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o--- ms Miserable _ Gargonle volume sixty-seven, issue 5 november 23, 2021 Masthead. Editor's Address managing editor-in-chief Hi, ‘nia kell Between daylight savings the beginning of Finals, and the ‘content editor-in-chief general encroaching of winter, seasons are affecting ov Teas huntsman merkur Sisoders. This issue is brovght to yu bythe ight ofa SAD lamp. The Garg is bere for you to vent about the treasurer incasessblity of Accessibility Services, how Health and sam swarup ‘Wellness has not kept yo healthy or wel, and curated playlists for erying before therapy. We hope at the leat you production manager find some slidarity within these pages, ifnat a good hearty ‘maya fischmann laugh cony editor May the coming weoks be easy svt bilingsey wwe love you polities Liveas Huntsman Merkur & Annika Keller livia chtg&enamah jg Boitors-in-Chiet 2021/2029 Jest ienstock opinions ash man & cree sarkis carts & culture Tey stark & tamara milion avant-garg win persaud & maya felsehmann Teas huntsman mera & maya morgen staff alyssa yon tsabella persand ‘ple ches staff emeritus | aya morgan contributors ‘liscadete ceuioe sen About us ‘The Gargoyles University College's easiest student newspaper and publishes every two weaks Weare paper tha believes that sometimes you shouldbe angry and that sometimes you should ‘be ond and ifyou have not hala voice before you deserve a voice, We donot give print space to ‘bigot and we do not feign netraityon ses of social justice. At tis moment everything in or ‘office is basking inthe glow ofa SAD lamp. Production bi-weekly on discord Join our server for instant elu. " vatgargoyteca Before {ben wou ke ost that this atic has content viewers may ind disturbing ‘ortwigacrng. Pease proceed with eaution, Snubbed my experience with UofT, Accessibility Services AN eg into my online government-run therapy app to see the same banner mocking me from ay seen every week It cade “Menta Health Affects Us A Al tat is offered is CHT, ‘or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, which Thave been practising and utilizing since Twas 13 yeas lm now 2, and my progress hasbeen more Oorless non-existent. This may bean exaggeration, bat the story Tam about to reall, Fst year at University was supposed to bbeone ofthe mos enjyable. eye-opening ‘experiences of mye, bat instead started to feo myoe fall back into old habits, expecially after the days shortened and the temperatures deply, and tam preparing o graduate neartbroken tthe recklessness ofthe enuatey’s top Univers. Thavegvea up asking for beter conditions because i hurts too much to keep sending out peas that are nt even acknowledged, nevermind resolved, I hope the following generation of UotT students demand hat no longer cold, Gdspeed Sa Tnactuality, ur medical system islet deal with th he elling me to get can't fix me Ch ‘ello darlin, is me. Do yeu miss me? Do you “Faas {Think of meat a2 Have my cries for compassion hhoen ignored? [stand moura the ile 1 ould fave led ino for your ever present aip, Won't You et go? Jost this once? BE i ‘Youve taken my youth and nove youre hungry for more. Will ou feast yourself on my mdulthood to? Ate you nt fall? Mabe my lie ‘wasnt substantial enough and ite you hungry Butityou had eft me alone | could have created {substantial ie for mya You'd befall now i hot for your own greed. only you had waited a few yen. Tet me have my twenties. Come back ater when rm 40. Then yl really have something feast on. Whats meal Il make you! you'd jast Teave meand let me bl ie fr myselt then Youll have something to takeaway. You feed Yourself rom a barten bowl and wonder why You starve for more Go away! {ve housed and loved you for years now. Your turn is over. You gaveme hope and took aay soon than I coud even acknowledge. Don't ‘even get ne started onthe love you ticked me Into thinking Thad, What more oud you want? {hin sbel ef woman. Each time I think Ive faund a new version of myself you ip the mask of and reveal yoursell. Who am if mot you? Have lever been anything else? Are we one? Cam ever separate myself rom you? "'m being unfsrto you, Youve always there for tne, You bold me after cach love affair maims me iid brusee me, You tend tomy wounds. Masbe owe yom, Maybe [just don't know what ie ould bike without you. Youre my muse ‘ou'vebeen assigned my muse at bth and there's no escaping you Even i stop loving yo, stop feeding you, you demand not to be [Ignored Youve my mot persistent lover. The ‘nlyone thats ever fought for me. Hove you and Thate you You made mehardto love. And you