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SENIOR HIGH SCHOOL

Personal
Development
Quarter 2 – Module 1: Personal
Relationship
(Week 1 – Week 2)
Personal Development – Senior High School
Alternative Delivery Mode
Quarter 2 - Module 1: Personal Relationship
First Edition, 2020

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Published by the Department of Education – Division of Cagayan de Oro


Schools Division Superintendent: Dr. Cherry Mae L. Limbaco, CESO V

Development Team of the Module

Author/s: Shielamar L. Labiscase

Reviewers:

Illustrator and Layout Artist: Shielamar L. Labiscase


Management Team
Chairperson: Cherry Mae L. Limbaco, PhD, CESO V
Schools Division Superintendent

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Senior High School

Personal
Development
Quarter 2 - Module 1: Personal
Relationship
(Week 1 – Week 2)

This instructional material was collaboratively developed and


reviewed by educators from public and private schools, colleges, and
or/universities. We encourage teachers and other education
stakeholders to email their feedback, comments, and
recommendations to the Department of Education at action@
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We value your feedback and recommendations.

Department of Education ● Republic of the Philippines


Introductory Message
This is a very interesting module since the topic is about your
PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP. The concept of relationship is very broad,
complex and varies from person to person. This module will provide
information in understanding the concept in meaningful and easier way.
This aims to introduce the different types of relationships depending on the
nature of interaction.
Researchers have found that relationships are important to a person’s
happiness. The absence of close relationships can produce a deep negative
effect such as feeling worthless, powerless, and alienated. We can say that
every relationship has specific objectives or purpose that a person wishes to
pursue, either because of need, want, or desire. The very first meaningful
relationship every person encounters is with one’s mother. The mother-child
relationship is already established even before birth because of connection.
The other connections a person encounters will be tackled in this module.
This module contains varied activities that can help you build, become
responsible and maintain good relationship to your family, friends and
significant other by identifying the appropriate way of expressing your
attraction, love and commitment to them.
The following are the lessons contained in this module:
1. Personal Relationships
2. Attraction, Love and Commitment
3. Being Responsible in a Relationship

Icons of this Module


This module has the following parts with their corresponding icons:

What I Need to Know This will give you an idea of the skills or
competencies you are expected to learn in
the module.

What I Know This part includes an activity that aims to


check what you already know about the
lesson to take. If you get all the answers
correctly, you may decide to skip this
module.

What’s In This is a brief drill or review to help you link


the current lesson with the previous one.

What’s New In this portion, the new lesson will be


introduced to you in various ways such as a
story, a song, a poem, a problem opener, an
activity or a situation.

What is It This section provides a brief discussion of


the lesson. This aims to help you discover
and understand new concepts and skills.

What’s More This comprises activities for independent


practice to strengthen your understanding
and skills of the topic. You may check the
answers in the exercises using the Answer
Key at the end of the module.

What I Have Learned This includes questions or open-ended


statements to be filled in to process what
you learned from the lesson.

What I Can Do This section provides an activity which will


help you transfer your new knowledge or
skill into real life situations.

Assessment This is a task which aims to evaluate your


level of mastery in achieving the learning
competency.

Additional Activities In this portion, another activity will be given


to you to enrich your knowledge or skill of
the lesson learned. This also develops
retention of learned concepts.

Answer Key This contains answers to all activities in the


module.

At the end of this module you will also find:

References This is a list of all sources used in


developing this module.

How to Learn from this Module


Follow the tips and reminders below to learn from this module.
• Take your time reading the lessons carefully.
• Follow the directions and/or instructions in the activities and
exercises diligently.
• Answer all the given tests and exercises.
What I Need to Know

At the end of this module, you should be able to:


1. Discuss an understanding of teen-age relationships, including the
acceptable and unacceptable expressions of attractions. (ESP-
PD11/12PR-Iii-9.1);
2. Express his/her ways of showing attraction, love, and commitment.
(ESP-PD11/12PR-Iii-9.2);
3. Identify ways to become responsible in a relationship. (ESP-
PD11/12PR-Iii-9.3);

What I Know

Direction: Select the letter of the best answer among the given choices.

