This action might not be possible to undo. Are you sure you want to continue?
ACT I Scene 1 Richard Long lies in his bed asleep. An intro and Music plays for 40 seconds. He wakes up, and the music starts to fade out. He looks at his alarm clock, and not hearing anymore music, and goes back to sleep. As soon his head touches the pillow, the music starts playing again. He sits up abruptly, and looks around, the music fades out. At this point, concerned, he starts looking to figure out where the music is coming from. He shrugs and walks into the other room. Scene 2 Bill is eating his breakfeast. Richard paces around the room. BILL: You alright? You look horrible! Have a seat RICHARD: I couldn’t sleep last night. There was so much- noise. BILL: Noise? What noise? RICHARD: The neighbors, they were blasting that- you know that music. BILL: From Mrs Smith, are 90 year old neighbor? RICHARD: Yeah I thought it was a rather odd too. BILL: What do you mean? RICHARD: Nevermind. Bill Resumes Eating, looks to the newspaper. BILL: Have you seen this weeks crossword. It’s so hard. The porno music, just a base blip, plays. Richard looks around confused.
CONTINUED: RICHARD: Why do you even bother, it’s a friday. BILL: My motto has always been the harder, the better.
The music starts again a different blip this time. Richard stands up. RICHARD: do you hear that? That sound? BILL: I don’t know what your talking about. RICHARD: Listen man, I’m tired of messing with me. I don’t know what you did or how you did itBill Starts to open up a bannana RICHARD but it’s gotta stop. Or Else I’m gonnaPorno music starts as Bill unpeels the bannana dramatically in slow motion. Richard stares on shocked. The music abruptly stops when Bill takes a bite of his banana. BILL: Richard. Richard are you okay? Richard! SCENE Scene 4 Bill and Richard enter the Doctor’s Office. Bill’s arm is around Richard. Richard is apprehensive. DOCTOR Please, come in... Richard hears Music Blip. All three sit down BILL I have dragged my roommate here today because I am concerned about his... health. (to richard) Go ahead Richard. The doctor’s here to help you. RICHARD Well, for the past few days, I have been hearing music. Not all the time, but (beat) on occasion.
DOCTOR What do you mean? RICHARD Well it,... it sounds like, 70’s porno music. Richard does an impression of the music he hears. DOCTOR Ah Hah! I have heard of this once before. I believe you might have a very rare disorder, named Pornogitis, that causes you to hallucinate and hear this music you hear. If we are to continue, you must calm down. Have a ’Blow Pop’. Music Blip. RICHARD No thanks. DOCTOR In that case, don’t mind if I do! Doctor unwraps, and starts sensually licking and sucking the lollipop. Music starts again. RICHARD I can’t take this any more! Richard runs out of the doctors office. Billy chases after. Music continues as lights fade. Doctor continues to eat pop. SCENE Scene 5 Richard walks out the door of the doctors office looking dejected. There is a jogger out there. The porno music starts again, Richard looks around desperately. RICHARD: ah come on. The jogger stops and looks at Richard. RICHARD: I’m sorry. I have this- thing. It’s hard to explain. I don’t think you would understand- or care. The jogger is now moving somewhat to the beat of the music.
RICHARD: Everywhere I’ve been for the last few days, I’ve heard this- song from a porn movie- not the whole soundtrackbut just one, song, repeating over and over. I’m losing my mind. I don’t think it’s ever going to stop. The Richard, now in his own world, looks to the ground. The jogger walks over to Richard and puts his arm on his shoulder. JOGGER: It’s okay. I hear it to. RICHARD: What? JOGGER: We have a group that meets at the local church on thursday nights. You should come by. The Jogger gets ready, then starts jogging down the street. Richard looks on. SCENE Scene 6 There is a group of 5 men sitting in a circle talking amongst themselves, the jogger being one of them. They look up and see Richard enter and they are silent. Richard sits down. One of them stands up in the group. GUY My name is Johnathan, and I have pornogitus They all clap enthusiastically. The man sits down. Richard nods and gets up and looks around. RICHARD My name is Richard and I have pornogitus as well. But you can call me dick. The music starts blasting in the room, and they all start cringing in frustration. SCENE