Roxanne Therese O. Delay 150 2006- 27258 Ventura Prof.

Psyc hology


My o wn th eory of personality I. The Ind ividual Every individual carries a mask with them. And they have the control whether they would wear this mask or not when interacting with people. This mask is what we call the projected image of the individual which are the physical attributes an individual has or follows. Because of the projected image, an individual’s personality is affected, thus dividing the personality of a person into two.

a. Ex ternal Persona Since an is born with a mask, an individual uses this mask only when he/she has not yet become psychological mature enough to accept who he/she really is. An individual wishes to become someone else, but not totally diminishing his/her own self but tries to incorporate the attributes and traits he/she doesn’t have and thus creates his/her own projected image. An individual creates this projected image so as to get the approval of the society and to be one of them. The personality of the person here in this case where we will call it external personality then is influenced and worst, dictated by the society. But who dictates the society? Usually, these are the group of people who we look up to since these individual epitome “perfectness” in them. They

have established in our minds that we have to be perfect, so there is constant search for perfection, and to become to perfect, we have to imitate them. External personality conforms to the dictates of the society. b. Internal P ersona This is the real us, this is who we are. And the sad thing about it is that we try to hide them away from the scrutinizing eyes of the society. We don’t want them to see our weakness, our flaws. But the real truth is that we are weak by trying to conceal our real self. Only those who are psychologically mature enough will show the world who they really are and is not afraid to be the best they can be in their own way. We will let this personality rise within is if and only if we come to accept the real and us and be comfortable with the entire thing in us. We are contented with what we have, we feel secure since our emotions are stable, and no fears, worries and anxieties bother us. We can extend our self to others since we are selfless and hopes for the best in society. It doesn’t necessarily mean that internal personality is becoming non conformist. Internal persona doesn’t really care what society dictates or tries to become different. We just follow what we want to do that is not influenced by the agents of socialization of the society.
 The over-all personality of an individual depends on what persona is dominant on

the person. If the external persona is dominant, an individual then uses his/her mask most of the time and tries to view life as a play where pretensions, perfection should take place. He/she can only remove his/her mask if and only the play has already ended and comes in contact with person he/she considered part of his/her reality. If the internal persona is dominant, an individual never uses a

mask and views life as never a fantasy but reality where everyone are given the freedom to do what they want to do and at the same time be of service to one another.
 If external persona and internal persona are balance, an individual then uses mask

not all the time but only at certain situation. One views the world as a mix of reality and fantasy. There are times that he might be bothered by the need to search perfection but what happens is that he/she doesn’t see the search for himself/herself, rather, he/she sees it as a force for him/her to become a better individual of a community.


The Searc h for Perfec


Nobody is perfect but everyone tries to be perfect in their own way. But the problem is that “their own way” is not really “their own way” since it is influenced by the society. The mere idea of perfection is likewise dictated by the different agents of socialization. Each of these have different concept of perfectness. a. Family Family’s idea of perfection is becoming a perfect good son/daughter. A good son/daughter doesn’t simply mean of obeying our parents; it’s more of becoming a person our parents can be proud of. One who is educated, god-fearing, law abiding citizen, financially stable, happily married and is a good father/mother to his/her sons/daughters. Since we look up to our parents, we try to satisfy their expectations. For our family’s sake, we set aside our own dreams and pursue those of our parents just to make them happy.

b. Peers The idea of perfection on peers may not be as clearly define compared to other agents of socialization. However, they still play an important role in creating the projected image. For peers, a perfect friend is someone who is always there beside them, whether they are in trouble or not. A friend who is always on the go whenever there are gimmicks or parties to attend to. A great listener and conversationalist with a good sense of humor, he/she can stand the rants of his/her friends. We need to belong and our friends answer to this problem. Even though sometimes, we also have problems to deal with, we try to be there for them that sometimes it costs us our own time for ourselves. c. Re ligion The idea of perfection in here is guided by the doctrine of what religion you are in. If we are going to talk about Catholicism, the idea of perfection is to follow Jesus footsteps, the son of God. And to follow Jesus requires you to follow the Ten Commandments and the beatitudes. We try to live according to what Jesus has taught us even though we have our different perspective on living the ways of the God. We try to be perfect in the sense that we believe in God or God is with us by fulfilling our obligation in all ways even though for us, merely acknowledging God’s existence for us is good enough or it contradicts our other beliefs in life. d. Me dia The idea of perfection created by media is to become what the media shows in public. To become as perfect as the artists, TV reporters, DJs, VJs, model etc.,

