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Wanting to be Safe, Secure, to Survive Wanting Approval Wanting Control
APATHY GRIEF FEAR LUST
Bored Can’t win Careless Cold Cut-off Dead Defeated Depressed Demoralized Desolate Despair Discouraged Disillusioned Doomed Drained Failure Forgetful Futile Giving up Hardened Hopeless Humorless I can’t I don’t care I don’t count Inattentive Indecisive Indifferent Invisible It’s too late Lazy Let it wait Listless Loser Lost Negative Numb Overwhelmed Powerless Resigned Shock Spaced out Stoned Stuck Too tired Unfeeling Unfocused Useless Vague Wasted What’s the use Why try? Worthless
Abandoned Abused Accused Anguished Ashamed Betrayed Blue Cheated Despair Disappointed Distraught Embarrassed Forgotten Guilty Heart-broken Heartache Heartsick Helpless Hurt If only Ignored Inadequate Inconsolable It’s not fair Left out Longing Loss Melancholy Misunderstood Mourning Neglected Nobody cares Nobody loves me Nostalgia Passed over Pity Poor me Regret Rejected Remorse Sadness Sorrow Tearful Tormented Torn Tortured Unhappy Unloved Unwanted Vulnerable Why me? Wounded
Anxious Apprehensive Cautious Clammy Cowardice Defensive Distrust Doubt Dread Embarrassed Evasive Foreboding Frantic Hesitant Horriﬁed Hysterical Inhibited Insecure Irrational Nausea Nervous Panic Paralyzed Paranoid Scared Secretive Shaky Shy Skeptical Stage fright Superstitious Suspicious Terse Terriﬁed Threatened Timid Trapped Uncertain Uneasy Vulnerable Want to escape Wary Worry
Abandon Anticipation Callous Can’t wait Compulsive Craving Demanding Devious Driven Envy Exploitative Fixated Frenzy Frustrated Gluttonous Greedy Hoarding Hunger I want Impatient Lascivious Lecherous Manipulative Miserly Must have it Never enough Never satisﬁed Oblivious Obsessed Over-indulgent Possessive Predatory Pushy Reckless Ruthless Scheming Selﬁsh Voracious Wanton
Abundance Course Workbook
to Survive Wanting Approval Wanting Control ANGER PRIDE COURAGEOUSNESS ACCEPTANCE PEACE Abrasive Aggressive Annoyed Argumentative Belligerent Boiling Brooding Caustic Deﬁant Demanding Destructive Disgust Explosive Fierce Frustrated Fuming Furious Harsh Hatred Hostility Impatience Indignant Irate Jealous Livid Mad Mean Merciless Murderous Outraged Petulant Pushy Rebellious Resentment Resistant Revolted Rude Savage Simmering Sizzling Smoldering Spiteful Steely Stern Stewing Stubborn Sullen Vengeful Vicious Violent Volcanic Wicked Willful Above reproach Aloof Arrogant Bigoted Boastful Bored Clever Closed Complacent Conceited Contemptuous Cool Critical Disdain Dogmatic False humility False virtue Gloating Haughty Holier than thou Hypocritical Icy Isolated Judgmental Know-it-all Narrow-minded Never wrong Opinionated Overbearing Patronizing Pious Prejudiced Presumptuous Righteous Rigid Self absorbed Self satisﬁed Selﬁsh Smug Snobbish Special Spoiled Stoic Stubborn Stuck-up Superior Uncompromising Unfeeling Unforgiving Unyielding Vain Adventurous Alert Alive Assured Aware Centered Certain Cheerful Clarity Compassion Competent Conﬁdent Creative Daring Decisive Dynamic Eager Enthusiastic Exhilaration Exploration Flexible Focused Giving Happy Honorable Humor I can Independent Initiative Integrity Invincible Loving Lucid Motivated Non-resistant Open Optimistic Perspective Positive Purposeful Receptive Resilient Resourceful Responsive Secure Self-sufﬁcient Sharp Spontaneous Strong Supportive Tireless Vigorous Visionary Willing Zest Abundance Appreciative Balance Beautiful Belonging Childlike Compassion Considerate Delight Elated Embracing Empathy Enriched Everything’s okay Friendly Fullness Gentle Glowing Gracious Harmonious Harmony Intuitive In tune Joyful Loving Magnanimous Mellow Naturalness Nothing to change Open Playful Radiant Receptive Secure Soft Tender Understanding Warm Well-being Wonder Ageless Awareness Being Boundless Calm Centered Complete Eternal Free Fulﬁlled Glowing Light Oneness Perfection Pure Quiet Serenity Space Still Timeless Tranquility Unlimited Whole 11 Abundance Course Workbook . Secure.EMOTIONS IMPERTURBABILITY Wanting to be Safe.
