Based On The Graphic Novels by Bryan Lee O'Malley



by Edgar Wright and Michael Bacall

WHITE February 2, BLUE February 18, PINK March 4, YELLOW March 6, GREEN March 9, GOLDENROD March 12, BUFF March 23, SALMON March 25, CHERRY April 3, TAN June 22, GRAY July 13, ORCHID August 6, DOUBLE BLUE August 28, ADDITIONAL May 13, 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2009 2010

Notice: This material is the property of SP Film Productions, Inc and is intended and restricted solely for studio use by studio personnel. Distribution or disclosure of the material to unauthorized persons is prohibited. The sale, copying or reproduction of this material in any form is also prohibited.



EXT. TORONTO RESIDENTIAL STREET - DAY Snowy suburbs of Toronto. From a nondescript house we hear: KIM PINE (O.S.) Scott Pilgrim is dating a high schooler?



INT. STEPHEN STILLS’ KITCHEN - DAY Four twenty-somethings lounge around a small kitchen table. STEPHEN STILLS, 25, shaggy hair, Canadian Cowboy chic.


KIM PINE, 22, cute, bitter, sweatshirt with a zipper. KIM PINE How old are you now, Scott? Like twenty-eight?

SCOTT I’m not playing your little games. KIM PINE So you’ve been out of high school for like, 13 years andSCOTT (O.S.) I'm twenty-two. Twenty-two!

YOUNG NEIL, 20, simple mind, layered T-shirts. YOUNG NEIL Like, did you guys 'do it' yet?

SCOTT PILGRIM, 22, fresh faced and charmingly cocky with an unruly yet adorable mop of hair. SCOTT We have done many things. We ride the bus. We have meaningful conversations about how yearbook club went and about her friends and, know...drama. STEPHEN STILLS Yeah, okay, have you even kissed her?



STEPHEN STILLS And you're dating a high school girl? Not bad, not bad.








1A. 2

SCOTT We almost held hands once, but then she got embarrassed.






SCOTT (O.. RATING: AWESOME. TEXT appears in an on-screen box: "SCOTT PILGRIM. 17.S. books scattering everywhere. THE BUS . Knives looks up to see the cute and gallant SCOTT PILGRIM holding her books.. 2 KIM PINE Well. demanding. Scott grins heroically. KNIVES CHAU T SCOTT I believe I mentioned the bus? A Young Neil pauses his Nintendo DS. Scott winks at the camera..INTEGRATED FINAL 2 CONTINUED: (2) 2. STEPHEN STILLS (under his breath) Chinese. She's Chinese. Knives crouches down to pick up her books.) Hey. MOTHER CHAU. 45. grumbling. B A Mom! F KNIVES CHAU. Scott winks at Knives." Stars appear in Knives's eyes. cute and innocent with clothes to match. Aren't you pleased as punch? STEPHEN STILLS So. 22 YEARS OLD. what's her name? SCOTT (pleased as punch) Knives Chau.NIGHT 3 MOTHER CHAU You are seventeen year old! Time to get interested in boy! Knives DROPS her bag. YOUNG NEIL Wicked! How'd you meet her? Scott Pilgrim prepares to tell an amazing story: 3 INT. MOTHER CHAU You drop book. . sits next to her mother..

. STEPHEN STILLS’ KITCHEN . 4 INT.INTEGRATED FINAL 2A. everyone looks at Scott. KIM PINE Is that seriously the end of the story? 4 B A (CONTINUED) F T A ..DAY Back in the kitchen.

STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE . hey. SCOTT She’ll geek. 5 An eager Knives stands outside. really. B A Hey. STEPHEN STILLS I mean. STEPHEN STILLS So when do we get to meet her? KIM PINE Oh please. Please be good. Scott smiles broadly. I want her to geek out on us.INTEGRATED FINAL 4 CONTINUED: 3. SCOTT Oh. KNIVES CHAU Of course I'll be good! KNIVES CHAU Am I normally not? Stephen Stills comes to the door and peers through. Young Neil unpauses his Nintendo DS. this is Stephen Stills. STILLS shuts the door on a confused Knives. She has the capacity to geek. 5 INT/EXT. He's the talent. STEPHEN STILLS F SCOTT No. Knives. Let it be soon. She geeks. It is.DAY A SCOTT That’s for me. STEPHEN STILLS Is she gonna geek out on us? SCOTT She'll just sit in the corner. man. Scott opens the door a crack. DINGY DONG! The doorbell rings. T (CONTINUED) SCOTT You promise to be good? . 4 SCOTT Yes.

B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 5 CONTINUED: 3A. 5 Stephen Stills quickly opens the door and waves Knives in.

KNIVES CHAU That is so awesome..INTEGRATED FINAL 5 CONTINUED: (2) 4.. (CONTINUED) .yes. that’s Young Neil. ratty rug..Zelda. Amps hum to life. . what was your name? KIM PINE (O.. Lemme get your coat. SCOTT Knives. bass. drums. 5 STEPHEN STILLS You’re good. STEPHEN STILLS That's not the actual title of the- B A SCOTT Knives. sorry. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE .DAY Knives enters. YOUNG NEIL Oh. I’m not in the band. KNIVES CHAU Hi. SCOTT Let's start with Launchpad McQuack. Knives waves.. Sex Bob-Omb has geared up.that’s kind of a big question. F KIM PINE T A Scott throws Knives' coat on the floor.. who finally gets it. 6 INT.. guitar. What do you play? YOUNG NEIL Uh. LAME BRAND amps.Tetris.. looking around the rehearsal pad with awe: Bare bulb. 6 KNIVES CHAU Hi.S. wow. REVEAL Kim sitting behind the drumset.) KNIVES CHAU You play the drums? Kim. sticks in her hands. that’s Kim. I just live here. Knives stares blankly at Young Neil. KNIVES CHAU Wow.

EVENING T 8 The band and Young Neil lounge around Stephen Stills’ room. Kim.Sex Bob-Omb. if your life had a face I would punch it. YOUNG NEIL She seems awesome.... SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD TITLES continue over the song as the small rehearsal space seems to GROW with the music. 7 EXT.wait.are so. KNIVES CHAU I can't even. jaw ajar. STEPHEN STILLS’ ROOM . 7 Scott bids adieu to a stunned Knives as she gets on a bus. Amazing. Stephen Stills barks unintelligable lyrics. STEPHEN STILLS She seems nice. feedback lingering. Yeaaah.. SPELLING OUT OUR TITLE.. The song ends. SCOTT B A Yeaaah. what? KIM PINE I mean. Knives watches.. 6 KIM PINE WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB! 1-2-3-4! Kim BASHES the kit and Sex Bob-Omb EXPLODE INTO ROCK! GUITAR AND BASS LEADS LEAP INTO THE AIR.amazing. do I have ulterior motives or something? I’m offended... SCOTT KIM PINE Scott. SCOTT Yeaaah.. BUS STOP . are you really happy or are you really evil? SCOTT Like.EVENING A KNIVES CHAU You guys. F (CONTINUED) ..INTEGRATED FINAL 6 CONTINUED: 5. 8 INT.

arched eyebrow. B A WALLACE Is he cute? SCOTT Ha. yes. FUTON included. He turns to WALLACE WELLS. You're totally my bitch forever.. 9 Scott hangs his coat up in a tiny. TINY BOXES OF TEXT indicate the ownership of the items in the one room flat: 95% belongs to Wallace. dark hair. The whole seventeen year old thing. she seems awesome. 8 STEPHEN STILLS Wounded even? SCOTT Hurt. SCOTT Yeaaaah. ha. 24 YEARS OLD. turns to Young Neil. FUN FACT: HE IS GAY!" SCOTT Before you hear some dirty lies from someone else. ha.. you were saying she seems awesome. KIM PINE You? Hurt? Scott takes a breath. I'm dating a 17 year old. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . "WALLACE WELLS. Kim. Wallace looks up from the NOW magazine he’s reading. SCOTT Neil. ROOMMATE. Don’t tell too many people.EVENING A 9 (CONTINUED) YOUNG NEIL Yeah. disloyal. ha. WALLACE Yeah. one room apartment. . SCOTT So.INTEGRATED FINAL 8 CONTINUED: 6. WALLACE Does this mean we have to stop sleeping together? SCOTT Do you see another bed in here? F T INT.


Who told you? STACEY Wallace. STACEY A seventeen year old Chinese schoolgirl? You’re ridiculous. 9 SCOTT I mean. SCOTT Wallace! B Wallace clicks off." A STACEY (O. The phone goes. peppy barista.) You know me. STACEY With the uniform and everything? A F T "STACEY PILGRIM. Duh. gabbing on her cellphone in THE SECOND CUP. SCOTT That gossipy bitch. YOUNGER SISTER. Scott picks up. Intercut with STACEY PILGRIM. cute.S. SCOTT Who are you texting? RINGY RING. you will not be served”. WALLACE (O. STACEY Who is this mysterious child you date? SCOTT Her name is Knives. RATING: 'T' FOR TEEN. WALLACE You know me.INTEGRATED FINAL 9 CONTINUED: (2) 7. SCOTT It's a Catholic school too. Knives Chau. Scott turns to see Wallace on a second cordless. starts texting. Wallace tosses the NOW magazine aside.) Seventeen years old? Scandal! (CONTINUED) .S. Scott sinks into an armchair. Don’t tell my sister. A sign behind her reads “If you are using your cellphone. SCOTT That’s not true. 19.

(CONTINUED) . Why are you doing this? STACEY It's been over a year since you got dumped by she-who-will-not-be-named..simple. you know? It's just. CATHOLIC SCHOOL . Uniformed boys and girls pour out. so I wouldn't call it dating. SCOTT Can I get back to you on that? A SCHOOL BELL clangs loudly. STACEY Um. Scott glances down at the partially obscured NOW magazine. or is this just you being insane? Scott looks at a strip of photobooth pictures: he smiles next to a hot redhead in happier times.. SCOTT Well. Even I would think twice about dating a seventeen year old. you haven’tSCOTT No no no. more like.DAY Wallace and Scott stand outside a CATHOLIC HIGH SCHOOL... We haven’t even held hands. SCOTT This school has boys too.. 9 SCOTT Yeah. the whole deal. are you legitimately moving on. I think she hugged me once.INTEGRATED FINAL 9 CONTINUED: (3) 8. she's only allowed out when the sun is up. At all. 10 EXT. F T A SCOTT I don't know. STACEY (CONT’D)’s just nice. Scott. WALLACE I hate you. looking into the HOT GIRL’S EYES on the back cover album ad. STACEY Oh my God.... 10 B A WALLACE I do not want to be here.

B A (CONTINUED) F T A . 10 WALLACE Playtime? SCOTT That doesn't sound so good either.INTEGRATED FINAL 10 CONTINUED: 8A.

DAY 11 They punch and kick in unison.. like. 10 KNIVES CHAU (O.. They changed it over here because Puck-Man is too easy to vandalize. 11 INT.. T A WALLACE Yes. you go now! Begone! Wallace pulls Knives close. You know. counting down: 10. Whispers. WALLACE You're too good for him.. She digs for quarters. Does he wear glasses? . The game ends. Run. SCOTT Did you know the original name of Pacman was Puck-man? You would think it's because Pac-Man looks like a yellow hockey puck.9. scratch out the P and turn it into an F or whatever? Knives flips over Scott’s back in a COMBO Scott looks at Knives. THE ARCADE . SCOTT Yeah.. KNIVES CHAU Ohmigod. hi! Do you want to know who in my class is gay? SCOTT Wallace. KNIVES CHAU Oh... I got it! B A F Scott and Knives play NINJA NINJA REVOLUTION (think a martial arts version of DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION). Her shy friend TAMARA lingers behind.S.. Wallace Wells. SCOTT Hey Knives.INTEGRATED FINAL 10 CONTINUED: (2) 9. but actually it comes from the Japanese phrase paku-paku which means to flap ones mouth open and closed. He’s gay. CONTINUE appears. this is my cool gay roommate. side by side. Wow.) Scott! Heyyyy! Knives skips to Scott. KNIVES CHAU Oh.

THE GOODWILL . KNIVES CHAU Tamara is into this Korean guy. SCOTT I knew I personally rocked.DAY Scott and Knives flip through records in perfect sync. "PIZZA PIZZA" . but everyone thinks Bobby has a crush on Mina. F T A A13 INT. we're already pretty big. JULIE Are you coming to my party Friday or will you be busy babysitting? (CONTINUED) B A KNIVES CHAU I mean. do you have anything by 'The Clash At Demonhead'? JULIE Have you tried the section marked 'The Clash At Demonhead'? SCOTT Thank you.DAY Scott and Knives leave a pizza joint. but you guys ROCK. Thank you. STILLS’ GIRLFRIEND. Hangers click in time. SCOTT I thought Derek and Tamara had a mutual like-each-other thing going. surly with tats and specs: "JULIE. . Julie. SONIC BOOM (RECORD STORE) . KNIVES CHAU I don't listen to much music.INTEGRATED FINAL 10.DAY A13 13 Knives speaks to a female clerk. you guys are gonna be HUGE. SCOTT Well. But it might be cool if cool people wore our T-shirt. 13 INT. Bobby. I know a lot of kids who play piano or whatever. 22. Knives. slices in hand. RATING: WHAT IS HER PROBLEM?" KNIVES CHAU Excuse me. but I never suspected that we rocked as a unit. 12 EXT. what happened? 12 Scott and Knives shop for T-shirts.

13 SCOTT Thank you. Julie. (MORE) B A (CONTINUED) F T A . (to Knives) You don’t want to listen to her.INTEGRATED FINAL 13 CONTINUED: 10A.

15 EXT. I've. I heart them so much.. KNIVES CHAU So this is your secret lair? Can I come in? B A . KNIVES CHAU . SCOTT Me neither. SCOTT I hearted them too until they signed to a major label and the singer turned into a total bitch and ruined my life. F KNIVES CHAU I mean. WALLACE'S APARTMENT .DAY T A 14 15 (CONTINUED) KNIVES CHAU (oblivious) Envy Adams is sooo cool. man! KNIVES CHAU I've never even kissed a guy. SCOTT You go out with a lot of guys? Knives blushes and looks at the ground. But that’s just me. SNOWY TORONTO STREET .DAY Scott and Knives walk up to the front of Wallace's apartment... so whatever.I've never gone out with someone so talented. SCOTT Sorry. 13 Scott puts The Clash at Demonhead CD back in the rack.INTEGRATED FINAL 13 CONTINUED: (2) SCOTT (cont'd) And you definitely don’t want to listen to them. Do you read her blog? Scott and Knives amble down a snow covered sidewalk. you were saying about me? 14 EXT.. Scott hugs her. KNIVES CHAU Oh. SCOTT Yeah.

KNIVES CHAU Oh. rubbing his eyes.. She is hotter than the desert sun. skirt and goggles. an army SCOTT Here you go. 15 SCOTT My secret lair is one of those 'no girls allowed' deals. . SCOTT But do you want to see the house where I grew up? KNIVES CHAU Sure. 17 INT... 17 B A SCOTT Oh God. But she's gone... Wind blows.. okay. Wallace wakes up to the left of Scott. He falls to his knees next to a lonely cactus.Scott wanders alone through a barren land.. A MYSTERIOUS GIRL rollerblades across the shifting sands. You're just having some idiotic alone. The light snowfall turns into sand..HOTTEST DAY T A They literally walk across the street to a small house. SCOTT Does that mean we can make out? F 16 EXT. sitting up in the FUTON. Wow. She wears fishnets. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . THE DREAM DESERT . SCOTT Oh God.SCOTT WAKES UP.? . MYSTERIOUS GIRL You're not alone. Her pink hair is funky but cool. KNIVES CHAU SCOTT Yeah.INTEGRATED FINAL 15 CONTINUED: 12. 16 (CONTINUED) .. Wow....

six in the morning. Other Scott goes back to sleep... WALLACE Speaking of new. 17 WALLACE What is it. F T A . WALLACE Girl? OTHER SCOTT Was this an Envy related dream? WALLACE We don’t use the E-word in this house. weren't you supposed to take your fake high school girlfriend to the library a half-hour ago? SCOTT What? It's like. it wasn’t her. It was somebody new. Scott? SCOTT I had this totally weird dream. goateed guy wakes right between Scott and Wallace: "OTHER SCOTT.INTEGRATED FINAL 17 CONTINUED: 13. OTHER VOICE Oh God. WALLACE What is it. WALLACE’S BOYFRIEND? FUN FACT: GUY CURIOUS" OTHER SCOTT Can we skip the dreamtime? Color me not interested. 22. Scott? A scruffy. SCOTT No. Scott opens the bathroom door.. SCOTT But there was this girl.. Sunlight ignites the room. Wallace rubs his eyes. SCOTT (CONT'D) Arrrrgh! B A OTHER SCOTT Yay for that.


INTEGRATED FINAL 18 CONTINUED: 14. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE . Scott’s gaze follows the GIRL as she blades out of the library. He carries a stack of books for Knives. SCOTT It was.uh. KNIVES CHAU I’ hand slipped. STEPHEN STILLS Let's do that one again.) 19 Scott stands in the rehearsal room. SCOTT Libraries remind me of grade school.. STEPHEN STILLS (O. Time slows to a crawl. B A T The Rollerblading Girl delivers a package from AMAZON. Pensive guitar underscores his thoughts. KIM PINE Is your girlfriend distracting you? SCOTT My girlfriend? A meek Knives sits next to Young Neil on the couch. Let’s talk about something else. KNIVES CHAU That must seem like a reeeeally long time ago. head still in the clouds. 18 Scott is noticeably taller than all the teens in the library... A The hiss of ball bearings catches Scott’s attention.. I’ll be quieter...EVENING F Scott continues to stare at the girl. (CONTINUED) .CA to the librarian. KNIVES CHAU Do you know that girl? KNIVES CHAU Scott? SCOTT! 19 INT. SCOTT Uh. He freezes as he sees THE ROLLERBLADING GIRL FROM HIS DREAM skating towards the desk in SEXALICIOUS SLOW MOTION. STEPHEN STILLS You only played one note for that entire song.S.

there may be some label guys there.this sucks. KIM PINE We're going to this party.NIGHT STEPHEN STILLS I told you like fifty times! Scott. what are we doing? 20 EXT. SCOTT . Kim Pine. TORONTO RESIDENTIAL STREET . so. Scott exits frame. This is going to suck. man.. F SCOTT Aw. I thought you guys split. SCOTT I'm going to go pee due to boredom.NIGHT A SCOTT Awww maaan. But.. 19 SCOTT Sorry. 20 STEPHEN STILLS We did... Stephen Stills and Young Neil walk down an icy Toronto street. Party? YOUNG NEIL At Julie's. retard. Scott's head is still in the clouds... T SCOTT Ugh. YOUNG NEIL I have to pee. YOUNG NEIL Sucks. KIM PINE At least it will give us something to complain about. A (CONTINUED) SCOTT .INTEGRATED FINAL 19 CONTINUED: 15. you know. 21 INT. JULIE'S HOUSE . 21 B A bored Scott stands next to Young Neil in a very crowded house party. Both have red plastic cups in hand.


15A. 21

Neil sips his drink. Scott passes by COMEAU, a bespectacled hipster geek: ‘COMEAU, 25, FUN FACT: KNOWS EVERYONE (INCLUDING YOU)’ SCOTT Hey Comeau. COMEAU Hey Scott. Some party huh? You gettin’ your drink on?







