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167.8 ◆ t h ur s day, m a rc h 1 8th, 2 0 1 2
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a campaign for everyone
Considering A Memory, a Monologue, a Rant, and a Prayer
One in three women are sexually assaulted in their lifetime. This may be a statistic you’ve heard before, but you probably haven’t spent too much time dwelling on it. On Mar. 3 and 4, people gathered at the Bullring to raise money and awareness while taking in two hours of emotional monologues performed by students on the subjects of sexual assault, physical harm, and hardships faced by women. This was presented as part of V-Day, the global movement encouraging “a global activist movement to stop violence against women and girls” that calls itself “a catalyst that promotes creative events to increase awareness, raise money, and revitalize the spirit of existing antiviolence organizations.” Proceeds from the night’s event went to Guelph-Wellington Women in Crisis, The Wellness Centre, and to a global V-Day fund to help women abroad. The “V” stands for Victory, Valentine, and Vagina. Even if you’re not an active feminist, it’s important to try
the issues Bottled water sales cuts for on the way CAnCEr out?
When unofficial results of last week’s election were posted, with it came the results of the three referendum questions. All three questions passed, including one proposing bottled water sales on campus end, which came in at 78.62 per cent in favour. However, if you’d read these results and thought that it meant you’d instantly no longer be able to purchase bottled water on campus, that isn’t the case. Bottled water sales on campus are controlled by the retailers themselves, whether it is the Bullring, Hospitality Services, or the Grad Lounge, to name a few. This question is simply part of a larger initiative made throughout the year by the CSA to move toward more sustainable practices on campus with regards to drinking water. That initiative is ongoing. “The next step is basically meeting with the administration and
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7 Arts & Culture 12 Sports & Health 19 Life 22 Opinion 25 Editorial 26 Crossword 28 Classified 28 Community Listings
The u of g’s v-day chapter offered two presentations of a memory, a monologue, a rant, and a Prayer at the Bullring on mar. 3 and 4. as part of their campaign to educate campus about violence against women.
and be aware of the state of the injustices individuals of certain genders face. The performances provided an excellent chance to connect with such issues emotionally through a medium that transmits empathy in an extraordinary way: theatre. Every participant bore their soul for all to see. For every tale told, the audience felt that there were millions just like it. The ratio of men to women at the event was rather uneven, as the audience was almost entirely female, with only a few men.
SEE MMRP PAGE 10
SEE Bottles PAGE 6
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up for the cut?
Cuts for Cancer holds fundraiser at Stone road Mall
On Mar. 2 to 5, Guelph had the chance to donate their hair to Cuts for Cancer, an organization that collects hair for wigs for cancer patients. Cuts for Cancer is a CSA club started three years ago by Lisa Kellenberger, a MA student at the University of Guelph. Cuts for Cancer received such an enthusiastic response that the club decided to relocate the event to Stone Road Mall, and partner with a salon called Karisma.
Putin reaffirms right to rule Hot off unprecedented protests against his rule, and his portrayal as a lonely old man in a German produced documentary, Russian leader Vladimir Putin shocked no one by winning Presidential elections this week. Monitors then shocked no one by pointing to irregularities in the conduct of the elections. Amidst a crackdown on protests against the results, Andrei Isayev, a senior official in Putin’s party, terrified everyone by referring to Russians as “a conqueror people.” Election controversies aside, even opponents appear to accept that Putin, facing communists, ultranationalists, and liberal parties tied to the urban population, or as Putin terms them “foes,” drew a majority of votes in the troubled country. (BBC) canadian government responds with the bare minimum to syrian massacres In response to the Syrian government’s bloody and rapidly growing crackdown on opponents, the Canadian government has extended its sanctions regime and closed its embassy in the country. Sanctions now ban all financial services and dealings with the Syrian central bank, and freeze the assets of seven members of the Assad government. While positive moves, many remain doubtful they will have much effect on the actions of the dictatorship, which has been allowed to act relatively free from substantive international pressure. Syrian-Canadian groups and their supporters continue to pressure the Canadian government to do more to help their ravaged homeland. (Globe and Mail) israel’s netanyahu repeats threats In Washington this week, Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu reiterated his willingness to attack Iran unilaterally if their government acquires nuclear technology, while American president Barack Obama cautioned against “loose talk of war.” The American president clarified that the United States was committed to ensuring that Iran does not acquire an actual nuclear weapon, but refused to go as far as Netanyahu in committing to an illegal war. Obama did voice support for the position that the Israeli government may act as it sees fit. While this gap in stances appears to preclude American involvement in a regional war, many worry that an expected Spring attack by Israel will force American involvement as Obama faces pressure preelection. (Toronto Star) Compiled by Cal Ceasar
“it really feels a lot better. it’s the difference between having real hair and barbie hair.”
– Lisa Kellenberger
“We just found that the space in the UC was too small for the amount of people we wanted to accommodate,” said Kellenberger. “Which was great really. It’s probably the best problem you can have.” When The Ontarion interviewed Kellenberger, Cuts for Cancer had collected 66 ponytails, which is more than previous years. The
cuts for cancer collected both hair and monetary donations at stone road mall to provide wigs for cancer patients.
majority of people who participate cut off eight to 10 inches of hair, which is the minimum requirement for a wig. It can take about nine to 15 ponytails to manufacture a single wig. The hair is donated to two organizations called Pantene Beautiful and Locks of Love, depending on whether or not the hair is treated. Pantene, a Canadian organization, distributes wigs through the Canadian Cancer Society and does not accept hair that has been treated or coloured. Cuts for Cancer also donates to the US organization Locks of Love to maximize that number of donations. “Our preference is to keep it in Canada, because then it gets donated to Canadian women and children who’ve lost their hair in treatment,” said Kellenberger. “But we want to make sure that as many people as possible participate.” Real wigs are considered superior to synthetic wigs for a number of reasons. After manufacture, real wigs are one length and can be cut and styled just like real hair according to the client’s preference. The other benefit of real hair wigs is the comfort level. Not only are they tailor fitted, but they behave more like real hair. “It really feels a lot better. It’s the difference between having real hair and Barbie hair,” said Kellenberger. There are lots of ways to participate in the event, such as sponsoring someone to shave their head, or by simply donating to the Cuts for Cancer website. This year Cuts for Cancer partnered up with an organization called Streaks for Cancer. People can buy coloured hair extension for $10-20 if they can’t quite bring themselves to shave. Both hair and monetary donations will be collected until the end of the month.
key tips to finding a job this summer
It is no secret that university is expensive, and finding a job for the summer or school year is essential. Luckily, there are many opportunities for students to get employed and possibly in an area similar to their degrees. Carrie Steele, a coordinator at CESC (Co-operative Education and Career Services) stresses two main themes for students seeking employment: find a job sooner rather than later and preferably look for jobs related to your degree or career interests. A tool emphasized by Steele to find such jobs is Recruit Guelph, which can be found at the Cooperative Education and Career Services desk or on the Univer- second important theme towards sity of Guelph website. Recruit student employment: career-reGuelph advertises over 250 sum- lated jobs. mer jobs for students and over “If you can get a career-relat220 part-time jobs, many related ed job that is the place you want to a student’s degree: more than to work,” said Steele. As well, a enough for those who take the student is better fit to explore time to look on the site. different career -elated jobs Steele’s advice on finding em- throughout different summers. ployment soon should not fall “Students should want to develop on deaf ears either. While pro- different skills and different exgrams like Recruit Guelph are in periences, it’s certainly beneficial full swing, deadlines for student having different employers on the employment with the Federal resume, it allows you to develop and Ontario government have different skills.” already come and gone. Students Steele recommends, which may also find opportunities to quells the commonly held belief earn higher wages but Steele em- that it is good to stay with one phasizes that should not be one’s employer over time. As for resumes, Steele emphamain goal. Even with prospects of higher profit, Steele stresses the sizes extra-curricular activities as well as career-related jobs to add to your resume. “Competition between other universities can be intense,” Steele explains. “It’s one extra step.” For more information on student jobs, go to the CESC section on the University of Guelph’s website or the Recruit Guelph job fair at the UC courtyard from 10a.m.-3p.m. on Mar. 27. So to get the career-oriented student job you want, get involved sooner rather than later. For more about summer job hunting, check out page 22.
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gain access to any food. It took only two weeks for the rats to learn how to get the food. Through this training process, the rats learned to associate certain thought patterns with the appropriate pitch and were able to control when and how often they were rewarded. In essence, the researchers managed to separate the role of the targeted motor neuron that triggers whisker twitching from the action. Carmena, associate professor of electrical engineering at UC Berkeley, cognitive science and neuroscience, believes that this study demonstrates the very real possibility that a patient could one day control a prosthetic without having to use any physical movement. “This is something that is not
scientifically inclined: harnessing brain waves to move objects
Scientists prove that it is possible to dissociate brain waves from the action with which they are normally associated.
Roald Dahl’s Matilda was a favorite book of mine as a child long before the movie was released in 1996. Like many children, I wished I could move objects using only my mind, just like the little girl in that book. Although that specific skill probably won’t be possible in our lifetime, scientists recently revealed that we are now one step closer to harnessing the mind’s power to move objects and, more importantly, we are now also one step close to significantly improving the lives of people affected by spinal chord injuries. In an article published in Nature, Dr. Jose M. Carmena and his team of researchers reveal that they have been able to isolate specific brain waves independently from the physical movement that they normally trigger. This innovative study opens up the possibility of prosthetics that could be completely controlled by the mind, allowing people who are completely paralyzed to use them. To demonstrate this, the researchers set up an experiment in which rats had to complete an abstract task in order to get a food reward. The catch? The rats could only complete the task if they didn’t use physical movement. The scientists outfitted each rat with a brain-machine interface (BMI). This machine converts brain waves into auditory tones. The only way to obtain the food reward was for the rats to modulate their thought patterns within a specific brain circuit. This modulation in turn raised the pitch of the signal, allowing them access to sugar water, or lowered the pitch of the signal, allowing them to access food pellets. If, however, the rats used the targeted group of neurons to twitch their whiskers (their usual function) then the BMI would fail to change the pitch of the auditory tone, and they would not
natural for the rats,” said Dr. Rui telekinesis any time soon, it is Costa, co-principal investigator possible that we might see those of the study. “This tells us that who have lost motor control reit’s possible to craft a prosthesis gain some agency and control in ways that do not have to mimic over their lives in the next few the anatomy of the natural motor years, which is just as extraorsystem in order to work.” dinary if you ask me. The researchers hope that this study will lead to the develop- Arielle blogs about science at ment of new and more innovative www.salamanderhours.com prosthetics. So, although we won’t be using The Force for
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safe week promotes education and awareness of sexual assault
education out into the community. The Wellness Centre encourages men The Wellness Centre is getting ready especially to show their support for for Sexual Assault Free Environment women by collecting signatures of (SAFE) week, a campaign that pro- male allies on their T-shirts. motes awareness and education “Some the challenges are that the on sexual assault. On Mar. 5, 4000 perpetrators of sexual assault are pinwheels were placed around the not going to come to an event about cannon to represent the number of sexual assault,” said Bowman. “So students on campus who may have it’s not to say that the individuals experienced sexual assault. SAFE here aren’t going to take the learnweek held awareness events on ing and education around kitchen campus and a T-shirt campaign tables and bar stools, but it’s that from Mar. 12 to 16. it’s generally not going to attract “We have lots of profs who are those individuals who really need going to be wearing T-shirts, and the information.” we have all kinds of students in the The Wellness Centre is based on a criminology course who are going peer help education model, where marianne Pointner to be wearing T-shirts,” said Mela- student are responsible for running nie Bowman, from Student Health workshops and providing informa- as part of safe week, the wellness centre placed 4000 pinwheels around the cannon to represent the Services. “We’re trying to make it tion. Currently, the Wellness Centre prevalence of sexual assault. a wide audience.” is holding a series of workshops that Awareness is a major part of SAFE focus specifically on consent and campus. The Wellness Centre col- we look at ways to promote edu- Housing, CJ Munford, and the Abweek because many people are un- healthy relationships. They are also laborates with many groups and cation and awareness around this original Resources Centre. aware of the frequency of sexual in the process of creating a work- organizations in the community to issue,” said Bowman. “So the WellSAFE week is usually held around assault. It is estimated that one in shop that brings awareness to the give survivors of sexual assault the ness centre is part of that bigger National Women’s Day as a way to four women will experience sex- fact that there can be abuse in same support they need. committee.” promote awareness. For students The committee includes the CSA who wish to participate in the Tual assault, and for men the ratio sex relationships. “It’s called ASAP and that’s Creating an SAFE space is some- Awareness of Sexual Assault and local affairs commissioner, the di- shirt campaign, T-shirts will be is one in ten. The T-shirt campaign thing that happens both on and off Prevention, and what we do is that rector of Campus Police, Campus available from the JT Powell building. promotes visibility and brings
shedding the stigma of mental health challenges
If you were to pass any given stranger on campus, you may (perhaps) not even pay them a second glance. You may not wonder who they are, or what they believe in, or how they came to be right there in front you. Yet, despite our unknowing, there is an entire world of people around us to whom we may not be as different as we let ourselves believe. This holds true for many things, but this Thursday, Mar. 8, the University of Guelph campus is coming together to share in its common experiences on mental health challenges; perhaps one of the most widely prevalent yet (SSN) at the University of Guelph, grossly misunderstood realities af- and one of the organizers of the fecting our society today. “1 in 5” event, has battled depresThe 1 in 5 committee came sion for years and emphasizes the together as a part of various or- importance of awareness and unganizations on campus trying derstanding both on a personal and to raise awareness and support social level. Stach mentioned that mental health. It aims to reduce she herself did not even realize she stigma and support those who may suffered from depression for many be experiencing a mental health years; she now struggles to help challenge. others achieve the same clarity. The name originates from a Ca“For me it’s really important to nadian Mental Health Association reach out to the younger gener(CHMA) statistic estimating that ations and be a peer support for one in five Canadians will suffer my generation,” said Stach. “The from a mental health challenge in biggest support that I have is the any given year. mental health community, and Shannon Stach, a volunteer I don’t know where I would be from the Student Support Network without it.” In many respects, mental health challenges may very much be the silent killer. Often having devastating effects on a person’s life, they are made all the more deadly by people’s reluctance to address the issue. “The first step is to create that safe space so people can start talking about their experience and not feel ashamed by it or feel that what they are going through is not real,” said Brittany Moor, SSN volunteer and organizer for the event. Thursday will feature a number of events all designed to educate on mental health and show how everyone can take steps to improve their quality of life. The events include a panel discussion, mental health training session, self-care events, and a resource fair. The panel discussion will take place from 5:30 to 7 p.m. in Rozanski Hall, room 103, and will include guest speaker Eric Windeler, the founder of the Jack Project at Kids Help Phone. Be sure to participate in the T-shirt campaign, students can receive a “One-in-Five” T-shirt to help support the cause with donation of $5. T-shirt sales will take place leading up to and including Thursday. Students who don’t manage to purchase a shirt can also wear green on the day of the event to show their support.