mde hard for me ofl love Ist fairte blame you? leit your ful that cannot ve se Ue? What ar ws Are Why don't you ever leave me? Trade spots with my lovers. Let them tay for once. You know where the door is, go ont and explore. Leave {pen for someone else to come in and love me Please stop lacking them ot. My dear, we're ba for exch other. Hove you and Thateyou I miss you w {Bsteyou ms youwhen oe gone, nd Tn But for fac sale — G0 WAY! UC An email I sent to h***th a*d wr ok ok gs after they charged me for missing two doctor's appointments lightly edited since the original was written in the ~heat of the moment~ joshua bienstock ‘Toywhom it may concern, writing in response to two emalls received from your ofice requesting that I ‘make payments of 840 foreach ofthe crite med ith I workalmost every day, sometimes fany as 6am uni 3 oF 4pm and commute peatyan hour each way im order todo sot faneell my clases on Monday and thes trork every other day of he eck, dont Stat to weal day every dy but in order {Simake vet, mist ecenly moved out ‘ofmrhouse after a very physically and emotionally tumultuous time with my parents during the pandemic. As such, any Sppointment that Lake wih health ad trelines have to take pce during my ise work hour, Taking important ‘home cll uring de s5 minutes that get {ovsitdowa, eat and dink some water ater DDeigom my feet for boar rt am ieal Stuntion to Bogn with, but hetth and ‘allnes opening hours are not ‘eommodating fr stents these pes tt situations, so we have Io make d, 4 \ [Asyou know health and wellness doctors tiasing united nmbers hat we exnnot ‘albac, working a minimum wage job ‘there your pone isnot allowed tbe ot Irie sou're working aos thi expecially Frardto manage Bec missing the call by ‘ve minute wos force mevocllthe fegule esith and wellnes amber perk o the reception staf also doesnt ‘nlp that I normally cannot choose when thy ress occur and oten have fo beg my iperssors to let me offat the time of ny “ppoltments: As you alo kaos, health ait welines wt ies exceed 20 mines tone normal day, 20 minutes tha iterally {So not have to wait around Roping that ‘Someone wil pick up. This makes itso that ‘host ofthe time, thecal ie Tean phone ‘EwhileTam commiting back home, ball ft which akes place om the subway were {Ton ave servic, making it even more Aitelt to get a old of Your office, And 1 ‘rou ls a that jst te other day wen Tpotoff work earl for once, Irie to cll {reschedule my missed appointment and Wate 20 minutes to gett he front ofthe Fe ony tobe to that Thad toleavea esse. ‘have succesfll been speting to Dr. Khayatin ioe January and {elev she ‘Moelle to attest othe ft that Tam engaged patient tht would never ‘ials team appointment. Teame to Teatth and wellness not because wanted to, hur beatae hed nowbere ese 08 Tat Nemember, | was balag horable chest tina dc toanaety and had onl been sith therapist fora couple ‘onthe: had been dealing with the “motional efiestofansety and depresion for many year unt aly convinced {nyocifty seek out help. 18 November, the Deapl thet ered about me told me Peach out for farther suppor from = ‘medial profesional bat Iwas hesitant cause my family iste in mea far of rental heath relted supports, with oF ‘Mout medication, and T knew my family {estar would not be supportive as hes scivelyam-acie (hich the eon at tie hm ad part ofthe we Tree wnpsoerakwots wih ‘Wandin ofm hou). . s ; AQ, Asa sodent at UofT, Lam entitled to eoeive a good quality of erie rom your fies repardes of these ereumstances, but Tm highlighting them anyways to show you the abhorrent eel of incvensbiity {hat your office has and the reputations recehes te result You have not ony ben omplict bu have actly worked to dest Students away fom your office Tiss ‘langrous. We havea mental health sis ‘on oar eamapas and ovr Health and Wellase centre needs tbe front and contre addressing which means having sn tive open-door poe that ees the ‘Nigma sarounding seoking help. Noone wants to have tobe put on medication; in ac, many students who have sousht or have yet to seek help, dont snd won tT thie sen UofT ofiale comment that ‘ing health and welless move ‘ceenbleforstadent wl snp enable {sto dse your office to obtain des a8 quick xe raher than commit to therapy cotether node of eae, This ts sicnply untrug,stignatizing and agin, dangerous. Moreover, charging mised appoitnent fees abhorrent, ha stop. seven mone ‘Shoreat when coe kes no acount Gerstein dt ete {hot were caren ving a work tht iieig cra logy wre = irda ae strain to sty at mental soademieal snd isa To brnden etude workog emia wage job witha mised