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warrior confidence

ACTION B COURAGE AND SRENGHT CONIDENCE DISCIPLINE do with the fervency of prayer and the discipline of a martial art.

The main themes of this site are:

Truth: Accept reality and rid your life of falsehood and denial Love: Improve your ability to connect with yourself and others Power: Build your motivation and discipline to create the life you desire Oneness: Stop fighting against resistance, and make the world your ally Authority: Take command of your life, and learn to make clear decisions Courage: Summon the inner strength to take action in spite of fear Intelligence: Live authentically, and express your genuine creativity

The areas of your life this site will help you improve include:

Habits: Create a daily routine that gives you a sense of flow Career: Build a career you're truly passionate about Money: Achieve financial abundance without compromising your integrity Health: Adopt health habits that empower your physical body Relationships: Enjoy loving relationships that help you grow Spirituality: Raise your awareness and live more consciously

Anais Nin that goes like thisAnd the time came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom. After reading that, I burst into tears and so began my journey of transformation.

Posted October 21st, 2010 at 9:54AM

By: kungfuchic Age: 46-50, Woman

What's Your Story? Share It Here I thought this might hit home for some still struggling. Sometimes it's the simplist of things that makes us go, Oh yeah!

Content What is intimacy in a relationship?

How can you recognize intimacy in a relationship? Obstacles to establishing intimacy in a relationship Beliefs which prevent establishing intimacy Behavior traits needed to handle healthy intimacy in a relationship Steps to improve intimacy in a relationship. What is intimacy in a relationship? Intimacy with another person is the: * Unmasking of yourself in order to make yourself vulnerable in a trusting, loving, secure relationship. * Sense that you have a special, unique and distinct bond joining you and another person. * Sense of closeness, proximity and being "in tight." * Sense of oneness, unity and uniqueness. * Sense of being exposed, undefended and fragile. * Sharing of tenderness, caring and affection. * Sharing of secrets, hidden tales and private thoughts. * Free will offering and receiving of each others' generosity, giving and sharing. * Sense of being in a non-punitive, non-abusive and non-coercive environment. * Mutual respect, recognition and approval of each other's need to be a sexual being. In a marital relationship, this shared sexuality ultimately results in loving sexual intercourse. How can you recognize intimacy in a relationship? The following ten statements describe intimate relationships: 1. Continuous, honest communication and contact with one another exists even if the contact is not in person but is by phone, mail or some other form. 2. A mutual task to carry out at home, school or on a job is willingly shared, discussed and enjoyed together. 3. An affinity or attraction to one another exists to the exclusion of others. 4. The company of one another is sought even when you both have a wide selection of other individuals from which to choose. 5. A sixth sense, ESP or other extra perceptual facility develops with which you can communicate at a nonverbal level, with no need for words to clutter or detract from the communication. 6. A sense of humor, sense of play and casualness develops in which you enjoy "give and take" and are relaxed in each other's company. 7. A protective sense of privacy and guardedness about your relationship exists; it is not subjected to public scrutiny, criticism or judgment. 8. The relationship is a productive enterprise resulting in mutual satisfaction, reward and reinforcement for each other. 9. The relationship has a purpose, direction and order to it that is reasonable, realistic and healthy for both of you. 10. A firm commitment, agreement or contract exists with each other to be mutually supportive, understanding and accepting of one another.