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hospitality services and getting a gauge of how best to phase out bottled water or if we need to make a compromise but certainly there are steps we need to take,” said Jessica Carter, the academic and university affairs commissioner. Although the CSA’s efforts have been going throughout the semester, the results to this referendum question will definitely strengthen their case moving forwards. “It’s huge. Students voted overwhelming in favour to discontinue the sale of bottled water on campus,” said Carter. “If anything, action has to be taken.” Despite the show of support from students, there won’t be anything definitive about the future of bottled water on campus right away. Part of the process involves meeting with and discussing the topic with representatives from vendors on campus, including Hospitality Services. “It’s definitely going to be an ongoing thing with negotiations and phasing and getting figures about bottled water and how much profit that brings into the university,” explained Demetria Jackson, the external affairs commissioner.
Guelph. But, as Reyes says, he was already here. Reyes describes his frustration with the little influence international students have on their fate as institutional cash-grabs, and describes the biggest issue foreign students face are vulnerability and fear. After recently experiencing a close call with the expiration of his student visa, Reyes was forced to extend his education until the administrative conflict was resolved. This nearly cost him more money, as his academic duration was stretched into the following year. Luckily Reyes confronted the matter, and dealt with the lengthy procedure of getting his money back, a process that he says would rarely be undertaken by the average international student. Students being overworked or unfairly treated are often too afraid of any repercussions that would jeopardize their scholarship or hard-fought and expensive education. Unlike the average Canadian youth that attends the University of Guelph, international students don’t have anywhere else to go but back to their home country, should anything go wrong. This is why, Reyes claims, international students are such easy targets for governments and institutions to charge double the rates on their tuition. International students make up a valuable fraction of Guelph’s student population, creating diversity through the enrichment of friendships and academic perspectives. Reyes echoes the popular opinion that Canada, as a developed and notoriously generous country, has both the responsibility and the resources to assist those who want to learn. Jackson is familiar with similar efforts, and brings up a referendum question from March 2010. “In 2010 we had the Bullring referendum to remove bottled water there, and that was huge and students voted overwhelmingly in favour of that,” said Jackson. “Ultimately it came down to [students] are our stakeholders, this is what they want so we need to make it happen. That was very successful.” With the success there will hopefully be motivation for further water bottle restrictions to take place, although part of the issue also involves providing alternatives. “Part of it is also making sure we have more access to water fountains, so that’s something that we’re also advocating for, and accessible water fountains so everyone has access to it,” continued Jackson. The referendum results only coming in this week, it is still early in the process, and it is something that will likely be ongoing throughout the next year. “We hope to get the wheels turning and leave a good solid transition for our next counterparts,” said Carter. “Before meeting, it’s difficult to put a time on it. But students voted in favour, so that’s the direction we’re going.”
The costs of being an international student
amy Van den Berg
It is expected for a student at the University of Guelph to say that they are experiencing financial hardships. It is not uncommon for students to make sacrifices regarding their undergraduate or graduate education. For international students, this is a significant understatement. These fellow Gryphons are minorities in the sense that they are far from their homes and families, and that they have had the unfortunate experience of having to deal with exorbitant international student tuition fees. While all Canadian students have had to cope with the effects of the increasing rate of tuition fees in the last decade, the amount paid by international students continues to be excessively high. The average undergraduate student in Ontario has to pay $6640 for the 2011/2012 year, almost a third of the $17,571 demanded of international students. Last year, Ontario recorded the largest increase in international undergraduate tuition fees, reaching a high of 6.1 per cent. The root cause of elevated fees is government underfunding. International students were not charged differential student rates until the 1970’s, when the federal government suggested that charging foreign students different rates was an easy way for Canadian institutions to generate additional revenue. These numbers are dramatically increased for graduate students such as Jaime Brenes Reyes. Originally from Nicaragua, and in the process of completing his MA on Latin American and Caribbean Studies, Reyes talks about the difficulties of being an international student at the University of Guelph. Reyes remarks that in addition to tuition, international students must cope with forever-rising additional compulsory fees. The University of Guelph website states that upon their arrival to the Guelph campus, international students are expected to provide a study permit as a condition of admission. Since international students are excluded by OHIP, in addition to medical and dental plans, these students are required to purchase the University Health Insurance Plan (UHIP) for themselves and any other accompanying family members. Failure to do so will result in a $500 penalty assessment. Reyes came to Canada on a full scholarship in 2004 and completed his undergraduate degree at Trent University. Now nearly finished his studies, he has had a lot of experience with elevated fees, a situation he feels is unfair. Reyes describes his first four years studying in Canada with enjoyment, saying how fortunate he was to have achieved a scholarship, as he would not be here without one. He remembers feeling astonished at the price of bananas, almost quadruple the price of the same fruit in his country of origin. This was when the realities of the costs of living began to sink in. He says that an international student barely considers the cost of living, since tuition is the primary focus of concern. Upon the completion of his undergraduate degree at Trent he was no longer helped by a scholarship and was left to face the international graduate-level costs of tuition along side the price of rent, food and additional fees charged by the University of
coyotes attacks increase in frequency
They migrated from western North America just over a hundred years Most of us eventually grow out ago. Since then they’ve been of our childhood fear of dangers thriving, and have expanded their living in the woods, but for some territory to just about all of North Guelph residents those fears have America. been re-awoken. A number of “Coyotes play an important role coyote attacks on pets in Guelph in controlling populations of rabhave been reported over the last bits, rats and mice, and they can few weeks. A report issued by the be a threat to other animals,” said Guelph Humane Society and the Deb Gray, operations manager for City of Guelph suggests to always the Guelph Humane Society. While normally nocturnal, they keep an eye on small children while are known to be active in the daythey’re outside, and keep dogs and cats inside during the night. time during their mating season, One of those attacks occurred on from around January to mid-March. Feb. 24, and resulted in the death “Coyotes are highly adaptive, of a beloved family dog. Watch- and they’re learning to live closing from the backyard window er to people so we are starting to of their home in the south end of see them more often,” said Gray, Guelph, the dog owner’s 11-year- who’s worked in animal care for 18 old daughter witnessed two coyotes years. “People can discourage coyattack and kill their pet. otes from entering their properties Coyotes haven’t been native to by removing yard waste and seSouthern Ontario for very long. curing compost and other garbage” Coyotes, or Canis latrans are closely related to wolves and dogs which, along with the dingoes and the jackals, make up all the living species of the genus Canis. Aside from killing or injuring pets, they are also are sexually attracted to some dog species. Male coyotes and female dogs can give birth to hybrids called Coydogs. The inverse- Dogotes is also possible but occurs less often. Gray says that the coyotes are learning to adapt to living in close proximity to humans, and like any wild animal will do what they have to do to survive. Outdoor cats are especially vulnerable to coyotes as they don’t tend to have a fear of dogs, which for them a coyote would resemble. Outdoor cats don’t have the same instincts as a feral cat and would be easier prey for a coyote.
arts & culture
improvising instruments and sounds
Contemporary Music Ensemble kicks off sixth annual U of g Creative Music Festival and Colloquium
A sit down for Mar. 6’s showcase of the University of Guelph’s Contemporary Music Ensemble at the Mackinnon building on the U of G campus had the chilling effect of pushing ones musical boundaries in ways not thought possible. The ensemble is a course offered through the University of Guelph and is open even to those wishing to take part aside from the credit, and audience members are also always welcome. The performance was part of the sixth annual creative music festival and symposium put on by the university, running Mar. 6 to 10, and offered the chance for individuals to immerse themselves in the art of contemporary music. The performance given the night of the festival’s kickoff consisted of collaborations between students enrolled in the course offered through the U of G, as well as their Laurier University counterparts in Improvisation Concert Ensemble (ICE). Both schools showed impressive ingenuity when it came to presenting their improvisational skills, pulling bizarre and captivating sounds from their instruments in highly creative ways. Each instrument added its own unique blend to the subtle harmony of sounds that was almost impossible to make heads or tails of. There also seemed to be an enduring sense of passion within the room that came with the whole ensemble. Every time you got an ear fixed on one of the instruments another would jump in and grab your attention, showing its own merits within the infusion. The evening seemed to bleed the essence of contemporary improvisational music. Trying new things, the repertoire played around with whatever was in front of them, illustrating that there are never really any mistakes in the repertoire. Improvising with sounds as well as instruments, the experimentation ranged from playing piano strings with toothbrushes to drumming on guitar cases. It seemed the repertoire had an endless supply of music to
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Joe sorbara, director of the university of guelph’s contemporary music ensemble (cme) gets creative on the drum kit during their open rehearsal last tuesday night with laurier university’s improvisation concert ensemble (ice).
feed their conviction that there is always room to add further creativity to an already diverse group of musicians. Any music geek should be strongly encouraged to attend one such evening of music, guaranteed to walk away with a fresh take on musical ensemble and creative license. The remainder of the colloquium’s events include lectures from key note speakers, round table discussions, performances, and studio tours. Most events are free to attend. All will be held throughout the Alexander, MacKinnon, University Centre, and Zavitz buildings on the U of G campus, except for a final joint presentation of an African repertoire and Newfoundland singer, fiddler, actor and accordionist Daniel Payne, at Harcourt United Church on Mar. 10.
ZZBra is “about nothing”
Moka Only weighs in on new collaborative project with Evil Ebeneezer and Stuey Kubrick
Many Canadian hip-hop listeners will recognize rapper and beatmaker Moka Only (born Daniel Denton) for his involvement in Vancouver-based hip-hop group Swollen Members. Appropriately so, as it was Swollen Members rapper Prevail that gave him his nickname. However, Only is a man of many projects. He has an extensive back catalogue of solo work, and has collaborated with the likes of Ishkan, Jeff Spec, Kirby Dominant, Def 3, Psy, Factor, and Nebz Supreme. He even served some brief time in Len. His newest project, a collaboration with fellow Vancouverites Evil Ebeneezer and Stuey Kubrick that runs under the moniker ZZBRA came to Guelph’s Knights of Columbus Hall on Mar. 3. Speaking with The Ontarion over the phone following the concert, Only offered some insight into how the project came together. “I’ve known Evil for years from and celebrity. the Vancouver hip-hop scene so “There’s been a lot of silly he’s somebody that I already had movies in the past that just do collab’d with in the past,” Only outlandish things, whether Tartold The Ontarion. “We have a zan or even Schwarzenegger mutual friend, which was his beat movies. We just wanted to showmaker, Stuey Kubrick, who actu- case some of that. Kind of poke ally pitched the idea of producing a little fun at that as well poke a the album for us.” little fun at ourselves,” said Only. Only said he and Ebeneezer “We don’t take ourselves super thought it “was a great idea” so seriously as individuals; we take they got to work on what be- the craft of the music seriously.” came Original Motion Picture While Only’s recent work has Soundtrack in 2007. been largely devoted to getting “That’s when we actually made ZZBRA off the ground, he says the album, and we’ve been real- that fans of his work with Swolly tinkering with it since,” Only len Members might not have to said. “We were waiting until all wait long before they can hear aspects – whether financial or him on another one of their revisual – were ready. It just hap- cordings. According to him, he pened to be now, at the beginning has contributed some beats and of 2012.” lyrics to an album the group is He says that despite the al- currently working on. bum’s being tied together with a “They’re my brothers and I’m “wild” and “jungle-istic” theme, sure we’ll always be messing with it’s ultimately about nothing. each other for as long as we do “That’s the glory of it,” said music.” Only. He feels the open-ended Only also has material on Swolnature of the album leaves it up len Members rapper Mad Child’s to listeners to develop their own latest EP, Little Monster. take on the material. For a complete interview with The group also wanted to poke Moka Only, visit theontarion. some fun at themselves, some- com. thing they ran with further in the production of their videos for “Elephant” and “Lets Roll,” which riff on exploitation film
moka only and evil ebeneezer ventured out to guelph’s knights of columbus hall mar. 3 in support of their new release as ZZBra, Official Motion Picture Soundtrack.
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ArtS & CULtUrE
featured at Zavitz gallery from feb. 27-mar. 2, duplex focused on aspects of the typical urban living situation.