1. This refers to the close connections between people, formed by


emotional bonds and interactions.
A. Personal Development B. Intimacy
C. Personal Relationship D. Commitment

2. Which of the following is appropriate to do in expressing your


attraction to your significant other?
A. Kissing B. Smiling at each other
C. Intimate activities D. Invading personal space

3. Which of the following influence the person to get attracted to people


who are geographically closer to them?
A. Physical Attractiveness B. Similarity
C. Proximity D. Reciprocity

4. Which of the following influences the person to get attracted to others


who like them back?
A. Physical Attractiveness B. Similarity
C. Proximity D. Reciprocity

5. It is an act deciding to consistently fulfil and live by agreements made


with another person, entity, or cause, and where the values of integrity
and respect serve as a guide to one’s behaviour and thinking
A. Passion B. Commitment
C. Attraction D. Attachment
6. It is described as the love-struck phase which is part of lust because it
involves focusing our attention to a particular person or desire.
A. Passion B. Commitment
C. Attraction D. Attachment

7. According to Robert Stenberg, it is the type of love that is


characterized by intimate, non-passionate type of love with long term
commitment.
A. Consummate B. Romantic
C. Companionate D. Fatuous

8. According to Robert Stenberg, it is the type of love that is ideal and


complete form of love with intimacy, passion and commitment.
A. Consummate B. Romantic
C. Companionate D. Fatuous

9. It is a type of love named after ancient Greeks that is considered as


the selfless or unconditional love.
A. Philia B. Agape
C. Storge D. Philautia

10. It is a type of love named after ancient Greeks that is considered


having a healthy “self-compassion” love towards one’s self.
A. Philia B. Agape
C. Storge D. Philautia

11. Which of the following Ancient Greek’s types of love is recommended


for your family?
A. Storge, Agape, Philia B. Pragma Eros, Ludus
C. Storge, Eros, Philia D. Storge, Philia, Philautia

12. Which of the following Ancient Greek’s types of love is recommended


for friendship?
A. Storge, Agape, Philia B. Pragma Eros, Ludus
C. Storge, Eros, Philia D. Storge, Philia, Philautia

13. Which of the following is an element of a healthy relationship?


A. One person make all the decisions B. Be disrespectful
C. Trust one another D. You are threatened

14. Which of the following is a good sign of a healthy relationship?


A. You are afraid of your friends temper.
B. Your friend is happy when good things happen to you.
C. Your friend threatens to hurt you
D. You friend makes fun of you.

15. Which of the following is a good sign of an unhealthy relationship?


A. You feel good about yourself when you’re around the other person.
B. There is communication, sharing, and trust.
C. You feel fear in your relationship.
D. You feel safe to share secrets.

Lesson
Personal Relationship
1

What’s In

Pre-historic humans were interacting already through different forms


of behaviour such as smiling, greeting each other, showing love, affection
and loyalty, or hunting food together. These were all necessary for their
survival especially in the group that you were belonged. The primary reason
for the human beings to be belonged is survival.
Today, belongingness still exists since it has many benefits such as
having support system when you need someone to share your sadness,
happiness and other concerns especially for the teenagers. In adolescence
stage, teenagers begin to form a sense of identity that involves shaping
values and setting future goals. They develop social skills and interact with
the people around them. The nurtured relationships with other people help
us to survive. Hence, we need to understand the relationships formed by the
teenagers among the people around them.

What’s New

Activity 1: The People around Me


Draw a rectangle on blank sheet of paper. Connect three more
rectangles as shown below. Lists down the people you have close
connections with and who considered family, friends, or partner. You may
draw or put pictures of them if you want.

FAMILY

PARTNER YOU FRIENDS


(if there’
any)
What Is It

As you have listed all the people in your life right now that you have
close connection, so let us know what this close connection that you have
with them is.

Personal Relationship refers to the association and close connections


between people, formed by emotional bonds and interactions. These bonds
often grow from and are formed by mutual experiences. Teenagers
commonly have relationships with their family, friends and significant other.
The changes in a teen’s physical and cognitive development come with big
changes in their relationship with family and friends. In adolescence stage, a
new understanding of one’s self occurs. This may include independence,
identity and self-esteem.

Family Relationships
Family is defined as “two or more persons who are related by birth,
marriage, or adoption, and who live together as one household.” It includes
siblings and parents who may with you as you grow up, and relatives such
as grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins who you may not see
frequently.
Family bond plays a vital role in person’s well-being since it may form
other kinds of relationships such as friendships and romantic relationships.
Having strong family relationships is ideal although it doesn’t happen
always. There should be love and closeness. Parents and older relatives role
is to guide discipline and support you when needed. Arguments,
disagreements, moments of anger and hurt are normal in a family since you
spend so much time together, and these are short-lived for families still love
and care about each other. There is an increase of arguments and conflicts
with parents when teenagers assert their independence and find their
identity as adult. These shall pass after teenage years.
In some families, there is little physical contact whereas in others, it is
common for family members to express affection by means such as hugging,
kissing on the cheek or forehead, patting the head or tousling the hair,
patting on the back etc. It is common for babies and younger children to be
carried or held.