calf wen there Titel othingthey can do prevent ‘cha stk sere or rls to {toma hr cnn oor on Spelt neta and ps ig, 1 pray that this resonates wih you, the inlnkual reaponsbl for administrating the health and wellness conte 1 know that You want to elp. know that yoo probably {othe best you ean, And Tals know that ‘nacho he reality of he situation is Sevond your conta ven thatthe University wil nt commit the fonds fecessary to have Health and Wallness fetually met demand and enable itt» Inaintsin« higher nee of acess. But implore yo todo what you ean. Get i of your eanetlltion foes, Make itexser for Stet working with on tomanage theirappoitments online so that they don't ave to cll Were wt Ee slleges and faces tense hat Stuents re aware of your services ana hits to elp Thor's so mach mote you tan do, And as for myself ak that you waive the {es from mi missed sppoiaiments and remove the Bol placed on my acorn ecount. Lam fully aware that one Is Shpposed fo contact yor fie no more than weeks fllosinga missed §ppointment with grievances offer this to hreyet another example of health and wellness" inaccessibility especially to ‘udents working parttime who have ‘bligatons daring the work/school day that preveots them from jumping through the Hoops requzedof them to get in Contact wph our afce And a8 8u¢8, 1 oak filly soni vin 00 oul e ling me fyou west deny Toqust What Kind ofeerce do you want tober Areyona corporation attested ‘eunoaatngprotte and aking aJventage ttstents or re ou a serie comin tocar weliing? Right now. Ts not 0 Soret ieae upto yout chow Hook forward to your response We Are All So Tired: Slept on Campus tte cadete States of wellness ae constantly changing: Think this is fundamental truth Taso, think that we ll ty to bide our states of tunweliness feu each other ewen ie Know thet i's what brings o together. Sometimes when Tm walling dow camput Ica notice when semeape is feeling ave and 1 know hey ean Took at meandsee tas well campus 3a la fullatstrangers who are al fair with the signs ofeach others existences. Sometimes Ise someone walking down St CGoorge and Intice ther; notice the way their shoulders sag anderthe weight of their textbooks, notice the bags under Their eves, the wy they dru tele fingers on thelr Jeans when theyre restless My fore in of ayo ty iat ih ‘i Tlovestayig in ere Smet: Shon ged aud rekon my yes and imagine how many people are Shake right now on campus tering {ibvaics surrounding me: many of them [skep, drooling om tel books There ae So my people in these Dulldngs, and we reall thinking the same tings. This tity. This is abundance This email was sent on October 14% have Jettoreccivea reponse ad thew ists hold om any acom accom ut stil sing o doctor's appotntnents because 1 mented toge hprom ny ener Weall are you are strugating wath your mental health, whether tra recent development or aomthing you've been neglecting for along ie, ou owe to ourself et helps never tou aes You tenet baken 30 you fault hat you “rea feeling wall Vou are doing the best, Yate. Wellve ina soy andte sbsotly fucking shit. ‘The UC Gargoyle stands in solidarity with ‘pathy CNY SEE ‘yond night studying, think ay favorite {tine about university 30 far that you can [lanlesp nearly anjwere and no one will Betta second ought There's ete inderstanding we give cach othe that goes tinspoken; we areal so ire ‘Te fallen asleep in lot of plaes.on Campus, bere's condensed list. you're ending thie maybe youve sept there as ‘SEIT ak there's comethingbenutitel Tout two strangers being cosmically onnecte by a spot ey ve both ‘Shamelesslynapped in That thought Ieee feel well even in amy most nel Thea heres to hoping til help you to. places ve Step on Campus (aed maybe tou have too! Rete on aeeale af 10 in terms of comfort. St. Michael's College Student Common Centre ‘ona very comfortable grey couch by the PT Bl aslep tothe sound of some Freeh atudents paying pool surprising Sonar arbinace sound! (9/10) ly Gerstein unched over a wooden table at Morrison Pelion, wouldve been more comfortable Fithe chairs werent wooden. [55/10] ‘Sydney Smith Lecture Hall 2117 the top row of seats this lecture al straight from hell and the seats ae so slippery, but T got solid sap. [3/20] Trinity College Quad ‘Thebes leping experience I've had so far Twas outside, om te paverent and in the sun Very relaxing, [10/10], Kelley Café Fee ee oackes om the et sieof the Storm wovidve been more comfortable 1 are piow bat dnt fut Kelley for ths Tojo} students and workers in the fight agsnst ‘aptalism, meritocracy, and inst veo The ao; hanced ne hose hr “uncomfortable