Plants and Animals – The End of That 4/5
As one might expect from any band’s third album, Montreal indie outfit Plants and Animals’ latest offering, The End of That, courtesy is of a more mature sound than its predecessors. The third tune, “Song for Love,” Mature, but not necessarily is upbeat as well, beginning with all-grown-up: the songs are dom- an aesthetic similar to that of the inated by two conflicting themes one before it. Though at this point to which any student can surely it is understandable if one starts relate. First, there is a restlessness to worry whether or not they can about these songs, a yearning to still live up to the rock and roll be on the road (take a year off to precedent they constructed with travel, anyone?). Second, there their earlier albums. While these is a certain apprehension about are great songs, it would be an the future, a realization that what altogether bad thing if their raw we once thought was the distant edge were to fall by the wayside future is not so distant anymore as they grow as a band. But fear (marriage? kids? a real job?). Their not: halfway through the chorus, website likens 2008’s Parc Av- the cavalry arrives in the form of enue to childhood, and 2010’s wailing guitar chords and shoutLa La Land to adolescence. The ing vocals. End of That, then, represents the From here on out, the album twenties. captures the familiar Plants and Part of the appeal of Plants Animals sound of earlier works, and Animals’ early albums was but with a fresh take. Lead singer the freewheeling yet restrained Warren Spicer’s voice is throatirock and roll sound they exhib- er, harsher and, most importantly, ited, particularly in La La Land, more emotive than on either of the with the layered guitar riffs oc- previous albums. The vocals are no casionally invoking some good longer just providing a melody; old-fashioned Rolling Stones they provide a depth of meaning vibes. The End of That began beyond the lyrics themselves. with a completely different ap“No Idea” slows things down proach, starting off with “Before,” once more—the way the Eagles a soothing acoustic ballad, before might do—in resignation to the moving into the titular track. “The fact that the future will always End of That” is a likewise acousti- be uncertain. This tension breeds cally-dominated piece, but laced restlessness, and that manifests with fuzz-toned guitar licks, it is itself in “Runaways:” one last catchy, upbeat, and refreshing. chance to delay commitment and It’s like Tom Petty singing a Bob responsibility, one last youthful Dylan song. road trip.
hedley frontman Jacob hoggard serenades a crowd at guelph’s sleeman centre on mar. 1.
ArtS & CULtUrE
1 6 7 .8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
rock ‘n’ roll chameleon
deanna Jones guides audience through Keith richards’s life at onewoman show
An electric guitar, an amp, and a bottle of Jack Daniels make minimal set props for a performance about a man who has been related to students of rock as a guitar god, a junkie, and a pirate, and described as “mad, bad, and dangerous to know.” but they aren’t any less appropriate. Sitting in wait for Suitcase in Point Theatre Company’s The Keith Richards One Woman Show at the eBar on Mar. 3, this is what barflies and lovers of rock ‘n’ roll saw. The show tells the story of Mona (Deanna Jones), a Keith Richards fanatic who has amassed a collection of The Rolling Stones’ entire back catalogue, and additionally, a nearly total anthology of their concert bootlegs. She possesses every known remnant of Stones audio except for an elusive recording of a controversial 1979 benefit performance for the blind at the Oshawa Civic Auditorium, a show Richards was ordered to give as a condition of his parole after an arrest and trial following a Toronto drug bust. When Mona loses an eBay bidding courtesy war with another Richards fanatic over the same coveted artifact, she The Keith Richards One Woman Show sees deanna Jones serve collapses. This is just a glimpse into up impressions of rolling stones’ mick Jagger, Brian Jones, and of the world of devotion that Mona has course, richards himself. constructed in shrine for her worshipped rock god. Following some in Jones’s depiction of Jagger, whose jinxes against her competing devo- contributions to the band Richards tee, Mona shares her penchant for is unrelentingly critical of in his 2010 “Keith” – as she so familiarly relates memoir. Richards – and her fandom woes Running just less than an hour, with the crowd. The Keith Richards One Woman Mona’s obsession with Richards Show is far from a comprehensive cuts so deep, that in addition to tour through Richards’s life. Jones her record collection, she has read – who also wrote the play – offers the guitarist’s book six times. Re- selective picks from the musician’s lying on a Jack and shepherds pie past, present, and even future, going diet alone, she is on her eighth day as far as depicting Richards on the without sleep in an attempt to best set of a Pirates of the Caribbean – or at least match – her hero’s per- film that is recording some 4000th sonal record (nine days), when, as episode. the laws of dramatic comedy dicPerformed against a perpetutate, she crashes. al musical backdrop provided by What ensues is a kaleidoscopic the blues-rock stylings of guitardream voyage wherein Mona meets ist Kevin Richardson, the audience Richards (also Jones), and travels was treated to sound bytes from the through his years as a Rolling Stone. Stones themselves as well as those It is here that Jones proves her- that Richards has cited as having self a true rock ‘n’ roll chameleon, influenced his career (Muddy Wachanneling the cartoon weirdness ters, Chuck Berry), generating a of Richards’s career to offer stop- soundtrack that someone just like and-start on a dime impressions of Mona might consider essential Mick Jagger, Brian Jones, Anita Pal- Stones listening. A show that simultaneously porlenberg (the mother of Richards’s first three children), some of the trays the trials and tribulations of judges Richards has encountered fandom while also running through throughout his career, and of course, the personal history of a fairly public Richards himself, to name a few. The figure and his band, TKROWS ultiamount of Richards’s perspective mately gives back to the myth and that informs those impressions is the man that is Keith Richards in – given Mona’s inclinations – appro- a way only deep respect and sheer priate, and particularly recognizable wonder can.
list service: rolling stoned
recorded, Richards and girlfriend Anita Pallenberg were found guilty of possession for marijuana, heroine, e Servic and cocaine. They were fined, given suspended prison sentences, and banned from France for two years. tom Beedham 1973 A drug raid of Richards’s London Assembling onstage for the first time turned up marijuana, heroin, Manin 1962, releasing “The Last Time” in drax tablets, paraphernalia, as well Jan. 1965 saw The Rolling Stones earn as a .38 Smith and Wesson revolver, a number one spot on U.K. charts a shotgun and 110 rounds of ammuas well as a foray into the U.S. top nition. However, Richards got off on ten in the spring. While the success a 250-pound fine. In response to the and popularity the band received 1972 and ’73 raids, rumours circuand enjoyed long after that release lated suggesting Richards had all of was something to applaud, it also his blood replaced in a cleanup effort. resulted in guitarist Keith Richards 1977 falling into some of the most danConviction of cocaine possesgerous excesses associated with rock sion by a London, Eng. court and ‘n’ roll, and from 1967-1977, he was fined 1300 pounds after police instood before courts on drug charges vestigated a car accident involving five times. Richards has claimed he’s Richards and found 130 grams of abstained from drug use since those coke in his car. 1977 years, but the particularly dark decade of his life have left their mark Following a drug raid of his Toon the public’s perception of him. ronto hotel room that upturned 22 grams of heroin, Richards was 1967 charged with “possession of heroin A police raid of Richards’s Sussex, for the intention of trafficking” – an Eng. residence found amphetamines offense punishable with sentences in Marianne Faithfull’s (Mick Jag- of seven years to life in jail. Pleading ger’s girlfriend at the time) coat guilty to possession, Richards was pocket. Richards and Jagger received ultimately given a suspended sensentences for time in prison that tence and put on probation for a year, were ultimately suspended based with orders to continue treatment on public appeal. for heroin addiction and perform 1972 two benefit concerts on behalf of After a drug raid of the French the Canadian National Institute for villa where Exile On Main St. was the Blind.
Five drug busts that landed Keith richards in front of courts
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ArtS & CULtUrE
Yeah, I know: news sources have a responsibility to report on what’s going on and many readers are of the “Pics or it didn’t happen” philosophy, but without allowing a venue for such leaked photos, ideally there would be no market for such materials, nude leaks wouldn’t be an issue, and celebrities could maintain their private data. Anyone approving the initial distribution of photos obtained in an unlawful, invasive manner are especially shameful and should have to answer to penalizations of the same – if not greater – load as those faced by the people obtaining photographs illegally. They facilitate and promote an entire network of privacy violation. But at the same time, we need to be critical and vocal about media that are not involved in the initial publication of such images but continue to publish the images anyway. By continuing the publication of hacked images, news media perpetuate the public presence of material that are meant to be private, and thus further the exploitation of those that are victimized in the first place.
The Pop machine: a leaky system is a deficient one
Publications trafficking in unlawfully obtained images of exploitive nature should be penalized
Last weekend, nude photos of Mad Men’s Christina Hendricks and actress/model Olivia Munn to the Internet. They represent only the latest of photos acquired through cell phone or email hacking. The ethics of anyone responsible for the delivery of such leaks need no deliberation. The practice of hacking into anyone’s private data is perverted enough, but the further trafficking of such materials for personal gain is innately destructive, exploitive and predatory. In the past, in response to leaks of such nature, it appears the FBI has done what they can and acted appropriately in seeking out and charging who they can identify to be behind such depraved activities. Christopher Chaney is a self-professed celebrity hacker that allegedly hacked into the emails and cell phones of somewhere around 50 celebrities. Following an arrest on Oct. 12, 2011, he is in the middle of trials that could result in him being sentenced for up to 121 years for his alleged participation in acts privacy violations and character defamation.
“Anyone approving the initial distribution of photos obtained in an unlawful, invasive manner are especially shameful and should have to answer to penalizations of the same… load as those faced by the people obtaining photographs illegally.”
What is equally deplorable, is the tendency of news sources to publish such photos.
The purpose of V-Day is to raise awareness, and it’s important for women to be aware and feel empowered by each others’ strength to overcome the many hardships they have had to endure. However, it is equally important for men to hear their stories as well. Reaching out to men on V-Day may need to be the next step of the campaign. The more people who are made aware of violence agains women the better. The inspiring words found on the back of the program truly showcased the positive energy of the event: “Don’t ever let them silence you girl. You are sensational. What you have to say is important, it is relevant. You are undeniable, you are capable, indescribable, revolutionary. You are fucking beautiful.” Let’s hope the message and the campaign it represents can reach the ears of more men and women future years.
The u of g’s v-day chapter presented a memory, a monologue, a rant, and a Prayer at the Bullring on mar. 3 and 4.
ArtS & CULtUrE
1 6 7 .8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
a philosophy for all
Ubuntu philosophy connects people from all walks of life
When Nelson Mandela was imprisoned in South Africa for rebelling against the Apartheid regime, he recognized that he was not the only prisoner. No, he was not only recognizing the others behind bars, he was recognizing the guards. Mandela philosophically saw that these guards were imprisoned, as was anyone promoting the Apartheid regime. Imprisoned by prejudice, racism and hatred; imprisoned by misunderstanding and confusion. Mandela began to not only think of his own release from prison and his own sense of freedom, but hoped that his release would also free his guards from their own prison. It is the impactful philosophy of Ubuntu that fuelled Mandela’s belief, the sense that he was related to the guards as much as he was to his own family. Just like he was connected to those that he knew and loved, Mandela was connected to those that were creating incredible pain for him and his people. There are some who would question the sanity and thought process of Mandela, but it is this philosophy of Ubuntu that is recognized as helping South Africa move from Apartheid to Post-Apartheid without a civil war. This was a story told by Marty Molengeraaf, ecumenical campus minister and founder of Campus Ubuntu at the university, about Ubuntu philosophy at the Philopolis Conference held at Macdonald-Stewart Hall on Mar. 3. Ubuntu can be defined through its associated aphorisms. These include “I am what I am because of who we all are,” and “A person is a person through other people.” Originating from South Africa, Ubuntu is a philosophy that focuses on community and the importance that all humans are connected to each other – that we are all one community. At this seminar, the impact of Ubuntu was seen presented all different walks of life and how it could be applied. A passionate and revealing story was told by Rene Meshake on how being an Aboriginal abused in residential schools tore him of his identity and soul, transforming him into an alcoholic and eventually leaving him homeless in Toronto. Meshake then spoke about the long rehab process and how it brought him to the concept of Akina’awiia, the Aboriginal version of Ubuntu, which means “A power greater than you.” Meshake spoke about how Akina’awiia lifted the rage he carried from his time in residential schools, as it brought him to the realization that it was not about ‘I.’ It was about being one with your surroundings and everyone around you. “I cannot do this alone and still can’t, I need others” said Meshake, emphasizing a sense of community that led to him living a comfortable life as a happily married artist. Sean Higgins, a local businessman, spoke about how reading a compelling book on the philosophy of Ubuntu changed his perspectives on how to approach being a part of a business. Higgins spoke about how the failure of businesses today is that they are focused on results and not the honesty and interaction with others that Ubuntu emphasizes. Higgins translated the community motto of Ubuntu into the business world by stressing that everyone makes mistakes, and what’s important is how you recover from them. Further, we should separate the person from the mistake. The results come after that. Michael Nicholson, a fourth year student, explained the core and basic meanings of Ubuntu. Nicholson concentrated on the theme of Ubuntu being a life philosophy that focuses on the community; it’s a paradigm shift from our individualistic society to one more about the ‘us’ than the ‘I.’ Nicholson started by stating a basic Ubuntu approach. “What you want in life is a different question from what you want out of life,” Nicholson said. He continued by saying that overemphasis on individuality excludes us from connecting to others through community, concluding that Ubuntu is sustainable because of its shared reality.
from philosophy and feminism to the philosophy of chemistry to the “species problem,” the inaugural Philopolis guelph conference brought together thinkers to discuss varied topics on campus on mar. 3.
Ubuntu theme most have heard before, the belief that rather than being someone else, you should be yourself. Molengeraaf adds that we learn how to truly be ourselves, and that Ubuntu teaches us that we can all embrace each other and that difference does not mean Other. “We can live, learn and embrace each other in a multicultural experience like we do at the University of Guelph, in a way that strengthens our own faith but does not denigrate somebody elses,” said Molegraaf. He concludes that Ubuntu is not the name and origin of a philosophy as much as it is a belief held worldwide. In South Africa it is called Ubuntu, in Nigeria it is called N’Konson Konson, among the Ojibwe it is called Akina’awiia, and among ancient Peruvian culture it is called Minga. The variety of indigenous cultures that have practised a similar concept of Ubuntu speaks to how the philosophy is embraced. In a society that shuns any belief that goes against the grain, the concept of Ubuntu may naturally seem difficult to accept. But as this Philophis seminar highlights, Ubuntu is a philosophy that can be applied to a wide variety of people, culture, and practices that can keep our core values intact, but teach us to respect and embrace others more in the sense that we are all one community of people. For more information on Ubuntu, you can go to Campus Ubuntu at McNally House on 377 Gordon St, across from Alexander Hall.