16. 21

SCOTT This is Coke Zero. I don’t drink. COMEAU You don’t drink? I remember you getting ridiculously drunk off two G&T’s one time andSCOTT (quickly) Comeau, you know everyone, right? COMEAU Pretty much. SCOTT Do you know this one girl with hair like this?

Scott sketches an incomprehensible drawing of Ramona. COMEAU Yeah man. Ramona Flowers. Someone said she was coming tonight actually. SCOTT WHAT? COMEAU You got the hots for her? I hear she's hardcore... Scott has already left a Scott-shaped dust cloud... 22 INT. JULIE'S HOUSE - MOMENTS LATER






Scott scans the party. His eyes go WIDE. He CRUSHES his plastic cup. There she is...playing the wall...RAMONA! Aloof. Enigmatic. Hot. Scott sidles up and stands next to her.

Scott begins to babble.


SCOTT Hey, what's up? Nothing. SCOTT Hey, you know Pacman? RAMONA I know of him.



17. 22

SCOTT Well you know Pac-Man was originally Puckman but not because Pac-Man looks like a hockey puck and paku-paku-paku means flapping your mouth and they changed it because if you scratch out the "P" and turn it into an "F”? You know? Like... RAMONA Yeah that's amazing.

Ramona looks at Scott blankly. He slowly skulks away. SCOTT (CONT'D) I'll leave you alone forever now.

Series of quick shots as Scott follows Ramona. He ducks around corners, spies from behind a much bigger dude. Ramona leaves the party. Scott grabs a startled Young Neil. DUDE! WHA?


JUMP CUT. Scott RUNS towards Comeau. SCOTT DUDE. What do you know about Ramona Flowers?! COMEAU All I know is she’s American. SCOTT (exotically) American...










SCOTT I dreaming?

INTEGRATED FINAL 22 CONTINUED: (2) 17A. 22 COMEAU But you should talk to Sandra and Monique"SANDRA AND MONIQUE. TWO GIRLS COMEAU KNOWS" SCOTT LADYDUDES! What do you know about Ramona Flowers? B A (CONTINUED) F T A . 24.

PARTYGOER #4 She’s got some battle scars. B A PARTYGOER #5 Not to be entered into lightly JULIE What about Ramona Flowers? SCOTT You know her? Tell me. Scott does not. Jools? F T JUMP CUT through a FLURRY OF FACES as Scott asks everyone about Ramona: A (CONTINUED) The girls laugh. SCOTT Does she really? STEPHEN STILLS Didn't you say she just broke up with someone. Now. SANDRA Some guy back in New York. 22 MONIQUE I think she has a boyfriend. SCOTT Yeah.Flowers. It’s so “Ramona Quimby. MONIQUE Doesn’t she have the most ridiculous name? SANDRA I know.. JULIE She just moved here. arms crossed. Aged 8” and yet. What else? PARTYGOER #1 I heard she kicks all kind of ass. Stephen Stills is with her.. PARTYGOER #2 She’s on another level. Comes into my work.INTEGRATED FINAL 22 CONTINUED: (3) 18. . We end on the surly JULIE (the rude clerk) who steps in front of Scott. Got a job with Amazon. PARTYGOER #3 She’s got men dying at her feet.

22 SCOTT Did she reeally? STEPHEN STILLS That they had a huge fight or whatever? SCOTT Did they reeeally? JULIE .yes. Stephen.. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . But I didn't want Scott to know that.INTEGRATED FINAL 22 CONTINUED: (4) 18A..

SCOTT looks to KIM. she justJULIE Scott. let’s leave it at that. JULIE That time with HollieSCOTT Not what it looked like! JULIE That time you dumped Kim forSCOTT Hey. I forbid you from hitting on Ramona. Even if you haven't had a real girlfriend in over a yearSTEPHEN STILLS Hey whoa. Ramona is out of your league. I don't know what it is about that girl. A JULIE Dating a high schooler is the mourning period. SCOTT That’s garbage! Completely untrue. T SCOTT I thought you guys broke up. JULIE Whatever. whoa. We all know you’re a total lady killer wannabe jerky jerk. F JULIE I don’t want you scaring off the coolest girl at my party Scott. He’s totally dating a high schooler.INTEGRATED FINAL 22 CONTINUED: (5) 19. Scott’s mourning period is officially over. (MORE) (CONTINUED) B A JULIE That time with LisaSCOTT Misunderstanding. . STEPHEN STILLS She’s got a point. We hear the sound of arctic winds. me and Kim are all good now. 22 SCOTT Yeah.

. Okay. SCOTT I think she’s.. SCOTT So.INTEGRATED FINAL 22 CONTINUED: (6) JULIE (cont'd) And anyway.can I pretend we're talking about a guy? SCOTT So then I'm at this party. WALLACE Library. F T (CONTINUED) A .. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . WALLACE You think he’s. landing next to Scott.. she justJULIE Forget it Scott!!! 23 INT. WALLACE Guess who's druuunk? SCOTT I guess Wallace. From my dream. WALLACE There he is. Wallace storms in. 20. Wallace flops onto the futon. WALLACE Girl. 22 SCOTT (not listening) Yeah. SCOTT I think she’s the girl of my dreams. that girl... I don't know what it is about that girl. She keeps mentioning some guy named Gideon. and hey! There she is... B A SCOTT I saw her at the library..NIGHT Scott lies on the futon. WIDE awake.. I’m not even sure she really did have a big breakup. 23 WALLACE You guess right.

.. who is out cold.INTEGRATED FINAL 23 CONTINUED: 21. 23 WALLACE Mmm. cellphone in hand.girlfriend.. Who told you? STACEY Duh. SCOTT Don’t you have a job to do? STACEY You’re right. Wallace drifts off. RINGY RING! Scott answers. you should break up with your fake high school girlfriend. B A STACEY Well.. F SCOTT T A (CONTINUED) .. Then you should break up with your fake high school girlfriend. SCOTT What’s that? Break. INTERCUT with STACEY sitting on a bus on her cellphone.fake.high school. SCOTT He's not even conscious! STACEY Whatever. WALLACE Then you should break up with your fake high school girlfriend. Wallace.. SCOTT Wait.. WALLACE SCOTT I’m not getting it. STACEY You’re thinking of juggling two chicks!? Not even! Scott looks to Wallace.. friend.. You of all people should know how sucky it is to get cheated on.. I should send out a mass text about this.up. SCOTT I’ve never been so sure about something. Bye.

THIS IS. It has come to my attention that we will be fighting soon. T COMPUTER "You've got mail!" A (CONTINUED) WALLACE .. WALLACE Scott. . My name is Matthew Patel....INTEGRATED FINAL 23 CONTINUED: (2) 22. 23 SCOTT Wallace.. This is. Pilgrim...” Scott walks to the front door. how do you do that? HARD CUT to MORNING LIGHT filling the room! SCOTT (O.hmm.. SCOTT (CONT'D) Are you waiting for the package you just ordered? A WHAT?! WALLACE I’m so happy for you... Delete! F WALLACE It’s amazing what they can do with computers these days. SCOTT Dude! This thing claims I have mail! SCOTT Dude! Now I'm reading it! B “CLICK. SCOTT "Dear Mr. What's the website for that? SCOTT Awesome! I have to order something reeeally WALLACE! Wallace sits bolt upright.!!! WALLACE SCOTT This is boring....Amazon..this is.. Moments pass. Scott sits at Wallace's computer.. and I'm" blah blah “fair warning” blah blah.

WALLACE It's the weekend. It won’t ship until Monday at the earliest. 23 SCOTT Maybe.INTEGRATED FINAL 23 CONTINUED: (3) 22A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

DAY Scott and Knives walk out of a pizza joint. KNIVES CHAU Yearbook club is getting SO boring. THE GOODWILL .INTEGRATED FINAL 23 CONTINUED: (4) 23. 26 EXT. Knives chows down on a slice.DAY F SCOTT T KNIVES CHAU Remember you were supposed to meet me at the bus stop a half-hour ago? A 24 25 26 (CONTINUED) Scott and Knives flip through the record bins. SONIC BOOM . SCOTT That's sucky. That’s cute. B 25 INT.. Knives buys a hip and trendy jacket. Scott JUMPS to his feet. out of sync. I cannot believe the music they put on while we work. SCOTT Attack hug. SCOTT You were saying? Scott opens the door. It's KNIVES CHAU! SCOTT Heyyy. Scott doesn't eat.. KNIVES CHAU Hannah broke up with Alan and now she's all into Derek. still distracted.DAY A . He plasters on his best fake smile.. Scott sits on a couch next to the DO NOT SIT sign. his thoughts elsewhere.. KNIVES CHAU Attack hug! Knives smothers Scott. PIZZA PIZZA . Uh huh. 23 DINGY DONG. SCOTT How could I possibly forget? 24 INT.

B A F T A ..INTEGRATED FINAL 26 CONTINUED: 23A. 26 KNIVES CHAU . SCOTT I tell ya'.but Tamara claims she has dibs on Derek..

The “CONTINUE?” countdown comes up. On.. (CONTINUED) . 3..EVENING 28 An excited Stills addresses Sex Bob-Omb. A NEGANINJA .. KNIVES CHAU The Toronto International Battle of The Bands?! B A STEPHEN STILLS Game on.8.S..) OH MY GOSH WHEN?! F T Scott has his little videogame head cut off. KNIVES CHAU Uh oh..INTEGRATED FINAL 24. And even better? It’s the T.DAY 27 Scott and Knives play NINJA NINJA REVOLUTION. everybody.. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE .I..B. but he messes up.squares up against Scott’s avatar. Scott winces. Scott plays halfheartedly. THE ARCADE . Scott takes a deep breath. 28 INT..10. This is never easy. KNIVES CHAU Do you want to keep going? Scott takes a long look at Knives.I think... THE MIRROR IMAGE of Scott’s videogame avatar appears on screen. his timing off.. 27 INT. KNIVES CHAU (O. NegaNinja. side by side.2. SCOTT I can never get past that guy.B.. The Rockit.9. Knives BURSTS into frame. alone by the window..1. Scott tunes his bass. STEPHEN STILLS Wednesday.. KNIVES CHAU Combo! Knives goes to flip over Scott. I think. staring out. SCOTT Um... Game... STEPHEN STILLS I got us a show.

This guy at work was like "Steve. KNIVES CHAU Is there a prize or something?! SCOTT What? Who? KNIVES CHAU You don’t know? STEPHEN STILLS Indie Producer of the millennium?! SCOTT Whoa.) Crash and the Boys. Great. Stills gestures to Knives’ home-made Sex Bob-Omb T-shirt. YOUNG NEIL T A STEPHEN STILLS Only a record deal with G-man Graves! (CONTINUED) . man.. We follow Scott as he walks in a daze to the bathroom. B A STEPHEN STILLS If we win. SCOTT won’t just be Knives wearing a Sex Bob-Omb shirt. who are you battling? STEPHEN STILLS (O. It’ll be the cool kids too.S.S. KNIVES CHAU (O. F Oh. She grabs Scott.INTEGRATED FINAL 28 CONTINUED: 25. do you know anyone in a band?" and I was like “I’m in a band” and he was like “You’re in a band?” and I was like “Yeah I’m totally in a band”KIM PINE Great story. Knives can barely contain herself. KNIVES CHAU I will do everything I can to get out of study group and come. 28 STEPHEN STILLS S’right.) Oh my gosh.

they suck. I hate them too! B A F T A STEPHEN STILLS (O.) Oh my gosh. 28 YOUNG NEIL (O.S.INTEGRATED FINAL 28 CONTINUED: (2) 25A. YOUNG NEIL I hate them! KNIVES CHAU (O.S.) Yeah.S.) That one band with Crash? And those Boys? KIM PINE Yeah that’s the one. .

A (CONTINUED) . that's okay. SCOTT F SCOTT Hi..EVENING 29 Scott pees in a state of dreamy reverie.. you've got this really convenient subspace highway running through your head that I like to use. um. It's like three miles in fifteen seconds. but then I realized how stupid that would be.the outside of WALLACE'S APARTMENT??? 31 INT. Scott exits the bathroom. Scott’s footsteps echo as he moves towards a classroom door with a STAR on it.. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE.a long. He stares at himself in the mirror.INTEGRATED FINAL 26. Scott runs after her. Is that weird? RAMONA It’s not weird at all.. DINGY DONG. (beat) Do you want to go out sometime? T Scott LEAPS out of the futon and RUNS towards the front door. THROWING IT OPEN and startling Ramona Flowers just as she presses the doorbell.? 30 . 29 INT. I was thinking about asking you out. and you were in my dream. WALLACE'S APARTMENT .. RAMONA Um. empty HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAY. The PEE BAR above his head slowly reduces.. You just have to sign for this alright? SCOTT I just woke up.MORNING 31 B A It’s not? Right.. around a corner. it's just like. down a row of LOCKERS leading to.... skating past Scott and down the hall. I dreamt you were delivering me this package. DREAM HIGH SCHOOL . no.. entering. BATHROOM . SCOTT RAMONA No. 30 INT. PACKAGE from AMAZON clutched in her hand. RAMONA FLOWERS bursts through the door..

You’re Ramona Flowers right? RAMONA That’s me. RAMONA Were you the Pac-Man guy? SCOTT No. RAMONA You know. you're like American? RAMONA Why. (CONTINUED) F T A . 31 RAMONA Oh yeah. SCOTT You don’t remember me do you? I met you at the party the other day. I forgot you guys don't have that in Canada.INTEGRATED FINAL 31 CONTINUED: 27.. SCOTT Okay well. can we just maybe just hang out sometime? Get to know each other? You're the new kid on the block. You’d be impressed. I was the other guy. SCOTT So.there are reasons for you to hang out with me? RAMONA You're all over the place.. That's how it works. I mean. That was some total ass. She gives him a need to sign for this.. am I coming off as rude? SCOTT Not at all. RAMONA You still have to sign. SCOTT But if I sign for it. Scott stands in awe of Ramona. Whatever this is? B A SCOTT It’s something really cool. RAMONA Yeah. right? I've lived here forever. you'll leave... Not even. Noooooo..

if that's cool. I just assumed you were too cool to be on time. SCOTT Either that or you need to start hanging out with me. .NIGHT 32 33 34 B A Scott finds Ramona waiting at the top of some stairs in the park. SCOTT Why are you just standing there? RAMONA Dude.. or there’s this awesome game called Ninja Ninja Revolution at- F T Scott finally signs on the dotted line.. Eight o'clock? 32 33 34 OMITTED [INTEGRATED INTO SC 34] OMITTED EXT.. will you sign for your damn package? SCOTT Done. A (CONTINUED) SCOTT Um. SCOTT Sorry. PARK .. RAMONA I need to find a new route. The Toronto skyline gleams in the night behind them. 31 SCOTT You are like. RAMONA You want me to hang out with you? RAMONA If I say yes. yeah. So.INTEGRATED FINAL 31 CONTINUED: (2) 28.. You assumed know. Oh. I'm totally waiting on you. RAMONA Well. SCOTT So what do you want to do? We could get a slice at Pizza Pizza or flip through some records at Sonic dream girl.. And throws the package straight in the trash.

B A SCOTT Was he your boyfriend? RAMONA Do you mind if we don’t get into that right now? SCOTT It’s so not interesting to me. And Gideon had always said Toronto was one of the great cities so. Scott and Ramona trudge through the snow in the empty park. RAMONA So what about you? What do you do? SCOTT I’m between jobs. RAMONA He’s. 34 RAMONA I’m not into simulated violence.a friend. SCOTT This is good. So how'd you end up in Toronto? RAMONA Just needed to escape I he your boyfriend? T A (CONTINUED) . They sit on some swings in the park..... SCOTT I’m cool with whatever you want to do. F SCOTT Is Gideon.INTEGRATED FINAL 34 CONTINUED: 29. SCOTT Oh yeah? RAMONA I got this job here. RAMONA This is good. RAMONA Between what and what? SCOTT My last job is a long story filled with sighs.

SCOTT RAMONA I was guessing from your apartment. . It’s weird. SCOTT I’m totally obsessed with you. T A (CONTINUED) Yeah. RAMONA I didn’t mean to get you obsessed. 34 RAMONA I know plenty of those. B A Um. RAMONA That’s probably because you sleep with a guy... SCOTT Is that why you left New York? RAMONA Pretty much. RAMONA Yeah. it’s certainly chilled here.INTEGRATED FINAL 34 CONTINUED: (2) 30. but you totally do! F SCOTT I just haven’t been obsessed with a girl for a long time. Chilled as in cold. SCOTT Well. RAMONA Uh. It was time to head somewhere a little more chilled.

You're too desperate to be gay. I think there's a thingy up here somewhere. SCOTT So this is a 'date'. mostly stupid. relax.. SCOTT Yeah... RAMONA I think 'act of God' is a pretty decent excuse for a lousy date. The snowfall gets heavier. you’re probably not that stupid. This whole thing is an unmitigated disaster... . 34 SCOTT It’s. we're just poor! We can't afford two beds! We're not gay! Actually. I believe you. no. SCOTT I feel so stupid. night’s not over yet. I can barely see you.. RAMONA Well. you're definitely stupid if you want to go out with me.. Isn't it like April? B The snow gets heavier still.. Ramona walks away. eh? RAMONA Did I say 'date'? Slip of the tongue.. Ramona hops off her swing. RAMONA This is ridiculous.. yeah. RAMONA Anyway.. Laughing. SCOTT (CONT'D) I'm.INTEGRATED FINAL 34 CONTINUED: (3) 31. A Tongue. Wallace is pretty gay.. RAMONA Dude. SCOTT F SCOTT Exactly. T A (CONTINUED) RAMONA Aw.

B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 34 CONTINUED: (4) 31A.. 34 SCOTT A thingy? RAMONA A door. SCOTT A door? I.. I’m blind. I. I can’t see you. Help me...

constant comment and earl grey.. vanilla walnut.very warm. white truffle. sleepytime.S. does this help? SCOTT (O. RAMONA'S APARTMENT . raspberry. F RAMONA I think I'll have sleepytime.cold! RAMONA (O. SCOTT Did you make some of those up? SCOTT That sounds good to me. Pushing it open. A RAMONA Let me get you a blanket. After a moment alone. I'm just.) Here.) That's. blueberry chamomile. RAMONA Dude! I'm changing...S. green tea with lemon and honey. T A (CONTINUED) . He wanders towards a half open door. SCOTT That would actually be awesome. He watches as she slips out of her coat. Scott and Ramona fall into blackness. What is that? B Ramona exits. 35 INT. green tea with lemon. Ramona opens the door. girl friendly apartment... ginger with honey. ginseng. Scott ventures upstairs. RAMONA What kind of tea do you want? SCOTT There's more than one kind? RAMONA We have blueberry.. liver disaster. Scott covers his eyes and our screen goes BLACK.NIGHT 35 Scott shivers at the kitchen table of Ramona’s cozy. vanilla almond. SCOTT (O. 34 A door with a STAR on it appears out of the whiteness. he finds Ramona in her bedroom in her bra and skirt.) AAAH! Sorry. green tea.INTEGRATED FINAL 34 CONTINUED: (5) 32.S. ginger without honey.

