11 of the Craziest Things in Dubai
Certain cities fascinate Hoffstrizz. Occasionally he will look up a city on the google maps, read the wikipedia, and meander himself a little virtual tour. Does anyone else do this? Hoffstrizz knows the central geography of Pyongyang way better than he ought to admit. Anyway, one of the cities which is a source of ceaseless fascination is the city of Dubai....
What is going on here?... Many of the city's more outlandish projects have been suspended over the last few years. Those islands they're obsessed with building may be sinking. And the real estate market might collapse and those developers might not be able to feed all their Bangladeshi slaves. But all of that simply makes Dubai that much more awesome. But boy were those projects insane. In fact, the shit these Dubai developers came up with makes Hitler's delusional architectural projects look small and unambitious...
The future hypothetical Dubai... The only city in the world which is attempting to build space tattoos. That's what those motherfuckers are, they are space tattoos...
.Anyway. Dubai now has the world's tallest skyline.. So we look at 11 crazy things in Dubai. it's still just about the most absurd place on the planet.
The Hydropolis. And of course. An underwater luxury hotel? Probably about the 57th most ridiculous of Dubai's cancelled projects. BurjKhalifa
1. despite the slow progress on Dubailand (and I'm particularly pissed off that Hydropolis isn't happening). and Hoffstrizz does enjoy ridiculous feats of architecture.
Of course. so much of it is empty. At 2. they finished it right as Dubai was forced to seek a bailout from Abu Dhabi.We'll start with the world's tallest building of course.
. no other building comes close. and it's so damn large you can't even get a sense of perspective about it.717 feet tall. but still they managed to finish it.
Burj Al Arab
and standing on its own private island. Check out that tennis court on top. How does that even work? Isn't it fucking windy up there? The smallest room in this place is 1.The Burj al-Arab.
. Or just go on your chauffered Rolls-Royce shopping experience. Guests can choose from a "pillow menu" with a range of 13 quilts and pillows to choose from.053 feet.820 square feet. is one gawdy motherfucking luxury hotel. at 1.
it performs a song. There are 6. And every 20 minutes between 6 and 10 p.m. and it shoots water 500 feet into the air. 25 projectors. is the world's largest fountain.600 colored lights.Located outside the world's tallest building. the Dubai Fountain.
about ten other theme parks.
. a Legoland.Even though Dubailand is doomed for failure. the world's largest mall. we have to talk about it. it's more like an amalgamation of adjacent building projects. and would include well literally everything. Leaning Tower of Pisa. The entire project was supposed to stretch 107 square miles.just look at this list.. that is the ultimate goal... etc.a Six Flags... TajMahal. but boy do they have some crazy models sitting around.. Dubai is not like a normal city. part of Dubai Sports City.. something called Dubai Lifestyle City. Yes. There's also Dubai Golf City. and only about 2% of the entire project is completed. Perhaps my favorite proposed project was the Falconcity of Wonders which was supposed to recreate life-size replicas of the Eiffel Tower. I doubt they're ever going to build any of these things. Hanging Gardens. And lest you forget. people are supposed to live in these amusment park cities. You see.. Dubai will literally just be a giant amusement park.
5. Rose Tower
6.Just the world's tallest hotel at 1. Palm Jumeirah
is crazy about building artificial islands. as mentioned. Remember this? (which doesn't even show everything) Well the only one they've actually finished is the Palm Jumeirah.Dubai. It turns out that building these things was a little trickier than first imagined. and "the Dubai Waterfront".
. which is the little guy in the far left of the picture. the World. the Universe. as well as a few other insane projects. There are three proposed palm islands.
and is the selfdeclared "Eighth Wonder of the World."
Oh. you fancy. Really you couldn't make this shit up. a monorail. Too bad the Palm Jumeirah is sinking.The palm includes innumerable luxury hotels. lots of fancy homes. the one project they actually managed to complete will probably end up collapsing. huh? And look at all these lovely.
. disturbingly over-priced homes. Yes.
Dubai is not really a city.7. Dubai Marina
. part of the "new Dubai". One of the coolest of these is Dubai Marina. a self-contained city set on a 3km canal. but an amalgamation of enclosed luxury/business compounds.
8.There are some crazy skyscrapers planned for Dubai Marina including the "Elite Residence" and "Ocean Heights" towers. both of which are under construction. Ski Dubai
or is it the stupidest? Perhaps both..an archipelago of man-made islands shaped to appear as a map of the world from space.9. of course. But then... we have "THE WORLD".. The World and the Universe
Let's return to those islands. and one of which looks unfavorable. one of which is stalled mid-way.
. Is this the most awesome architectural project in the history of mankind. There are three proposed palm islands. one of which has been completed.
. a project which would have taken 15-20 years to complete. Now. but by 2009 work on the islands had been suspended. but has been on hold anyway for the last two.They managed to sell off most of the islands in time for the financial crisis to hit and the Dubai bubble to deflate. And then we've got "The Universe". they're supposedly sinking. So in another twenty years it's going to turn out that Dubai literally took all of its oil profits and threw them into the ocean.
. Business Bay is a nearly 50.Basically a new financial capital for Dubai. And it will be filled with the most ridiculous skyscrapers known to man. designed to hold an eventual population of 300..000.
. the coolest of which will be the Burj al Alam.000 square foot development project.000.
080 feet. the Al Yaqoub. Dubai is currently on a mission to build the world's largest clocktower. Al Yaqoub Tower
Yes. which will stand 1. Why not?