I don’t know how. Let it wait. What’s the use. It’s too hard. No way out. Feeling Cut off Dead Defeated Dejected Depressed Despairing Discouraged Disillusioned Downcast Drained Exhausted Fatigued Futile Helpless Hopeless Low Negative Numb Overwhelmed Pessimistic Powerlessness Resigned Tired Weak Thinking I can’t. It’s not use. I don’t count. It’ll never work. I’m doomed I’m useless. Why bother. I don’t matter. Acting Careless Catatonic Disassociated Defeated Forgetful Giving up Inattentive Indecisive Indifferent Lazy Listless Negative Passive Spaced Out Stuck Unfocused Unresponsive Withdrawn 12 Abundance Course Workbook . forget about it. It’s too late. No way. I’m worthless.APATHY Results in: Desire is dead because it’s no use. I don’t care. No use. why try. I can’t win. No matter what I do. We can’t do anything and no one else can help. We withdraw and play weak so we won’t get hurt. Tomorrow. It’s a dead end. I give up. it doesn’t make a difference.
I’ll never get it right. It’s not fair. Woe is me. It’s not my fault. I can’t do anything about it. I’m the victim. If only. I’m less than. I’ll never recover. Why me? Nobody loves me. Feeling Abandoned Abused Accused Ashamed Betrayed Blue Cheated Despair Disappointed Distraught Forgotten Guilty Heartbroken Heartache Heartsick Helpless Hurt If only Ignored Inadequate Inconsolable It’s not fair Left out Longing Loss Melancholy Misunderstood Mourning Neglected Nobody cares Nobody loves me Nostalgia Passed over Pity Poor me Rejected Remorse Sadness Sorrow Tearful Tormented Torn Tortured Unhappy Unloved Unwanted Vulnerable Why me? Wounded Thinking Do it for me. They’re taking advantage of me. Hysterical Martyr Melancholy Moping Morose Needy Neglecting self and others Nostalgia: “the good old days” Pouting Seeking comfort Self-conscious Sobbing Suffering Wailing Weeping 13 Abundance Course Workbook . It’s all my fault. I can’t do it right. I can’t do it myself. Acting Acting helpless Attention seeking Complaining Crying Dramatizing Flustered Helping others at your own expense. Nobody wants me. Poor me. They’re doing it to me.GRIEF Results in: The desire for someone to help us because we can’t do anything but we think maybe someone else can—we cry out for that someone to do it.
I have to get it right or they’ll kill me. I’m trapped. so I can’t do anything. I have to get them before they get me. I’m confused and don’t know what to do. Disaster’s looming and I’ve got to hide. What if I fail? What if I get ﬁred? What if I get into trouble? What if I make a mistake? What if they don’t like me? What if…? What will they think? Acting Agitated Ambivalent Apologetic Chaotic Confused Cowering Cringing Defensive Disorderly Distraught Distrustful Disturbed Embarrassed Evasive Frenzied Frozen Hesitant Hyperactive Hyper-focused Hyper-vigilant Hysterical Indecisive Inhibited Irrational Lack of clarity Meek Mistrustful Nervous No action Not trusting Overwhelmed Panicky Paralyzed Paranoid Procrastination Quaking Scared Secretive Self-sabotage Shady Sheepish Shock Shy Superstitious Suspicious Timid Traumatized Tremble Tunnel vision Wishy-washy 14 Abundance Course Workbook . I’m not enough. I can’t let them ﬁnd me out. They’re out to get me.FEAR Results in: The desire to strike out but not doing so because we think they will hit us harder. It’s so confusing that I just can’t move. Feeling Anxious Apprehensive Caged Cautious Cowardly Distrusting Disturbed Doubt Dread Engulfed Exposed Faint Fidgety Frantic Insecure Nervous Panic Skeptical Sheepish Strained Tense Terriﬁed Threatened Timorous Trapped Uncertain Unsafe Vulnerable Wary Thinking Crisis after crisis. It is safer to stay still and not take any chances. I’m not OK. I don’t want anything to change. It’s not safe. there is no way out. The desire to reach out but not doing it because we think we’ll get hurt. I’m not safe. It’s closing in around me.