You can sleep in my bed. revealing black panties to complement black bra..kay. Scott is in heaven..since we're so cold.INTEGRATED FINAL 35 CONTINUED: 33. They look into each others eyes. RAMONA Well. SCOTT RAMONA It's not like I'm gonna send you home in a snowstorm or anything.. Not right now.kay.. F T SCOTT Maybe. RAMONA I changed my mind. They tumble onto the bed and make out.. Scott takes his shirt off.maybe we should both get under it. Ramona breaks off.. Then- B Ramona curls up next to Scott. Pilgrim. SCOTT (CONT'D) Ohh.. SCOTT Changed it to what? From what? RAMONA I don't want to have sex with circles Scott and Ramona as they begin an awesome make out session. SCOTT (CONT'D) Were you.. smiling.... A (CONTINUED) .what about our tea? SCOTT I can. 35 Scott opens his eyes to see Ramona hugging him.. Scott imagines himself soundtracking the kiss with a slinky bassline.. And I reserve the right to change my mind about the sex later.were you just going to bring the blanket from your bed? RAMONA I guess.not have tea. The slinky bassline continues as Ramona takes her skirt off.. A Ohh....

SCOTT Work? RAMONA You have to leave... RAMONA (totally unimpressed) You have a band? SCOTT Yeah.. WAIST DEEP SNOW covers the roads and sidewalks. Scott walking next to her..MORNING F 37 (CONTINUED) T “SHE’S IN THE SHOWER” A DAYLIGHT! Scott awakens. It's been like a really long time. we're terrible. just this.oh. RAMONA'S APARTMENT . . RAMONA What did you have in mind? SCOTT Umm. Please come. B A 37 EXT.that was a joke. Whatever this is. 35 SCOTT This is cool. come to the first round of this battle of the bands thing. So. RAMONA'S ROOM . SCOTT Hey. RAMONA You're welcome.MORNING 36 “NO RAMONA” Another arrow point out that- Ramona steps out of the bathroom in a towel.INTEGRATED FINAL 35 CONTINUED: (2) 34. Ramona skates towards the front gate. and this is. Scott relaxes. RAMONA I have to work. Ramona is gone. An arrow points to the empty spot in the bed next to him. They exchange a smile. I didn't even get any... thanks. Then without warning we jump cut to 36 INT. can this not be a one night stand? For one thing.I think I needed this.


Scott Pilgrim. his social skills vanish.. She holds hands with a guy wearing glasses. . ‘RAMONA FLOWERS. xxxxxxx‘ SCOTT Wow. WALLACE Hey. I’m Stacey. girl number. I did totally come.. Scott is so amazed at her presence. THE ROCKIT .NIGHT A 38 (CONTINUED) RAMONA See you at the show. Ramona wades through a grungy venue under the stare of young hipsters. B A F T 38 INT. right back next to Scott. SCOTT You totally came! RAMONA Yes. reaching Scott at the bar. She hands him a note. He’s chronically enfeebled. far away. 37 Ramona shrugs and ROLLERBLADES through the snow. SCOTT Oh..At The- “THE ROCKIT. STACEY And this is my boyfriend Jimmy. his room-mate. STACEY And this is Wallace. STACEY Excuse my brother. hey! It’s tonight. FUN FACT: THIS PLACE IS A TOILET”. RAMONA Hey. 212 664-7665. He stands with Wallace and Stacey.INTEGRATED FINAL 37 CONTINUED: (2) 35.. Scott looks back up.(somehow) SCOTT Wait! Can I get your number? SSSSHHHOOP! Ramona skids to a stop. Ramona is already skating far. WALLACE (staring at Jimmy) Heyyy.

Scott scurries off.. Stacey stares at Scott. PROMOTER (O. BACKSTAGE .. Go. Scott’sScott goes white. SCOTT HEYYYYYYYY! KNIVES CHAU Hey. KIM Once we’re on stage you’ll be fine.. Knives looks kinda sexy. wake up. He looks up at Ramona and Knives sitting with Wallace. A KNIVES CHAU Do you like? .uh. The sound guy hated us. wake up. We hear feedback from a mic onstage. 39 B A F T LEONE STAREDOWNS all around.S) This next band are from Brampton and they are Crash And The Boys. He didn’t even see Knives come in. 39 INT. He pushes her away. STEPHEN STILLS This is a nightmare. SCOTT I. People love us. Jimmy and Stacey in the BALCONY. STILLS We were just on stage.CONTINUOUS Scott runs backstage to see Stills obsessively flipping through a chart with hand drawn stats of their rival band. For sound check. SCOTT It’s just nerves! Pre-show jitters. 38 STACEY And this is Knives. Wallace stares at Jimmy. SCOTT (CONT’D) Have.. Right? Scott sounds less than convincing.INTEGRATED FINAL 38 CONTINUED: 36. To. Is this a nightmare? Wake up. Knives pecks Scott on the cheek. THE ROCKIT. wearing makeup and new clothes. Knives and Ramona stare at each other.

04 seconds.. Wallace yells from the balcony. STAGE . THE ROCKIT. and it's called "We Hate You." And it goes a little something like this. Please Die. TOO? CRASH Yes.INTEGRATED FINAL 37. WALLACE Jimmy.haven't started playing yet. Kim glowers. KIM PINE They have a girl drummer? B41 INT. Do they rock or suck? JIMMY They.CONTINUOUS 40 Crash and The Boys tune up. A drunk Wallace turns to Jimmy. GUYS! CRASH This song is for the guy who keeps yelling from the balcony. CRASH Thank you. BACKSTAGE . . A41 INT. Jimmy. I am Crash. gives Wallace the finger. WALLACE That was a test.CONTINUOUS B41 A41 B Crash and the Boys play a whole song in . WALLACE IT'S NOT A RACE.. You passed. STAGE . THE ROCKIT." Sweet! WALLACE I love this one! A CRASH This is called "I am so sad. 40 INT. WALLACE IS THAT GIRL A BOY. 8 year old girl drummer. THE ROCKIT. and these are the Boys.CONTINUOUS Sex Bob-omb peer at the band from offstage. I am so very very sad. F T A (CONTINUED) CRASH Good evening. TRASHA.

B A F T A . B41 Crash continues his rampage of musical hate.INTEGRATED FINAL B41 CONTINUED: 37A.

STAGE .CONTINUOUS STEPHEN STILLS These guys are good. BACKSTAGE .CONTINUOUS Stills paces backstage as the others watch the band. He has so many friends. THE WILL YOU STOP JUST STANDING THERE. A F T A CRASH This is called "Last Song Kills Audience". 43 INT. THE ROCKIT. BALCONY . how do you know Scott? RAMONA He's. Stacey turns to Ramona. how did you meet Scott? B STACEY So. Stacey turns to Knives and Tamara. He's a friend. 41 INT... 41 STEPHEN STILLS 42 42 INT. YOU’RE FREAKING ME OUT! 43 44 INT. It'll be our last song tonight and your last song EVER. These guys are good.. STACEY So Knives.CONTINUOUS Sound explodes from the stage. STEPHEN STILLS How are we supposed to follow this? We’re not going to win. we’re not gonna sign with G-Man and we’ll never play opening night at the Chaos Theatre. 44 Ramona arches an eyebrow. STACEY Hard for me to keep track sometimes. BACKSTAGE . (freaking out) GODDAMN IT SCOTT.INTEGRATED FINAL 38. . THE ROCKIT. Are these guys good? Kim Pine scowls harder than ever.CONTINUOUS As Crash And The Boys climax. THE ROCKIT. The audience are stunned.

I was on the bus with my MomKnives freezes..INTEGRATED FINAL 39... FOUR! Sex Bob-omb rock out. staring at the stage.CONTINUOUS Stacey and Ramona listen intently to Knives’ story. 46 RAMONA Is that seriously the end of the story? 47 INT. THE ROCKIT.. PROMOTER This next band is from Toronto and. Scott nods vigorously. So give it up for Sex. they’re on! A 47 ONSTAGE: A DISHEVELED PROMOTER walks to the mic. finger pointed at Scott as he sails towards the stage! B A STEPHEN STILLS Scott.CONTINUOUS 45 Scott looks up into the balcony. THE reaKIM PINE WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB. ONE...CONTINUOUS T KNIVES CHAU OH MY GOSH. SCOTT We gotta play now and loud! 46 INT. STAGE .you ready? STEPHEN STILLS Kim. TWO. KNIVES CHAU Well.. KIM PINE (CONT’D) THREE. barely into the first verse when a chunk of ceiling CRASHES down and a SPINDLY INDIAN HIPSTER KID DIVES HEAD FIRST through the hole. BACKSTAGE . He turns around and slaps Stephen Stills in the face..Bob-Omb? SEX BOB-OMB walk on. THE ROCKIT. BALCONY . F (CONTINUED) . Wallace and Knives give the only cheers. ANGLE on Knives. 45 INT.. sees Stacey talking to Knives. She faints in the excitement.yeah..

Pilgrim. He wears an evil grin and a jacket that borders on flamboyant. knocking hipsters down and squaring off in the resulting circle. 47 MATTHEW PATEL lands onstage and glares at Scott through a lopsided fringe.. then PUNCHES him across the floor with his right. He drags on a cigarette (blacked out). Wallace! The LIGHTING GUY spotlights the fighters.INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: 40. Pilgrim. They land in THE PIT. Patel LANDS like a cat. B A Patel RUNS at Scott. FLIPS his fringe and GLARES at Scott. Scott SPIN KICKS Patel in the chin and sends him flying into the air. SCOTT Who the hell are you anyway? F WALLACE Watch out! It's that one guy! T Scott throws his bass to Young Neil and BLOCKS Patel with his left arm..begun! SCOTT What did I do? Matthew Patel leaps in the air and sails toward Scott. Consider our fight. MATTHEW PATEL My name is Matthew Patel and I'm Ramona's first evil ex-boyfriend! SCOTT You’re what? MATTHEW PATEL Ramona’s first evil ex-boyfriend! All eyes WHIP up to Ramona.. MATTHEW PATEL Mr. It is I. MATTHEW PATEL You’re quite the opponent.. WALLACE FIGHT! MATTHEW PATEL Alright. SCOTT Thank you. A (CONTINUED) SCOTT What do I do?! . Alright. Matthew Patel.

47 RAMONA Anyone need another drink? Patel attacks Scott with spin kicks. Scott blocks. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . Patel punches. then holds his hand up for a time-out. Scott blocks.INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: (2) 40A.

Scott evades and counter-attacks. Scott looks up to Ramona. Nothing but pre-teen capriciousness. landing kicks and punches. They exchange furious blows. then lands more punches. Patel evades. all the little jocks wanted me. . SCOTT Are you a pirate? MATTHEW PATEL Pirates are in this year! Patel attacks again. breathing heavy. We were one hell of a team. RAMONA (CONT'D) It was football season and for some reason. in the seventh grade. non-jock boy in school. Matthew was the only non-white. Scott jump-spins away from danger. The Lighting Guy SWINGS the spotlight to Ramona in the balcony. B A SCOTT You really went out with this guy? RAMONA Yeah. I told him to hit the showers. Nothing could beat Matthew's mystical powers. probably in the entire state.INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: (3) 41. We see a sketchy childlike ANIMATED FLASHBACK. They pause. We only kissed once. until Patel puts Scott in a choke hold. F T (CONTINUED) A Patel attacks. MATTHEW PATEL You will pay for your insolence! WALLACE What’s up with his outfit? OTHER HECKLER Yeah! Is he a pirate? Scott looks at Patel’s outfit. so we joined forces and took 'em all out. 47 SCOTT We're fighting because of Ramona? MATTHEW PATEL Didn't you get my e-mail explaining the situation? SCOTT I skimmed it. After a week and a half.

INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: (4) 41A. 47 The spotlight swings back onto Scott and Patel. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: (5) 42. how can it be?! Scott leaps into the air. They explode Crash and the Boys in the wings. T A (CONTINUED) . B A MATTHEW PATEL (CONT’D) Let us show him what we’re all about. wait. The Demon Hipster Chicks unleash more fireballs. Patel levitates into the air. He flips back onto the stage.. Maybe you’ll see. F MATTHEW PATEL (CONT’D) Fireball Girls! Take this sucker down. MATTHEW PATEL (CONT’D) Me and my fireballs and my Demon Hipster Chicks. Four hot girls in skirts with fangs and bat-wings appear in the air around him. you’re not the brightest. I’m talking the talk because I know I’m slick. It hits Patel square in the eyes. narrowly dodging the attack. POOF. Flowers! Patel SNAPS his fingers and launches into a BOLLYWOOD SONG! MATTHEW PATEL (CONT'D) If you want to fight me. Scott rolls across the stage. the Demon Hipster Chicks vanish. GRABS one of Kim’s CYMBALS and throws it Captain America style. SCOTT That doesn’t even rhyme. SCOTT Open your eyes. dodging a third wave of fireballs. Patel and the Demon Hipster Chicks shoot FIREBALLS at Scott. MATTHEW PATEL You’ll pay for this. You won’t know what’s hit you in the slightest. Scott hits the ground. MATTHEW PATEL This is impossible.. Scott dodges.mystical powers? Patel levitates into the air and points at Ramona. 47 SCOTT Dude. Patel opens his eyes just in time to see Scott Pilgrim’s FIST racing towards his face. The house drum kit is trashed behind him.

Coins.CONTINUOUS Ramona makes her way out fast. Scott lands and picks them up.INTEGRATED FINAL 47 CONTINUED: (6) 42A. Passes Stacey. SCOTT Sweet. 48 B A (CONTINUED) F T A . They clatter to the stage floor. 47 K.O! Scott punches Patel. 48 INT. BALCONY . He explodes into COINS. THE ROCKIT.

. Scott picks up the coins onstage and counts them.. SCOTT You have seven evil ex-boyfriends? B F T A 49 INT.CONTINUOUS 49 (CONTINUED) . Sex Bob-Omb wins. STACEY Gay friends? Stacey turns to see Wallace and Jimmy making out. Tell your gay friends I said bye. STAGE .. Her eyes scan the venue for Scott. BALCONY . $2. you may have to defeat my seven evil ex's. 48 RAMONA Well.. SCOTT What was all that all about? RAMONA Uh.CONTINUOUS 50 51 INT. THE ROCKIT. SCOTT Aw man.40? That's not even enough for the bus home.. I guess. PROMOTER Yeah. 51 SCOTT Sooooooo. who is being resuscitated by Tamara. Ramona yanks Scott away. 50 INT. STACEY WALLACE?! Not again! Ramona passes Knives.NIGHT A Knives is now wide awake. A bemused Scott and mortified Ramona sit on the bus home.. THE BUS .but he is long gone. THE ROCKIT. RAMONA I'll lend you the 30 cents. The Promotor ambles back onstage. Ramona takes a breath. Looks deep into Scott’s eyes. clapping wildly from the balcony..INTEGRATED FINAL 48 CONTINUED: like. RAMONA (CONT’D) If we're going to date. it was great meeting you..

WALLACE Someone’s lucky then. I guess. what you're saying is. B WALLACE Someone’s happy.INTEGRATED FINAL 51 CONTINUED: 44. SCOTT You know when I say ‘someone’... SCOTT So I have to fightRAMONA Defeat. SCOTT Cool. 52 53 OMITTED INT.maybe first and a half. A bleary Wallace fries bacon.. someone got to second base last night. . SCOTT So. I mean me. SCOTT -defeat your seven evil ex's if we're going to continue to date. The studio audience applauds. And someone has a second date tonight. Scott bursts through the front door.MORNING 52 A F RAMONA T A 53 (CONTINUED) RAMONA Pretty much. SCOTT Well. Wallace shoots a look at the idiotically upbeat Scott. yes. a spring in his step. The studio audience 'awwww's. 51 RAMONA Seven ex's. (beat) We are dating? RAMONA Uh. right? I got to second base last night. Scott kisses Ramona.. Do you want to make out? Uh. WALLACE'S APARTMENT ...

. WALLACE Okay. I don't want you gaying up the place. Scott. I'm inviting Ramona over for're. SCOTT You’re a monster. Today.. T A . At this point a sleepy JIMMY wanders out of the bathroom and helps himself to coffee... so you can't be here tonight. (CONTINUED) B A Morning. JIMMY Scott points bacon at Wallace accusingly. take it up with Liberace’s Ghost. I'm going to tell Ramona about Knives. If you have a problem with it. SCOTT Who’s Lucas Lee? Wallace points to a hunky actor on the cover of NOW magazine... hey. WALLACE If you don't do it.INTEGRATED FINAL 53 CONTINUED: 45.. I swear to God. SCOTT One of your famous ultimatums? WALLACE It may live in infamy.... But in return I have to issue an ultimatum.'s HARD. F SCOTT But you. SCOTT (CONT’D) DOUBLE STANDARD! WALLACE I didn’t make up the gay rulebook.but. Okay? Scott huffs and helps himself to some of Wallace's bacon. WALLACE Now put the bacon down and go do your dirt while I watch the Lucas Lee marathon on TBS Superstation. SCOTT But.You have to break up with Knives. 53 SCOTT (CONT’D) Oh.

(MORE) B A (CONTINUED) F T A . 53 WALLACE He was this pretty good skater and now he’s this pretty good actor.INTEGRATED FINAL 53 CONTINUED: (2) 45A.

.is me pulling the trigger.DAY A shivering and annoyed Scott dials the payphone.) Are you wearing a tan jacket? Like a spring jacket? And a hoodie? . Hi. SCOTT So. F SCOTT T Scott grumbles off.S. hey. I am stalking him later. do you want to. Uh. B A Ummm..S. talk or whatever? KNIVES CHAU (O. like. The next click is me hanging up.) And a dorky hat?! SCOTT It's not dorky! Why are you psychic? A beaming Knives knocks on the payphone glass. Um. SCOTT (CONT'D) Oh. A 54 Scott checks what he's wearing. SCOTT Oh. 53 SCOTT They make movies in Toronto? WALLACE Yes. LUCAS LEE (ON TV) Listen close and listen hard. Knives. bucko... 54 EXT.INTEGRATED FINAL 53 CONTINUED: (3) WALLACE (cont'd) He’s filming a Winifred Hailey movie in Toronto right now. Surprising no one. PAYPHONE ON BUSY STREET . We see Lucas Lee on a payphone in some crummy thriller.. The one after that. this Lucas LeeWALLACE Lucas Lee is not important to you right now! Get out. SPOOKY MUSIC underscores. Wallace turns the television way up. SCOTT You suck. 46. KNIVES CHAU (O..okay.

DAY The SPOOKY MUSIC continues on in the record store. really. It’s not my favorite. KNIVES CHAU KNIVES CHAU Yeah. it's okay.. Why? SCOTT Well I mean. B A SCOTT Uh. I wanted to invite you over for dinner. to meet my parents.are you even allowed to date outside your race or whatever? KNIVES CHAU I don't care. 55 Scott is on edge as Knives geeks over a standee for THE CLASH AT DEMONHEAD: it features sultry blonde singer ENVY ADAMS posing and the rest of the band shrouded in shadow and mist. 55 INT.. KNIVES CHAU I can’t believe they’re coming to town.. I'm too old for you! KNIVES CHAU No you're not! My Dad is nine years older than my Mom.I think that's a really bad idea. Will you take me to the show? SCOTT Yeah.LOVE! F SCOTT Hmm. KNIVES CHAU No... SCOTT Like.. SCOTT And. Well.. pounding inside Scott's head.. KNIVES CHAU Oh. It's my birthday dinner. Like. just so bad. listenThe SPOOKY MUSIC gets louder. I'm in. T (CONTINUED) A .INTEGRATED FINAL 47. Chinese food? Yeah.and.. SONIC BOOM .. hey.

The SPOOKY MUSIC comes to a stop.INTEGRATED FINAL 55 CONTINUED: 47A. listen. the word actually appears onscreen.. Scott brushes it away. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .I was thinking we should break up or whatever.. SCOTT Um. 55 Knives is so smitten.

