A Professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. So the Professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The Professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "Yes." The students laughed. "Now", said the Professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - your family, your children, your health, your friends, your favourite passions - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff." "If you put the sand into the jar first", he continue d, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house, and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand." The Professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. When he had finished, there was a profound silence. Then one of the students raised her hand and with a puzzled expression, inquired what the beer represented. The Professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of beers." A little girl walks into the lounge one Sunday morning while her Dad is reading the paper."Where does poo come from?" she asks.

are you still there?" "Yes" comes back the answer." says the husband. "Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff.. "Where are you?" asks the husband The drunk replied. "Just some drunk asking for a push. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger. "Not a chance. about three months ago when we broke down." answers the girl. "Yes. Who was that?" asked his wife. you have a short memory.. "it is 3 o'clock in the morning!" He slams the door and returns to bed. and stares at him in stunned silence for a few seconds and then asks in a little voice: . standing in the pouring rain. at 3 o'clock in the morning by loud pounding on the door. Pulled a mussel. and goes out into the pouring rain."he answers. is asking for a push. gets dressed. "Can't you remember.. it is 3 o'clock in the morning and it is pouring out there!" "Well.Her father feeling a little perturbed that his 5 year old daughter is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says: "Well you know we just ate breakfast?" "Yes. "and Tigger?" I went to a seafood Disco over the weekend." The little girl looks shocked. and that is poo. and you should be ashamed o f yourself!" The man does as he is told. "Hello. calls out the husband. and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him. "Did you help him?" she asks. "Over here on the swing!" . "Do you still need a push?". and then whatever is left over comes out of our bums when we go to the toil et. please!" comes the reply from the dark. A man and his wife are awakened. He calls out into the dark.. Q: How do you turn a du ck into a soul singer A: Put it in a microwave until its bill withers. "No I did not." says his wife.

"Darling. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man.The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office. I don't know what kind of a mamby -pamby place you worked at before. they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.. and then there are educators. Robertson. I refer to my employees by their last name only Smith. He took out a long-handled squeegee. Baker .that's all. what is your last name?" The new guy sighed and said. she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required. there have been no lip prints on the mirror. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. That was fine. and cleaned the mirror with it." the new guy replied. Since then. To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors. "What is your name?" was the first thing the manager asked the new guy.." According to a news report. Now that we got that straight.. John. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority.. The manager scowled." "Okay. "Look. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the maintenance man who had to clean the mirrors every night. A number of 12 -year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. Jones. . the next thing I want to tell you is. but after they put on their lipstick. but I don't call anyone by their first name. I am to be referred to only as Mr.. "John. My name is John Darling. MORAL: There are teachers. Every night the maintenance man would remove them and the next day the girls would put them back. dipped it in the toilet. a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem.

" Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult. whispering." whispered the small voice. " No . " Hello ? " "Is your daddy home?" he asked. Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone. "May I talk with him?" The child whispered. he's busy". Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers. "Yes . the boss asked. "Is anybody else there?" "Yes. the child answered "The search team just landed in a helicopter . "What is going on there?" demanded the boss. the boss asked. "Is your Mommy there?" " Yes . whispered the child." came the whispered answer. "a policeman ". Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home. Again. he dialled the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper. now truly apprehensive. the boss asked. " No . "May I speak with the policeman?" "No. "Busy doing what?" "Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman. the boss asked." Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message." ." "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered.A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day." whispered the child. "What is that noise?" "A helicopter" answered the whispering voice.

. concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked...... . let me shleep for half an hour. Sean says.. After the show. Still whispering. we can have the besht shex yet... Cilla says... Cilla Black. that was wonderful.. who was also a guest. So they went back to her place and got comfortable After a couple of drinks they went off to bed and had an hour of mad passionate sex together.... 'Sean........" Sean Connery was interviewed by Michael Parkinson.... 'If you think that was good. but says 'Okay'.... He sleeps for half an hour.. Lets go back to my ouse. I'd luv to 'ave sex with yer. looked intrigued....' 'I know Sean. ...... and we can have better shex. But if you let me shleep for an hou r.........Alarmed.. ... Cilla complies with the routine.. " ME .... Afterwards.. No problem hun'............ Then Sean says. ...... if I'm not bein too forward.... he could still have sex 3 times a night... But while I'm shleeping. 'Cilla.... the young voice replied with a muffled giggle... awakens. "What are they searching for?" .. and they have even better sex than before. You'll have to. Yer want me to 'old onto yer bat 'n balls again. we could 'ave a lorra fun....... hold my balls in your left hand and ma willie in your right hand'...... Cilla looks a bit perplexed.. and bragged that despite being 72 years of age..