seats. Aside from pee prot thstear alls smn wom foil Carr Hall 103 twas prety comfortable! The lights are ays fl ike the room a ust {skingme to seep there [0.510] Robarts, 12th floor "hate ral this my onl coment lo/10} if By Pratt ‘andlor silent study room, slid nap. [asirol Weare also tied, and we areal n various ats of wellness and unveliness However think the knowledge ofthat ates tall soem aie less daunting. We reall connected by an invisible string pring us together feom one nap spot on amps to another. highlights from my sad he/they playlist “in case of poor mental health, break glass” tyler riches 0 with the sun suddenly seting at apm and Final season approach h break as. eteenscsneme well dint elect mv of songs that might appeal dierent fobs. fyou would bike to Susie othe al experience, ‘hook out Bere! je! st Lacy some rps fan, in th mde fom the wreck ralgh movie {tales anyway this the itr to that song, seems tf well athe rst Song ‘onthis it husele-eestiv, «bit ‘hinged and reminds me of my first-ever reading wceh i it yea when ced falingastep n my old childhood Dadom vibes“ e ribs-lorde @ s las tht needs no introduction. fs Sascats, wetting ol? fe rw ico tothe Back parade -my ae another clastic; the fist note of this song willsend any emo kd spiraling, resin Ine ofthe five hour drive to sigonuin Provincial park in 2015 with my family, ‘where stone to thi abn on repeat and stared out the window came out to ‘ny patents two days later thank met vw cherry wine-live-hosier a lend recently cowed me this song and te theres justsomething about her fnce awa twee that aid whore psy other sing Uke tise" ibe ye ‘shat they sa landstide - fleetwood mac ok so this song actully reminds me ofthe ‘michel keaton version oF jack est Beeause it plas daring realy mad part of the mae S91 reminds me of edad ‘movi, which automatically adds the sad ‘astalgefactor to the playlist pla syst 2 beaut song. your love (deja vu) - stripped back. lass animals snyone who knows me el know fn Hass animals tan. “yur love a 8)" {Nready an emotionally change song about ‘bad teatonship where you tow that iellkeep hurting you, bat you kep letting that person back in: abou being acto tosomething self-destructive and + ‘ripped back version? you got me thers ‘efntely recommend tis one ‘dream -imagine dragons somany people slander imagine dragons nd wilt stand fort he smoke rirrorsalbam eared me trough sy Bolger coset inded depression long ‘thay chanical omanseras weve {Eseuned)- dont ely Know bow to ges this tha than emer steing in aigut 2015 ona dock by the grand ve, staring int te net ON Wy 4 sury-mae miller frst ip, mae illo. j onl jas sisered is misc thi ang lot of the songs ‘pbeat but this song iso chil vearming. ane has a beat voi, thonkermae «3 ungel down -work tape - lady a foo! ke people slept on lady g's Jeune albus ange dun plat the an he work tie version just re rowness to thecmoten, iat red back sous. also have a Handing on dock by the ‘haten nator at nightie Histening to ths song in thecal of mid-november ts bt dock rated memories eppaet all to0 well (0 minute version) apt’ wersian) Grom the eal) sesofeoarse ied this. is the talk of nan these days! and there’ short lin ve never actly experienced heartbreak hut when do tis wil detntely be the fst song in my hearbresk-rvener-arsenal tos. sift, defintely outdid here again, good for * VOUEXIS DETAIL Fottow, Don't Get S.A.D,, wasn” Get R.E.D. (Taylor’s Version)! lucy stark Sotoday cred in Fung. As Isat there, Seng th thy as apne a Ary my already paper-dry skin, I was able {olmmedtatey eam myself down with one Sng thoupht Red (Taylor's Version) is jist clickaway’ So yes pressed "Shull and no, didn't stop ening. But 1 ‘wat now eying sbout Taylors problems ‘nd Twas ROW pretending ews me ‘Sung in dake enya peng at ‘vith rnd blossng my hair, but emotional ——— __Taezage weighing dowa th youthful sparkle in my eye. RED. = Romantic, Emo, Death. Isa three course melodie meal to aesompany Jour hormonal exam-induoed, why sesnow-in-November fits of pssion, nxt. wonder, and more, “ut choose a ong fom the emotion Seat ve most needing to fel and/or oppress by ving throtgh commane che’ saratve Romantic: ein Again” {might've listened to this on my way tothe first date Tve gone on in ages sa perfect oundrack to dealize yours ocking ‘jet witha best stranger in Rezes, 2 ‘tconi-hand bookstore ron the TTC That it ok oa ye \whthvind romance. I'youve been loc {ip emotionally forthe whole pandemic this one ean help you Begin Apa. or ast Star watching Gilmore Gieisagain “Stay tay tay Hehe. that was so fn." Taylor ends this sweet tune