GENERAL PROFANITIES

FRENCH Tabernac = fuck Crist de caudis de tabernac = fucking Christ Ta peu, ta gros, pis toi mere naime pas = You stink, youre fat, and your mother doesnt love you. $5 dollar ass slapper alcoholic cuntmonkey Alexander McTwatWaffle anal aardvark anal dwelling butt monkey anal gaping twat fister armless gorilla stump-fucker armpit humper arse wank ass bandit ass blasting jism factory ass flicker ass glazing tit nozzle ass hamster ass munching son of a cuntbucket ass plaster monkey hole ass weasle asshole juggling rim jobber assless wonder assmangler extraordinaire ass-rapin zipper licker athletes cunt baby snatching cocksucker badger bagging clustercunt bag of dicks ball bag ass wipe ball sucking lizard-lipped jerk stick bandy handed snatchmagnet bastard son of a cuntwhore bastarding sodomist bear raping dolphin bejazzled spank-tassel bestial cuntduggary big blue hairy donkey dick Bill OReilly bird brained midget-pecker bitch bucket bitchass mother bucker bitchflippit Bitchy McWhinypants black toothed cackle ass Bitchy McWhinypants black toothed cackle ass blast ended skank bleeding monkey-cunt scab blistered ass-flaps bloody anal fissure Bloody Fuckity McFucktard bloody mattress ass print blue balled fuck-wit Bob Sagat bollocking wank wad boner biting bastard bork titted swizzle teats Boutros Boutros Ghali wanker boy butter baster bronzer basted testicle slinger brother-banging blow shits bug fucking shitweasel bukakke blaster bunt fuckler butt booger mother pincher butt fuck booktard butt knuckle butt monkey sinkhole butt trumpet camel fucking twuntsicle canine jizz lickers canyon cunt Captain Cunts carnivorous spooge-shooting carpetbomber carny jerker cat gerbiling cock hammer cheap ass douchenozzle Cheney-rimming scum slut choad mongering cunt muscle Christ on a crab-covered crutch chuckleheaded motherfucker chunder huffing colon spanker clit jockey clown fucker clunge cock banging son of a flatulent whore cock gobbling shit licker cock greasing sphincter puncher cock juggling thunder cunt Cock McDicks cock shitting fuck monkey cock sucking fucksnap cock swilling jizz devil cock wallet

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cockaturd fuckwit colon cowboy cooch dangler coochie snorcher coontacabra cooty licker cornholing fuckmonkey couchenozzle twat Count Fartula crack-snacking lobbyist crank-faced harlot schlocker crap cradling suckpocket crap wanker crimson labia lapper crotch frother crotch rocket crumb bearded fingersniffer crunchy cuntpuddles crusty butt booger crusty twatcanoe cum bucket cum burpin jism jockey cum depot cum drunk donkey cum gargling assmuncher cum guzzling cockpanda cum splattered circus tent cunt knuckle cunt licking monkeyknocker cunt licking snatch bagger cunt monkey cunt plumping cockwhistler cunt puffin cunt sprocket Cuntan the Fuckbarian cuntard cuntbucket cuntcrackers Cuntface McDoucherson cuntflap flounce weasel cunting wankflap cuntish dickweed cuntleberry douchebag cuntsicle cuntwasp cuntweb Cunty McCunterson Cunty McFuckstick Cunty McMuntersville

cuntyfucking testicle-flapper curdled cum gargler daffy cunt dancing queef to queef dangling pussy fuckbucket David Hasselhoff day shift stripper diaper sniffer dick boil dick breath Dick Cheney dick infested man mattress Dick Lick McCrick dick purse dick sniffer dick tickling cumdumpster dick wrinkle dick zit dickwizard dildo slime dingle chomping dwarf dingleberry licker dirty sanchez whore DJ Shitty McDick Shits dog faced spawn of a boil-ridden anus dog fisting cunt-faced codswollop donkey fingerbanger donkey raping jizzbag Doodie McFartsickles douche canoe douche gerbil douche nozzle douche rocket douche-apotomus, Douchy McAsshat Dr. Doo-jizzle drooling thunder cunt drunk frontbutt duck diddling fuck badger effervescent shitstain enema gargler everlasting knob stopper extruded cumbubble fag humper faggot humping dick bishop fart barking schnausercunt fart felcher

