The Complete Idiot’s guide to the perfect marriage

I read this book “The Complete Idiots guide to the perfect marriage” and decided to chuck this book out the window !!! Why???? Because, in this 313 page book about the perfect marriage the word “love” doesn’t even make an appearance once. Which I thought was, very very strange. What I think is needed for a complete marriage is LUCK, GOODLUCK, in fact, tons of good luck. Do you know why I wish people good luck when they tell me about getting married? It’s because they need it. L-U-C-K - LOVE, UNDERSTANDING, COMMUNICATION and KNOWLEDGE - is needed for a great marriage. Let us, ummm…, let me, talk about Love. I decided that I was going to marry Vikram in the first 5 minutes of seeing him. It probably was Lust and not Love – nah just kidding – but I knew deep down that he was the perfect one for me. So when I got married to a perfect stranger and landed in this perfectly strange place far, far away from my protected life before, it was only love that kept me going through the good times and all the bad and very bad times of my past 6 years. When you have love and lust you have… kids….no, no, no….you have an Understanding, a mutual understanding of each other…I’m not talking about pre-nups here peoples, I’m talking about the feeling of ”2 journeys, one path”, “2 bodies, one mind” or as Bollywood puts it “2 hearts, one heartbeat”. It’s the ability to see the way your partner sees, understand the way he thinks and most importantly understand and appreciate the differences. Vikram and I are complete opposites in many ways – he talks less and thinks more whereas you know me I talk more and sometimes think less, he is very organized and I take great delight in disorder and chaos, he is a very private person and I’m a show pony, I’m an impulsive, risk-taker whereas he is more careful – but in spite of all that he can see where I’m coming from and vice versa. Since we understand each other well we are able to communicate with each other well. WRONG! I still remember the day when we took part in a communication game where we were seated back-to-back and asked to build an object with a few blocks of wood. We made the entire object identically, block-to-block but his object was in the vertical plane and mine was rested on the ground. Our communication was perfect but the vital piece of information that was not communicated broke the link. We have both joined Toastmasters in our eternal quest to be good communicators and are chipping away at it.

And last but definitely not the least you need knowledge – not the legal knowledge you need for getting a divorce – but the rather complicated know-how of the Law of Conservation of Energy in Physics. That law really says that you cannot create energy out of nothing and you cannot destroy energy. When applied to marriage it could be stated as - you cannot create energy in your marriage with nothing, you need to put in a lot of effort/time/money into it and once the positive energy is in it, it cannot be destroyed. So, all you need for a complete marriage is Good luck – good luck to find the right one and Good L-U-C-K and if you have both of them then you are the lucky one. I still don’t quite know what you need for a perfect marriage. But one day when I’m old, wise and toothless I probably would write “The Perfect Idiots guide to the complete marriage”. And now the surprise test on the speech – What will you wish Patrick if he told you he was getting married again? GOODLUCK!!!

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