You are on page 1of 20

It is with great pleasure that I introduce to you the contributors of Grotto Magazine.

Inspired by Platos Allegory of the Cave, each issue will present a unique
approach to social issues, while providing critical thinking and coping tools in discourse analysis and conflict resolution.
s or ne at Jo Cre Sin r & ito Ed

As Editor and Chief, I will be your guide to a descent into the mind.

Venger Satanis Founder Cthulhu Cult

Prince Will Collins Lawyer, Cultist

Lori Robinson Writer, Press Agent

Kelsey Daniels Church of Ahriman

Brian Fullem Founder Temple of Xeper

Joseph Gitchuway

Gino S. Vaglivielo Theistic Satanist

Editor, Creator

Cover photo credit: Rufous Image ID: 10267195

Explorers of the Abysmal Self


The Grotto magazine A descent into power.

Summer Edition
4.Get over it by Venger Satanis
The authentic outsider

Through an honest approach of social issues, culture, and politics; we offer a peek into the rationality of people who live it. It is through their own personal disciplines, self-awareness, and judgment that we leave no stone unturned. We are the explorers of the abysmal self, the fearless descent inward before we can ever spiral upward. It is our hope that readers will find their own way down into the depths of Truth.

5, 6. Tools of the Bullshit Artist by Kelsey Daniels

The wilds of wizards

7, 8, 9 . Deaths Ladder by Lori Robinson

In the shadow of death

9, 10. Individuality by Brian Fullem

Obstacles in group work

11, 12. What is Man? By Prince Will Collins


12, 13, 14. Group Efforts, SIN JONES

What does it take?

15. Reader Reviews

Reader feedback
Modern thinkers come together in the Grotto, to share their ideas, and provide a platform for a mind to mind exchange.

19. Marketplace

Experiential knowledge, method, and primal essence; a way to refine our human experience.

Letter from the Editor


Group efforts, what does it take?

What keeps people going?

Motivated? Why do they get behind an idea in the first place to revel against it later? It seems to be a growing trend in Social Networking platforms. Groups form, people have ideas but then the discourse ensues. Those coordinating the effort seem to be lost in terms of how to run a group effectively and offer conflict resolution when discourse arises. Group work is fundamental in activism, coordination, services provided to any given community as well as achieving personal life goals.

When asking the question: What is man? It could be answered a number of ways, and no answer provided is the ultimate truth. And yet, the question seeks an answer. Most world religions perpetuate the idea that man is an emanation of some divine power, they call God. (G)god = what exactly? Another term that cannot be defined ultimately. In any case, man=? + god=? still equals "?" In the abstract god is everything and nothing. There is an ideal that many hold that becoming god means to be the ultimate hero archetype of the self; saving you from yourself while exceeding your humanity3. Dissecting man provides some answers; at the very least biologically man can be classified as a species of animal that seems to rise above other species in man's own interpretation. This is due to his intellect and his ability to reason. Man seems to think its superior to other species, it will even put other species under-foot. Many of them are broken and exterminated as pests in the civilizing of nature. This earthly province leads man to believe in a reality about man itself. Throw a man in the oceanHe either sinks or swimsFor a time. Ultimately, man is not king of the sea, there are many species present that would certainly devour him wholly. In spite of this, man still believes he is superior. This reality tends to be the very obstacle he faces in everyday life. This extends to superiority over others of his own kind.

This issue explores obstacles one may face when orchestrating a group effort, or at the very least participating in one. Are you an outsider? Are you aware of the tools used in social strata to create discourse? As you climb deaths ladder, do you spend the majority of your time looking down, when you should be looking at the step you stand upon in this moment? How is your individuality keeping you in a perpetual state of flux? And finally, what is man Really?

Venger Satanis: Identifying the authentic outsider Kelsey Daniels: Tools of the Bullshit Artist Lori Robinson: Deaths Ladder, a fiction. Brian Fullem: Individuality Prince Will Collins: What is Man?

Five unique approaches to group efforts for reader consideration and introspect. Ontology1 is a topic that surfaces almost daily in man's pursuit of his purpose. What should man be doing with his time? Is he really aware of how short a time he has? The old saying: "2Become who you are" seems relevant here. We do tend to over rationalize things, when gut-instinct is screaming under the surface and smothering our ability to know answers to questions instinctively. What strange creatures we are, human beings.

