Seventeen-year-old Melissa had been dating Brian for eight
months when he broke up with her- over the phone. The following Monday Melissa sat where she and Brian had eaten lunch together since last September. Her friends sat with her. “I say you’re better off without him,” Amy said. “Yeah,” agreed Crystal. “You guys fought all the time anyway.” “I hear Joy and Nathan just broke up,” offered Julie with an excited smile. “You’ve always had a crush on him, haven’t you?”

Melissa didn’t answer. She lifted her tray and left her friends without a word. They don’t understand, she thought. They’ve all had lots of boyfriends. But Brian was her first real boyfriend, and she had entertained fantasies about marrying him ever since they started dating. When they first started going out, Melissa had made up her mind to be everything Brian wanted. She’d lost a little eight and begun dressing with him in mind. She tried so hard to please him; if he showed the slightest pleasure in s

omething she did or said, she would work to do more of the same. When their relationship became more physically intimate, she determined to give Brian anything, everything; they began having sex after six months as a couple. When Brian broke up with her, Melissa couldn’t believe it. She cried and begged him not to leave her. She told him she’d change; she’d do anything he wanted. But he refused. Her first reaction was anger. After all I’ve done to make him happy, she thought. Then her anger turn inward. I did everything I know how to do, and it still wasn’t enough. I must be totally worthless. I’ll never have a man love me. I don’t deserve to have a man love me. Over the next few weeks, Melissa started spending more time alone in her room. She seldom went out with her friends, preferring instead to stay home, listen to music, and stare at the bedroom walls. She found it difficult to eat, and after a few weeks of having trouble getting to sleep, she began to miss school frequently, and her grades plummeted. When her parents confronted her about her conduct, she shrugged, “ I don’t care” was her only response.

All of us may experience depression at one point in time and this is just a normal reaction to a particular event such as death of a loved one or losing a job. suffered from this affliction. King David. wrote of conflict an experiences with his parents as influencing his development of depression. the author and a modern suffere of depressive disorder. In the 19th century.“I don’t understand. John Cheever.” her mother told the pastor of their church. as well as Job. which literally means black bile.” THE PROBLEM OF DEPRESSION Simply stated. and already affects our daily functions. In the Bible. In the first half of the 20th century. it is a feeling of sadness. depression was seen as an inherited weakness of temperament. “she seems like she’s totally different girl she was. Fruid linked the development of depression to guilt and conflict. Depressive disorders have been with mankind since the beginning of recorded history. . It becomes abnormal when it is excessive. Defenitions of depression may vary from one culture to another. profound and prolonged. Hippocrates reffered to depression as melancholia.

Once thought to be singularly adult problem. such as in: . “Researchers and clinicians now concede that depression frequently occurs in children (Evan. This is partly because people use the term depression to refer to different things: a general sadness. Reams.” While it is difficult to measure how many teens suffer depression. Reinhart & Succop.1982b). Even mental health professionals have struggled for years to devise a clear definition. 1982.and preteens. depression is a regular state for many teens. 1984. Teri. Seigel & Griffin. French & Berbin. 1980. “Nearly 5 percent of all teens are identified as clinically depressed every year. & Jacobs. Depression defines n many ways. 1982a. 1979 ) and adolescents (Friedrich. “the findings suggest that a substantial proportion of young people are suffering from strong feelings of unhappiness and despair.” It is a complex and dangerous condition that often seems to defy description and definition.” humiliation following failure. “the blues. or a period of stress and emotional volatility.” One source states.

shares some helpful unip olar bipol ar depres sions . inactivity. feelings of dejection and hopelessness. is the most common emotional illness of our day. It is like a deep. and sometimes suicidal tendencies.” Gregory Richards state that depression. dark pit from which there is no escape. Second illness) ary depres sions Psychiatrist John White.Webster’s Tenth Collegiate Dictionary defines depression as “a state of feeling sad” but adds a second definition: “ a psychoneurotic or psychotic disorder marked specially by sadness. a significant increase or decrease in appetite and time spent sleeping. It is more than “the blues”.” Wikipedia Dictionary defines depression as “a state of low mood and aversion to activity that can affect a person’s thoughts. It is a later response that comes as a result of accepting harsh reality. Depressive (affective clarification of the forms depression takes in the following chart. anger. loss. feelings and physical-being. in his book The Masks of Melancholy. difficulty in thinking and concentration. It is a mood disorder which feelings of sadness. It is an emotionally handiccapping condition that renders life meaningless. or frustration interfere with everyday life for an extended period of Primary time. behavior.

but . such as alcoholism. Primary depressions.From The Mask Melancholy by John White. White says.” Primary Depressions can also be categorized in two ways: bipolar and unipolar depressions. Secondary depressions occur in the course of some other illness and condition. Sometimes. bipolar disorders involve cycles of mood that include at least one episode of mania or hypomania and may include episodes of depression as well. the mood switches are dramatic and rapid. encompassses a group of mood disorders that were formerly called manis-depressive illness or manic depression. Bipolar depression. Bipolar disorders are often chronic and recurring. These conditions show a particular pattern of inheritance. Not nearly as common as the other types of depressive dosorders. “ are mood disorders which may are not associated with any other form of mental or physical illness. Depressive illness is two kinds: Primary depressions or Secondary Depressions.

” Adolescent depression. a lack of interest in activities normally enjoyed. It is also a plunge into emotional darkness relieve(if at all) only by restoration to normal moods. fatigue. Few professionals even can pick up depression in this state. feelings of worthlessness and guilt. “all of these conditions must last at least a month. changes in weight and sleep. as opposed to that experienced and displayed by adults. difficulty in concentrating and thoughts of death and suicide. a mood disorder characterized by a depressed mood. “To merit the description of depressive illness. in daydreams. and usually last much longer [sometimes years]. For example. by contrast. Mild teenage depression is manifested in fantasies.most often they are gradual. Ross Campbell writes: Teenage depression is difficult to identify because its symptoms are different from the classical symptoms of adult depression.” White says. Unipolar depression. Dr. a teenage in mild depression acts and talks normally. or in dream during sleep. can be even more difficult to categorize and identify. . There are no outward signs of depression. Mild depression is detectable only by somehow knowing the child’s thought pattern and thought content.