“we can live, learn and embrace each other in a multicultural experience like we do at the University of guelph, in a way that strengthens our own faith but does not denigrate somebody elses.” –Marty Molengeraaf
Marty Molengeraaf explains a variety of Ubuntu concepts, first telling a story about a British woman living in Canada, who was trying to become more of a Canadian. Molengeraaf notes that Canada needs her to be British because that is who she is. It is a story that exemplifies the
w w w.t h e on ta r ion . c om
sPorts & health
huge air, wave riding and complex tricks
Dylan Rea, a fourth year UofG student shares insight into the adrenaline-pumping world of kiteboarding. sasha odesse: how did you get into kiteboarding? what attracted you to it as a sport? Dylan Rea: I got into kiteboarding at a pretty young age when I saw people riding in the bay next to my cottage. At the time, there were only five or six people doing it but you could count on them being there every single windy day. It was amazing seeing people boosting huge air and I was surprised that with so many kite lines crisscrossing each other they managed to avoid tangling themselves up! Eventually, a friend of mine took a lesson and after seeing him ride, I was hooked. so: what are some of the dangers associated with kiteboarding? DR: Kiteboarding can be very dangerous for beginners or during times when the weather is unpredictable. As with any extreme sport, it’s important that you are always cautious– the kites are enormously powerful and if they are used improperly you can get seriously hurt. That being said, if you are taught proper kite safety and control by an experienced kiteboarder then the sport can be very safe– just be sure not to ride during bad weather! so: how did you learn? DR: I was taught to kiteboard when I was around 13 [years old] by a close friend. At the time, there was only one kiteboarding school and kiteboarding lessons were much too expensive for me. These days, there are far more kiteboarding schools around and lessons are cheaper. Like most extreme sports, you cannot learn to kiteboard unless you are taught by an experienced teacher. so: where are some of your favourite places to kiteboard? DR: My favourite place to ride is in Sauble Beach or Oliphant, Ontario. I learned to ride in Oliphant and my family now lives there permanently. Oliphant has terrific flat water but on really windy days Sauble has some killer waves to ride. If you are looking for something a little more exciting, a relatively cheap kiteboarding vacation spot is the Outer Banks in North Carolina. You can drive there in less than 15 hours and the wind is very reliable.
if you’re looking for a thrilling sport, kiteboarding is sure to get your adrenaline pumping
so: what are some of the expenses of kiteboarding? DR: Kiteboarding can be expensive at the onset but buying gear is an investment. Unlike snowboarding or skiing (which have similar upfront costs), once you have your kiteboarding equipment you never have to buy any lift tickets—-the wind is free! You can expect to pay around 300 dollars for a day-long lesson, which usually provides you with enough experience to continue the learning process on your own. Buying all of the equipment itself can run anywhere from 700 dollars (if you purchase second hand equipment) all the way up to 2000 dollars for new equipment. Expect to pay at least 1000 dollars to get yourself started with a harness, kite, bar/ lines, and board if you choose to buy directly from a retailer. so: what would you say/advice would you give to people who were interested in getting into kiteboarding? Take a lesson! This advice is generally overstated but it always applies– the sport requires instruction or it can be very dangerous. If you are even mildly interested in kiteboarding or if you are a thrill seeker, you need to try this sport! I have met very few people who have tried kiteboarding and have not followed it as a lifelong passion. There is something uniquely addicting about the feeling of kiteboarding and the pursuit of wind. The sport truly has something for everyone– huge air, wave riding, powerful and complex tricks, and even just the feeling of cruising through the water. Every kiteboarder will tell you: after your first (usually brief) ride, you will be helplessly addicted!
golf club at franks
fundraising as well,” said Wright, 75 and 100 people who actually though the name of the drink fea- show up,” said Wright. sasha odesse As for the overall demographic ture was not revealed. of the night, as one might expect Frank & Steins not only gives On Wednesday March 7, at 10 p.m. Gryphon athletes VIP access into of a varsity event, there were the Guelph Gryphons varsity golf the bar, but also helps support the certainly “Gryphons supporting team held a fundraising event for teams in a number of ways simi- Gryphons” in attendance, but also their trip to nationals, Gryphon lar to this. a lot of other students as well. style. The night was a success In terms of how many peo“A lot of my friends are on the overall and featured a mixed audi- ple were expected to show up, golf-team and we’re not allowed ence of athletes, Gryphon friends Wright mentioned that, on top of to invite team members, so I think and fans alike. Franks’ Wednesday night regulars, it will be mostly students who are The day before the event, each teammate also committed not on varsity teams [at the pub],” athletes Stephen Wright and Al- to helping increase attendance said Forbes. exander Forbes stopped by The by spreading the news through “Golf is seen more as a leisure Ontarion to share the scoop on word-of-mouth and their social sport, so I think we’ll also get the details of the night. media sites. the people who are recreational “As a personal goal we’ve tried golfers [at the event]. Especially “It will be $2 cover and $2 for coat check and Franks is giving us the to get five friends per teammate because athleticism in golfing is proceeds from both,” said Forbes. [to come out], so that works out a relatively new concept,” added “We will also get the profits to about 120 to 150 people. We’re Wright. of a featured drink towards our guessing that we’ll get in between The money raised from the
it’s a pun, get it?
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event will go towards the costs associated with the team’s trip to Victoria including travel expenses, entry fees, accommodations, food and transport around B.C, that the chosen team representatives would otherwise have to come up with on their own. While the coach decides which team memebers will make the trip out West, the team must wait in anticipation. “We’re sitting on pins and needles right now” said Wright. Both team members agreed that in addition to the night being a fun time, it’s a great way for students to support their Guelph athletes while also being a part of the initial development of the team. The team is also hoping that their results at nationals will help
increase awareness of the team on-campus as well as encourage golf athletes to try-out for the team. At this point in the game the Gryphons have a leg-up on the competition having had the opportunity to train throughout the winter thanks to their new training program, whereas other schools might only have a month after exams to prepare. “We’ve been doing this the whole winter, hitting balls indoors and I think it’s definitely going to help us out,” said Forbes. In case you missed this one, there is another fundraiser pub night for the team in the works. For updates check out the University of Guelph Men’s and Women’s Varsity Golf page on Facebook.
SPOrtS & HEALtH
1 6 7 .8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
erg-a-Thon helps a tonne
Everyone knows the stereotype: tough, arrogant, rude, a bully, your typical jock. However more and more often athletes are proving this stereotype incorrect and making a difference in the community. This is one of those moments. I am proud to report that the Gryphons Rowing team is doing just that. Mar. 5 marked the first ever Erg-A-Thon. For those of you that don’t know an erg is a stationary rowing machine. The event was held in the UC courtyard from 10a.m. to 3p.m. this past Monday and was bustling with participants form eight different teams. Teams consisted of 10 - 12 people each made up of varsity rowing members, Right to Play club members and friends. Each team member spent 30min on the erg machine and speaking from experience that is quite a workout! The event was a fundraiser for the rowing team, whose equipment is expensive, receives little to no funding and needs to purchase new erg machines for their winter training. The team partnered with the on-campus chapter of Right to Play to also raise funds and awareness for a worthy cause. Right to Play is an international humanitarian organization that uses the power of sport and play to promote health, development and peace among the children and youth of some of the world’s most disadvantaged areas. Each participant was asked to raise a minimum of $50, observers could donate to a team during the event, purchase goodies at the bake sale or challenge a varsity rower to an erg-off. The teams rowed over 300,000m in just five hours and raised over $3,000 which will be split 50:50 between the organizations. Emily Jago, a two-year rowing team member, expressed that it is important to the team to be involved with and help out other clubs on campus and raise awareness. “We know just as much as they do how hard it is to raise money and support.” Zakiya Pirani, co-president of the Right to Play club is not only pleased with the funds raised at the event but also of the initiative that Guelph students and Gryphon athletes are taking and is proud of “the way that two clubs from different
gryphon rowers partner up with right to Play for erg-a-Thon event
areas of the university came to- mention goes to Erg-A-Thon team gether to make a difference”. ‘The Argg-A-Thoners’ for raising Of course the real winners of the the most money. day are the Gryphons rowing team For more information about and Right to Play, however special Right to Play and how you can donate or become involved visit www.righttoplay.com. For all information about our Gryphons rowing team visit www.gryphons.ca
uest for students hting World Hunger req Similarly, Universities Fig t votes. Perhaps most of ir studen ed in with 67.53 per cent llots and have selected the from the Unit to pay $0.50 was vot tudents have cast their ba to eliminate bottled water coming year. Students no was the referendum entatives for the up per cent, inspiring government repres representative of voted in favour with 78.62 Guelph campus. Students ecutives, but also At-Large ironment. versity of only voted on the CSA Ex as follows: a sustainable campus env ating that students value e winning candidates are mbers. Acdemonstr each academic college. Th duced some disturbing nu ver, the election also pro ed in the Howe ics, only 3, 967 student vot Maniacco Kavaratzis, Br ye-Anne to the voter turn out statist felt that they cording College of Arts: Steven : David Alton, of the student population Applied Human Sciences ctions. Only 20 per cent CSA ele nt. College of Social and to their student governme needed to add their voice voted in if mrata Tilokani Na didates can only be ence: Jessica Tarka To put in perspective, can ndum College of Biological Sci ence: Paul Caruso t body votes, while refere gineering Sci 10 per cent of the studen llege of Physical and En general Co ones cent. This year’s CSA llege: Anthony Blurton-J questions require 20 per Ontario Agriculture Co m. Despite the lack of election barely made quoru re ction we d CSA is dedicated and en were presented in the ele student support, the electe erendum questions that student UniverAll ref CSA clubs ue to work to better ed to vote on whether the thusiastic, and will contin passed. Students were ask use Café should receive r. nger and TeaTree Ho interests in the coming yea sities Fighting World Hu TeaTree House Café’s student fees. The support through increased h 61.18 per cent. $0.10, was voted “yes” wit st that students pay reque
HUmAn reSoUrceS & oPerAtionS
How do you think your experience as this year’s Human Resource and Operations commissioner will help you move forward next year with your platform? As a returning commissioner, I have had the opportunity to interact with the different services and staff over the last 10 months. As a result, I have a strong understanding of everyone’s roles. Furthermore, I have a good understanding of the timeline of events at the CSA, which will only help me to do my job more efficiently the second time around. This information allows me to make informed decisions, and create positive and meaningful change within the CSA. The transition period between April and June will be an opportunity for me to get a jump-start on initiatives and projects this year. Could you explain how the continuation of your role will effect how you plan to meet your platform promises, such as student space? Are you looking forward to the opportunity of participating in the space task force as the Human Resource and Operations commissioner? My established relationships with key decision makers at this institution will play a key role with addressing student space. Continued participation with The Study Space Task Force will help carry the momentum in the new academic year. Rather than repeating previous discussions and questions, I will be in a position to brainstorm and discuss solutions. What were some of your biggest challenges this year as Human Resource and Operations Commissioner? Do you anticipate those problems nest year, and how do you plan to address them? Being responsible for the Human Resources at an organization is a little intimidating for a new commissioner. I hope to draw upon my skills and experiences gained over the year to be a better supervisor, resource and role model to the staff in the CSA. Some of the projects and initiatives I took on this year were rather large, and required several semesters of research and consultation. With the opportunity to work another year, I can finish projects currently in progress. In addition I’ll have the opportunity to evaluate and reflect on some of my completed initiatives.
AcAdemic & UniverSity AffAirS commiSSioner
In what way do you think the Academic and University Affairs Commissioner can help improve the university experience for students? The Academic & University Affairs Commissioner’s (AUAC…maybe pronounced ahhuuuaaak!?) main function is to be a strong voice and support for students’ academic rights on this campus. One improvement for students may be the extra support that the AUAC can provide when you are trying to sort out how to apply for deferred exams, request financial assistance or academic consideration, experiencing discrimination in the classroom, or any other matter that you are unsure of that relates to the multitude of policies/rules/procedures we have at the university. One of the reasons I was so interested in this position was to turn the lengthy and dense policies and procedures into something more understandable and practical. If you need any help on matters related to academics or university policies. Come talk to me! That’s what I’m here for. Are there any specific issues that you consider a priority, or is there anything you hope to address or work on first when you assume the position? I have always considered accessibility a priority, and this will undoubtedly continue during my time as AUAC. I hope to strengthen the Accessibility Working Group, and continue initiatives that started there, including students with (dis)abilities group on campus similar to the many other Special Status Groups that provide space for marginalized students in a student-controlled space, and resolving issues surrounding attendant care that have been identified over the years. You ran unopposed. Do you have any plans to raise awareness or involvement with the CSA, specifically what is included in your position’s portfolio? The other priority I have is to increase student seats and involvement in decision-making processes. I expect this to facilitate greater involvement in the CSA and other campus organizations, as well as raise awareness of the AUAC portfolio. There are more students and workers on this campus than heads of corporations. Why do corporations have more representatives at the highest decision-making body on campus, the Board of Governors, than students and workers do? I think proportional representation is fairer than the current system we have in place. I will do my best to fight for increased student and worker representation in university decisions– they affect us and we deserve to be part of the process.
