P A P E R Q U I L T

Your Responses from APRIL 29, 2011 Black Women’s Blueprint

WHAT CAN WE DO TO END SEXUAL ASSAULT IN OUR COMMUNITIES?

We can address cultural attitudes about women, power, control, gender roles. End rape culture. End the culture of violence. Fund programs that really prevent rape. Acknowledge we have this issue in our community and stop defending black men who commit this crime against our sisters, mothers and babies.

Education and Community Outreach. You have to meet people where they are. Develop a curriculum of information; Define sexuality; Define violation—what is it? How individualized it is, mothers, sisters, brothers, fathers, all have individualized sexuality. Target public schools and make it part of sexual education. Face the fact. The research shows it. 1 out of 20 men said they would rape a woman if they could get away with it. They took the poll willingly and said it.

Have open, honest conversations in safe spaces so that both genders are able to fully express understanding, compassion and healing.

Explain to people what is and what is not sex. Rape is not sex.

We have to impress upon older men (45+) the importance of mentoring young men. We have to change the ‘”Mack” “Pimp” & “Player” culture. I will make it my business to make change first with myself and to other men close to me. TALK !!! LISTEN!!! Be open!

Acknowledge that sexual assault affects all genders in profound social and psychological ways. Create a safe space to discuss sexual assault through methods that give individuals their mental and emotional power back. Then you fight it.

Begin discussing it with teenagers in and out of school. More mentoring programs for young women and young men. Increase counseling services. Develop awareness campaigns.

Discuss that it’s not just about here and now. Help people think of the future effects. Rapists create other rapists in their victims, and in those who see and experience this rape culture we live in. Men and women rapists are created! by other rapists or by rape culture. TWO-THIRDS OF FEMALE SEX OFFENDERS WERE THEMSELVES MOLESTED REPEATEDLY AND ONE-QUARTER OF MALE SEX OFFENDERS WERE MOLESTED AT LEAST ONCE. 92% of sex offenders are male. Work with those with control over media portrayals of both men and women.

I will promote sex positive dialogue and culture.

Call people out on their stuff. Hold people accountable. Don’t be afraid to speak up! Create dialogue groups. Start young.

Create commercials and advertisements defining what sexual assault is.

Neighborhood forums-indirectly and directly defining sexuality and individualized thing to be thought on the same level as one right to all God-given things.

I speak to my sons 20 and 18 and their friends about sexual assault, sexual violence and DV and health relationships all the time.

We need to talk about it. Men can stop sexual assault if they want to. Power and control manifests itself in every way and women are speaking truth to power about it. Go to the churches. Teach the pastors to address sexual assault with their congregations. Go to the Mosques. Teach the Imams how to address sexual assault in their congregations.

Recognize that we are all a part of the problem and therefore can be a part of the solution.

Eliminate gender stereotypes by teaching boys and girls about healthy relationships at a young age.

Stop teaching our young men and women (explicitly and implicitly) that women’s value is determined by her sexuality and her body.

Let the community hold men accountable for committing rape. Like a restorative justice program where rapists know that community will not let them get away with it.

Stop feeling sorry for rapists. Can we teach our young women and men that? Do more research on why men rape. Figure it out for real and go shout it out. Challenge people to action.

Mothers and daughters need to tell each other what can really happen on college campuses, on dates, at friends’ houses. Mothers need to stop acting like their sons are kings but their daughters are not queens. Your sons need to also be good enough for a girl out there, not just the other way around.

We can end rape if we just stop blaming the victim.

Write, speak, sing, dance, preach, film, rhyme about the myths and facts about rape. Do it until people get the message. Some of the myths about rape keep people in the same place of denial. To rape is a decision. To rape is an abuse of power the rapist already has. Rapists already have privilege and to rape is an abuse of that privilege. Rapists don’t rape because they’re so oppressed they don’t know what to do with themselves. Teach that. Stop making excuses for rapists. Rape is an exercise of power by the rapist whether black, white, middle-eastern, asian, latino or otherwise, already has. Teach that.

Place value on our girls and stop acting like our girls are doing alright. They’re not.

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