Women Advising Women

Though the De Greeks are usually the recipients of unstinted and expensive educations, our thirst for knowledge remains unabated and in some circles it is, indeed, legendary. Material things are as nought to us, we scoff at wealth, we do not seek prosperity and knowledge is everything. Our position has always been to consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls, we De Greeks ask ourselves? Speaking of fowls, Brother Sabu Singh (http://hubpages.com/hub/What-I-Have-LearntFrom-Birds) has covered the subject quite extensively and I shall refer to his superior knowledge in due course. Now in the spirit of this thirst for knowledge, I often visit sites where women are generously offering advice to other women, usually about men. Being an ignorant peasant from Cyprus, I often ask in these fora (not forums as erroneously referred to by those without a basic knowledge of Latin grammar) what I think are relevant questions, but unless I begin my questions with ebullient compliments about the wisdom and intelligence of the authors concerned, I am ignored. My feelings are hurt, as I imagine the tossing of the head that precedes the refusal of the authors to cast their pearls of wisdom in the direction of male swine. Again, this is a classical reference which is due to a liberal education funded by honest toil. So I have decided to plagiarise. I shall put before you questions and answers I have found on the Internet in the hope that all of us might benefit, for the good of human relations and humanity in general. One such specialist published a letter from Gladys, an advice seeking admirer with statements and questions which cannot fail but create scientific interest in those studying the female mind: Gladys says that she has lived with her partner George for 6.5 glorious, loving, wonderful years during which Gladys has had no interest in marriage. Or so she says and here we may choose to believe her or otherwise, depending on our generosity of spirit at the time the question is raised. Though not the marrying kind, three months into their relationship our Gladys decided that he is “The One” but cruised along for all the years under advisement without taking up the matter with George. However, recently realisation has sunk in that all their friends have actually got married and some are even contemplating solid investments for the education of their future

yet when I make a comment on her site she does not deign to honour me (the “u” is deliberate. our expert feels that the sky is the limit and after 1284 words the gist of the advice is. George suddenly began to be unsure about the wisdom of such a drastic commitment after only six-point-five-years of imitation conjugal bliss with Gladys. though. One sees a George who has run out of excuses and apparently a George who tries to come clean by finally telling Gladys clearly (“and honestly”). however. That’s how many words our expert uses in reply. He is confused. Her perseverance is admirable. The independent observer now feels for George. As soon as she broached the subject with George. I call upon Gladys to pay particular attention to the following paragraph and I hope that Brother Sabu Singh shall not begrudge me the quotation: QUOTE The fidelity of the Sarus crane is legendary. reading the text. Regrettably for Gladys. He is not sure. even if the first one was beginning with an “F”. In fact. the Mughal Emperor Jahangir writes of the Sarus' lifelong bond in his opus Jahangirnama. applies to our expert for advice on what to do. with a great deal of computer ink and tears. For this purpose I shall call upon the superior knowledge of Brother Sabu Singh and his world renowned treatise under the all encompassing title “What I Have Learnt From Birds”. one gets the impression that it is at this point that steel has crept into the voice of our Gladys when she addresses George. Though to every single man reading this the situation is crystal clear. the expert also fails to comprehend the clarity of the situation as perceived by all of us here and requires 1284 words to respond. introducing her to newcomers as their spinster friend.grandchildren. and this is verbatim: “You need to seduce this man!” I like Gladys. Here.the brackets are Gladys’s not mine . for the benefit of colonials) with even two words. for some strange reason. so I shall try to illustrate the situation for her in the hope that she will comprehend it as quickly as possible and move on before her friends begin to invite her to the baptisms of their grandchildren. For Gladys. the philosopher George now asks. What is love in the greater scheme of things. Gladys disappointingly does not appear to be able to get the point. On . though misplaced.that George has began to have doubts as to whether he is in love. to grasp the situation and.

We know that the spirituality of the male. I am afraid that your George may have started out as a Sarus Crane and might have remained so for.5 years.the other hand. as you so aptly put it. She is speaking from the position of the woman and she is. One of them finally approves and occupies the nest. My dear Gladys. is directly related to the number of multiple orgasms the male is able to provide the female over the long term and the consistency is a crucial factor in the equation. not all men are as we. but that was under completely different circumstances. celebrities and your girlfriends. And Gladys. some sandpipers and hummingbirds is well known. please listen to the voice of mature male wisdom. We men do not want to listen. as assessed by the female of the species. you poor fish. that the time has come for you to take a leaf out of the female Baya Weaver’s book and start inspecting other potential nests. but when you begin speaking of fashion. Gladys. speaking through her hat. Our pride will not allow us to be enticed by their attractions. The Baya Weaver and its intricate nest tell a fascinating story. in short. when a women speaks of falling in love with the spirituality of a man. no matter how alluring (though in truth we might occasionally make an exception in some particularly promising instances). Gladys. Gladys. When a female expert on relationships tells you to “talk to your man” don’t believe her and do not listen to her. However. We like to discuss literature and daily events. In fact your behaviour to date was more designed to ensure your being taken up the creek. . We frown on female Baya Weavers who wish to inspect our worldly goods before opening their wings to us. and copulation occurs. you have lost us. they were 6. before it is too late. The male builds a nest after which a number of females inspect it. Subsequently the male builds another nest and repeats the exercise with another lot of females UNQUOTE The bold lettering of the last sentence is mine. So I am afraid.5 wonderful years during which you did not insist on this strange proclivity you have recently become a slave to. meaning this mania you have acquired to be taken down the aisle. we know that in this case spirituality is a euphemism in the female mind. before you go. Finally Glady. 6. Gladys. Gladys. we Sarus Crane types look on the Sage Grouse and the Baya Weavers’ of this world with a raised eyebrow and a justifiable feeling of superiority which can only be considered as justifiable by any person of solid Christian morals. to wit. the promiscuity of the sage grouse. Not in the sense that your female experts would have you believe.

Good for George.We note. During this time you were assessing poor George’s spirituality and it seems that our George has come up trumps. . that it took you a test run of three months to decide that poor George is “The One”. Gladys. the new Baya Weaver of the brotherhood of man.