FINNISH Ufoporno = space alien pornography Voi, Vitunlihakeitto = Oh, Cuntsoup Suksi vittuun = Go ski into a cunt Vittujen kevt ja kyrpien takatalvi = used like oh fuck but literally means spring of cunts in the mid-winter of cocks. DUTCH In Dutch, lethal diseases (the more oldfashioned, the better) and genitalia are combined to form swearwords. kankerhoer = cancer whore vuile teringlul = dirty TB dick gore tyfustrut = filthy typhus twat teringlijer = TB sufferer, used for men only kankerlijer = cancer sufferer, used for men only kutwijf = cunt bitch klerewijf = cholera bitch krijg de tering = get TB krijg de klere = get cholera etc. muts (literally woolen hat) = stupid bitch doos (literally box) = stupid bitch LATIN misella landica = poor little clitoris mentula-whomper= someone who whomps a tiny penis

SPANISH el hijo de la grande puta = son of a fat whore chupe la mantequilla de mi culo = Suck the butter from my ass chupacabra tacaa = stingy goatsucker vieja apestosa = stinky old woman vete frie las papas = go fry potatoes putadora = bitch or whore GERMAN munster fratzen = phonetic spelling of the German words for giant cunt fick dich in dem knee, du schweine prieste.= fuck you in the knee, you pig priest schlabberfotze = slobbery watery cunt zuckerstange = penis, literally candy cane or sugar stick einhandsegeln = slang for masturbate, literally - sailing with one (deck)hand or sailing alone du bist ein scheisskopf und eine schlampe = you are a shithead and a bitch kuhfotze = cow cunt SWISS-GERMAN Schaafseckel = sheep penis SWEDISH Satans kuk = Satans cock

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flaming smeg sauce flapcheese free range soylent green french silk slit frosted twat frozen mixed vegetable cocks fuck pie fucking Christ crackers fudge dragon fur burger furry tuna taco garbanzo guzzler gerkin jerker German chocolate wanker Gordon Ramsey grilled dick cheese ham wallet head cheese connoisseur infidel falafel jerk noodle jizz drizzled twat waffle kale sucking shit surfer key lime cock kumquat squeezer love mayonnaise madame waffle rocket mayonnaise factory meat waffle moose taco muffin pecker mustard stained underdrawers nut wrangler peanut laden ass spackle pickle flicker pumpkin fucking ass hamster rectal cabbage farmer Reeses Fuck roast beef cunt nugget salty vault sausage wallet semen imbibing toaster streudel shallot-whacker shit dribbling pickle weasel skanky avacado slut cake son of a cupcake fucker sperm waffle

spicy cockmeat sandwich split knish steaming twatwaffle strawberry rhubarb pustule taco toking twit texas fudge pecan piss toast fucker tofu puppy tuna town twat falafel twinkie dicked bean penis velveeta vagina waffle sucker wanktoast whisker biscuit whore muffin yeasty keistered fuck nugget

IHOP International House of Profanity Authenticity of non-English expletives cannot be guaranteed. Use at your own risk.
POLISH Cipacupa = cunt CZECH Piichachu = twat ITALIAN Vafanculo = go roughly fuck yourself in the ass Testa di cazzo = literally, head of a dick SCOTTISH bawbag = ballbag RUSSIAN Perhot podzalupnaya = Pee-hole dandruff

fart-in-the-box fecking arsewipes feculent-whore felch festering bajingo pilot festering cunt boil festering hemorrhoid on the asscrack of humanity festering muck shoveler fetid surly cunt poots fickshit fiery faggot fiend fist hole flaccid phallus from Baghdad flaming fuckweasel flappy funhole flappy lipped cocksock flatbacker flatulent fuck farmer floppy wanded dementor buggerer flying squirrel vagina foreskin bonanza foreskin shredding chink chopper Freddy Mercury replacement fuck me drunk fuck muppet fuck nuggleberries fuck trophy fuck-a-doodle-doo Fuckballs McFizzle-Tits fuckbucket fuckerdoodle fuckering fuck fuckhead fuckernuttery fucking shit-tastic fuckronaut fucksicle fucktarp FUPA grinder gangrenous twatswabber garbage sniffer gargle pussy George Bush Georgia OQueef gerbil catcher glitter tits goat raper

