Yesterday I was sitting down and Scene had crossed my mind,. We talk everyday yo u know.

And wouldn't you know it, the phone rang. I glanced at the phone and saw the number and sure enough it was HER. Do I pick it up and not say anything lik e she did to me before, do I say hello, buenos dias or do I say ,"Dr Helpchick: s Hot line , "How may I help a chick?"Needless to say I chose the latter . Dr He lpchick is my funny way of being able to say 'Im not a real Doctor but I play on e in real life ( you remember the commercial , right?) It also give me a chance to give Selena treatment. tee hee hee Well that started it . Selena was just le aving church when she called . After I introduced my self as Dr Helpchick and I was trying to help a chick, Selena says , " cant you just say hello"? . My resp onse was in my most professional sounding voice was, "Pardon me ma am, (she hate s being called that) but this is the Helpchick Hot line, we are here to help a c hick , Do you require the assistance of Dr Helpchick?" Selena tries to hold on t o the religion she just got in church , I know she wants to say something smart but she cant because shes just leaving church. tee hee hee. Selena says " my Go d I just left Church and you already got me bout to fuss you out'! I reply, 'Wel l turn yourself right back around and go back in the church and gitcha somore . Thats right gitcha. 'Apparently the first lesson didn't take if you walk out th e church and try to fuss me out." Im jus sayin ".""Well Tod,' she says, if you w ould just say hello when I call I could hold onto some of my religion"'We don't do that Selena " "We never just say hello ' 'We start out by discussing who's ph one is more trickier,which is yours by the way" "Now I repeat, this is the Helpc hick Hot line and it seems as though we DO have a chick in distress". Im jus sayin Laughter ensues Honestly,that's how our conversations start out. I think we love to get on eac h others nerves and cant stand each other when we are nice. That's what we do b est We make our "dysfunctinality" functional by keeping the funk in dysfunction .Dysfunction is the new normal. Just like 40 is the new 30. If someone asks wha t is normal, the best response is dysfunction. A long as you keep the funk in it everything is fine. ( according to Dr. Helpchick) It works for Selena and I. It keeps laughter in the air .It also keeps me inspired to write about it. I remem ber back in 09 I said I wanted to write. I had tons of stuff that I never publ ished. For some reason I didn't think it was good enough. I cant remember wher e I saw it , but I recalled what it said...."write about what know". After sever al attempts to produce something that proved worthwhile I finally hit the nail o n the head when I decided to write about my relationship with Selena. That's so mething I know so why not write about it? In a perfect world , I can see Scene and I talking on the phone on the big screen, bickering and fussing back and for th and I can almost hear the audience laughing. I have said in the past I would watch this if it were on TV. It has all the dysfunction that viewers like to lau gh at, it contains lovable characters that have depth and emotion that are able to make you laugh and cry at the same time What really makes it work is the che mistry that the two main characters have. The impeccable timing , the sharp wit and sarcasm combined with my handsome good looks(as defined by the Urban Dict ionary) would make it a hit . Im jus sayin .All of these things fall into place between the two characters mostly because they've known each other for more tha n half their lives and have spent the last ten years of the friendship over the phone. Oh lets not forget the fact that I'm tod tv and I view a lot of life thr ough the guise of a television sitcom. Starring me of course Im jus sayin But I realize that its not a one man least not yet, and that I need t o have a co star. She needs to be a slick chick with a smart mouth who is able to keep the funk in dysfunction.She needs to have humor wit and and sarcasm . If she's fake bi lingual , that's a plus, along with being a plus size . Hmmm,I wonder who can help me to create THAT scene.

The phone rings. I think I know who it is. "Welcome to the scene Selena , Ive been expecting you.

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