WHICH GREENSKIN ARE YOU?
This personality test (or smash-o-meter) has been
designed by our (cracked) team of psycho-
engineers. It is configured, through probing
questions, confounding magical intuitions, and
serious mojo-ridden juju incantations to identify
your favoured methods of conquering,
PART ONE
WRITE THE ANSWER THAT MOST APPEALS TO YOU IN THE SPACE PROVIDED
Question One:
How do you best like to attack a foe?
1) Yellin’ Waaagh! and then smashin’ ’em ’ead on!
After all, you want them to see you coming so they can put up their
best fight!
2) Hit ’em, then hit ’em again. Send some uvvers around da
side to hit ’em from that way too. Then, when they are all
dead…hit ’em a few more times.
It’s really all about hitting with you, isn’t it?
3) Whichevva way they is least expectin’ ’cos there is more
than one way to stomp a stunty, krump a ’umie or skin a
skinny!
So long as the foe is crushed, it doesn’t matter which method you
employ to do so.
4) Shoot ‘em from a distance and then finish ’em off
The best enemy is one that dies before he ever gets close to you!
5) Ambush ’em, stun ’em and then hit ’em from behind!
When the foe is confused and doesn’t know which way to turn is
when you’ll deliver the knockout blow.
6) I prefer to make peace overtures and open up new, as of
yet, untried lines of communication.
Not everything has to be a fight, you know.
Answer: ___________
Question Two:
After crushing a foe in battle, what do you most
like to do?
1) Look fer da next victim…
It’s all about the fighting… if you’re not fighting, then you should
be busy looking elsewhere for something else to fight.
2) Git a few survivors, skin ’em or chop off their beards an’
send ’em back to where dey came from.
If you get your foes angry enough, they’ll charge right back into you
– meaning you don’t have to march so much. ... and even if they
don’t, the torment is good fun!
*Naturally, greenskins are erratic, so this test isn’t infallible, but it has been proven to be 100% accurate when it is, and not so much when it isn’t.
and therefore pointing towards what kind of
Warboss you are. Will you be identified as a sneaky
gobbo type, a hard-fighting Black Orc, or a wily
commander who can switch between ‘em both.
It will also tell you which legendary Orc or Goblin
character you most resemble.*
3) Fink ’bout da next fight – yer gotta ‘ave a plan…
Its no good just charging straight onto the next fight, you need to
figure out which ‘next fight’ will do you the most good and then
charge in…
4) Pile up a heap o’ loot, watch da ladz go crazy and order a
monument of Gork (or maybe Mork) to be built!
Enjoying the spoils of war and commemorating your latest victory
is what it is all about, isn’t it? It will certainly ensure the hordes
are on your side next time!
5) Victory celebrations – watching your minions joyously
fight over loot!
Keep an eye on any who aren’t praising your name. Have them
slain, as they’ll only be more trouble later.
6) Set up a good, defensible camp and reconnoitre the area.
Establishing a good base camp and gathering information is the only
way to go.
Answer: ___________
Question Three:
You’ve lost the battle, what do you do?
1) Dat never ’appened – an if it did, yer would smash da
cowards dat let themselves git beaten!
It is, frankly, inconceivable that you might lose so this question just
makes you angry and want to hit whoever suggested that you might
lose…
2) Beat any uppity ’uns so everyone knows oo is da boss.
Temporary setbacks are inevitable – you just have to ensure your
Warriors have your back (and aren’t about to stab you there).
3) Look for da foe to stretch out his neck too far – if yer
ready, yer can pounce on ‘em as they advance…
Sometimes the easiest foes to ambush are the most self-confident ones
– you can even spin it later like you ran away on purpose in order
to lure the foe more deeply into your carefully laid trap.
4) Send in more of yer gits!
A single loss here or there won’t stop your momentum – especially if
you send in another army (this time, maybe from the side or rear)
to teach your foes a lesson.
5) Exploit everything ya can!
Keep an eye out for any openings that might open up – after all,
now might be a good time for a counter-attack OR a time to blame
the loss on any underlings you don’t like. This was probably all a
test, after all, you’d never be so foolish as to lose an army you
couldn’t afford to lose!
6) Pull back and establish a fighting perimeter.
Finding good defensive ground is imperative.
3) Givin’ da ladz a piece of yer mind…
Sure, it might include a few kicks and boots, but givin’ da Ladz a
good talkin’ too keeps their fightin’ spirit up.
4) Enjoyin’ da spoil heaps!
There is much to do after a thumping good victory. There are skulls
to stack, riches to heap in piles, architectural feats to topple over (to
hear the sound they make!), hoarded liquors to chug, and plenty of
meat to eat.