Friendships
Friends are the people who we are not related to but who we choose to
interact with. They are the people who we trust, respect, care about and feel
that we can confide in and want to spend time with. A friendship is a
reciprocal relationship. Both people must see each other as a friend for it to
exist.
There are different degrees of friendship. You may find that you feel
closer to some friends than others. This is perfectly normal. Some friends,
especially if they have only been known for a short time or are not seen very
often, may not be appropriate to confide in about personal issues or
concerns. You may find that you feel more comfortable and able to confide
in friends whom you have known for longer or spend more time with.
Furthermore, friends who are very close and know each other well are
referred to as “best friends or close friends”. Some people have many
friends, while others may only have one or two. There is no right or wrong
number of friends to have and everyone is different. Good friendships are
mutually respectful, supportive and share common interests and ideas. It
should be built on honesty, support and loyalty.
Some friendships can be close while some friends choose to greet each
other by hugging or kissing on the cheek, other friendships may have no
physical contact, or may simply shake hands. Romantic contact or Being
intimate physically is not appropriate in a friendship.

Romantic Relationships
A romantic relationship is when you feel very strongly attracted to the
other person, both to their personality and, often, also physically and should
be reciprocated by the other person in the relationship. A romantic
relationship exists between a boyfriend and girlfriend (in a heterosexual
relationship) or a boyfriend and boyfriend or girlfriend and girlfriend (in a
homosexual relationship) or spouses (in a marriage) or life partners (in a
civil partnership or long-term unmarried relationship). People in a romantic
relationship often see each other and when apart will find ways to contact
each other by phone and the like. A romantic relationship is the closest form
of relationship in which, the two people who are involved will often describe
themselves as being attracted to each other and/or “in love”. They feel a
strong connection and bond to each other that they do not feel with anyone
else, even close friends. The bond is also exclusive and monogamous.
Arguments and disagreements occur in romantic relationships
sometimes. These arguments can be overcome through effective
communication, understanding and compromise. In other cases, if there are
frequent arguments, the two people involved my decide to end the
relationship. Relationships can be of varying duration. Some relationships
quickly become apparent that the two people involved are not compatible
and do not want to spend their lives together, and so the relationship may
end after only a few months. In other cases, both may be together for many
years or may stay together for the rest of their lives.
Successful romantic relationships are built on love, trust, respect,
support, acceptance, shared interests and a desire for the two people
involved to share their lives together and end with marriage. For teenagers,
various kinds of physical contact are not appropriate. These include
prolonged cuddling and holding, kissing on the lips and sexual intercourse.
Pre- marital sex is unacceptable.
What’s More

Activity 2: My Family, Friends and Significant Other’s Portrait

In silence, think about your family – the members, your friends, and
significant other (if there’s any), their current situations, and the quality of
your relationships with them. In a blank sheet of paper, divide the paper
into three and draw or illustrate the portrait of your family, friends and
significant other (if there’s any). Remember that there is no right or wrong
illustration. Your illustration/ drawing should reflect how you perceive your
family, friends and your partner (if there’s any) and the relationship you
have with them right now. At the back of the paper, answer the following
questions.

Guide Questions:

1. How did you feel when you were creating the portrait of your family?
Friends? Partner (if there’s any)?

2. How easy or difficult was it for you to come up with the drawings/
illustration? What made it easy? What made it difficult?

3. What new things did you realize or discover about your family/
friends/ partner (if there’s any) after making your drawing?

What I Have Learned

Activity 3: Journal Reflection


Use these guide questions to share your thoughts, feelings, and
opinion about your personal relationship.

1. What kind of relationship do you have in your family, friends, or partner


(if there’s any)?

2. What is your role in the relationship?

3. Are you satisfied with the type of relationship that you have with them?

4. Do you believe that your relationship with them can be improved?

5. In what ways can you help to improve your relationship with them?
Lesson Attraction, Love and
2 Commitment

What’s In

Activity 4: The People I am Attracted to

Write down the name of the person/s that best fit for each statement
on the second column and on the third column, elaborate/specify the
reason/s of your attraction similar to the statement given. You can answer
as many as you can.

Example: I am physically attracted to (name of the person) because she has


lovely eyes and beautiful smile.

