First published by Klaudio Zic Publications, 2011 http://stores.lulu.

com/astrology Copyright © 2011 By Klaudio Zic. All Rights Reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or otherwise, for commercial purposes or otherwise, without the written permission of the Author. The names of dedicated publications are normally given in italics.

Hyenastrology

Copyright © 2011 by Klaudio Zic, all rights reserved.

http://www.lulu.com/astrology

The following treatise will elucidate all the facets of modern astrology. The elaboration is for the premier astrologer who wants to follow the traditional path. (1) Welcome, incipient traditional astrologer. Incipientradition is with you. Incipient tradition is strong in your own family. We all have it. Today is the day to make your first horoscope. No, not as based on any real skies, of course. Any other skies will do. As follows is a step by step instruction of how to ruin many lives by playing on a sympathetic as well as genuinely naïve public that will adore what you have done for them. They will trust you till the end. Keep your lies in well-meant format. Of course that things may not be as we present them, but we have our own way of seeing things: something along that wonderful line of thought. Never mention error. That your client has two to six signs of zodiacal offset in one's horoscope is too rude: make it sound like we have a slightly different point of view: that will sign up with our democratic mentality as endorsed by many.

(2) Mangling the original position of the planets in the form of fake ephemeris will never be your job at all. Don't worry: you will never see any real planetary positions; which are altogether obsolete for the matter at hand; just entrust yours to any system, eastern or western as well. There are namely two types of doing business on this regent's planet: the western way, including the eastern way for double profit. Where do you find double asinine public ready to pay for two versions of their own natal skies of which none is really their own at all? Don't worry: the bigger the distortion, the larger the public: they will come from any double sign, Gemini per instance, or Pisces; being already eager to test your incipient interpretations. People like new things like old stories retold. Nothing is so vintage lie itself. We don't call it lie, of course; as we already settled for tradition. Never call things by their own names. Don't say: here I am, yet another asinine repeater as relaying the same old nonsense that we all know as having no scientific fundament at all. Say, hi, I am your new traditional talent. I will speak of many things that you already heard, in a new way. You are important to me as I am to you, and if a little lie slips here and there, that is because we are all so genuinely human, huh. Being human makes for business even in the crawliest areas of life. When we are all human, we understand ourselves better: no need for understanding as we are all one big community. The collective will cushion all the nonsensei that might slip from your pen. Don't be careful at all when you cut and paste: anything will do. Make it sound revelational. (3) Who does the necessary mangling in order to distort natal skies for a superstitious market? None of your business. Not many people, in fact. You have to know something in order to destroy it. Know where to find the real thing in order to mangle it. Even mangling the real thing requires some skill. So you may say that you are in good hands as expert enough to mangle things left and right. Thus, the planet is served: people asininely

believe in everything set before them, especially when it links with adamant tradition. Give them a set of mangled ephemeris and they are already ready to die for tradition. Which is to say, in mentioning tradition often, you gain credibility. Don't worry: not many will step against it, the devil has a firm foothold on its own planet. (4) Now, choose a house system for your novel horoscope: any of them dozens will do. Remember that you do not need something workable, none of them is, but something eccentric in order to impress thy asinine public with your knowledge. Make it a strange sounding Latin name. Latin is the language of them learned folks. (5) Try and sound knowledgeable on the subject of that planet in the seventh house square all the rest. You perhaps suppose that it is not in the seventh house at all, but since the program set it there, there is no dispute at all. Make that pair divorce on account of planets that were never there. Misplaced planets by sign and house make for an excellent way to ruin other people's lives. Besides, if they do divorce after all, wasn't it as you planned them to? If an organ is cut, even a wrong organ will do; on expert astrological advice, wasn't its sheer fate to be cut, even with your predictions not so sweet? And don't make any, predictions. You don't know how to make anything anyway. Keep it so. (6) Never predict. Any idiot can predict and learn how to predict in minutes, but you are not supposed to. Use no direction. Discard hundreds of techniques. Speak of transits. No astrologer even predicted anything by using that crap, thus it got popular. People intrinsically don't believe that that thing works: follow on popular belief, make it sound stupid, like “retrograde Mercury squares”, etc, etc... Speak of terrible transits from planets that never make any aspect of that kind among themselves. Make everything look orderly. Even when the real planets don't make aspect, make it sound like a terrible truth. No one will check on it anyway, them