goatse licking ass painter goddamn fucking soul-less ginger gooch licker gooch muncher goodwill polly pocket pussy gooey shitfingers goose fuckers gooseturd granny fister great big shining ball of excrement great Caesers cocksucking ghost great cock block of China gristle tits grizzly grundle-monger grot fondler gusset nuzzler gyrating goatfucker haggletoothed jizz sipping hippy hairball-horking hussy hairy areola hamster cornholer hamster handjob hamster snatch hemorrhagic fist fissure hemorrhoid hickey herpes eating monkey fucker hickory smoked horse buttholes hipster shit flipster hissypricked mothermuncher Hitlers ass hair hobbitwat hog wanker holy flippin fluckin fluckety muck honkey stick hookerface tranny horking arse-wanker horse humping thunder cunt horseapples howling cunt-crawler inconsiderate prick fuck asshat maggot infected ninja nutsack ingrown pube peddler insurance salesman jack fapping hole-muncher jack hole jagoff jealous cupcake snorter

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Jesus creeping shit Jesus suffering fuck Jiminy Fuckwit jimminy jizznuts jizz dixie whistler jizz jester jizz sniffing ass gasser jizzsaw pustule Julie Andrews junkslut kangaroo snorting assswipe kitten raping donkey whore kittentits kiwi cockballs knicker-wearing tosser knobslobber ladyhole shover lard-lubricator leaky scrotal lesion licker leaky twatted craftard lifeless phallus licker liver coloured pansy sucker lopsided silicon fun bag tramp maggot ridden cum trap magniturd mangina Mel Gibson merkin muncher Merry Go Fuck Yourself meth mongering tittylicker micro cock minge monkey mini-pricked ass pustule mister/sister assfister blister moist undulating envagenator moldy panty-stain mongolian clusterfuck monkey fisting shit slapper monkey spanking gash lapper moose cock mother pus bucket motherhumping shitfucks mouth breathing cunt stopper Mr. Barbra Streisand mud pussy muff buffer mugglefucking trollshit

mung muncher mung rag needle dick bug fucker Nickleback fan nipple wanker Non-Newtonian fuckwad noxious fume spewing gasbag nub licking spankdaddy one-handed wand wizard oozing arse-pucker Osmegma Bum Loader Palin anus pecker farm pecker pincher pendulous scrotumed shit weasel penguin shiting ass-spelunker penis holster penis muncher penis pilot penis pox penis puffer penis wrinkle penny-slotted whore pestilential meat curtain phallus loving sons of a queer phlegm sucking twat crepe piddle pus stinking pooter prick pig fucker pigmy whore piss infested cum bubble placenta crafting glitter licker plague infested pusscunt poo badger pork sword pariah pox-crotched cumgargler poxy cock prolapsed ass-faced cunt nugget pube picker pucker licking cooter slut pus guzzling anal herp pussy pouch pustule sucking rodent fucker pustulent chode fluffer putrid placenta picker putrified burning arsehole nugget queef sniffing twat-toad queef whiffer

PREHISTORIC CURSES Things Fred Flinstone mutters under his breath when he has to pick up Dinos shit from the backyard
Herpesarus Clitosaurus Cuntasaurus Rex Smegmasaurus Triceratwats Twatadactyl Twatasaurus Vulvasaur Psittacosaurus

THIS EVENING WE ARE OFFERING A LOCALLY SOURCED, FREE RANGE SOYLENT GREEN, PREPARED SOUS VIDE IN A TEPID SMEG WATER AND PRESENTED WITH A MEDLEY OF SEASONAL CUNT WAFFLES. Swear words that incorporate food or food-like substances
angel food cocksucker anus gravy bacon pocket bagel tickling smockjockey baked brain flan bastard lips McStreusel cunt beef curtains beef gargler beefy tits biscuits and bone gravy bitch cookie bitch tart bitch waffles burger queef butter cunt