. the teenager acts and talks normally. This is often called smiling depression. and crises. we may be able to identify depression. only in severe depression does the teenager actually appear depressed… there is an exception to this. If we are able to see our teenagers at times when they believe no one is looking at them. however. also. such as premenstrual syndrome (PMS) in girls. Adolescent depression can also be hard to recognize because it can be often mistaken for or accompanied by other things. morbid problems. This is a front which teenagers employ unconsciously … primarily when other people are around. When depressed teenagers are alone. they can cover it by appearing OK even when they are absolutely miserable. Teenage depression is difficult to identify because teens are good at “masking” it. they let down or relax the mask somewhat. the content of the teenager’s speech is affected. the teenager’s depression may go unnoticed… In the vast majority of cases. dwelling primarily on depressing subjects such as death. Since many adults today seem to dwell on pessimistic trains of thought. This is helpful to parents. that is. in moderate depression.In moderate depression. However.

diagnose. experience a change in their weight. A lot of researhes have been done over the past decades especially on the biological component/etiology of depression to distinguish this illness as a distinct entity. and they are more likely to complete suicide than their younger counterparts when depressed.Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS) refers to a varied group of physical and psychological symptoms. They may also take more risks. acne increases the risks of depression in teens. a wealth of information through evidenced based medicine has been gathered to define. and depression that occurs 2 to 7 days before the onset of menstruation and cease shortly after menses begins. MYTHS ABOUT DEPRESSION A. Generally a condition in adolescents. breast tenderness. teens might lose interest in activities they formerly enjoyed. including abdominal bloating. Over the years. headache. and treat depression and other psychiatric disorders. . Depression as well as other psychiatric disorders remain trivial. and start abusing substances. irritability. fatigue. show less concern for their safety. In addition to becoming more irritable. anxiety.

All induviduals of whatever personality type can and do become depressed under appropriate circumstances. Untreated depression last from 6 to 13 months with some episodes lasting more than two years.B. Depression will go away on its own and needs no treatment. As the course of the disorder progresses. D. C. no single personality trait or type uniquely predisposes a person to depression. Of these. Depression is a result of a character weakness.” The etiology of major depression revolve around several areas such as biological. genetic. patients tend to have more frequent episodes that last longer and are more resistant to treatment. and psychosocial factors. Depression is caused by “bad spirits. the biological factors specifically those involving altered neurochemistry is the most consistent. On the other hand. Aside from the cause of depression being unknown. most patient undergoing treatment have episodes lasting less than 3 months. This carries a significant amount of morbidity to patient. No study has proven or even shown associations of “bad spirits” witchcraft with depression. . relatives and society in general.

the elderly. People with developmental disabilities do not get depressed. teens. People who tell someone thay are thinking about committing suicide are only trying to get attention and would never do it. it will go away. it will go away.The following are the myths about depression and its treatment : • • • • • • • • • • • It is a weakness rather than an illness. High intelligent or highly accomplished people do not depressed. Children. or men do not get depressed. If the sufferer just tries hard enough. Depression cannot look like (present as) irritability. There are ethnic groups for whom depression does not occur. • People with depression cannot have mental or medical condition at the same time. especially of they have talked about it before. If you ignore depression in yourself or a loved one. People with depression are “crazy.” Depression does not really exist. .

Apparently. The investigators found that those with the illness have a somewhat different genetic makeup than those who do not become ill. not everybody with the genetic makeup that causes vulnerability to bipolar disorder will develop the illness. especially with bipolar disorder.• • • Psychiatric medications are never necesarry to treat depression. THE CAUSES OF DEPRESSION Some types of depression run in families. Families in which members of each generation develop bipolar disorder have been studied. That is. Children and teens should never be given antidepressant medication. This seems to be the case. indicating that a biological vulnerability to depression can be inherited. possibly a stressful environment. additional factors. Medication is the only effective treatment for depression. are involved in its onset and protective factors are involved in its prevention. Major depression also seems to occur in generation after generation in some . However. the reverse is not true.

For example. Keith Olson. Stressors that contribute to the developmentof depression sometimes affect some groups more than others. Socioeconomicallydesadvantaged groups have higher rates of depression compared to their advantaged counterparts. Indeed. difficult relationship.” . Immigrants to the United States may be more vulnerable to developing depression. chronic illness. “Since teenagers are in transition between childhood and adulthood. An external event often seems to initiate an episode of depression. although not as strongly as in bipolar I or II. “ it is not surprising that… many adolescents’ depression relates to developmental struggles. major depression can also occur in people who have no amily history depression. probably more normal during this developmental stage than at any other (except perhaps old age). a serious loss. and environmental factors is involved in the onset of a depressive disorder.” writes Dr. Thus. G. Very often. or any unwelcome change in life patterns can trigger a depressive a depressive episode. psychological. particularly when isolated by language.families. … Some depression in adolescence is quite normal. minority groups who more often feel impacted by discrimination are disproportionately represented. a combination of genetics. financial problem.

depression can be extremely complex. parental rejection. Donald P. abuse. BIOLOGICAL FACTORS Family history. Biological factors.” Depressions sometimes run in families. that it is self-pity. “the risk of depression is 20 percent for women and 10 percent for men. is one of the strongest of the potential causes of depression. or genetics. In fact. not to be responsible for your own happiness. MD. the author of Breaking Through Depression says. and the risk is doubled if one of your parents suffered from depression.I’ve read that depression is an excuse not to grow up. negative thinking. your own risk of depression almost double. ambivalence. Hall. Studies of families with several generations of bipolar disorder (BPD) found that those who develop the disorder have differences in their genes from most that don’t . This seems to be especially true for bipolar disorder. ant the causes may be numerous and varied. Researchers believe that it is possible to inherit a tendency to get depression. life stress. and guilt are among the causes that may prompt teens. Still. recent research indicates that if one of your parents has had depression. anger.