5) Plottin’, setting traps and (in yer spare time) pluckin’

Answer: ___________ beards outta live stunties.
Everyone needs a little time for scheming

6) Establishing a good system for growth and expansion.

Question Four: Finding ways to grow, learn and prosper – perhaps the
If you could fight against anyone you wanted, establishment of universities or learning institutions?
whom would you pick?

1) It doesn’t matter – just keep ’em coming! The more Answer: ___________
da better!
So long as it’s a fight, what does it matter? Sure, a change of pace is
nice, but really, so long as you can fight all day it’s a good thing. Of
course, the harder the foe, the better the battle will be, but quantity PART T WO
has a quality all its own. READ THE STATEMENT AND WRITE THE NUMBER
2) Stunties! Or maybe Elves, ’cos dem skinny pointy-eared
THAT BEST MATCHES YOUR FEELINGS ON THE

types need a good bashin’

MATTER IN THE SPACE PROVIDED

The bearded ones are tough but predictable, and you know just how Question Six:
to bring ‘em down. But Elves are good to ’krump too. It doesn’t There is great artistry in a cleverly laid ambush.
really matter, does it?
1) I’d rather fight!
3) Da foe that we have the most to gain from.
Whether it is loot, prestige or tactical advantage – beating the right 2) Who cares?
foe at the right time just sets you up for more victories (and gets
more greenskins recruited to your cause). 3) Agree

4) Anybody smaller ’n us. 4) Strongly Agree

Bullying is ok, so long as you’re the ones doing the pushing
around… 5) I didn’t hear you as I’m too busy planning to stab you in
the back
5) Anybody ooo isn’t lookin’!
Actually if your best mate turned his back on you its possible you’d
stab him just by reflex. Really, it’s all about taking what is offered. Answer: ___________
Look, what’s that over there?

6) No foe at all.
Being at peace is the best reward. Question Seven:
The weaker and weedier an enemy, the better.

Answer: ___________ 1) Strongly Disagree

2) Disagree

Question Five: 3) A win is a win

Besides fighting, what else do you like to do?
4) Agree
1) Wot you mean, besides fightin’?
The mere suggestion of not fighting makes you want to fight… 5) Strongly Agree

2) Sumfing sporting – like bettin’ on how many stunties 6) I have no foes

a Squig can eat, or watching a few Giants in a stunty
tossin’ contest.
There is much to appreciate in the suffering of others… Answer: ___________
Question Eight:
Nothing beats the blood-
splattering joy of close combat

1) Strongly Agree

2) Agree

3) Victory is best

4) Its good, but the loot is the best part

5) It probably means the ambush failed

6) Disagree

Answer: ___________

Question Nine:
I want to slay my own army
when I see them run from
a fight.

1) Never happens

2) Strongly Agree

3) Agree

4) Disagree

5) Strongly disagree – It was my plan!

6) I never fight

Answer: ___________

Question Ten:
It isn’t worth your time to cut
off stunty beards and make a
standard out of them.

1) Too busy fighting to be worried

about stuff like that

2) Get gobbos to do it for me

3) It’d be OK

4) It’d be good

5) I want five of them!

6) That might hurt them?

