like this as he would lose the will to participate and it would not be long until he ended up on the streets where he would perish one cold night. Who should he contact about all these possibilities? The question begged an answer.
It went on and on. He had no money to change things. A message that was clear in its intent. nothing current to contemplate and nothing meaningful to suggest more. as he would not tolerate a rewritten version of the past. to make and build a new life. as yet. He was in a dire mess. He had little desire to make things work for him. not declared official and frowned upon by those who took a different step and saw an alternative light. He wrote as if it was a ballad or a minstrel’s song. He wanted something fresh and something new.A Bohemian Fool nonsensical discussions with equally lonely people looking for salvation and a ticket to a better life for they would learn he was not so foolish. There seemed no reason to do so. His Uncle suggested that Dominic would prefer to sort his own life out and not get help from him. He had received exactly this. He didn’t manage things well and even if this was true he couldn’t be trusted anyway. It was hard to make sense of time and its mysterious deceptive nature. He had no need to want this. What was the point? Dominic couldn’t see one. He looked only at himself in a glass tube being propelled into an abyss at great speed. He could expect nothing or any support. it had its problems but it was a life until it was taken one night. They sold many things and offered them as he flew past. They were too busy surviving and he had neglected any interest in them too. The connections were all broken and Dominic no longer wanted to peruse them or make good the break. he never wanted to stop for too long. Dominic’s life was like this. He had no need any longer to deal with this. He saw many familiar faces with their smiles and comforting words. when he collected his thoughts. He offered only tales of woe. it had to be his fault. that he was the only one who cared about them. Dominic was left with nothing as he had put all his hopes in one place. There was no time for reason and time to sing a song. He always wanted to be somewhere else. Czech was instigated to find a way forward. But starting at zero made it hard to find the motivation. He did nothing to inspire this. Dominic wanted to slow everything down. not based on things he had known before. was for what reason? He asked and continued. He needed to turn his head and feel the space he witnessed here. It had to be totally new and it had to be clear and real. yet to be canonised are only stories unconfirmed. of hope and battles that never were quite completed. But he had no time to stop or listen to their deeds and promises he could secure. He wanted to slow this down. Images were flashing before him as he travelled so fast past their stall. Legends. He waved briefly and didn’t have time to say goodbye. So there remained only spaces filled with memories. that he had a life. What were we doing. this trip never ended. So what was the reason 103 . There were no outcomes and there were no rewards as it’s too big a romance to understand it fully. he was left with only space and thoughts. He learnt very quickly that no one was interested. he didn’t think this would ever change. trudging about in this life with silly ideals and false hopes? Dominic felt that no one really cared for him. He thought sometimes. only not agree. Nothing less would suffice.
What changed. worshipping the life giver. It came from 3380BC. Why did these ancient mysteries become hidden in a veil of mythology? Who gained from this power driven and god-fearing world? We had all been strung out to dry whilst we investigated the facts. an Egyptian and from the Gothic mould. one world and one reality. Maybe no one killed anyone. yes it has been utilised to confuse us and keep us from the truth. not Sunday or Friday. It doesn’t matter what you believe. This reason to survive as an alternative was too painful. as not one of them matter. but the facts were not there for us. They were passed down through certain blood ties and they were known.Hlupak for a new one? He had yet to find one. his day comes before this. but only Thursday. our civilised world. A conclusion we could not reach. But the fact is that we did evolve. maybe there were no demonic dragons or serpents assisting ignorance and negative things. Our day of rest is Thor’s day. It’s one story from one world. We are only five and a half thousand years old in this. we had yet to discover. Dominic did not either. The Adam and Eve story is the same. how did we make the leap to a structured society. trying to understand and disseminate all this information and disinformation and we attempted to decide which was credible. We are Sumerian. of the slaying of the serpent and worshipping him. but now they were weak and divided in many ways. the amateur experts on theology. Now if we understood that the creation story is in fact the story of when we became civilised. the choices were limited. He had learnt of history and how all stories was one story translated or hidden in mythology. Where our hero King Arthur is Thor. It mattered little if you knew that in a region. This is our version. but his spiritual mind told him there was some purity in there somewhere. Dominic and his children were put into a quandary without reason. the blood sacrificing and ancient men. This tale is set in what is now the Middle East. They are the essence of how this world evolved and depict only this. historians and gurus had been listening for many years. together they were strong. but we somehow became disconnected from our world. which was the Middle East. His logical mind told him these stories were all nonsense. the Greeks and to the Romans. Dominic 104 . None of them are provable. as somehow we didn’t need one. the civilised creator of this world who worshipped the sun and the cross of St George. from the Sumerians to the Egyptians. which is one cross. and it was adopted by the Christians as their own. Zeus and also Adam. But we.Chapter 13 . He was probing into his conscious mind and researched information among the mass of confusion that existed for us to divulge. choose a hero. We did not know it. Dominic wanted to join up these mysteries into one theme. Our adversary is Woden. we started living differently. we now knew and logically made the connections between all the other stories and the slaying of the dragons of this world.
that he was of no use to others. It seemed to be true in his mind too. He has a new dawn to follow and his wisdom is clearer each day. His past was long and he had suffered greatly at the hands of other less enlightened souls. The bells rang as he walked and others cried that he really was a fool.A Bohemian Fool didn’t want to be a detective of symbols and rituals from the past. He has gone from misery and sacrifice to being adventurous and enthusiastic. He had lived on the edge of influence and had learnt many things there were to know. and he has the will to start again. His fears have been cast into the distance and now he can let go and let life evolve naturally. As the potential creator. He carries a backpack with essentials and a companion by his side. not this time. which took us into another realm. but only just. There was always something others could not define and through the misconceptions and myriad of false accusations he could stand clear ready to create again. He is about to commit and his potential will be lost. There were conspiracies and there were men who manipulated this world. The unlimited potential of his human spirit charges his open mind and he contemplates a journey he will soon take. they were part of some Masonic cult. He was laughed at and revered by those who became his adversaries but throughout this he kept his dignity. He is on the brink of a new age and love waits for him. He is about to unfold the plan contained in his bag for the world and its fool. Yes. We were imprisoned and tortured here in many demonic ways. His silent call can be heard as a hesitation before he says what he needs to. He has finished telling the truth and ceased acting for his supper. the final chapter as he buries his failings and looks only ahead. He has hidden the clothes of the jester he once wore and has taken to wearing a cloak. they existed and yes. The fool on the hill sees everything that is before him. the ice water and the cliff he waits on. he adores the energy and refutes the past. He kept illustrating his ideas and 105 . He has the 12 reasons to guide him through the zodiacal calendar and understands the planets and their love for him. He was reminded at every moment of his days dressed in red and yellow with a hat to match. the radiant sun. He has the four elements tamed and surrounds himself with them. He is covered with the world and celebrates its virtuosity. He has lost everything and is starting from zero but he has gained everything in return. he has the power to create. but through this time had maintained his fundamental policy of preaching the truth through many different methods. He is young again and despite adversity and a crumbling mountain he has come back to the top. The infinite wisdom of knowing will be transformed into the action of doing. the clear mountain air. This is the moment of his purest form. He knows what he will be and this is what he will be. Dominic did not have the time to waste to prove that fact and theory were in fact one and there was something else we needed to know? There was always something else. There were many avenues we could become neatly confused in and Dominic thought that he would not chose this. let alone himself.
There was a need to be something. This was not his type of comfort being taken up and down again. nod his head as if he agreed with some nonsensical. who changed your superficial curtains that protected you from the light know they could be taken and burnt in front of your eyes. He would take no more.Chapter 13 .Hlupak punctuating the notion that here there was in fact more than we could see. had he been the jester and then the fool. He would tell no more stories that needed to be told. and no more would he struggle to relate to those who made up the audience. But your demise was not any concern to you and he was only stating his vision as he saw it that day. as they maintained what pleased them. so unable was he to come of age. But these political formations became extinct and he stood aloof ready to take the next step again. He knew not one reason why he needed to hear this again. act the way he did. but beautiful place and he had not found his place in it. it made him dizzy and made him attached to things he was being driven through. He had trudged the road of uncertainty and taken the looks of those who thought he was in some way strange. The harsh justice handed down would be superseded and overrun by the warriors who had no name. Their stories would be limited and they would live in their time. to dampen down suspicion among Edenite men. So those of you. No longer would he patronise the royal bloodlines he was once connected to. It mattered little to him. jargon. He had been led a merry dance in these dark days. What kind of fool was he to have loved this life and to have sought some understanding? He had scorned the homespun philosophy we all admired and its basis of complicity. For others would have lost their lives should they say the things he said. Yes the world was a confusing. This had gone now. Shades will be needed for your eyes and plugs for your ears when your controllers tell you to run. 106 . So was Dominic the fool with his foolish ways and his foolish concept of life. From the Lama monks to Europe. They enforced their ancient laws of man against man and performed the duties they did not understand. he chose to merge their red hats and yellow hats into one. but not from the courtesans and their friends. from deep inside himself. He was a liberated fool who knew no harm or ignorance that stood on the brink of something. their spirituality galvanised and extracted from their mountain hideaway. no mention of the King or his cohorts. as he had no need for sadness or happiness in this vein. No. not in any way poetic. he would breathe simplicity and he would calmly tell you how he felt.
Her unfounded self-belief had not left her in a condition to take what was always about to come to her. not a fresh start or an escape. in the window box. a dark glow became the shape positioned behind a thin nylon veil as she moved it over and over. She was once a woman. despite his unwillingness to co-operate with his fate. Her strength of control was fading as she slipped into a pain filled dream. but it was far from this. She knew. Dominic spoke to her on the telephone a few days later and she sounded unable or unwilling to converse. but what for? To suffer was degradation in her mind. He was. They all sat thinking that she was dying and they were not. They had all been around at different times. The sun would have no-one left to cry to when things turned dark and sour. They all watched and did not want to know. some were bold and some were too young to know. He sat and began to wonder. They did not want to share her demise at any time on the path. During this time there were still people left to deal with. Her bitterness surfaced sometimes. how the clock went round so many times. One person had not even known he was there in the picture. They were having immortal thoughts. Dominic would not go along with his fate either. Was this cloud finally going to burst leaving him alone to dry without sun? So little time and so much to do and yet we spent all our time doing very little. a shadow. but could only wonder how quickly it all occurred. It seemed an undignified way to go. She could never believe that she had reached a place so close to the end. She lived on either the first or ground floor. Her time was done. waving goodbye. waiting for the clock to make its final move. There was a vulnerable little girl running into the wind. Death was just a start for those who were more than just that. not wanting to say. She saw only an end. protecting them all to the last. They remembered the gentle wave and stare coming out of the window box between the flowers and the rain and then we returned to our own hole in the sand. Was she suffering or surfing through her pain? Did she weave in and out of dark spaces to interact with those who were dependent on her survival? Her husband could only be set free. There were positives arising from the suffering of those who sat. She was shocked and stunned. a continuing instalment updated daily at first and later by the hour. 107 . Some people were more sensitive than others. Her retention was weak. It was too real by far. A hand appeared at the side of her face. When she hid behind the pane of glass she was humbled by us all.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 14 .Nedele Dominic’s mum stood at the window. Perhaps this path would lead her to a realisation.
her early morning sickness. He glanced at the covers to determine which ones might require reading now. It was not like rust in an automobile that eroded slowly. but a new environment with some different diversionary clues.Nedele A few days later Dominic was out collecting some mail. It was like all the notes she left on her table before the tablets took their place. ‘Do not forget to take warm clothing with you when you go.” She replied with a loving look. He opened it and read the hand-written note. he saw her so regularly? He hadn’t noticed it when he was standing outside the box minutes earlier.’ Dominic was not planning to go anywhere and that was all the note had said. He found a letter addressed with familiar handwriting. He realised that we all sat on death row. She kissed the baby on the forehead and smiled. walked. Why had she written a letter to him when. It was not signed either. We have our victories. she for once did not hide. He saw her squatting on a street corner with a baby in her arms. she assumed he would know who it was. Dominic smiled and said goodbye. He could do no good deeds in Karlovy Vary. He had heard of her recent change in health. most were printed. but we never win the war. She knew her physical body had an appointment with the scrap heap and there was nothing else that could be done to avoid losing tenure of it. learning how to grasp. some longer than others. Dominic put the music on she had brought for him the previous day and went through the envelopes. knowingly. opening each one to see its content. it was more like sabotage. His mailbox was full and he had a problem pulling all the letters out. She would remind herself about everything. yet because we did not think in those terms.” She said. life was a palatable exercise with all its ebb and flow. but claimed to liberate. Our dependence on others is all but lost when they fall 108 . “I am always here for you. He would not go too far. The baby was pulling on her lip. ravaging all that it found in its path. a takeover by a third party. her virtual null intake of food and her inability to walk further than from one room to another. He asked her how she had known what he was doing that day. whose baby did she seem to be the mother of and why was she sat on a street corner like she was homeless without any money. Some time had passed since he first learnt of her demise. There were attacks on all fronts. “I was expecting you. Disease is an internal war which finds us all on the losing side eventually. Not a ticket for a pair of the fastest running shoes. he saw an empty space. As he past the corner where she sat. A tender moment between the two lingered as Dominic approached. he was going away over the hill. he bought a ticket out of this cold and lonely place. but decided to return home. For Dominic though. but this one stood out. which served to destroy. wholly confused and bewildered.Chapter 14 . it was time. which had been waiting for him at his box. She had gone.
perhaps there was something valuable. with banners and flags lining the houses. They stood out against the backdrop of ruined shells as the sun appeared to light them once again. he was disappointed he couldn’t visit him.A Bohemian Fool victims to the purification of our mortal bodies. They were not. as if they were close to an airport runway. Terraced housing had been demolished into piles of dirt. There were tables in the street. which had served to propel us through these sixty odd years? We still felt vulnerable to mass change where our structured life might be washed away in a great flood. The doors that still separate inside and outside should not be visited. when he learnt he had flown to England. which looked like an official letter. He walked along the waterway. she had turned her head on request. she sat and waited for all this to be confirmed to her. wondering where Dominic had gone. It captured a street scene in monochrome. He could see a small bridge across a narrow stretch of water. What sadness 109 . He was sure the coincidence was too great. It could have been this very street. He stood upon a mountain of concrete and claimed his territory. He bent down to look closer. but his impression was they were celebrating something and all having a good time! One face stood out though. at least until he forgot. They were low for lampposts. Faces were not too clear. There were none. He scuffed his shoes some more. The unknown quantity that lies behind them can never be determined. they had survived in while their women served the children with hats on their heads. Those that are left behind fight on and we find new allegiances. There existed bright red lampposts positioned all the way down this street. Dominic’s trip to England for a weekend was littered with curiosities. She was a child. He placed the picture by the side of his bed and looked up. Dominic could not really believe until he saw it for himself. Dominic walked down what use to be a busy street. A party was in progress. with hats on their heads eating. He kicked some dirt on the ground as little boys do and uncovered some domestic refuse dumped. posing in their battle uniforms. Not such a rare sight on the streets. He looked around for potential invaders. but he lived in the north of England and Dominic’s mother in the south. The second glance made it all quite clear. What became of the essence of our spiritual life. it had a little pathway along each side of it that went under the bridge. However. shook and dusted down. Men stood. Her illness came on overnight and joined others waiting to check out of this life. Children were sitting round the tables. Perhaps the biblical stories are all states of mind that have been cast into tales. dust and a collection of ageing brick and masonry. The disservice that starts this process can only be defined as it takes us nowhere but home to our self. He knew that look. He saw a photograph underneath which he pulled out. probably jelly. Tony had called many times this weekend. her back to the camera. If anybody were to see him they would think he was a little hungry. He needed a miracle and then he would believe. He lifted some burnt paper.