Collins writes. Depression often has a physical basis. Other research has linked depression to brain chemistry that often can . like neurochemical malfunctioning. Other physical influences. There is evidence that that depression runs in families and may have a genetic basis. research reports are sometimes contradictory. or glandular disorders. Thousands of women experience depression as part of a monthly premenstrual syndrome (PMS) and some are victimized by postpartum depression following childbirth.develop BPD. are more complicated creators of depression. Major depression also run in families. This is difficult to demonstrate conclusively. At the simplest level. or improper diet can all create depression. physical illnesses. but it can also develop in people who have no family history of depression. brain tumors. insufficient exercise. the side effects of drugs. we know that lack of sleep. Either way major depressive disorder is often associated with changes in brain structures or brain functions.

coexistence of two opposing drives. or emotions toward the same person. A common example of ambivalence is the feeling of both love and hate for a person. Stated another way. ambivalence is the experience of having thoughts and emotions of both positive and negative valence toward someone or something. The term also refers to situations where “mixed feelings” of a more general sort are . AMBIVALENCE Ambivalence is a state of having simultaneous. feelings. object. conflicting feelings toward a person or thing. or altered by antidepressive drugs. desires.

that there is nothing we can do to relieve suffering. reach a goal or bring change. Tim LaHaye writes: Some psychiatrists. or to deliberate attempts to resolve the ambivalence. like Dr. This state can lead to avoidance or procrastination. people experience less discomfort even when feeling ambivalent. or where a person experiences uncertainty or indecisiveness concerning something. being unable to remedy an intolerable situation. . Ambivalence is experienced as psychologically unpleasant when the positive and negative aspects of a subject are both present in a person’s mind at the same time. When the decision to be made. The expressions “cold feet” and “sitting on the fence” are often used to describe the feeling of ambivalence. then depression is a common response.” Collins refers to this as “learned helplessness. “ When we learn that our actions are futile no matter how hard we try. consider ambivalence “the most common precipitative cause of depression.” He defines ambivalence as “ the sense of being trapped.” and says. that is.experienced. Ostow.

” Their finding agreed with earlier studies (Brown and Harris . They also remember less family togetherness (Paloutzian & Ellison. 1978. belitting. shamming.1982). Mahon . James J.It comes when we feel helpless and give up trying. Ponzetti Jr. according to a study they conducted. Brown et al.” PARENTAL REJECTION Researchers Joan Robertson and Ronald Simons reported that. with low self-esteem showing a strong relationship with depression. writes : Depressed students recall poorer relationships with their parents and childhood friends. 1986) that found that young people who experience depression..are likely to struggle with the adolescent task of reevaluating themselves and their place in the world. Young people who were raised in a family environment of excessive parental criticism. “Perceived parental rejection was significantly associated with both depression and low self-esteem. A number of studies suggest that family background is a crucial factor in a young person’s vulnerability to depression.or of neglect and inattention.

and her parents never missed a game. in fact. They met through the church youth group. They seldom missed a practice. They seemed to take an intense interest in . They were both sophomores in high school. They had so much in common. and both were good students (though Debbie usually earned better grades than Mark). Debbie didn’t understand. Both were sixteen years old when they began dating. But not everything.(1982) and Hecht and Baum (1984) noted significant corellations between depression and disrupted patterns of attachment suggesting that the lack of bonding early in life may contribute to the experience of depression.and more. both had been raised in the same town. When he won the trophy as the most valuable player for the district champinoships. Let me tell you a story : Mark and Debbie were both professing Christians. He didn’t scan the faces in the crowd to find his parents because he knew they wouldn’t be there. he smile hugely and strode to the center court to accept the trophy with a swagger that communicated his sense that he thought he deserved the award. They never were. Mark was the star basketball player of his high school team and was named to the alldistrict team. She played on the field hockey team.

or medical attention. school attendance. Neglecting is also considered as parental rejection. supervision. food. clothing. not so easily documented. medical attention. though. But most mornings. is when a child is physically harmed or dies from lack nutrition. Many pastors and youth pastors consider disinterest and uninvolvement on the part of .everything she did. and his mom was an obstetrician. they were highly respected in the community. Neglect can appear in many forms and at different levels of severity. etc. of course. But some youth suffer a type of neglect that is not so readily recognized. It wasn’t just Mark’s sport events that his parents missed. Most authorities consider neglect to be inattention to the basic needs of a child or young person (that is shelter.) The most severe form of neglect. His dad was a bussinessman who treaveled a lot. Mark left for school without seeing his parents and usually scrounged in the kitchen to make his own dinner. Mark sometimes commented to his youth pastor that he could probably die and his parents wouldn’t discover the body until it began to stink up in the house.

” and 30 percent of those leaders rated the situation of inattentive parents of teens as a “crisis”. She doesn’t have any time to attend some school activities which involve parents such as foundation day. She can’t even help me to do my assignments. A young person whose parents seem unconcerned inattentive is likely to experience hurt. frustration. I just want to testify my own experience about this matter: I’m an only child. A teen that is hurting because of parental indifference or inattentiveness is likely to be in desperate need of an adult who will show interest and offer support. family day. to make the story short. particularly if the adult responds to the youth’s need. etc. such care and concern will never replace the attention the youth desires from Mom and Dad. but it can certainly help.the parents a major problem for young people. My mom became busy working just to fulfill the obligation of my Dad to me as the provider. Seventy percent of the national youth leaders surveyed rated the problem of inattentive parents as “very important. anger. . as wells as feelings of insecurity and loneliness. So. I can say that she never failed to give me what want materially. (sometimes resulting in bitterness or rage). But inspite of that. My Dad passed away when I was still 4 years old.

In my desperate time. I am the only one who could love and accept me for who I am. like any other children does to their parents. I bacame desperate that even I thought of suiciding. until wihout even noticing. and to those old people. She’s telling me she’s tired. At first.that those annoyances disappear and turn into love. They left me hanging without even noticing it. she does nothing but to give me a sermon. I can’t explain what she did that soften my heart. I seek attention and love to those people who surround me. To my teachers. what I did is. They all leaved me. Every time I try to show my sweetness to my mom. God sent me a very special woman. My mind was set that no one could loved me. Until suct time. friends. I’m really annoyed at her. She came in the darkest part of my life. They kept telling me they love me but they don’t show me through their actions. she always refuses. Then it came that I give up. All I know is that she made me feel that I’m precious and other people can loved me for who I am. She maturely . mom became inattentive to me. But all of these are only nothing but just temporary. that it comes to the point that I’m seeking a mother’s love and care which she can’t give me.

she always give me her time by listening to my burdens and consoling me. ABUSE K. every time I’m sad. . They concluded that “severity of abuse was the single most powerful predictor of selfesteem. which my mom had never did. Sometimes she attend my school activities which involve parents. Just as what the usually mother does. which my mom never done before. sexual abuse and nonsexual abuse. depression and negative behavior in incest victims. she made me feel as if. She even support me financially.” There is two type of abuse. which my mom can’t give me. She even made an effort to brought me to a doctor to consult for my health condition.understand me when I am on my immaturity mode. And that very special woman I’m telling you about is my beloved Nanay Aleli and I owe her a lot. Though she’s not my real mom. Brent Morrow and Gwendolyn T. She fulfilled my longingness for a mother’s care. Sorell are among those researchers who have traced a connection between depression and abuse – particularly physical and sexual abuse. I was hers.