Obstacles to establishing intimacy in a relationship. The following behavior patterns or feelings are barriers to establishing healthy intimacy in a relationship: * Inability to develop trust in one another * Chronic sense of insecurity * Fear of failure * Fear of being vulnerable to being hurt or subjected to pain * Inability to take a risk * Inability to let go of hurts and fears from previous relationships * Lack of role models for healthy intimacy * Inability to recognize or accept one's own problem in handling intimacy * Inability to control the impact of anger, hostility or resentment in the relationship * Fear of losing the other in death or some other calamity * Fear of being successful in the attainment of intimacy * Inability to accept one's own responsibility in developing intimacy in the relationship * Inability to handle conflict within the relationship * Poor problem solving between the partners * Fear of loss of approval; fear of rejection * Chronic defensiveness * Over aggressiveness or passivity between the parties * Power struggles between the parties for control of the relationship * Competition between the parties * Poor communication * Blaming each other for problems in the relationship * Fear of being too exposed or being found out for whom you "really are" * Fear of claustrophobia or being smothered in the relationship * Desire to be left alone, isolated and ignored * Mental or physical health problems that impede the relationship's growth * Fear that the relationship will become sexual in nature (especially if the parties are not married) * Fear of loss of identity * Inability to show affection, tenderness or caring * Inability to be open, honest and forthright * Being in denial about needing help If the parties are married or are sexual partners, other obstacles include: * Fear of sexual intercourse * Fear of impotency, premature *********** or no *********** * Physically based sexual problems * Lack of candor, openness or honesty concerning sexuality * Unwillingness to be creative, explorative or imaginative sexually * Embarrassment with one another in the sexual arena * Poor body image and discomfort with nudity * Hangups due to moral, religious or value beliefs * Lack of appropriate education regarding sexuality * Unwillingness to establish a healing environment

Negative consequences inability to handle intimacy . If a person has a problem securing, establishing or maintaining intimacy in a relationship (in or out of marriage) that person is most likely going to feel unwanted, pessimistic about the future, uncared for, depressed, undesirable, anxious over personal performance, lonely, inadequate, isolated, confused about sexual identity or adequacy, abandoned, not "good enough," rejected, unloved, unattractive, unwilling to get involved, angry, resentful or hostile Beliefs which prevent establishing intimacy. * If I open myself up to another person, I am bound to get hurt and/or taken advantage of. * People with whom I have been involved with in the past have abused, neglected and mistreated me. How can I expect it to be different in the future? * People have said to me "I love you" and "I hate you"' in the same breath. I get so confused. How can I ever believe anyone? * If you open yourself up to trust someone, they will always take advantage of you. * I am a worthless, useless piece of junk. How could anyone ever care about me? * You are a ****, a ***** or a pig if you delight in sexual escapades with your husband. * You are a failure as a man and a husband if you ever fail to satisfy your wife sexually. * A women's role is to be subservient to men in all respects. * All men are out to rape or violate you. * All women are out to seduce, grab or chain you into a "jail" called marriage. * It is impossible to have a close friend of the opposite sex without the relationship becoming sexual in nature. * Married men and married women should never seek out friendships with married or single people of the opposite sex. It doesn't look good and people will never understand. * People who have close friendships in which they exchange signs of physical affection (like hugging and kissing) with partners of the same sex must be homosexual. * It is a feminine trait to be openly affectionate with another. * No one can keep a secret, so keep your personal business to yourself. * Intimacy always means sexuality and sexuality always means sexual intercourse. * It is impossible for men (or women) to remain faithful in a relationship. * Never get close to the people you work with! * Whenever you open yourself up to intimacy, you are bound to lose your friend through death or some other form of disaster. * I can take care of myself just fine. I don't need anyone else to clutter up my life. Behavior traits needed to handle healthy intimacy in a relationship. In order to secure, establish and maintain healthy intimacy in a relationship, you must: * Develop self-confidence in your ability to handle a relationship. * Believe in your self-worth, your goodness and abilities. * Let go of your fears. * Open yourself up to trust in the goodness of others. * Accept your body and body image. * Learn to take a chance, take a risk.

* Have knowledge of the required attributes of a healthy relationship. * Resolve feelings about past hurts, pains and failures. * Handle disagreements, conflicts or fights. * Forgive and forget past hurts. * Work out anger, resentment and hostility over the past. * Work out blocking irrational beliefs about relationships. * Maintain mutual assertiveness in the relationship. * Problem solve, make decisions and execute plans to correct, rectify and enhance the relationship. * Reduce competition and the struggle for power and control in the relationship. * Loosen up and show signs of physical affection and love to others. * Improve communication to an open, honest and productive level. * Address the sexual issues in the relationship. * Recognize the need for professional help and obtain such assistance. * Work out hangups, resistance and objections to healthy, normal sexual relationship with your partner.