CROSSCUT with Knives still in the record store. I learned the bass line from Final Fantasy 2. 56 57 INT/EXT. CROSSCUT with Ramona: rollerblading.. SCOTT Aw. T ON THE BUS: Scott smiles. thinking about Knives. Kim and Stills share a look. SCOTT (CONT'D) OH! Check it ON THE BUS: Scott sighs. SCOTT Aw.. a little happier. Scott plays the insanely simple video game tune. 57 SCOTT Oh. 55 KNIVES CHAU SCOTT Yeah. YOUNG NEIL You.. B A Young Neil PAUSES his's not going to work out. thinks of something happier. KIM PINE Scott.DAY Scott sits on the bus alone. thanks... her funky pink hair.EVENING Sex Bob-Omb tune up. I meant scum of the earth. No. thanks. KNIVES CHAU Scott walks out. STEPHEN STILLS’ BASEMENT .. We broke up. KIM PINE Wait. you are the salt of the earth. in shock. Kim spins a drumstick in her fingers. 56 INT. Oh. THE BUS / RECORD STORE .you broke up with Knives? F KIM PINE Where's Knives? Not coming tonight? A (CONTINUED) . leaving Knives in the aisle.INTEGRATED FINAL 55 CONTINUED: (2) Really? 48..

. SCOTT You know your hair? RAMONA I know of it. that’s. no GIRLFRIENDS or GIRLFRIEND talk at practice.. I just dyed it. Kim.. SCOTT (CONT'D) That's for me. RAMONA Yes. This is sudden death now. maybe you'll meet my new new girlfriend soon. Young Neil. RAMONA Hey everyone.. Scott opens the door to see Ramona.. but don’t worry. STEPHEN STILLS Okay! From here on out.. YOUNG NEIL Newnew. Scott still stares at Ramona’s’re here? T A (CONTINUED) . Like you said. this is Stephen Stills. Is it not cool? Everyone mumbles back. SCOTT It’s all blue. now sporting BLUE HAIR. 57 SCOTT Yeah. B A Scott ushers her in. We were lucky to survive that last round.INTEGRATED FINAL 57 CONTINUED: 49. Stills unplugs Scott’s amp. Okay? SCOTT Okay! DINGY DONG. new or new-new. weirded out by this hair development. Kim mimes shooting herself. Are you going to introduce me? SCOTT Oh yeah. whether they’re old. RAMONA Yeah. F SCOTT (CONT’D) Hey.

57 SCOTT Is it weird not being pink anymore? B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 57 CONTINUED: (2) 49A.

YOUNG NEIL (to Stills) I’m Neil. I guess? STEPHEN STILLS What Neil said.. SCOTT Okay. SCOTT She changed her hair. He’s an idiot. F T RAMONA Got any embarassing stories? A (CONTINUED) I’m Neil. Scott fake laughs.INTEGRATED FINAL 57 CONTINUED: (3) 50. WALLACE'S APARTMENT .uh.. WALLACE Are you doing okay there? SCOTT Yeah. See you guys tomorrow. YOUNG NEIL . 58 Ramona lounges. Starts ushering Ramona out again. Cool. 57 RAMONA I change my hair every week and a half. KIM PINE Yeah. I actually dated Scott in high school. dude. do you guys all know each other? YOUNG NEIL High school. Scott drops the act. what about rehearsal? 58 INT. (to Sex Bob-Omb) So. Get used to it.. KIM PINE Believe it or not. reading a magazine.. preparing food as Wallace looks on. good. Ramona goes to the bathroom. A tense Scott hurries around the kitchen area.NIGHT B A SCOTT Neil knows my parts. STEPHEN STILLS Uh.


Scott has cooked garlic bread (and only garlic bread) for dinner. A (CONTINUED) . RAMONA This is actually really good garlic bread. good. Good. 58 SCOTT I know. picnic style.INTEGRATED FINAL 58 CONTINUED: (2) 51. Oh my god. “when”. SCOTT “If I strike out”? WALLACE Okay. but she changed it without even making a big deal about it. come find me at the Castle. Impulsive. Wallace pulls on a jacket. WALLACE Will you man the hell up? You could get to 2nd and a half base. RAMONA How’s dinner coming along? SCOTT Yeah. with a panicked whisper. A SCOTT You think so? WALLACE Well. what do I do? WALLACE I can’t believe you were worried about me gaying up the place. if you strike out in the next hour. See you in sixty. SCOTT Don’t go. Fickle. B Ramona and Scott eat on the floor. Scott stops Wallace at the door. '15 MINUTES LATER' F T WALLACE I’ll leave you lovebirds to it. I’m heading up to Casa Loma to stalk my hetero crush. Ramona returns. She’s spontaneous.

SCOTT '15 MINUTES LATER' F T A nervy Scott serenades Ramona on his bass guitar. it goes like this: Ra-mona. Ra-ra-ra. RAMONA You'd get fat. 58 SCOTT Garlic bread is my favorite food. Ramona is taken aback. RAMONA What? A Finished? RAMONA I can’t wait to hear it when it’s finished. A (CONTINUED) . RAMONA Your hair's pretty shaggy.INTEGRATED FINAL 58 CONTINUED: (3) 52. Ooooh. RAMONA Oh yeah? SCOTT Yeah. Why would I get fat? RAMONA Bread makes you fat. Ra-ra-ra. Scott smiles as she runs her hands through his hair. I could honestly eat it for every meal. Or just all the time without even stopping. Mona. SCOTT Bread makes you FAT?? '15 MINUTES LATER' SCOTT So I wrote a song about you. Ra-mona. Mona. Ra-mona. SCOTT OH GOD! I NEED A HAIRCUT DON'T I?!? Scott sits up like a shot. Ra-mona. SCOTT No. B Scott makes out with Ramona on the futon.

hair tucked tightly beneath the flaps. Scott disappears and just as quickly reappears. Earl Jones deep. He blames this largely on the haircut and has been cutting his own hair ever since. 58 SCOTT Ha.. NARRATOR She dumped him. It was brutal.. now wearing his dorky SNOW HAT.INTEGRATED FINAL 58 CONTINUED: (4) 53. No. I like it long... Then. she told me it was mutual. It’s just that I got... It was. NARRATOR It wasn’t.. I can barely remember it. sorry. RAMONA What? Why are you wearing that? (CONTINUED) B A SCOTT I mean. three hours before his big breakup. I got a bad haircut right before me and my big ex broke up. T A . But it’s so long ago.she stopped liking me.. SCOTT Not really. RAMONA What was her name? SCOTT She was Nat when I knew her. RAMONA Your hair is cute. A deep voiced NARRATOR chimes in. NARRATOR Scott is acutely aware that his last salon haircut took place exactly 431 days ago. RAMONA Sounds like a bad time. SCOTT But it'd be cuter short! Wouldn't it?! F NARRATOR SCOTT It was a mutual thing. But she stopped liking that name..

heightened. but.. RAMONA Who's in it? SCOTT Winifred Hailey and some actor guy. I just love me some walking. Not that I do drugs. F SCOTT Yeah. as if crossing a magical make me feel. who? SCOTT I forget.. . Putting one leg in front of the other. ENDLESS STAIRWAY .. They’re shooting this movie up here. T A SCOTT Nooo. when I'm with you I feel like I'm on drugs. 59 RAMONA You seem a little. RAMONA Tell me we didn't come out here just so you could cover your hair with that hat. Things seem a little brighter around you or something. in which case I do drugs all the time. a castle surrounded by big.I don't know. every drug. I don’t know. I just. Let’s find out. B Ramona looks up at the looming CASA LOMA.. RAMONA Oh. 59 EXT. unless you do. Ramona and Scott finally reach the top of the stairs and NIGHT TURNS TO DAY.NIGHT '15 MINUTES LATER' Scott and Ramona climb a STAIRWAY. long handrail between them. A RAMONA What is this place? SCOTT A totally awesome castle.INTEGRATED FINAL 58 CONTINUED: (5) 54.. bright movie set lights. 58 SCOTT I thought we could go for a walk..

CONTINUOUS 60 A crew readies a shot of WINIFRED HAILEY held hostage by some GOON. I am not a slut. T (CONTINUED) A . CASA LOMA . The spectators go “oooh”. We gotta go. including Wallace. Lee is travelling! RAMONA Mr. He skates towards the set. doing kickflips. Scott and Ramona approach some SPECTATORS. Ooh? SCOTT WALLACE I want to have his adopted babies. WALLACE RAMONA Wallace. RAMONA Did you find the guy you’re stalking? WALLACE I think I’m about to right now. Lee? WALLACE Lucas Lee. RAMONA Ooh. Mr. F The UNIVERSAL STUDIOS FANFARE announces LUCAS LEE as he exits his trailer.INTEGRATED FINAL 55. 60 EXT. smoking a cigarette (blacked out). A STAND IN takes the place of the leading man.D. SCOTT RAMONA I used to date that clown. FIRST A. man. RAMONA Oh. B A What? Why? Slut.

We had drama. SCOTT He's famous and he talked to me! B A F HEY!!! T A (CONTINUED) LUCAS LEE Hey. SCOTT He had snot? In his nose? But he's famous! LUCAS LEE HEY!!! RAMONA It’s not a big deal.. LUCAS LEE Lucas Lee points at Scott. LUCAS LEE Action. it might have been math. SCOTT Oh. .. He was a little snot nosed brat. Lucas Lee points his board at the GOON. who remains oblivious.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: 60 WALLACE I can think of no higher accolade. Actually.. RAMONA He just followed me dated a FAMOUS guy?! RAMONA In 9th grade.. Lucas steps to his mark and puffs up into action hero mode.. The only thing keeping me and her apart is the two minutes it’s gonna take to kick your ass. I only dated him for a week and a halfLUCAS LEE I'm talking to you Scott Pilgrim! Lucas Lee stomps towards Scott. SCOTT . who gasps.God.. I just remember there being lots of drama..

SCOTT Can I get your autograph? LUCAS LEE Sup. WALLACE Scott.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (2) 56A. Scotts CRASHES down through scaffolding onto the set. Lucas holds up his hands for a quick continuity photo. then stomps over to pick up a dazed Scott from the ground. He nods to Ramona. A POW! Lucas Lee PUNCHES Scott again. B A (CONTINUED) F T Lucas Lee THROWS Scott up into a castle turret. Evil ex. How’s life? He seems nice. Scott comes back up with a pen and paper. 60 LUCAS LEE The only thing keeping me and her apart is the two minutes it's gonna take to kick your ass! SCOTT Can I getPOW! Lucas Lee punches Scott. . flooring him. Fight. crumbling it. wobbly.

only to find an identical STAND IN! LUCAS LEE (O. smirking on the sidelines. bro? Lucas Lee PUNCHES Scott again. all identically dressed. COUNTLESS STUNTMEN fan out behind the STAND IN.S. LUCAS LEE I’m gonna get coffee. hey! I’m not doneScott spins Lucas around. Tae Kwon Doe style. Suddenly. A SET NURSE sprays Lucas’ knuckles with antiseptic. LUCAS LEE He’s good. F T Scott turns to see the real Lucas. POW! The identical Stand In punches Scott to the ground.. LUCAS LEE Some competish you are.) Looks like you’re seeing double. You homies want anything? We follow the smirking Lucas to the coffee station. He slides across the wet-down ground. Scott PUNCHES through a couple of the boards.. Lucas Lee wanders off. hey. SCOTT (O.. followed by a barrage of crippling skateboard blows to his knees and ribs. Scott staggers to his feet. Lee? (CONTINUED) B A LUCAS LEE I’m nothing without my stunt team. Scott stands to fight the double. WALLACE Ask them how it feels to always get his sloppy seconds! SCOTT How does it feel to- KROW! Scott takes a skateboard to the face.S. A . The Stuntmen ATTACK Scott Pilgrim with a howl.) Mr. SCOTT Hey. all carrying skateboards and ready to rumble. punchy. 60 LUCAS LEE Think you stand a chance against an A-lister.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (3) 57. right? Sometimes I let him do wide shots if I feel like getting blazed back in my winnie.. We hear the noise of punching and kicking slowly subside to nothing.

. 60 Lucas turns.. LUCAS LEE I'm going for the Oscar this year.. SCOTT You’re needed back on set. RRRIP! Scott lands in a CRUMP. Scott smiles through his aching jaw. framed through the torn skyline. POW! Lucas gets him square in the mouth. . in front of a PAINTED 2-D SKYLINE BACKDROP. SCOTT You are a pretty good actor. Lucas stomps over to him.. Lucas offers a hand. SCOTT But are you a pretty good skater? B A Really? LUCAS LEE Oh.. F SCOTT LUCAS LEE Seven evil exes? Coming to kill you? Controlling the future of Ramona's love life? T LUCAS LEE You really don't know about the "The League"? A (CONTINUED) . prepare to feel the wrath of the League of Evil Exes! SCOTT The League of Evil Axes? SCOTT Ummm. LUCAS LEE Prepare. well then don't worry about it. preparing for the deathblow. SCOTT LUCAS LEE Yeah. surrounded by many unconscious stuntmen. bro. Scott goes to shake Let’s get a beer.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (4) 58. Lucas GRABS his foot and hurls him through the backdrop. shocked to see Scott.. Scott CHARGES Lucas Lee and leaps into a FLYING KICK.

Wallace taps Lucas' shoulder and hands him his skateboard. F T A (CONTINUED) ... SCOTT Hey. SCOTT So can you do a grind thingy now? LUCAS LEE Are you serious? There’s like 200 steps and the rails are garbage. HSSSSSSSSS.. SCOTT Wow. LUCAS LEE It’s called a grind. if it’s too hardcore.HSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.. but can you do a thingy on that rail? Scott points to the LONG HANDRAIL on the stairs. I have my own skate company. WALLACE Hi. ese. revealing a skate company tattoo.. LUCAS LEE Why wouldn’t you be? CLACK! Lucas GOES FOR IT. Lucas pulls down his shirt. LUCAS LEE You really think you can goad me into doing a trick like that? SCOTT There’s girls watching. Cut back to Scott & Wallace. 60 LUCAS LEE I’m more than pretty good. a perfect ollie onto the rail. Scott and Wallace watch as Lucas disappears from sight.. sparking down the ENDLESS RAIL.. Big fan. SCOTT So you can sell them.. impressed at Lucas.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (5) 59. Cut back to Scott & Wallace. bro. very impressed at Lucas. B A LUCAS LEE Somebody get me my board.

60 SCOTT Wow.. Scott’s about to say ‘wow’ whenBOOOOOOOOM! A fireball appears from the bottom of the stairs.. SCOTT I didn’t get his autograph. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . SCOTT Yes! Fist bump. he totally bailed. Cut back to Scott & Wallace. Scott smacks his forehead. WALLACE Wow.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (6) 59A. HSSSSSSSSS.

WALLACE'S APARTMENT . you can’t say you didn’t see this coming. 212 664-7665.D. 60 FIRST A. Scott Pilgrim. Uh. T SCOTT Hey. SCOTT What's the deal? Seriously. Wallace cooks bacon in the kitchen (no pants). (hangs up) What's the deal? Seriously. . you said that last night. A Scott slumps on the couch. F WALLACE WALLACE Yeah. (CONTINUED) B A What? SCOTT Everything! WALLACE Come on guy. It’s me. she totally bailed.. Scott again. RAMONA is not available.INTEGRATED FINAL 60 CONTINUED: (7) 60. SCOTT You know what really sucks though? Wallace points to the NOTE Ramona scribbled which is pinned literally under Scott's nose on the refrigerator: RAMONA FLOWERS. Call me back. xxxxxxx WALLACE What did you think these were? SCOTT Kisses? Seven little kisses? WALLACE Seven deadly X's. We hear the OUTGOING MESSAGE: This is an automated voice messaging system.that’s a wrap everybody. phone pressed to his ear. 61 INT. please record your message after the beep.DAY 61 Scott ambles over to the fridge and rests his head on it. SCOTT Where's Ramona? Is she still here? WALLACE No.. It was right under your nose.

B A F T A (CONTINUED) Lesbian? . Look. You have to overcome any and all obstacles that lie in your path. You have the spirit of a warrior. SCOTT What? Why? Are you moving in with Other Scott or Jimmy or someone? WALLACE Or someone. Scott picks up. completely shocked at this bombshell. You can do it! Be with her! It’s your destiny! (beat) Plus. NON-RAMONA VOICE REPLIES. Either way. Step up your game. I wasn’t trying to trick you or anything. WALLACE I have a feeling that’s for you.. I’m kind of banking on her calling you back so I won’t have to evict you and feel all guilty and shit. 61 Wallace cocks an eyebrow. Lesbians? Scott’s face falls. Scott slides to the floor.INTEGRATED FINAL 61 CONTINUED: 61. Scott. SCOTT WALLACE Okay. Break out the L-word. VOICE (O. it’s “love”.) Hey Scott. I need you to move out. WALLACE If you want something bad. SCOTT Why does everything have to be so complicated? Wallace crouches down to join Scott on the floor. A SEXY. you have to fight for it. SCOTT WALLACE The other L-word. RINGY RING. if she’s really the girl of your dreams. Scott and Wallace look at the phone.. then you have to let her know.S. guy.


62. 61

SCOTT ...Envy? WALLACE Oh, shit. ENVY (O.S.) It’s been a long time. SCOTT Yeah. ENVY (O.S.) A year I think? SCOTT Approximately. ENVY (O.S.) How are you?

SCOTT I’m not doing so good right now. ENVY (O.S.) That’s too bad. Still breaking hearts?


Uh. No.

ENVY (O.S.) Probably not. Do you have a girlfriend? Should I be jealous? SCOTT Yes, you should. I have this totally awesome girlfriend who calls me all the time. And she’s America. Uh. She’s American. ENVY (O.S.) What’s her name? SCOTT I’m not telling you that. Ramona. ENVY (O.S.) SCOTT What? Do you know her? ENVY (O.S.)


SCOTT What? No, stop. I’ve been-it’s been different. You have no idea.




63. 61

SCOTT It sounded like you did. ENVY (O.S.) I gotta go. Nice chatting with you. SCOTT WaitCLICK...Scott slumps to the floor. Wallace appears over him. WALLACE Okay. Everything does suck.

WALLACE Or does it?

Scott sits bolt upright, expectant. WALLACE Oh, hey Knives. Scott lays back down. FUCK.

Scott sits bolt upright again. FUCK! Wallace opens the door a crack. Knives shivers outside, pale and broken looking.

Knives sighs. Scott sprints away in the background. A62 EXT. STREET - DAY A62

Scott walks fast down the street, freaked out and paranoid. He sees five ‘X’s looming above him on a pedestrian crossing and quickly diverts into an... 62 EXT. ALLEY - DAY Scott rips the ‘X-Men’ patch off his jacket, when62


Behind Wallace, we see Scott LEAP through a window head first. GLASS SMASHES. WALLACE (CONT’D) He just left.


KNIVES CHAU Is Scott here? WALLACE You know what?


WALLACE What’s that? You’re outside?



Scott grunts. RINGY RING. Wallace grins and grabs the phone.


63A. 62

WHZZZ - SOMETHING buzzes past Scott. He looks around. SCOTT Dude. WHOOSH - another blast of air whizzes by. SCOTT Please.