Answer: ___________
 SCORING
ADD UP THE TOTALS OF ALL YOUR ANSWERS AND CONSULT THE CHART BELOW
TO SEE WHAT KIND OF GREENSKIN COMMANDER YOU ARE!
Score
Below 10 Thick Skulled & Pea Brained
Like many greenskins (particularly Orcs) you
are challenged by basic mathematics. Unless
you skipped questions you can’t actually score
below 10. If you scored below 3 then you are
in the Troll-brained category, a calibre of
commander who has lots to learn. The famed
commander you most resemble is Grud, an
Orc whose skull was found to be completely
solid, without so much as a speck for brains.
10 Brutal and Extremely Fighty
You are bloodthirsty and full of battle and
tolerate no nonsense from your followers. You
take no prisoners and only stop fighting when
your foe is dead and no longer twitching. This
is a common score amongst Black Orc
Warbosses and the ’arder, meaner sort of
Orcs. It is probable that you will be
outthought and outmanoeuvred, but it is
never possible to outfight you. Whether that
always wins the day? Who knows, but there is
gonna be some fighting! The famed
commander you most resemble is
Grimgor Ironhide.
11 - 20 Brutal
You are cut from the same mould as the
classic Orc commander – a bash first and ask
questions later type (whereas a Brutal and
Extremely Fighty doesn’t ever ask questions!).
There is no problem you can’t solve with a
good blade, boot kick, or knee to an opposing
groin. The famed commanders that also fit
this profile are Morglum Necksnapper and
Gorfang Rotgut. Any who don’t fear you are
either dead, or really really big.
21 - 35 Brutal, but Cunning
In the long run this is perhaps the most
dangerous type of greenskin commander of all
– one who is able to bash through anything,
but doesn’t feel compelled to do so if there is a
smarter way to get the job done. You will use
whatever tools are needed or at hand – that
could mean attacking with numbers, shooting
the foe to pieces or a straight up krumpin’. Or
sometimes a mix of all three. The most
infamous Orc Warboss of all time, Gorbad
Ironclaw was just this sort of menace and his
name is still spoken of in hushed tones.
36 - 45 Cunning, but Brutal
This score represents a ‘thinkin’ greenskin’
who will more often substitute brainpower
over brawn, far preferring to configure a way
to flank a foe, shoot them from afar, or launch
some kind of one-two punch that will catch a
foe off guard. This is mostly, but not always,
the gobliny way of fighting, as their natural
spite (and gangly limbs) gravitates towards
these kinds of advantages. Make no doubt
about it though, when push comes to shove,
the fangs will be bared and all manner of rip-
roaring violence unleashed. You just know its
better to do so if your foe is already a bit shot
up and bleeding. Grom the Paunch of Misty
Mountain is perhaps the most famous
Warboss of this ilk, as he was large enough to
wreak havoc by himself, yet his mostly Goblin
legions were sometimes a bit too weedy for too
many straight up fights.
46 - 50 Diabolically Shifty
The term low-down backstabber doesn’t sink
low enough to fully encapsulate the depths
you are willing to sneak to in order to achieve
your victory. Ambushes, secret weapons, and
any manner of unfair advantages are second
nature to you. To you, a fair fight is one that
you wouldn’t want to be near. This is a
devious mind – often one of a Goblin or
Night Goblin who has been exposed to the
underhanded ways of the Skaven! The
Warboss who best exemplifies this
commanding style is the infamous Skarsnik,
Warlord of the Eight Peaks. He is crafty
beyond compare, his plots far-reaching and
his utter malice unmatched. Yet he is not
alone; a whole legion of especially wicked
Warbosses have been inspired by his great
works and are right now plotting away…
Over 50 Very Suspect
To score over 50 you either can’t add OR,
you have chosen a 6 as any answer.
Greenskins that choose a single 6 are instantly
suspect – perhaps you’re a gutless ’umie in
disguise OR you have been corrupted and
de-Orcified by some mystic means… We
aren’t sure you resemble any greenskin
commander, but there was one who ‘went a bit
off’ – the great Azhag the Slaughterer. There
are rumours that Azhag the Slaughterer was
controlled by a magical crown that granted
him superior intelligence (and accounted for
his strange use of grammar, etiquette and
occasionally mind-boggling complex tactics).
We’ve got our beady red eyes on you…