Read more:

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Eriksons Theory: Intimacy versus Isolation

Intimacy Making a permanent commitment to intimate partner Other close relationships: friends, work Involves giving up some newfound independence, redefining identity Strong identity helps Successful resolution prepares for generativity
Caring for the next generation and improving society Isolation Without independence, people
define themselves in terms of their partner sacrifice self-respect and initiative

Without intimacy
Loneliness and self-absorption

A secure sense of intimacy enhances the quality of other close relationships Hesitate to form close ties Fear of losing identity
Compete Reject differences Threatened by closeness
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Vaillants Adaptation to Life

20s intimacy concerns 30s career consolidation 40s generative 50s60s keepers of meaning 70s spiritual and reflective
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Social Clock
Age-graded expectations for life events
I.e. 1st job, getting married, birth of 1st child, buying a home, retiring, etc.

Answers the question: How am I doing for my age? Less rigid than in earlier generations Following a social clock lends confidence, contributes to social stability Distress if not following or falling behind
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Selecting a Mate
Physical proximity Most select partners who are similar Gender differences
Women: intelligence, ambition, financials, morals Men: attractiveness, domestic skills

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Childhood Attachment and Adult Romantic Relationships

Jealousy, desperation, emotional highs & lows Seek quick love, Resistant complete merging Jealousy, emotional distance, little physical pleasure Stress independence, mistrust, anxiety about closeness Avoidant Trust, happiness, friendship Comfortable with intimacy; unafraid of abandonment Secure Working Model Adult Relationships Attachment History
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Sternbergs Triangular Theory of Love

3 components:
Intimacy: emotional component Passion: physical and psychological component Commitment: cognitive component
leads to decision to love and maintain love

Passionate love (sexual attraction) is strong at the beginning of a relationship, but then transitions to companionate love (warm, trusting affection and caregiving). Commitment determines whether a relationship survives.
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Gender and Friendship

Same-Sex Friendships
Gender differences
Womens more intimate

Individual differences

Longer friendships more intimate Single people more intimate with friends

Other-Sex Friendships
Fewer, shorter-lasting than same-sex
Educated, employed women have most

Benefits to both genders

Men: opportunity for expression Women: new views

Sexual attraction must be considered

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Factors in Loneliness
Unhappiness resulting from a gap between relationships we have and those we desire Socially anxious Insecure models of attachment Self-defeating behaviors, attitudes

Personal Characteristics
Separated, divorced, widowed Immigrants from collectivist cultures higher than those born in US or Canada

Peaks in late teens, early 20s Declines through 70s


Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Family Life Cycle

Early adulthood
Leaving home Joining families in marriage Parenthood

Middle adulthood
Launching children

Sequence of phases that characterizes development of most families

Late adulthood
Retirement Death of spouse
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Factors Related to Marital Satisfaction

Family backgrounds Age at marriage Length of courtship Timing of first pregnancy Relationship to extended family Financial and employment status Family responsibilities Personality characteristics
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Gender Differences in Marital Satisfaction

Men: Just being married improves physical and mental health
Attachment, belonging, social support

Women: Relationship quality is important

Overwhelming demands of many roles cause dissatisfaction

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Transition to Parenthood
Many profound changes Roles often become more traditional
Roles get less traditional with second birth

Marriage can be strained

Problems before children predict problems after Sharing care predicts happiness

Later parenthood eases transition

Couples groups, paid leave help, too

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

With adolescents
Brings sharp changes Challenges: negotiation of roles, dip in marital satisfaction

Powerful source of adult development With young children

Best parents work together as co-parenting team Challenges: few social supports; hard to find child care
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Can be preparation for marriage
North Americans who cohabit before marriage more likely to divorce

Can be alternative to marriage

More accepted in Western Europe

Unmarried, sexually intimate, living together Increasing

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Divorce Rates
Stabilized since 1980s 45% U.S., 30% Canadian marriages
About 7% higher for remarriages soon after first marriage

First seven years, midlife most common times

Young and adolescent children involved
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Causes and Factors in Divorce

Background factors: age, religion, prior divorce, family background SES Gender roles, expectations Ineffective problem solving Separate lives Major problems: Infidelity, money issues, substance abuse