With no memory left to store information. We were all about to pick up a stone and throw it as far as we could. Once. He called it the beginning of a new era or the start of something a little higher. It all seemed the same she said except that it was different. He knew that she had all but left us. and in fact he did not want to involve himself in any contentious issue. They must stay outside the game’s parameters with confines to their expression. And so he went on with his life. When he returned to England. Dominic arranged it so it would not happen again. close family members and friends were all dying. Things were happening. a few weeks later. weak or already sold person. It did not stop this person. turned and forgotten person deviates and fights against the incapable. She died one morning before Dominic had even had his breakfast. What future awaits their children while they are driven to a place of dark and then fearful light. an inner suburb of town? Here the twisted.Chapter 14 . Dominic telephoned again from his hotel room and she thought she had moved house. we were cast out from our homes. there is little left to do. she spoke to him in her normal way. It never rang so early normally and he was still in bed. She came to see him one night a few days later before the final goodbye. He had lived through all the stages. no traffic system without a car and no capacity to function. he had thought that he would trade 110 . all the pain and the highs and lows. He cried when the voice said she had gone. but Dominic couldn’t remember what she said. this person did not think for a minute that there was still a human being stuck inside that body who. We were assimilated into some new arrangements where there were no hiding places left. She spent little time out of her bed and she did not eat. that Dominic believed. he cried as he drove up to the airport and back to Czech. Her perception of time had diminished and she wandered over the same topics of conversation over and over again. She showed little resistance to her plight. she had clearly began to lose her mind. There was a black day followed by a stormy night. We are all about to be flushed out by our disabled and disillusioned elders. despite her obvious sickness was still alive. What they were. It happened in a dream. What could he say to her husband? He sounded bitter and devastated. of a reduction of two thirds of the world’s population we would all be joining her soon. a shell like container unloaded at port. Now he was empty. Dominic was not about to argue with. Soon he too would be shipped out to another continent.Nedele awaits the caller? What depths of despair can be reached? Where have the partitions been divided? What is left to see and what is there to hide from? The disenfranchised cannot look from within a glass window. He knew some twenty minutes afterwards when his telephone rang. He would not allow anyone else to do so either. We were all dying and with the onset. someone came and began to give orders. yet she held firm to her beliefs.
he felt. It was not something to worry about.A Bohemian Fool tired old Europe soon and return to Claudia. It was the knowledge of hopelessness and the expression that time will go on in our linear perception we were attached to. He didn’t understand why people had to go. it was all water flowing under what used to be a crossing. When we were young this was not the case. he was entering another phase of time. He lost his concept of the world too. arms folded surveying the world. he was once her child. He wanted to go further this time and not be held with a gun pointed at his head. He was once her son. Dominic had considered his own death in past times. He had hypothesised and he had analysed every word that was said. but during this destructive two years he had forgotten it all. It seemed that everyone went one way or another. For Dominic. once. His safety net has been taken down and now he had to face ignorance alone. Perhaps this was why Laura had to leave him. they all had their chance to say. as her time was running out. Dominic stood. In principle. Dominic was seen as radical. It surprised us all. the cloud that surrounded him was already weighing him down. this reflected his unwillingness to get involved in manufactured scenarios full of superstition. the rewards had little consequence and the status less so. But none of them wanted to know him. He laughed at pettiness and security sought in things that had no worth. Dominic didn’t want to be judged. this insistence on having to leave. He was nearly free of all things now. If it wasn’t recognised. She went and then she went and then she went. but he would prove his worth to no man. None of it seemed real to him. There was a requirement to not say goodbye. She needed to satisfy some unresolved matter or factor he was never party to. it somehow all felt different. He missed his mum and he missed Laura and then he missed Claudia too. Again he felt he wanted to break out and dismantle the final bow. he didn’t feel it helped any given situation. He had run out 111 . Death was never a subject that was allowed to be discussed. He was. It was explainable but only to those who truly wanted to listen. In fact. There were not many of them. Dominic had shown such promise as a young man only to never bother. how quickly time appeared to pass by. he had walked the road to understanding how and why. Some people viewed him as irresponsible and incapable. it seemed. watching himself go by. as he truly was this day. he had achieved more than many men. it was frowned upon as if it was an admission or acknowledgment that we were not going to be here forever. but age changed this concept. He had burnt all his bridges on the advice and actions of Laura. He was once part of a family. He needed some help on every level. No one was interested. the futility he saw in most things fuelled this point of view. then it was never utilised.
or put to sleep never to upset anyone again. he wished he could be picked up on the street by a kind person and taken to a pound.Chapter 14 . if no one claimed him. from where. he might be offered to a new home. 112 .Nedele of places to run to.
he truly was. which could not be filled. He was never sure of their intent so wrapped up in the belief that he was a useless and an inadequate man. Under the guise of a respectable married man. half awake.Snih Just when Dominic had reached some understanding and found a few resolutions in his heart and mind he fell from grace unceremoniously. There were always curious looks and doubters among the audience who saw through this facade. He had the power of creation at his fingertips only to destroy this power and throw away these opportunities. He had failed in his mission and someone would want to know why. hourly emails and calls she would mostly never answer. There were a few people who really appreciated this song he sang. What caused this was another event allegedly out of his control.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 15 . the abuse was stepped up. it was not surprising how he fell systematically again. but he could not lose anything more. a large void entered his life. as time passed. half asleep. His mum was gone. How could they have liked him. The ‘Champagne Charlie’. He wondered when he would be arrested for threats and other treasonable offences. In fact. how could they have wanted to spend time with him? It seemed ludicrous in the extreme. he pondered. but these were rare in this busy and industrial campus we lived on. but it seemed to most people that he was more than worthy of the title of fool. He felt exposed and far from himself. He had reconciled his self-esteem and boosted his confidence only to suddenly lose it all in a moment. He sat in a chair waiting for a knock on the door. his ghosts crept up on him and reminded him how vulnerable he was and how isolated he was. He was not equipped well for this society. it was gone already. He was not exposed to the public in general and was protected from demonstrating this whimsical melody he played. He was the ‘stoned head’ he always wanted to be giggling through life. He had triple zeroed his hard drive as he had threatened Laura with unspeakable things by email. his nonsensical madness surfaced only briefly and only in the company of family members. for the second time in such a short time. music halls featured regularly to gain applause. Dominic claimed he shared this apartment building in his story he invented. He believed he was not worthy of the title of creator. He 113 . more so. he had proven this numerous times before and this was why most people had little time for him as he floundered through life painfully. he was not designed to take its ebb and flow. A man in a grey suit inspected the contents of his trashcan. he expected to be taken away to be interrogated. his new misery and sadness he blamed her for.
but they were unable to go to the next phase. It was clear and deliberately layered upon him a sense of foreboding. also brought with it a sanitising and fresh beginning. He wished that Laura were dead and not his mother. such large flakes pasting patterns over Dominic’s clothed body as if a quilt was cut open and the content sent down to cover him and on impact he became wet. He longed for her suffering and hoped he didn’t need to instigate it. He had these insecurities which tapped him on the shoulder as he shouted frantically in the hope of salvation. He had lost his position as host to frivolous moments. He brushed off the excess ice water and tried to see ahead as if he had been sent more news to impair his vision and purpose. The cheap coat he wore kept him alive. It was Dominic that had to shape this next period of time and not look to others to lead him as if he was unable to see. He was waiting for Hermes still or any alternative to guide him through this Nepalese terrain. His influenza.Snih had all his excuses ready. He did not seek attention. but it didn’t deny the fact that he now had no one to speak of. apart from his guardian angel. Laura suitably exploited these throughout the twenty-seven years. another avoidance to dig a clear path in the blizzard. who was marooned in Perth. which circulated his years. 114 . the roles seemed incompatible. He listened to some songs and they had predicted this awful time. His mind was awash with uncertainty. He didn’t see anyone who could double as a friend and a Sherpa.Chapter 15 . He may have considered too many things for a simple man and he had already travelled too much for one life. from any place in fact to the Island of the long white cloud where it was summer. But it had been proven that new life could be created in icy conditions providing the species didn’t contract pneumonia along the way. it filled up with a confused concoction of information. that had become bronchitis officially in this wintery opening flurry. He no longer stood on the cliff surveying his kingdom he was about to create. he perceived. It was not blindness but an unwillingness to look. It left open another way forward from this place. They stopped at the point where he started. he did not crave it’s obvious benefits. He had obtained the fears of his mother and the need to hide in a bunker when the bombs were falling. From seeing the sun shining above his head and surveying the vast land around him. He had endless situations where he went too far off shore and was frightened in case he could not return. Dominic hadn’t made it clear what exactly he had sought. And then the snow started to fall. he had slipped down and once again hid inside the top floor apartment unable to venture too far for fear of exposure to the elements. He needed to hide away somewhere where he would be safe. he was very adept at creating one for every occasion. the reason he went to Czech. He suddenly wanted to leave the small city and run away again. The pressure had become too much for him as he had involved himself in things that didn’t concern him. it’s freezing composition destroying any lingering doubts. Dominic had patterns.
He had done many things. these men. what was in his head. and now he could begin. Without this equipment he might not be allowed to commence another journey. It was not the answer to his dilemma. He had sought to understand religion and its hope and its insistence on faith.A Bohemian Fool Dominic spoke to many people but no one had anything to say. He seemed no closer to believing that life was not a hoax. He sat and wondered when it would be his turn. He had considered all things with all men. The injustice. He had brought up a family knowing it would not be the last. He was only fooling himself. He had seen the bus station to local destinations only. he had tasted the water. There was no point leaving if he was just intending to act in the same vein. what was in Claudia’s heart and what was in Laura’s mind? Did it matter that all these objects and shapes were from afar? How did they place such a hold on his present condition? His mum asked him to take care of his children. he could not have an affinity to their goal or a willingness to even try. What Tony had said. felt minerals slide down his throat. He had played with trivia and had fun not caring about a thing. and the bohemian in name only. yet he felt no further forward than last time he spoke or considered his position. He waited to hear from Laura in case it was a mistake. He had looked at what he knew and what he had 115 . the same knowing glances as if he had created the debacle. the mainstream output and its alternative prose. But did he want to do this? This he had to decide. So while they lay there waiting to disappear. For these things were precious and held value to his cause. He was braving the snow and climbing back to the top to begin again. but did little other than applaud. He listened very carefully this cold and bleak day. and who would listen then? The same people who never uttered a word of support this time. to take the chances and finally learn. he would not feel any different. But neither offered a solution. He had paid some interest in everything. He would not be able to find a new tune to sing or a new shirt to cover his back. only reasons as to why it was not so good. He was cheering them all on. the insanity. the fool with no intent. he longed to hear Claudia’s voice. He drifted through a multitude of moments constantly looking toward the sky. Dominic was contemplating his selfish actions. but she gave him comfort. to try to be acceptable to those he wanted to impress. This time he hadn’t forgotten the important things he needed to carry in his sack. If he had been condemned for a crime he hadn’t committed. only then could he fly. He waited for permission but did not know whom it was from. Dominic watched the watchers and the doers and they were all busy somehow. his backsliding was surely over. Dominic let them steer his course as a structure he could relate to or even hold onto sometimes. they all aspired to something in their time. as there was no one left to ask. Only then could he really leave this small city. and he longed to speak to her succinctly and sweetly.
His predictions were realised. His plan was altered when Claudia flashed the green light in his eyes. The knowledge of something more. Dominic made a loose plan to do nothing. He had travelled from winter to autumn and then to winter in this long and painful year. But it never was the solution. It seemed he had nothing left to do but carry on. But as the winter set in and the virus took a stronger hold of his energy levels and sent him back to his bed. Dominic needed to negotiate a peace treaty among the warring factions and sign a declaration of intent but he had no witnesses to verify that he would keep to his plan. He had fantasised about companionship and about love and his loneliness had taken him down the dark alleyways to find some relief. he felt happier and connected again despite the illness and loneliness. each day. he was besieged with more anxiety in the form of flakes from the sky. leading to another. He would first try to survive somehow without feeling empty and lost. He thought he had been heading forward only to be dragged back down at news from afar. So close and yet so far. he responded appropriately to ensure his survival. He was not a man of the people. Dominic gazed longingly from his window. He needed to first lose his bout of what had become pneumonia. would it take him back to a place he once called home? But this home was always in his heart.Chapter 15 . ice and snow formed a white sheet over the buildings. deep within his lungs. The tone of a Siren’s call put up his sails as he 116 .Snih heard and it just brought more confusion. he received news he could return from this picture postcard scene complete and intact and start a new life with relaxing days and love filled nights. he wondered if there was a meaning or a purpose to this eternal struggle inside and outside his head. sometimes he was not sure. He would stop looking for a while. The sky was grey and it seemed there was more to come this winters day. He sought strength to forge ahead and he knew that there was another stream of thought he seemed to have forgotten. He was a phone call away from obscurity and he was a moment away from knocking on Laura’s door for help. so sad he was and so sad he did not want to be. He felt compelled to sample its fluffy nature. he had no food again and no whisky to dull the pain and warm his voice. He could not tell you if this operation was a success. to file away documents from the past in a compartment and to lose the empty boxes inside his heart. His year of sorrow and his year of hope. he didn’t want to consider why any longer or how as it didn’t seem to matter. his thoughts and his ideas and feelings merged into a mass brawl inside his head. He was alive to her calling. that sat inside of him. How was it he felt this day. the energy of love that was his to share. He slept and dreamed a night with her where she teased his body into submission and he prayed for a repeat of this moment over and over again. Could he for once be honest? Where would this honesty take him. The next day. indeed he had to. only some people. He came to this small city to understand who he was.
as other choices were only lonely ones. It would not be for its entertainment or its exceptional friendly atmosphere.A Bohemian Fool headed for his tiny and perfect bay. yet he had said earlier he had needed to. The doctor was his father. He still felt he needed a plan to congregate his ideas and methods. but there was nothing that could be done today. although he was not convinced he wasn’t fooling himself. He was afraid his paranoia was quite complete. Dominic was not running away from the winter or this small city. He could add Claudia’s name and her love of him. He could get carried away and ride off into a long white cloud but he had to save this for another time. but it held some higher role not 117 . as it did not offer this. It’s owners had changed and it’s street names had been erased several times. It was not the Netherlands and it was not Denmark. Dominic’s historical friends left when they were cured and although he had not indulged in the bathing in hot spring water on a regular basis he had tasted some of the spirit they held. then he could take others along for the ride. he could remember it not for the reasons others had stated. one he saw as coming one day. He would risk the journey and the outcome as he suspected. he proposed. he could pencil in her home as his. here he was prescribed a serious dose of antibiotics that he needed. It was a culmination of much thinking and much internal debate. he could add a list of things they could do. How did he want it to be. that it didn’t belong to the people. First. but it was clear that this place took him away from the misery and it cleared his polluted mind as he filled it up with history and the history had a basis that had not been surpassed. those ice-hockey players. He came to take stock of a horrific time where everything vanished and everything became confused and it seemed to work for him. He also thought that he may thank this small city one day but sensed its time was limited. He now felt able once again to decide. He sent it to those who mattered and he told Claudia. his white sheet of paper fresh and begging to be drawn on with words and pictures and yet Dominic was not an artist of clarity. he wanted to inspire a serious vision again. he had to organise things. but for reasons that made it his place to feel warm about and his small city to praise. No one needed to go to Karlovy Vary except Dominic. Dominic could sanctify the Czech land as a place that took him home. His version of spirituality was limited to the intoxicating variety. survey and shape his world. To avoid insurance claims it was done in another person’s name. he was on the move if felt again mentally at least. Dominic wrote something to give perspective to his thoughts and ideals. it was still locked in between things that haunted it from the past when Soviet tanks came to town and stayed to remind it. he was empowered again and he could stand at the top of the hill. he went to the doctors. one of the great men from Zimni. It gave clarity and he hoped to share it with those whom he had perpetually confused. If he could move forward. he could only think about it.