Imagine yourself in the sea, and the realization of what man actually is just might paint a reality. When approaching group work, self-awareness is key but it doesnt mean that in the moment you will remember this. In fact, most people forget themselves in an instant. And so, man continues on in his fiddling, and the world turns in spite of his presence. We see it all the time, the sentiments: Why cant we just get along? Why cant we give peace a chance? Are there really vapid people in this world or are we all in the same ocean? Just because we tread water in the same sea, it doesnt mean we are the same or created equally. We each have our own thoughts, feelings and experiences (Individuality). Even this is an obstacle, especially in group efforts. What we each believe we are, what we are striving towards, and what we wish to become doesnt coincide with the beliefs of others.

Ontology: The study of existence and ways of being. Philosophical dissection of over-analyzing using rational and reasoning but negating instinct. Attributed to Fredrich Nietzsche

Taming Primal Essence, Spring Edition of Grotto Magazine

More than most, find it frustrating to even think about. And so, we have large populations of people droning on, part of a system that they feel helpless to change. They really have no idea how much power they actually have. Even the minutest amount of power can be used to propel a movement forward and start a chain-reaction in the way we see ourselves, behave, and affect others. The effect? A push and pull that is the necessary friction to keep things moving. For if atoms stopped dancing, we unmanifest.

There is a level of conflict and discourse that sparks new ideas and movements all the time. The trouble then, is that we dont all want the same things or see the world (systems) in the same way. What we can do, and what I believe we should be doing is constantly analyzing ourselves as way out of the sea.

Grotto Magazine is a group effort. Each issue will include articles, and commentary by those that seek to manifest its vision. If you would like to contribute, contact SIN JONES at

Grotto Magazine is in need of contributors, illustrators, marketeers, proof-readers and Graphic Designers.
Send inquiries to:

here are three types of outsiders, each

with their own reason for existing on the outside, and a respective mindset emanating from that identity. I've included my personal recommendation to go along with the first two types because, for one thing, I'm tired of reading how terrible this, that, and the other thing is, just because it's somehow related to the mainstream, society, or pop-culture. It wouldn't be so bad if there was a viable alternative suggested, or a compromise of aesthetics proposed. Unfortunately, I keep wallowing in online negativity; the kind of drivel spouted by wannabe outsiders who believe their critique actually serves a purpose. So, you might want to keep the following in mind when reading future missives from the disenfranchised elite. There is the subjugated outsider who doesn't belong, who just never fit in with the other boys and girls growing up. This first type senses that they are undesirable (possibly even inferior), but protects their fragile ego by gravitating towards opposing viewpoints. The most outspoken outsiders are of this breed. Subjugated outsiders go on and on about their inherent "differentness". In this case, and according to the subjugated, different equals superior. They are usually vocal about being more intelligent and worthy of respect than their peers, or will brag about how individualistic they are in comparison to the masses.

Of course, the subjugated outsider feels this is how to get ahead; winning people over by embodying the opposition. Beaten down by life, this type of outsider can only futilely rage against the machine.

My advice: just get over it.

There is the pretentious outsider who realizes that he will probably never receive the recognition which he "deserves" just by being himself. That means the authentic self (which is not outside the norm) is seen as a lost cause. This type is ostentatious and affected so as to be noticed and thought of as special. For the pretentious outsider, that false glimmer of recognition is more valuable than blending in with the crowd. For them, saying and doing things as the majority would only confirm their secret fear of anonymity. That is why this type creates an exterior "outsider persona" to jazz up their banal insides.

This third type of outsider occasionally finds himself on the outside either because his interests or belief system is unconventional, or slightly skewed away from the majority. This breed of outsider, who has tried (with some success) to assimilate with society; usually minimize his strangeness in many circumstances. He is not pushed into the role of outsider by the masses, nor does he move towards the minority because it's "cool" or "fashionable". The authentic outsider realizes that he is different than most, but instead of dwelling on such differences he attempts to integrate himself and/or his works into society. Oftentimes, he can't understand why his ideas are so seldom accepted. This type provides a much needed alternative to the mainstream, are generally shunned by contemporaries, yet are heralded as innovators and absorbed into the cultural melting-pot posthumously. This is the true outsider in the tradition of Nietzsche, Crowley, Lovecraft, and LaVey.

For them, I have no advice. Keep doing what you're doing, and continue to be yourselves!
By His loathsome tentacles, Venger As'Nas Satanis Ipsissimus Cult of Cthulhu 6

My advice: just get over yourself.

Lastly, we have the authentic outsider who can and, indeed, wishes to belong, who does (to a certain degree) fit in with society when he chooses.

This is basic hypnosis. I will not go much deeper into this because I dont wish to sharpen swords or put them in the wrong hands. This is the importance of the number 7.