LUST Results in: The desire for possession–Wanting. I’m not satisﬁed. I want to know. The hunger for money– things–people. I need… I want excitement. I must do it my way. We may or may not reach out. Look at me. me. There isn’t enough. Feeling Ambitious Anticipation Appetite Craving Demanding Desire Envious Excited Frustrated Gluttonous Greedy Heedless Horny Hot Hunger Insatiable Jealous Less than Longing Ravenous Reckless Sensuous Sexy Voracious Wanting Wanton Thinking I want… Do it my way. My way is the only way. I need them. Acting Addictive Attention seeking Chaotic Compulsive Covert Desperate Devious Devouring Driven Excessive Exploitive Extravagant Fixated Frantic Frenzied Hoarding Impatient Inconsiderate Indecent Lascivious Lavish Lecherous Lewd Licentious Manic Manipulative Miserly Obsessive Out-of-control Over indulgent Over-eating Panting Predatory Pushy Risqué Ruthless Seductive Self-centered Selﬁsh Uncooperative Unruly Vulgar Wild With abandon 15 Abundance Course Workbook . Me. I want to understand. I need you. but with hesitation. I have to… I like it this way. should not have. Don’t stop. There won’t be enough for me. me. How can I get it? I can’t wait. I want to ﬁgure it out. I must have it. There is an underlying sense that we cannot. It feels so good. I’m starving. I want it all. I want it now! I want more.
Get out of my way. I’ll let them go down the tube. If they don’t listen to me. Not a chance. or else! Acting Abrasive Abrupt Abusive Aggressive Attacking Barbarous Belligerent Biting Blinded Bloodthirsty Brooding Brusque Brutal Callous Caustic Cold Crazed Cruel Curt Deﬁant Demanding Deranged Destructive Discourteous Disrespectful Exacting Ferocious Fierce Gruff Harsh Headstrong Heartless Instigating Intimidating Inﬂexible Invasive Malevolent Maniacal Merciless Nasty Obstinate Offensive Passive-aggressive Petulant Pigheaded Profane Provoking Punishing Pushy Ravaging Rebellious Resistant Rude Ruthless Sarcastic Savage Spiteful Strife Stubborn Talking about others Uncooperative Unyielding Vengeful Vicious 16 Abundance Course Workbook .ANGER Results in: The desire to strike out. I’m not doing anything. Don’t tell me what to do! Drop dead! F… off! F… you! Fat chance. Me do it your way–not on your life. We might or might not strike out. Don’t push me around. to hurt and stop the other one. Who do they think they are? You better do it my way. Now you’ll pay. I’ll get even! I’ll get them. Feeling Agitated Annoyed Boiling Disgusted Disturbed Explosive Fierce Frustrated Hateful Irritated Jealous Livid Mad Malicious Outraged Perturbed Rageful Resentful Sizzling Smoldering Steely Stern Stewing Sullen Upset Vengeful Violent Volcanic Wicked Willful Thinking Do it my way or else. but with hesitation. Out of my way. I’ll kill you! I’ll never give in. Not on your life. Don’t even think of it.
I’m the only one who can get it done. I’m in a better place than all of you. the wish to stop others from movement as they might pass us up. I’ll look like I’m agreeing and do it my way. You need me to get it done. I know everything. My way is the only way. I’m the savior/hero. Maybe I’ll do it and maybe I won’t. I know. Feeling Above it all Aloof Arrogant Better than Complacent Conceited Condescending Contemptuous Cool Disdain Haughty Holier than thou Icy Irreverent Judgmental Pious Rejecting Righteous Rigid Smug Special Superior Uncompromising Unfeeling Vain Thinking I’ll just reject! How dare you! I knew that. I’m the only one who can do it right. I’m smarter than everyone else. Unwilling to change or move–therefore. Acting Aloof Arrogant Bigoted Blaming others Boastful Bored Closed Complacent Conceited Detached Disrespectful Distant Dogmatic Egotistical False Humility Gloating Hypocritical Indifferent Know it all Narrow minded Never wrong Opinionated Patronizing Pompous Putting others down Remote Sabotage Sanctimonious Self-absorbed Self-centered Self-important Snobbish Spoiled Stoic Stubborn Stuck-up Talking against others Unforgiving Impenetrable Unreadable Unyielding Withdrawn Walk away 17 Abundance Course Workbook . I’m better than you. What do they know? What’s wrong with you? Who do they think they are? Who do you think you are? Why is everyone so incompetent? You don’t belong. I’m right. I’m too busy with important matters to have time for you. I’m not like them. It’s your fault. I’m better than all of them.PRIDE Results in: The wish to maintain the status quo. I won’t associate with “those kind” of people.