He needed something from the shop. We longed for familiarity and its accepted norm. It was possible now that he could cancel the special order. as always. Their relationship could be whatever they wanted it to be and he could again formulate his opinions and feelings from solid ground and with someone to hold him. He hadn’t relaxed for two years and its effect on his physical condition was still becoming evident. He could dispose of his deepest nightmares and all the wicked things Laura said to him. What Dominic had received was obscurity. seriously ill. They were addicts to women and any withdrawal was hard. The virus was not yet tamed and it reduced his will to do things. they went through this phase and had a preliminary leaving party on a daily basis. He could put aside the things she did and he could look himself in the mirror and not loathe what he saw. Dominic’s condition worsened and he called his boss and asked her to come to his apartment. If he could do this and not just think he could do this. The pressure and stress had taunted him to the degree. He could stop being angry and cease seeking revenge. He was starting to think about being with Claudia. He had to decide if he could live with this damaged one. if he could heal its gaping wound and repair the arteries. he might not be able to travel in his sick condition. the walls were white and the staff non-English speaking. he could contact those vendors and tell them the news. the one frozen and boxed that was scheduled to arrive on the winter solstice.Snih known to those who stayed here and collected the crowns unbeknown to its visitors. he was checked into the hospital the same night. yet he didn’t want to venture too far. Dominic. It was more than they will ever know. which set them apart and gave them autonomy. It was a short time and it was a long time for a man to recover. of his new heart from Lima. The balance between what might have 118 . It was not his nature that led him there. he began to fear its power and where it might take him. So fragile was our hold on life. in fact many claimed men were more sensitive for if they loved. But he had been through many levels of thought and he had come to realise how we were all vulnerable to so many things. he must become ill. so simple our perception of its processes too. join them up to allow his blood to flow. but he had to put these fears aside as it was not his turn to suffer this degradation yet.Chapter 15 . The doctor analysed his condition. he could relax. This. they loved completely. It was a strange place. It was not true that men were tougher than women. that he thought. the nights came early here and Dominic was wondering if he should venture outside once more and take a breath of crisp cold air. only cruel actions that had taken him from his path and his reluctance to live. It was the time for others he knew. Dominic had witnessed time and time again. It was dark already. in Karlovy Vary could leave his sexual fantasies and he could dump his tears of shame. He could smile again and he might not need to lie again. Men didn’t have an alternative mechanism. Dominic understood none of what was being said.
A Bohemian Fool
happened and what did was often one sided and ill founded. He became delirious in the room he was placed, his medical insurance utilised this time. He lay and thought of the alternatives to him heading south into the summer of his life and Sydney. It’s heat and shady trees and nights of love were not likely to deter him from going, it was such a liveable city. But even he could see past this obvious advantage, he could see that this was not enough to take him through his life to the next phase where he could find some calm on the eastern shoreline. Whilst he lay in his hospital bed it gave him a light to focus on in the darkness, but he had to be sure he was not taking this option to avoid dealing with himself, otherwise he’d be back here again struggling, wrestling with his fears, illness and anxieties whilst mulling over the things Laura did and said in her reign of terror. He did not want to go through this again; too many times he had to. He had to be sure to make the final decision and also be sure it was good for Claudia and him. He didn’t want to play and toy with her emotions; he had said he was coming to be with her. He had to make the final ascent to the action. It didn’t really come hard to actually choose to leave. Dominic was discharged after a couple of days, feeling quite revived with a wonderful cocktail of drugs. The ones he had previously demonised, but they revitalised his soul and his physical frame. Life suddenly flowed quite easily and this was how Dominic knew. He just wanted to make sure, he wanted to check if it really was what he wanted and then didn’t need to agonise further. He had a little, he listened to the things he had perceived and equated them with his condition at the time. He had finally found perspective, he hoped. Laura told him, she too, was heading back home to Brisbane and he was pleased to hear this. Dominic hoped for reconciliation with her and her children. She had been very destructive to them too and although relations had improved considerably, there were doubts and mistrust from their side and in the long term the damage could not be repaired, Dominic knew this. After five years of stupidity there might be some chance of a change. In a family, the children were the ones who caused heartache for their parents, but this family turned out differently. Laura did this, became the teenager and turned Dominic into one too. He found himself back at the point he met her, on the road and without an anchor. It was a strange thing and it took him on a journey around the world in an attempt to reconcile his bottomless and unstable life. What Laura did no longer activated or triggered any more pain as he had found immunity to her poison. These were key factors in his recovery, without this, the rest remained an enigma. It rendered his thoughts irrelevant and his feelings redundant. He couldn’t step over this important point. So, weather permitting
Chapter 15 - Snih
he was able to truly move forward, cultivate and create a new world and this world was with Claudia. How lucky he felt, to create something with someone like her. He was blessed, his angel who guarded him, had taken him with her for the next part of his life in the hope she would give him strength, from her love, as she once gave him a reason to live when he was not willing or able to. Dominic was not bouncing from one woman to another, he did not feel this was ideal to trade in one, only to discover another, but this was not how it had been, he never looked or discovered only to find on the horizon someone who like him, saw another possibility. He couldn’t confuse the two; it had come to him as he came to himself. This feeling of simplicity and close proximity had revealed itself slowly and carefully so now he could believe it’s true identity and not mistake it for another cause. This time in Carlsbad in the snow and the hospital had taught him many things he needed to know.
A Bohemian Fool
Chapter 16 - Duchovni
Dominic had hallucinated whilst he lay in his hospital bed; the temperature of his body and the chemicals pumped into his arm sent him spinning into orbit. He remembered one night feeling like a satellite travelling at great speed through the universe of space and time. He felt such movement, something he had not felt before and not ever again, whilst he sped with haste he was in great control and could see his place in this cosmos. Dominic was a mere tiny particle, a spec in the awesome magnitude of all that surrounded him. How this feeling overpowered him and this euphoric moment lasted a thousand, one came after the other, each more profound than the last. He could see it all and yet he saw little to speak of. This inner knowledge had been unlocked and he could perceive clearly who he was and where he was and it all merged neatly as if it was always this way. There was no confusion and there was no place he needed to go or had been to. It was all here right at this moment and then the next. He was swimming with the salmon upstream. He connected to himself and in turn to the universe; he was a part of the whole. How warm he felt inside himself and how grand the world seemed that night. A colourful array of brilliance dotted with fluid pints of reference. He clung to no one and he floated unwittingly in a capsule and was protected from the streams of nonchalant puffs of negativity. He could not be brought down to another realm, to the kingdom of the animals that roamed the globe fixed to their image of themselves in their bodies. Smiling inanely at each other and calling something white or grey or blue. He could not feel their negative vibrations as he surfed out of reach from their outstretched arms. He pulled himself away from this lowly castle nestled in a valley. He rested only briefly on his journey. He met some others passing him by and they grinned from ear to ear and then he saw a rainbow spread across his sky. It did more than brighten up the background; it was the background and the foreground of his mind. He was the rainbow and felt its many merging colours. He dived into its complexity and touched the connected rays. How sweet it tasted and how he ate for hours from its source. He kissed the indigo and magenta tone and carried on his journey. He pictured holding a hand and he hadn’t done this before, the pulsating blood pushing through the veins he could feel and hear move. He forgot we were alive and we ticked like a clock. He remembered there were moments when the hands didn’t move and we were shocked. He knew of no reason why he couldn’t stay out and play, but his mummy said if he didn’t come back for dinner he might not be able to go out again. So he came back and tried to get
it was like a movie theatre with 6 films or more all showing at the same time. We couldn’t always choose which one to see as we had no time for looking or playing a game. you are in this production from start to finish and you will not know when it will end.Chapter 16 . It’s this spirit he felt inside him that wanders from shore to land hoping for some inclusion into his everyday thought and life. We somehow. when he has had all there is to have. He read all the books that spoke of sentiment. He looked up. if you can find one. You are a willing participant and only leave when it’s time to go home. this reason that he wanted more. There is no looking. only entrapping him in a time zone and ceasing any ebb and flow. this picture he had tried to hide. he ever knowingly avoided seeing in a book. to not just passively watch someone else transcend their consciousness. He sat in this place he dug inside his soul and tried to take himself up into another dimension. faith and hope. A place only few even know. only feeling. He saw visions for many months and many moons did he climb up to see. He never lost this vision and although it is hard to describe or hold onto its value as he will be there again floating in the indigo and magenta. we turned off this ability to tune into this reality. at and for. It was rooted into his memory for three score years and one and it had yet to be finalised or it must at least have seemed to have won this battle with himself for his path to true knowledge. as the multitude of objects scale down and fall beside you. nothing he ever read or saw. One that he had the privilege to come to know. He’s wandered aimlessly and so purposefully in the same second so how could this be so. more of what. Dominic could see it now. you are always allowed in. running at the same time. one that was not up or down. if ever there was. nothing. There are many doors to enter these particular set of rooms. He only subscribed to what he felt inside of him and this seemed more real than most of the other things he listened to or touched with a sword. it doesn’t fit into anything we know. He didn’t need this idol to follow as it led him nowhere that he needed to go. a misnomer. lost our connection we once had on our arrival. It was another frequency we are all able to dial into. when he stopped to take a look. He sat up and waited. a parallel plain that co-existed with the one we knew. It reminded him of what there is and what is possible. but he never knew what it was. 122 . he dutifully replied to himself. no reason to make this claim. There’s no entry fee and no interval to break your concentration. given the tools to unlock the file. But the hour or minutes you can watch do not predetermine this. no. He came down to an earthly altitude and he fitted eventually back in. You briefly feel their gentle fall and it seems it’s truly nothing at all.Duchovni along. He cited mantras repeatedly until he drifted off into a hole. curling his body to twist the direction from up to around and back. crossed his legs and held his fingers in a certain way. He was not a believer of words and interpreted rhyme.
It doesn’t frighten you to see a copy of your face and they’ll all be sitting beside you in a time-honoured race. She. our job has been completed. as if he had been appointed the cleric of the dance or had been bestowed the order of the city. It is time we silenced the nonsense and got on building the road. We think now. Dominic. such was their incredible intensity and ferocity. It’s a mirrored portrayal that recognises the exterior you. He tripped over and over through his sleep that he thought was a time for rest. so much it made his mind tired and weary. we once held onto deep in our heart. which had no purpose. It was far from this high position and didn’t fit in. if not in body at all times. we wanted to carry on holding it in case we looked exposed. He had wrestled with the idea of sidelining her plans. as the dreams flowed so clear and bright and true. punctuated them with horrors that were not from the stock film in his mind. tormented with his lonely moments asleep in his bed. How could he live with himself. the Isis of his soul. to lift the heavy load. You wave at someone. but he considered why he should not deliver a huge blow to her pride in response. For we know not the way to go forward but there is only one way to go. We see it’s time to take a fall.A Bohemian Fool No other people seem to follow your excursion as they are having their own on another level in this multiplex chase. so active was it. and it’s neither this or any other. It was not this night it seemed. We have carried so much emptiness. Dominic’s insight was sharp and in good form and he knew Laura was about to leave after two years of misery she had caused. we wonder if it’s too late to make it back to the liquid moments. He did not know this person or why it had to be carried out or why he had to watch. we have been busy making something of our day. for the terrible deeds that even the Gods were surprised at. once again it had been stopped and not for the first time. which turns out to be yourself. Dominic slept in her arms and continued to travel. He ended this awful thought and woke up and drank coffee and smoked incessantly. He didn’t like this feeling. only it is and that’s it. We are there. he was over this now and he had to get her out of his head. Going so high to be dragged down with unscrupulous thoughts of evil revenge broke his connection to the other side. This particular sleep was again. we have been not able to come and see you all at play. this small city. In our secret cavern we have hidden. The light was too much for his eyes even if they were closed and he awoke briefly massaging his sensitive and welcoming body. He went over and saw the body stripped of its covering as it lay motionless on the bed. as once again it happened. whereas previously it had been sentenced to be suspended. this way only offered balance. He returned to sleep after calling out her name. Dominic’s new appointment as spiritual guide did not alter his requirement to 123 . but he replied that he did not want to go back. knowing the deceit and the wicked things she said? Tony told Dominic.
as if he was the enemy who must never be told. He was a little better now and could work again. it was likely to come back his way. How should he respond to this illegal move when it was only him that couldn’t say a thing and had to shout the truth from the mountaintop to nobody? He needed to decide. as it drifted into delusion and back a whole year or more. It was not a direct cause. Laura said to her children and it seemed cruel and unkind to even say. Would he be happy knowing he’d succeeded in striking a mortal blow when he could be living again in the arms of love and making something for him to know? Dominic couldn’t answer this perplexing question. followed by effect. as he was not a merciless soldier in a war of hate.Duchovni drive to Nova Role again.Chapter 16 . something. as Freud did. everyone told him to accept this trick and leave it well alone. as there was not a soul who he could ask what to do. after his ailments had faded. forget her they said. It was Dominic that had been disposed of. when Dominic was not of this ilk. would it condemn the guilty woman. He could aspire to what he needed to be. It came from insanity Dominic said. to decide for others. multiplying. it came from childhood neurosis. He’ll be high up in the sky. It was unfair as he was burdened with this responsibility. He had been through this before a thousand times and once he even tried to be that powerful. but it was not something he was good at and it was not something he could do without severe provocation. these things had plagued him like locusts or rabbits. These things stopped him returning home. but no one had told his mind of this miracle cure being witnessed. but then there is no forever really. It’s traditional to counter incursions into owned territory or fight back whilst under attack. It was a curious decision as he was 124 . he must finally lay to rest. thinking of them. but how was his final decision to be made. but it took his energy away and in doing so took him away from Claudia and a future. for it needed to be done from a high line of thought. but could he then live with his actions for a few score years or more. Dominic had altered his path and made plans to finally leave as once Goethe did. It was only him that desired no power like this. They knew nothing of the wicked deeds or the pain handed down. move on they said. He had struggled to finally rid himself of this nightmare and the concept of one almighty blow to finish it forever. up the hill in the snow and ice of less than zero degrees. not retribution and he struggled knowing how happy a day it would be all together again minus him. which clearly he had. it was for the arrogant and uncaring he must go. Dominic wasn’t sure if he should write a story of prediction. only sentiment and who was he to play as one of the gods. Should he take the illegal money to stem the natural flow. However. They must not inform him of what it was they knew. like many wandering souls. He sought balance. Should he leave it all to fate and then wish he had acted in time for the rest of his life.
eventually smile. He thought it was time he finally moved on as advised by the uncaring folk. he sat without hope and not knowing who he was. In his newly discovered Czech manner he went for more money. He moved onto to another day and still it was cold and still he had little to say.A Bohemian Fool empowered once again. he decided it was to be. it was what he had wanted. He knew. He had frequented places more than once and still they tried to steal from him. He should not create more for them to choose between. it changed his complexion. The Romany. are blamed for such bad behaviour. it was abundantly clear to Dominic. Dominic loved life and he wanted to feel it and caress it and touch its energy. Dominic too had become like them. theirs were different. but his. then he came down and changed his mind again. He did not think the past was littered with such petty thieving and deceit. at the top of the snow filled mountain. so young and extremely carefree. It was not a choice from the heart. so therefore he should never take revenge. assimilate and take he did. It was not their problem. Someone might be there to see him. his crowns of servitude. He always gave opportunities first for others to do the right thing. but the path to here was one he surely had chosen. that he too. chance his luck in some new city and more. as it seemed to stimulate his need to survive. He hoped for small incidents that could seal an envelope tightly and then he could say goodbye. who looked quite different from Czech’s. really. but a practical one. Dominic had been warned 125 . it’s not how he was and it was not what he felt. Then when this didn’t transpire he took alternative action. He wanted to lose this superficial notion of belonging to someone and feeling quite alone. But the soviet period of having nothing had turned our friends into desperate market salesmen. No one cared much how he felt. this outcome. more Indian like. had been difficult and obscure in his method of living with her and therefore he had no right to complain. but then it would give him a chance to decide if he should hammer down the nail or let it rust in its box. Then he remembered how he used to be. but he knew it wouldn’t. The action he wanted to instigate to start off with. He should not lean this way. he received no interest and no calls he could answer. He knew the process was damaging and hurtful. he wanted to fly through its possibilities. He hoped it would work. He waited for another sunset to close off the day. He sat and watched the clock turn again. He went from one side to the other and rocked during the day. He had witnessed this callous and deliberate attempt to fleece tourists and foreigners. In a way it was a method of feeling good about himself and not feeling guilty or unable to cope with the things he activated. He needed to rise to this occasion and take his opportunities. looking for a reason to try to understand.