Hits SOMETHING. F MYSTERY ATTACKER (dixieland accent) Love to postpone. SHWAA . am I asleep right now? MYSTERY ATTACKER SCOTT So. ALT #1: SCOTT What’s that from? ALT #2: B No. technically this is not a nightmare. Can we not do this right now? A (CONTINUED) MYSTERY ATTACKER You punched me in the boob.INTEGRATED FINAL 62 CONTINUED: (2) 64. 62 SHFFF . enough! Scott punches the air in front of him. darlin’. SCOTT I’m really not in the mood. SCOTT Wait. I’ve had it today. Prepare to die. but I just cashed my last raincheck. SCOTT Okay. obviously. She spins to face Scott.SOMETHING sweeps him off his feet.SOMETHING slices the air in front of Scott. This is one nightmare you can’t wake up from. A MYSTERY ATTACKER (own voice) My brain! SCOTT Well whatever this is about. A DIMINUTIVE DIRTY BLONDE dressed in a punk rock kung fu get up lands on the ground with a thump. He’s pissed now. . can it wait till I’m in the right frame of mind? MYSTERY ATTACKER Nuh uh. T SCOTT Listen.

SCOTT Well. (MORE) B A 63 EXT. MYSTERY ATTACKER Okay little chicken. It’s actually me.DAY F T 63 (CONTINUED) A . Someone help me. dialing Stacey frantically. But you won’t see me. SCOTT So how can I not wake up? If I’m not actually asleep. BLOOR STREET .) What did he do this time? SCOTT No. It’s everyone else that’s crazy. SCOTT What? Nevermind! MYSTERY ATTACKER PAF . STACEY (O. 62 MYSTERY ATTACKER Right. Whatever it is. Scott is in his usual payphone.S. SCOTT It’s Scott. baffled. SCOTT Oh man.S.INTEGRATED FINAL 62 CONTINUED: (3) 64A. Because I’ll be deadly serious next time.) What did you do this time? SCOTT I didn’t do anything. really not up for this. Scott looks to the sky. then I’ll see you later. I’m really. it’s Scott. MYSTERY ATTACKER Don’t question me! Scott shakes his head.the Mystery Attacker vanishes. STACEY (O.

mouthing that she has to go. I can't believe you fucking asked Ramona out after I specifically told you not to fucking do that! F T A Scott approaches the counter. (CONTINUED) . SCOTT Cool. a black bar comes out of her mouth and the sound is bleeped. Stacey turns around.INTEGRATED FINAL 63 CONTINUED: SCOTT (cont'd) Look I need to talk to you. something a fuckball like you wouldn't know anything about.S. Stacey has her back turned. Are you still working? 65. THE SECOND CUP . And by the way. Can I get a caramel macchiato? B A SCOTT Is there anywhere you don’t work? JULIE They’re called 'jobs'. revealing herself to be JULIE! JULIE SCOTT PILGRIM! SCOTT AH! What did you do with my sister? Stacey taps on the window outside. JULIE What can I fucking get you? (Note to concerned reader: Everytime Julie says "FUCK".) SCOTT How do you do that with your mouth? JULIE Neverfuckingmind how I do it! What do you have to say for yourself? SCOTT Uh.CONTINUOUS 64 SCOTT Think I’ll make it a decaf today. I’m having a meltdown or whatever. Scott turns back to Julie. I’m coming in. Scott hangs up the phone and walks two steps into64 INT. not happy. 63 STACEY (O.) I’m literally about to leave.

I’ll understand if you don’t want to hang anymore. SCOTT So I can pick up my coffee over here? RAMONA. They share an awkward moment. RAMONA Yeah.. 23. B Scott hides behind Ramona as a lithe figure emerges from the steamed-milk mists of the coffee shop. RAMONA Sorry that got a little crazy last night. The whole evil ex-boyfriend thing.the singer from THE CLASH AT DEMONHEAD has seemingly stepped out of the poster.. FUN FACT: KICKED SCOTT'S HEART IN THE ASS. A . I know it's early days. "ENVY ADAMS. SCOTT Yeah. I do that. platinum blonde fashionista walks towards Scott. I hear the girl that kicked your heart in the ass is walking the streets of Toronto again. No.. She looks at the floor. SCOTT Me? Wreak havoc? Julie points at THE CLASH AT DEMONHEAD poster behind the counter with concert dates at the bottom. Listen. I want to hang. RAMONA SCOTT I mean. You kind of disappeared. SCOTT No.INTEGRATED FINAL 64 CONTINUED: 66." The icy. 64 JULIE Maybe it’s high fucking time you took a look in a mirror before you wreak havoc on another girl. No biggie. but I don’t think anything can really get in the way of how I SHIT! F T Scott retreats away from Julie and bumps right into.. (CONTINUED) A Exes. JULIE Fucking speaking of fucking which. I know it’s hard to be around me sometimes.

SCOTT Yeah? ENVY So. F (CONTINUED) T A ENVY Your hair is getting shaggy. I know. 64 SCOTT (CONT'D) It's my ex. RAMONA The big one? Scott nods. ENVY Great. I’m jealous. Ramona goes to order coffee. LEONE STAREDOWN between Envy and Ramona. ENVY Okay. leaving Envy to fix on Scott.excuse me.INTEGRATED FINAL 64 CONTINUED: (2) 67. You left me for a guy I’ve never even seen.. You’re so on the list. . SCOTT YOU’RE jealous? B A ENVY I’m allowed. RAMONA I’m gonna. We’re playing Lee’s Palace. SCOTT Yeah. so totally come. SCOTT That’s so not going to happen. That’s Ramona? SCOTT Yeah. REVERSE: Scott is instantly wearing his DORKY HAT. SCOTT You left me! For that cocky pretty boy! ENVY You’ve never even seen him. You guys should like. ENVY Maybe you’ll see him soon..

RAMONA And two weeks later. 65 SCOTT No. RAMONA What happened with the two of you? B A Basically.that was Nat? .DAY Scott and Ramona walk side by side.. How. SCOTT I can see how it sucks. Ramona returns.INTEGRATED FINAL 64 CONTINUED: (3) 68.. About.. F T RAMONA So. 64 Envy disappears into the cappucino mists. you heard they were sleeping together I guess? SCOTT RAMONA I dated a Todd once.. 65 EXT. JULIE Caramel Fuckiato for fuck Pilgrim! SCOTT (to Ramona) It’s pronounced “Scott”. SCOTT Do you mind if we don’t get into that right now? (beat) She wanted to move to Montreal because she missed her best friend. That. TORONTO RESIDENTIAL STREET . That didn’t end well either. SCOTT She’s totally jealous of you. sipping their coffees.what did you guys talk about? A (CONTINUED) RAMONA So. that was Envy. This guy Todd. RAMONA Envy’s jealous? How about that? SCOTT Yeah. Having the past come back to haunt you.

65 RAMONA Is it wrong that I try not to think about it? B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 65 CONTINUED: 68A.

. 65 SCOTT What do you want to think about? RAMONA How warm my place is right now. A deadly serious Stephen Stills addresses Kim. Just because Envy's back in town doesn't make it not over. SCOTT Double negative. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . I will think of Envy Adams no more! 67 67 INT. Ramona lounges on the couch.. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE .NIGHT Scott lies between Wallace and Other Scott on the futon.INTEGRATED FINAL 65 CONTINUED: (2) 69. F WALLACE JIMMY T A (CONTINUED) . Ramona stops and kisses him. From this moment on. Mm. I’m not gonna let her toy with me. A bleary Jimmy sits up between them all. Move on. B A Word. 66 Scott stands (no pants). Music swells. 66 INT. Scott and Young Neil.DAY STEPHEN STILLS I have distressing news. JIMMY Is that the Uma Thurman movie? WALLACE Scott. OTHER SCOTT It’s over. OTHER SCOTT And you didn't bang her? Are you gay? SCOTT I couldn't stop thinking about my stupid ex-girlfriend. SCOTT Right. Tricky.

INTEGRATED FINAL 67 CONTINUED: 69A. STEPHEN STILLS No. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . And Envy asked us to open for them. 67 KIM PINE Is the news that we suck? Because I really don’t think I can take it. The Clash At Demonhead are doing a secret show tomorrow night.

We need groundswell. We need to get some buzz going. SCOTT Yeah.INTEGRATED FINAL 67 CONTINUED: (2) 70.. we’re all adults right? 68 KNIVES frantically rifles through racks of hair dye and rants furiously into her cellphone.KNIVES CHAU OUTSIDE. A KIM PINE All our shows are secret shows.EVENING B A Yeah. for the band? For the band. G-man might be there! We play the next round of the battle Saturday. KNIVES CHAU He's dating a fat-ass hipster chick! I hate his stupid guts! I'm gonna disembowel him! F T STEPHEN STILLS We’re doing it. CRASH ZOOM on her tearful face. . SCOTT What would you do? If your ex was in a band and they wanted you to open for them? 68 INT. We need stalkers. DRUG SMART . Is a gig. You know. 67 SCOTT I hate you. Maybe you can put your history aside until we get through this thing. For the band? SCOTT Can’t we do our own secret shows? Stills paces past the window to reveal. STEPHEN STILLS A gig is a gig is a gig. pressed against the window. But maybe it’s the grown up thing to do.. RAMONA If my ex was in the band? SCOTT RAMONA It might be a little awkward. TOTALLY CRUSHED to see Scott cuddling with Ramona.

so good.. KNIVES CHAU It MUST be her fault. T KNIVES CHAU She's got a head start! I didn't even know there WAS good music until like two months ago! Okay.INTEGRATED FINAL 71. 68A INT. This is all her fault. so he tried to find someone cool but old. B A Why? KNIVES CHAU Well she THINKS she's cool. KNIVES CHAU (CONT'D) Oh God.. isn't it? Star crossed lovers! Born too late! Knives looks in the mirror: HER HAIR IS EXACTLY LIKE RAMONA. he knew I was cool but he thought I was too young. KNIVES’ BEDROOM . (CONTINUED) . Knives throws a long scarf on. you know? TAMARA I think you mentioned she was fa- 68A 68B INT.. KNIVES’ BATHROOM . TAMARA F KNIVES CHAU I mean. KNIVES CHAU He only likes her cause she's old! She's probably like 25! She's just some fat-ass white girl. eyes narrowing.EVENING Knives stands on her bed and continues ranting at Tamara. looking sexy.EVENING 68B TAMARA We should rinse- TAMARA She's cool? I thought she was fat- Tamara turns the faucet on and rinses Knives hair. A Tamara helps Knives color her hair under the bathtub spigot.I look so.. this really burns. Obviously it's just a twist of fate or whatever.

Sold out’. Sex Bob-Omb bow onstage.INTEGRATED FINAL 68B CONTINUED: 72.LATER A disillusioned Sex Bob-Omb hang with Ramona at the bar. She knows we suck. so(to Scott and Kim) Okay. LEE’S PALACE . STEPHEN STILLS We got some merch out the back. But I know how to get him back. The other snobbish kids in the audience shrug and disperse. The LOUD MUSIC stops abruptly. Wallace and Other Scott clap and cheer. 68B KNIVES CHAU (CONT'D) Scott Pilgrim destroyed my heart. as she plots. F T 70 INT. Ramona excuses herself. Now. STEPHEN STILLS Thank you. B A STEPHEN STILLS Level with me. PUSH into Knives.NIGHT 69 A huge line of TOO COOL YOUTHS snakes outside a rock venue. We hear loud music blasting through the open doors.CONTINUOUS A 70 . A sign reads ‘THE CLASH AT DEMONHEAD . Bar. LEE'S PALACE . 71 71 INT. We were Sex Bob-Omb. Tamara pops into frame. TAMARA How? We see a TEXT MESSAGE typing onscreen: “YUNG NEIL ITZ KNIVES. Did we suck? RAMONA I don’t know. Did you? STEPHEN STILLS She has to go. OMFG UR SO HOTT” 69 EXT. drunk. LEE’S PALACE .

SINGLE WHITE ASIAN" with identical hair. A 73 (CONTINUED) Ramona exits.. Knives follows. RAMONA What the hell? 73 INT. Knives heads into Young Neil’s arms at the other end of the bar. clothes and makeup. KNIVES CHAU Hey Scott. Scott breaks into a cold sweat.INTEGRATED FINAL 73. Or is it. RAMONA Who is that girl again? STEPHEN STILLS Scottdatedher. LEE'S PALACE . looking hot. F T . "KNIVES CHAU.MOMENTS LATER Ramona and Knives exit the bathroom together. Scott struggles with something resembling jealousy. SCOTT What the hell? B A KIM PINE Look who Knives is hanging with. KNIVES CHAU Hey Ramona. SCOTT Briefly. Briefly.. LEE'S PALACE. confused. LADIES BATHROOM . RAMONA Hey.MOMENTS LATER 72 Ramona does her eyeliner. 72 INT. 17. Knives shoots Scott a sultry look. KIM PINE I bet Young Neil will date her even briefly-er. She looks in the mirror to see two images of herself staring back. standing next to Ramona.

. B Todd flips his fringe from his eyes. EVIL-EX #3.. 25. The BASS PLAYER steps into the light. revealing a stunning figure. The lights dim and the stage fills with twisting blue tendrils of smoke. ENVY in a long black coat. Stares at Scott. SPOOKY MUSIC begins. MENS BATHROOM . (CONTINUED) . "TODD INGRAM. one with fringed hair and a wicked glare! Scott whips around.INTEGRATED FINAL 73 CONTINUED: 74. LEE’S PALACE.. You know? Oh yeah. her?” SCOTT I gotta pee on her. RAMONA ENVY SCOTT ENVY F THE CLASH AT DEMONHEAD materialize. FUN FACT: 9TH DEGREE VEGAN" SCOTT Oh no.” The wheel sticks between “I gotta pee. I gotta pee. striking ROCK GOD figure. 73 RAMONA How old is she? A “WHEEL OF FORTUNE” spins INSIDE SCOTT’S HEAD.” and “Who.. SCOTT That guy on bass? That’s Todd. (turns beet red) I mean. (sing songy) Peee time. 75 INT. he cuts a handsome. no longer shrouded in dry ice. Pee time.. LEE’S PALACE . Knives screams her teen brains out. Oh yeah. Envy lets her coat slip off. with selections such as “It was nothing” and “She was nobody. A I know. He’s alone..MOMENTS LATER T A 74 INT. Scott washes his hands and looks up to see TWO SCOTTS staring back.MOMENTS LATER 74 75 A freaked out Scott returns to the group.


. Scott hangs his head like a condemned man. you have to see them live. RAMONA Mmm hmm. SCOTT All of us? JULIE Did I fucking stutter? The group shuffles backstage. Knives makes a face that looks like this: 77 >:O !!!! 77 INT. but Envy Adams would like all of you to come backstage. 76 KNIVES CHAU Oh my God.NIGHT SEX BOB-OMB lounge on a couch on one side of the room. RATTY BACKSTAGE AREA . B Knives in shock as she thinks a thousand thoughts. LEE’S PALACE. Everyone else feels.“AWKWARD”. RAMONA Hey Todd.. YOUNG NEIL Scottdatedher. Todd and Julie lounge on a couch across from them. Envy. JULIE I can't believe I'm even saying this. Just oh my God. TODD INGRAM Hey Ramona. They’re so much better live. SCOTT I think I’m going to throw up.INTEGRATED FINAL 76 CONTINUED: 75. TODD INGRAM Mmm hmm. Envy burns a hole through Scott. TODD INGRAM Been a while. Julie opens the backstage door and huffs. YOUNG NEIL Man. Oh. A F KNIVES CHAU How do you know Envy??? T A (CONTINUED) .

you know? You suit each other. it’s not something I can really put into words. Affordable? JULIE I was going to say. 77 RAMONA (whispers to Scott) I think we should get out of here.Scott and Ramona eh? RAMONA What of it? ENVY You guys are a cute couple. in general? T A . Did you get those jeans in New York.Envy? I read your blog. She’s got a write-up in Spin! KNIVES CHAU You’re my role model Envy. B A JULIE She doesn’t need ulterior motives. JULIE How was the tour? You played with The Pixies? You’re a superstar now! ENVY It’s-yeah.INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: 76. cute couple. We played the Chaos Theatre for Gideon. KNIVES CHAU Um. right? (CONTINUED) F STEPHEN STILLS So what’s your ulterior motive Envy.. You know him.. I like your outfit Ramona. ENVY I was just there. Todd and Julie glare at Knives.. they’reENVY I’m talking to Ramona right now.. ENVY Just saying. ENVY So. Stephen. Envy. JULIE Ramona lived in New York.

POINTS at Envy and SCREAMSKNIVES CHAU I'VE KISSED THE LIPS THAT KISSED YOU! B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (2) 76A.Knives stands up.. 77 Scott looks at Ramona.. She is about to answer when.

Scott hovers. ENVY You’re incorrigible..your hair. YOUNG NEIL He punched the highlights. Young Neil escorts Knives out. Todd’s hair magically forms into a FAUXHAWK. Her hair is black and plain as before. 77 Envy nods at Todd. SCOTT KK.yy.. Scott’s face is a bright shade of rage. Todd smirks. JULIE So. grasping his neck... I’m a rock neck.. I’m not afraid to hit a girl. you cocky cock! YOU’LL PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY! Scott LEAPS across the table and SWINGS a punch at Todd. TODD INGRAM That’s right.. are you guys doing anything fun while you're in town? TODD INGRAM Fun? In Toronto? SCOTT That is IT. B A F T A (CONTINUED) .. FACING OFF against Todd Ingram. TODD INGRAM I don’t know the meaning of the word. He PUNCHES KNIVES SQUARE IN THE JAW! OMFG! Scott jumps to his feet. TODD INGRAM It’s not a big deal.. Her. choking.INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (3) 77. SCOTT Knives!? Young Neil rushes to Knives’ aid. ENVY Didn’t you know? Todd’s Vegan. Out. Hair. Todd THRUSTS a hand out and telekinetically FREEZES SCOTT IN THE AIR. Of. YOUNG NEIL You punched the highlights out of her hair! ANGLE on Knives. Todd sits back down like nothing happened. Scott boils.

vegan. He tries to keep cool. TODD INGRAM Bingo. Scott returns to earth with a THUMP. it’s because the other 90% is filled up with curds and whey. TODD INGRAM Ovo-lacto vegetarian maybe. to see Scott sprawled on some trash bags.. SCOTT Ovo what? TODD INGRAM I partake not in the meat nor breastmilk or ovum of any creature that has a face. While the others bicker. A (CONTINUED) .INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (4) 78. T ENVY Short answer: Being vegan just makes you better than most people. I always wondered. 77 Todd telekinetically HURLS Scott through the club’s wall! Ramona and Sex Bob-Omb peer through the newly made hole in the wall. would you pretend I just got wet from the rain? B A STEPHEN STILLS Hey man.anyone can be. SCOTT No kidding. SCOTT If I peed my pants. Scott sails out of shot and into space. maybe I’d listen to a word you’re saying. F Todd lifts up Scott telekinetically and throws him miles into the air. if you knew the science. KIM PINE Did you learn that at Vegan Academy? TODD INGRAM Go ahead and get snippy baby. He moans in pain. how does not eating dairy products give you psychic powers? TODD INGRAM You know how you only use ten percent of your brain? Well. question. Ramona helps Scott to his feet. despite being in a lot of pain....