Sexual abuse is commonly defined as “any form of sexual contact or conversation in which [a] child is sexually exploited for the purpose of bringing sexual gratification to the exploiter. such as: • • • • • • • • • • An adult showing a child his or her genitals An adult asking a child to undress to be looked and fondled. from exposure to actual intercourse . An adult having a child touch his or her genitals. Anal penetration Intercourse Use of children for the production of pornographic materials. An adult touching a child’s genitals. A nineteen-year-old uncle who lived close by. I heard a case about a girl who was sexually abused : It began when Mona was six years old. Forced masturbation Penetration of the anus or vagina with fingers of another object.” It is a term that covers a broad range of actions and activities. . Oral-genital contact.

Mona began to dread contact with her uncle and even began to hate him. Over the next several years. She bagan having nightmares and started to withdraw into an emotional shell. Then one day. for rides in his car. charging her to keep their “little secret”. He bagan to fondle her and kiss her. and eventually he induced her to fondle him. She didn’t know if her mother disbelieved her. but he promised to never hurt her. she had few friends at school or at church. her uncle suggested they go out to the barn to play. He offered to show her a secret and exposed himself to her. when they arrived at Mona’s house to find her parents gone. but their move didn’t end her problems. but his abuse did have an effect. Mona’s family moved away from that uncle when she was nine. but her efforts only resulted in confussion. things develop gradually.She even tried once to tell her mother what was going on. and she . or blamed her for what was happening. to friend’s houses. and to an occasional movie in town. By the time she entered her teens. He never became violent.who was like a big brother to her. Mona knew something wasn’t right about the things her uncle was doing. would often take Mona with him when he went places. From that time on. misunderstood her. and Mona kept their secret.

Finkelhor’s study of 530 women found that 14 percent reported intarfamilial sexual abuse (by a family member) before the age of eighteen. Her newfound “popularity” was unrewarding however. if a father… undress and masturbates in the front of [his daughter].” she said. he’s creating psychic and emotional pressure in the girl. conducted by David Finkelhor (1978) and Diana Russell (1983) reported the incidence of sexual abuse of children and youth. I didn’t feel like I had anything left to give away. a mental health counselor in Massachusetts. Russell’s study of 930 randomly selected women in San Francisco revealed that 16 percent had experienced . she bega to date –slowly at first. “Within a family.” Two landmark studies. there can be incidents that I would label [abuse] even though they don’t involve actual contact. “For example.” says Emily Page. “I felt like I could never be loved.wrestled with severe depression at times. and 19 percent reported extrafamilial abuse (abuse by a non-family member). It wasn’t like I was giving myself away in exchange for love. “Atleast not the way I wanted. When she was fifteen.and soon had become sexually involved with several boys at school.” Sexual abuse does not always involved physical harm or even physical contact.

. Jill couldn’t stand it and finally told her teacher. She was denied a request to live with me and placed under psychiatric care. the stepfather said Jill had lied. my sister’s daughter. Jill’s mother believed her husband.” Otherwise who would support them and her younger brothers? Jill tried to stick to her story. The father could go to jail. but with persistent pressure and increased guilt at depriving the family support. she pleaded with her daughter to “confess. is fourteen.intrafamilial abuse and 31 percent had been victims of extrafamilial abuse. who said that either the child was lying and very sick or the family was in great trouble. When confronted. The teacher told the school psychologist.” as illustrated in the following account: Jill. Her stepfather has been [molesting her] and going into her bedroom at night for the past six months. tragedy that is often exacerbated by the fact that sexual abuse of children may be “the most muted crime. Such statistics reflect unimaginable tragedy. I know she’s telling the truth because she did the same thing to me when I lived with them. she finally “confessed” that she lied. Wringing her hands.

99 million in 1993. forty-five reports for every thousand children. Nonsexual Abuse is a kind of abuse that doesn’t involve sexual intercourse such as : physical abuse. . however. An estimated 1. and 43 percent of those deaths occurred in families that had previously been reported to child protection agencies. Taking children and youth out of the home isn’t always the answer. Many more go unreported. verbal abuse. head of the Department of Research at New York University’s School of Social Work. a study by Trudy Festinger.Such experiences can be extremely damaging to a child or young person and may impose effects that are far-reaching and long-lasting. The number of child-abuse reports reached 2. And the ACLU’s Children’s Project estimates that a child in the care of the state is ten times more likely to be abused than those in the care of their parents.299 children died as the result of neglect or abuse in 1993. Over one million cases were verified. emotional abuse. revealed that 28 percent of children who are placed in foster care suffer some form of abuse while in the system. A case of child abuse or neglect is reported every ten seconds in the United States.

but any act that leave bruises. Violent shaking or slapping. Author Angela R. kicking and punching are all forms of physical abuse. . Burning a child with a lighted cigarette or match is also abuse. belittling. cuts. or rejecting a child. as are physical acts designed to cause harm or humiliation. or welts are certainly abusive. mental. shoving. Carl defines child abuse as: … specific acts of commission or omission by parents or other adults… that lead to non-accidental harm or threatened harm to a child’s physical. or demanding that a child assume responsibilities that he is incapable of handling. scars. Not all abuse is physical however. Tying a young person up or locking him or her in a closet are abusive behaviors. or emotional developmental state.Abuse may take many forms. Physical Abuse includes all acts that create injury or substantial and unnecessary risks of injury. verbally attacking. Not all physical contact or corporal punishment is abusive. Emotional Abuse is defined by Carl as: … a pattern of blaming .

Nearly half (47 percent) of verified abuse cases are cases of neglect. For some parents. or shame a child or young person.Emotional Abuse is generally more difficult to identify and to prove. It can even include jokes or things said in jest. Carl defines neglect as failure to provide: . though. considered by experts to be the most common single form of abuse. It includes words or attitudes intended to provoke. It includes verbal abuse such as screaming. “Most parents are guilty of some emotionally abusive behaviors at one time or another. or name-calling. emotional maltreatment of their children becomes a pattern of life as opposed to an occasional frustrated outburst followed by an apology and expression of love. (Fifty-five percent are due to physical abuse. disgrace. “and a certain amount of emotional abuse s accepted by society.” says Carl. 5 percent to both. It includes slamming doors and throwing things. and 40 percent of deaths due to abuse are due to neglect.) Neglect is the failure of a parent or other caretaker to make adequate provision for a child’s needs and well-being. but it is nonetheless abuse and no less harmful because it is less recognizable. insulting.” Neglect I another form of abuse.