Statement Name of Reasons


Person/s
1. I like him/her because he/she is
physically attractive.
2. I am attracted to him/her because I
am familiar with him/her and we often
see each other.
3. I am attracted to him/her because we
are alike.
4. I am attracted to him/her because we
have the same feelings or we like each
other.

What’s New

Activity 5: Love Test


Each item is a hypothetical situation that reveals psychological
aspects of you. However, the results are not necessarily true. When
answering a question, do not dwell too much on the item and simply write
your answer that comes in your mind first.
Hypothetical Situation Answer
1. You are walking to your boyfriend's or girlfriend's house.
There are two roads to get there. A straight path that you o Short
will arrive quickly but is very plain and boring. The other is o Long
longer but full of wonderful and interesting sights. Which
path will you choose?
2. On the way, there are two rose bushes which is full of
red roses and the other is full of white. You pick 20 roses
for your loved one. What color combination will you choose?
(Any combination including all one color is fine.
3. You finally get to your boyfriend's or girlfriend's house. A o Do it
family member answers the door. You can ask them to yourself
please get your boyfriend/girlfriend or you can go yourself. o Ask a family
Which do you do? member
4. You go up to your girlfriend's or boyfriend's room, but o Window sill
nobody is there. You can leave the rose. Where will you out o Bed
the roses?
5. Later, it's time for bed. Both of you sleep in separate o Awake
rooms. In the morning, when it is time for both of you to o Asleep
get up, you go into his or her room and check up on them.
When you arrive, is he or she awake or asleep?
6. Now it is time for you to go back home. Do you take the o Short
short but plain and boring road or the longer, sight filled o Long
road?

What Is It

In the biological model of love as proposed by anthropologist Helen


Fisher, love can start with any of these three feelings: lust, attraction and
attachment depending on the person. Each involves different
neurochemicals in your brain.

Three Brain Systems of Love or Stages of Falling in Love

1. Lust refers to an urge or desire that motivates us to partake in sexual


activity.
2. Attraction is described as the love-struck phase. This is the stage when a
person loses sleep and appetite over someone and become excited to
someone while daydreaming of special person. It is part of lust because it
involves focusing our attention to a particular person or desire. Many
factors influence attraction.

Factors of Attraction
a. Physical Attractiveness
It is one of the primary determinants of romantic attraction. Most
people prefer whom they consider physically attractive especially in
the early stages of dating.
b. Proximity
People tend to get attracted to people who are geographically closer to
them. They are more likely to develop feelings of mutual familiarity
with the people who live close to us or go to school with us and
increased level of comfort when there is regular contact and no prior
negative feelings.
c. Similarity
People pick partners who we have similarities with such as social
class, background, religious beliefs, age and education. The more
attitudes and opinions two people share, especially when they are
similar, the more they will want to do the same activities, and would
create a strong bond between them.
d. Reciprocity
People like others who like them back. People feel indebted when
someone does something good for them and tend to reciprocate the
action. The more we are liked by someone they equally like, the more
we behave in ways that promote mutual feelings of liking.

3. Attachment is a deep and enduring emotional bond that connects one


person to another across time and space. It is when long-lasting
commitments are exchanged.

Robert Strenberg (1988) suggests that there are three main


components of love. Love relationships vary and it depends on the presence
or absence of each of these components.

Three Components of Triangular Theory of Love


1. INTIMACY is an intimate interpersonal relationship that involves
physical or emotional intimacy. It is characterized by friendship,
familiarity, or romantic love. It involves closeness, connectedness, and
bondedness.
2. PASSION is an intense emotion, a compelling enthusiasm or desire for
something.
3. COMMITMENT is the attitude of someone who works very hard to do or
support something. It is an act deciding to consistently fulfil and live by
agreements made with another person, entity, or cause, and where the
values of integrity and respect serve as a guide to one’s behaviour and
thinking. The easy ways to express your commitment to your
relationships is to show love and loyalty, respect and appreciate others,
convey honesty and trust, work as a team and compromise, and
disagree agreeably.

The combination of the three (3) components can produce eight (8) types of
love.
Types of Intimac Passion Commitme Example
Love y nt
Nonlove No No No
Liking Yes No No Friendships
Infatuation No Yes No Experiencing love at
first sight or being
obsessed with a person
Empty Love No No Yes Stagnant Relationships
or Arrange marriage
Fatuous No Yes Yes Relationships
motivated by passion
Companionat Yes No Yes Relationships lacking
e passion such as those
between family
members or close
friends
Romantic Yes Yes No Being bonded
emotionally and
physically to another
person
Consummate Yes Yes Yes Complete love

Love occurs not solely between romantic partners only. Humans can
experience different types of love in various relationships, such as with
romantic partners, friends, family and even strangers. Ancient Greeks
studied love and denote each type by giving each one a Greek name. Lee
(1973) offers a theory love styles which are derived from an analysis of
writings about love through centuries.