perfection in the sense of being flawless physically and having a great fashion sense. We have to look, smell, feel and act like them. Physically, what is seen as perfect nowadays is having a white, flawless skin and having a tall model like figure. No matter how hard we try to be comfortable with ourselves, we are bombarded by what the media portrays. We are already happy with our “morena” skin but because of the media, we do our best just to look like the stars we idolize resorting to beauty enhancements. II I. Goals set ting Goals set by individuals differ according to what personality is dominant on them. Those whose external personality plays a more dominant role tends to set goals that are centered for an individual to reach perfection; thus sometimes creating impossible, unattainable, unimportant and short term goals. There are times that this individual gets what he/she wants in his/her life and maybe extremely happy and contented about it for now but there will come a time that he/she will want something more, a thing that leads him/her more to perfection. There will never be lasting contentment on the things he/she has in life. Contentment only exists temporarily. On the other hand, the goals set by individuals whose internal persona is dominant, the goals set are long term, possible and attainable difficult as it may be. Others oriented are the center of his/her goals and focuses more on how can he/she be of service to others. More often than not, his /her goal is simple enough yet carries a long lasting effect. Once the individual saw the fruits of his/her labor, he/she would want to do more not because the individual is not contented with what he/have done or how he/she reached the goal but because he wants to help more people and make a difference to other’s lives.

As for individuals with a balanced external and internal persona, their goal varies depending upon the mood and resources they have. They see to it that they will never over do and under do things, just enough for his/her self growth and the growth of others.


Childhood ex


Childhood experiences are essential in shaping the personality of the person. This will also determine what persona will be dominant to an individual. A person who had suffered a number of traumatic events in his/her life like sexual abuse, beatings, neglects, divorce of parents, rejection, loss will most likely to have his/her external persona becoming dominant. Due to this, the individual tries his/her best not let these events happen on him/her again by seeking perfection on himself/herself. Likewise, those who had experienced hard life when they were young would tend to have their external persona dominant since this individual has been opened to the truth that the only way to escape poverty is to become perfect and be one with the upper society. An individual is already fed up with the harshness of reality and now wants to reach the world of fantasy. There is the thirst for greatness and perfection due to the social-economic conditions he/she had when she was undergoing childhood. As for those who lived a life of childhood peacefully and were given everything he/she could ask for will most likely have his internal persona dominant since it was implanted on the mind of the individual that he/she is already contented and happy with the life he/she had and it’s now a time for him/her to share his happiness. Likewise, due to the fact that he/she got what he/she want when he/she was still a child, the daily monotony of life might already become a bore on him/her

and would like to explore the other world. Since he/she was born in a world of fantasy, an individual now wants to discover the world of reality.


Need s The needs of individual can be categorized into four: 1. Physical Needs – the need to satisfy basic needs and attain well being such as food, security, pleasure. 2. Emotional Needs – the need to be happy and emotionally stable that is away from woes, fears and insecurities. 3. Mental Needs - the need to feed one’s mind with ideas, knowledge and values. 4. Social Needs – the need of attachments and relationships to other people; the need to belong. These needs are the things should be satisfied by an individual so as to become closer in reaching his/her goals. Since the external and internal persona set goals different from each other, priority likewise differs. For external persona, the most important need to be satisfied is the physical needs, followed by mental needs, then social needs and lastly emotional needs.

As for internal persona, the most important need to be satisfied is the physical needs, then the social needs, emotional needs and mental needs. As for balanced persona, the most important need is the physical need. The rest goes random that depends on the goal set by the balanced persona.

It is obvious that physical needs are always seen as the most important need since it is a pre-requisite of the three needs. One cannot satisfy the other needs without satisfying his physical needs. As for external persona, since there is the search for perfection, physical needs and the mental needs are important since beauty and brains are the tickets one has to have so as to reach the upper society. Social then will follow since connections are important. Emotional needs are least prioritized since it doesn’t matter whether you are happy or not as long as you are perfect in the eyes of the society. Meanwhile internal persona has to satisfy social needs first since his/her goal is centered on becoming a productive individual of the community. He/she will serve as a role model by the ones he/she will help. Emotional needs will follow since after satisfying the happiness of others, one might as well satisfy his own happiness through the fruits of his/her labor. An intellectual mind is not seen as that important since heart is given much more importance. 

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