Parents who knowingly allow their children to be placed in danger. wear soiled or torn clothing. Parents who leave young children unattended are guilty of neglect. All children skip meals. medical care.are guilty of neglect. and supervision. But neglect involves a chronic inattention to the basic needs of a child. and experience accidents that might have been prevented by parents from time to time. Whatever form of abuse may take. it must be treated seriously and responded to sensitivity. are guilty of neglect. clothing. failing to express interest and love. Parents who ignore their children. LIFE STRESS The word `stress` is defined by the Oxford Dictionary as "a state of affair involving demand on physical or . Parents who do not ensure their children’s attendance at school or who allow severe illness to go untreated are guilty of neglect.with an abusive family member. for example. go to school with runny noses. education. shelter.…even a bare minimum degree of care in providing food.

psychologists say. divorce. nonetheless. one possible reaction is depression. A condition or circumstance (not always adverse). are detrimental to human health but in moderation stress’s normal and. is synonymous with negative conditions. Stress. or death of a parent. unwanted pregnancy or . we come face to face with numerous causes of stress and the symptoms of anxiety and depression. “When a person encounters stressful events in life that feel over-powering or threatening. in many cases. family discord. Numerous researchers and authors cite stress as a pivotal factor in depression. A `stress` condition seems `relative` in nature. Today. parental separation. Extreme stress conditions. which can disturb the normal physiological and psychological functioning of an individual. This demand on mind-body occurs when it tries to cope with incessant changes in life. In medical parlance `stress` is defined as a perturbation of the body’s homeostasis. proves useful.mental energy". with the rapid diversification of human activity. Such events in the life of a teen may include the rupture of an intense relationship with a peer.” writes Olson.

” ANGER A young person who has not learned or devised ways of effectively handling and expressing anger is more likely to struggle with depressive illness. academic failure. and any event which lowers the teenager’s self-esteem such as expulsion from school. or at his or her own helplessness. or at an abusive parent. depression is described as anger turned inward. They are often intensely angry. If he or she has been taught (by his . Doctor Minirth and Meier write: Over and over in the literature on the subject. or not being invited to popular social events. in the voice.abortion. but usually they do not recognize their anger. failure to make a team . In the vast majority of cases. and in the gestures of the depressed individuals. A young person may be angry at a friend or loved one who has died. anger is very apparent in the facial expressions.

coming and going quickly. Psychology Gary Collins writes: [Anger] occurs in varying degrees of intensity. It can be a short duration. and .” writes Dr. unforgiveness or revenge … Anger. at other times it comes as a surprise and shock to everyone. openly expressed. church. the youth may repress anger rather than resolving it. “Sometimes its occurrence is understandable and predictable. is at the basis of a host of psychology. G. including the angry individuals themselves.” While extreme mood swings and emotional instability are a natural part of the teen years. or unconsciously expressed .) that anger is always bad. deliberately hidden from others. teachers.from mild annoyance to violent rage … It may be hidden and held inward or expressed openly. temper outbursts and aggressive behavior can be signs that a young person’s anger has reached unhealthy proportions and is not being handled appropriately. physical.parents. “Anger is a very commonly experienced and displayed emotion during adolescence. or it may persist for decades in the form of aggression. Keith Olson. etc.

Nonverbal expressions of anger can include a stern look. or let go. then he feels no obligation to deal with his anger. The problem is solved (temporarily). By repressing it. If a person denies that he is angry.spiritual problems. But when anger is released. People can gain the ability to release anger only . Dr. ignoring someone. Naturally this is a dangerous method of handling anger. crying. Released anger refers to anger that is dismissed. or giving a cold glare. Repressed anger is simply pushed into subconscious mind. There it can fester and worsen without that person’s knowledge… [Expression is another way people handle anger.] Anger is not always expressed verbally. the person has made a conscious decision that anger is no longer needed and it is therefore dropped. Les Carter outlines three general Repression is a form of denial. It is not confused with repressed anger. but in the long run repressed anger is usually especially powerful and bitter. It can be expressed through behavior. Well over half of all communication is done through nonverbal means. a person is pushing anger from the conscious to the subconscious. Repression may have its short-term rewards. a slam of a door.

He turned and watch frm the bus stop as his father raced toward him with Andrew’s coat in his hand. one winter morning. and he hit the ground hard. . The problem many teens and preteens face is that they to repress their anger (particularly if their parents or churches have taught them that anger is always bad) or they have never learned how to express it in appropriate ways. his head making a loud cracking noise as it hit the sidewalk. of course. bitterness . Moment later. As a result. Andrew’s dad crossed an icy patch on the sidewalk. his feet flew out from underneat him. slander. His mother called after him. or other forms of malice. he left the house to catch the school bus … without his coat.after they first gain some mastery of the art of expressing anger. GUILT A story of Andrew : Andrew was seven when. rage. And. very few young people (or adults) have learned how to release anger when is warranted. and anger build up until they explode in brawling. but Andrew could see the school bus coming up the road and didn’t want to miss it.

At ten. At fifteen he tried to take his life. Andrew. that he had been consumed with guilt for most of his life because he blamed himself for his father’s death.His dad’s injuries from the fall were severe. She knew her teenage son was suffering deeply. After his father’s accident. guilt arises . became dull and morose. after attending a counselling with her son. a formerly bright and cheerful kid. At thirteen. It was not difficult to understand why guilt can lead to depression. he was nearly killed when he stepped into the path of a car on the street in front of his house. due to complications arising from his fall. Andrew’s mother had grieved for years over her husband’s death and even no longer over the change she had witnessed in her son. he began suffering from extended bouts of severe depression. he died eleven days later. It came as a total shock to her when she discovered. When a person feels that he or she has failed or has done something wrong. and he was rushed to the hospital where. but she couldn’t understand why.

Olson writes: Suicide is often the individual’s own attempt to take control of punishment of sins or other misdeed of which he or she feels guilty. Olson . When no punishment has been received frrom society. Like what Andrew feels toward the death of his father. friends or family. Keith G. hopelessness and other symptoms of depression. “Guilt is an inescapable fact of human existence. Perhaps in most cases guilt comes before depression but at times depression will cause people to feel guilty (because they seem unable to “snap out” of the despair). the induviduals chooses to be the victim of his or her own self-punishment. In either case a vicious cycle is set in motion… Guilt feelings often contribute to suicidal tendencies as well.” writes Dr.and along with it comes self-condemnation. Too often suicide becomes the ultimate punishment. Guilt and depression so often occur together that it is difficult to determine which comes first.