On the borders of the country are littered ‘nightclubs’. He was just tinkering with some scenery. Forget the beer and the historical castles. The indignity of being accosted by two women who grabbed his testicles and took his cash cannot be measured. perhaps where the sun sets on the mountains and the sea is ahead of him. it is a collection of brothels aimed at the men from Germany. There were many on every main road into this country. so he can see where the land of the long white cloud really is. sipping glasses of wine together. readjusting the surroundings so he could become him again and as Tony had quite rightly pointed out. not the nightclubs. it made me whole. as they are everywhere now. This is not the kind of place you dance the night away.Chapter 16 . perhaps not on country roads and highways. the heavy winter food. 126 . Dominic was tiring of his recovery home. in fact. after he visited somewhere. nothing off the menu. It was therefore not a surprise that the mentality of taking in one form or another was common practice. He wanted to be free of this incessant quest for cash. All in one moment they could conjure up a storm. that it was great to see him back. “You are all the things that represent life”. He knew he would be there. but it turned out different than he first thought to read. was not restricted. they could reel in the ridiculous memory of a few years alone. it made me righteous right through to my soul. as one of the leading foreign currency earners. This trade. He was lighter upon arriving home of a few hundred crowns.” Dominic sang the words he knew well. They offered the usual fare and they said. This payment for being felt was not negotiable and he didn’t feel a thing. in his mind and in his body. He was wishing he was far away again. walking together and sleeping together. it was the women housed in roadside buildings taking cash for copulation that kept the tourists coming back. He longed to be there now with Claudia. not much to lose. It gives the place a dirty feel. who stole from you whilst negotiating further theft. Laura gave Dominic something he thought he didn’t need. He had lost the same in restaurants and bars here in Carlsbad on different nights before he realised what had happened. but the desire to frisk everyone who blindly visits. the change in his pocket you are most welcome to have. Tony said. and prosper due to the inferior cost compared to their German counterparts. “It made me mellow. He waited for no one and he intended to be there as soon as he could. He concluded in another of the many conversations between him and Dominic. Sexual tourism is a popular sport and was one of the biggest attractions to the Czech Republic where it was noted that many women from the east move west to ply their ancient trade.Duchovni of the conduct of the Romany. to discover who he was. Dominic encountered this one night as he walked home drunk and incoherent.
There was no hope in this. Dominic didn’t know if they could do this. 127 . where they were so completely overawed. He could start the journey soon from the lust filled paper note he saved. every day in a hopeless romantic manner. He must run from their miserly love. But Dominic and Claudia had been through this already and they didn’t want it anymore. but he would always try. if there was no love that was unconditional to fire up its wood. that he went to the eastern shores of Sydney.A Bohemian Fool He hoped Claudia would see him as soon as he arrived looking awkwardly sheepish and too tired to bear some praise. as they claimed to keep him in hope. he knew she would be glad to see him. He had seen it. it was purely recreational and men like to spread their virility from their dull family life. the spirit of life unfold so beautifully in his eyes and out of his eyes. They wanted it to be a first love. The monogamous relationship works rarely in truth. so he could feel. he needed to hide it from those who preyed upon him and wished to take his story. again. He wanted to de-tune and realign himself in a way he needed to. as glad as he would be. He wanted it to happen again. It was the one that was coming to his wallet rather soon.
things were moving again. As Dominic had found it was always crumbling. but he had to wait. then it made less. We were always left with what we arrived with. whatever you did. He drew up a list in his mind. But. at least it seemed this way to him. Dominic no longer needed to compensate 128 . Dominic never went to see. so language wasn’t required. it mattered little. never had an opportunity to push him along a path. If his illusion was better than someone else’s. We spend so much of our life conforming to some regime or another and do not actually get to decide much. Instead. very little. as he was tired now. despite his well-meaning intentions.Chapter 17 . we could assess our life with achievements and goals reached or some business success. The careers advisor. deep and meaningful in his mind. was amusing but he was born at home. so much to share with Claudia. However the boredom and loneliness he complained about consistently did have its positive aspects. Dominic stepped over him. and considered the things he needed to do. Dominic spoke to him in English and he answered him in Czech. rich in content and sexual in nature. We could measure this in monetary terms and we could measure this in our selection of friends and lovers. where he laid his head in the warmth of his apartment on the top floor. Maybe he missed his last bus from Trznice close by. There were so many words Dominic still hadn’t said. but both men knew what was happening. Yes. but this only covers the cracks on the very unstable wall we sit behind. He had gone the following morning. as it was not a representation of anything other than your illusion. No longer was he answerable for a solitary thing. It was minus something outside and he was slightly warmer inside. if someone else’s was better than his. in fact.Zapsat Chapter 17 . This was a job title worthy of a nobleman such as he claimed. we make and take rational choices. deposed of his high caste status. said good night and continued up four flights of stairs. His amusing anecdote of being switched at birth. as he saw little meaning. Dominic aspired to being a monk of the modern dilemma and a depressed cleric of his sadness. bricks and mortar were really no more secure than a wooden hut in the middle of a cyclone. it made little difference. and eventually it turned into a collapse in one form or another.Zapsat Dominic started to think practically. it could turn into the collapse of an entire economy. It was fitting in this small city. As the Icelandic population had discovered. he became weary of speaking to those who understood less than a homeless Icelandic man and his family demonstrating at their loss of assets. When he returned home one night. there was a man sitting inside the corridor and out from the cold. It was refreshing in this fact only. Dominic’s illusions were well-constructed ones.
The horses seemed to care little as they paraded along the river panting and 129 . it had been enlightening. the ones she had so callously abandoned two years previously. She had married again very quickly the man half her age. So it was said. The other had regained a healthy status again and enabled him to walk up the stairs in the apartment building. She seemed unable to see this whilst she sipped just champagne in first class. which infected both lungs. Dominic could not hate Laura. but then so many things were said and as the disinformation flowed. It took him to Karlovy Vary. Somehow it mattered little what the truth is or was. So impractical and paralysed. His tablets would make him better as he had not been able to free himself from the flu. the small city where the winter seemed to last forever. The impact of the financial crisis was yet to be fully realised. not really. the one that sent Dominic spinning into obscurity and into Claudia’s arms. Dominic still felt lucky somehow. he became giving him another form of resilience. Dominic saw a doctor and gladly took the prescriptive medicine he gave him for a second time. He read that this was a preliminary tale. There were more important things than this and as much as we care to search for this truth. This was familiar too. which was only in one lung. despite his previous assumption of the great drug cartels being less than scrupulous. having lost the bronchitis. that fate had provided her with. Each time. particularly when he had to carry things up the stairs. Dominic found it interesting how the topic of this country and its demise failed to generate much interest. it sits inside of us and nowhere else. it seemed. He inspired the whole adventure. more was disposed of and he would indeed feel very north Atlantic in terms of his purified shipment. He had moved so many times in the past two years. She too was leaving her Arabian home and was heading back to her children.A Bohemian Fool as he had done for others and their equally dispirited companions. He decided that he had resigned himself to whatever came his way. He was set to leave and it felt good. He felt that he would not miss this incessant nuisance. she knew it and had probably exploited it. albeit differently. who was a third world man and was making the transition to first world and first class status. The horse and carts still rode up and down despite the chill factor. never frightening. He tried so hard. but his actions couldn’t match this. there were times he could deliver mean and nasty words. But he no longer suffered at her miserable and wicked hands. to Dominic. He had a few things to do and then he would start to throw away excess items he no longer required. Iceland and Dominic had some similarities. which would be repeated many times in many places. it was impossible to ascertain the truth. He didn’t have the nerve to conduct himself in this manner. not for any of them. firstly to have survived this and secondly to have recovered to the point where he could continue his life. as it couldn’t be any worse than it was. Recovery is never complete. he had little left in the way of possessions. and then pneumonia.
felt as if he had his things. It had not been pleasant. Dominic started a campaign of trying to get her to help him start again in monetary terms. his material possessions stolen by her. at least only in his mind. it all seemed rather harsh. it was merely practical. It seemed no one understood truly the multiple layered set of problems he had faced. as there is no precedent for such action. had become a reality. he cried. This was not something he could avoid and each day he was reminded how she had stolen his life. she argued and stated figures and reasons why she should or should not help.Zapsat making steam appear from their mouth. He could inform the authorities. ejecting her from his life. It is seen as theft in this oil rich ménage of capitalism and Islamic Sharia law. What was he to do? He was not attached to this process. He only sought balance. which were not his own. It was fitting therefore to ask for this to be replaced. Dominic was contented to know the outcome was clear and the thought. she denied everything. as it was illegal to owe money in the Emirates and gaol waited for those who could not pay their debts. he persuaded himself and he knew that once she had escaped the wrath of the Islamic court he would no longer be able to get any assistance. he too. She had shipped all their goods there and Dominic never saw them again. The money had flowed. but this was not an emotional quest. he held in his head so many times about losing this mad woman. he was continually told. forget her. but to these people it is theft. he could take no legal action across the world. she intended to steal the money that had been loaned to her. It frightened him to even consider doing this.Chapter 17 . he wrote to Laura and he spoke with her. and she would suffer at the hands of Arabian justice. but it carried a certain risk. all the same. He had hoped to lure her to Czech and he was going to place some marijuana in the videotapes for her to take back to the Islamic world and in turn she would face a lengthy gaol sentence. providing a first class lifestyle to the Algerian. but she seemed to feel as if he was extorting money or at least attempting to. He missed her though. life is never dull with a crazy person by your side. It was a question of honour that the gods demanded. Dominic plotted and schemed many times to balance this deed she shared with him. not a desire to destroy something he had lost. Homelessness and poverty were the mantras. To him. To Westerners. He was being practical. Many people left this place under these circumstances. He wanted to arrive on an equal footing. She was preparing to walk away from the debt she had accumulated. so he also practised principles. he had plans to enact. but its source was unknown. He had collected some significant email addresses in case he wanted to try to attempt a coup. Move on. He had once tried to enact revenge only for it to fail miserably. Perhaps it had crossed his mind. He had seen it reach out to the children she had 130 . but it was not possible to discuss seriously any of these real issues.
he 131 .A Bohemian Fool left two years previously. He knew that he had to travel there as soon as he could in case he missed the one chance he had to start again and not live this lonely life. he did not long or crave what he had lost anymore. What possessed her to do this. He waited for Laura’s call. He had seen something glowing so brightly he wanted to go near and see it’s white non-reflective sight. He had consoled himself with himself and he had cancelled his replacement heart from Lima. Each day this light featured more in his thought. the woman who was to deliver it placed a video call and displayed all the new things she had bought for the trip. it mattered little how or why anymore. It beamed at him so much more than the whiteness of the snow he crunched under his feet. but even this didn’t interest him. she said. an old design too. It didn’t matter anymore. She told him she was proud of her breasts. he was hopeful and at the same time resilient. He was unclear whether Laura had always been this crazy and he hadn’t seen this or she had become insane only recently when her age had seen her sight an end to her miserable life. Virtual sex was what she gave instead of a heart. Her garter belt and see through night dresses were unsurprisingly nice and her genuine dress made by Channel was a weird design with circles and lines in strange places. the horrific things she did. He did not walk backwards. he could discuss. He no longer required it’s fresh life. It was strange. He had to deal with this alone. This was not unreasonable. he was dismissed if he even tried. only drugs from a doctor to take away pain. it all seemed like madness to him now. alone. He had stopped seeking it from her. He had other priorities and these did not and would never include this person who set fire to the field and watched it burn whilst he ran and ran to escape it’s intensity. Dominic found that in times of trouble there is little advice or help available. He would never touch them. To Dominic. it was old it seemed. Instead he sought a different way and he no longer cried. There had not been closure to this process and he struggled with this. she tried on all these clothes and pulled stockings onto her legs and tried to show him what he was missing. as now. as she described them. in fact. He had had the phone put down on him more times than he could even count. It was magnetic and it sucked him deeper into its clear waters. There is no one to call on. He was not allowed to discuss the past and what happened and how he felt. He felt it was. without attachment. It was the strangest thing he had ever seen. she was disappointed that he would not be requiring this service. She then showed him her firm and soft breasts. She even controlled the wind and when she changed its direction it still followed him. But now the fire had been put out with the water of this small city. The provider of the replacement heart contacted him. she was like an upset little child. he sought compensation and he no longer asked for refuge. Dominic had no idea. He wished for simple things and an easier path. Dominic had a vision for himself and it was positive and true. she was not able to give this to him. a good way to get an ending.
power lies in the hands of the few. the air was cold when Dominic put his head out the window. Another victim of the recent economic downturn. It had snowed again overnight. She would convince her boss there was no problem and he was an embittered ex-husband. one in the red corner and one in the blue. If he sent the email nothing would happen. One.Chapter 17 . Until. This was a chance of a re-match. He would not be thanked and probably have the entire population of Algeria adding him to their death list second only to Salman Rushdie. the author who dared to criticise Islam in a book. this was a straight fight between two old adversaries. it was clear. It might stop her and address the balance of her insane behaviour. she was currently trying to sell her car and if she did she would help him get out of Czech. But he cared little for this. in the first round made his life uncomfortable and won on points. as it would soon not be this fragile. And up she would go. she dared to ask? Dominic was not sure. she would avoid scrutiny at the airport with her first class return ticket. so once again the rooftops glistened with white powder. Dominic spoke to Laura and she acted very normally. His once a week trip up the mountain had also been stopped as the company had gone bankrupt. However. Speculators can bring down countries and companies in a matter of minutes. She told him. and so he closed it again immediately. he sensed fear in her voice as she spoke softly for the first time in two years. Dominic’s new world order had started to materialise and no one could speculate on his stability. the third round was a technical knockout and he didn’t remember how he got to hospital.Zapsat had required. her creditors unknowing of her intent. But whenever he tried to be nasty it never worked. had the power to bring down a regime of hate and reinstall the government of love into his heart. She. Dominic might have her relations chasing him too. from Ireland and Germany. she wouldn’t even know had started. high into the sky. She had given him all her guilt and he had taken it. how fragile this system truly was. digested it and lived with it. This was not the only company who terminated contracts this week as the great domino effect continued throughout the world. the matter would be overlooked. he was a total failure at being cruel. he needed to offload it somehow. He too. he made a comeback and the second round was a draw. she received the first blow. This was too much for him to bear. She was categorically planning to slip out the following week unnoticed and unseen. he would be easily written off. 132 . How did he feel about this. she admitted she was travelling first class and drinking just champagne whilst he sat in poverty alone. he had prepared an email and it was ready to send to her creditors and employer informing them of her desire to run away.
she knew there was potential. but something stopped him. He dreamed of hiring others to instigate problems or cause a criminal act. he would not be thanked or liked by anyone. He had the ability to deliver his final response. At his worst moment he tried to cause problems and failed. She was astoundingly able to get away with this. revenge. It was tempting. they knew he was not a man of such actions. How could he do this to the mother of his children? Could he betray her as she had betrayed him and would it work or not? She would discover his attempt at scuttling her departure and ensure his own children never saw their mum again. in the name of the gods. Yet others can commit atrocities and not suffer dislike. by many despite her disgraceful behaviour. It seemed a little unfair. He knew that if he did this terrible thing. and she was smart. The more he thought the more he lent toward the side of the final act. arguing for and against this act of defiance. but how could it be so? She knew the damage he might do to her. But as he had said many times it wasn’t right that he should enact this revenge. He had always said to everyone he would ‘get her’ one day. she hired an expensive lawyer and divorced him without his participation. and still thought of highly. it was not like before when he sat outside a cafe and picked up their Internet connection and fired off those emails without remorse. could he live with this. but got it through the court regardless. yet Dominic in this act of true and pure revenge would not be. The more he sat alone the more he wanted it. but this was not for the right reasons. It did little for his confidence. Here he was about to believe her lies again. this revenge. It would be a selfish act. somehow this was and seemed more serious. something held him back this time. I’ll think about it. He was too soft they thought. but they all looked at him and laughed. could he walk with his head held high if she was held in detention in an Islamic country where she would truly suffer? He had sufficient anger. “I’ll send it. He had been subjugated to some horrific moments and they had never been addressed. But he had fantasised about this moment where he could finally take revenge. He thought about what it was for. The difference was vast. who cried when his mum put another man ahead of his needs and threw him onto the night streets of Dubai? Was it for his daughter who tried to help him and had become ill in the process with all the worry? Was it for the loss of his home and his life 133 . Was it for his son. he knew it was only for her and the debts she could no longer sustain. She had finally intended to come home.” Dominic thought.A Bohemian Fool Dominic had previously informed the university she worked for that she had taken bribes for examination answers and there was some good evidence that they ignored and allowed her to continue. Dominic went through this matter over and over in his mind. She said she would help him. Every sentence contained a lie yet somehow he thought this time was different.