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Consequences of Divorce

Major change of life and self

Opportunities for positive and negative change

Immediate consequences - generally subside in 2 years

Disrupted social networks, support Increased anxiety, depression, impulsive behavior Traditional women, noncustodial fathers may have more problems

New partner helps satisfaction

More important to men
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Remarriage After Divorce

Most within four years of divorce
Men sooner than women

Vulnerable to breakup
Reasons for marriage
Often too pragmatic

Carry over negative patterns View divorce as acceptable resolution Stepfamily stress

Takes 3-5 years to blend

Education, couples and family counseling can help
Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Challenges to Womens Career Development

Discontinuous employment
Leave for child-rearing, family care Hinders advancement

Concentration low-paying, low-advancement jobs

Contributes to salary gap

Low self-efficacy for male-dominated fields Gender stereotyping Few mentors

Copyright Allyn & Bacon 2004

Work-Family Balance
Dual-earner marriages dominant family form
Most also parents

Role overload common problem

Especially for women

Workplace supports can help

Time flexibility

How to Free Your Mind

12 Sunday Sep 2010 Posted by Archmage in Black Book of The Invincible Rites, Genius Level Event, Magick, SEO Leave a Comment Tags

Photo-Journalism, September, The Black Book of the Invincible Rites, Video-Journalism We approach the singularity. Its inexorable conclusion accelerates toward us at an exponential rate. It changes the way we interact with technology, each other, and even ourselves. Soon our technology will be smarter, stronger, and more versatile than the majority of humanity that chooses to stay safe on the back end of this inevitability. Humans can still guide their own evolution. We still have that power. The power to free our own minds and guide us down a path to ascension that will have being apart of the singularity, rather than be left behind by it. But that time, our time, is running out. This is a white hat methodology to start a process to Free Your Mind. It does not include any black hat techniques like illegal drugs, self-proclaimed expert short-cuts, Buy Now to be Better lies, teachers espousing supposed secrets that have been in published writings for thousands of years, or any Join us to learn the truth cult preachings. These are practical applications of well-published realities.

Part I: {The Start} 1. Identify your Kill Factors {Right Effort / Perception and Will} What are your weaknesses, addictions, and psychological impairments? Identify all your negativities and start working out a plan to eliminate them. Despite poetic license to the contrary, it is not our flaws that make us human, but our ability to overcome them. Remember that the pain of discipline yields far greater rewards than the pain of regret. 2. Practice Discernment {Right Speech / Silence and Solitude} How often do you truly examine what you see? Read? Do? Believe? Stare deeply into the significance of everything around you and start dividing between the wondrous and worthless. Do not confuse discernment with cynicism or sentimentality. See the world, truly and surely, without fear, doubt, or disbelief, without absolutes, attachments, or fanaticism. 3. Learn Mental Discipline {Right Mindfulness / Control and Patience} Meditation is an essential mechanism to learn solidity of the self, centering, and breathing. Memory exercises include a plethora of tools to improve the three different memory nodes and the vertices that branch from them. Concentration exercises usually starts at 15 minutes a day, but Gurus can concentrate on a single flame for days or weeks without food or water. Visualization is a simple practice that helps our inner eye start to see what our outer eyes cannot.