Psychologist Jane marks his book Counseling Teenagers. It is also an inescapable fact of adolescence. It is resentment and hostility toward the authority figure against whom the wrong . disruptive fact that plays a significant part in many of our psychological. It is shame. Christian psychiatrist Quentin Hyder described the complex emotion of guilt in this way: “it s partly the unpleasant knowledge that something wrong has been done. “Children… tend to believe that they are responsible for the events around them.” That tendency sometimes continues into adolescence. emotional and physical disorders. they may even feel guilt over his condition.sense of culpability the reasonable guilt that results from wrong acts they do commit. If a friend gets hurt in their presence. and the result is a potent spiritual and emotional mixture.often unreasonable. regret or remorse. If they pass a homeless man on the street. Olson describes guilt as: … a very painful. It is partly fear of punishment. they’re apt to fell some degree of guilt about it. Add to this acute.

has been done. particularly those christians who are more legalistic in their theology and practice. but also from oneself. It leads to alienation. is partly depression and partly anxiety. And Bruce Narramore states : It is amazing how consistently the church has taught that guilt feelings experienced by God’s children come from God. Guilt therefore. This leads to loneliness and isolation. It is a feeling of low self-worth or inferiority. A brief look at these distinctions will help . because of the discrepancy between what one really is and what one would like to be. I believe the reason the church has equated guilt feelings with the voice of God is due to its failure to distinguish between three different types of guilt and God’s method of dealing with Christians and non-Christians. not only from others. Olson goes on to point out that Christians often have greater difficulty coping with guilt than non-Christians do.

…But this doesn’t mean that we feel guilty. psychological guilt is the type of guilt that afflicts many teens . It is a condition or state of being in which we are less perfect than God intends us to be. civil or legal guilt. The first. refers to the violation of divine law. Obviously. It is a condition or state rather than a feeling or emotion. Theological guilt.clarify the problem. We can be guilty of breaking the speed limit. signifies the violation of human law. But theological guilt is not a feeling or emotion. The bible indicates that each of us is theologically guilty. we have all “sinned and fall short of the glory of God”(Romans 3:23). emotional experience that we commonly call guilt. In contrast to the legal and emotional types of guilt. but it is not necessarily accompanied by the emotional aspect of guilt. even though we may not feel guilty. painful. on the other hand. psychological guilt is an emotinal feeling. In a biblical sense. we are all in continual state of theological guilt. Psychological guilt is the punitive. for example.

Gary Collins points out that this subjective guilt may be strong or weak. appropriate or inappropriate. It may be befecial. PHYSICAL EFFECTS . Among the effects are physical and emotional effects. Psychological guilt. and depressive tendencies in adulthood. sometimes to an intense degree. while it may accompany legal or theological guilt. Dr. shortened attention span and/or daydreaming. inhibitory influences which make life miserable. But guilt feelings can also be destructive. withdrawal.” THE EFFECTS OF DEPRESSION The effects of depression can read like a catalog of physical and psychological afflictions. is highly subjective. prompting us “to change our behavior or seek forgiveness from God and others. suicidal behavior.and preteens. masked reactions.

The quality of his sleep is affected …. he may sleep too much. These biochemical changes have various physical results : The body movements of the depressed individual usually decrease. There is often a loss of sexual interest. The depressed individual may suffer from tension headaches or complain of tightness in his head. He may have gastrointestinal disturbances. he may have a stooped posture and seem to be in stupor.Minirt and Meier catalog some of the physical ramifications of depression : Clinical depression includes the physical symptoms …. but more frequently from constipation. A rapid geartbeat and heart palpatations are . He may suffer from a dry mouth. Thus. or it may be irregular. He either eats too much or too little (usually too little). Initially. He may suffer from diarrhea. Along with slow body movements. he may have either significant weight loss or weight gain. the menstrual cycle may stop entirely for months. In women. He may have a slow matabolic rate. rather than sleeping too litle. His appetite is also often affected.

And individual suffering from depression has a sad facial expression. These physiological changes scare most individuals into hypochondriasis (an overconcern with physical illnesses). . they may evidence some emotional effects of depression. EMOTIONAL EFFECTS While teens may not exhibit the classic signs of adult depression. He either cries often [“ the weeps”] or feels like it. such as those described by Minirt and Meier : One major symptom of depression is a sad affect (or moodiness).fairly common. as mentioned above. He looks depressed.

The corners of his mouth droop. discouraged.His eyes are cast down and sad. . He looks tired. As the depression progresses. DAYDREAMING Campbell suggests: In mild teenage depression. … [The teen’s] mind drifts from what he wants to focus on and he becomes increasingly distractable. His forehead is wrinkled. This shortening of attention span usually becomes obvious when the teens attempt to do his homework. he gradually loses interest in his personal appearance. the first symptom generally seen is shortened of attention span. He finds it harder and harder to keep his mind on it. He finds himself daydreaming more and more. and dejected. His features are strained.

drinking. Of course. this leads to frustration. MASKED REACTIONS Researchers Marion Ehrenberg.” Collins lists the following “masked reactions. the less he accomplishes. as the teenager then bleames himself for being “stupid” or “dumb”.” or “depressive equivalents. and Ramon Koopman point out that adolescents do not typically express their depression directly but rather through the use of “masks.” • • Aggressive actions and angry temper outburst Impulsive behavior. violence. . You may escape from painful reality or frustration by creating a make-believe situation fantasy that is morepleasurable than the real situation.And it seems that the harder he tries. including gambling. David Cox.

and poor grades. but may disengage himself from them with such hostility. school phobias. the teenager becomes very lonely. belligerence. As a result.destructiveness or impulsive sex • • • Accident proness Compulsive work Sexual problems Other masked reactions might include deliquency. And to make matters worse. he doesn’t simply avoid his pers. and unpleasantness that he alienates them. And since he has so . WITHDRAWAL Campbell writes: In this miserable state the teenager may withdraw from peers.

who adds that withdrawal can take several forms: • Leaving the room. • • Hiding the problem by drinking or taking drugs.thoroughly antagonized his good friends. and • Denying. • • Avoiding the problem by plunging into work or other activities. he finds himself associating with rather unwholesome peers who may use drug and/or are frequently in trouble. by thinking about othe things. or by escaping into a world of television or novels. taking a vacation. that depression even exists.behavior which also could be used to “get back” a the person who makes you depressed. “Perhaps this is the easiest butleast effecive way to deal with depression. consciously or unconsciously. or otherwise removing oneself physically from the situation that arouses depression.” writes Collins. SUICIDAL BEHAVIOR Many studies have linked adolescent depression to suicidal behavior (including .

nearly half of them members of Lori’s family. 1984. Lori dropped out of church not long afterward. Pfeffer.Carlson and Cantwell. While some people carefully plan their self-destructive act. drink excesive. suicide attempts are unconscious cry for help. 1979. 1982. or find other ways to flirt with death. The ceremony was attended by about sixty people. and the story is this : Fourteen-year-old Lori had been baptized just months before at Blue Spring Community Church.Zuckeman. a one-room country church a few miles away from her home. For others. Simons and Murphy. often in a sincere attempt to kill themselves and escape life. The pastor and his . Plutchik. I had read an article in a Christian magazine . an opportunity for revenge. and Mizruchi. others drive recklessly. or a manipulative gesture designed to influence some person who close emotionally…. however. 1985). Crumley. Collins write : Not all depressed people attempt suicide but many do.