with ail chuckle ts simple Dt’ eal bat it gets the fuck stack ‘Atnelunch, seer Ferg ma again {originally elated to this one when thad a tw day Love affair with the hottest boy in high schoo, He revealed his felings for ime at my 1th bthdsy (boas we were Siting infront ofthe bonfire when he did) and then the next day'im schoo, he voided all eye cotact, Loving him wos Tike driving down a dead ond street. Dead tend Beene he was too preocepied with ‘moving from emotional maniptation 0 ‘one of my tends to another Emo: Noxhing New” ‘When you're feeling washed up atage 22 (ora ageatter 19) Bot dont worry, Phoebe Bridgers and Taylor Swift leo fs inadeuate an experience inoster “The Lucky One™ When youre feeling washed up at age 40 (or when yu ae preempiively imaging what youl be ike aa middle-age former op sa ‘Berything Has Changed Everything, thats, except for how well Ea Sheeran and Taylors vtces complement, fone another. Rd might ve slipped a i on hisrecet ingles, but this one stays reminding you ofthe childhood, neighborhood romance you either had or Aeeplydeseedto have dst watch the Iutievideo fyou want to painfully ong, forelementay school days and also to see what Taylor and Eas children woe lok Tike “The Last Time” Aesential duet. “TIL be Gary you be Taylor The words exchanged between fiends who Know they wont hit the notes coarsely but will act out paint Separation stan Osear-wothy level, NEW TO TOWN WITH A MADE-UP NAME Just realiged everything Usted in this ategory isa duct dees two-person Soraization make mesad bomuse 1 know Tiinever beable ofall i ove with someone ina shared musica number? Ze cA mE UF Sonu UST TO HENAN “Deaths ‘All Too Wel A pecectl crafted masterpiece The one that you grew up screaming the visto with your Dada he drove sou home from School as you bonded with neve frends in residence during fist year, and yo an those fiends went to Karaoke 2 years ater You know i's always there in our Adovenloaded maui rary forthe nights you needa shower ery o the days where ‘ou life i to boring so vou need to pretend Jack Glen ida show up to $our ist birthday. ts therefor you, unt Aeath do yo part “A Too Well (Go Minte Version)” “Taylor decided to murder us ll fuck the Daltrirehy, and dance in the kitchen in the Ieftigeratoe lights hy releasing the original tominute version ofA Tao Well She put the pane cain th he muse i. Wile orignal Tot brother sister ides ‘rom Sadie and lan acting the g 3 5 & 7 s argument interlude rally deeply brought Ine bak othe tribe realty thats ‘motional abusive boyfriends with Terrible hareute and all-around grease vibes 1 Bet YourThink About Me’ Categorized under Death" fortwo ‘reasons: (1) Blake Lively’ directing ablitis im the mas video vl il you ‘nd make you question your previously hel belie that beautiful people can't be tistical talented and havea good sense ‘of humor and als be directed aa (2) ‘Whoever she wrote thi about is probably holding Rina for thet eo, S <—— these songs arent enough, don't worm therearea WHOPPING THIRTY TOTAL, © ® SONGS ON THIS ALBUM. One sone fo teach day of November Hangin he seid, Avant Gar Wait Isabella Persaud Wait. Hang on alittle longer, dear friend; for the life you've deemed so difficult - so tiresome and treacherous and depressing and desolate and dark is not ready to be left behind, for there are little things, of an infinite amount that will restore your faith in humanity, in yourself. Wait for the tight, protective hug from your mother, the sweet scent of cider wafting through your favourite bakery, the erupting sound of laughter from your best friend, the first snowfall of winter, the good grade, the discovery of your missing keys -- perhaps you'll remember the time a stranger paid for your morning coffee or the time you swung so high in the park you thought your legs might just touch the summer sun. ‘And even though you've screamed and cried and loved and lost and stood and fallen and tried and failed over and over again, you'll pull yourself out of the grave you've dug for yourselt. ‘Wait. open to close eunice zeng when your heart breaks there is a sound like crunching eggshell between your teeth the biggest pieces go into a plastic takeout box with a few drops of blood to keep them safe the light of your heart squirms around the glimmering glass dust when you find other pieces, under the couch or fallen out of your reusable tote bag slip them in the pocket next to your pens for later you'll find gold too and melt the cracks of the empty cai back together SPECIAL GUESTS: BAGS & COCO , Gargoule

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