The lyrics were written by

extracting sentences from the

top of pages in John Boyne's
novel The Heart's Invisible
Furies then adapting/reordering
them, in May/June then writing
the music in July.
 Invisible Heart
voice + piano / range: G3-G5 / duration c. 27' Matthew Lee Knowles
1

May - July 2021

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Long be fore my neigh bour's mo ment ac cross this place, with it be tween

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his fin gers, he stood up no mat ter how in

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va lu able, for two pence in a cou ple of ho urs, to show me

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some thing, want to know what I do? I cooked him and dad dy

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threw me 'cos I'm a bad lad/gal, ac cus tomed to the mock ing in my head, in my mo ther's o pi nion I

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should have drowned, do you two know each o ther? The bleach of the bus ses in my nose and in the air,

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my mo ther took a feel of me, the boy needs a wash o ver she says,

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as mi nutes went by, I pushed her of

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course, I looked ac cross, down and stan ding up,

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some Ger mans got him, this could work, they give her gui dance and chewed her ear,

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but it did n't come in mid Au

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gust, have n't I been watch ing you?

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He breathed a sigh a gainst my mo ther, And stared at her, she said

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49 3 3 optional lower harmonies: backing singer/pianist

no thing, she said no thing, "get down you have the wrong place,

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get off him" he's back in his lo cal,

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where he first met the mi ni ster with no chi ld ren, she un der stood
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ful ly that he had to ac cuse some one, a stut ter came from my an xi e ty.

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Shoes di sturbed the woo den floor be sides my un made bed, I have ex pres sion
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in her stu dy, when it oc curred to me that it's de fi nite ly big ger,

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my mo ther's con ver sa tion is con fi dent,

92

"do you have a fa sci na ting light?" I think you'll en joy tur ning

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in your sleep, you, in your com mit ted vic tim's

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cha rac ter, i ma gine find ing your mo ther walk ing

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through the door,

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ap proa ching the oc ca sions when the wealth chan ges back.

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Her ci ga rettes speak your lan guage un der neath the desk,
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we laughed and held on to it whilst eat ing, the o ther end was

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mis con strued well, now to spill who e ver heard me o pen my eyes,

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126

do you need a hug af ter the guests leave? I know she was the

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pre da tor, but what do con clu ded dreams e ven mean? Go ing to wards fa shion
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can help you, I stared at the book a day a fter sen ten cing men,

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vi o lence hap pi ly e ver a fter,

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act ual ly his fa ther lived

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with ma ny lan gu ages, with clear blue eyes, clip ping me,
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his tooth brush in my room, on a load of com plete ly dif frent le vels,

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get faster q = 152

we paused for a mo ment.

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An nounce ment of hi sto ry, art a voi ded a na ly sing,

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164

if that's what you mean.

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Let me wipe that

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note book, the vir gin must have been de ba ting to di splay,

183

in the tea room, how those days trem bled,

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with him sit ting there o nly be

191

cause your fa ther was a trai tor,

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death fi nal ly kicked in for good luck,

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in a pub where I sat

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and told you to jump be

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fore frown ing, that's

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not my stand ard,

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it does n't e ven mean you liked that it would be here,

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it was al most too much to re sist slap ping not ta king the heat, the squir rel re minds her

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of your eyes, the so li ci tor wants his a dop tive fa ther, why do pe ople of such minds mind?

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223

It made me grab and sim ply want to tell,

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227

it seems my so li ci tor o pened my eyes,

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I have some thing she must have known,

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I know how he fi nal ly is sued in

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237

struc tions, they pay an an nounce ment in this af fai r,

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grow ing a lone and swal lo wing hard, his lips par ted, al though loo king at what he called
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to ne, o ur sup po sed mul ti tu din ous al most fell, why should I not stare?

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Ple ase tell me! I said Je sus wept, well where do you think I am? The cir cum stan ces were

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of course stamped, af ter peo ple ad dress them at once,

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being with out her right for a mo ment of wea ring next to no thing,
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a cu ri ous me lange of mor ta li ty.

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I had no i de a, well I could n't do that, "I don't think that's quite ac cu rate"
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she warned me, I had ac qui red a se ri ous girl friend,

276
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in a ca thre dal of young, of skin, which was meant to be nice, hold him like

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280 q = 132
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the key in to the lock, you could stay la ter when he was gone and

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284
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we could do it, the door a gain as if I was com plete, I don't like my girl friend,

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I'm a good lad, there's some thing 'bout see ing, I don't know what an ex tra three pence makes,

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292
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a few weeks la ter the me di a were parked there.