The train engineer. . I’m sorry. knelt between the rails. emptied her school locker.wife visited her several times. but no one suspected the real reason for her absence. Lori was pregnant. and folded her hands over her little round belly as Amtrak 168 barelled down upon her. I’ve got too many problems. The entire church was concerned for her. I am taking the easy way out. but they failed to persuade Lori to return to the small church. a man who had a fourteen-year-old daughter of his own. Mom. She walked to the railroad tracks near her house.” Lori left that day before her mother arrived home from work. Lori tidied her room. About a month before she expected to deliver. but I wasn’t OK. and wrote a note to her mother: “You kept asking me if I was OK and I kept telling you I was.

the thought of suicide is ongoing and if help is not forthcoming he may become convinced it’s the only way out. “A clinically depressed youth may become suicidal. and the expert agree. .” She’d be sorry if I was dead. She cites her own experience: I remember writing my own diary when I was a teenager and angry at my mother.” writes author Marion Duckworth. Seventy percent of patients who commit suicide have depression and would have consulted or attempted to consult a physician or counselor within 6 weeks of their attempt.later said that when he saw Lori. it was too late to stop the train.” But for a seriously depressed youth. One out of seven teenager with recurrent depression commits suicide. He watched her cross herself before she died.

Youth specialist and lecturer Jerry Johnston writes. 4 percent [had] attempted it. the total comes to a staggering sixty-five hundred lives lost … Reliable sources now say that over a thousand teenagers try unseccefully to kill themselves every day! Almost one teen per minute tries to commit suicide. David Elkind reports : A recent survey of 1.986 teens in Who’s Who Among American High School Students found that 30 percent of these young people had considered suicide. eighteen teenagers per day kill themselves in the United States.Suicide is the second leading cause of death among teenagers. Dr. What a nightmare it is to realize over a hundred of teenagers per week kill themselves in the world. and 60 percent said they knew a peer who . According to the National Institute of Mental Health. Every eight minutes another teenager takes the suicidal plunge. In a year’s time.

had attempted suicide or had killed himself.

The statistics do not tell nearly the whole story, however. Many suicides are not even counted in the above statistics due to several factors. Dr. Keith Olson points out: There are more successful suicides each year that are counted as other forms of death because of lack of knowledge of the victim’s intent or motivation. A significant percentage of one-car accidents are actual suicide…. Some people who are medically ill die only because they stop taking their medication. And others “flirt with death” by their invlvement in high-risk occupations and sports (e.g., sky diving …) and life-endangering habits (e.g., smoking, heavy drinking and drug abuse). And finally, Marvin E. Wolfgang has studied a form of suicide that is maily peculiar to adolescents and young adults. “Victim precipitatal homicide” occurs wen one person provokes or set up another person to kill him or her.

More importantly, perhaps, statistics alone do not convey tha tragedy of teen suicide, nor its epidemic proportions. The human tragedy of promising lives lost in a moment, of parents, siblings, and friends enduring unspeakable grief and sorrow, of families and communities torn apart, cannot be measured. David Elkind points out that it is often difficult to identify teens who are contemplating suicide partly because “teenagers in particular are often reluctant to reveal the problems they are experiencing or their inner thoughts. Unfortunately many teens also conceal their inner pains and fears so that their parents and closest friends have no idea that they are suffering and considering suicide.

“Nonetheless,” Elkind says, “while many young people often give no implications of an impending suicide attempt, others do.” Some of the signs that may alert a parent, teacher, youth leader, pastor or friend to a possible suicide

attempt include: • • • • • • • • • • • • Previous suicide attempt Threats of suicide Talking about death Preparation for death (cleaning out locker, giving away possessions, etc.) Depression Sudden change in behavior (acting out, violent behavior, etc.) Moodiness Withdrawal Somatic complaints (sleeplessness, sleeping all the time) Fatigue Increase risk-taking Drafting suicide note While it is not always possible to recognize the signs of suicidal tendencies

in a journal.or to prevent a teen from complaining or committing suicide. It is important to realize that these negative views are part of depression and typically do not accurately reflect the actual situation. In the meantime. Such negative thought and feelings make some people feel like giving up. worthless. . a familiarity with the causes and precipitating factors of adolescent suicide can make a crucial difference. or using art to help release some negative feelings. either to friends. helpless and hopeless. • • • • Eat healthy foods. Express your feelings. THE RESPONSE TO THE PROBLEM OF DEPRESSION Depressive disorders make those afflicted feel exhausted. the following are helpful tips for coping depression. Many may find that folate food supplements help improve their mood. It should remembered that negative thinking fades as treatment begins to take effect. Make time to get enough rest to phsically promote improvement in your mood.

• Do not expect to ‘snap out’ of your depression.• • Do not set difficult goals for yourself or take oa a great deal of responsibility. such as changing jobs or getting married or divorced without consulting others who knows well. • Do not expect too much from yourself too soon as this will only increase feeling failure. You might try exercising mildly. Break large tasks into small ones. seet some priorities. These people often can have a more objective view of your situation. or partcipating in religious or social activities. • Do not make major life decisions. Participate in activities that may make you feel better. • Don’t rush to overdo it. it is advisable to postpone important decisions until your depression has lifted. People rarely do. In any case. • • • Try to be with other people. Help yourself . which is usually better than being alone. Feeling better takes time. and do what you can when you can. going to a movie or a ball game. Don’t get upset if your mood is not greatly improved right away.

do not keep excess medication of any kind. WHAT IN GENERAL SHOULD DEPRESSED teen DO in addition to treatment? It is first important to learn what the circumstances are that brought the condition and know what to expect particularly during the initial period of treatment. • Limit your access to things that could be used to hurt yourself or others (for example. Teens need to remember that they should not blame theirselves for their illness as they did not ask themselves ro suffer from it. do not accept your negative thinking. like calling friends. Remember. It is part of the depression and will disappear as your depression responds to treatment. or other weapons in the home). family. Teens should at best give themselves a . and do not blame yourself for not being up to par. • Plan how you would get help for yourself in an emergency. your physical or mental-health professional or a local emergency room if you were to develop thoughts of harming yourself or someone else. firearms.• • as much as you can.