locAl AffAirS commiSSioner
Do you have any specific goals you hope to accomplish during your term? I really want to make sure I’m doing a lot with the transit issues we currently have. I don’t know what I specifically want to do yet, but I know I want to take them on and I think it is going to depend a lot on how I work with the city and what I’m able to do. Right now the routes really aren’t working for students. I definitely want to work on that. The other big area I want to promote is the Awareness of Sexual Assault and Prevention (ASAP) committee. I want to work on raising the profile of that committee and really helping students become aware of those resources that they have on campus. What would you say is your top priority and is? Transit is definitely my top priority. When I was doing my campaigning and I had my Facebook group, I had a poll on there and asked “which issue in the local affairs portfolio do you think needs the most attention?” and transit was far ahead of everything else so I think that needs to be my first priority. Do you have any plans to raise awareness of the other issues that the local affairs commissioner? I really want to work with the community and get people more aware of what’s going on in the community. A lot of people in Guelph have conceptions about students, and I want to work towards changing that. Just being more aware of the people around us and being more aware of Guelph. Have there been any things ongoing that you’re aware of from the outgoing commissioner? He has a lot of things that he wants me to continue on. One thing for example and I want to continue it over the summer was a series of videos about living in a community. For example, one of them would be about “how to properly throw a party” and just outline the respectful things you would do there. I think there’s definitely a lot of ongoing things, that’s just one of them.
commUnicAtionS & corPorAte AffAirS
externAl AffAirS commiSSioner
What do you think are the most important aspects of the External Affairs Commissioner’s portfolio? This portfolio is responsible for a number of important aspects that I am both committed to working on and am particularly excited about. Advocating for the rights and interests of students on a number of levels is crucial, while acting as a resource on provincial and federal decisions and policies is essential. I think it is also really important for Guelph to have strong relations with other student unions and associations in order to be a part of a greater student movement, and to learn from their successes and challenges in order to inform our efforts here. A dedication to social and environmental justice, the organizing of strong campaigns, and providing students with a number of opportunities to get involved in ways they feel both comfortable with and excited about is essential. What do you hope to work on first once you assume the position? Aside from getting a good handle on the position and the work that has already been accomplished in this portfolio, I hope to be building strong relations with the other commissioners and taking the first steps to put my platform into action. I am excited to explore ideas for campaigns that students and groups feel they can work collaboratively on, including a campaign on tuition fees and other areas pertaining to social and environmental justice. I will begin by asking important questions concerning provincial and federal decisions and policies affecting students, as well as begin finding out where funding is coming from for our university. I hope to be building relations with other student unions and associations in order to explore what they are working on. How do you plan to get feedback from students on the issues that this position represents? In terms of acquiring feedback and input from students, I feel strongly about speaking with students directly and ensuring they are aware of this position and how this portfolio relates to them. I am dedicated to reaching out to students and working closely with groups and individuals on a number of projects in order to ensure feedback and direction along the way. I see the importance of using social media as a form of communication and I am committed to creating a forum for students to ask important questions concerning decisions that impact them. I am not coming into this position with a set agenda and my goals are flexible and open to being responsive to the interests and needs of students. I am approachable and dedicated to open communication and collaboration.
What are the next steps you plan to take in order to phase out bottled water? Students have voted 80 per cent in favor of phasing out bottled water sales on campus. I firmly believe that water is a human right. The vote at University of Guelph was a small victory in the fight against water privatization and for sustainability in Canada. The next step locally is to meet with Hospitality Services and the University of Guelph administration and make sure they live up to their commitment to sustainability and respect the democratic voice of students. We are totally willing to talk and figure out the best way to phase out bottled water and bring in more public drinking fountains. I will continue to work with the rest of the CSA Executive to make this central to the CSA’s work for the next year. When can students expect the new CSA website to be available to them? The new CSA website is now officially under construction! Myself and other staff at the CSA have been working on this since Nov. and we’re now in the final development stage. The CSA website will be available to them in April. Students will have a chance to check it out before enjoying their summer break. The hope is that it will become a tool for students to provide feedback directly to the CSA. Working on promotion of the site and integrating social media effectively will also be a project that continues into the Fall as many students return. What were some of your biggest challenges this year as Communications and Corporate Affairs Commissioner? Do you anticipate those problems next year, and how do you plan to address them? We need to increase membership/involvement at the Board of Directors level and voter turnout in the elections. Strong promotional campaigns are certainly part of this, but it’s not as simple as that. Making sure students see the CSA as outwardly focused and advocating on their behalf will generate interest in the organization. Also, making sure there is that direct contact with our members. We need to break the “CSA bubble,” reach beyond involving only student leaders and people directly connected to the CSA, and speak directly to students about things that matter to them and challenges that they face. I plan on holding office hours and tabling for campaigns at least once a week in the fall and winter semesters as a step towards this general strategy. The CSA is only as strong as student involvement so this is at the top of the list of priorities!
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SPOrtS & HEALtH
why you should reconsider wheat
Consider the reality that humans have only begun eating grains in abundance for 10,000 years, starting at the brink of the agricultural revolution. That may seem like a long time, but it only accounts for about 0.4 per cent of human existence, and from an evolutionary standpoint this is the blink of an eye. There is no doubt that we have started to genetically adapt to relying on grains since then, but many suggest that 10,000 years isn’t nearly long enough for significant genetic adaption to occur. Especially when we acknowledge that both human stature and brain size decreased once we adopted a grain-based diet during the agricultural revolution. It is important to consider the recent hybridization and crossbreeding that happens with the wheat plant. It is now considered a high-yield dwarf because it is about two-and-a-half feet shorter than conventional wheat from 50 years ago, and its stockiness can support a heavier seedbed. Not only does this plant grow much faster but it is resistant to drought and fungi, and these hybrids contain proteins found in neither parent plant. Their safety for human consumption has absorption of many important never been questioned. minerals. These phytates bind to It is difficult to ignore that one calcium, magnesium, iron and per cent of people have full-blown zinc. There are also lectins which celiac disease, a medical condi- are shown to bind to insulin reception in which the small intestine tors and our intestinal lining, and is damaged by gluten (found in also seem to cause leptin resistance wheat and other grains) to the (difficulty regulating appetite). To point where the body isn’t able recap, these toxins worsen the to absorb nutrients necessary for features of metabolic syndrome; good health. It is also believed that a group of risk factors including gluten intolerance affects a third diabetes, high blood pressure and of the population with some sta- heart disease. tistics stating as many as 50-70 Another interesting protein per cent of people are sensitive to that is unique to wheat is gliadin, gluten. A study by Dr. Kenneth which has the ability to cross into Fine found that 29 per cent of as- the brain and bind to opiate recepymptomatic (non-celiac) people tors. These wheat exorphins cause courtesy tested positive for anti-gliadin IgA a subtle euphoria in some people. in their stool. This is an antibody This is why wheat products are produced in the gut after sensing believed to increase appetite and to health, but it leads to an accu- potassium. And with grains forman impending threat– from wheat. cause addition-like behaviours in mulation of visceral (abdominal) ing the base of the food pyramid Some symptoms of gluten intol- certain individuals. Beyond these fat, diabetes and pre-diabetes, with a suggestion of 6-8 servings erance or sensitivity are; weight mentioned proteins, there are over cataracts, arthritis and heart dis- per day, it is difficult to ignore loss or gain, nutritional deficien- 1000 other proteins in wheat that ease. Dr. William Davis, author of the advice. But there is absolutecies, gastro-intestinal problems have potential for odd or unex- ‘Wheat Belly’ states that when his ly nothing in wheat or grains that (such as bloating and gas), aching pected responses. patients eliminate wheat from their can’t be obtained elsewhere in the joints, depression, eczema, irritaThe easily-digestible complex diet, the average daily calorie in- diet, especially from a huge salad. bility, exhaustion, the list goes on. carbohydrate, amylopectin A is take drops about 400 calories per The government makes it seem as While gluten is the most dis- also something unique to wheat. day with reports of less hunger and if grains are absolutely essential for cussed toxin these days, there are This type of sugar explains why less cravings. health, but with access to healthy plenty of other toxins and anti- two slices of whole wheat bread Many argue that there are im- meats, fruits and vegetables, their nutrients found in wheat. Grains will increase blood sugar higher portant vitamins and minerals necessity is all but eliminated. Ask contain large amounts of phytic than many candy bars. Having high in wheat such as vitamins B1 and yourself, is wheat really benefiting acid, which strongly inhibits the blood sugar is not only detrimental B2, magnesium and iron, zinc and your body and your health?
THIS SEMESTER, THE T O AY ONTARION IS HOSTING A DAY R I D A S T I S F R D ! PHOTO CONTEST! L IT BMR C H 2 3 T H E T H E M E I S SU
EMAIL OUR PHOTO & GRAPHICS E D I TO R AT: ONPHOTO@ UOGUELPH .CA
AND WE ARE NOW A C C E P T I N G SUBMISSIONS, SO SEND IN YOUR M O S T C R E AT I V E PORTRAIT SHOTS.
P R I Z E S
W I L L B E ANNOUNCED!
SPOrtS & HEALtH
1 6 7 .8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
gryphons bring it on: dance Pak vs. cheerleaders
The contrast between the dance pak and cheer squad: not the similarities you would imagine
Media portrayals and fictional stories can give the misconception that the dance pak and cheerleaders share striking similarities. But the similarities between the two teams are not found on the surface or in what they perform, they are found through the concept of being a team, shared experiences of stereotypes and thanklessly dedicating themselves to their craft for the love of it. Ironically, many but not all of the contrasts between the cheerleaders and dance pak can be found on the surface of what they do. Like most sports, dance and cheerleading require dedication. This is true for the dance pak in which most of the 23 members started dance at a young age. Dance pak member Jessie Sawyers, planned on quitting dance altogether in university until her heather sZentimrey roommate from the same childhood dance studio convinced her The athleticism of gryphon cheerleaders and dance pak are often to try out. Now she finds herself overlooked in favour of less accurate stereotypes about the teams as co-captain of the team in her third year. the two are. Dancing is really here who want to give back to “When you’re younger it’s more about the expression,” Sawyers the community. We think it repabout getting the basics of jazz, responded. resents our school well,” said ballet and tap down. In dance pak Dance pak co-captain Olivia Szentimrey. we mainly focus on jazz and lyri- Castiglione adds to the comparAs agile as both teams are, in cal and we have about six or seven ison by mentioning that “if you the school community they candancers who are passionate about watch cheerleading it’s more not avoid the stereotypes society about flips and throws, and if has placed upon them. tap,” said Sawyers. In comparison, the 36 mem- you watch [the dance pak] side “People always ask ‘do you bers of the cheer squad start at of it it’s more of the art side of guys hate the cheerleaders?’ said a variety of times in their life. dance. Cheerleading is more Sawyers. “As well as asking ‘are Some cheerleaders started in about acrobatics and big, excit- you guys better than the cheerhigh school, such as fourth year ing movements compared to [the leaders?’ and I always say well cheer squad member Heather dance pak] which is more con- we’re not comparable so I can’t Szentimrey. temporary and emotional.” answer that. Both our teams have “If you were start off at a young A similarity that is not com- stigmas around us and people age there are teams like Scorpi- monly related in outside circles just assume things, it’s funny on and Sharks where you have to between cheer and dance squads because everyone seems to have travel for competitions, but there is the dedication both teams have this opinion that we are against are many avenues to start cheer- in regards to practice, fundrais- each other but we are supportleading,” said Szentimrey. ing and community involvement. ing the same school and we don’t The relevant contrast between With the cheer squad practic- compete against each other so I both teams is on the surface of ing three times a week for three would rather see them succeed what they do: their style of dance hours each practice and the dance than not succeed.” and/or art. pak practicing for seven hours on “A lot of people that think be“I can understand the similar- Sunday and three hours on Mon- cause of the stereotypes that ity but they are quite different. day, both are clearly hardworking. we’re supposed to be some beauCheerleading is about showing Both teams live for the compe- tiful, vein, shallow creatures. people what kind of crazy stunts titions, but they also must pay for But that’s not the case there’s and tumbling we can do, it’s re- these competitions themselves so many people on my team that ally high energy. We’re taught through fundraising. On top of are really great, smart people,” to be showy and show people a that, both teams are active in the said Szentimrey. In reality there is nothing but good time. It’s a different kind of community. mutual respect for each team as showmanship,” said Szentimrey. “It’s to show the community “If you’ve never done dance or who we are, that students aren’t both are part of the UofG commucheerleading it’s really hard to just a bunch of crazy, partying, nity and respect their differences understand how vastly different riled up people. There are people in style and performance.
gryphons in history
Published in The Ontarion on June 10, 1980. Good ol’ “Flying Disks” have been around since the ‘30s, starting with cake pans and evolving into what we know know as the Frisbee but it would seem that in 1980, the University of Guelph campus saw a boom in these fancy disks. The article highlights the importance of weight, disk-care and retail prices (five to nine dollars!) and advertises for an upcoming tournament on campus. While the “primary attraction” of the Frisbee is their being their ability to “soar, fly, ski, roll, hover [and] boomerang,” Geoff Smither, the Guelph athlete in this image, demonstrates one of the many tricks in the “advanced art of Freestyle Frisbee.”