astronomers desisted long ago. Astronomers have no idea of the zodiac anyway. Make it sound like you have a complete knowledge of the 360 degrees. Always display an asinine certificate. You paid to tell lies in pubic and be adored as consequence of your great knowledge. Always stress the Age of Aquarius or Pisces or any Age that fits your purpose. Never mention the exact date when that Age sets in. Much as with Sun-signs don't know them, why should your public know them? (7) If all fails – not likely, make use of one of the many little tricks of the trade. Here is one. Assume a special secret aspect between any planets. Make it a strange one, like 108 degrees. You don't know it and neither they do, but such aspects were in fact in great use in Germany. For a special nativity, use a 18 degree aspect. Be ready to always assert with adamant certainty that, ah, yes; the 147 degree aspect, you see, I knew it: here we have the responsible aspect that confirms it all. It had to be the 147 aspect, no other would provoke such an upheaval. (8) When aspects fail, not likely, use some eccentric planet, like Tyche, a Nibiru moon, LILIT VERA, Lamia, Nemesis, Fortuna; even real dwarf planet or centaur, any asteroid will do as well. Comets are especially sought for these days. Make it sound an expert analysis: my friend from Asinine Institute, South Asiniana, has sent me these scans of a new comet: something along that line. Hypothetical planets make for even a greater effect than expensive new ones: precisely because they most probably don't exist, they will always be a matter of cult for humankind. Study the matter at hand, as one finds expert in new planets in every pub. The only ones to have doubts about them are them astronomers: losers in every aspect, people who don't even know what they are looking for.

You are yourself. You are not somebody else. You are your own best horoscope. The best horoscope is you. A single place for your horoscope: you. The best place for your horoscope is within you. The best horoscope for you is your own. You are not somebody else. You are not an imaginary existence. Your life is not a simple chord as strummed upon by any passerby. Your life is not choked by Procrustean models. The best way to start changing futurity is to be informed. You don't want to serve as horoscope for another. You don't want to be somebody else's horoscope for life. You are not the horoscope of someone that never was.

16:22
16:22 stands for the 16 ascendants and 22 zodiacal stations.

16 ?
There are sweet little 16 ascendants rising at east.

22 ?

22 is the total number of the zodiacal constellations of the New Zodiac.

22:16
Tarot fans can easily remember the number of zodiacal constellations, since 22 coincides with the number of the major arcana of the Tarot. Conversely, geomantic 16 is applicable to the court cards of the Tarot.
Klaudio Zic The Academic Zodiac & RTRRT are Copyright © 1981 - 2011 by Klaudio Zic, all rights reserved worldwide. Redistribution of this file in any form is violation of the Copyright Law. This copyrighted material has been previously published as available from http://www.lulu.com/astrology http://dld.bz/RTRRT

NASA JPL ephemeris strip for the winter Sun. 2011-Oct-25 00:00 2011-Oct-28 00:00 2011-Oct-31 00:00 2011-Nov-03 00:00 2011-Nov-06 00:00 2011-Nov-09 00:00 2011-Nov-12 00:00 2011-Nov-15 00:00 2011-Nov-18 00:00 2011-Nov-21 00:00 2011-Nov-24 00:00 2011-Nov-27 00:00 2011-Nov-30 00:00 2011-Dec-03 00:00 2011-Dec-06 00:00 2011-Dec-09 00:00 2011-Dec-12 00:00 2011-Dec-15 00:00 2011-Dec-18 00:00 2011-Dec-21 00:00 2011-Dec-24 00:00 2011-Dec-27 00:00 Vir Vir Vir Lib Lib Lib Lib Lib Lib Lib Sco Sco Sco Oph Oph Oph Oph Oph Oph Sgr Sgr Sgr

So that your planets can learn their place. Text-able and tweet-able info as follows: New Zodiac ~ New Natal Ascendant 16 ascendants 22 zodiacal stations http://dld.bz/new_zodiac 5000 publications http://dld.bz/new_zodiac.qr http://inkmesh.com/search/?pc=10&qs=Academic+Zodiac+RTRRT+Klaudio+Zic #Zodiac 13 signs? No!> #22 zodiacal signs | 12 #ascendants? No!> #16 ascendants http://dld.bz/new_zodiac #fb #astrology #horoscope #tarot

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