. 'No. Receptionist: Oh I'm sorry Mr Smith. can I see her eerth?" the dwarf says. Can I see her wun awound?" Man goes to the doctor's for his wife's test results. dis 'oldin yer balls in one hand and yer willie in de other .can I see her twot?" With this the owner picks the dwarf up by the scruff of his neck and shoveshis head deep inside the horse's private parts. "Nithe eerth. he says to the owner of the farm. says the dwarf.' He says. One set shows Alzheimer's Disease. tell me." says the dwarf.. He holds him there for a couple of seconds before pulling him out and putting him down. "What sort of horse?" said the owner. "Now..does it really stimulate yer that much?' Sean replies. The owner is getting fed up but again picks up the dwarf to show him the horse¶s ears. So the owner shows him a mare. they have a drink. "Can I thee her eyeth?" So the owner picks up the dwarf to show him the horse¶s eyes. I'm afraid it's bad news or terrible news. Mr Smith: I'm here for Mrs Smith's test results. We have 2 sets of test results for a Mrs Smith and we don't know which is yours... "Nithe eyeth. but the last time I shlept with a scouser. Sean lights a cigarette and Cilla asks 'Sean.". "Nithe horth. "Can I thee her teeth?" Again the owner picks up th e dwarf to show him the horse¶s teeth. the other shows AIDS. Mr Smith: That's awful! What should I do? . "Nithe teeth. there's been a problem. The dwarf shakes his head and says: "Perhaps I should weefwaz e that.The results this time are absolutely mind blowing.. not at all Cilla. "I'd like to buy a horth". "A female horth" the dwarf replies. the cow stole ma wallet !' # 12-01-2007 11:40am A dwarf with a lisp goes into a stud farm.. Once it's all over.

Then. so Stacy can get better. In the meantime. your son. so you can get to know your many grandchildren. tattoos. Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods. Love. and trading it with the other people in the commune. John. She sure deserves it!! Don't worry Dad.S. really hurt anyone. She's preg nant. If she finds her way home. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't. and she is so nice. none of the above is true. and because she is so much older than I am. P. Dad. we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS.Receptionist: The doctor suggests you drop her off in the middle Of town. with trembling hands. But it's not only the passion." With the worst premonition. but I knew you would not approve of her. . don't shag her. and I know how to take care of myself. A father passing by his son's bedroom. Dad. I'm 15. We share a dream of having many more children. "Dear. I had to elope with my new girlfriend. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the school report that's on my desk. her tight Motorcycle clothes. and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. "Dad. We'll be growing it for ourselves. I've been finding real passion with Stacy. It was addressed. because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mum and you. I'm sure we'll be back to visit. Dad. and everything was picked up. propped up prominently on the pillow. for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. I'm over at Tommy's house. he saw an envelope. he opened the envelope and read the letter. because of all her piercings. Someday. was astonished to see the bed was nicely made.

" "Oh why. he wakes and looks out at the sheep. >> > > The Man hangs up and gives it some thought. >> > > The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and > > instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. brings them back and goes > > to bed. >> . >> > > The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means > > but.000 but you're going to have to go to Oxford. >> > > The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. has sex with them all. lie them down and wash their nether regions. he notices that none of the sheep are > > getting pregnant.that's the end of the queue. OK the job entails you getting patients ready for the gynaecologist. >> > > Next morning. Inter ested he goes to learn more.I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home. A bloke goes into the Job Centre in Chelsea and sees a card advertising for a Gynaecologist's Assistant. Then apply shaving foam and shave off all their pubic hair then rub in soothing oils so they're ready for the gynaecologist's examination. The Job Centre oppo sorts through his files & replies ." A Man buys several sheep. is that where the job's at?" "No . he loads the sheep into his lorry. There's an annual salary of £45. drives them out > > into the woods. not wanting to display his ignorance. hoping to breed them for wool. >> > > He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination > > means he has to impregnate the sheep. >> > > So. You have to help them out of their underwear. only asks the vet > > how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. and calls a vet for help."Oh yes here it is. >> > > After several weeks. "Can you give me some more details about this?" he asks the guy behind the desk.

