The Qu’ran says, “Women are your fields. Go then into your fields as you please.

” 1 The only prohibitions in Islam are vaginal intercourse during menstruation and anal intercourse. Oral sex should not lead to any naajis (impure) substance being swallowed otherwise “anything goes” as long as it’s done within the confines of one’s home. And on top of this you are allowed to have four wives! As far as homosexuality goes Muhammad stated, “If you find anyone doing as Lot's people did, kill the one who does it, and the one to whom it is done.”[5] The story of Lot from the Hebrew Bible is also to be found in the Qur'an.

1. Qu’ran (2:223)

SURA VII: 78-84 78. Then the earthquake took them, and in the morning they lay prone in their dwellings; 79. And he turned away from them and said, 'O my people! I did preach to you the message of my Lord, and I gave you good advice; but ye love not sincere advisers.' 80. And Lot, when he said to his people, 'Do ye approach an abomination which no one in all the world ever anticipated you in? 81. Verily, ye approach men with lust rather than women- nay, ye are a people who exceed.' 82. But his people's answer only was to say, 'Turn them out of your village, verily, they are a people who pretend to purity.' 83. But we saved him and his people, except his wife, who was of those who lingered; 84. And we rained down upon them a rain;- see then how was the end of the sinners! So homosexuality originated in Sodom? In other words it sprung from evil. Before this no one was born gay. But there are references to homosexuality in earlier parts of the Old Testament. Sodom is where the word sodomy comes from. But what went down in Gomorrah? What did they do there that got their city destroyed that was so far out that there is no word gomorrahy nor definition of it? SURA XXIX: 28-35 28. And (remember) Lot when he said to his people, 'Verily, ye approach an abomination which no one in all the world ever anticipated you in! 29. What! do ye approach men? (or Do you commit sexual acts with men?) and stop folks on the highway? And approach in your assembly sin?' but the answer of his people was only to say, 'Bring us God's torment, if thou art of those who speak the truth!' 30. Said he, 'My Lord! help me against a people who do evil!'

31. And when our messengers came to Abraham with the glad tidings, they said, 'We are about to destroy the people of this city. Verily, the people thereof are wrong-doers.' 32. Said he, 'Verily, in it is Lot; they said, 'We know best who is therein; we shall of a surety save him and his people, except his wife, who is of those who linger.' 33. And when our messengers came to Lot, he was vexed for them, and his arm was straitened for them; and they said, 'Fear not, neither grieve; we are about to save thee and thy people, except thy wife, who is of those who linger. 34. Verily, we are about to send down upon the people of this city a horror from heaven, for that they have sinned; 35. and we have left there from a manifest sign unto a people who have sense.' Again we are told about the invention of homosexuality. Allah’s messengers then tell Lot before the actual event went down that he will be saved but his wife will not because she will linger. What was preventing Lot of telling his wife “Move your fat ass and don’t look back bitch!” so she too would be saved. But here is the thing about Islam. Everything that is bad on earth is good in heaven. So if you are subservient to Allah you get to do all the evil forbidden things you didn’t do on earth. On earth you couldn’t drink alcohol but in heaven there is Veuve Cliqout running out of the facets. On the earth you could only have four wives in Muslim heaven you can have many more and no matter how many times you have intercourse with them they will remain virgins. That means they will never get pregnant because Muslim heaven is devoid of children - really a realm of death. And here’s the good news for gay Muslims, You can even commit sodomy in Muslim heaven. 12. " And Allah will reward them for their patience, with a garden and clothes of silk (in Heaven)." 13. " Reclining therein upon raised thrones, they will see (find) there neither the severe (heat of) the sun nor the hitter cold (of the moon)." 14. " And the shades of the (Garden) will come low over them, and the bunches (of fruit), there, will hang low in humility (being easy to pick)." 15. " And amongst them will be passed vessels of silver and goblets of crystal."

16. " (Bright as) crystal, made of silver; they will determine the appropriate measure. 17. " And they will be given to drink, there, a cup (of alcohol) mixed with Zanjabeel (ginger)." 18. " (From) a spring, there, named Salsabeel." 19. " And round about them will (serve) youths of perpetual (freshness): if you saw them, you would think them scattered pearls." 20. " And when you look, you will see a Bliss and a Realm Magnificent." 21. " Upon them will be Green Garments of fine silk and heavy brocade, and they will be adorned with Bracelets of silver and their Lord will give to them to drink of a Drink Pure and Holy." 22. " Verily this is a reward for you, and your endeavor is accepted and appreciated. What this boils down to is that a bunch of prancing flaming faggots in full drag will bring out the bottle homo in you and stick grapes and other things in your mouth. If you did one of these “scattered pearls” up the kazoo ten times his anus would still be fresh and tight.