I know we can. I’m willing.COURAGEOUSNESS Results in: The willingness to move out without fear or hesitation–to do–to correct–to change wherever needed. I can respond appropriately. It’s possible. We’ll ﬁnd a way. The willingness to let go–to move on. It can be easy and effortless. It is as easy as it was hard. I’ll do what it takes to make it work. We can do it. I do what’s needed and it works. Feeling Alert Alive Assured Aware Centered Cheerful Clear Conﬁdent Cooperative Delighted Eager Energetic Exhilarated Focused Grounded Gusto Happy Heartiness Hopeful Independent Invincible Loving Lucid Non-resistant Open Optimistic Passionate Purposeful Receptive Resilient Safe Secure Stable Willing Zealous Zest Thinking I can I can get it done. I’m willing to take risks. Let’s work together. Yes! Acting Able Aboveboard Adaptive Adventurous Bold Brave Candid Collaboration Commitment Compassionate Competent Cooperation Creative Daring Decisive Dedicated Dynamic Enjoyment Exploration Flexible Focused Forthright Gallant Generosity Giving Goodness Gratiﬁcation Honesty Humorous Initiative Inquiry Insightful Integrity Inventive Motivated Partnering Perceptive Persevering Persistent Playful Pleasure Resourceful Risk-taking Robust Self-sufﬁcient Sharp Solution focused Spontaneous Strong Supportive Tireless Unpretentious Valiant Vigorous 18 Abundance Course Workbook . I can listen.
I have what I need as I need it. I have and enjoy everything as it is. We all have a contribution to make.ACCEPTANCE Results in: No need to change anything. It is beautiful as it is. It’s all coming together. Everything is unfolding as it should. Acting Abundant Accepting Appreciative Balance Benevolent Caring Clear-sighted Co-creative Compassionate Devotional Embracing Empathy Friendly Gentleness Gracious Insightful Intuitive Magnanimous Naturalness Non-judgmental Orderly Receptive Satisﬁed Tenderness Understanding Warm Wonder 19 Abundance Course Workbook . Everything is OK. Feeling Accepting Allowing Attuned Beautiful Childlike Compassionate Contented Delighted Elated Enriched Flowing Fulﬁllment Glowing Happy Harmonious Innocent Joyful Loving Mellow Open Playful Radiant Receptive Satisﬁed Secure Soft Well-being Thinking All is well. No judgements of good or bad. Everything is beautiful. I accept you. I love you just as you are. It just is and it’s OK.
It’s just perfect. total unto my Self. We are one.PEACE Results in: I am–I am whole. complete. I am. Feeling Awareness Boundless Calm Centered Complete Eternal Free Fulﬁlled Glowing Light Pure Quiet Serene Oneness United Thinking All is well. Everyone and everything is part of my Self. Everything is unfolding as it should. Acting Actionless Balanced Centered Composed Connection Flawless Imperturbable In equilibrium Inﬁnite Limitless Perfection Poised Quiet Self-possessed Serenity Spacious Stillness Tranquil Unlimited Whole Witnessing 20 Abundance Course Workbook . It is all perfect.
Grief The desire for someone to help us because we can’t do anything. Everyone and everything is part of my Self.SCALE OF ACTION Peace I am—I am whole. It is all perfect. Pride The wish to maintain the status quo. Fear The desire to strike out but not doing it because we think they will hit us harder. Acceptance No need to change anything. Courageousness The willingness to move out without fear or hesitation—to do—to correct—to change wherever needed. 21 Abundance Course Workbook . We can’t do anything and no one else can help. Apathy Desire is dead because it’s no use. total unto my Self. the wish to stop others from movement as they might pass us up. but with hesitation. The willingness to let go—to move on. should not have. We withdraw and play weak so we won’t get hurt. but with hesitation. complete. The desire to reach out but not doing it because we think we’ll get hurt. Lust The desire for possession—Wanting. but we think maybe someone else can—we cry for that someone to do it. It is beautiful as it is. We may or may not reach out. I have and enjoy everything as it is. We might or might not strike out. The hunger for money—things— people. It just is and it’s OK. There is an underlying sense that we cannot. Unwilling to change or move— therefore. Anger The desire to strike out to hurt and stop the other one. No judgments of good or bad.