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SPOrtS & HEALtH
hot cousins and cold showers
Long the practice of only psychopaths, soldiers, superspies, tough ancient Greeks, people trying not to cheat on their spouse with their hot cousin, and the extremely poor, cold showers are making a comeback. The reason isn’t entirely due to the recession or sudden preponderance of hot cousins either: the damned thing seems to provide health benefits. What brought the first recent wave of folks to the cold shower may have been its purported benefits for the skin. The online world is full of anecdotal evidence claiming that cold showers can be beneficial for acne sufferers. The supposed method of action differs in these accounts, as do the suggested means of application. One school claims that hot showers are contributing to acne by stripping the skin of its natural oils and drying it out, and that a move to cold only showers clears up these problems and the acne with it. Another suggests beginning with a warm shower, to help remove dirt and oil, and then a cold shower to close up the pores, the acne being attributed to open pores throughout the day. It’s difficult to adjudicate to the anti-depressant claim is a between these two schools, and study claiming that either cold or they may well both be right (or sudden changes in temperature wrong) depending on the cause of stimulate noradrenaline secrethe person’s acne, but the basic tion, an aid against depression. division between combiners and Again, advocates differ on whethgo-cold-or-go-homers is one er the cold should follow heat or that can be seen throughout the define the shower experience. world of cold shower advocates. Those who claim that cold A second skin-based claim showers do anything but lower for cold showers is that they the sex drive (as many of us and reduce the signs of aging. The our hot cousins provide sorry, argument follows a similar line shameful proof of), appear in to the acne one, with dryness, contrast to lack any doubt that oils, and pores featuring prom- a cold-only shower is the way to inently, and a similar division go. The claimed scientific basis is existing between whether the that the cold stimulates the procold should be combined with duction of testosterone (in those heat or if the showerer should inclined to produce testosterone), forgo heat altogether. This ben- which in turn turns them into efit appears more dodgy, another towering idols of unquenchable in a long line of anti-aging claims, sexual power. (However, the cold and conflicts somewhat with the also injures sperm cells less than acne claims: the current predom- the heat, so try to otherwise ininance of hot showers should be jure them through bicycle riding producing wrinkly, zit covered or drug use if you’re considerfolk in droves, and they don’t ap- ing sex with someone who can pear that prevalent. But perhaps get pregnant. Or maybe through they’ve become shut-ins. cooking them in a hot shower Cold showers are lately win- first….) ning fans on slightly more Finally, cold showers have also substantive claims though, as been pegged as a weight loss and they’ve been pegged as a useful muscle gain tool. They’re usetools in the battle against depres- ful as a weight loss tool because sion and low sex drives. The key shivering tricks the body into
treating fat cells differently, apparently unkindly. The muscle-building qualities of cold showers kick in for similar reasons: when the body shivers it releases hormones that benefit muscle growth (though it sounds like you still have to lift weights
and such in tandem with this, so it’s not quite the miracle muscle method one might hope). Outside of a small clique of Russian Olympic weightlifters, these benefits are thankfully touted without a substantial body of people advocating that the shower begin hot.
Beth’s craft corner
Make your own cookie jar
Beth Purdon mcLeLLan
Here’s a gift that is always a refreshing surprise. The trick to this gift is to pick a recipe with ingredients that have lots of different textures and colours. For this craft, I chose caramel oatmeal cookies. you will need: Mason Jar Ribbon Piece of decorative paper or card stock 1 C brown sugar 1/2 C white sugar 1 ¼ C flour 1/2 tsp baking soda 1tsp salt 3 C instant oats 1 C caramel chips how to make it: For this craft, you only include the dry cookie ingredients in the jar. Write out the wet ingredients on your cardstock with baking instructions. For this recipe, your instructions would be: Preheat oven to 325 F add 2 eggs, 2 tsp of vanilla and 1 C butter place on a greased cookie sheet and bake for 12 min Layer your dry ingredients in the jar. Remember that ingredients
1 6 7 . 8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
make your own stereographic planet in Photoshop
Start with the image that you want to make your planet from. It helps to pick one with a level horizon line-
Next, select Filter>DistortPolar Coordinates, and in the pop-up window choose ‘Rectangular to Polar’ The first step is to crop or stretch the image into a square. A tip for stretching images easily is with the free transform tool (ctrl T on Windows, cmd T on Macs)aBi lemak
like white sugar and flour will quickly sink to the bottom. You might find it takes a couple tries to get it to layer the way you want. Usually people who receive this gift aren’t particularly concerned, and that the cookie mix might not stay in the jar for very long anyways.
Finally, using the free transform tool again, rotate your planet to the angle of your choosing. Once you have a square image, rotate your image 180 degrees by selecting Image>Image rotation> 180°all images By marianne Pointner
Those eyes so deep and soulful, and with a tender smile that could melt your heart: the perfect disguise for patrolling the campus for dweebs’ lunch money. look at that face. no one was going to believe them when they say that allie was the one taking it. and what’s she going to spend it on? more t-shirts? your damn right she is. she looks good in those t-shirts.
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original point: consent being this stage in university that con- away at any time. fidence is sexy. Now for some reason, there’s freely and enthusiastically given. Great, so now that we’ve es- this trend that when anyone Why would that be sexy? Well, tablished that consent is in fact brings up the topic of consent, it’s the difference between “okay, sexy maybe we should go back it’s met with rolled eyes. Some- fine” and “@#$% yes I want (you) even a step further and figure out how many of us have forgotten to [verb] my/your [noun]!” Enwhat the heck consent is. Con- that it means so much more than thusiasm is definitely a desired sent is about giving permission for just preventing sexual assault, but trait in a sexual partner, and something to happen. It’s about actually serves a greater purpose while it can serve plenty of other giving your partner permission in enhancing your sexual en- purposes (connecting partners, to engage in whatever kind of counters. It promotes essential reproduction, etc.), sex is supsex you happen to enjoy (I use communication and it ensures posed to be fun. Why not use the term sex loosely here– it can that there’s respect if your rela- actively asking for and giving be for any kind of sexual activity, tionship (whether we’re talking consent part of the sexy banter including a kiss). It’s about being about a one-night stand or a leading up to whatever sexual acable to give permission to allow long-term romantic partnership). tivities you and your partner want someone else access to your body. Okay, now let’s go back to my to engage in? It has to exist in any kind of sexual encounter, even if you’ve had sex with your partner hundreds of times before or assumed that “date night” would end in sex. Maybe what’s more important rrrolling up more with the odds of winning, it is a case of misidentification of which to understand is that consent is can help you win, witnessed occasions are impornot the absence of saying no. It’s tant that leads some to believing actually saying yes. And this has but it can’t help your they can better their chances at to be saying yes freely, not saying chances winning by playing more. yes because of some kind of exIt is important that the diction ternal threat. It can also be taken tom Beedham used by the Tim Hortons compaEvery year, we know when it’s ny when discussing odds reads here. Red coffee cups begin to that participators have “one in dominate our fields of vision as six chances to win,” rather than some abandon the franchises they saying “one in six cups win.” The normally frequent, and others wording of the latter claim would even leave their Earth-friendly imply the certain circumstance mugs at home for a chance to win that for every six cups purchased, Roll Up the Rim to Win. one cup will be a winner, a sceRoll Up the Rim has become so nario that, given the scrambled popular that inventor Paul Kind distribution of winning cups, is has even created a device called practically impossible to control. the Rimroller, a tool intended for When people suggest they can ininclusion on any seasoned contest crease their chances at winning participator’s keychain. A piece of by playing more, this is the obplastic that might resemble a rab- servation they are falsely lending bit’s foot if you look at it with the their belief to, but it’s not entirely right kind of eyes, for some, the their fault. dedication to rim rolling contests By saying “one in six chances to that the low-tech gadget repre- win,” Tim Hortons’ copy is sucsents might even serve as a good cessfully vague, leaving it open to luck charm. interpretation that there could be Whether items like the Rim- an observable occasion wherein roller carry any mystical powers one in six cups turns up a winner. or not is a debate of faculties that Really they only offer a simplified I can only adopt a decidedly ag- account of an observed case in nostic stance on. What I can argue which slightly more than 16 per is that it is a statistical certain- cent of all Roll Up the Rim cups ty that– while many will argue printed win. that playing more will increase The Tim Horton’s promotional their chances at winning– there scheme offers one in six chances are no possible ways to improve at winning Roll Up the Rim. Those one’s chances at winning, or are the odds, and you’re stuck spinning probability to work in with them. But if you ignore the their favour. way statistics work (like many As Scottish philosopher David of the people obsessed with the Hume taught, nothing is chance. thrill of possibly winning someIf things happened by chance, thing as big as a vehicle or as small they would occur without causes. as a free coffee will do) the idea He uses this argument to account that buying more will increase for how people believe things like your chances at winning makes probability to work. for a great justification in faHe says that we draw a direct vour of increased consumption. relationship between witnessed And that’s exactly what Timmies occasions and the probability of – and any other franchise or group outcomes. pitching buy/play “for a chance In the case of Roll Up the Rim to win” contests want you to do. and other play/buy to win contest That’s how it works. Play at scenarios that supply contestants your own discretion.
sex geek: The what and why of consent
Consent, given freely and enthusiastically, is one of the sexiest things anyone can say. Actually, let’s back that up for a minute. Have you ever heard the tagline “consent is sexy”? Well, have you ever stopped to wonder why we’d claim such a thing? I have a couple of theories. First of all, it’s sexy to know that you have consent. What’s not sexy is when you’re stumbling around hoping that you partner might not notice and say something when you take off their pants. It’s way better to be able to know “awesome, my partner told me that they want this” rather than thinking Consent leads to confidence. “please don’t tell me to stop.” You can have confidence that your It’s also really sexy to be asked partner is actually interested (and for consent. Why? Because it enjoying) whatever the two of means that your partner has re- you are doing, but also confidence spect for you and your desires. in feeling comfortable engaging in And while I only have anecdotal sexual activity knowing that your evidence of this from discussions partner respects you enough to with friends, respect is a massive stop if you don’t want to continue. turn-on. And I think we’ve all learned by
“it’s also really sexy to be asked for consent. why? because it means that your partner has respect for you and your desires.”
“Please play again”
1 6 7 . 8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
Bones and their juicy middles
Growing up, one of my favourite meals was lamb chops. We ate them a lot. Some mint jelly, brussels sprouts and roast potatoes. Every part of that meal is practically perfect, but the best part of lamb chops was when your bone had a bit of marrow in it. Lamb chops are small, and you’d never get more than a small spoonful of it, but at the end of the meal nothing was more satisfying than scooping it out and slurping it back. It was my favourite. Which is why it surprised me so much that I’d never simply made a meal of marrow. You can buy marrowbones at most butcher shops and plenty of grocery stores. I’ve always known that they are pretty useful for thickening soups, but never really thought to just eat them on their own. My memory of marrow is always with roasted meats, so that was my first inclination. A lot of recipes seem to call for boiling the bones, but I didn’t think that would be as good, so I ignored it. I arranged them on a baking tray with some seeded tomatoes and garlic– more on those later– and baked them at about 350 F for however long one episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer is. I think I probably could have left it in shorter, but online recipes called for everything from 20 minutes to an hour, so I just waited until it looked well cooked. I usually eat marrow with a spoon, but general consensus was to spread it on toast, so that’s what I did. It’s relatively easy to get out of the bones, but it might require some flipping and rotating and careful aiming with your knife to get it all out. It’s smooth and buttery and spreads well. I ate it with brussels sprouts out of nostalgia purposes which I salted, buttered, and mixed with roasted garlic, diced up. The roasted tomatoes I added to the toast and marrow. The first slice I ate all on its lonesome, just to see what it had to offer. It was great. All it needed was a little salt. I added the roasted tomato to the next slice, and it was as good, if not better. I went through my pantry picking out different accoutrements that I could adorn
my new favourite food with, and had some winners and some losers. Worcestershire sauce was a bit too overpowering, as was HP Sauce
and sriracha. Each of them was all I could taste. There were a couple winners though, aside from the tomato, namely anchovy paste (I
used Patum Peperium, but you can be less fancy than me if you like), lemon juice or a couple drops of chipotle hot sauce.
in season: Beauregard sweet potato quesadilla
Hello hungry reader. This is definitely my most experimental dish yet, but I promise you wont be disappointed. Seriously, I’m surprised how good this actually tastes. Sweet potatoes are in season, and the finger sized variety that I’ve snootily decided to call Beauregard (this resolution came after staring at countless potato images for hours– note to self: ask farmer in the future). Anyways, they are quaintly sized and totally delicious. Usually people avoid the whole cooking-sweet potatoes-athome business because they’re so damn hard to peel and cook thoroughly. Not the case with these babies– they’re small enough to cook evenly after a relatively short amount of time, and mash effortlessly, skin and all. The flavour of these potatoes is sweet and buttery, perfect for those rainy nights to come. The sausage adds that desired savory smokiness, and the cheese acts as the perfect ooey gooey glue for the tortilla. Nom. ingredients: 2-3 finger sized sweet potatoes (by finger I mean the size of a giants) 1 tortilla handful of chorizo or Italian sausage (any meat really that’s been
pre cooked) handful of shredded cheddar cheese salt pepper oil Set the oven to 325 F and place your washed, aluminum foil wrapped sweet potatoes into the oven for forty minutes. I just placed them on the bottom rack of my oven. Carefully peel the foil off the sweet potatoes (they’re really hot so take your time!) and drop them in a medium sized bowl.
Add in an inch of butter and mash with a fork. I like to leave the skin on for extra fiber and nutrients. Add a pinch of salt and pepper. Take this sweet potato spread and smear it over one side of your tortilla (that’s already laying in a pan.) Take the diced chorizo and sprinkle it on top, followed by the cheese and fold the tortilla in half. Place on the top rack of your oven for 10 minutes until the tortilla is crispy and your cheese is melted. Cut in half and enjoy!
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with your current experience, reexamine your habits. I truly admire an athlete’s conviction, as they embody selfdiscipline in its truest colour. But most people struggle with their day to day practice of habits. If you are one of them, and this article has found you in your escape into procrastination, fear no more. You can change and form new habits, just give yourself an allowance of 21 days of patience, resilience and perseverance. Whether you want to practice controlled spending, efficient study habits, a healthier lifestyle, or learn and explore a new talent, you will find yourself well on the way to becoming a changed person. Just take a personal challenge and commit yourself to 21 days of self-discovery! I can’t recount how many times I have tried to stick to a daily study routine. My main frustration was that I attacked my initial planning stage with vigour and then gave up too soon because I didn’t see instant results. That’s where most people are at fault. When bad habits die hard, you have to practice patience, and accept that you will fall a few times before you stand victorious. Any personal breakthrough is usually preceded by a personal breakdown. Positive affirmations are a useful tool to keep you mentally stimulated through this process. Practice them daily, along with the power of gratitude to keep you mentally empowered. When you really think about it, 21 days of sacrifice for a long-term reward is a minimal trade-off to say the least. Remind yourself that you reap what you sow, and that momentary restraint allows for long-term success. Here’s a breakdown to make the transition a smooth one. First, write down your intentions. It is important to identify why you want to accomplish and master this habit. The greater your conviction, the easier it will be for you to stand by the change. Next, practice total honesty with yourself and celebrate each step, regardless of how irrelevant it may seem. Make sure to stay clear of negative people. There will be people who unintentionally may act as a trigger to your downfall. Ultimately, constantly remind yourself, as Aristotle did himself, that we are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit. Mastering yourself is true power.