cabbage headed thundercunt

cabbage headed thundercunt candy ass celery knob cheese covered ham wallet cheese lipped fuckface cheese minged swampdonkey cheese vaged jizzjar Cheesefuck McFarthop cheesey twat face cheesy gobbler chewy muffin nutter chicken McTumors churro turbo caliente cinnamon flavored cocks cock cheese nacho cock flavoured fuckleberry cock juggling sausage wallet cock POCK-ets cock strudel cock waffle corn flecked cock corn fucking squirtface corn shit smoothie corn studded turd dildo creamy butthole with fudge sprinkles on top crusty ass, cheese smelling fucktard cum spangled ass cheese cunt cake cunt cheese sandwich cunt falafel cunt punching pumpkin fucker cunt warping kale monger deepfried buttflower dick burger dick giblets dick pickle dingleberry pie crust eater dogfart pie dogshit taco double barreled shit sandwich douche chalupa douche kabob douche waffle duck butter on toast falafel quiffer fig pluckers son fishdicks

9 flaming smeg sauce

chockacockra clumber flock conch cornforkin cobscraper crazybatch crotch pimple crusty hog gobbler cuniculous curmungdung feltcherant dangling participle dastardly dick knobbler disco box dog felcher donkey puncher dookie ball dragon boogies duck fart echo headed idiot expecto patronads eyepotatoes fairy farts fartus interruptus fermentard festering ragamuffin festerknob flange monkey fluck frack frog sucker fudge monkey funderthucking bun of a sitch fungible giminy fartbuckets gleet gulping galoot grundle breath guntwizard gusset sniffing fartknocker hobo-a-gogo hung Parliament icehole ink sniffer jackwagon jerk folds jiggery pokery jungberg knuckle bucket licktard lint licker

monkey balls mother ducking sass-noodle mother farter mother monkey mouth organ Mrs. Puggy Wuggy nappy dugout narthex nasal deviant nozzletart nugget guzzling knobgardener nut hook panty face piddlefart pig ignorant chicken plucker Piggly Wiggly pocket gobbler pucker ducker putain Raskin Bobbdins sascrotch singlet slartibartfast sloblock slot faced son of a tea cozy smucking fart smudge snotdribbling knobgobbler snozzgobbling turd miasma soggy crumpet son of a window dresser starpunk hippy twister swish and flicker tea totaling mustache lover thruck tiddlysminker toe sucking pig priest twarthyfoam Wankie Doodle Dandy warty wand weasel fletcher whining cat fart whip crack wool fondler yarn barney

queeficorn Queen LaQueefa quivering crevice rabid rectal reamer rage boning thunder cow rancid penile discharge gulper rancid pile of assholes rancid rats rectum rat rapist rectal inspector rectum glob regurgitated cum bubble reTARD revilest teabaggin boobie snatcher Rick Santorum ring around the anus Robert Mugabes throbbing gristle rooster nuts rousing flap hoser rubber fuck muppet rug munching son-of-a-cunt rum soaked menage a twat Rush Limbaugh rusty trombone rider sack donkey saggy ass saliva soaked beaver snatcher santorum sucker Sarah Palin saucer nippled McDoogen-fister scabateur scabbytaint schlong jacket screaming shit weasels scrote lick scrotum biter scrotum tits scummy cunt goat felcher Seacrestion secretion-soaked Snooki thong Seth Rogens scrotum shark bugger sheep shagging lollygaggers shirtcocking smegberry shit dicked cuntpickler shit eating assgoblin shit flinging wank monkey shit gargling fucktard

shit flinging wank monkey shit gargling fucktard shit huffing dick muncher shit lipped fuckstain shit ridden nun fucker shit screwing cumdonut shit sniffing strudel munching motherfucker shit stained butt monkey shit trumpet shit whistling cunt snot shitiot Shitler shiverin slutbluff shovel handed ape sideways assmutant Sir Wank-a-lot sister fister skank dipper skank humping mattress jockey skanktard skull fucking shiteater slackjawed candyassed cumdumpster slagging baboons bloody butthole slam whore slap happy stinkers slatternly nun sucker slimy oozing hatchet-wound slimy snot of a shit weasel slippery jizz-fizz sloppy cunt slut curtain slut guzzling cock monkey slut monkey slut muncher slut slinging pole-pumper smegma breath smurf shitting dick wrangler snaggle snatch sniveling cockbandit snot dripping moose vulva snot fucked splooge barf snot spewing assblaster snot sucking horse knuckler son of a felching monkey son of a footfucker son of a limp-dicked armadillo son of a monkey diddler