it was not coming from a position of weakness. There seemed no doubt he should act against her. He knew it wouldn’t help this choice he needed to make. he had to decide for him and not for anyone else. He would lose both ways. It was a dark colour but light in texture and tasted wonderful. What would Claudia say if he did act? She would understand. It was a totally new scenario and came totally from a different angle. this was maybe one of his last opportunities and it was tempting.Chapter 17 . he could have her disrespect him one more time and laugh at him one more time or he could have the future wrath of others knocking at his door. But Claudia hadn’t appreciated it when he fought back before as he was still attached then. they probably wouldn’t talk to him ever again if he incarcerated their mother. This time. he had wanted her to fall as he did in the same manner in a moment. so there was no chance to react. it was pure strength. But he was not attached. The threatening correspondence would be cited as evidence. It was what he had waited for. It made it very hard for him.Zapsat when she shipped all the things overseas? Was it for the terrible things she did to him personally and the lies and deceit? Was it because she betrayed him for another man? There were many reasons. A bottle of French wine was duly opened and consumed slowly to savour the flavour. he feared whichever way he went he would regret. it was true. 134 . It was winter so he had chosen red. It was one of those decisions that offered no benefit to him. so weak had she made his position and so far from her in distance was he. The rationale was somehow subjected to a different set of rules. only. it was how she destroyed him so comprehensively. His children would not thank him. A catalogue of atrocities. but things had moved on somewhat. Her being in the Middle East made it impossible for him to deal with her and he was never allowed to confront things. But he needed no excuse to sample the delights of this grape crushed wine. Maybe he needed to decide for Laura? He had her life in his hands like putty he could shape. not the children and not for Claudia. Time was running out. too many to consider. What was he to do? He always seemed the loser whether he did or didn’t pull the trigger. but assume he was somehow still attached to this woman and it may even ruin his future with her. he had been a fool and not reacted well. He wanted to be clear in his own mind. If by some accident she fell into trouble there at the International Airport he would be blamed anyway. It was true.
but not wide. and the low cloud just wouldn’t shift from an ageing body. He sought refuge in astrology to widen his horizons and the planets that conspired to take him there. his stupid life. But it was not insurmountable this great distance between them. he talked of wanting to do it. the ones he had deliberated and agonised over. He had made a major decision and he was sticking to it. she had taken everything away only to give it back at this much later stage. But then she would have got angry with him and would no longer feed him cash to fund his miserable life. He was really missing a woman by his side. He was like a bird that flew with another and was never alone. the illness lingered like a mist that lay over the small city. There were always many from his side of the fence. A man looking for salvation and hope. It seemed crazy but then nothing was how it seemed in this mixed up dog’s breakfast he called his life. the barrier in between them was long. He had no one to share this dilemma. They bounced back to him in a manner befitting his state of mind. when the winter solstice came and the light of the day was at its lowest. He couldn’t see her suffer as he had done. He could not come from a position so low. He would leave Karlovy Vary soon. in some ways it enhanced their friendship and it made them appreciate their time together via computers and phones. Dominic’s emails never arrived. He longed to be with her and she longed to be with him. He was not destined for this solitary confinement as he had much to share and give another. He spoke with Claudia incessantly they chatted about issues that came to hand. Any insider information would not alter his path. He just couldn’t do it. so quickly. No one understood the complexity of his emotion or fear. but they had to wait for more time to elapse. if he told her.Blazinek Days passed and little changed. He was quite used to this and this period of time without one. more so than ever now. as the waves bounced through them.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 18 . to feel her close to him and all over him as she once had so 135 . but the many interpretations and meaningless drivel espoused only to confuse the caustic soul he had become. so needed her injection of liquid freedom. he ached inside for her touch. The world’s problems continued unabated and Laura planned her escape from the Arab world in time before the roof caved in on her. It seemed a fruitless escapade and only served to frustrate him more. took him further from himself somehow. Perhaps she would have understood. He wanted to. Their love was growing and it became more meaningful each day. hopelessly knocking on doors for that moment of bliss he had once seen. How poignant that. He wanted her so much sometimes. after he had suffered this great loss. some of hers and of course his. only serve to comprehend it. It covered many thousands of kilometres.
It was seen by Claudia. It was happening and he felt it stronger and more profoundly each time they spoke. but not until he returned. but not initially by Dominic.Blazinek emphatically done before. only hope. but the planets positioned themselves it seemed. After the solstice came Christmas born of pagan roots and adopted with religion in mind. She was standing there waiting for some wind to bring him home. it was truly better he went into another direction now. that she had nothing to fear in this way. His war with her was over now. of being together. Claudia asked Dominic how he felt about Laura returning home and what this meant for him. They could have finished their friendship at any time. This was never a good way to live and although it seemed as if he rationalised his fall this way. to make them find a way. as it was his destiny. it came. he didn’t need to run and hide in other pursuits and games to lure his mind as he did from Laura. He was not made of this substance. Tony had said it would be so. We celebrated this day with special pine trees and gave 136 . she said so. It was not a fantasy or a dream. The writing was always on the wall. but no. he saw it later when he emptied his mind of nonsense and saw the trees lined up again and then saw her. maybe you have to love someone to hate them? Dominic didn’t hate Laura. and he had laid down his arms in the name of love and a plenitude of hope. He was hoping for something better this time. although he felt that he should. It came at no price and it came without reason. There was no doubt in his mind. Something real meant. and loathing together forming hate. now he had cleared the way to return. he did not want this madness overtaking his life any longer. He called up the gods to fund this new adventure and a ticket out of his central European enclave. He waited for news of Laura leaving Dubai to close a period of time. she was drawn to him and him to her. forces not in anyone’s control had sanctioned it. he had surrendered to find some peace. He had left this paradise of warmth and tenderness to allow it to mature and grow deeper and he knew it would. This had long gone into the air when Laura took on another crusade. It had no future viability or potential growth. maybe Claudia did. which bound this fear. It was not easy for him to juggle and smile at the same time too. Dominic didn’t think they ever made this choice. but he also knew. He had reconciled the past and weighed up its misgivings and benefits like an annual return for a business.Chapter 18 . But the many crazy events that transpired tried hard to separate them. he knew Claudia somehow had doubts still about his commitment to her. He knew. It never happened to them. He had told many a tale he now wished to withdraw. He thought that he would come with no expectations and he would come with no haste. he had helped shape with the conditions that surrounded him. like a first love of old.
wrapped in red and green paper for her day. He liked this idea more. The celebration of the birth of the sun of God is a few days later than its original day as the sun starts its path from its furthest point in the ancient northern hemispheric atmosphere. it was a day where families got together. His son was brave too. It was the first under a new world order and Dominic and his son went to someone’s house where they were treated to kindness and lots of food. They didn’t suit him. It was this thought that he could give Claudia. For he knew he was a spirit of magnitude. Christmas in June is the suns day there. Of course. Somehow it was a difficult day and he tried his best to put a brave face on the proceedings but the alcohol dragged him down and made it impossible. He cried that night as Dominic did too. It had little intrinsic value to his soul. It is as meaningless as the moment that always passes away. Despite its questionable rationale and its modern adherence to consumerism and sales. Last year was a very sad day for Dominic’s family. whilst contemplating his position with those planets and with others in this ever flowing and changing world. Dominic didn’t really appreciate this day. The family owned many films of them enjoying this day time and time again. these patterns we perform over and over again. Dominic had packed and unpacked his things so many times the past year and he no longer enjoyed it. Dominic had learnt this recently. Karlsbad was no different. Cities put up lights and icons of association. Who is it that teaches us not to trust each other or do we learn this from our experience. She came from a different place and the rules were different but really the same. She had another day that had some meaning and structure to these things we measure precisely to keep us locked in this time. Now. A fabricated attempt at speciality was his opinion. its bridges were adorned with white lights. he no longer had to care about it. its shops decorated with glittering tinsel and the many depictions of the annual theme were spotted everywhere. But somehow it seemed meaningless now. despite knowing he was as small as he could be in the great mountains he climbed. Claudia did not adhere to this day of western men. not then and certainly not now. it is in reverse down in the southern realms the previous inhabitants had yet to discover. This in itself was a good thing regardless of the reason. He aimed for a freer existence. He once loved practising such movement as if to escape the cyclic methods of life we live. he fared less well on New Years Eve. but tradition dies hard in all of us. but not at the same time. Dominic didn’t think his son saw him break down until he mentioned it one day. He had no time for the humdrum of the workplace or the order of the day. Dominic had always trusted others to be true to themselves and to 137 . He thought of things in the way of which they came to him and he didn’t need to make them go away. they could mix both days together on another day and call it their own. It all means the same in many ways. we kissed and made friends again after the traumas of the year.A Bohemian Fool presents to each other.
He then faced a choice. However. Instead he faced a choice. albeit not for westerners.Blazinek others. Dominic had made a recovery of strength and dexterity no one could deny. There. He couldn’t blame others. the day when in a medieval city layered with modern attributes he would be at the airport with Laura in the hope of escaping. A high price to pay. He had struggled so much to be a nuisance to himself. He forged out into the night sky and made an unwelcome and unwanted journey north. Claudia. These winds might drift up the coast. punishments still included stoning to death and whipping. he found that this is seen as a sign of weakness in him. He knew he would have lost her anyway should he have stayed and got better slowly over time always thinking of Laura. It came as no surprise to him to find nothing at the other end. but rather than admitting she had made a wrong choice. but what Laura wanted was too much this time and he could no longer participate. except loneliness and more sorrow. and this eerie feeling of knowing that the ferocious wind will soon be back to destroy us all was unsettling. definitely. he sat in the calm before the storm. she instead forged ahead leaving the family behind and eventually crossed the border to the other side. Dominic understood Laura and him together meant trouble and he knew of the justice system in this land that was notorious by its harshness. and always feeling sorrow and anger. but this time he was somehow able to come to terms with it. which did him no good whatsoever and left him feeling nervous and unbalanced. 138 . So. but their gaols were not places for the feint hearted which Dominic knew he was. perhaps. He had been in previous precarious situations. He consoled himself with the idea that he could not hide how he felt and ultimately it was never his choice to go to this place. He resisted going and it cost him everything. would solve nothing. The Emirates were still somewhat primitive but Dominic knew she would survive anything that was thrown at her. he never revealed this. He admitted to himself that he was surprised when she betrayed him so systematically. Dominic didn’t understand quite how. It was this day that might have been foreseen. Running from himself. a highly unfair one with no negotiation. When Laura left the family and started to persuade Dominic to join her. he had sat in an eye of a storm before. but he could not. He was naive and he was unaware. there is always hope of this. this was not true. he could feel it. a cyclone once. but somehow this small city had pulled him. He couldn’t deal or face another trauma and not in this place. He had no reason to doubt Laura’s loyalty. He was not prepared for such dissuasion from himself. He sensed something would give and he knew that he might not like the outcome. they could hover off shore and come back in a week’s time. but the thing was. the whole situation had snowballed to the extent it became an avalanche and he took several hits as he fell. the risk was high as he was set to lose his new friend. There were many valid ones but none of them were his real reason. levered him from oblivion.Chapter 18 . he found every reason why he shouldn’t.
she would always call like this in the past. He spoke to himself about this matter endlessly without a resolution. aborted when she was young from another Arab man she had met in London. Laura’s voice was strange on the phone. It was not made clear if she had cleared immigration. The coincidences were uncanny and although Dominic could explain this to himself completely. he was sure men were capable of doing the same thing. half expecting him to say something. maybe it broke hers too. a lost child. A street kid from Algiers who won the lottery and became a citizen of the first world in one conversation he had with a vulnerable hormonal woman unsure of herself or her place. In the longer term he had chosen the correct way for himself. This was a country that locked up lovers for demonstrating their love in public. History seemed to repeat itself. He received a phone call telling him that Laura was about to leave. the attraction. In the shorter term he was lucky to survive. In fact it terrorised her. It was too much for this courageous girl leaving a country such as this. It mattered little to her as to the detail. He could not understand how easily she found it to walk away from the family without a care or a thought. they always kept constantly in touch. This stopped the day she met her new Algerian friend. Dominic abused Laura and then he abused her some more. This boy would have been a similar age now. half worried and in a state of pretence and nervousness. She forgot how he wasn’t able to do so in his heart. Her new man was barely one. This suffering was secured. she was his friend and then one day she was not. Once she had decided what she wanted the family had to make way. Nothing had any impact. but he didn’t feel the void in his body or the pain that had crippled him. It mattered little what Dominic did or what he said. he wanted this too as he never had the courage to go. However. the psychology and the execution. just always talking to him. always hiding her 139 . She would never say. She had lived in the shadows there in the gold palaces of Sheikhs. This part baffled him and led him to all kinds of negative notions about women. It was the probably the thing he missed the most about her. There were always many weird things she did at this time. This was impossible for him to accept. but she never said it did. sometimes she made him feel as if nothing had changed between them. He was not sure why she did this. Or so he thought. He didn’t mind Laura leaving him. he fitted the bill. had no particular talent in any direction and was basically uneducated in any sense. she had told him different times each time she spoke of her flight as she assumed he would intervene and stop her departure. He cursed her name and every derogatory word he could think of came to his lips. fear. many phone calls a day wherever they were. Her plan that set them apart and broke the hearts of three people. Dominic still didn’t believe it was what she wanted. it was a punishment aimed at him for not conforming to her plan. He was not like this.A Bohemian Fool He still felt vulnerable at times and others. whatever road he took to the Emirates or to solitude.
all on one Saturday morning. in this case. What changed was. This was not one of those moments he was involved in. a cluttered array of anger and misconception. when another kid told a lie. as she became this person.Blazinek thoughts and giving a public display. Dominic suspected she had in fact reeled the unsuspecting boy in and shaped the future she had now. did pray five times a day as his mother told him and fasted when he was told to. he made it clearly. when learning about her demise. he found himself on the other end of them. that he or she was a ‘lying Arab’. It was forced by circumstances and no more will to bridge the gap. not in culture or language.Chapter 18 . Dominic learnt the true nature of this saying. but had gone back on his word. 140 . that he grew tired of her bitchy and nasty games. the flat bed soothing her tipsy champagne head and fine dining which was rich in content. She was not a fundamentally bad person. There was a racist saying familiar to Dominic when he was a child. he just lived on a different plane and he floated hopelessly sometimes in world terms and beautifully in others. Laura arrived in Australia unfettered by her many hours in the air. but maybe he had always failed to see the true nature of her actions until one day. just idiotic and crazy and Laura didn’t really understand the implications of her actions. he missed out on this escapade and he was not sad at this. The lies continued unabated. his sky like nature he tended to like a rice field for sustenance. There was nothing new in this. it had always been the same. One encouraged the other as it does. it was not a natural process. Her new pet she cultivated and promoted. but in its depiction. she had taken their culture seriously and took it on board and practised their methods. One day it dies whatever there is between people. Then. He was not better than her. Dominic was sad and was not. uninterrupted by emotion. Dominic couldn’t help his nature. which was always a gorge. There was a furore of disgust at the news among others who. assumed she had been kidnapped or drugged by the dreaded Arabs. too much for him. It’s strange how this sweeping message came through to children so young without ever knowing its meaning. it was also true that she could not help hers either. She had little idea of the damage she created. However this was far from true. Culturally they would rather lie than face or deal with the truth. he didn’t think she was this bad before. He had made his choice. It was too much for one man to take. She got fed up with his indifference and his lack of interest in her. She hadn’t taken their religion. they would say to him or her. and so keen not to lose her was he. He paid a heavy price. It was a start of a new era for her where she was about to mix some of the old with some of the new. they had rolled for such a long time and there was no sign of them ceasing even to the children. Every sentence contained at least one false statement. She took her privileges as he once took his. Dominic sat in his apartment unflustered by the gale force winds around him.
a bizarre strain of love that Dominic couldn’t deny.A Bohemian Fool Dominic had protected everyone from Laura’s madness but he could not do this anymore. 141 . It was not how he wanted to do things and never did it ever feel right to be this direct or precise. He suffered as a result of doing things this way. despite living with a lunatic for years and years. It was love. It was his mistake not to take responsibility for himself in this life.