The 21-day challenge
How to conquer yourself and attain self-discipline
Bad habits die hard, and good habits seem impossible to form. As per Plato, “the first and best victory is to conquer self.” If there is one thing my university experience has consistently taught me, it is that discipline is the most valuable habit a human mind can form. Talent, drive and determination fall short in discipline’s absence. Self-discipline is a channel through which one attains success, triumph and true accomplishment. Habits and self-discipline are two edges of the same sword. You cannot establish one without the other. As a critical part of our life, habits nurture our goals, and help us stay focused along the path of accomplishment. Concurrently, non-supportive habits act as obstacles from moving forward and hurt our well-being. Research has proven that it takes 21 days to form a habit, and therefore break one too. So, amidst a second round of upcoming midterms, innumerable other deadlines, and a terrifying MasterCard bill to face, I’ve challenged myself to practice and indulge in 21 days of thorough self-discipline. It’s time for a re-evaluation of my current routine, and a much needed intervention and introduction of daily rituals. Anything you practice with repetition and emotion will become your reality. If you’re not satisfied
using your summer job to help your future career
Allison is one of our clients, who is coming in for a meeting today after doing a lot of thinking about “who she is” and how she wants to steer her career. I was expecting to help her finalize that decision, but she came with a more distressing problem. The call centre where she worked last summer is closing and she won’t be able to work there this summer. She was surprised when I told her that losing that opportunity might just be a gift in disguise. Allison immediately needed to call her former boss before the company closes, to empathize with him about the closing, and to ask if she could use him as a reference for her summer job search. Somehow she will need to gather contact information where a potential employer could reach him even after the firm closes its doors. It sounds kind of harsh to ask for this of someone who is losing his job, but he might just feel honoured that his reference means that much to her. At the same time, maybe he has landed another job where he could be helpful to her. So then she wanted to know why it might be a gift. I explained how important summer jobs can be when she finishes school and begins searching for her first career job. Now that she is on the road to having her career paths a little more defined, her next two summer jobs could become wonderful opportunities to learn more about her career destination zone. The right summer job will give her plenty of opportunity to become friends with all kinds of people who may be really helpful in identifying job opportunities at a later time. The information she learns on the job will also help her to tailor her course projects and/or volunteer work in a direction that would show her interest in the field. If the industry is right for her, it is a powerful way to show employers after she graduates that she is interested and ready to work for their field. I asked Allison what advice she would give a school friend, if her friend was looking for a summer job. Allison thoughts on the topic just streamed out almost faster than I could write them down. “Once she knows the area that she wants to pursue, she should get on line and check all the summer job boards that she can find to see what kind of jobs are listed there. Then if I were her, I would start listing all my friends and their parents’ friends and of course, my parents’ friends, who might work in that kind of industry. I would contact them and see if they are aware of any jobs or people in the industry, that I could contact using their name. I would research each suggested contact and then compose an email to each of them, consisting of a few lines which mention the referral’s name in the introduction, my pertinent strengths and my keen career interest in finding a summer job in this area. It would ask them if they could give me any suggestions for how I could get a start in their field with a summer job. I would also ask them for contacts that would help me in my search. I would follow up those emails with phone calls and then follow up on every lead. I would just keep hammering at it until I found an opening. But before doing any of that I would clean up my Facebook and other on line sites and get myself properly set up on LinkedIn.” Allison was talking so fast that I could hardly keep up with writing down all of her ideas when she added “I would go through all my resume wherever possible. Somecontacts on my email address book times employers get approved for and send a similar individual email hiring a summer student before to selected people.” they have a student in mind. Then I pointed out that she just cre- their time crunch might increase ated her own advice. What she her chances of landing a summer described is exactly the strategy position. She is also going to talk she should follow! to a friend of her boyfriend who Allison is right. She is better to has his own website. She is going put her time into this kind of net- to see if the time in setting up her working than into blitzing a job own website would be worth the area with generic resumes. At the benefit. If she can do a professional same time, she could put that time looking site, it makes a powerful saved into producing a master re- impression on an employer but it sume. This is a resume that never can be of detriment, if it does not leaves her computer, but it has all reflect her strengths or if it has erher jobs and volunteer positions rors in grammar and style. on it with all the accurate dates, in We also talked about the need for the right format. Under each job Allison to read the local and nationshe should list the strongest ac- al news every day, so that she will complishments or innovations that be better able to handle introducshe achieved (60 per cent of her tory conversation in the interview, list) in the job and the major re- but also because she may be able sponsibilities (40 per cent of her to predict potential opportunities list). She won’t send this resume before others see them. Looking for work is a challenge to anyone, but she will keep it to use when she carefully tailors every resume to the job she discovers in her networking. Her cover letter should be brief and state exactly how she fits the position “like a glove” with each statement backed up by achievements and responsibilities listed in her resume. When her friends proofread the letters, they should first tell her if they immediately see how she fits just from skimming the cover letter and resume. It is important to remember that the employer is going to be going through a couple of hundred good resumes and her “fit” needs to be apparent without any work or interpretation. Allison is going to prepare a more concise professional resume that generally positions her well for the area she is pursuing, but also highlights her leadership skills. She going to subscribe to online job sites and submit her professional and can get discouraging. Its important to maintain a positive outlook throughout the process. I asked Allison to start writing, every evening before she goes to bed, three meaningful things that happened to her to her that day ( no matter how small they might be) and why they were meaningful. The habit will become almost addictive and will keep her strong through her job search and her career. Allison says she also has an idea for a summer business and so she is also going off to her school’s career centre to see if they know about grants and the process for following up on that lead. If it is too late for this year, it will be a great idea to start planning for next summer. The key to landing a summer position is to stay strong and have three or more target areas each with their respective plan and set of contacts to explore.
1 6 7 . 8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
why we look away
When confronted with horrible things, we cover our eyes so we can’t see; cover our ears so we can’t hear; and cover our mouths so we can’t scream. It’s human nature. Consider the Syrian government’s crackdown on rebels and protestors. The government led by President Assad is committing terrible crimes against the Syrian people with no mercy shown towards civilians and children. Yet many people in Canada are unaware of the extent of the atrocities. The conflict shows up in headlines, but a lot of people I know don’t read any farther than that. The Syrian conflict is not just another Arab Spring uprising, and it is not discussed as much as it should be. One explanation given for this wilful blindness is that the sheer horror of violence is too much for us, that it repulses us so that we are unable to read the papers or watch the news. We skim over world news because it’s too harrowing to read of torture and murder. The counterpoint to this argument is that we are immersed in violence everyday; we crave a good bloodbath. Our appetite for fictional violence is increasing: a 2007 Scientific American article stated that the average American child will have seen 8000 murIt’s not pretty: the Assad reders on TV by the time he or she gime is killing Syrian rebels and starts elementary school. The civilians more or less indiscrimimost mainstream movies and nately. Human Rights Watch has books contain scenes of brutal reports of children as young as 13 and sadistic violence, and we being raped, tortured and killed. enjoy it. I don’t think of myself as The prisons are overcrowded and a depraved person – but I’m ex- unsanitary, and prisoners are cited for the release of the Hunger given spoiled food. People who Games movie, in which children are able to escape the country fight each other to the death. are fleeing to neighbouring LebAnother reason for our seeming anon. In Homs, the initial centre apathy is that we feel unable to of the uprising, activists are being help. Although we care, there’s a rounded up and executed. The Guardian, a British newsdisconnect between what we feel and what we do. However, feel- paper, interviewed journalist ings of powerlessness should not Paul Conroy after he was injured prevent us from knowing what is by shrapnel and smuggled out happening. Even if we cannot act, of Syria. we can at least bear witness. We “I don’t know how we can may not be able to shape foreign stand by and watch this,” he said. policy or create sanctions, but “It’s not a war, it’s a massacre.” we can let tyrants know that we “We are going to have the shame are watching; we can show the of sitting back and watching it oppressed that we stand in soli- once again,” he continued. “As darity with them. in Srebrenica, as in Rwanda. It’s Then there’s the point that it’s not too late, but it needs someone too depressing to think about the to step up to the mark. Otherissue. Most people have a slew wise, forget it, we are going to of problems in their own lives, be talking about a massacre beand we’re constantly bombarded yond measure.” We need to fight our tendency with stories about what is wrong with the world. At the end of a to look away in the face of this long day, sometimes I just want conflict. We need to keep our eyes to make a cup of tea and watch open so the Assad regime knows The Bachelor on TV. I don’t want that the world is watching. We to hear about atrocities. It’s hard need to uncover our ears so that to face the ugly side of humanity, we know what is happening. And but it’s our duty as human be- we need to scream. ings to know what’s happening.
who you are
My name is Carleigh Cathcart. My hair, nails and eyelashes are real. I’ve never worn Abercrombie & Fitch in my life. I couldn’t tell you the difference between eyeliner and mascara. I strive to be a model citizen, not a model. And I’m not changing any time soon. Let me make one thing clear: I do not care if you wear popular clothing labels. I do not care how much make-up you use everyday. I do not care if you dye your hair, paint your nails or curl your eyelashes. What I do have an issue with is when you look down upon those who don’t conform to your standards. Who are you to decide what is acceptable? Who are you to judge others based on the first level of appearance? There is no normal. In a world with billions of people, there simply cannot be one accepted standard, a certain criteria of habits, style and behaviour. Some people drink, some people do not. Some play hockey, others prefer chess. We all know these differences exist, and we all know they will continue to find troubling. People really are exist for as long as mankind re- “geeky,” act “slutty,” and love mains on this planet. Yet, we seem sports. I, myself, depending on to fight the notion of diversity; my clothes, poetry or morals, always observing our peers and could be described as a nerd, emo, mimicking their fashions and ac- or goody-two-shoes. Truthfully, tions. We are forever controlled these descriptions are fairly accuby a social script written for us rate. The problem comes when we by our peers, one where stray- use these designations to evaluate ing from your correct dialogue our “approval” of others. or stage movement comes with Greg is not hurting anyone a social rebuke or ostracizing because he loves fixing computconsequence. ers. Amanda can play on 5 sports Clichés abound. “Geek,” teams and still have a great per“nerd,” “jock,” “emo.” “Drug- sonality. Alicia may not like gie,” “slut,” “whore.” And that’s drinking alcohol, but that doesn’t just in middle school. Why? Why make her a brown-nosing loser. do we care what other people If you really don’t like someone, wear, do and say? Can’t we just you don’t like them. No point be ourselves? making a big deal of hating them The answer, of course, is no. It or viewing yourself as superior is obviously not that simple. I will - it just makes for an exhaustbe the first to admit that I have ing, perpetual competition. And used many of the above labels to frankly, none of us need that. describe people in the past. And Apples are apples, and oranghonestly, you know you have as es are oranges. You can like one, well. There’s no point in any of us both, or neither. But at the end pretending we’re exempted from of the day, they are two colourthe disservice of name-calling. ful foods that contribute to the Perhaps it is best for me to impressive vibrancy of a fresh put it in this perspective: it is fruit bowl. not the use of stereotypes that I
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other crucial factors. Although a moment for self reflection and with music by Noah Gundersen, the statistics for those affect- even taking a deep breath once followed by a conversation led ed by mental health challenges in a while. by To Write Love On Her Arms may seem overwhelming, there Eve Lampert, another member founder Jamie Tworkowski on are many initiatives that can be of the 1 in 5 committee, empha- issues including self injury. One taken to assist with such chal- sized education as being a very of the event coordinators, Ian lenges. Shannon Stach said that important aspect of confronting Sinclair, describes these two the biggest preventative measure the stigmas around mental health. events as being “the book ends is early intervention. She also ex- The members of the 1 in 5 cam- of March” to raise awareness of pressed the need for people to paign have been busy developing mental health challenges. increase self awareness, promote events that will tackle stigmas On top of these initiatives to self care and create healthy cop- and promote awareness. In hon- promote awareness of mental ing mechanisms. our of Mental Health Awareness health, many resources exist on In terms of student life, it is day on Thursday Mar. 8, there and off campus to provide peoeasy to see how mental health will be a panel discussion held ple with support. These services challenges can emerge with such in Rozanski 103 at 5:30pm. The include: Counselling Services tedious and stressful workloads panel is comprised of students through the University of Guelph, and a tense environment. Stach that have experienced a mental Student Support Network, The urges students to “do whatever health challenge, a psychiatrist, Wellness Centre, Trellis and your passion is for an hour a day.” and Eric Windeler, founder of The Homewood Health Centre. No matter how high the stack Furthermore, 1 in 5 committee Jack Project at Kids Help Phone. member Brittany Moor conveyed Another unique and informa- of library books or how few hours that students often put time for tive event taking place in light of are left until your exam, take self care on the back burner. It is mental health awareness is being time for self reflection and for a as simple as not eating lunch at held on Mar. 25 at War Memo- much-needed deep breath. your desk while working, taking rial Hall. This event will begin
fire away: Breaking down the stigmas of mental health challenges
In April 2007, I lost a dear friend that suffered with mental health challenges for a large portion of her life. This experience, alongside many other glimpses into the rising concerns of mental health, opened my eyes to the prevalence of such difficulties as well as the unfortunate stigmas that surround them. In honour of Mental Health Awareness day on Mar. 8, I hope to shed light on some of these concerns that are affecting so many people around us. The current stigma around mental health challenges is prevalent as many people are uncomfortable discussing what is going on inside their heads. It seems that most people will openly discuss physical ailments, but a majority are not confident in addressing mental health concerns. Shannon Stach of the 1 in 5 committee stated that “as much as you have a broken leg and need to put a cast on it… with mental health you also need proper support.” The 1 in 5 initiative estimated that 4500 students on the University of Guelph campus are affected by a mental health challenge. This imperative group on campus developed its name from the Canadian Mental Health Association’s statistic stating that 1 in 5 Canadians will be affected by a mental health challenge in any given year. Members of the 1 in 5 committee addressed the many factors contributing to mental health challenges. There are a wide range of aspects including genetics, life experiences, environment, personal relationships, family environment, support (or lack thereof), and many
The Bropocalypse is a cataclysmic epidemic that has viciously poisoned and destroyed integral parts of Western humanity. It came without any warning from the Mayans and spread faster than the Spanish Flu. Most of you already know what Bro’s are, but for those who don’t look no further than the stereotypical party personalities present at almost every social gathering. They’re the guy’s whose only gear is alpha male sexual predator. The ones who are well versed in how much they drank and how many girls they’ve slept with, but are completely impotent in every other avenue of conversation. I had been aware for a long time that the Bros live among us; I had seen them during the day walking half-dead in their hangover paralysis. Petrified, I observed their attempts to suckle all the good out of this world. Yet, only reThe Bros baptized me into their cently did I realize the extent to ranks with a funnel of cheap beer. which their infection had spread. Funnel after funnel I drank that This awareness washed over me beer until it tasted like dirty water. when I awoke in the darkness to When I finished they yelled my the hum of a misogynistic drone. name, celebrated my alcoholic deSlowly, the sound became louder bauchery and chanted that I was a and louder until finally I looked legend. I became an exalted vacuout my window to see the horde ous slob. I became a Bro. that is Bro culture beckoning at Once the Bropocalypse demy chamber door. stroyed my humanity, life became From that day forward, I did so easy. With the help of severe everything in my power to re- intoxication, my existential and sist the onslaught of the Bromidic metaphysical quandaries evaphorde. I even took the precaution orated into hollow pleasure of pouring ammonium outside my pursuits. My role models stopped home to throw them off my scent being Billy Corrigan and Chris(Bro’s constantly piss and defecate topher Hedges and started being on each other, so this is a good the Jersey Shore cast. The Jersey practice for blending in). Howev- Shore is MTV’s most viewed T.V. er, over the slow decay of time my telecast series ever and the show’s defences eventually broke down and the Bros devoured me like savage dogs—in the end cat piss only attracted them. Yes, my dear reader, I confess that up until this point I have mislead you. There was a time when I was the monster that today I renounce. superficial slogan GTL (gym, tan, laundry) became the Bro religion that I followed faithfully. Onward I walked with Bro ideology in my heart, but I was not the only one. Enrique Iglesias, arguably the world’s most romantic man, the one who promised to “be your hero baby … to take away the pain” forsook his loving heart. I suspect that he was corrupted by Pitbull—the bald pervert Bro who fills the role of the boogey man in all of our nightmares– but I can’t be sure. Together Enrique and Pitbull released “I Like It,” a song devoid of passion that features the entire Jersey Shore cast. While the song had all of Enrique’s usual production value it lacked his relevance and heart. As a result, the song was dumped into the landfill that houses all the other forgotten pop music pornography. The Bropocalypse transformed Enrique from a beacon of love to a proponent of Bro culture. Fortunately, even with Enrique succumbing to the Bro fever, in 2011 the Bropocalypse started slowing down. You see, the Bro mentality is so devoid of substance that in order to function it must constantly subsume new people into its apparatus of control. Human beings, by their very nature, can only handle a meaningless perspective for so long before they start to question it. In order to compensate for this flaw, new Bros are constantly recruited, so that old Bros can feed off their enthusiasm and put their doubts to rest. New Bros then climb this hierarchal Bro ladder, as they attempt to transcend reality and become some
“Funnel after funnel i drank that beer until it tasted like dirty water. when i finished they yelled my name, celebrated my alcoholic debauchery and chanted that i was a legend.”