he deduces that the first try didn't take. One more try.' On hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away." Horrified. Let's drink to our love!' 'Well. he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. 'No. upon returning home. and loads them in the lorry again." she says. bangs each sheep twice for good measure. too! It must be another sign. and proceeds to load them up and drive them out to the woods. She offers him the bottle.though their cars are written off. this bottle of wine survived intact. Next morning. the man stammers back. falls listlessly into bed. I agree with you completely!' The woman goes on. When she asked how her grandfather had died. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "they're all in the lorry and one of them is beeping the horn. so he downs half of it and hands it back. the man sees the woman is blonde and strikingly beautiful. . Then the woman turns to the man and gushes breathily:'That's incredible both our cars are demolished but we're fine. As they crawl out of the wreckage.' says the man." A woman and a man driver are involved in a horrific collision. her grandmother replied. It must be a sign from God that we are meant to be together!' Sensing a promise. brings them back and goes to bed.' says the woman.'And look. Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.'I think I'll just wait for the police. Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year old grandmother and comfort her. He spends all day shagging the sheep and. going with the moment. 'Your turn. though my car was destroyed. but amazingly both escape completely unhurt . He drives them out to the woods. thanks. he wakes to find the sheep still just standing around. "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning. The next morning. he tells himself. OK!' says the man.'Oh yes. "No.> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Seeing that they are all still standing around.

.. "And if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along. It was just the right rhythm. "Yeah. realizing our advanced age. 'You're the father of one of my children' she said. everything inside them is in alphabetical order.. from Birmingham. everything inside is numbered" The second. simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong. my dear. " replied granny." The fourth surgeon. but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is colour coded. says. . we figured out the best time to do it was when the ch urch bells would start to ring.. because when you open them up. "Many years ago. I like Construction workers."Oh no. Nothing too strenuous. from Belfast.. "No. chimes in: "You know. from Edinburgh says. wiped away a tear and then continued." But the fifth surgeon. 'I'm awfully sorry . those guys always understand when you have a few parts leftover. The first surgeon. from Manchester.. "I like to see accountants on my operating table. 'I remember you now' the man replied. he'd still be alive today!" A woman collared a man in a Tyneside street . Nice and slow and even. responds. Politicians are the easiest to op erate on." She paused. It was that drunken Stag Weekend about six years ago in New castle . shut them all up when he observed: "You're all wrong. I made mad passionate love to you in that hotel bedroom while one of the lads was hitting me on the bottom with a frozen kipper !!' 'You misunderstand me' she said 'I'm your son's English teacher !!' Conversation: Surgical arguments Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on." The third surgeon. from London. I really think librarians are the best.

A Chemical Analysis Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Atomic Weight: Accepted as 59. Chemical Properties : 1) Has great affinity for Gold. 3) Melts if given special treatment. no brains and no spine. Whose funeral is it?" "Well. ranging from virgin metal to common ore. "Well. 7) Undergoes unpredicatable spontaneous dehydrolysis (weeps)." He inquired further. 3) May explode spontaneously if left alone. "My mother-in-law. 4) Bitter if used incorrectly. 6) Yields to pressure applied to correct points. "My dog attacked and killed her. and the head and the arse are interchangeable. with slightly lower concentrations in Suburban and Rural areas. Platinum and many of the Precious Stones." "What happened to her?" The man replied. . no balls." A poignant and thoughtf ul moment of silence passed between the two men. but known to vary 50-88. but I've never seen a funeral procession like this." Woman . Physical Properties: 1) Surface usually covered with painted film. Silver. no heart. who is in the second hearse?" The man answered. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a very mean looking dog on a leash. "I am so sorry for your loss." A bloke was leaving the paper shop one morning when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said.There's no guts. 2) Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances. The man couldn't stand his curiosity. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Can cause headaches. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her as well. Handle with care! 5) Found in various states. Discoverer: Adam Occurance: Copious quantities in all Urban areas. "Can I borrow the dog?" "Get in line. freezes without reason. that first hearse is for my wife. Behind that were 200 men walking single file. and I know now is a bad time to disturb you. 2) Boils at nothing.