1. PHILIA – Affectionate Love


It is a love that runs deep in true friendship. Love without romantic
attraction and occurs between friends or family members. It is called
brotherly love when both people share the same values and respect each
other.
Ways to show this love:
 Engage in deep conversation with a friend.
 Exchange beliefs and imperfections with close friends.
 Be open and trustworthy
 Be supportive in difficult times.
2. PRAGMA – Enduring Love
It is a mature love that develops over time. Commitment and efforts are
needed to reach “Pragma”. Instead of “falling in love”, you are “standing
in love” with the partner by your side.

Ways to show this love:


 Continue to strengthen the bond of long-term relationships
 Seek and show effort with your partner.
 Choose to work with your partner forever.

3. STORGE – Familiar love


It is naturally occurring love rooted in parents and children, as well as
best friends. It’s an infinite love built upon acceptance and deep
emotional connection. This love come easily and immediately in parent
and child relationships. It flows between parents and children or
childhood friends.

Ways to show this love:


 Sacrifice your time, self or personal pleasures.
 Quickly forgive harmful actions.
 Share memorable and impactful moments.
 Show gratitude towards the people close to you.

4. EROS – Romantic Love


It is a personal infatuation and physical pleasure. It is a passionate love
displayed through physical affection.

Ways to show this love:


 Admiring someone’s physical body
 Engage in physical touch such as hugging and kissing but it is not
appropriate for you yet.

5. LUDUS –Playful love


Flirting and beginning stages of intimate love. It is a child-like and
flirtatious love found in the beginning. This type of love consists of
teasing, playful motives and laughter between two people.
Ways to show this love:
 Spend time together to laugh and have fun
 Exemplify childlike behaviour together.
6. MANIA –Obsessive Love
Obsessiveness or madness over a love partner is mania. It leads to
unwanted jealousy or possessiveness.
Ways to avoid this love:
 Recognize obsessive or possessive behaviour before acting upon it.
 Focus on yourself more than another person.
 Put trust into your relationships
7. PHILAUTIA –Self Love
It is having a healthy “self-compassion” love towards one’s self.
It is when you recognize your self-worth and don’t ignore your personal
needs. Self-love begins with acknowledging your responsibility for your
well-being.
Ways to avoid this love:
 Respect, accept ad appreciate yourself.
 Create environment that nurtures your well-being.
 Take care of yourself like a parent would care for a child
 Spend time around people who supports you.
8. AGAPE –Selfless Love
It is an empathetic attitude of love for everyone and anyone. It is the
highest love to offer. It is given without any expectations of receiving
anything in return. It is considered as unconditional love.
Ways to avoid this love:
 Dedicate your life to improve the lives of others.
 Stay conscious of your actions for the good of humankind.
 Offer your time and charity to someone in need.
 Express unconditional love in any situation

What’s More

Activity 6: Love Combination


Identify the perfect combination of different theory of love styles that
can create something beautiful on your connection with your family, friends
and significant other. Though there isn’t a perfect equation for every
relationship, these combinations can provide a perspective on how to work
various types of love into your relationships.
Relationship Combination of Types of Love
Family ___________+____________+_____________
Friendship ___________+____________+_____________
Significant Other ___________+____________+_____________

Activity 7: Love Language In The Family


This activity aims to help you realize your love language or the way
you would usually prefer to receive from and give love to your parents,
friends and significant other. You can take the “Love Language Personal
Profile” based on Dr. Gary Cahpman’s The 5 Love Languages using this link
https://bit.ly/3cpjE1H.

If you don’t have internet access, you can actually assess yourself,
your family, friends, and significant others of your love languages.

1. Words of Affirmation
“Actions don’t always speak louder than word”. Unsolicited compliments
mean the world to you. Wanting to hear “I love you” or other positive
compliments you’re your partner. And if you don’t hear it, then you might
feel unloved. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.
You wanted to hear kind and encouraging words that build you up.