The eyes of an artist pick details, shadows, and colors, the rest of miss. There are thousands of mind strengthening techniques to be used, but whatever we do, do with the fervency of prayer and the discipline of a martial art. Part II: {The Path} 4. Keep a Journal {Right Concentration / Pain and Fortitude} This is the most difficult discipline for some and the easiest for others, there is rarely an inbetween. So the questions are: Why is it important? How do I do it? How will it help? A journal catalogues and regulates the progress from Sleeper to Awakened throughout your personal singularity. To remember your successes and failures, to see what still needs to be done and provide notations on the various resources and searches, strategies and plans that move us toward that end. Also it is a way to provide some record of our path to responsibly help those that come after us. To assist those that need the additional instruction. As to how you keep it: However. Digitally, physically or in some other method. But apply yourself to it everyday with as much pertinent information as possible. You never know, never will know, what strange piece of lost memory could have helped you change the way for the better. We lose so much of ourselves to forgetfulness that by our end days we become only a vessel for those few memories we retain. 5. Find a Teacher {Right Intention / Respect and Honor} It is said by various people that when the student is ready a teacher will appear. This is rarely the case. It is a great mechanism to extort money from the unsuspecting, but a true awakening is never so lazy as being able to sit around and wait for the perfect teacher to knock on our doors. We learn when we pursue that learning. Many things are auto-didactic, self-taught, but each person will have areas that require special attention. If you possess a neurosis or chemical imbalance perhaps you need a psychologist. If you have trouble slipping into a meditative state, as many people do, you may need a spiritual guide. Perhaps you are looking for your own brand of techno-transcendence, alchemical ascension, or just need answers to questions that the books you have read do not cover. Either way a teacher can make the difference between using the violin properly or continually frustrating our neighbors with the cat screeching we try to call music. Research, Discern, and Decide. We are all students even those that help us on this path. 6. Take responsibility for the World {Right Perception / Imagination and Curiosity} Too often we are so focused on our own personal paradigms we neglect the truth. We are not individuals each competing for awakening, but a culture of half-asleep sentience all struggling together to create a universal transcendence. To awaken we must also help others to do the same. Be Green and promote green awareness. Volunteer to save starving children, animals, or the homeless. Join a political cause. Educate those around you, subtly and without pretension. Take responsibility for the future of ALL humankind, not just your own. Our world is not a paradise and to ignore this is to sleep forever in the iniquity of our ignorance. Part III: {The End} 7. The Eight Simplicities {Right Livelihood / Belief and Grace} There are eight small activities that change us slowly into the evolution we seek if we practice them everyday. Breathe, consciously and rightly, focus on the breath and we free ourselves from

fear. Laugh, freely and with innocence. Laughter centers us and dispels bad thoughts and emotions. Smile, this puts others at ease and releases chemicals that give us strength and confidence. Stretch, to work out the cold banality and pain of the days previous worries. Dance, with abandon, to dispel the angers and inhibitions of our lizard brain. Listen, to the sounds of people, nature, the world itself. Learn to discern the language of the universe. Dream, of better worlds, different places, people you know and could know. When we dream we are free. The world we live in was made by dreamers. Play, as a child, as a free spirit, as a person who can be whomever they choose. Play in an amusement park, at the zoo, play as if there are no other cares but to swing and touch the stars. We are what we do everyday. 8. Dosing and Experimentation {Right Thought / Teaching and Learning} Dosing in this context is the means of applying a regime of mind/body altering substances for the purpose of mental, physical, and spiritual enhancement. The use of isochronic tones and binaural beats can be of use. Self-hypnotism. Various video arrays for self-improvement exist. Using Nootropics like Piracetam and Choline along with Bacopa, in addition to multi-vitamins etc. Experimentation with Vision Quests, Virtual Reality, or one of the new Mind-Control training games that comes with a neural headset. Play games like Chess, Risk, Go, Sudoku or any of the daily mind exercise games found throughout the web. Listen to unusual music; go to movies you would never normally watch, or places you were either uninterested or afraid to go. Dose yourself with life, change and become awakened. 9. Final Thoughts {Right Awakening / I am Human} There are a thousand petals on the flower of the singularity, a thousand ways to free your mind. These are a good baseline, a good place to start but they do not represent an all-inclusive list, or even a best hits of everything possible. Proper research, training, and discernment are necessary to find the path, places, and techniques that are right for you. A beginning is a star that eventually becomes the event horizon of something more. Download the Free PDF http://darkmuseministry/how-to-free-your-mind.pdf

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Grimoires and Shadows

07 Saturday Aug 2010 Posted by Archmage in Black Book of The Invincible Rites, Magick

Leave a Comment Tags Photo-Journalism, The Black Book of the Invincible Rites, Video-Journalism Many have written books of or about magick over the years. Some to shed light on the

discoveries they had made and help those after them. Some to create some system whereby they could further the great work and some to simply make a quick profit. There are many notable books that should bear qualitative study such as the Orphans Grimoire, a handbook of those skills, rites, and materials necessary to perform magick without the aid of guidance from mentors, parents, or teachers, the Arch-Mages Black Book of the Invincible Rites, and Photius Fisks Tetragrammaton. But do not mistake the ability to read a book of magick to be the same as the ability to practice what that book contains. This mistake is the reason why many initiates become burned out shells, soulless husks, or simply disenchanted with the idea that magick is possible in the first place.

