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A Speech for American Monsters
By: Timothy R. Waggener
Wake up America
I'm going to teach you the Ageless Secret to why you are poor, and how to be rich again!
This is groundbreaking "Old School" news we have forgotten. America does not make money off of oil. America does not make money off of war.� American does not make money off of Politics. America uses these things to make money, but there is one thing we are always doing when we're one of the richest kids on the block. We are being the most awesome, coolest, kick ass, movie star styled people on the damned planet. Here's the secret... Love buys money, not the other way around. Who pays $20 for a Mcdonalds hamburger? Everyone who loves us. Why? It ain't just because it's the cleanest d-mn FCC standard meat you can buy. It ain't because it's tastey. It ain't because it gets ya high. It's because America eats Mcdonalds, and Mcdonalds saves kids. Charity means love, and love means money. Get in the game. Who pays $80 for a mickey mouse doll? Everyone who loves us. Why? It ain't just because mickey looks nice. It ain't just because mickey is a collectible. It ain't just because mickey is made of high quality plastic. It's because America makes movies, and kids love mickey mouse. Who pays $30 to see an American movie that is two years old? Everyone who loves us. Why? It ain't because the movie is new. It ain't because the movie is popular. It ain't just because the movie is fun. It's because the movie tells us what America is, and everyone wants to be like us. Where do these profits still roll in? Every place that still loves us! Africa loves us. Why? It ain't because we kick their ass. It ain't because we kiss their ass, and it ain't because we teach 'em how to tap anyone's ass. It's because we fight terrorists in Africa with food, with money, and with troops. And guess what? In Africa we are winning. So while we're winning, why the
f-ck is there not more Mcdonalds, Mickey Mouse, and DVDs in Africa? People who hate you don't idolize you. People love you for what you are, and when they love you they will SPEND SPEND SPEND to understand and enjoy and bask in the awesomeness of your glory, and idolize you, and be like you. So why are we loosing money? 'cause we're loosing tha love. That's right, you can't buy love, but love makes you rich. This has always been the American way, and we're quickly forgetting it. I've recently watched another show that is set out to destroy America. "Charm School." This crappy show is where spoiled American movie star bitches try to learn how to show some class in Britain. This show sells in America, but it's killing us in Britain. The ONE and ONLY reason Britain (and not hardly anyone else, except those who loved us) supported us in invading Iraq, is 'cause we make 'em rich. Britain loves money, and we're almost out, so what else are we loved for? Dirty Harry is an old movie. It still sells. The Punisher is an old movie. People still buy it. The older cartoons, the old American way, it still sells. We still make money, and people still buy it. South Korea still idolizes us, and that pisses North Korea off. Kim Jong wants to be a movie star, so he does what we do. He grabs up nukes, and shoots for the ocean to prove he can make Tsuandies in Japan, 'cause hey, we were launching nukes in Japan once, and back then people loved us. But he goes to Disney Land, pretending kids love him. He goes online, pretending people love him. He gets the tackiest, lamest shades in the world, and still gets no respect. Why? Because he is a god damned looser. Kim Jong two ain't an American Hero, he's a God Damned TERROR-PIMP! Nobody loves him, and nobody listens to him. He can imitate is all day, but he's still an evil bitch! He enslaves children, and citizens of South Korea, and they die at the Military's hand. Kim Jong is called "God" according to his personality cult. It is a trait he inherited from His father, the proceeding God. Jong's efforts to be a God based on his personality have failed. He can't get one damned LIVE nuke launched, because of earth quakes destroying his nuclear base. Why? 'cause Africa is showing the love. You're God damned right they are. You can thank Africa, and all the love in money, troops, and food for the fact California is still standing ABOVE the water, and you can quote me on that. Love conquers everything. When people love you they show support. You want to pass gay marriage? Don't parade around in public naked, or half dressed, looking like total whores and committing sex offenses exposing yourself to all passerbyers, children included. The reason gay marriage failed in California has nothing to do with gays. It has to do with whores, and when all gay people are associated with whore parades, nobody wants you exposing your privates to kids, and everyone worries about the kids and what you're teaching them. You want to make money? Do what every marketing firm does. Sell your damned image to people. America was rich, not from the American Economy, but from the world economy. Stop pumping money into failed commercialism, and tell companies to fund other Countries. Not making money in the states? It's a loosing battle. Why the f-ck outsource? Save a village in
Africa, and when it prospers, you can SELL your tampons to the young ladies so they can attend school, you can SELL birth control, you can SELL aids prevention, but first you gotta prove you give a f-ck about people who just want some support, so give some sh-t away, stop the overpopulating, and people will stop killing each other. Then when they get better, they'll want more. If they CAN afford it, sell it. If they can't show them you give a d-mn. Americans can only f-ck like animals so long, so birth control can be used for something good, and so can stopping diseases. You want "Market Research?" Hit Youtube. It's already free! Consider it an investment, in not only profit, but also in love. Do that, and nobody NEEDS the NWO, the Illuminate, or even massive war and genocide! Why let the Government have all the fun? Pump your corporate money into love. Be a hero to someone nobody else gives a sh-t about. This is a New War out there, and it's all about reputation. You want to fix the American Economy? Support someone nobody is supporting. Show them you care. Feed them money, and stick your brand name on the screen, and make sure it's relevant to something they care about. Make sure it's something they want or need to buy, because it reminds them you're their god damned hero! Everyone loves a hand out. Call me a Politican, but it makes the world a better place, and it's something you really CAN'T feel guilty for making money off of. Just remember, the LOVE keeps the money coming, so UNDER-Price, take the extra profits, and care about the LOVE not the money, because the constant love and discounts is what keeps everything rolling, so it works out for everyone, and your pockets will be more than deep enough as long as you keep the ball in THEIR court. So don't GAMBLE on a high price. Stick with what always works. Stick with love, and for God's sake, say Hi in person. You might actually have something to live for, and keep the money too! Wake up in the morning and remember those bright eyed smiling children. Remember the hugs from the beaten, the outcast, the "damned." Remember you were a hero to someone who loves you more than anyone else in the world, and they literally BEG you to take their money, and suddenly you'll understand why life is WORTH living! When people love what you are, they throw out money to be like you. Nobody is impressed by whores on TV in "Charm School" making fools of themselves. You want to sell International Film, you want to be a hit at $30 a ticket? Well, damn, make it marketable to people. Throw some heroes in there. You want to be loved? Make money off it. That is, and always has been, the American way. Why the hell should the Government have to do everything? Show some love, get some love. Go there in person. Not to get on film, just to enjoy it. Cry for the children in your free time, and smile for the camera when you're over it. All the sudden it's not about the money, it's about the love, and once you realize that you're richer than you were before anyway. NOTHING has been lost, and love has been gained! You want people to respect the Military? Save someone everyone cares about. Children are less than $10 a dozen, and less than $4 by the hundred. People who buy children don't care about love. They want raw sex, soldiers, and labour. Getting called a monster from Iraq? Turn that shit around. Show
what a monster can do. Blow the shit out of these child laundering terror-pimps, and leave a trail of blood where people sing SONGS in your glory, and know what it feels like to be ancient Greek Gods, or in normal talk, a TRUE American Hero!!! Kill something nobody loves. Get the kids some homes. There's some immigrants everyone wants in their Country. There's the Statue of LIBERTY and JUSTICE for ALL the downtroden! You want to fix the economy, it doesn't matter if you're a business or a solider. Sell your-SELF for what and who you REALLY are! That's what gets love. And that's what gets money. That is all.
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