sort of super Bro, which of course Although I can’t speak for human does not exist. In 2011, however, beings, I know that last year while the Bropyramid started crash- he went on his holy “winning” ing down. There were too many crusade, the Bros watched every Bros at the top and not enough at moment. When Charlie did all the bottom. those drugs, drank all that alcohol I know the Bropocalypse and slept with all those women, scourge is slowing down be- he became the super Bro we had cause I have just recently looked all longed for. We watched in ecat the Jersey Shore ratings and– stasy as he stumbled through one thank God– they are in decline. controversy to the next speaking Ever since the finale of season about his transcendence to the four their viewership has been Bropocalyptic Promised Land and slipping along with their gener- the endless pleasure that awaital appearances. Jersey Shore, the ed those who followed him. But engine of Bro culture, is losing its then shockingly, Charlie’s path ability to pump gas and spread to greatness stopped at a custoBrosyphilis. dy battle where he lost his kids. For me, however, it wasn’t JerWith that, my twisted dark sey Shore’s decline that rescued Bro fantasy came to an end and me from the vacuum of the Bro- I awoke disoriented: from a terpocalypse—it was Charlie Sheen. rible empty dream.
With summer sublets hard to come by, sticking around in Guelph seems like the simplest solution to the summer rent issue, but with all the students staying back it can be difficult to find work, especially in your area of study. The competition for summer employment on-campus is especially fierce but the experience is rewarding. Once you finally make your way through the labyrinth that is the University of Guelph website and find the hidden cache of job postings, the next step is drafting your resume. Coop and Career Services offers some great workshops on resume and cover letter writing and are available by appointment for mock interviews and to review your resume with you. The real employment gems are the research assistant positions, but require a little more digging– unless you know where to look. The catch is that once you find them, you still have to apply for Financial Need or Work Study. And that’s where things get ugly. “You’re not poor enough to work here” is the response many students get in response to their application (though not quite in those words). Even if you’re $16,000 in debt, you have a sibling (or multiple) at university, your parents are about to retire, halving their income each yea or any number of other mitigating factors which could affect your finances, you might get denied. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t work somewhere else,” is a response that often follows to students who are turned down. There are few on-campus opportunities that accept students who do not qualify. The Financial Need Assessment forms do not take into consideration your own personal student debt, nor does it take into consideration that some students may be choosing to support themselves through university through other means of employment rather than relying on student loans. Even if you choose not to accept OSAP because you would rather learn valuable lessons about managing your own finances than owe the government money– and kudos to you if you pull it off– if you can technically receive financial support through OSAP, you may be denied Work Study approval since those other options are available, even if those options saddle you with debt. So what’s all that about? The Financial Need Assessment form looks only at your parents’ income. But here’s the real kicker, it looks at their income before taxes. You can appeal the verdict, but the logic they seem to follow behind those Student Financial Services desks is this: if you’re parents make X amount of money (and they don’t have “crazy credit card debt”) then they should be able to fund your education. The end. So if you’re working 40 hours a week on top of a full course load to pay for school, you’ll get nothing but a pat on the back. Rather, they might look at your employment as another reason not to approve your application, because obviously you don’t have any expenses other than paying tuition. The standards for the Financial Need Assessment form need to either be released so we can all see what these results are based on, or else the system needs to be overhauled to consider that students are no longer solely dependent on their parents, and that some students are choosing to pay for their own education. It seems fair to have resources available to supplement the income of students who are struggling a great deal
1 6 7 . 8 ◆ march 8t h – 14t h, 2012
The flaws of financial need assessments and work study
financially, but what student isn’t struggling? Saying that all jobs should be based on qualification for financial need alone ignores the merits and qualifications of each student, closing rather than opening doors to students who wish to stay in Guelph over the summer or who want to gain a more valuable summer work experience. Many students also look to use their summer job opportunities to find work in their field of study to help them find a career once they graduate and in many instances in Guelph these kinds of jobs are only available through the university. When these positions, namely research based positions, are based solely on financial need it does a disservice to academically outstanding students who would benefit from and contribute to research in these types of positions, positions which they won’t be able to find elsewhere. As previously stated, the criteria for Work Study and Financial Need should either be made available to students or revised to consider financially independent students if Financial Services wants to continue serving the best interest of students.
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36. Fast food ruler of England? 40. inquire 41. Lubricates 42. Microsoft program 43. Academy of European Medieval Martial Arts 45. Airway disease 46. Molten rock 48. gore and Capone 49. “Ouch!” 50. Australian panties? 54. Et ___ 55. Leg bone 56. radiate 59. grandmothers (slang) 60. Madagascar lake 61. dash 62. Longing 63. goddess of agriculture 64. Singles 22. Seabird 23. tiny organism 24. Mature compost 28. Large 29. “behold!” 30. Years and years 32. graze 33. will Ferrell movie 34. AKA, dJ Premier 35. Municipal rule 37. Chivalrous 38. 1946 Literature nobelist 39. Office no. 43. realise 44. Ostrich cousin 45. Constantly 46. back tooth 47. Amazing 48. get up 50. irish goddess 51. Make ready 52. bar above bookshelf 53. bubbly chocolate bar 57. rocks, to a bartender 58. French possessive
Last week's Solution
created By sean and kate
1. Electronic book 5. Appliance maker 10. Monopoly square 14. diabolical 15. deprive of gender 16. First Lady of Jazz 17. bloodshed 18. Suave pl. 19. wander
20. Scientologist’s luxury liner? 23. “Help!” 25. Soccer chant 26. tire pattern 27. Mutter 29. Streaky 31. inbox contents 32. Procrastinator’s promise 33. Police alert, for short
1. it’s tapped 2. Lacto-___ 3. Skin irregularity 4. Margarine 5. tissue 6. Habituate 7. Son of isaac 8. First name in jeans 9. Alive 10. ___ Shore 11. Luau greeting 12. “Since ___ Eyes On You” (2) 13. Light source 21. Pepper tree
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andrew whitefield frank sPum
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check out the all day event in the UC courtyard. Pick up a t-shirt for the SAFE week t-shirt campaign from the The Wellness Centre, J.T. Powell Bldng, 2nd floor, Mar 12-14, 8:30am-4:30pm. Guelph Lecture in Philosophy. Everyone Welcome. Harvard Professor Thomas (Tim) Scanlon will speak on ‘What is morality?’ 5:30pm-7pm. Academic Public Square, McLaughlin Library, U of G. Guelph Field Naturalists indoor meeting: 7:30pm at the Arboretum Centre. All welcome. ‘The Wonderful World Of Fossils’- Bob O’Donnell, shares his knowledge of Fossils around Canada. Fossils will be on display. saturday march 9 Guelph Contra Dances holds its monthly contra dance 8-10:30pm at St. James Anglican Church (corner of Glasgow/Paisley Rd). Free parking. Special guest caller Tara Bolker, band Relative Harmony. Admission is $10/$8 members and students. Info call: Rick Avery at 519-763-2494.
saturday march 10 Guelph Hiking Trial Club Hike: Snyder’s Flat, Bloomingdale 7 km. Level 1. Speed Moderate. Meet at Canadian Tire on Woodlawn for 10am departure and car pool to hike start point. Some muddy spots Bring water, no pets. All welcome. Leader: Terry (519) 265-6203. www.guelphhiking. com Guelph Cultural Arts Festival: a one day arts festival to foster and showcase creative writing, music, theatre, performance and other cultural arts in Guelph. Free and open to public. Info and registration: www.guelphculturalarts. com wednesday march 14 Decreasing Headaches program begins at 7:30 pm. More than 2 or 3 headaches a month are too many! This 4 session program teaches drug-free strategies that decrease tension and migraine headaches. Fee $20. Details at www.uoguelph.ca/~ksomers. Thursday march 15 Guelph Civic Museum Military History Lecture Series. This month: Matt Symes speaks on War in the Abstract: Art as a Window into Canada’s Military Past. 7:30 pm at the new Guelph Civic Museum. Doors open 6:30pm. Free admission. 52 Norfolk St. Contact: 519-836-1221 x2775. ongoing: Milk bags for Mat-making! Meal Exchange is making bed mats out of Milk bags! The bed mats are used in third world countries. email email@example.com to participate in the event or arrange a pickup time,or bring bags to UC room 241. Deadline- March 9th Thursday At Noon Concert Series. ♫♫ “celebrating over 40 years of music making” ♫♫. Concerts start at 12:00p.m. Thursdays in Mackinnon room 107 (Goldschmidt room). Admission free – donations gratefully appreciated. Everyone welcome! Trillium Gift of Life Network (TGLN) is encouraging all Ontarians to register their consent to become organ and tissue donors. By registering as a donor, you could one day save up to eight lives and enhance as many as 75 more. Online donor registration is now available at BeADonor.ca. It’s easy and it only takes 3 minutes to register. www.beadonor.ca
Thursday march 8 In celebration of International Women’s Day, come out for an evening of celebration, solidarity & awareness of women through dance, music, film & poetry. ‘Women’s Voices’ 7pm at John F.Ross, E.L. Fox Auditorium. Tickets $15/door. Reception after the show. Brought to you by Guelph Fab5. SAFE Week, an annual initiative to raise awareness of sexual assault and the importance of consent and respectful relationships. Come
community events Student of Colour Support Groups (and Students from Different Cultural Backgrounds). Mondays: One on One support 10am-2pm, Discussion 3-5pm. Tuesdays: One on One support 10am-2pm. Discussion group 2-3pm. Wed: One on one support 10am-2pm. Discussion group 5-7pm. Confidentiality ensured. Munford Centre, Rm 54. Contact: firstname.lastname@example.org or x53244. services Editing Specialists! Research and Editing Experts At Your Service. All levels, all subjects. Post-graduates in most fields available to help you get the job done right! 1-888-345-8295 www.customessay.com volunteer oPPortunities Save a life...or 3! Canadian Blood Services is looking for donors at the University of Guelph. Clinic held in PCH March 23 from 10am-3:30pm.
Under University student plan, co-payment has been waived. Dentistry Asleep. FREE CUSTOM TEETH WHITENING! Invisalign from $1900!