RAMONA (V. RAMONA Look.O. Nobody cared. so I dumped him. RAMONA (V. I’ve dabbled with being a bitch.INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (6) 79. Nobody cares. 77 SCOTT Oh.O.O. he told me his Dad was sending him to the Vegan Academy. It’s part of the reason I moved here..) I was only dating Lucas until the minute Todd walked by. RAMONA (V. B A F T Young Ramona shoves Young Lucas down a hill and starts making out with Young Todd.O. It’s pretty crazy. SCOTT Have you dumped everyone you’ve ever been with? You’ve never been the dumpee? Ramona shrugs.) A week and a half later.) We hated everyone. I guess that’s not very nice.) He punched a hole in the moon for that. I was really hoping to put it all behind me. A brief. RAMONA (V. It was pretty crazy. We wrecked stuff. A (CONTINUED) . Young Ramona and Young Todd wreck stuff.. Does that help you at all? The FLASHBACK ends. How about you give me the Cliff Notes on how and why you ended up dating this a-hole? RAMONA Is that really important right now? SCOTT If there’s a key element in his backstory that can help me out in a critical moment of not dying? Yes. Young Todd punches a hole in the moon. but I used to be kind of. Scott can only fixate on one aspect. scrappy ANIMATED FLASHBACK of Young Todd and Ramona.

SCOTT You used to be so..ready for another round.. SCOTT TODD INGRAM Because I’ll be pulverizing you in two seconds. What? TODD INGRAM Because you’ll be dust by Monday.sort of ready for another round.dust.nice! F Um... She dusts.cleans up. so.Monday. And the cleaning lady. T SCOTT A SCOTT I.INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (7) 80. Capiche? Understand? (CONTINUED) . TODD INGRAM Don’t you talk to me about grammar! TODD INGRAM Tell it to the cleaning lady on Monday.. We hear a distant CRUMP. Right? ENVY Basically. Stills calls through the hole. TODD INGRAM We have unfinished business. STEPHEN STILLS Uh. who PSYCH-THROWS him back into the club. 77 Todd appears behind Ramona . we’re going to Pizza Pizza for a slice. B A SCOTT Sorry. I and he! Scott stands up ... SCOTT He and me.. call us when you’re done...dislike you. so what’s on Monday? TODD INGRAM Cos it’s Friday now and she has weekends off. ‘cos Todd is going to kill you... you can’t win this fight and you’ll have to give up on this girl. Scott CHARGES at Todd.

INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (8) 80A. 77 ENVY Oh. he’ll be done real soon. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

holding a cup of MILKY LOOKING COFFEE in either hand as a peace offering. I know. TODD INGRAM I can read your thoughts. I actually know how to play bass. Todd DETUNES his bass and delivers a death note that BLOWS Scott right through the stage wall. F SCOTT The reverb is hurting my soul!!! T A SCOTT stands in an elephant's graveyard of plastic cups and bottles. 77 Sex Bob-Omb skulks away. Todd floats toward him. LEE’S PALACE. Scott slides across the floor and slams right into the wall. picking the hell out of his bass. baby. Pilgrim. Vegan Style! Todd lands in front of Scott. Crummy way to end things. Envy appears beside him with a smirk. You’re through. ENVY Sorry. The enormous reverb LAUNCHES club debris towards Scott. Scott turns around on his knees. savoring the kill. Suddenly. SCOTT What say we drink to my memory? Fair trade blend with soymilk? B 79 INT. cringing. Todd LEVITATES. TODD INGRAM You’re going down. The good one.INTEGRATED FINAL 77 CONTINUED: (9) 81. LEE'S PALACE . Scott crashes into a backstage food table. floating towards Scott with his bass. He hovers next to him. 79 (CONTINUED) . Your bass hand is badly injured. shredding him into oblivion. RATTY BACKSTAGE AREA. TODD INGRAM Get me my bass. the bass-line from FINAL FANTASY 2 rumbles through the walls. Envy grins at Ramona. BASS OFF! PICKS STRIKE STRING! Todd easily out-basses Scott.CONTINUOUS 78 TODD INGRAM levitates. wicked. amp pegged to 10. fauxhawk rising. 78 INT.CONTINUOUS A TODD INGRAM That’s right. Todd calls to a roadie.

INTEGRATED FINAL 79 CONTINUED: 81A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . but that's pathetic. 79 ENVY I’m sorry.

tool. on February 1st. takes one of the cups and drinks. SCOTT Actually. TODD INGRAM But this is a first offense! Don’t I get three strikes? F VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #1 Todd Ingram. you knowingly ingested Gelato.m. in my mind's eye or whatever. TODD INGRAM What are you talking about? SCOTT You just drank Half & Half. making two more holes and pointing their fingers like deadly weapons. 7:30 p. (CONTINUED) B A TODD INGRAM That’s bullroar! VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #1 No vegan diet. no vegan powers.. bitch.m. I can see in your mind's eye that you poured Half & Half into one of these coffees in an attempt to make me break vegan edge. VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #2 At 12:27 a. but thought real hard about pouring it in that one. you partook a plate of Chicken Parmesan. 79 TODD INGRAM Dude. You know. TODD INGRAM Gelato isn’t vegan? VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #1 Milk and eggs. VEGAN POLICE OFFICERS Freeze! Vegan Police! Vegan Police Officer #2 flips open his CODE VIOLATION book. imbibement of Half & Half! T TWO TRENDY POLICE TYPES BUST IN THROUGH THE WALL. Todd floats to the ground. VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #2 On April 4th. I'll take the one with soy. I poured soy in this cup. Thanks. you’re under arrest for veganity violation code number 827. A .INTEGRATED FINAL 79 CONTINUED: (2) 82.

TODD INGRAM Chicken isn’t vegan? VEGAN POLICE OFFICER #1 The deveganizing ray! Hit him. Ramona follows. shooting Envy a look on the way out. ENVY Sorry? You just headbutted my boyfriend so hard he burst. RAMONA Crummy way to end things. TODD INGRAM NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! SCOTT You once were a vegone. 79 Envy gasps. A battle worn Scott limps through the hole in the wall. Envy blinks. So I guess we’re even. disgusted. Todd’s fauxhawk deflates into a bowl cut. Now let’s get out of here. Natalie. ENVY No one calls me that anymore. exploding him! POOM! Scott dusts himself off as COINS rain down.. SCOTT Maybe they should. Julie pops into shot. but now you will be gone! Vegone? Scott HEADBUTTS TODD. Envy stares. in shock. The Vegan Police BLAST Todd with arcs of power from their finger guns. T TODD INGRAM A Scott rises into a stance to deliver his killer line. I know.INTEGRATED FINAL 79 CONTINUED: (3) 83. B A SCOTT You kicked my heart in the ass. F SCOTT Uh. jaw ajar. sorry I guess. (CONTINUED) ..

A (CONTINUED) . Stills coughs. I hate that bitch so much I kind of love her.NIGHT Sex Bob-Omb.INTEGRATED FINAL 79 CONTINUED: (4) 84. 80 INT.. STEPHEN STILLS Cool bands never go to their own after parties. Julie. That Todd guy was cool too. 80 OTHER SCOTT Yeah. KIM PINE Then why would we. It’s an odd mood. RAMONA You sure about that? SCOTT Do I look like I’m not okay? Scott does not look okay. PIZZA PIZZA . I think a third of the band just went “poom”. STEPHEN STILLS Neil. I am so pissed off for you right now. And hot. Wallace and Other Scott munch pizza slices. on the fringes. you down? B A F T Scott sighs and holds a cold Coke Zero on his forehead. 79 JULIE For the record. It’s just the desperate people trying to rub elbows with label guys. STEPHEN STILLS We’re still going to the after show right? KIM PINE I’m not sure it’s gonna be much of a party..oh. ENVY Shut the fuck up. WALLACE Envy Adams. I liked him. RAMONA Are you okay? SCOTT Uh huh. Ramona and Scott.

so.. B 81 EXT. Other Scott whispers to Wallace. OTHER SCOTT WALLACE OTHER SCOTT 81 The whole gang trudge to the after party. RAMONA I’m not saying I want to go. So let’s go. we can totally go.NIGHT A Oh. RAMONA I’ll do whatever you want to do.INTEGRATED FINAL 80 CONTINUED: 85. STEPHEN STILLS (CONT’D) Scott? You’re in right? RAMONA Do you want to go? SCOTT I kind of almost died back there. RAMONA We really don’t have to go to this thing. Hey. Ooh. lagging behind. OTHER SCOTT Are Scott and Ramona fighting? WALLACE Not to my knowledge. Ramona falls back with him. Yet. F OTHER SCOTT T SCOTT A (CONTINUED) SCOTT . Scott takes another bite. not with fists. WALLACE I mean. 80 Neil is at the counter with a catatonic Knives. It’ll probably be a bad scene all around and we’ve already had a full night. Scott limps a bit. Oh.. He shrugs. AFTER PARTY .

I’m fine. I’m fine.? B A (CONTINUED) F T A .INTEGRATED FINAL 81 CONTINUED: 85A.. 81 SCOTT No. It’s justRAMONA It’s just..


86. 81

SCOTT Well, not that fighting harder and harder battles for your love is getting old or anything...but have you ever dated someone who wasn’t a total ass? RAMONA So far you’re not a total ass. SCOTT But I’m part ass?

SCOTT that good?

SCOTT But not...later?

SCOTT Yeah, I’d just like to live. Scott and Ramona enter a big, fartsy, artsy WAREHOUSE. 82 INT. AFTER PARTY - CONTINUOUS RAMONA Okay, I know Todd was bad news. But are you saying Envy wasn’t? We all have baggage. SCOTT My baggage doesn’t try and kill me every five minutes. What did you do to your ex-boyfriends to make them so insane? RAMONA Exes. SCOTT Whatever82




RAMONA Scott, I don’t have all the answers. I’d just like to live in the moment if I can.


RAMONA It’s what I need right now.


RAMONA If it makes you feel better, you’re the nicest guy I’ve dated.


87. 82

RAMONA No break up is painless. Someone always gets hurt. What about you and that girl Knives? SCOTT Knives? RAMONA Who broke up with who? SCOTT I believe...I broke up with her.

SCOTT Knives is with Young Neil now, she’s totally cool with it.

They pass Knives and Young Neil. She seemingly has no interest in her date and simply stares at Scott lovingly. RAMONA You sure about that?

We hear an offscreen distant ‘nooooo’ from Knives.

They pass Kim. She’s also staring at Scott. Not lovingly.


That’s it?

RAMONA And what about you and Kim?

SCOTT Me and Kim? I can barely remember. Why, is it important? RAMONA Hey, you want to know everything about my past, dude. SCOTT It was just...yeah. I don’t know. It was high school. She had freckles. It was cool, I guess. RAMONA SCOTT Yeah, it kind of ended. We changed.


SCOTT Yeah. She’s very mature for her age. It was a very healthy break up. We’re all peaches and gravy.



RAMONA And was she cool with that?


88. 82

Scott and Ramona have reached the bar at the party. RAMONA That’s really the whole story? SCOTT OKAY! I had to fight a dude to get with her! I fought a crazy eighty foot tall purple suited dude! And I had to fight 96 guys to get to him, too! He was flying and shooting lightning bolts from his eyes! He was totally awesome and I kicked him so far he saw the curvature of the earth! Does that make you feel any better? RAMONA Well now you are being a total ass. Welcome to the club.

SCOTT Sorry. I’m not usually like this.

PAF! A foot appears out of nowhere and KICKS Scott in the head, sending him flying across the dance floor. Scott looks up at his opponent, the MYSTERY ATTACKER! SCOTT (CONT’D) Girl from earlier? RAMONA Roxy? Scott gets up. The three square off in a triangle. SCOTT You know this girl?



SCOTT I guess this whole ex-boyfriends thing is really messing with my head. RAMONA

SCOTT Why do you keep saying-


RAMONA Hey, don’t worry. I don’t know what I’m like anymore.


In the back glass of the bar, Scott sees his reflection: fringed hair, wicked glare. He catches himself.


82 ROXY Oh boy. Roxy flips out of the hold. If Gideon can’t have you. ROXY It meant nothing??? RAMONA I was just a little bi-curious. 4TH EVIL EX : SAPPHIC AGGRESSIVE.she. ROXY Back off hasbian. F T A (CONTINUED) .talking about? ROXY He really doesn’t know? SCOTT (ping!) You and her?! “ROXY RICHTER.. B A ROXY Well honey.” RAMONA It was just a phase. ROXY Just a phase? SCOTT You had a sexy phase? RAMONA I didn’t think it would count! It meant nothing. RAMONA Then Gideon best get his pretentious ass up here.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (3) 89. Ramona CATCHES her foot mid-air.. clearing the busy dance no one can. SCOTT What.. The League hath spoken.. Roxy throws a SCORPION KICK at Scott’s face. 23. ‘cos I’m about to kick yours out of the Great White North. The girls square off. I’m a little bi-furious! RAMONA Do that again and I will end you. does she know me.

An embarrassed Scott watches with the rest of the crowd. This is a League game. SCOTT Wallace? WALLACE SCOTT This is happening right? WALLACE SCOTT I mean. Roxy REELS and SLAMS into the wall. this is live? Uh huh. 82 ROXY You unbelievable bitch. RAMONA pulls a LARGE HAMMER from her purse. Roxy HURLS the hammer out the window. Ramona springs off of various pieces of furniture. F WALLACE Oh yeah.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (4) 90. (CONTINUED) B A ROXY I’m sending you back to Gideon in a thousand pieces. Roxy slips her belt off and WHIPS A RAZOR SHARP FLYING GUILLOTINE BELT BUCKLE at Ramona! Ramona CARTWHEELS as the buckle sails between her legs and SMASHES into a DISCO BALL. He’s a creep. KICK HER IN THE BALLS. you slag. With blinding speed. Ramona. PAF! Roxy vanishes as Ramona SWINGS the hammer at her. RAMONA Believe it. ROXY Give it a rest. She BLOCKS with the hammer. LEAPING towards Roxy and PUNCHING HER IN THE FACE. RAMONA I’d rather be dead than go back. Ramona turns around just in time to see Roxy’s deadly belt SAILING towards her. you’re a bitch and you all deserve each other. Sound on one side of the room cuts out. RAMONA! T A Uh huh? . leaving a dent in it. It smashes a speaker. Mirrored shards fly everywhere. The belt wraps around it.

INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (5) 90A. ROXY Meaning your precious Scott must defeat me with his own fists. 82 RAMONA Meaning? Roxy points an accusing finger at the mortified Scott. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . Or possibly feet.

preparing to drop her boot of DEATH on Scott’s head. Roxy able to do this to herrrrrrrrrrr! Roxy screams in ecstasy before EXPLODING into COINS. ROXY Fight your own battles. lazy ass! ROXY (CONT’D) Every Pilgrim reaches the end of his journey.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (6) 91. kicking them apart with the splits. winces. 82 SCOTT I’m not sure I can hit a girl. They’re soft.F’s about to get F’d in the B! RAMONA Her weak point’s the back of her knees! SCOTT What? How does that work? As Roxy’s leg descends. ROXY (CONT’D) Your B. Roxy then KICKS Scott into the ceiling. ROXY (CONT’D) You’ll.never. Ramona positions Scott into a fighting stance as Roxy CHARGES with deadly intent. GRAPHIC: “TICKLE TICKLE!” ROXY Oh. RAMONA Whenever we were making out. Scott watches as Roxy giggles between spasms. . (CONTINUED) B A Okay. RAMONA You don’t have a choice.. A spent Scott is left standing in the middle of the room. throbbing with orgasmic meltdown..... Roxy lifts her leg over her head. Some sooner than others. still in the splits. She staggers. He lands HARD on the floor. She grins at Ramona. ISCOTT F T A PAF! Roxy disappears then REAPPEARS between Scott and Ramona.. Scott reaches up with one finger and lightly TICKLES the back of Roxy’s knee. Ramona puppeteers Scott into a furious volley of PUNCHES on Roxy.

People text furiously and point fingers at Scott.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (7) 91A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . a wave of gossip spreading around the room. 82 The party starts up again.

F SCOTT Maybe you could just give me a list of all your exes so at least I know who’s going to beat my ass into the ground next. The gossip echoes around them. (looks through bag) Maybe we could exchange our information. like a handy little laminate or something? Let me see if I can find one. T A (CONTINUED) ... SCOTT Two gin and tonics please. 82 Scott flushes red and retreats back to the bar. She touches her hair. is there anyone at this party you haven’t slept with? EVERY GUY AND GIRL AT THE PARTY HEY! Ramona stops. Scott has already downed his second drink. SCOTT As in ‘get out of here’? Or as in ‘split split’? B A RAMONA Oh.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (8) 92. RAMONA I guess we really don’t know that much about each other do we? Scott seems immediately drunk. Ramona follows tentatively. RAMONA I thought you didn’t drink. Looks hurt. SCOTT Just out of sheer curiosity and concern for my mortal well-being. RAMONA I really think we should split. SCOTT Only on special occasions. Ramona tries to lighten things. RAMONA Sooooo. Why? Did you want one? Scott swigs down his drink.

82 RAMONA I’d hope you could figure that out.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (9) 92A. Or did you miss the part where I saved your ass? B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

82 SCOTT How could I not? I feel like we just washed our sexy laundry in public. T RAMONA You’re just another evil exboyfriend waiting to happen. RAMONA Well I’m sorry I cared. SCOTT I just- Ramona walks off and loudly announces.. Ramona exits proper. I don’t enjoy all this Scott. You. SCOTT (holds up 2 fingers) I’ve had like one drink. STEPHEN STILLS’ HOUSE . INGRAM. GIDEON.. identical Asian twins dressed like pretentious New Wave fops. I thought you might be more understanding. Scott’s friends gather round in a pity party. there is someone at this party I haven’t slept with. F RAMONA (CONT’D) And yes. Scott looks at the list. A (CONTINUED) .S. It reads“PATEL. Another crescendo of gossip echoes around the room. Here’s your stupid list. Ramona leaves. handing Scott a LAMINATED LIST. RAMONA Dirty laundry. STEPHEN STILLS They’re the next band in the battle and they are badass. In fact I’m sick of it. RICHTER.” 83 INT.INTEGRATED FINAL 82 CONTINUED: (10) 93.Ramona returns.NIGHT B A But then . KATAYANAGI TWINS. LEE. RAMONA (CONT’D) P. SCOTT Who the hell are the Katayanagi Twins? STEPHEN STILLS You don’t know? 83 Stills flips to hand drawn sketches of THE KATAYANAGIS. You’re drunk.


94. 83

We reveal a grim, terse Scott playing a doomy bassline. The rehearsal room feels empty without Knives or Ramona. KIM PINE Ramona dated twins? SCOTT Apparently. YOUNG NEIL At the same time? SCOTT You know what? I don’t know and I don’t want to know. STEPHEN STILLS Good. You know how I feel about girls cockblocking the rock.

STEPHEN STILLS If it’s gonna be an issue though, Young Neil can fill in for you.


EXT. THE NINTH CIRCLE - NIGHT Sex Bob-Omb and Young Neil load their gear at the venue. STEPHEN STILLS Okay. We’re doomed. YOUNG NEIL Oh...


STEPHEN STILLS Well, we’d understand if you didn’t want to take part. SCOTT Not only do I want to take part. I want to take them apart. STEPHEN STILLS Okay. I’m getting tingles. YOUNG NEIL 84


SCOTT It’s not an issue. You know bands, I know battles. We got it covered.


SCOTT Good. I play better in a bad mood.



94A. 84

Flyers cover the outside walls of another rock venue; “T.I.B.B! SEX BOB-OMB!! THE KATAYANAGI TWINS!!! AMP VERSUS AMP!!!! TWO BANDS ENTER!!!!!! ONE BAND LEAVES!!!!!!!!!!!” KIM PINE That flyer needs more exclamation marks.