It wasn’t reluctance as much as it was the result of sheer exhaustion and his not being able to ever relax for nearly two years. He had been reading too many accounts of future times. but this too. they stood the chance of losing everything. but there were also decisions taken from necessity. Back In Iceland. it had also came as a bit of a rush. there were worms entwined in the wood. But he had things to organise and he was having trouble doing so. if he could let it happen. As the population had been invited to play and forced to participate. but at least the process was in reverse to save the tree. He could not ask Claudia to wait any longer for him. It seemed to become harder this waiting. He thought that perhaps he had got used to this constant drama and craved some more attention. Not that he received much last time to consider it a useful practice. a bit of this was unfounded. He wanted the knowledge he would be safe at home again as he had lost his security. the forgotten country. his sanity preserved and his equity balanced? He faced this vexing issue with increasing intensity. it was still very cold to step outside the building Dominic was camped in.Tuzex Chapter 19 . however. His bohemian adventure without the adventure was already nearly complete. On this day it mattered little where he sat. There was no evidence to suggest this was going to happen. In past days he would have explored the region and the country and sampled it’s interesting fare. but not on the same level. in the hours of boredom he glanced through the many interpretations. 142 . only to those who somehow stayed outside this game. It was a time for collecting assets and a redistribution of them. He needed to get out again as he had become entrenched in some top floor sanctuary. Yet. He went out only when he needed food or had to work. He sought this possibility and he sought comfort again. He had managed to stop the rot. whom did he sit with. just speculation. and damage. He thought it might come from home.Tuzex It was a bright day and the sun shone. This opportunity was not missed. had been halved as the economic downturn continued to bite. It looked bad as it had done before. which seemed cruel to individuals. Naturally. Had he resolved the fear and the loathing that plagued him so vehemently in these months in this small city? He awaited further calamities to befall upon his sensitive head. it would in the scheme of things generally. Could he stretch this out another few weeks. alone or with Claudia or Laura? This was the next question in his mind and the only relevant one at this time. which normally would have been unpopular. it was used to explain and make changes. He had thought it might come from the desert. was largely. This calm continued but was always about to break out.Chapter 19 . Another job he had. disaster was guaranteed in some way. They always won and gained from these hard periods.
they had deteriorated bit by bit. They did eventually. the illness testing his resolve. who is of this life. but he expected nothing less. In Karlovy Vary. There was no logic here to analyse. It sparked a revival in his life and allowed him to think clearly for the first time. What the turning point was hard to determine. so much so it was never known what to fear. He didn’t count on receiving the entire spectrum in five minutes. It was the opposite of what was deemed normal in that he chose to stop trying to hold onto what he had gained. This had become the norm. Things could not get worse than they were in this time. Dominic once had all the trappings of this life all neatly arranged in the past. Dominic was safe in the knowledge he would be fine again in every way. Such was his fate he accepted. But people were not aware of this yet. stay home! They didn’t miss an opportunity either. Dominic aimed to take this flight without any fear. It was the norm everywhere. class and politics and not economics or religion. This is a primary indicator. He walked home slowly. as they were not in control. time was a factor. Their replacements would offer nothing more. a sad indictment of our society. He felt deflated and somehow a failure in the sense 143 . They saw a local issue when in fact it was far from that. no one cared either. Dominic had booked a flight via Thailand and there had been some unrest there too. Somehow he was about to find some energy. the depression taking his desire. it was the same. and he knew it. He felt it deep inside that his time was not done. he would aspire once again to someone. He had spent so much time alone in this place he hadn’t noticed the outside world. No one inquired into his well being. he still lacked energy. what changed things from the epidemic of sadness to some semblance of normality remained as much as mystery as the whole trip to Czech. Dominic didn’t know why. He was worn out by its complexities and nonsense that he never was able to relate to.A Bohemian Fool demonstrations continued and demands for the government and banking management to be removed were made. It was he that retreated into his shell and hid for a while. but he had seen fit to dispense with them all for a better life. the only thing to fear was the constant over reaction to every situation. no one bothered him much. but he found this life was fraught with danger living with the demigods and their aspirations. but this continued on from before when he totally ignored everything and everyone. one that was reflected by how it dealt and cared for it’s sick and old. The Australian government issued a warning stating there were terrorist threats to this place. there were more things to explore and feel. Perhaps it was when he decided to leave Perth and then decided to return to Sydney. it was not about anything other than local rivalry. which reverberated for such a long time after. The main airport had been populated with protesters and they refused to leave until the government stepped down.
He knew he would get there and he fantasised about his arrival and what he would say to Claudia. when we are up against difficulties and there isn’t a worse time. This sadness was a reflection of the day’s events. Claudia said in a phone call that he was no Hermes. This was an accurate description of his position. There is no help available and few guides either. He would not respond any further to this early morning abuse. but Dominic replied that this was not likely. most nights it felt lonely and sad. It wasn’t too friendly out there in the bars and cafes.Tuzex that. Her ‘Houdini’ act went on regardless whether there was a theatre or an audience. Dominic didn’t know. It would be warm too. as he could not see this heart being anything other than a shadow of the previous model. He needed reminding sometimes that it was a good move to go back to Sydney to be with Claudia. Many women claim powers of deduction to men. Others convinced him she would fall. Dominic felt better at home. Sydney seemed an eternity away and the full distance on a minus 4 evening in Carlsbad in western bohemia. he reminded her this was an unlikely scenario. Laura would not suffer the indignation she probably deserved in Dubai. the skill is unlocking that door to the inner you. Dominic knew. He knew he could not do it. It seemed he had made the right decision. We only look for one. but he liked her intuitive insight.Chapter 19 . she said sometimes she sought a guide. he was disappointed. he was joining a woman who understood him and said things he could relate to. he didn’t have the ability to deliver what should have been forthcoming. it came in phone calls as early as five and six. He knew it was better this way. but it added fuel to her arrogant train that never came truly off the tracks. It was a weird society with standards that were flexible when required and decided by what seemed. How Claudia had worked this out. They rarely exist. He was older than those who joined him and although most of time it was bearable. but he could open doors and illuminate possibilities. For Dominic. when in fact they are not tuned in to any wavelength except their own. self appointed men. Dominic had received nothing in the mail. as if he had somehow obtained ownership in this short time. if you dare. Dominic had found someone who was tuned into something. not that they would have taken any notice anyway. as summer found this city in late December. They told him he could not cancel as he had done. He didn’t agree with all her philosophy. This was a rarity in itself. It’s scary in there. He was a foreigner and they spoke little or no English. as the search finds traps and dead ends. She was the answer he had previously not been able to see. he could not guide others. it all comes from within. It wasn’t allowed at short notice and then he was confronted with accusations and abuse. he had much to look forward to. Dominic had come to Karlsbad to 144 . It was depressing to be facing an immortal enemy. apart from one begging letter from the heart company in Peru. from the past and again this time. that once again Laura had got away with it.
even the things he held onto in his memory. they were all expected to follow. They were sensitive to any suggestion that their liberty be controlled. He was angry. in her eyes she had done no wrong. He had made an unconscious choice to join in the revolution and now after a brief sampling of its intensity. they suddenly wanted. the endless plane trips and the million phone calls? It mattered little now. The children of this marriage fared equally as poorly. Dominic knew. but having an emotional handicap made it impossible. Dominic too. Everything was fine with her.A Bohemian Fool share the Czech mentality of injustice. Its content made up of computer parts. by many foreigners. It had been this way so far. he was the enemy to be lied to and cheated as often as possible. In fact. this had been broken before here in Czech. There was nothing he could do to erase this portion of the drama. Starting with nothing in the second half of your life is difficult at the best of times. It was a long road. But her year zero had commenced and Dominic was not part of her new world order. felt this great wave of injustice and harm thrown at his soul. Much of the noise is engineered but here is much local pride and fervour. She had just moved on. he had four boxes and a guitar to ship back to Australia. Dominic had also received finally a suitcase of badly packed items that were sent from Dubai. a folder of music and a few books. In a destructive manner she had taken and destroyed everything. apart the music discs. hysterical and fraught with invasions and those here old enough to recall the communist days were very sensitive to giving up their basic freedoms. naturally. We can only move on together. It was in fact a travesty that he’d had his possessions stolen in this manner. but like the communist regime here in Czech where some of the party members were a little more equal than others. He was constantly laughed at too. no remorse and no guilt. It really was a total waste of everyone’s time and energy. Thrown in a suitcase they were mostly damaged and now of little use. There is regional parochialism and then nations to contend with. again so difficult when one is paralysed from the head down by the shock and the sanctimonious finality of everything. A partisan crowd cheers the men from Zimni on every week. he could return. but Laura didn’t care. He started to pack up his things. they had an incredible past which was in part. also there has been immense cost in financial terms too. and required optimum focus to do so. He would not be giving up his liberty. It was little to show for his entire life. It would not be easy to implement a centralised state not based on language and borders. It had taken Dominic over a year just to feel reasonable before undertaking the energy-sapping attempt to haul himself from the pits of poverty. some of those involved in this scenario could move on somewhat quicker than the others due to a slight indifference in their economic standing. But what is several thousand dollars lost and owed in this time. However. she had moved on now. Laura’s words were the famous ones cited by all women who didn’t get what. What does it do to those 145 . Dominic threw the rest away.
are sometimes forced to leave the country for better opportunities and there are a lot of racial differences and it is very marked in the districts where you live. ‘cattle like’. it is strange. but he gave her permission. it makes it hard. it terrorised him and left him reeling from the experience. Her love was silly and childlike and in later years didn’t satisfy Dominic in anyway. He wanted to see it with Claudia. we have given up any semblance of freedom. it seemed to him. She was as mad even then. This is one way this could be done. the places you go. the Koruna was not accepted. he found fixations and struggling. Dominic found most people dull and lifeless. not alone. namely American Dollars and German Deutsch Marks out of circulation in the country. until. he was told. which he did not want to emulate. as clear as the blue sky he wanted to see very soon. He thought he loved her and this empowered her.Chapter 19 . as we would need protecting. We could still exercise our freedom and decide to leave this much maligned state and republic. none of us could argue with. he was clear of any desire to be alone. we are already signing up to. Lima is a big city but you can only move around certain districts and you never go out to the others. If you have friends from upper and lower echelons. They naturally created much interest in a society lacking in consumer goods. The next stage trickles forward. They sold luxury western goods. identification processes to protect us from mythical terrorists. He was taken on a merry dance for many years. Poor people. The Tuzex stores were set up in Czech during the Russian occupation to bridge the gap between the capitalist and communist worlds. The privileged shopped here during oppressive times. For instance. He always struggled to relate but this made everything clear. others. It gave him an easy life in some way and an impossible one in another. Dominic had listened intensely but still refused the heart replacement. always worrying about trivial things. she would love him in return in strange ways. At this same time. she always remained aloof and distant. He used Laura as his connection to the world. in what is a divided society. Dominic had been christened here again. They drained foreign currency. but it didn’t stop Dominic following her call. At times he adored it. He supported her crusades that led them nowhere.Tuzex citizens. he seemed to be. Her obsessive nature spilled over into screams of anger as she over 146 . Dominic first met Laura en route to a job on a small island off the south coast of England. Her damaged mind meant she could not give herself to him. So alone. in many ways. but upper are often your life friends and the others are from work or some from school. which were not available in normal stores. Dominic received another call from the heart company and he discussed life in Lima. but their life together was far more interesting than most people’s and this helped keep it going. run for cover or perhaps conform to the order of the day? A major world event would give a decent enough reason. The lows were extremely desperate and the highs were dreamlike. Czech money. do they hide or move. as some are too dangerous.
A Bohemian Fool
reacted to every little event. But strangely, she didn’t react this way to more serious things. The couple got themselves into many problems, rows and sticky situations always eventuated, and she was sacked from work more times than anyone else Dominic had ever met. She served beer in her pyjamas and threw wine over a tour guide; she stole cash from a hotel, struck a train guard, all whilst she was young. She had no boundaries and no fear, nothing stopped her, her freewheeling adventure suited Dominic, until one day, he couldn’t take it anymore. She was a singer when he met her, he joined her on stage and they became a professional partnership as well as a personal one. Their escape from Austria by train into Switzerland became legendary in their minds, no one chased them, but it was symptomatic of her need to run away from her childhood care home, she was dumped into. She checked herself out of hospital after a few hours when their daughter was born, until she haemorrhaged so much, she returned. She had the ability to sell anything to anyone, convince anyone to buy or do anything she wanted. This took her into many areas she was ill equipped to deal with, she always found herself back outside again. Hence the sackings, in the lead up to the birth of their second child she unsuccessfully fought another sacking on the basis of her pregnancy. There was always a fight with someone going on. There was always a dispute, Dominic joined in the fun but it led nowhere that was positive, the children brought new battles to be won and they were supported beyond the required level. One of the last events was another sacking based on theft, the threat of police and the impact on Dominic was not a good one. Then the last was another sacking and another battle, which was lost. It was quite sad to watch as it became less fun over the years. The lawlessness of youth was a highlight, but not once there were children to look after. Laura never flinched at any situation; she came out of everything in one piece, as if she repeated her life over and over as people do. Then there was the money, which came in huge amounts and then there was life without any. The boom and bust lifestyle mostly came not from mismanagement, but from Laura constantly getting sacked and there being periods with no income. The movement from country to country came with never paying debts and deliberately obtaining loans to finance the movement, apart from one occasion when the move from Brisbane to London was instigated by Dominic, and they kept their house to return to. The debts, as in Dubai were always enormous and no one ever paid, there were one or two occasions when the collectors nearly reached her, but another move fixed that problem. Then once they sailed across to the Netherlands with $100,000 in cash in a shoebox hidden under the seat of their car, this was a substantial amount in 1987. To them at least, it was. This was the proceeds of the sale of their house. With so much pandemonium and so much more that Dominic could tell, it was no surprise that when she ran away for the umpteenth time it was another
Chapter 19 - Tuzex
fiasco, it was something that Dominic had never seen, being on side of the opposition. He had meandered through this madness and contributed a bit himself, but he was always pursuing other matters, from smoking marijuana, to chasing other women and at times something spiritual. It sounds ridiculous to state three things such as these together, but Dominic had no problem equating them together. It filled his time alongside sport and trying to keep the lid on the boiling kettle at home. To him it was not always bad, but there were times that overwhelmed him, it took him places he had no intention on going to, Australia being one of them, it was Laura’s idea and execution, sadly for them both, despite their material success in that country, it was all wasted and disposed of. Good intentions were always displaced with the goal to achieve something, and this usually ended up in a war against someone. It was why he couldn’t see it coming, the total destruction of their family, he was not sure. It didn’t serve its purpose for her any longer, the kids didn’t need her like they did, they despised her as teenagers as she embarrassed them and fought with them. She understood little; they were not interested in her melodramatic moments. The men from Zimni won a shoot out in overtime and the match was enjoyable against local rivals, Plzen. Dominic was very cold on the walk home, he remembered so many things about her, and he was starting to feel that this was not quite as bad a situation as he had imagined it was.