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296

299

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Parked there.

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310 q = 112
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Sir! I did n't blow a ny one but I'm not sure that's true,

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312

you can't fi re me in time so down with his trou sers,

314

she works fast so I'll give you three I am hol ding it tigh tly, you've no need, I said no thing
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to you both, I could n't go back, what did you want to say?

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320
extremely free

I rolled my eyes be cause you know ex act ly the same thing,

321

stan ding by a wall I had o nly e ver had sex a bove his fore head,

322
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we did it be fore I could e ven move, her face was in her hands as she stared at me.

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I cried well as I ar rived at my flat, I was

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pro ba bly safe, his hands be hind his head like being back

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331
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at school.

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335
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 23
341 with a powerful driving energy!
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An xious brush strokes a few months earl ier, had com mon sex, he oc

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344

ca sion al ly glanced, I felt ut ter ly un com for ta ble, but let me get this straight,

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my path to his si ster, oh no sor ry, the teac her's po si tion when we got out of there was of no

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ques tion, I've ne ver e ven tried, I've ne ver e ven tried,
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ne ver e ven tried to play, ne ver sub si ded,

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since I walked in here, right now my mo ther

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likes you a ny way, they right them selves and

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you have much to say a bout their friends,

368 extremely free

won de ring whe ther sor ry is in and out of it self, a gainst me he has sex,
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we should go, would you like to have a fa mily talk? Yes of course, give me your phone num ber.

372
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How did we all get here, by chance on a night out? He's got to pop, it should be im por tant.

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374 q = 92
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He's en gaged now so shut up and get off the ground, shop ping bags marked on the safe

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379
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side, I mean I'm sor ry I said and they stared just at me, I en tered slow ly with

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26 384 q = 132
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my si ster down wind of course. What's the mat ter? But he would n't come out of it, he turned a

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390

way, I don't know if he laughed, I laughed in dis be lief be cause she loves you, down that road

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at that ta ble in that cor ner get ting a few pints, I knew I should have gi ven

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him no one. Diffe rent states in de pen dent of my will,

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all de lu ding my self, see the horse where I had once lived, be low there you see a crowd

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that had gath ered, I could see up there but he flinched, both or dered to make in tro duc tions,

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you must be stripped quick ly to form some mu scu lar type,

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the two mugs, joy ful and un ex pec ted, a spice com pa ny with no laugh ter,

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of a ve ry sim ilar build I had for got ten we stu di ous ly of

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428
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fered art gal le ries our selves, we a voi ded just be cause,

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432

well, you have n't missed much through it all still friends with a glass a mo ment la ter,

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al ways tel ling me that the pain is too much, had she e ver cared? They passed us with tour ists

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442 q. = 60 29
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to just leave him there, tur ning to me though I see it was o nly two hun dred you're hard ly old

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446 q = 132
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but what's your name? The war knocked andlooked clo ser, well may be I just nee ded to

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450
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eat, but why with some Rus sian? I don't owe you

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454
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a ny thing, you've been fuck ing him, yes? I said no thing,

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just poin ted at a dy ing girl in a door way,

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his chan ces star ing, just o pe ning the boot e very Wednes day

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dan ger's way is e ven worse.

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We frigh tened the straight chor e o gra pher, in the res tau rant I could n't

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name that stays that way, he's not stu pid he just stares a lot, at old cows then

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ba si cally shrugs, his mo ther says a ny thing then turns to look at me,

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493
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nine teen peo ple this year she said lean ing stron ger to wards our neigh

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bours but none of us have it yet, but no self con trol so I al

500
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ways fe el un com forta ble I loved e ven tual ly turn ing

un comf 'ta ble

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to my self a gain, I can't be gin to des cribe how I

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got it five mi nutes la ter,

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she took a car ton, ve ry a na ly ti

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cal, ve ry smoke y, you can al ways send

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me to your chi ld hood home,

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I think real ly they take some thing on the side that does n't go a round, he talks to the pa tient,
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wal king down a thought, life sud den ly be gins to pul sate, I'm sor ry, yes the file,

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528
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I stepped in side and came in to my mind ve ry dif frent ly dif frent ly, and why would

532

I have ne ver had i ma gi nings i ma gi nings, you were ve ry much

536
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loved, this thing was so im por tant, he could have talked words that are not true,
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fuck my blood press sure be cause I don't want them to know, so you're say ing it's my fault,

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how? Look tell me I'm not well, I was n't sure you nee ded more sleep, I thought a

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bout it and I made my way, he blinked, there's still time, what's he

560

like?

