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The Development Of Self-Discipline In Children

The Young Child is constantly withheld from many of their desires by physical limitations. We use baby entrance, fences, locks on doors and cabinets (restricted places ), cribs, playpens, leashes, and brief commands ("NO!" "indeed !"). We carefully watch the actual young child; monitoring what he or she sees, where he will go, and with whom he affiliates. These barriers are primarily for the purpose of protecting the child through himself - from his own desire to seek his own will prior to an age whenever he has knowledge, self-discipline, a fear of the Lord, or help from the actual Holy Spirit to avoid that which is harmful to him or her. The School-Age Child continues to be in bondage under the elements of the world. Gal. 4:3 Foolishness is bound down the middle of a child. Prov. 22 :15a Having foolishness in his heart, he is likely to act the part of a fool - a fool hath no delight in understanding, but that their heart may discover itself. Prov. 18:2 he constantly desires to venture into the actual "department store" of the flesh. There is nothing more dangerous than permitting a child to "discover himself " at this age. The heart is deceitful above all points, and desperately wicked: who are able to know it? Jer. 17 :9 Being at the beginning of their "formal training" in self-discipline, he is relatively helpless at controlling his own desires; and also the fleshly nature is regarded as a fascinating friend rather than observed to contain no good thing. Rom. 7:18 As a parent, you must safeguard him from his own worst enemy his skin, and two other predatory enemies -- the world and the devil. Childhood is the time to train your son or daughter in preparation for a life of self-denial (Mt. 16:24). As a parent, you must become an outer boundary that restricts the actual fleshly nature of the child until the time that he has built inner boundaries and has inner help from the Lord. The outside barriers must remain well beyond the crib-stage; the barriers now becoming more directed at the speech and actions (which arise from the thoughts). Growing up gets older, curiosity about the external world and his body's desires increases, and the pull from the inner fleshly nature gets to be more demanding. There is each and every indication in the Bible that God expects total mental (2 Cor. 10:five ) and physical (1 Cor. 9:27a) self-discipline; the kind of discipline that leads one to present his body as a living sacrifice (Rom. 12:one ) and to take a determined are a symbol of Jesus Christ (as did Daniel, Jeremiah, Nehemiah, Moses, Paul, Christian martyrs (Heb. 11:32-38), etc.). The traditional school setting has some advantages, although in several Christian schools the disadvantages (peer influence, poor discipline, poor spiritual environment, and so on.) outweigh the advantages. The advantages are the ones that greatly help to build mental and physical selfdiscipline, and should be seriously considered by home school parents. Self-discipline in a college is learned through: 1. The necessity of planning ahead to deliver books, homework, long-term assignments, etc. To school complete and on time. 2. The delay of the physical gratification/needs associated with walking about, bathroom split, water, etc. 3. The delay of the physical gratification of eating (only at lunch).

4. The denial of the desire to speak so as to concentrate on work. 5. The actual denial of the desire to speak so as to help others work. 6. The delay of the desire to speak to cooperate during group work. 7. Assignments totally dictated by the instructor. 8. The denial associated with comfort to one's body (sitting up on hard chairs). 9. A clean work environment (versus. Clutter, toys available, and so on.). 10. A day scheduled into definite, fixed time slot machines with limited time between classes. The Teenage Years Rules - the to the outside barriers to speech and behavior, should, by the teenage years, have become a schoolmaster to bring [your child] on to Christ (Gal. 3:24 ); not only in the sense associated with Salvation secured, but coming to Jesus Christ for help with self-discipline. Correction from their parents has, by this time, taught him that he is a sinner in need of Jesus Christ in order to save him from eternal passing away in Hell. Prov. Twenty three :13,14 Later within the teenage years, he has realized that outward control (nevertheless some barriers and discipline, but much more guidance) coupled with his own emerging self-discipline nevertheless fails to keep his skin under control. He must eventually recognize that by himself he cannot "hang on" and do correct especially in regard in order to emotions and sexual desires. He is coming to the knowledge of for I know that within me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good i find not. Romans seven :18 Trust in his parents to assist "keep" him controlled within speech, thoughts, and actions must now be directed toward one who is able to help from within their heart. If, having accomplished this during the teenage many years, he can now say i will do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Phil. 4:13 For thou hast been a shelter for me, and a strong tower from the enemy. Psalms 61:3 The LORD is my strength and my protect ; my heart trusted within him, and I am helped : therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my tune will I praise him. Psalms 28:7 As he as soon as trusted in his parents, an adolescent should now place his trust in the Lord. Fear thou not; for I am along with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy lord : I will strengthen thee; yes, I will help thee; yes,I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10 Training in Self-Discipline Your child "trusts in [his parents] with all [his] heart; and [must not] lean not unto [his] own understanding." Prov. 3:5 As a parent, you are his guide, their protector (from the world, their flesh, and the devil), and his external barrier to that that he desires to do that might develop poor habits as well as, consequently, poor character. Unlearned and not foreseeing the future, a child generally lives for these days as a slave to their flesh. Parents must constantly be alert for opportunities to direct the mind toward an organized, Biblically-based, inner control of thoughts, speech, and actions. Outward Discipline to Establish Inner Thoughts 1. Protect your child from a knowledge of sin. I maybe have you wise unto that which is good, and simple concerning evil. Romans 16:19 2. Protect your child from excessive thoughts about or even interest in the things of this globe. And truly, if they had been mindful of that country through whence they came out, they might have had

