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MARIA MERCY N.

CERO MAED-EDAD – 1 ____________

16 OCTOBER 2010 TEST PERMIT #:

COMMUNICATE @ MY BEST Our life is a cycle of relationship. From the moment we possess life in this complex world we already invested a relationship. That relationship started from our parents with our siblings at home. Then extended to the people in the community our friends, classmates, associates and significant others. This relationship can be nourished through a constant communication that somehow very crucial it is because of the many barriers in the communication processes that we encounter everyday of our lives. From the barriers of communication springs misunderstanding that will eventually result to conflicts. Conflicts when not handle well will almost certainly results to the destruction of relationship because of hatred, pride, ego, self-importance and self-interest. One of the barriers of communication is self-image. When we speak of self-image we must also consider looking back the individual experiences especially of the way they were brought up in the basic ground the family to where each of us came from. In the family a child may experience insecurities that would be a factor in one’s self-image. When a child will grow in the family where there is an absence of affirmation from the parents and the siblings he/she would probably develop a very low self-esteem. And when he grows old and would start to involve in the larger community with a low self-esteem cause by insecurities could be a hindrance for him to shine, communicate with the many different individual and to poster a healthy relationship among others in general. I believe that the many filters of communication are most of the times unavoidable basically because of our individual differences. No matter how we would like others to understand the way we want to be understood and to understand other feelings as well, we can really encounter misunderstanding with the many factors to mention. But the point that I would like to raise is that “how we can restore the healthy relationship back in the midst of disagreements, conflicts and oppositions?” As they say it is easier to start the conflicts but it takes efforts to mitigate it once started. I would like to emphasize the difference between conflict resolution and conflict transformation as means in solving an existing conflicts. Conflict resolution would mean solving the problem but may focus solely on the problem at hand. Regardless whether the opposing parties are in good terms or not after the resolution made. In most cases, persons in opposition may resolve the problem but there is already a gap in the relationship. Somehow it is like a mirror that once broken it will not be mended again perhaps it may be mended through the use of an adhesive but the scar is there. The scar would mean the gap in the relationship, though the problem is resolve but the persons in conflict may not restore the relationship they had before the conflict. In resolving the disagreements it would be better I think to engage not just conflict resolution but conflict transformation. Transformation would not be concern on resolving the problem alone but in restoring back the relationship because relationship is more significant than the solution to the

CONFIDENTIALITY and COLLABORATION. 2) our body language should portrayed that we are really attentively listening and listening to the body language of the sender as well. 3) repeating back the message by using own words to make certain what the other person is trying to say. needs. If we know that the person are just saying malicious thing eventually our trust to the person will be lost. Once this trust is lost disaster is feasible. When we collaborate we will respect the other’s interests. There are things being shared to us that need to be treated with confidentiality this is also a test of trust in a relationship. CREDIBILITY. Second. CONSISTENCY would mean as to what degree a person is living up to the others expectations. When there are no pretentions and making beliefs. 5) as much as possible never to add or delete important details of the message to avoid distortions. This is to eradicate the gap in the relationship that may arise after the conflicts. I will present here five very important things for us to consider in having a very effective communicative skills. namely. Fourth. COLLABORATION would mean the ability which one’s attempts to satisfy personal concerns and the other’s concerns. Therefore we need to be tactful and to consider who will be affected in what we are saying especially when it involves personal matters. First of all is LISTENING. CREDIBILITY would mean as to what degree a person is believable. 4) never to give an interpretation of the message being sent to you. We need to consider that we should mean what we say. First. To the point that the person is consistent to the words he/she utters. 1) devoting one’s attention and interest to the one who is delivering the message. I just need to be myself. that is why this skill should be the first thing we need to improve for an effective communication. and 7) it would be a wiser idea never to relay the message to others when it is not so clear to you to avoid the delegation of a wrong information. and goals to come up with a common goal that is agreeable for us and the other parties. In communication as a two-way process would also mean meeting half-way for the benefit of common good. CONSISTENCY. Lastly.problem. To improve our listening skills would include the following tips to take into account. Third. it wouldn’t be hard for us to make other people believe in what we are saying. We must consider that relationship is what matters most than anything else. Trust is the key component where we can predict that a person would really mean what he has to say. in this complex world with varied different people I still have a strong conviction that I can still communicate at my best if am honest to myself and others. As I think of it. Lastly. though conflicts cannot be avoided in communication we can still communicate at our best in order to lessen the possibility of conflicts. I will give more emphasize on listening skills because listening encompasses the interpretation or translation of the message given by the sender. In this way. It is a tool that will lead to understanding that avoids misinterpretation of the message that would pave the way to misunderstanding. CONFIDENTIALITY would mean as to what degree a person can be trusted with confidential matters. . We must be credible enough in all the things we are going to say so that people will trust us. and then follows the four C’s I think could really be used as our guidelines in communication processes.