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571

q. = 82
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You vi si ted him when you were ob sessed,

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lea ping to my feet I he si ta ted not, dur ing the ear ly game, your
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fa ther was a jo vial young man, thou sands of pounds through out my

[q = 120]
591 ad lib.
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years, when you worked here you were frigh tened of death too, oh, they're the worst ones,

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596
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some gay fel la, I've ne ver real ly gi ven it much thought, in some cheap flat I

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601
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can't re call, no he died, I shrugged.

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607 q = 122
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Do you mind, these small white ta bles? I am fine

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612

you should con gra tu late me, what was it she called it? No well you

q = 112 thoughtful, reflective, beautiful, free with time

618

do that. We were do ing life, we were do ing life. We were do ing life, we were do

626

ing life. We were do ing life, we were do ing life. We were do ing life, we were do ing life.
635 optional repeat, as written or with freedom/elaboration 39

We were do ing life, we were do ing life. We were do ing life, we were do ing life.

q = 92 [q. = 60]
643
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Old age did n't ne ces sa ri ly come for all, young lads turned for ty nine,

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649
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diffe rent types will make mo ney, all her friends

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653
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should have gone, had laid eyes on you, try ing to sa bo tage you in a

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40 659
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bar, but how was I to know? It's been years since I was

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664
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caught sit ting and ta king a pho to graph, pho to graph, jump ing up and down

668
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on my eigh teenth birth day, I had put this down, of

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672
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course, to the re ti re ment par ty, but as it turnedout, sor ry,

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677 retenu 41
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I will do ex act ly that, why would n't I? I told you yes but o nly a lit tle bit.

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685

695 q = 112

Deep thrills hand out the me dals to ge ther,

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701
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not in to gay la bels, just good con ver sa tion, three years al though you're right,
42 708

is that a no ther one of your jokes? Most peo ple run and run, did your wife men tion

3 3

717

that? He told me and we're e ven think ing I'll try re sist, she said that he'd

723

worked in Am ster dam, mum said no thing more of the sum mer of two thou

728

sand and one, I'm sure I was n't act ual ly pre sent then, we must e ven tually try find ing
734 43

our selves twe nty one years ear li er.

739

You know of course I do

745

and if some one showed you up, I'm not sor ry, I re mem ber the pic ture, you felt a

752

lit tle shi ver, your teeth were mis sing, you reached out a hand, and I ne
44 759

ver did as well as I used to, sound ing half out raged, sor ry to di sap point you, don't be so de fen

767
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sive, would you get a way? She was talk ing but you cer tain ly don't need her mo ney,

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772

the sound was mu ted so I turned to her, she seemed to

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777

be fal ling from the win dow, o pen ing

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secco
781 45

pre sents ho ping to see some one

784

I sup pose, I sug ges ted that may be you just should n't buy a ny,

787
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let's not talk re li gion, but she did not shut up, did you e ver get to see it?

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791
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Well be qui et like we'd known each o ther, what's that like? Al most as much as...

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46 795
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have you al ways been a lone? His pa rents left first that's

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798

all.

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It makes me like you, it took me there with o nly one per son, I don't care
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what's hap pened, no, but you will in time, peace like a shock of e lec tri ci ty

822
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ar ri ving, climb ing, thanks a bunch and how did it go, how did he take it?

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824
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I held a shrug, I took the bus a way, just a chance a way from him, we should have had se ven de cades,

827
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he's long gone, they loved me, they laughed, good, I don't want to know, he was so hand some,
48
830

have a word with them, loss of trou ble,

835

loss of a good man, I'm not pray ing

839

at this grave stone, I woke up loo king down,

844

I en joy an e nor mous te le vi sion which for no rea son was still go ing it was dif fi
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847

cult but you're still dead,one per son went up to his room, not all of them will be dif fi cult, us, dressed

850

in our fi ne ry, for his young er bro ther, know that chil dren are stand ing out side, grand chil dren stand

853

ing next to him, one hand touched my arm, eve ry one can get mar ried when I'm gone.