They should take their medications as prescribed. Also. For the same reason. This may be difficult for unmotivated teens so that is when the madication can help. More drugs are metabolized in the liver and taking alcohol may likewise hinder or hasten the metabolism of these drugs. exercise helps the release of endhorphins which makes us feel a sense of well being. Having something to do takes your mind off the negative thoughts and channel your energies to more productive endeavors. illicit drugs and other sedative or stimulating agents are not to be taken. get plenty of rest. stay physically active. Alcohol causes similar changes in brain chemistry as occurs during depressive episode. A depressed teenager should not make any major life decisions . While it may initially help them fall asleep. it’s sedative effect wears off quickly causing early morning awakening. WHAT IN GENERAL SHOULD A DEPRESSED TEEN NOT DO? A depressed teenager should not drink alcohol. eat regularly. and keep socially involved. Many teenagers with major depression attempt to self medicate with alcohol to either help themselves sleep or to ‘calm their nerves’.reprieve from nrgative thinking for now.

HOW CAN SOMEONE HELP A PERSON WHO IS DEPRESSED? Family and friends can help! Since depression can make the affected person feel exhausted and helpless. On . The most important thing anyone can do for the depressed person is to help him or her get an appropriate diagnosis and treatment. people who have never had a depressive disorder may not fully understand it’s effects. unintentional. This help may involve encouraging the indivudual to stay with treatment until symptoms begin to go away (usually several weeks) or to seek different treatment if no improvement occurs. However. he or she will want probably need help from others. friends and loved ones may unknowingly say and do things that may be hurtful to the depressed person.likewise especially if depression is moderate severe. It may help to share the information in this article with those you most care about so they can better understand and help you. Although.

It may also mean monitoring whether the depressed person is taking medication for several months after symptoms have improved. Invite the depressed person for walks. religious or cultural activities. sports. The second most important way to help is to offer emotional support. Do not disparage feeling experessed. Always report a worsening depression to the teenager’physician or theraphist. and encouragement. affection. Engage the depressed person in conversation and listen carefully. Always report them to the depressed person’s theraphist. it may require making anappointment and accompanying the depressed person to the doctor. Do not accuse the depressed person of faking illness or of laziness. and to the movies and other activities. patience. but point out realities and offer hope. such as hobbies. This support involves understanding. The depressed person needs company and diversion. but too many demands can increase feelings of failure. Encourage participation in activities that once gave pleasure. However. Do not . outings. do not push the depressed person to undertake too much too soon. Do not ignore remarks about suicide. Be gently insistent of your invitation is refused.occasion.

The patient might not realize how much help he or she needs. WHERE CAN ONE SEEK HELP FOR DEPRESSION? A complete physical and psychological diagnostic evaluation by professionals will help the depressed person decide the type of treatment that might be best for him or her. such as pssychiatrists. psychologists. pastoral or mental-health counselors. social workers. Moreover. Health-maintenance organizations   . if the situation is urgent because a suicide seems possible. he or she will feel better. with time and help. In fact. Keep that in mind. taking the teen to the emergency room is appropriate course of action. However. with treatment most depressed peole do get better. Eventually. Listed below are the types and places that will make a referral or provide diagnistic and treatment services. keep reassuring the depressed person that.  Family doctors Mental-health specialists. he or she might feel undeserving of help because of the negativity and helplessness that is a part of depressive illness.expect him or her “ to snap out of it”.

often hospital-afflicted University or medical-school-afflicted programs State hospital outpatient clinics Family service/social agencies Private clinics and facilities Employee assistance programs Local medical and/or psychiatric societies         HOW CAN I HELP MYSELF NOT FEEL DEPRESSED? A testimony of a teenager who experienced depression : Some days I feel fine. or whaever. Community mental-health centers Hospital psychiatry departments and outpatient clinics Community support gropus. some days I feel like absolutely crap. but most days I can convince myself that even if . I don’t know if I’m imagining how I feel.

I’ve played sport my whole life. but nothing really deep.I’m imagining it. Things I do at the moment to help myself: • Plan for specific future goals. But I can’t/won’t/ don’t want to. but I really really don’t want to. and can’t really just head out for a jog at 3 a. It’s good. . or negative stuff that happens ( it took me about a month to let my close friends and family know that I’d broken up with my long-term boyfriend). Like a week’s holiday later this year. even stuff like the cute guy I hooked up with. put money away) • Exercise. I normally exercise three or four times a week. but I feel worst at night.m. and then it went to my parents and I spent a few months enduring sessions with an absolute idiot of psychologists. I just barely ever talk about how I’m feeling. And I know I could if I really wanted to. Probably not helping me now. that kind screwed up imagination itself probably means I should see someone. and work toward it (look up my destination. When I was 4th year. I told a techer I was very close to about being depressed. I have normal coversations about how crap last night’s tv was and so on.

how do I bring stuff like this with friends. When not try opening up to your friends little at a time? Start with smaller confessions/admissions and work up to bigger ones. instead of “I always feel ike . I’ve started noticing the awesome scenery around me. but on writing I think that I won’t until I really want to. I have no experience. but I can imagine it’s a lot easier to type about how you feel with a theraphist than to actually talk about it. spontaneous extra question. So. what can I do for myself to help me feel better? And. without being an attention seeking drama queen? If you don’t want to talk about how you feelto a theraphist. Like.• Being conscious of good things. Yoga might help and you can do it at night. It sounds like you are not in the habit of having confidants. like going to one of the prettiest campuses in the country. I try and list positive things I’ve got. but you are willing to confront thses feelings. maybe you can try online theraphy. I think theraphy’s not a bad choice. like travel opportunities and so on. if you can convice yourself to do it. My original question was how could I make myself see a therapist.

“I can’t believe I sleep all weekend/couldn’t sleep. “have any of you tried theraphy? I swear. I bet some of your friendshave had theraphy and that alone might make it more palatable.crap and think I need psychiatric help. I think all this crap at work/school is really starting to wear me down.” Alternatively. xx is driving me so crazy I’m starting to have dreams about it.” say. you could just flippantly ask. .” See how it flies.