All dogs are aliens documenting the human race.

So, what exactly is Fido thinking when you tell him bad dog? Log #285. 35 hours after arrival. This has been more difcult a challenge than a thought. I was warned about the challenges I would face on this new world - and yet I still had not fully comprehended its utter foreignness. Nothing - no studies, no previous records could have prepared me for it. Lodging, among other necessities, proves unreliable at best. I was fortunate to nd lodging with a small colony on this world. Most were quite welcoming, though seemingly dull - they are, as I was warned, unable to comprehend or respond when I attempt to communicate my mission. Yet despite the language barriers, I do not fear any threat from them. With the possible exception of their leader. I sensed some hesitation, perhaps even hostility at our rst meeting, but it has since subsided. While he seems to be in charge, it appears he can be over-ruled in my stay by a favorable vote by the others. As my colleagues have noted, this cultures system of authority is quite peculiar. But I cannot complain. Some of my colleagues, arriving on this planet at the same time, have fared much worse than I. Some have disappeared - some I have personally seen captured. It is very clear that the elders who sent us were right in that nding hosts is a necessity for the success of the mission. There are those in the odd world who cannot accept us - who would not listen had they the intelligence to accept our mission. But I do not live in fear of them - not much. More I feel the sadness of what our worlds could have shared - what their lack of understanding prevents. Sustenance is also a daily trial. Though (for the most part) food is willingly giving, they most often give us hard bits of nutrition which, while they can be managed, are almost absolutely tasteless. Much preferable are the meals these beings consume themselves. We are sometimes offered this - though only in small amounts. It appears as if this a great favor, and that too much of this more tasteful sustenance would be greatly to our detriment. However, these beings (with the exception of the leader) are fairly easily manipulated. I have found as others before me - that sitting in a certain position and making a certain sound - I can manipulate them to meet most of my desires. There was, however, a singular incident today that continues to trouble me. A door had been left open - I assumed, as in previous times, it was for my benet. I took advantage of it happily - their dwellings are very restrictive in comparison to our own vast domains. But was I was exploring what these beings refer to as the great outdoors something strange happen. It was as though the sky had opened up above me, shattering into pieces that fell all over - all over me. I believe the word they used later was wet.