son of a sodomizing goat herder spacktard spandex humping crotch jockey spanking cockwanker sparkle fangbanger sparkles bajingo Sparkletits McFuckface spectral twat flap sperm gurgler spermatorium sphincter scab spooge dripping gutter-slut spunk dripping gammon flaps square cut punt squirrel dicked wonder stank ass patchouli hippy stank spank steaming cunt drop steampunk mustache octopussy steampunk tampon rivet sticky spunk spittoon sticky-fingered cock-hockey coach stump bumper
stupidfuckingcuntybollocksexpialidocious

sucking scat gobbler swampass licking thunder cunt sweet hairy buttfucking Moses swollen dick eye syphilitic cock munching whore syphilitic turbo-slut taint spanker taintastical gonad guzzler tantalizing testicals Teddy Fuckspin testicle junkie thundercunt tickledick skinbag tit slapping piss-cupper tit twister titty grabbing ass walrus tough cunt blisters tub girl turd rocket turdalicious turdulating bitch-hole twat bucket twat rocket Twatty McFuckbucket

twatty wattled chin wanker twatzarella twuntwich upcycling cuntmuffin vag acne vag faced junk spelunkers vagina slap vaglitic douche twiddler Veronica Bigballs vulvacidal assworm vulvapaloser vulvic pole vaulter wangbasket wanking smeg-snorter Warty McDouchenozzle weaseldinked scabnapper wheres the queef whore crafted glittering anal beads whore fungus wizened twunt Wizzer Shitcunt McFartpoop wombat juice wraparound titty twister yabos yak hunt sniffing poon hound Your Vagisty, Queef of England

JESUS POPEYE, DO YOU EAT OLIVE OYLS PUSSY WITH THAT MOUTH? Maritime obscenities
barnacle licking octopus rapist bilge smoothie bilge spooging knob swabber blubbering blowholes bunghole pirate Captain Gayhab and Mobys dick cephalopod pud chum sucker clamwow cocktopus cod faced bastard cod prodding puffin fluffer conch spunk congealed bucket of whale spooge crusty lipped oyster ditch

cuntlefish Davy Jones hairy locker dolphin fondling bream-reamer dolphin sucking cunt cheese eel feeler festered ass-barnacle fish flaps flounder pounder grouper groper halibuttfucker hoist ye quivering mast knob gobbling lobster twat Kraken muncher lime licking kraken whacker limp shrimp dick manatee manhandler mollusk molester mucus coated mealymouth mullusk musty maggotted cunt crab necrotic cephalopod cock oozing sac of octopus offal orca porker plankton yanker pollock bollocks poopdeck wrecker porpoise raping pederast poxcocked squid fucker puking boil-brained minnow red snapper cunt lapper salmon sucking nautilus nutsack scrod scrotum scurvy pervert sea bass up the ass sea slug slurping jellyfish fellator seagull scrotum sea-urchin merkin shad shagger slimey tongued bum-swabber sponge-pumping seasquirt spume sucking briny hiney squid-diddling whale-impaler thar she blows . . . my giant pirate cock Tightpants McGinty, Captain of the Douchecanoe walrus comber whelk wanker ye scurvy semen licking seaman

LETS KEEP IT CLASSY UP IN HERE Swear like Shakespeare

bacon-fed knaves banbury cheese bawdy fen-sucked scut craven swag-bellied varlot dankish rump-fed harpy droning clay-brained giglet frothy rude-growing pignut gorbellied fustilarian infectious elf-skinned clotpole mewling fool-born strumpet puny sheep-biting haggard reeky milk-livered maggot-pie saucy pox-marked mammet surly shard-borne flap-dragon warped doghearted coxcomb villainous beef-twitted apple-john whore-son caterpillars

FAMILY FUN NIGHT Things that probably only sound dirty

(Seriously though, Im not Googling anything else, not after blue waffle.)
addadictomy angina ankle sniffer astrowaffle baltog beaverhousen blathering frent blithering bug butter blouse wearing poodle walker bootscooter borflesnarts bronzed plonker bumfuzzle bunuvasitch butterwort butzy cankle slapper cheese and rice