opportunity to have returned. Hebrews 11:15 Keep thy heart with all persistance ; for out of it are the problems of life. Prov. Four :23 "Keeping" a kid's heart is the parents' responsibility ! 3. Reconstruct verbalized thoughts when they reflect wishes of the flesh. For because he thinketh in his heart, so is he. Prov. 23 :7 4. Indoctrinate in the Scriptural basis and practical application of self-discipline. Deut. 6:6,7 Is. 30:twenty,21 5. Point out examples leading to success and failure - from the bible and from life. Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: plus they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come. 1 Cor. 10:11 1 nobleman 1:5,6 judges 14:3 Mental Self-Discipline 1. Expect mental effort - considering, reasoning; and memorization associated with verses, facts from topics, poems, songs, etc. Your child's education should always have a measure of difficulty. Fun in education has its place, but diligent work should be the main activity. Thou therefore endure hardness, as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. 2 Timothy 2:3 Good training, by necessity, will involve conflict with the fleshly nature of your child. 2. Train your child to be subservient to another's will, while at the same time instruction him to be cautious about selecting people to follow (strangers, and so on.). Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves. Heb. 13:17a Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour. 1 Peter 5:8 3. Train your child to have a pleasant mindset in all things. Work as faithfully on attitude as you perform on the training of physical discipline. Then this Daniel was preferred above the presidents and princes, simply because an excellent spirit was in him. Dan 6:3a And Jesus increased in knowledge and stature, and in favor with God and man. (He was 12 at that time.) Luke 2:52 Physical Self-Discipline 1. Erect firm, consistent barriers to unwanted actions. NEed desired actions when informed the first time! It is poor instruction to allow your child the "enjoyable sin" of delayed obedience (calling several times, counting to 10, etc.). Ep. 6:2 2. Impose discipline for repetitive infractions and encouragement for success (without inflating selfesteem). Ec. 8:11 3. Indoctrinate in the Biblical basis for bodily self-discipline and teach the actual practical application of physical self-discipline. 1 Cor.9:27 The Urgent Task The time is short, and the times are evil! Ep. Five :16 You have a brief opportunity (which is sharply reduced in the arrival of the teenage many years ) to instill the mental "operating system" that will guide your child for a lifetime. There is no time to "enjoy " the antics of a child with little self-discipline. If you laugh and think that junior's undisciplined habits are "cute," you and he will pay a dear price - a kid left to himself bringeth his mother to shame. Prov. 29:15 a young child is not an adult, nor may he be expected to have the self-discipline of an adult, but years as a child is the time to train the future adult. View all training because preparation for future support for the Lord. Train a young child to

become a useful servant of the Lord- strong in faith and in character! This is the parents' responsibility, and is not to be assigned to the church or a religious school. Homeschool parents possess a great advantage in character building, but many, due to weariness or even perceived inability, are ignoring character building while concentrating on child-centered academics. It is going to be difficult to place a hurdle around your child's fleshly nature. Each child will be different; many will put up more of a "battle " in defense of fleshly desires. Those who do tend to be, perhaps, being prepared for any more difficult life of service for the Lord. Do not fail these children in their preparation by using excuses (hyperactivity, physical handicap, middle child, etc.). A constant example must be set by the "trainers." While you might need to let down your guard as well as indulge in poor character, always remember that you must be able to say be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ. 1 Cor. Eleven :1 Training children in self-discipline takes much repetition training and consistency in correction and discipline. Train up a child in the way he should go : and when he is old, he'll not depart from it. Prov. 22:6 the actual rewards of careful attendance to character building are great ! The "yield" is the peaceable fruit of righteousness! Heb. 12:11 you'll be able to produce a delightful teenager! General Goals 1. To build a good inner restraint against the desires of the flesh - by providing consistent outer restraints and expecting habitual conformity. But I keep under my body system, and bring it into subjection. 1 Cor. 9:27a 2. To instill a fear of the actual Lord (which greatly reinforces inner restraint); and to train to obey as seeing him who is invisible. Heb. 11:27b Come, ye children, hearken unto me personally : I will teach you the fear of the LORD. Ps. 34:eleven The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge: but fools despise wisdom and instruction. Prov. 1:7 3. To encourage a total trust in the Lord for power and direction (recognizing that help with restraint is necessary). Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not really unto thine own understanding . Prov. 3:5 to LORD, I know that the way of man is not in themself : it is not in man which walketh to direct their steps. Jer. 10:23 Specific Goals Self-Discipline is needed: 1. To be accountable for the use of time. 1 Peter 4:2 2. To understand to wait to speak. James 1 :19 3. To speak when shyness or fear inhibits. One Thes. 2:4 4. To learn to weigh thoughts very carefully before speaking. Ps. 34 :13 Prov. 13:three ; 21:23 5. To be able to carry out unpleasant tasks without stress. 2 Tim. 2:3 6. To be able to use the mind in order to memorize required material. Prov. 10:14 Ps. 119:11 7. To be able to endure difficult trials. James 1:two,3 8. To learn to perform uncomfortable habits. 9. To have physical self-restraint. 1 Cor. NIne :27 10. To keep thyself real. 1 Tim. 2:22 Phil 4:8