2. Acts of Service
Doing nice things for other people and anything you do to ease the burden
of the other person are “acts of service.” Whether it’s changing someone’s oil,
cleaning the house, or giving a back rub, doing things to help make the
other person happy is what this one is about. Helping with homework can
be an expression of love to you. The words you wanted to hear is “Let me do
it for you”.
3. Receiving Gifts
You value giving and receiving gifts and some do not. So, if you measure
your partner’s love by how many gifts you are given, then your love language
is “receiving gifts.” Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the
receiver of the gifts wanted on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind
the gift. A missed birthday or a thoughtless gift would be disastrous.

4. Quality Time
You measure the quality of love by how much time the other people want to
spend with you. If you don’t get enough “together time,” then you might feel
unloved. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there
– with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks standby
makes you feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed activities, or
the failure to listen can be hurtful.
5. Physical Touch
A person whose primary language is physical touch is not very touchy.
Hugs, pats on the back, holding hand and thoughtful touches on the arm
can show excitement, concern, care and love. Physical presence and
accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and
destructive. Appropriate and timely touches communicate warmth, safety
and love to you.

What I Have Learned

Activity 8: Journal Reflection


Upon knowing the results, reflect and write in your journal the following:
1. Using the answer in activity 1, write your love language and the love
languages of your listed family members such as parents and siblings,
friends and significant other.
2. How you can further express your love to them?
3. List down the things on how you wanted to be loved and how you can
share your love to them.

Lesson Being Responsible in a


3 Healthy Relationship

What’s New

ACTIVITY 9: Friendship Stoplight Analogy


Recognize examples of positive and negative behaviors related to
healthy and unhealthy relationships. The purpose of this activity is to
explore relationships using stoplight analogy. Color the circle corresponding
to you answer.

RED – Stop! These are bad sign of relationship.

YELLOW – Caution! These are warning signs of relationship.

GREEN – Go! These are good signs in a friendship!


1. You are afraid of your 11. Your friend threatens to
friend’s temper. hurt you.
2. You enjoy being with this 9. You say that you agree
person but you also enjoy with your friends, even
spending time with other though you really don’t. You
friends. are afraid they won’t be your
friend anymore, if you
disagree.
3. Your friend pressures 10. You rarely get to plan
you to do things you do not what the two of you will do
want to do. together.
4. Your friend tells you not 12. You are nervous that if
to hang out with certain you tell your friend
people. something personal, he/she
will tell other people at
school.
5. You usually feel happy 13. Your friend is happy
when you are with this when good things happen to
person. you and celebrates your
successes..
6. Your friends talks to you 14. Your friends sometimes
about his/her feelings. make fun of you.
7. Your friend criticises you 15. Your friend respects
or people you care about. your feelings and your
opinions.
8. Your friend bullies and
makes fun of other people at
school.

What Is It

The situations given in the previous activity can all be applicable


among your family and significant other or partner. Learn to recognize
examples of people who engage in negative behaviors that lead to unhealthy
relationships. These are some important aspects for healthy relationships.
Important Aspects for Healthy Relationships
Adapted from Woititz, J. , Adult Children of Alcoholics
Mutual Respect Do I treat the other person as if he/she is of value?
Compassion Do I have genuine concern for the issues that cause the
other person concern?
Empathy To what degree am I able to allow myself to be open to
what he/she feels?
Understanding Do I try to understand the other peson, what they say or
do?
Acceptance Can I feel I am okay the way I am? Do I accept him/her as
he/she is?
Honesty Is the relationship built on truthfulness, or are there
games involved?
Trust To what degree am I willing to let the other person know
private aspects of my thoughts, feelings, and life?
Good Can we talk freely about issues that are important to the
Communication relationships?
Do we know how to talk so we each are understood and
sharing is safe?
Consideration Am I mindful of the other person’s needs as well as my
own?
Compatibility To what extent do we like and value the same things?
Mutual In areas of disagreement, are we able to agree or disagree?
Enjoyment
Personal Am I able to maintain my beliefs and sense of self as well
Integrity as offer my time and attention to the relationship?
Vulnerability To what degree can I let down my barriers and allow the
other person to see my perceived weaknesses, without fear
of negative reactions from them?

What’s More

Activity 10: Characteristics of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationships


Divide your paper into two columns and identify healthy and unhealthy
relationships

1. You feel good about yourself when you’re around the other person.
2. You do not try to control each other. There is equal amount of give and
take.
3. You feel sad, angry, scared, or worried.
4. There is communication, sharing and trust. You feel safe to share secrets.
5. You feel that you give more attention to them than they give to you. You
feel controlled.
6. You don’t communicate, share or trust.
7. You like to spend time together but also enjoy doing things apart.
8. You feel pressured to spend time together and you feel guilty when you’re
both apart from each other.
9. You feel the need to be someone that you are not.
10. It’s easy to be yourself when you are with them.
11. You respect each other’s opinion. You listen and try to understand their
point of view even if you don’t always agree with them.
12. You feel the need to be someone that you are not.
13. There is no fear in your relationship.
14. You feel there’s no respect for you or your opinion. You are not able to
disagree.
15. You feel fear in your relationship.