A Bohemian Fool
Chapter 20 - Neurozumny
Laura never lacked courage and there was not many in this world who possessed such nerves of steel, she had lost any fear as we all do when we are confronted with such terrorising moments and for her they came so young and at her at the most vulnerable time. It was this that shaped her life, it happens to many people but not always as extreme as this, any form of abuse is stored and pours out at any given moment. In fact, even on a lighter level, it can produce a pattern of behaviour that drives a person’s entire life. Being marginalised for instance in an ethnic way, can cause the oppressed to spend the rest of his or her life proving their worth. There is a trap set for us all, but this type of mental blockage stops any advancement in this life, no realisations. Laura was trapped in patterns of behaviour that even her own children were not exempt from. Dominic felt the power underneath his skin bubbling and surging as if electricity ran through his veins. It drove him forever forward, without fear or doubt, the flames extinguished. He suddenly felt free of all encumbrances and his actions bore no relevance to anything or anyone. He had given too much time to things that held him down, and now he could finally act in a manner, which he could define as his style. Laura however started again to demonstrate signs of her uncontrollable illness. Her actions had been so predictably described and their outcomes were truly embarrassing. She had always done this, embarrassed him with others, placed her curse upon friendships with people who realised she was crazy. Nothing stopped this great surge of madness. It fuelled always the next episode. Each one so carefully connected to the last, yet so disconnected in voice or reason. She had made great claims to having royal connections in the Emirates, she knew the Sheik, ruler of and his daughter. She was her teacher of English and remained good friends since, she even got her to abuse Dominic on the phone once in her cruel manner. Naturally, Dominic did not miss this opportunity, a once in a lifetime chance to abuse an illegitimate child of royalty, in response. The girl was naturally precocious and one whose life had yet to affect her mind. The princess was covered from head to toe in wealth. This put her above the masses and what young girl would not respond appropriately to this position. Laura even, reputedly, had the private mobile number of his Excellency. What other connection there was, was not clear. It was a mixture of fact and fantasy. Laura had embroiled herself in other notable misdemeanours; she would receive favours from the student’s fathers whose influence was great in this ancient of societies. She made a great effort to involve herself at this level of affairs through the children. She once claimed to Dominic and his son she was sleeping with a senior member of the government there, this was supposed to
He had to be kept close by. repeatedly with a cane. His mother watched as this punishment was administered on a regular basis for the most trivial of misdemeanours. Some people really do suffer. who had lost their mother to the intrigue and debauchery of the Middle East. But soon all these things were bound to catch up with her or not. She refused to acknowledge there was a problem so didn’t make any effort. He was not told all of them. adding colour to his defiance. But this addiction required constant cash to be thrown in his direction. He was one of them and in turn his life dissolved into a mass brawl of denial and confusion. It snowed again in Carlsbad. but more money would always be needed. She had left Dubai due to a robbery estimated to be $150. not paying your debts was serious and with her connections to the shakers and movers in this society. She feared the ring of the telephone. There had developed a need to support her new marriage partner whilst he dreamed of being a professional football player. the trees and ground and obscured signs Dominic couldn’t read before. Her collection of credit cards was stunning and her bank loans extravagant. In her fortunate life they would not. she splashed out her booty. Dominic waited always for the next episode. it covered everything. She had run away from the Emirates and feared its repercussions. It was photographed numerous times in light of the desire to share it with others less fortunate. But this act was not for the good for anyone 150 .000. If the past were anything to go by. It was the nature of things. in the soap opera it had become. not much really. it would not be long before the fear of kidnapping and forced extradition became a reality. Or there was an eerie silence. law. the pirate had collected in Dubai and wasted little time securing the trappings of her own royal life. Dominic in response had a haircut and pierced his left ear again.Chapter 20 .Neurozumny offset the truth. he told his life story of suffering. He was made to stand naked whilst his stepfather marked his young body. Laura bathed in stupidity and continued her process of destroying everything they ever built. Dominic had a long conversation with Tony. As Dominic prepared to leave and head south. Laura in her manic manner had picked a fight with a man on the street and embarrassed her daughter by hitting her bosses wife. Laura always blamed Dominic for everything. A trial awaited and prison surely would follow. In Emirati. answering meekly and pretending not to be her. She had many opportunities to redress the balance she so devastatingly tipped to one side. Laura’s arrogant and malicious nature always surfaced at times of stress and Dominic did his best to increase these levels to derail any future normality as a response. As a child he was beaten. It was a pretty sight and turned this small city into a palace of delight to the eye. so many came each day. The money flowed freely in this ‘petro-crazy’ country. but more than most people earn in a year. This practice was not frowned upon and quite normal. she would survive. Dominic had no sympathy but there was sadness for the children.
he was accused of touching one of these students inappropriately. it made him a target in the local community. A good start in life. The number was in the region of a quarter of a million dollars. He struggled to come to terms with this tragic loss as you would of course. He was such a lonely man. suspended and then investigated. The police on seizing his computer discovered an undisclosed number of pictures of naked boys and charged him.A Bohemian Fool other than the stepfather who had the power at this time. He couldn’t bring himself to love another one. He was placed on a register of sex offenders but managed to escape prison. yet tolerated Tony who was in pursuit of an obsessive love with young men. was his friend for 8 years. As there were no records to back up this story most people believed that it was a cover story for his blatant love of young men. Other men who had tried to lure Dominic into their arms were far more adept at doing so. even if there were no actual physical love there was a desire to do so and secondly he seemed to lack experience to bring it about. He had become ill during this time and was in the process of dying. a paedophile. But his friends were those who were ex-pupils of the school. The child was damaged beyond belief. His family no longer spoke to him and everyone he once 151 . now 21. in fact he had a picture of one of them on his mantelpiece. two of them and one was closer than the other. Dominic tried to convince Tony to clear his conscience and make peace with himself but this love of young men had been denied for too long now. After being classified as a sex offender and appearing on the front page of the local newspaper. His next-door neighbour wrote abuse on his wall with an arrow indicating there lived next door. It was a good deal and in conversations it transpired that Tony openly stated he loved him. Dominic pushed for more information but the door came down and he offered no more other than the usual denial. He loved her he said and there was never another woman. this was still wonderful. This young man. one in which her brother and father survived. There had been a string of boy lovers before they had met. He went into deep mourning for many years. But most people knew one thing and that was. For this he had to look after Tony visiting him and shopping for him. In return it was assumed Dominic was his lover. It was not a fortune. He was set to receive the proceeds of his sold house upon death. the story went. which he never was. all denied and all classified as friends only. a vulnerable man. there were no photographs and no record of a Swiss national who he met and lived with for some two years before she was tragically killed in a motor car accident from Zurich Airport. It sent him into a world of dreams and a hiding place in the woods. He had this wonderful story which no one would never know the truth of. a fickle nature making Dominic quite a challenge. The final job he undertook was as a mentor in a school to high school students. it can be assumed. he was not a gay man. They had worked together and it made for learning and experience. He would carry it to his grave. but to an out of work unqualified man.
It was still fresh in the communities mind. hurt in some way. he did not think any of the boys were under age. he had no right to. It was painful with cancer eating away and heart failure that followed. was run down with neglect. However it was then Dominic asked Tony and learnt about this case. Tony felt deeply sorry for the idiotic things Laura did to Dominic. but things may have changed. he was so alone and spent little time with others. He somehow persuaded his young man and possibly his girlfriend that they should follow his footsteps and go look for a land in the southern shores. 152 . it was only pictures. Dominic had visited before he went to Czech on his way. one of his friends had stolen from him and he no longer spoke to him and there was only one young man left. Many questions were asked and never were honest answers given in response. he was still a human being and it was not a serious offence. Dominic filled this void as often as he could whilst he was in Czech. One that was totally unrealistic with or without his money. but damaged. Dominic hinted for inclusion in his will as he was in dire need of support but nothing was forthcoming. Dominic didn’t find out that the case went to court only months before he went to see him. he was vague in his reply when Dominic received an email from a mysterious person advising him not to visit him as he had planned. no contact with under age boys. exposed in some way. It was an interesting closure to a terribly lonely and deceptive life. Tony and anyone else. he did not mind what he was and whether it was true or not. the young men were frightened of him sharing his fortune with him.Chapter 20 . A few pictures would not bother either of them much. his tales of sorrow and fear. he had got himself in a typical mess homosexual men do. Dominic didn’t judge Tony. Dominic never thought this was true. Laura. popular at this time. His house. He brushed over so many of the important points and focused on things that didn’t matter and at times Tony treated Dominic as if he was a former lover and he also teased his new young man with stories of old. But Tony forgot that Dominic had aged considerably since then and was not fooled by this trickery. He had spent all his life denying and pretending he was straight. Dominic told Tony. It was then he found Dominic again. But as he told Tony. He was being warned off the money rather than protecting his exposure to child molesters. He didn’t tell him at first what had happened. he decided. It did not do him much good.Neurozumny knew disappeared off his radar screen. This didn’t worry Dominic. he had compassion for everyone. Tony liked offering help to Dominic in the form of advice and it took his mind off of his own somewhat more serious problems. not when Dominic knew him. involving Dominic. He enjoyed playing two young men off each other. Tony made a great effort to be a host despite his pending death. Tony really suffered now in every way. Internet phone calls and messenger conversations. after many years on an Internet sharing site. as far as he knew. This was just a dream. he had done this when Dominic was young too.
as he needed so much more. But he had to be lacking something if he needed to fill his soul with lovers. No one person fulfils all our needs but one might be able to take care of many. What were they both fulfilling in their own souls? Dominic was not beaten by a wicked man as a child. grasping at passing things and Tony had done the same as Dominic. he was dependent on his young man and he liked it. Perhaps Laura was not enough for him. who was beaten regularly with a garden cane. Dominic had provided a diversion for him for a few months. It was known. like the Swiss girl. and he could do no more as he had to ensure his own survival. Dominic’s obsession happened to be female and this made no difference. Dominic had only his word and this had proven to be unreliable. It would never be clear what the nature of all these liaisons were. but now Dominic had washed away those flooded eyelids with ice and cocktails. Tony ignored Dominic’s call and dismissed any such notion. Dominic intended to visit again one day. nowhere. Tony’s young man. This was extremely frustrating for him. at his beckon call. But he was still standing there naked and exposed as the cane whipped his pale white skin repeatedly. But once again. He was alone himself and struggling so much. Dominic would give up on his quest for more disaster and his silly games. it was nowhere to be seen on the net. He too had chased many and found none. Maybe there have been others who could tell more and perhaps they were not all punishment routines. with whom Dominic had spoken to. one that was not guaranteed. She never did. despite being front-page news. He needed to do it for some peace in his own mind so there was less suffering. He had him where he wanted him. Dominic decided one day that he no longer wanted to deal with this. but never did. Dominic could never tell with Tony if he was playing another complicated game that only he could win. he no longer wanted to listen to his outpouring of grief which was not for the Swiss girl. it kept him going during this time. Dominic said to him that it would have been easier if he had chosen to befriend real homosexual men instead of heterosexual ones. his. it didn’t matter really. But 153 . Every stroke was another failed relationship. and be honest with himself. but he had little to tell. He didn’t need to believe in reincarnation or an afterlife or Hades and his underworld. many women came his way only for pleasure. not in the local newspaper not on local radio. He was vulnerable when Tony contacted him. His intervention was timely. that Tony’s young men created many problems for him. Dominic asked him to calm his mind. He didn’t reply and changed the subject immediately. The little boy he lost and was always trying to find. Dominic asked him to balance his mind with love and understanding before he died. confirmed it. It was no way to live a life.A Bohemian Fool Meantime. Dominic should have known as he was one. she gave many things Dominic did not need too. as if it never happened. Dominic searched endlessly for some information about his conviction. but the little boy he once was. it was the same principle.
and we all love to a minimum. Dominic wasn’t sure what it all meant. we all deny so much.Neurozumny when this young man decided otherwise or his girlfriend said no more. We are attacked on every front. 154 . Tony wriggled in agony and became sicker and sicker.Chapter 20 .
It seems with all this new freedom we could have changed our style but we are afflicted by our failure to be in control of ourselves. Tony was left forlorn in his emotional misery. We wonder how we mirror and repeat our behaviour time and time again as if we never learn anything. England was still there. He was heading away from his fraternal home. we quite often go and do the same things over and over to ensure we suffer in the same way as if we are comfortable with our nightmares. It struck a chord. in an empty apartment for her things and Dominic. He had found his Genevieve long ago and was meeting her again en route from the castle. In the 12th century he gathered his forces and made for Jerusalem. he shared his plight and his stories from the jester’s tale again and he wondered if he was truly ready to travel south again. men worthy of his cause to re-establish the order of all things according to the doctrine of the cross of the sun. The pain and sorrow of death and loss can be heard in the distance. Dominic had left two score years ago and longer in his mind. it had seen all the tales of woe and all the battles won and lost. The holidays would soon be over. All our experiences mean little and matter less. it was not case of simplicity or hatred. one that could not be easily overlooked. Claudia waited too. His visit to the castle was only a short one. He tasted its beer and hearty food and thought as always of many things and always it seemed now of Claudia. In fact. in all its glory and degradation. Vladimir had already kissed him on both cheeks and hugged him as he said good-bye. it was far more than this. He met a mad woman and he saw some parallels in manner and she controlled things to avoid any normal interaction. He drank and made a merry song. The world waited to continue the great recession it had started. those mythical characters of old.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 21 . and it was only the dark and ignorant meanderings of a damaged person who didn’t understand the impact she was having. It didn’t fail to impress and disappoint. collected his strength and prepared to face a long journey to the source of his own being. It came together in a special way. this he compounded as he waited and waited unable to facilitate anything much. Dominic too. He felt as one with them and their stories. He once left his family and his friends to seek a better life and it seemed good. He hopped from his Czech home to a pub wedged into a castle wall and onto Charing and another cross he had to bear. as he didn’t know if his was 155 . with Richard and Arthur’s permission. he escaped its restrictive hold it had on his soul only to discover it was the same everywhere else.Bohemia to Bondi Dominic left this small city early one morning by bus and plane and sought the refuge of a castle in middle England where Richard once waited and recruited men. The castle walls had seen this before. This was not a normal case of selfish infidelity.
there was fear that his hopes and desire would be 156 . no. her new world. He held his eyes wide open in case she changed her mind. There were still some outstanding issues that might never resolve themselves in this lifetime. as he liked to flow. this was his final trip alone. It was a tale for all and for hope. She showed him. as this loneliness would not pass so easily with others or not. she held him until he felt welcome and she kissed him until he realised he had arrived. He wanted you to come with him and journey with him in your mind. whilst he got cold in the winter. her holding his so he didn’t fall. It would not be put aside so easily. always wary of their motivation he would be. as he walked along the beach holding Claudia’s hand to guide her. He could feel it. We can all stop playing the games we are told to play and live in harmony with this universe we are attached to. we can merge into those northern stars and swing down to the southern cross. It was a legacy that had spoiled his mercurial nature. They could transcend the evil and reconnect their souls to each other. it tricked Laura and left Dominic alone to find another way. He could now hold his head up high. he had not succeeded either. He would no longer be a fool. Dominic wanted to no longer wander. Claudia greeted Dominic with open arms and loved him the minute he arrived. he wanted Claudia to come with him. not through drama or stupidity or through battles or sorrow. He was not a superficial man. in the depths of humanity there lays a trigger that can spank your very soul. He had not failed. it was an overcast morning with humidity in the air. We can start today.Chapter 21 – Bohemia to Bondi really true. We come from a lonely world where people judge and gesticulate on the basis of an imposed regime so powerful that we do not even realise we are in it. He felt it could. He felt fortunate to have another chance. from Bohemia to the land of the long white cloud. He thought perhaps that it might end one day. He was not a man of chance or gain. despite feeling some reluctance to join in his jet-lagged condition. we can put the jigsaw pieces together. Not many were interested in his tale that took him from the west to the east and back again. He was not Odysseus or any kind of Marco Polo. He once loved to travel but it became a necessary aspect of this time. He was betrayed one day in the desert by the sun. one on the brink of another failure. as she had moved from Perth and suggested it could be his too. They went for a walk along the cliff tops of Bondi and she seemed surprised that he had kept to his word and come home. He sang from the mountaintops and thought of many things. and we can put aside all the nonsense and the routines of hate. Submit to yourself and not to others. to bohemia and finally to his England. He would find it hard now to trust anyone in anyway. and there was not such a thing. they would be carried forward to another place and a different scenario. it was not his fate or his design. Open the curtains and let the light in and as our structure disintegrates and we descend into the usual round of war against the people and death on a global scale.
He sought some answers to the predicament he found himself in and he needed to find a way to be with her. It was Claudia that had been his guide for some time. In return he received a free ride he thought. he had searched for and yet she was there all the time waiting for him. It mattered little now as Dominic recalled the boring years when the sun was at its highest in the Southern Cross. but it felt the right thing to do. He held her hand tightly wherever they went and she guided him in this afterlife. He didn’t know why it was right. there is no such thing. there still were many things to talk about.A Bohemian Fool shattered so vulnerable he felt. He had his sadness lifted in Karlsbad. but this was not the truth. perhaps. We wanted some classical knowledge to soothe our weary souls and let the 157 . according to her. The magical waters and the mystical place had done something to him he couldn’t really describe. We were not sure as yet. He wanted to feel good again. Laura. and he risked losing Claudia. Bondi was a suburb for tourists. nor really enjoyed. It. Dominic tried to explain about an exile he required. But Dominic’s new structure was not war like and it was not going to be subjected to the usual slaying of men. Claudia had bought him his favourite coffee and made him a cup to drink. There were people everywhere and many voices spoke different words that he didn’t understand. He performed many days of intolerable worship to the deity of the actress. It turned his head and he was able to look in another direction. It opened up his mind again. but this was neither possible nor desirable. Dominic had travelled far and wanted to be with her. how this culture would develop or how it would shine. but faltered in his response. It would bring a new awareness and a new level of understanding Dominic hoped to see. it was her. She said that it was a risky thing to do. Words. It was a deal he neither agreed to. Dominic avoided the pagan festival of Yule this time round and hoped to do so again next year. that could be seen. there will be no victims this time or a massive price to pay. Dominic still couldn’t speak with Laura about anything. Dominic wanted to shout out loud what he had found. The Celtic culture that was promoted and shaped was only a beginning to spurn another evolved form. What was important in his mind was not relevant to her and what mattered with the children she glossed over. This naturally was a serious mistake. She told him that she didn’t understand why he had to leave her for the spa waters of central Europe. there was a conquest and despite its consistency and length of time it had to end when it was overrun in this case by Moors. She still had another obsession to nurture and her replacement son needed this care more than her family did. he wanted to tell everyone how it was in the real world. he risked losing his sanity. Laura had moved to the western isles away from the changes and the invasions by Franks. phrases he could do more with than just sing. was a tough call to make. and to live with himself. Energy poured from his soul and for the first time he had managed to translate this into words.