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A Tarot Playlist Major Arcana

08 Thursday Jul 2010 Posted by Archmage in Black Book of The Invincible Rites, Cloud, Lightning, Magick, Media Leave a Comment Tags

Video-Journalism 0 The Fool Nirvana Teen Spirit I The Magician Bad Religion I Want to Conquer the World II The High Priestess Garbage When I Grow Up III The Empress Tori Amos God IV The Emperor Oysterhead Wield the Spade V The Hierophant Fiona Apple Nothings Gonna Change My World VI The Lovers Smashing Pumpkins Tonight, Tonight VII The Chariot Incubus Drive VIII Strength Cake I Will Survive IX The Hermit Red Hot Chili Peppers Soul to Squeeze X Wheel of Fortune Radiohead Karma Police XI Justice Alanis Morrisette Ironic XII The Hanged Man Filter Hey Man, Nice Shot XIII Death VAST A Better Place XIV Temperance Tool Schism

XV The Devil Guns N Roses Sympathy for the Devil XVI The Tower Black Sabbath War Pigs XVII The Star System of a Down Spiders XVIII The Moon Butthole Surfers Pepper XIX The Sun Gorillaz Clint Eastwood XX Judgment REM End of the World XXI The World Don Mclean American Pie Whats to come? The universe has a strategy. It fights a constant war against our inadequacy to understand, and it has its own Rules of Engagement for this war. We try to comprehend the vastness of its complexity but only ever see the shadow of its walls. Everyone has there interpretation. An interpretation like that shown below that is neither wrong nor right as long as it works. Like ordering a coffee in France when you dont know French. If you can point and gesture and articulate persuasively enough eventually youll get your coffee, or your enlightenment.

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I give you this lightning, but beware

30 Wednesday Jun 2010 Posted by Archmage in Black Book of The Invincible Rites, Effigy, Epiphany, Gates, Genius Level Event, In Memoriam, Lightning, Strategic Intelligence Leave a Comment

Greetings to the infinite jury. I have begun on this quest with white hat intentions to mold, make, and magickate a society for the scorned. The soldier that wears a pentagram, the honest psychic awash in the sea of sell-outs, the post modern pagan worshiping a future that relies on her decisions. I trialed out tidbits from the tributary of my ocean of knowledge and found that baiting the born among you has no flavor. This world relies on the insane insight of innumerable innovation. We pay homage to the great creators from the Einsteins and Oppenheimers to the Jobs and Gates. Its official, we as a race, are a cult of genius worshipers. But I digress. To make this simpler I wish to state that my purpose, place and power is to create within you the desire to optimize, evolve, and re-manage your life as a re-born genius. My expectation is to give unto this vast dimensional abyss of digital real estate barons a new language to help you create a better internal programming, a better operating system for the body, mind, and spirit. And from there we will merge this language, this vision, this new reality into a will stronger than virus ridden cowards that prey upon our truth. What does this mean to the congregation? I will be as always attempting to disclose and divulge the methodology to becoming more human than simply human.The knowledge to acquire a science of the will and the language to change reality in accordance with that science. So nothings changed? On the contraryI have been in contact with various magi, visionaries, organizations, and houses of the holy and can tell you without doubt that the change is coming, is here, is happening. Men and women rising up to become greater than they are without need for the approval of their peers. To maintain my titular epistemological monopoly of Archmage I must renew, redouble, and reinforce my efforts a thousand fold until my determination is like the steel of a katana, only sharp on one side but impressively cool all the same. To this end I promise to you that one day the sky will darken as The Apocalypse Vanguard rises from the flames of iniquity and we will hear the cheer of forever as humankind finally Awakens

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The Dark Muse Ministry is my creation. Devoted to anyone that is dedicated to making a skill of luck and set upon paths that lead inexorably towards the extraordinary. To dare for greatness, knowing our spirits need work, our hearts need victory, our minds need celebration, and our bodies need beauty.


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