What I Have Learned

1. Personal Relationship refers to the association and close connections


between people, formed by emotional bonds and interactions.
2. Different Types of Relationships: family, friendship, romantic
relationships.
3. Three Brain Systems of Love or Stages: Lust, attraction and
Attachment.
4. Factor of Attraction are physical attractiveness, proximity, similarity,
reciprocity.
5. Three Components of Triangular Theory of Love by Robert Strenberg:
Intimacy, Passion and Commitment
6. The combination of the three (3) components can produce eight (8)
types of love: Nonlove, liking, infatuation, empty love, fatuous,
companionate, romantic consummate
7. Eight love styles name after Greek names:
 PHILIA – Affectionate Love
 PRAGMA – Enduring Love
 STORGE – Familiar love
 EROS – Romantic Love
 LUDUS –Playful love
 MANIA –Obsessive Love
 PHILAUTIA –Self Love
 AGAPE –Selfless Love
8. Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Cahpman
 Words of Affirmation
 Acts of Service
 Receiving Gifts
 Quality Time
 Physical Touch
9. Important aspects to nurture relationship are the following: mutual
respect, compassion, empathy, understanding, acceptance, honesty,
trust, good communication, consideration, compatibility, mutual
enjoyment, personal dignity, vulnerability

What I Can Do

Activity 11: My Reflection


Upon learning to determine the ways to nurture you relationship to
others, reflect and write in your journal the following:
1. Assess your relationship with your family, friends or significant
partner by identifying the things that make it healthy and unhealthy.
2. Write possible ways on how you will change your unhealthy
relationship to them into healthy relationship (if there’s any).
3. What are the things you can possibly do or promise to yourself to
become responsible in maintaining the healthy relationship you have
to other people?

Post-assessment

Direction: Select the letter of the best answer among the given choices.

1. It is an act deciding to consistently fulfil and live by agreements made


with another person, entity, or cause, and where the values of
integrity and respect serve as a guide to one’s behaviour and thinking
A. Passion B. Commitment
C. Attraction D. Attachment

2. It is a type of love named after ancient Greeks that is considered


having a healthy “self-compassion” love towards one’s self.
A. Philia B. Agape
C. Storge D. Philautia

3. Which of the following influence the person to get attracted to people


who are geographically closer to them?
A. Physical Attractiveness B. Similarity
C. Proximity D. Reciprocity

4. Which of the following Ancient Greek’s types of love is recommended


for your family?
A. Storge, Agape, Philia B. Pragma Eros, Ludus
C. Storge, Eros, Philia D. Storge, Philia, Philautia

5. Which of the following influences the person to get attracted to others


who like them back?
A. Physical Attractiveness B. Similarity
C. Proximity D. Reciprocity

6. It is described as the love-struck phase which is part of lust because it


involves focusing our attention to a particular person or desire.
A. Passion B. Commitment
C. Attraction D. Attachment

7. Which of the following is an element of a healthy relationship?


A. One person make all the decisions B. Be disrespectful
C. Trust one another D. You are threatened

8. According to Robert Stenberg, it is the type of love that is


characterized by intimate, non-passionate type of love with long term
commitment.
A. Consummate B. Romantic
C. Companionate D. Fatuous

C. Companionate D. Fatuous

9. It is a type of love named after ancient Greeks that is considered as


the selfless or unconditional love.
A. Philia B. Agape
C. Storge D. Philautia

10. Which of the following Ancient Greek’s types of love is


recommended for friendship?
A. Storge, Agape, Philia B. Pragma Eros, Ludus
C. Storge, Eros, Philia D. Storge, Philia, Philautia

11. According to Robert Stenberg, it is the type of love that is ideal


and complete form of love with intimacy, passion and commitment.
A. Consummate B. Romantic

12. Which of the following is a good sign of an unhealthy


relationship?
A. You feel good about yourself when you’re around the other person.
B. There is communication, sharing, and trust.
C. You feel fear in your relationship.
D. You feel safe to share secrets.
13. Which of the following is a good sign of a healthy relationship?
A. You are afraid of your friends temper.
B. Your friend is happy when good things happen to you.
C. Your friend threatens to hurt you
D. You friend makes fun of you.