95. 84

STEPHEN STILLS Oh, we are going to get killed. YOUNG NEIL Come on. You’re onstage in five. SCOTT Aren’t the Katamaris or whatever on first? YOUNG NEIL I think you’re both on first?

SCOTT That’s impossible85


Two stages sit on either side of the auditorium. On one: a MONOLITHIC WALL OF ELK AMPLIFIERS. On the other, SEX BOB-OMB, with their dinky LAME BRAND amps behind them. SCOTT Okay. My bad.

KIM PINE Your bad is saying my bad. Sex Bob-Omb stare up at the Katayanagi amps, sweating behind their instruments. Stills looks into the audience positioned between the bands: a legion of identical INDIE TEENS. STEPHEN STILLS We shouldn’t even be here. We shouldn’t even be here.

Stills tries to run. Scott grabs him and pulls him back. SCOTT Come on man! I put aside my problems for the music. If I can do that, we can do anything. KIM PINE Did you speak to Ramona then? SCOTT What? No. I haven’t seen her since the other night.







STEPHEN STILLS Wait...amp versus amp? We’re going on stage at the same time?


and she stands next to a nondescript MYSTERY GEEK in blazer and black rimmed glasses. KYLE KATAYANAGI. STEPHEN STILLS Okay gang. A wall of FEEDBACK builds.THE KATAYANAGI TWINS appear. sliding onstage behind their respective keyboard stands. An earth shaking BASS NOTE blows the dust off Sex Bob-Omb.. Right? KIM PINE Scott is distracted again by the Mystery Geek staring at him.) They brought the house down. (CONTINUED) .but you should talk to her before she’s gone. we can do this. The crowd cheers. KEN KATAYANAGI. She is totally there.. Can we do this? I mean. B Kyle Katayanagi hits a SINGLE NOTE on the keyboard. 23. Scott.. SCOTT Thanks KiKIM PINE Scott nods at Kim’s advice. ThenDisorienting LIGHTS and LASERS flash on the opposite stage. They are chatting. SNOW falls onto the stage. leaving a huge hole in the roof. 23. Scott turns bleak again. Stephen Stills and Kim share a nervous look. He looks back to the crowd to find the MYSTERY GEEK staring right at him. is serious and very Japanese. AUDIENCE DUDE (O. It’s so loud that it shakes the foundations and rips the lighting rig from the ceiling. Now an open air venue. She looks happy.. Her hair is now the BRIGHTEST GREEN. Scott and Stills get into battle position.INTEGRATED FINAL 85 CONTINUED: (2) 96.. Scott screams! A Scott? Scott! Right. 85 Kim points to RAMONA in the crowd. F KIM PINE STEPHEN STILLS T A And I really don’t care...S. blasting an enormous wave of sound at Sex Bob-Omb. is very serious and Japanese.. KIM PINE Scott? Not that I care.

For once. then helps Kim up. T A (CONTINUED) .. their sound blowing a mass of snow towards the Katayanagis. Scott. We screwed the pooch in front of Gideon Graves. Heavy weirdness EXPLODES from the amps! The Dragon blows a BLAST of snowy fire that BLOWS SEX BOB-OMB OFF THE here? Where? SCOTT That’s Gideon? Heads nod in time as Sex Bob-Omb ROCK OUT! Their waveforms transform a mass of snow into a GREEN EYED YETI! The Katayanagis fight back with their future sounds and their Sonic Dragon stalks towards Sex Bob-Omb. Ken turns their amps up to the Japanese character for “11”. 85 SCOTT WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB! WE ARE HERE TO MAKE YOU THINK ABOUT DEATH AND GET SAD AND STUFF! 1-2-3-4! Sex Bob-Omb ROCK OUT. who smirks and whispers in Ramona’s ear. The Yeti brings it’s fists down on The Dragon. comes in heavy on the kick drum. 37. Kim and Stills lie in a heap under their instruments. Their waveforms transform the swirling snow into a TWO HEADED WHITE DRAGON! Katayanagi SLAM their Moogs. slinking on perfect beat with the Katayanagis’ spooky music. fighting in time to the music! Scott and Stills bring their pick hands down like fierce PUNCHES. Sex Bob-Omb HAMMER DOWN THE FINAL NOTE: B Kim. The Yeti and the Dragons CLASH at center stage. He struggles to his feet. SCOTT Gideon. This is GIDEON GRAVES. We’re done. The crowd ERUPTS into cheers. BOOM-BOOM-BOOM-BOOM! A Scott’s eyes reflect Ramona’s hair and turn GREEN. SCOTT Alright.INTEGRATED FINAL 85 CONTINUED: (3) 97. ASSHOLE. inspired by Scott’s new hardcore attitude. Let’s do this! F Stills points to the “Mystery Geek”. they sound awesome. Kyle looks at Ken. STEPHEN STILLS Let’s break up now and get it over with. The crowd slowly stops clapping as Scott pulls Stills to his feet. They share a nod.

The crowd goes bazooky. B Scott and Knives lock eyes.was epic. SCOTT Ramona. 86 EXT. I’m not even stalking you. Scott suddenly spots a flash of GREEN HAIR exiting the building. Knives watches him go... F T Scott swipes the SCOTT HEAD and jumps into the stillapplauding crowd. He can’t find Ramona. different. Scott hands his bass to Young Neil. but comes upon KNIVES standing alone in her homemade Sex Bob-Omb T-shirt.. Scott looks for Ramona in the crowd. 85 The Yeti picks up The Dragon and THROWS it at the Katayanagi Twins. SCOTT Ramona.... I have something I need to tell you. A (CONTINUED) STEPHEN STILLS Scott. but she and Gideon are gone. hovering next to Scott. THE NINTH CIRCLE .NIGHT 86 Scott chases Ramona down the street outside the venue. KNIVES CHAU I just came to see the show. KNIVES CHAU I feel like I know stuff now. different. Knives’s unusally composed demeanor gives Scott pause. SCOTT You seem.INTEGRATED FINAL 85 CONTINUED: (4) 98. Scott follows. I have something to- A Knives shrugs. “+999 ROCKING” KIM PINE That. A DISEMBODIED SCOTT HEAD appears. RAMONA Yeah. eyes narrowing. What are you doing? . EXPLODING them and their amps into COINS. SCOTT Getting a life.

Listen. really mean it. I don’t care about any of that stuff. I know you just play mysterious and aloof to avoid getting hurt. RAMONA What? B A (CONTINUED) F T A SCOTT I really.INTEGRATED FINAL 86 CONTINUED: 98A. Why? Because I’m in lesbians with you. I know you have reasons for not wanting to talk about your past. And I want you to know. . 86 SCOTT (rushed) Great.

I’m signing you right now for a three album's not going to work out. SCOTT A sleek black ‘61 Lincoln Continental pulls up behind. A driver opens the passenger door. SCOTT What did you want to tell me? RAMONA That we have to break up. B A Bob-omb. GIDEON GRAVES Three piece rock outfit with a semiattractive female drummer? Music to my earholes. What? SCOTT RAMONA Yeah. The Lincoln parks.I can’t help myself around him. 86 RAMONA Oh. T RAMONA It’s Gideon.) That’s the bad news. GIDEON GRAVES The good news.. GIDEON GRAVES See? I’m not such a bad guy after all.. A (CONTINUED) .S. VOICE (O.. Okay.. Stills is ga-ga. I’m not even going to wait to see how you guys do in the final. TEXT: An arrow points to Stills’ crotch. F SCOTT GIDEON GRAVES appears behind Scott with Stills and Kim in tow.. Ramona looks at the floor.INTEGRATED FINAL 86 CONTINUED: (2) 99. Scott glowers. Gideon produces a CONTRACT and clicks a pen. GIDEON GRAVES You know. Scottie. captioned “PEE”. I just. Oh okay. is I’m officially loving the Sex Bombs..

86 Scott GRABS the contract and throws it onto the sidewalk.INTEGRATED FINAL 86 CONTINUED: (3) 99A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

Gideon walks around to the driver side of the Lincoln. F T STEPHEN STILLS The people need to hear us. buddy. She rolls the mirrored window up so Scott stares at his own reflection. before trying to hand it back to Scott. He slaps his headSCOTT I said ‘lesbians’! B A Young Neil signs the contract. she wouldn’t be back with me. Forgiven? Gideon disappears into the Lincoln and drives off and Sex Bob-Omb drift away. Scott watches Ramona get into the Continental. we should really be thanking each other. can I just say. GIDEON And hey. Kim shrugs and signs it too. A . Stills has picked up the contract and is furiously signing it using Scott’s back. There are hand shakes all round. keep your emotions in check. GIDEON Looks like we’re all set. the whole League of Evil Exes thing? I was in a dark place when I put that together. SCOTT Then you’re going to need to find someone else to play bass. A meek Young Neil slides into view. you would have never been with Ramona. if it wasn’t for me. GIDEON GRAVES Scottie. SCOTT Nuh-uh. Gideon turns to Scott and pats him on the shoulder. but if it wasn’t for you. GIDEON Oh and Scott. So I guess it all shakes out.INTEGRATED FINAL 86 CONTINUED: (4) 100. I can’t be part of the band with this douche-in-charge. I mean. Scott. A cough. Don’t let what’s past screw up your future. bass in hand. Scott stands alone. 86 SCOTT You think we’re gonna sell our souls to you? Well then guessWe hear SCRIBBLING.

. Scott tries desperately to think positive...NIGHT Scott sits on the bus alone... 87 B A (CONTINUED) F T A . Ramona sits expressionless in the back of Gideon’s car...INTEGRATED FINAL 100A. A smiling Gideon sidles closer to Ramona.. thinking about Ramona. 87 INT. THE BUS / GIDEON’S LINCOLN .

NIGHT / DAY / NIGHT Scott sits on the swings. Scott remains in the exact same position. SCOTT The wha? STACEY I mean.S. F T A STACEY (O.) TURN OFF THE LIGHT! Scott flicks the light off. “OH GOD WHY” A88 EXT. A88 Scott looks over to see STACEY on the swing next to him. Flicks the light on. Night turns to day. Over PITCH BLACK. “THONK”. 87 Scott walks forlornly down an empty street and bumps his head on a telephone pole. gives Scott a hug. 88 B A STACEY Oh. Day turns to night...NIGHT Scott enters.with jetpacks? Stacey stands to go. Well that’s not so bad. little brother.INTEGRATED FINAL 87 CONTINUED: 101. 88 INT. THE PARK . SCOTT Seven. SCOTT Aaah! WALLACE (O. STACEY Time heals all wounds. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . Maybe next time let’s not date the girl with eleven evil exboyfriends. Stacey heads off. did you really see a future with this girl? SCOTT Like. Gets a shock.. Scott looks at the camera.S. staring straight ahead..) Was she really the one? (CONTINUED) .

) Or someone. F SCOTT WALLACE Scott. you know I love you.S. Wallace hands Scott cocoa.S.S. SCOTT And the year. A Right.) Sorry. WALLACE Ah. SCOTT She’s with Gideon. WALLACE'S APARTMENT .S. But I need my own bed tonight.S.INTEGRATED FINAL 88 CONTINUED: 102. WALLACE I may need it the rest of the week too. 89 INT. wrapped in a blanket. and I apologize for that. 88 WALLACE (O.) Was that Other Scott or Jimmy or someone? WALLACE (O.LATER A 89 (CONTINUED) VOICE (O. SCOTT WALLACE Maybe you can move in with Ramona. SCOTT (O. it’s probably just because he’s better than you. WALLACE (O. For sex.) It’s Chris.) It’s Chris.S) Presumably you just saw someone’s junk. Scott sits in the chair. VOICE (O. SOME GUY lies in Scott’s usual futon spot (wearing Wallace’s monogrammed robe). I get it. Right. T . But you know. B Scott stares deep into his cocoa and shakes his head. That sucks.

WALLACE He’ll certainly have better hair. 89 Scott nods. Scott nods.INTEGRATED FINAL 89 CONTINUED: 102A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

91 (CONTINUED) . it’s gonna be alright.) Yeah.CONTINUOUS A SCOTT Is Ramona with you? 90 Gideon appears to sit on some kind of throne.) Hey.S. so I figured why not be the bigger man and give you a call. WALLACE You can sleep on the floor until you get somewhere else to stay. 89 WALLACE Either way. Are you with me? RAMONA (O. He calls off. F GIDEON GRAVES (O. SCOTT (takes phone) Hello? 90 INT. pal. I just spilled cocoa on my crotch. SCOTT (O. SOME GUY It’s for Scott. GIDEON'S LAIR . I think this fight is over.S.INTEGRATED FINAL 89 CONTINUED: (2) 103.CONTINUOUS SCOTT No. I don’t want any hard feelings. Scott nods. Scott stares at the phone. Wallace produces earmuffs and a sleep mask. Just wanted to say I feel terrible about earlier. T A Thanks. INT. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . Some guy picks up. SCOTT RINGY RING.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! GIDEON GRAVES Geez buddy. B 91 GIDEON GRAVES I don't know. I got you muffs and blinkers in case this might happen.S.

The Hipster Kid waves Scott in. STREETS OF TORONTO . What do you say? . HIPSTER KID T A GIDEON GRAVES (O. Finish him. They just did a sound check and the acoustics in here are amazing.INTEGRATED FINAL 91 CONTINUED: 104.) I hope so. amigo. F SCOTT WALLACE (O. 92 EXT. SCOTT Mm.NIGHT A WALLACE Forget what I said earlier. leaning against a warehouse wall.S) Sure you did. Scott turns.S. I don’t want anymore bad blood between ex’s. HIPSTER KID Cool. Well as you know. SCOTT (grim) Yeah. 91 GIDEON GRAVES (O. Whatever.S. GIDEON GRAVES Okay laters.) What a perfect asshole. 92 Snow blows around a steely eyed Scott as he stomps towards a group of desolate WAREHOUSES near the water. REVEAL Wallace on the other cordless. alarmed. and it would feel really weird for all of us if you weren’t there. Click. I’m opening a new Chaos Theatre in Toronto and The Sex Bobs are playing our grand opening tonight. Maybe I’ll see you there. B Password? Scott shrugs. A lone HIPSTER KID smokes a cigarette.

WAREHOUSE . Two Hipster Kids guard the elevator. 93 INT.INTEGRATED FINAL 104A. Scott follows the sound of music to a GATED ELEVATOR. HIPSTER KID Cool. So far so good. Scott steps into the elevator. HIPSTER KID Second password? Scott gives the slightest shrug.NIGHT 93 The warehouse is empty. B A F T A .

All HIPSTER KIDS have gathered in one spot of ultimate snobbery. GIDEON GRAVES Hey buddy. Scott turns to see GIDEON sitting on a throne of cool atop a BLACK VELVET VIP PYRAMID. Somebody get this man a drink! Coke Zero right? A COCKTAIL WAITRESS with a fringe appears with a Coke Zero. Chuck Taylors.S. their first album is so much better than their first album. (CONTINUED) .with you? B A GIDEON GRAVES (O.CONTINUOUS 94 Scott exits the elevator and steps into GIDEON'S UNDERGROUND LAIR OF COOL SHIT. welcome to the Chaos Theatre.) Scott Pilgrim! F SCOTT What if I want the satisfaction? T Scott pauses. skinny jeans. then you’re doomed. COMEAU Yeah. They are legion. CHAOS THEATRE . SEX BOB-OMB are playing onstage.. A Scott pushes through the idiot hordes. looking up at his former bandmates. YOUNG NEIL on bass. now using SWEET BRAND amps. STEPHEN STILLS Scott! STEPHEN STILLS (CONT’D) Let it go. SCOTT What if I have a beef. Ramona kneels at his side. Stills sees Scott walking by as they finish a song... STEPHEN STILLS Well. 94 INT. COMEAU holds court among them.INTEGRATED FINAL 105. Scott takes the beverage and THROWS THE CUP TO THE FLOOR! SCOTT I’m not here to drink. wearing identical outfits.. GIDEON GRAVES I got no beef with you.the CHAOS THEATRE. Don’t give him the satisfaction.

whatever. Gideon smiles.O. 94 GIDEON GRAVES Are you still mad about that whole thing with the Guild? SCOTT You mean “The League”? GIDEON Guild. SCOTT Was that not clear? (to Sex Bob-Omb) Sex Bob-Omb shake their heads.INTEGRATED FINAL 94 CONTINUED: 106. It’s ancient history.. (CONTINUED) . Kimberly? B A Was that not clear? F GIDEON GRAVES You want to fight me for her? T A SCOTT I’ll show you how ancient of history it is.. flexes. GIDEON GRAVES I think this deserves a song. He reaches for the HEART DESIGN printed on his ratty vintage Tshirt and pulls a FLAMING BLUE SWORD from his own chest. GIDEON GRAVES Now why on earth do you want to do that? SCOTT Because. The lady made her choice and we’re all gonna have to move on. Gideon puts his arm around Ramona. buddy. Ramona looks away from Scott. A new power comes over Scott.. Ramona and Scott lock eyes.) Scott earned the power of love. League.. Gideon loses his cool.buddy. I’m in love with her. Gideon stands up. SCOTT Well I ain’t moving. GIDEON GRAVES No use crying over spilt Coke. NARRATOR (V. Scott gets into a fighting stance.

. Kim clicks out a fast tempo. exploding each attacker into COINS. both concerned and amazed. GIDEON GRAVES Ramona. He unsheathes a SWORD that could not have fit in there.) SCOOOOOOOOOTT!!! KNIVES CHAU sails into frame and KICKS the sword out of Gideon’s hands. tripping and falling down the side of the pyramid. She quickly recovers and POINTS a furious finger.INTEGRATED FINAL 94 CONTINUED: (2) 107. Then from above. Scott and Gideon LEAP towards each other. GIDEON GRAVES That is priceless. ON BEAT. by the way.S. 94 Kim scratches her head with her middle finger before grudgingly launching into a number.. A Scott then RUNS up the side of the pyramid towards Gideon. And fast entrance into HELLLLLLL. Sex Bob-Omb begin to ROCK OUT. then I shall grant you a swift exit from the premises. Gideon chuckles. (CONTINUED) . Scott looks to Knives. “KNIVES CHAU. FUN FACT: SCOTTAHOLIC” B A F T Ramona hands Gideon a cane with G-MAN engraved on the handle. we are here to make money. KNIVES CHAU (O.. SCOTT Your club sucks. He slashes at them to the beat. to administer a final blow. and sell out and stuff.. A HORDE OF HIPSTER INDIE KIDS ATTACK SCOTT PILGRIM. Gideon approaches. KIM PINE We are Sex Bob-Omb. Scott swings at them with his FLAMING BLUE SWORD. Scott hits the ground HARD.Gideon descends like a vulture and SMASHES the sword out of Scott’s hands. My cane. 18 YEARS OLD. Gideon raises his sword. rolling to a stop. She lands awkwardly. GIDEON If my cathedral of cutting edge taste holds no interest for your tragically Canadian sensibilities.