Caution : 1) Highly dangerous except in experienced hands. You must abstain from sex for one whole . "So THAT'S why me knickers ave got C&A on them. 6) Neutral to common sense. blimey!" exclaims the Essex girl. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle. "According to the picture on the box. Use extreme care when handling.4) Insoluble in liquids. 7) Most powerful money reducing agent known to Man. The pastor told them. "We have special requirements for new parishioners. but why doz one of your wellies ave an L on it. 2) Illegal to possess more than one." # 02-23-2008 07:30am A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. the Irish guy smiles. The one with the R is for me roight foot and the one with the L is for me left foot. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. it's a tiger. oim a little bit tick. put all these Frosties back in the box !!!. An Essex girl calls her boyfriend and says. 2) Can greatly improve relaxation levels. you see. puts down his pint of Guinness and replies." Her boyfriend asks. especially in sports cars. "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?" The girl says. 3) Can warm and comfort under some circumstances. An Essex girl and An Irish guy are in a bar when the Essex girl notices something strange about the wellies that the Irish guy's wearing. and the uva one's got an R on it?" So. 5) Repels cheap material." Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. and I can't figure out how to get it started. "Well. She says to him "Scuse me mate. then looks at the box. 2) Turns green when placed beside a better / younger specimen. He studies the pieces for a moment. Tests: 1) Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state. but there is increased activity when saturated in alcohol to a certain point.." "Cor. Uses: 1) Highly ornamental. I ain't bein fannny or naffink. "Please come over here and help me. then turns to her and says««.

but you will have to take their place. One of them is washing her "private area" and notices that there is a response on the monitor when she touches her. Is there a problem?" the pastor inquired. maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma. "We are terribly ashamed to admit that we did not manage to abstain from sex for the required month . my wife reached for a can of paint and dropped it. They go to her husband and explain what happened.." A bloke keeps ringing me up and singing Prince Charming and Stand and Deliver down the phone. but you definitely have to stay here. "Hmm.. Besides it's worth a try. I'll let one of them go. I have three people who weren't quite as bad as you. no pulse." admitted the man. When the Pastor ushers them into his office. Tell you what I'm going to do. "I think she choked. "We're not welcome at Ho mebase either. shamefacedly.. The hubby finally agrees and goes into his wife's room.. The husband is standing there.. One afternoon. the first week was difficult. pulling up his pants and says. "You understand this means you will not be welcome in our church. "We know" said the young man. I'll even let you decide who leaves. "Crazy as this sounds. Nurses are in her room giving her a sponge bath. telling him. but they assure him that they'll close the curtains for privacy.. We tried cold showers.month. "Well." A woman is in a coma. prayer." The husband is sceptical. we managed to abstain through sheer will power." The couple agreed and after two-and-a-half weeks returned to the Church. no heart rate." ... hanging his head. I don't know what to do here" says Satan . The second week was terrible. I was overcome with lust and had my way with her right then and there. I keep telling him to F**k off but he's adamant George Bush has a heart attack and dies. " the young man replied sadly. "You're on my list but I have no room for you. However. we managed to abstain. The pastor asked him what happened. the wife is crying and the husband obviously very depressed "You are back so soon. When she bent over to pick it up. the third week was unbearable. After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat-lines. He goes straight to hell where Satan is waiting for him. The nurses run into the room.. anything to keep our minds off carnal thoughts.. However. but with the use of prayer." stated the pastor. but your choice will be FINAL.. reading from the Bible.

Preparing to write a cheque so she goes into her purse to get her pen and pulls out a rectal thermometer and tries to write with it. so he agreed. lying naked on the floor with his arms staked over his head. When you approach the egg case. and his legs staked in a spread eagle pose. "YEAH. "No!" said George. She looks at the flabbergasted teller and without missing a beat she says "well thats great. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky. . you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you approach the milk cases. you're free to go!" A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after a 20 hour shift. you hear hens cluck and cackle. In it was Ted Kennedy. Satan opened the first room. Just before it goes on. She didnt quite understand fastest finger first. All he did was swing that hammer . "Okay. I'm not a good swimmer and don't think I could do that all day long." Satan opened a third room and in it was Bill Clinton." Then Satan led George to the next room." Satan then smiled and said. George Bush looked at this in disbelief and finally said. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. "I've a problem with my shoulder and would be in constant pain. I can handle this. and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. doing what she does best. thats really great" "some arseholes got my pen" An Irish woman has just been chucked off Who wants to be a millionaire for masturbating. Such was his fate in hell.George thought that sounded pretty good. you hear cows mooing and experience the scent of fresh hay. Monica. time after time after time. "No!" George said. and a large pool of water. gasping for air. In it was Tony Blair with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. A new supermarket opened near my house. He kept resurfacing over and over. "I don't think so. and more rocks appeared.