11. To keep rule over his own nature (emotions). Prov. 25:28 12. To complete a project through inception to completion. Ec. 10:18 13. To deny the lust of the skin (unavailable/wrong material or bodily desires). Luke 9:23 14. To delay legitimate self-gratification; to be content with withheld desires. Phil. 4:11,12 15 to utilize no expectation of instant reward. Gal. 6:9 16. To joyfully submit to another rather than to seek one's own will. Ps. 40:8 17. To eat what is set prior to him with contentment. Phil. 4:11 18. To trust in the LORD with all thine heart ; and lean not on to thine own understanding. Prov. 3:5 19. To refuse feelings and choose to do what is right. 1 Kings 18 :21 20. To give up a liberty so as not to offend another person. One Cor.8:13 21. To build up mental discipline (Disciplined mind Disciplined body). 2 Cor. 10:5 22. To keep in work despite personal physical rebellion. Lam. 3 :27 23. To be a servant instead of a master. Mt. 23:11 24. To be accountable for one's individual name and family title (testimony). Prov. 22:1 26. To receive correction and discipline with a good attitude. Prov. Three :11; 15:10 27. To cooperate with the needs associated with others - to concede his needs for the benefit of a group. Ps. 133:1 28. To maintain a Godly value system that directs every day decisions. Gen. 24:thirty-three Col. 3:2 29. To submit to an unpleasant master. 1 Peter 2:18 30. To build up a mental alertness. One Peter 5:8 31. In order to refuse negative peer pressure. Ex. 23:2 Daily Plan Consistent Example Be ye followers associated with me, even as I also am of Christ. 1 Cor. 11:1 Consistent Teaching The proverbs of Solomon the son of David, full of Israel; To know wisdom and instruction; to perceive the words of understanding; to get the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgment, and equity; To give subtilty towards the simple, to the young man understanding and discretion. Prov. 1 :1-4 Consistent Training and Maintenance Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he's old, he will not depart from it. Prov. 22 :6 Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the coronary heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil. Ec. 8:11 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die. Prov. 23:13 Wherefore I will not be negligent to place you always in remembrance of those things, though ye know them, and be established in the present truth. Yea, I think it fulfill, as long as I am in this tabernacle, to stir you up by putting you in remembrance. 2 Peter 1 :12,13 Implementing Goals For every goal that you desire to be fulfilled in your child, make a particular, long-range plan to see your goal accomplished. Follow the design of: EXAMPLE --TEACHING--TRAINING. SAMPLE: Goal #1: self-discipline is needed to be accountable for using time.

Example: Be alert to time in your own life. Display a concern for your own use of time. Be on time to church, appointments, class, etc. Do not waste time! Ep. 5:16 Teaching: Expect household jobs to become done without stopping to play or to talk to others. Expect schoolwork to be done with out wasting time (playing with pencils, walking around, talking, daydreaming, and so on.) As your children get older (of sufficient age to easily tell the time as well as own a watch), expect them to be ready for church on time (without having to be told), get up on time (with the use of an alarm clock), plan ahead to be prepared for a specific bedtime, set the actual table prior to an hired time, be in from outside play at a certain time, and so on. Teach your child the value of your time - how to use it sensibly, how to plan ahead, and how to work to meet deadlines and schedules (long and short-range). Get him to memorize verses having to do with period, laziness, slothfulness, sluggishness, disloyality, etc. (Prov. 24:38-30-34; 18:9; 26:fourteen ) Training: Discipline in some manner when a responsibility to a particular time is avoided, overlooked, or forgotten. Let your child know that excuses such as "we forgot" will not be accepted! discipline for wasted time when he is expected to be working (set time aside from free/recess time, and so on.) Maintaining Boundaries 1. Physical discipline, when necessary. He which spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. Prov. 13 :24 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall generate it far from him. Prov. 22:15 2. Withdrawing a normal privilege-a withdrawn blessing due to a failure in the responsibility to do that which was taught. Whenever self-discipline fails, the old nature will be reinforced/encouragedbecause the pleasures of sin were permitted without any unpleasant consequences. If unpleasant consequences are not arranged by parents now, the actual unpleasant consequences will come once the child becomes an adult. (Ec. 8:11) 3. Natural consequences - those regrettable things that happen as a result of disobedience (perhaps disobedience that is not instantly discovered by a parent). RElated to God, we would also refer to this as "learning the hard way-by experience." Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good are employed in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ. Phil. 1:6 for this is God which worketh in you both to may and to do of his good pleasure. Phil. 2 :13 Jeremiah 29