14. Which of the following is appropriate to do in expressing your


attraction to your significant other?
A. Kissing B. Smiling at each other
C. Intimate activities D. Invading personal space

15. This refers to the close connections between people, formed by


emotional
bonds and interactions.
A. Personal Development B. Intimacy
C. Personal Relationship D. Commitment

Additional Activities

In a paper, write or make an acrostic poem of the word belo.


R–
E–
L–
A–
T–
I–
O–
N–
S–
H–
I–
P–
ACTIVITY 5 Love Test Analysis
1. The roads signify your attitude towards falling in love.
 Short road - You fall in love quickly and easily.
 Long road - You take your time and do not fall in love easily.
2. The red roses signify how much you expect to give in a relationship while white
roses represent how much you expect in a relationship.
 If you choose all red with one white, he/she gives 90% in the relationship but
expects to receive only 10% back.
3. It illustrates your attitude in handling relationship problems.
 Ask a family member - You may beat around the bush, maybe asking a third
party to intervene. Avoidance of problems runs high.
 Do it myself - You are pretty direct. If there is a problem, you confront it and
deal with it. You want to work it out right away.
4. The placement of the roses indicates how often you'd like to see your
boyfriend/girlfriend.
 Placing the roses on the bed means you need lots of reassurance in the
relationship, and you'd want to see your loved one every day, if possible.
 Placing the roses by the window show that you don't expect or need to see
your loved one too often.
5.
 Finding your boyfriend/ girlfriend asleep: You accept your loved one the way
they are.
 Finding them awake: You expect him/her to change for you.
6. The roads represent how long you stay in love.
 Short road - You fall out of love easily.
 Long road - You tend to stay in love for a long time.
ACTIVITY 6: Love Combination POST-TEST PRE-TEST
FAMILY = Storge + Agape + Philia 1. B 1. C
FRIENDSHIP=Philia + Storge + Philautia 2. D 2. B
SIGNIFICANT OTHER =Pragma +Eros+Ludus 3. C 3. C
4. A 4. D
5. D 5. B
6. C 6. C
7. C 7. C
8. C 8. A
9. B 9. B
10. D 10. D
11. A 11. A
12. C 12. D
13. B 13. C
14. B 14. B
15. C 15. C
Answers Key
ACTIVITY 10: Characteristics of Healthy and Unhealthy Relationship
HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS UNHEALTHY RELATINSHIPS
You feel good about yourself when you’re You feel sad, angry, scared, or worried.
around the other person.
You do not try to control each other. You feel that you give more attention to
There is equal amount of give and take. them than they give to you. You feel
controlled.
There is communication, sharing and You don’t communicate, share or trust.
trust. You feel safe to share secrets.
You like to spend time together but also You feel fear in your relationship.
enjoy doing things apart.
There is no fear in your relationship. You feel the need to be someone that
It’s easy to be yourself when you are with you are not.
them.
You feel there’s no respect for you or your You feel pressured to spend time
opinion. You are not able to disagree. together and you feel guilty when you’re
both apart from each other.
ACTIVITY 9: Stoplight Analogy
RED LIGHT: These are bad signs in a relationship
1. You are afraid of your friend’s temper.
Your friend threatens to hurt you.
Your friend pressures you to do things you do not want to do.
Your friend criticises you or people you care about.
You are nervous that if you tell your friend something personal, he/she will tell other
people at school.
Your friends sometimes make fun of you.
YELLOW LIGHT: These are warning signs in a relationship
Your friend tells you not to hang out with certain people
You say that you agree with your friends, even though you really don’t. You are afraid
they won’t be your friend anymore, if you disagree.
. You rarely get to plan what the two of you will do together.
Your friend is happy when good things happen to you and celebrates your successes.
Your friend bullies and makes fun of other people at school.
GREEN LIGHT: These are good signs in a relationship
You enjoy being with this person but you also enjoy spending time with other friends.
You usually feel happy when you are with this person.
Your friends talks to you about his/her feelings.
Your friend respects your feelings and your opinions.
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For inquiries and feedback, please write or call:

Department of Education – Bureau of Learning Resources (DepEd-BLR)

DepEd Division of Cagayan de Oro City


Office Address: Fr. William F. Masterson Ave Upper Balulang Cagayan de
Oro
Telefax: ((08822)855-0048
E-mail Address: cagayandeoro.city@deped.gov.ph

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