'This time it's mayonnaise . Wayne. not to be outdone. and have them both looking for work in two weeks. The Israeli doctor said..' says the Essex girl 'its great because if they are out playing in the street I just have to shout WAAYNE.' 'Doesn't that get confusing?' 'Naah. She places a garment on the counter. we can take a lung out of one person. Wayne.' says the Essex girl. cupping his ear. put him in Downing Street and have half the country looking for work within twenty -four hours" An Essex girl goes to the council to register for child benefit. put it in another. 'Medicine in my country is so advanced. Wayne. Wayne. 'That's nothing! In Germany. 'How many children?' asks the council worker.' An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners.The veggie department features the smell of fresh buttered corn. Wayne. we can take half a heart from one person. The way it's going this may be true ! During a break in a medical conference 4 participants wanted to boast of their countries' medical prowess.j '10?' says the council worker. 'I just use their surnames. 'What are their names?' 'Wayne. 'That's easy. '10' replies the Essex girl. put it in another. YER DINNER'S READY. and have him looking for work in four weeks. we can take a kidney out of one person. We can take An arsehole out of Scotland. 'In my country medicine is so advanced. I don't buy toilet paper there any more.' 'What if you want to speak to one individually?' says the perturbed council worker. Come again?' says the clerk.' The German doctor retorted.' The Russian doctor trumped them bo th. 'I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress.. Wayne and Wayne.. said "Hah!. Wayne.... No' she replies. put it in another.' she says.' The English doctor. and have him looking for work in six weeks. Wayne. or WAAYNE GO TO BED NOW and they all do it.

'Polish Remover'.Essex Girl enters a sex shop & asks for a vibrator.. the . The man says 'Choose from our range on the wall. Do either of you have a real grudge? No. Why do you want this divorce? She going to kill me.' She says 'I'll take the red one.' The man replies 'That's a fire extinguisher. A Polish man moved to the United States and married an American girl. an acre and half and nice little home. Have you any grounds? Yes. Is your wife a nagger? No. The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroo m making love to a very attractive young woman.. what are your relations like? All my relations still in Poland. I can read. I mean. Although his English was far fr om perfect. I am always up before her. Does your wife beat you up? No. they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. 'How dare you do this to me -. she is white. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom.' Apologies in advance. The lawyer said getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked him the following questions. What makes you think so? She going to poison me. we have carport and not need one. Is there any infidelity in your marriage? We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player. Needless to say the wife was somewhat upset. I mean what is the foundation of this case? It made of concrete. and it say: .a faithful wife. I don't think you understand.

' Please . aware of her beauty. and I also donated those boots you boug ht at the expensive boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same. ' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!' And the husband began -. go ahead. relaxed. in my compassion I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present.Between 35 and 44. a woman is like France : deliciously mature. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So. The poor thing devoured them in moments.' The husband took a quick breath and continued. not well dressed and very dirty. Then.' she sobbed. the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. a woman is like Africa : wild. do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?' FEMALE GEOGRAPHY . naturally beautiful and full of mysterious. I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. a woman is like India : sensual.Between 26 and 34. especially for those with stacks of money. but don't use because you say they are too tight. in full bloom. I noticed that she was very thin. . 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said.' Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower.Between 45 and 54. so at least I can tell you what happened. as she needed clothes. a woman is like America : well-developed and open for trade. I want a divorce straight away !' And the husband replied 'Hang on just a minute love. .'Well. fertile deltas. . . She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.' 'Fine.Between 18 and 25.. I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years. still a pleasant destination to visit.mother of your children ! I'm leaving you. which you don't use because I don't have good taste. and while she was showering I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just to annoy her.

. .Between 66 and 70.. with undefined frontier.. .Between 61 and 65. but without a future. a man is like Zimbabwe: ruled by a dick. a woman is like Afghanistan or the north pole: many know its whereabouts.After 70. a woman is like Yugoslavia : a lost war.. MALE GEOGRAPHY . great conquests. haunted by the mistakes of the past. The cold climate puts off any potential visitors. a woman is like Russia : vast. a woman is like Mongolia : a glorious past. .Between 15 and 90. but no-one dares to venture there. Major reconstruction work is mostly the only answer..Between 55 and 60..

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