All those old sayings of clouds and silver linings. a new world order had taken over but as the new year approached no one was sure as to its impact and what it meant for us all. that is. you will find a way. We can now be who we truly are. He feared the day this might start again and he heard those words and the look that meant he might need to go. The most astounding thing is that however bad things got there was always hope and this was incredible. Dominic missed his past as Laura probably did too. no. He was not superstitious and he was not locked into a way of living. He didn’t want to. he knew that he was reluctant to stay. Instead she strung him up and left him there and refused to acknowledge that he would suffer. Dominic clung to Claudia’s care and their potential happiness he could see from the cliff top above the beach. After some alterations. and that love comes if you try not to look back. The signs for Dominic were far more optimistic and the possibilities were endless. Maybe you need to be lucky or blessed. There seemed to be a conclusion of many things. The magnitude of damage when only a word would do was a concept she couldn’t comply with. the thought far worse than reality. It was not his way to do things in any other way.Chapter 21 – Bohemia to Bondi young ones fly away. if you can wait. are true. He wanted to see how it would be when the long awaited recession came and we looked in empty shops for food or we sought fuel to drive and a boat to sail. He came to find some solitude among the multitudes. He had to detach himself from this web of ignorance and intrigue and eventually he climbed down to safety. When we sit and cannot see a way forward. If he needed loving. then he looked for it. there is. he was loyal to those who cared for him in a real sense. many times in fact. Perhaps it would not be as bad as some said it would. Had anyone learnt from his or her experiences? Had Dominic wandered sufficiently to now want to stay? Would he still need to hop and skip over to the Island with the long white cloud? Dominic wanted to know as always. we are riddled with superstition. but it was just this now. He was not loyal in a superficial sense. where happiness reigned and the collection of visitors walked endlessly. he was committed for the long haul. we can live and love and no one will stop this powerful force inside of us. and he had completed 27 years and never saw another way. It was time now for a little application of our love. maybe you can open yourself to those who know. Dominic didn’t want things to change. who we want to be. Its obvious misgivings and madness didn’t detract from the purpose of sticking with his family. But. When he thought of the past. we know one thing. We are not sure as to why. But the signs were not encouraging in many places and in many ways. He often found it. we can grow. It was time now for some reason. it would settle down and continue for some time. His reluctance to conform led him to spend his time with a woman who had no 158 . There were times in the past where it all got too much.
a fight and a war he didn’t want to wage. the roads were full. to make them suffer or maybe die. and then realised that his fitness was still very low and he went out to find food. from hands that were too slow to hold on. he wanted her to see how it felt and was. It took him back to Claudia and healed his wounds. He found a restaurant called ‘Hungry Czech’ where they served the food he never liked. He carried his belongings up one flight to his new sanctuary. It was symptomatic of this cove on the east coast of Australia. It gave a different dimension to the suburb camped on the beach. and go. He got confused sometimes but there was something inside him that said come. it was a place to avoid. one he awaited with anticipation. Dominic missed Karlovy Vary. He stopped being confused. Hats flew across the road from heads. The ferocity continued but the rain never came. at ten times the price. but the beer he did. if his guardian angel here on earth not taken his hand. Turning a friend into a third party to be laughed at and vilified is cruel and wicked. The tears of his sadness dried up there in that confused place. People came and went as they do. it was a storm without lightening or thunder that threatened. It promised much and often delivered far less. and it didn’t take long to reach his new home. He was guided by the Gods this time. He wanted her to share his city of healing. he was comforted by holding Claudia’s hand. The wind blew so strong that afternoon.A Bohemian Fool boundaries or fear. The feeling ran high for those who stayed. They did not take into their assessment the rhythm or the energy that flew in from out of town. He had no ticket to return. He wanted to go with Claudia. he would always remember it with warmth as it took him back to himself. When the storms did come it reminded its inhabitants they were in fact still alive and had not passed on to some heavenly shore. He learnt how to love again and he learnt to love himself. There was no rain or really much cloud at first. it ended a war within him. They were so far apart but their telephone conversations were rich and helped to keep him in touch with things. but it rarely did. as there were so many better places elsewhere. wait. it was hard to walk against the wind as the light dimmed. The small market across the road closed early and people hid inside burger restaurants and ice cream parlours. Dominic was a passenger in a car from the airport. 159 . but the memories were scattered far and wide. but for those who never came. to retreat from someone else’s internal war. It felt as if something was always going to happen. He found a small restaurant full of beautiful people. they said. unpacked. Dominic might have. We must try to never betray another person. it took the sand up into the air and into eyes that looked upon the entrance to the ocean. The threat was enough to send everyone home as the sky darkened. One day he knew that he wanted to return there and walk along the promenade and taste the water from the springs.
It had history to attend to and it had its future to address. However. a necessary evil that interspersed reality. The odd homeless person could be seen living on the streets. This unobtrusive method worked for her and she received the odd dollar from time to time. Normal service resumed the next day. The hours waiting for their service are naturally not shown. She sat reading a newspaper or magazine. in fact. none of this touched the lives of the residents. large ones partly waxed and proudly carried had not been submerged by the newest of eras. only the unwanted attention of drunken or other street men. Surprisingly. like a ski slope in winter. Another man played the blues on his mouth organ. She rarely asked for money. Some swam whilst the lifeguards casually monitored their activities. housed with indelibly stamped markings from their time. Neither function nor form took precedent. He carried bags and bags of newspapers. The reputation of those men with their boards. She smelt hideously and begged not to be close to anyone. aided the expenditure ahead. whilst others begged for money. as their lives merged into one long and overdue holiday on a daily basis. The issues were simplistic and the costs associated met by many ways. The beach contained its usual numbers of young people. They each had a story that no one wanted to hear. only looked longingly. They were characterised by the models shown and needed to now aspire to an edited version of themselves. A woman sat outside the cash machine. at least it was warm most of the year and they would not suffer from frostbite. The cameras follow their every move along the beach. for its speciality was not measurable and its development mattered little to those who came. especially by the ocean where it seemed to reflect it more. but where was not known. the snow glistening and shining. but its magnitude could not be categorised in a marketing plan. blue skies topped with sunshine to warm those aching bones and ensure sunglasses were always worn as the light was very bright. it was only temporary and did not trouble those undertaking the labour at low hourly rates. Another man stood outside a cup cake shop discussing the issues in his mind with the window. Work. but the majority watched and swam a little. 160 . her hair long and matted in a grey strip. Another passed a note saying he was deaf and dumb and could he have a dollar. their notoriety and expertise paraded weekly on television. At night they were not to be seen and hid from this threat. which he placed on the ground next to him. playing and displaying their beautiful bodies carefully tanning each section to emulate a perfect form.Chapter 21 – Bohemia to Bondi leaving their contribution on a small collection of buildings. A reality depicted and neatly packaged into a half hour production does not show the whole story. dangerous work. they were still volunteers and this was unpaid work. asking for a spare dollar. drank a little and danced some more. social interaction was the primary consideration.
and another perspective of a world they were yet to see. It was starting to 161 . but it was not an inspirational place for everyone. he wasn’t noticed. All who came to its perfectly constructed. but natural shoreline. the visitors that stayed and who came to discover paradise alongside the local Australian’s who sought to discover them. she had all the reasons lined up and felt no sorrow or guilt. he merged into the background. no-one knowing where he came from or where he had been. it was not clear how long this need would last and where it would take them. What they found was a different variety of perfection. he had the odd days where gloom returned and he still wrote emails detailing his feelings. It was the busiest time of year which stretched the areas facilities to their fullest.A Bohemian Fool The rest of the city was like any other. and there were a multitude of problems. it was a Mecca for the young. Much time had passed. They were replaced with the brave travellers who carved out a life on this harsh soil. Where this was heading was always unclear. filtered and watered down over a few hundred years. which was also phased out of service. She was settled into a pattern of denial. This was the end of the tram line until 1960. The cafes and small restaurants were all full. tourist attractions and nightlife and incredibly sprawling suburbs that went for many kilometres until the dividing range ceased the growth with its hilly terrain. Its original inhabitants dispersed and phased out. despite them having a need for each other. did not find the same experiences. But Laura rarely answered them. except he continually got better. discover what musical event was happening or get a lift to Queensland. to the unsuspecting Dominic. she had offloaded those years before. it had not been maintained. he was older than the population in general. streets that races took places in the middle of the night between drunken visitors to expel any energy they had left. The apartment was run down. It gave Dominic the space to push back to normality under the care of Claudia. He didn’t want to miss the coming age of Aquarius and he was settling down with Claudia in their Bondi sanctuary. Notices to this effect were pasted onto any vacant board on any of its main streets. The shielded bays of paradise were available to those who had ventured this far across the globe. It was summer on this day. Here you could buy vehicles. Dominic liked it here. He went for his walks as often as he could. it was the most easterly point in the Eastern Suburbs. from overseas. He rounded the cliffs never daring to consider jumping off. little had changed for Dominic. Those who lived within its boundaries considered it a great city. hotspots and low-lights. pushing prices with a housing shortage well over market rates. The reputation of the place. The normal attributes mattered little in a place shaped in a different direction. share an apartment. go to a garage sale. The upside of all of this was it was a ‘cool’ place to live. different to what they had seen posted on various Internet sites. but it bothered no one.
but often to quieten his busy mind. and she didn’t try to avert it. He had never felt more content. She was happy to no longer deal with her kids. she offered little support to them and since the day she met her boy. emotionally and physically. It meant different things too. his son moved down to Bondi after another series of unfortunate events. not just in his mind either. nothing had changed. There were the kids. but home for him now was a different place. 162 . it offered a wider range of possibilities and a broader perspective. he had stopped looking for Isis. he couldn’t fail to recover. but still things got in the way. Dominic couldn’t believe this.Chapter 21 – Bohemia to Bondi feel good for Dominic. Now. There were many positive things happening as he felt as if he must just follow his destiny now. There were times he did it naturally. He found this the hardest to bear. But. annoying aspects of the fall out of Laura’s actions. His daughter shifted in a hurry to Melbourne. he meditated again. husband. not every week. most importantly. Laura began to be isolated. it seemed to him. Claudia loved Dominic so comprehensively. maybe the afterlife was strange. He was hoping to go home still. he had it all. it held precious things higher and not simpler things. it offered such variety and things that had been lacking in his previous incarnation.
It’s always about some other place. He had finally said goodbye to tired old Europe. he didn’t enjoy old German singalong tunes. Winning the Czech League for the first time was a major achievement. Dominic included. the man who fell hopelessly in love with young men who were not gay and were always in relationships with women. wherever you are. and a fanfare was played applicable for a bohemian fool. He sought the new world once again as he had yet to appreciate it. some $200. Laura will never be happy without Dominic.Konec Dominic went from the obscure to the sublime. Ice hockey is as entertaining as football. his will. Women are people.000 was split four ways. and then loathe. He owned his own sanity now in a natural way. but Dominic found a way to avoid this on a daily basis. Not just holidays. It really is a German town and this country will probably find itself once again at the centre of the latest political manoeuvring and leave it in the middle of another war. it can be sold in many forms. He no longer regretted anything. but he just might be. its historical sadness and depth of culture. not money. but its products too. He could comfort himself with real things. Tony. He was set to continue his astral journey. Smoking makes you choke. Selfishness is the root of all evil. Living with no sex and ceasing to chase women was an enlightening and purifying experience. The past or his life would not shape his destiny. He was still alive and decided that love itself was within him. which was only a statement of his insecurity. Ignorance abounded with its usual intensity. Learning to live with himself. died just before Easter. No more diversions were required or sought just to obtain sanity. he thought it was boring whether you knew the words or not. love. and he once spent a paranoid 6 months there as Laura and him escaped once again. A wondrous four months followed by a further period of being loved was the method to recover. He decided that Weiss beer is indeed more useful than the spring water in the small city of Karlovy Vary. In the words of John Martyn poet and singer who also died during this 163 . his young men who were his friends were unable to understand. as it’s not seen. as he no longer needed alternatives to survive. Living without the responsibility of others and calming storms was truly freedom. He had moved from the hidden to the exposed and lost his marriage. as a man you love. a revelation. As much as Dominic liked the accordion. He no longer tolerated mediocrity in himself. its diversity waits. passion and hope. The future looked bright and exciting. Sydney is a beautiful city unexplored as yet. as if to punish himself time and time again in a weird conundrum. The number 13 is really Dominic’s lucky number.A Bohemian Fool Chapter 22 . surprisingly. despite everything. he had been sidelined for 2 years. He was no longer under duress.
A bohemian life. He went to see her once in a home and she pleaded with him to help her run away. ‘may you never lose your woman overnight. it did not feature any content of note. Under the duress of the menopause and the stress from guilt. Dominic had one of these events and nearly the second happen to him and he cried until one day he stopped. he leant to live without her. He wept for her. and one. but he could still see. resident fool. It was one she didn’t want to come out of. Dominic was deeply saddened by her demise. despite her causing his own. Dominic was not able to care for her so repeated history and there she remained. Laura’s mental health declined to the degree that she was admitted to a hospital when her new husband left her for a woman his own age. always on the brink of something new. it delivered as promised. but always ran with a saddened heart. or a moment or two in the life of Dominic. it had no conclusion. He missed her. should not be outside the norms of our perception where we need to classify them as such. only a wry look at a brief moment of time that eclipsed the rest in its value but only at that time.Chapter 22 . entertaining the staff with her collection of stories and jokes until one day she fell down the stairs and went into a coma. Its benefits were obvious and it’s pain indescribable. but none of these mattered to those who did not care to know. but it clearly took Dominic into an affray he neither sought nor wished for. but they were destined to destroy each other it seemed. we should not treat lightly as if our ‘reason to be’ is one we dare not contemplate. as he once had loved her. She was devastated. And so this bohemian tale is complete. The human condition is a temporary one. Her demise came and she didn’t recover. and it had no story to follow neatly or was not crafted with any elegant twists and turns.Konec time. it is just a region layered in history and its inhabitants are people the same as anywhere. she had asked the same question of her brother when she was six and in a children’s home. her Algerian young boy couldn’t comprehend what was happening. may you never make your bed out in the cold’. She never did run. She loved Dominic with all her heart. it was just a collection of feelings summed up sometimes in verse and occasionally in a traditional manner and style befitting its location. it aspired to being a mere interlude of sentiment. until she grew up and she never did stop until she was incarcerated. It was just another tale of the human condition that continued in some form of ascent into perhaps more delusion or perhaps not. this time. Dominic did. His eyes were permanently damaged. but it had been a long time since they were together. It was steeped in history that needed not to be explained. It had sharp edges and clean lines in which to pin memories upon. there was no more madness and no more unrestricted fun. But there was no one to assist her any longer. 164 . she had previously started to show clear signs of where she was heading.
It was steeped in history that needed not to be explained. It was just another tale of the human condition that continued in some form of ascent into perhaps more delusion or perhaps not. it did not feature any content of note. it had no conclusion. It had sharp edges and clean lines in which to pin memories upon. Trznice-krásná žena-orlojem Zimni-Zdravi-Voda-Rodina-Penize Svobody-Laska-Bratrsky-Rovnost Nedele-Hlupak-Snih-Duchovni Zapsat-Blazinek-TurexNerozumny-Bohemia to Bondi-Konec . it aspired to being a mere interlude of sentiment. this time. but it clearly took Dominic into an affray he neither sought nor wished for. it was just a collection of feelings summed up sometimes in verse and occasionally in a traditional manner and style beﬁtting its location.And so this bohemian tale is complete. it delivered as promised. only a wry look at a mere moment of time that eclipsed the rest in its value but only at that time. and it had no story to follow neatly or was not crafted with any elegant twists and turns. Its beneﬁts were obvious and it’s pain indescribable. but none of these mattered to those who did not care to know.
This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
We've moved you to where you read on your other device.
Get the full title to continue listening from where you left off, or restart the preview.