RAMONA What the hell is your deal? KNIVES CHAU You stole him with your advanced American slut technology. He was warned plenty of times. sending him flying off the edge of the pyramid. GIDEON lashes out at Scott. Scott lands a KICK to Gideon’s chest. 94 KNIVES CHAU You’ll pay for what you did to him! GIDEON GRAVES Listen. RAMONA I don’t know what you’re talking about. But did he listen? Did he fKNIVES CHAU I’m not talking to you. distracted by his duelling exes. separating them. I didn’t steal anyone. DUAL DUEL! The fighters weave in and out of each other. Kung Pao Chicken. redirecting Knives’ parries without harming her. RAMONA What? KNIVES CHAU YOU BROKE THE HEART THAT BROKE MINE! GET READY TO CHAU DOWN! Knives leaps up the pyramid toward a shocked Ramona! RAMONA You’re kidding right? GIDEON You can’t say I don’t know how to put on a show. B A F Knives pulls out KNIVES and charges! Ramona fights defensively. He then BLOCKS a punch from Knives to Ramona and spins her away. T A (CONTINUED) . I’m talking to HER! Angle on a confused RAMONA standing behind Gideon. your old old boyfriend brought this all on himself.INTEGRATED FINAL 94 CONTINUED: (3) 108. throwing blocks and punches. KUNG FU STYLE. He can barely block Gideon’s tremendous blows.

.SAND blows through frame.Scott's eyes blink open. Okay? (beat) I mean. F T (CONTINUED) A Knives and Ramona both look at Scott..cheat.. I dated you and then I dated Ramona. SCOTT Right? STAB! A sword pierces Scott’s chest from behind. RAMONA You cheated on me with Knives? SCOTT No! I cheated on Knives.) GIDEON GRAVES Scottie.. You can cheat on these ladies all you want... 94 SCOTT Can we please stop all this fighting! Nobody stole anybody.death.maybe I kind of forgot to tell Knives right away.. GIDEON (O.. With you. rubbing his temples. 95 B A Game over! Knives and Ramona stare at Scott. Scott! (eyes narrowing) You cheated on both of us. but.. RAMONA Is there a difference? SCOTT You weren’t wronged? Scott breaks into a flop sweat. . He looks up into a BLINDING BLUE SKY.. TEXT WITH ARROW POINTING TO SCOTT: “DEAD” Everything goes white.INTEGRATED FINAL 94 CONTINUED: (4) 109.. but you can’t. Scott slides off Gideon’s sword and falls to the ground. Knives. THE DREAM DESERT ....S.DAY Scott sits up next to a lone cactus. KNIVES CHAU Then you cheated on me.. neither amused. 95 EXT..

fainter than before.INTEGRATED FINAL 95 CONTINUED: 109A. Ramona appears out of nowhere. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . 95 SCOTT Ugh.

SCOTT You know what sucks? Getting killed by THAT guy. But he ignored me. SCOTT So this kinda sucks for everybody. I really will leave you alone forever now. that’s legitimately disappointing. I mean. RAMONA He’s like that. I was more alone when we were together than I ever was on my own. SCOTT That is evil.. F RAMONA I can’t help myself around him. SCOTT Well. eh? B A SCOTT Well.. RAMONA No. 95 RAMONA I’m sorry. Seeing as I’m about to die.. RAMONA Alright. T A (CONTINUED) . maybe now would be the time to get into it..INTEGRATED FINAL 95 CONTINUED: (2) 110. revealing a blinking CHIP implanted on her skull.. I was crazy about him. That’s why I had to leave. the truth is. has a way of getting into my head. He just... Ramona covers the chip. SCOTT So why go back? Ramona lifts her hair up on the back of her head. self-consciously touching her hair. Why him? RAMONA It’s complicated.. it was me who was obsessed. Scott. he literally has a way of getting into my head. Dying probably sucks. and that’s when he started paying attention.

SCOTT I feel like I learned something.. as Scott enters. 96 INT. The winds blow harder. Ramona is gone.. Scott’s eyes go wide with epiphany. SCOTT . I guess. We had a good run. then FAST FORWARD through the breakup with Ramona and Sex Bob-Omb. Scott slumps to his knees. SCOTT So. RAMONA Uh-huh. T A (CONTINUED) RAMONA But someone was fighting pretty hard for you back there.. .AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. DA-DING. He flicks the light on. Which would be great if I wasn’t dead. B We FLASH BACK to Scott swiping the PILGRIM HEAD.. Ramona seeming to fade away.NIGHT 96 We FAST FORWARD all the way to Wallace’s apartment.INTEGRATED FINAL 95 CONTINUED: (3) 111. The PILGRIM-HEAD appears and rotates around Scott. A Ahhhhhh. F SCOTT Ramona slowly dissolve away in the sand. 95 RAMONA I’m sorry it had to end this way. WALLACE'S APARTMENT . I really fought for you back there.. We hear Scott screaming throughout this magical restart.. SCOTT Knives? RAMONA I wish I was ever as fanatically devoted to anything as that girl is to you. SCOTT You can’t say I didn’t alone..

Then I resurrected! Now I realize what I should have been fighting for all along.) Turn off the light! Scott flicks the light off.. SCOTT Wallace. I died. when my journey began. Gideon Graves.) F T A (CONTINUED) . B A Um.S. So I did. SCOTT Could you put a robe on and hand me the phone? SCOTT Toronto.INTEGRATED FINAL 96 CONTINUED: 112.. GIDEON GRAVES (O. during which I totally seized the sword.. that’s you. a call I considered refusing.. But before I do that. On PITCH BLACK. I feel terrible about everything.S. enemies. pal. I need to ask one final favor of you. Ramona skated through my dreams and it was like a call to adventure..S. I was just about toSCOTT Hey.S. guy. told me if I want something bad enough I have to fight for it. allies. I don’t want any hard feelings. (beat) Tell him Scott Pilgrim is calling. There were tests. hands him the phone. Chaos Theatre. so I figure why not be the bigger man and give you a call.) Scott. I was living in an ordinary world. I approached a deep cave and went through a crazy ordeal. 96 SCOTT .) Sure thing. WALLACE (O. GIDEON GRAVES (O..S. Wallace flicks on a bedside lamp.AAAAAAAAAHHH! I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAD TO SEE THAT AGAIN! SOME GUY (O. But my Mentor.) Again? WALLACE (O. Sadly.

WALLACE GO KICK THAT GUY’S ASS! Wallace stands to high five Scott. exposing his junk.INTEGRATED FINAL 96 CONTINUED: (2) 112A. WALLACE (CONT’D) Ah. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . hardcore. sorry. what I meant to say is “I’m coming over to kill you”. Scott hangs up and heads for the door. 96 SCOTT Sorry.

Stephen. knocking them out. 99 INT. COMEAU Yeah..DAY 98 Scott approaches the two Hipster Kids guarding the ELEVATOR. B A Scott KNOCKS DOWN Comeau and looks to Sex Bob-Omb. SCOTT Your hair looks stupid. you shall be known as “Neil”. 97 EXT. Young Neil? You have learned well.everything. their first album is so99 Kim looks at Scott.INTEGRATED FINAL 96 CONTINUED: (3) 113. SCOTT (CONT’D) Sorry about me. HIPSTER KID ‘Sup? SCOTT Whatever. STEPHEN STILLS Scott! Let it go.. SCOTT (CONT’D) Sorry about.DAY 97 Scott Pilgrim RUNS towards the desolate WAREHOUSES. The Hipster Kid EXPLODES into COINS. I know what I’m doing.. And Kim? F T A (CONTINUED) .CONTINUOUS DING! Scott exits the elevator and steps into GIDEON'S UNDERGROUND LAIR OF COOL SHIT: THE CHAOS THEATRE. WAREHOUSE . From this point forward. SCOTT Don’t worry. STREETS OF TORONTO ... 98 INT. the new line-up rocks. The same HIPSTER KID smokes a cigarette against the wall. 96 SCOTT You seen one. deadpan as ever. You guys sound better without me.AGAIN. Scott SPLIT KICKS them in the faces.. Kim shrugs. CHAOS THEATRE .

INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: 113A. 99 Kim SMILES at Scott for the first time ever. B A (CONTINUED) F T A .

I have beef.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (2) 114. AND WE ARE HERE TO WATCH SCOTT PILGRIM KICK YOUR TEETH IN! F SCOTT NARRATOR (V. A GIDEON GRAVES You want to fight me for her? (CONTINUED) . Ramona and Scott lock eyes.I want to fight you for me. let’s do it. Scott goes straight into fight mode. welcome to the ChaosSCOTT Save it. the club sucks. Ramona at his side.) Scott Pilgrim! Scott turns to GIDEON on his throne. Scott swings his FLAMING RED SWORD.. LEAPING in the air. exploding each attacker into COINS.O. Sex Bob-Omb ROCK THE FUCK OUT. SCOTT How’s it going back there? GIDEON GRAVES You dick. They pass in the air and Scott SLASHES. Scott reaches for the HEART DESIGN printed on his ratty Tshirt and pulls a FLAMING RED SWORD from his own chest. 99 GIDEON GRAVES (O..S. Kim? Kim drives a hardcore beat. different than before.) Scott earned the power of self-respect. Scott and Gideon RUN towards each other. A strange new power overcomes Scott. Ramona hands Gideon his cane. He unsheathes his SWORD. A KIM PINE WE ARE SEX BOB-OMB. GIDEON GRAVES (CONT’D) Hey buddy. You’re pretentious. My cane. B HIPSTERS ATTACK SCOTT PILGRIM to the BEAT. backs to each other. They land on opposite sides of the platform. GIDEON GRAVES Ramona. T SCOTT No.

apparently.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (3) 114A. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . 99 Gideon falls down. Dead. Scott calls out.

99 SCOTT Knives! I know you’re in here! Don’t attack RaKnives SAILS through the air and KICKS Ramona in the head SUPER HARD. I cheated on you. Knives pulling KNIVES. KNIVES CHAU Steal my boyfriend. Knives steps back. are we all good? F T KNIVES CHAU No. stunned. Ramona staggered. GIDEON GRAVES (O. Ramona rubs the back of her head. And I’m sorry. Scott turns to Ramona. bloodied. but still grinning. The CHIP no longer blinks. B A SCOTT I cheated on both of you. taste my steel. hands held out. Knives. SCOTT (CONT'D) And. Scott GRABS her wrists. ENOUGH! Knives tries to go around him. SCOTT No..S. KNIVES CHAU You cheated on me Scott? Knives’ frown melts. We hear a METALLIC KLONK. RAMONA Never felt better.) Are we all done with the hugging and learning? I thought we had a fight going here. All turn to see GIDEON. Scott jumps between them. She kicks him in the face. She didn’t mean that.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (4) 115. I was a different guy back then. I hurt you. They square off. So. Scott! This fat ass hurt me and I will have my revenge! A SCOTT (CONT’D) (CONTINUED) . a lopsided slash across his face accentuating his're not a fat ass..

Knives joins him. B A (CONTINUED) F T A . the three of them ready to rumble. Scott steps into a fighting stance. Are you with me? Ramona looks to Gideon. 99 SCOTT Oh.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (5) 115A. GIDEON Ramona. then joins Scott and Knives and STRIKES A FIGHT POSE. you got a fight alright.

He cuts big arcs at Scott.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (6) 116. That’s going to be in my digestive tract for seven years! F Scott and Knives punch Gideon in the face in a volley of FREEZE FRAMES. He makes an “X” with his fingers and a draws a NEW POWER UP SWORD. disarms Scott with one move. baby. He shakes off the assault and grins. Scott blocks with his sword and is sent UP into the air. They fence. She looks doubtful. SHING SHING! Gideon wheels towards Ramona. 99 GIDEON (CONT’D) Wrong move. dropping her. GIDEON You made me swallow me gum. Gideon SWINGS his sword at Ramona. Ramona steps up to Gideon and whispers in his ear. Ramona KICKS. Scott’s sword SHATTERS. knocking her down. RAMONA Let’s both be girls. Gideon throws a series of Wushu moves that give him a POWER UP . . T A GIDEON (CONT’D) Yeah. They barely dodge him. his HEALTH BAR increases. Knives KICKS Gideon in the stomach and Scott follows with a PUNCH IN THE NOSE. SCOTT ATTACKS. You’re still my girl. spins and BUTTS Scott in the face with the hilt of the sword. Scott ATTACKS with his sword. takes a hesitant step towards him. Scott ducks. They CLASH in the air. Gideon’s lightning fast sword deflects them. Knives whips off her scarf. Knives throws her knives. Scott leaps in the air. Gideon jumps after him. Ramona knees Gideon in the balls. Scott teeters on the edge of the pyramid. (CONTINUED) B A Gideon gets back to his feet via backflip. He grins.his glasses glow. The swords create an “X”. expecting her to move. Gideon spins low. sending Gideon sliding across the floor. Knives and Ramona. uses it to wrap up Gideon’s sword arm and disarms him. Gideon swings at Scott. Scott SPIES his sword and picks it up just in time to BLOCK Gideon’s attack. Gideon spins again and swings upward. Gideon BLOCKS. Gideon hits her back. Gideon BLOCKS. Knives attacks and scores a hit.

Ramona swings Gideon’s VELVET ROPE. You’re nothing. B A GIDEON (CONT’D) You’re not cool enough for Ramona. she kicks him in the back of the head. Knives and Scott share a look. He looks up at the steely eyed Scott. They Get up and circle Gideon. cancelling out Gideon’s digital sword. From the floor. F GIDEON (CONT’D) Who do you think you are Pilgrim? You think you’re better than me? I’ll tell you what you are. Me? I’m what’s hip. (CONTINUED) . Gideon SLAPS Ramona in the face and sends her painfully tumbling down the pyramid. Scott slides Knives through Gideon’s legs. then upends him like a wheelbarrow and KICKS HIM IN THE FACE. Gideon starts to pixellate quite badly. Gideon lands in front of him and raises his sword for the kill.. COMBO ATTACK! FREEZE FRAME PUNCHES: Knives kicks and Scott punches. sending Gideon back and forth like a pinball: KICK PUNCH KICK PUNCH KICK! Gideon’s face smashes with each impact. A Ramona rises to see Scott and Knives kicking ass. One lens of his glasses cracks.. You’re zero. sending him spinning. I’m what’s happening. Not long now. 99 Scott lands hard. defeated. I’m blowing up right now.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (7) 116A. She lands painfully at the bottom. A pain in my ass. You know how long it took to get all the evil exes’ contact information so I could form this stupid league? Like two hours! T Gideon lands HARD on his knees.

99 SCOTT You’re right.S. Yeah? B A F KIM PINE There goes our deal. STEPHEN STILLS We’re still getting paid. makes her way towards them. KIM PINE There goes our deal.. And you got another thing right. silhouetting Scott and Knives in their kung fu poses. YOUNG NEIL Whoa. his glasses SAILING down the steps of the pyramid. You are blowing up. They share a smile.. Gideon’s head EXPLODES. Ramona. Oh. Right now.. Scott and Knives kiss. RAMONA (O.. I’m not cool enough for Ramona. Then his body follows suit in an almightyPOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!! SHIMMERING COINS rain down. Stills jumps off stage and picks up coins.) You two make a good combo. The coin rain continues. awake now.INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (8) 117. right? Kim points to the falling coins. YOUNG NEIL T A (CONTINUED) . Scott spins and BACK HEELS Gideon in the face. SCOTT RAMONA Yeah.

We actually have a lot in common.. Both take a step forward. They chat amiably. They look expectantly at the entrance.. worried for Scott.. Knives and Ramona. Dark clothes.. 99 The trio walk down the pyramid steps. The glasses GLIMMER. SCOTT No. spotting his EVIL MIRROR IMAGE staring back at him. 100-103 OMITTED 104 100-103 104 EXT. Scott and Negascott face off.. GIDEON’S VOICE echoes.EVENING Knives and Ramona huddle in the snow outside Chaos Theatre. Fringed hair.) You can defeat me. The girls reluctantly exit stage left as Scott walks forward to confront his dark side. We just shot the shit. This is something I have to face on my own. Then. THE WAREHOUSE . Evil face. nothing. Knives and Ramona flank Scott in a fighting stance. GIDEON’S VOICE (O.. KNIVES CHAU What happened? SCOTT Aw. KNIVES CHAU NEGASCOTT walks towards Scott. Scott picks up Gideon’s fallen glasses.but can you defeat. Scott runs his fingers through his hair.S. He’s a super-nice guy. A F T A Negascott! (CONTINUED) . shake hands and part ways. KNIVES CHAU Your hair...INTEGRATED FINAL 99 CONTINUED: (9) 118.yourself? Scott peers into the glimmering lenses. B Scott strolls out with Negascott.. Scott approaches Knives and Ramona.. The glasses dissolve and Scott whips around to face.


. RAMONA I dunno. F T Scott calls after her. SCOTT Yeah? KNIVES CHAU I like it. Ramona sees this and smiles. you know? I came here to get away. Where are you going? Ramona. I should probably disappear. Snow begins to fall. SCOTT Hey. pulling her hood up and walking into the darkness. 104 KNIVES CHAU It’s getting really shaggy. Knives removes the hat from Scott’s head. You do? Scott smiles. though. literally taking his guard down. Steps tentatively away from Knives. SCOTT After all that? Ramona looks at Knives as she says this. SCOTT I think I understand. stops and turns back. B A RAMONA It's hard. SCOTT For what? RAMONA For being the nicest guy I ever dated. A SCOTT (CONTINUED) . then realizes Ramona has gone. hoping to slip away.INTEGRATED FINAL 104 CONTINUED: (2) 119. Ramona straightens his parka tenderly. but the past keeps catching up.. RAMONA I should tahnk you. He turns to see her. Scott’s HAT appears on his head! He looks totally freked. I’m tired of people getting hurt because of me.

S. I’m too cool for you anyway. Guitar still in hand. Knives doesn’t look back.. F KNIVES You earned it. We hear a 2ND COUGH . We hear a COUGH . RAMONA Well. then hearsKNIVES (O. 104 SCOTT That’s kind of sad.Young Neil sidles into frame behind her. She takes his hand briefly. mind if I tag along? B A KNIVES (totally sweet and sad) I’ll be fine. SCOTT Wha? SCOTT But what about you? She grins and kisses his cheek. A (CONTINUED) . but urges Scott toKNIVES Go talk to her. She turns to walk off again. RAMONA (almost laughing) It is kind of sad. T Surprised. KNIVES There’s someone out there for me.. but thenSCOTT (O.) Hey. You’ve been fighting for her all along.INTEGRATED FINAL 104 CONTINUED: (3) 119A..S. Scott turns back to see a smiling Knives. Bye and stuff.. Ramona walks on into the night alone. then lets it drop. Before she’s gone.Nega Scott also sidles into frame.) Go get her. SCOTT Yeah. And stuff. Scott watches.

A We see the door with the star on it. try again? Ramona smiles. can I blow your mind? Scott Pilgrim totally threw down with Gideon Graves at the grand opening of Chaos Theater. winter turning to spring. we hear a lush rendition of ‘Ramona’ swelling and hear whispers of gossip over Toronto’s cell phone airwaves.INTEGRATED FINAL 104 CONTINUED: (4) 119B..) Oh my God...9.. F JULIE (V.. Tilt up to the heavens and reveal the CONTINUE graphic in the stars.1. standing right in the middle of the street. My little brother kicked a guy’s head off..5.. A STACEY (V.. sunrise coming up over Toronto.. Someone seriously should have been filming it.8. it was apparently awesome.... RAMONA You want to come with me? SCOTT (hopeful) I thought maybe we could... CONTINUE? 10. Scott takes it.2..O. snow swirling around it. I mean bananas.O.. It was unbelievable... B Scott and Ramona walk through the door...4. it was a HUGE fight. Literally. She holds out her hand like in the park scene earlier. T Over this magical transformation..7..6. . night magically turning to day. Scott and Ramona walk towards the door.3.) Oh my God. 104 Ramona is flabbergasted to see a cheery Scott walk alongside. Yeah.


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