Most people have been ripped off by petty thieves, salesmen, or family members. These are examples of small time bullshit artists. There are those out there that use other methods to take what they want from you. These are actual human predators, and most have above average intelligence and sociopathic behaviors. Not all are sociopaths but they have the ability to objectify their victims to the point that they lose the ability to see them as human. For some reason the occult community seems to have more than other communities, and in Satanism they seem to flourish. This is due to individual morals and in each their own way of life. How do they work this magic? The subconscious mind works off of symbols. Words have associated symbols that get filtered through the conscious mind. The conscious mind can only handle so many high charged symbols at a time (7 symbolic words a min). Once you pass 7 symbolic words the filter is shut down and all information goes directly to the subconscious mind.

Now, once the subconscious is broken and the suggestion is planted in, it requires confirmation. This requires 3 confirmations of the plant outside the hypnotic session. There must be 3 confirmations consciously. Once this is accomplished the person will fulfill the plant. Also, if a person confirms a decision that they made 3 times, then they will fulfill their own choice. Note: When a plant is to be fulfilled, it will be affirmed as an impulsive action without judgment.

Now, the only thing that will hold a person at bay once an implant begins is their moral boundaries. You push someone slightly over their moral bounds and they will turn against you. Also, you wont get them past that bound very far anyway. Now, here is the other bullshit part, once you have broken the boundary or a law, the bullshit artist will use blackmail to get you to continue in negative behavior.

Obliviously, exposure to the authorities or loved ones, this only works if the victim believes the bullshit artist. In other words, imagine the school yard bully all grown up. Remember, belief is the key issue here. Question everything that the bullshit artist says and does, it is the quickest way to dispel the bullshit and the belief to be created.

Some ways to recognize these wizards, is to recognize character traits. In example, they tell long winded stories about themselves. Normally they are the hero of these stories and everyone else is the villain or an enemy that had to be struck down righteously. Know that within these stories are a bit of truth blended with the lie. This makes this bullshit believable while providing key reminders for the bullshit artist to remember when questioned about the story at a later date. It is normally during story-time that they insert 7 symbolic words. Typically this occurs when they see that your becoming bored with the story or the conversation that is occurring. The plant then becomes part of the story. They bring the victim out and go over questions to attain the 3 confirmations needed to ensure the plant.

Creatures like this have always walked the Earth and always will. Once you run across them, it is best to let them be. If you cannot, be on your mental guard and minimize your contact with these people. The most powerful wizards were the ones with many souls in many jars and I hope I have unveiled the wizards game and how it works. I agree with the Bible, that these types of witches should be destroyed without regard. The problem then, is identifying this skill of craft. Press forward with more knowledge and free will, but most importantly, self-awareness so as not to be the vessel for the will of others.

Kelsey Daniels, Church of Ahriman

It is sad to say that I had to die for my life to really begin. I had spent the majority of my 30 years doing what most people do, going to work, coming home, going back to work and coming back home. I never questioned my repetitious lifestyle, and never really wanted more, simply because I didnt believe there was anything more out there. And then, I died. I didnt expect it to happen and as I hovered over my broken and battered body, lying in a curiously twisted state on the wet pavement below, its lifeblood pumping out to pool beneath it, the only thought that went through my mind was, Way to go, moron. You really fucked up this time. I felt a hand settle on the shoulder of my ethereal body and I turned to see a darkly, handsome man standing behind me.

The thought had no sooner crossed my mind before I found myself standing outside the buildings double doors, which opened automatically to invite me in. It was no different than any other office building; grey walls, grey floors and a reception desk in the middle of the lobby. A feminine energy was managing the desk and she turned her attention to me. Theyre waiting for you, she said, just through there. She pointed to another set of double doors across the room. I looked to my guide and he nodded. Do I have to? I asked him, and again he nodded.

Its time to go, he said. It wasnt in me to question him, as the world before me began to darken and I was sucked backward into the shadow of death. Where are we going? I asked the man, after a while of feeling space and time moving around me; I was more curious than afraid. To the place we all go, he answered, simply.

I drifted to those doors and, like the first set, they opened effortlessly in welcome of my approach. I moved through that dual portal into what seemed a conference room of sorts; ten beings sat at a massive table. I took one of the two vacant chairs and my guide settled down in the one next to me. Ambry Allen, one of the beings said, Were sorry to find you here so soon, however, welcome to your life as it has been the last 30 mortal years.

His curt answer punctuated the end of our journey, as the speed in which we were traveling began to slow and then stop. I found we were standing in front of a watery membrane of sorts. Through its opaque, jelly like wall, I could see the haze of lights and movement. It was a little like holding up a milk jug and trying to see through it, I thought. With a gentle push on my back, my companion propelled me into the membrane; I felt the molecules and atoms of my ethereal form, shift, dissolve and reassemble as I broke through to the other side.

I looked around with interest. It seemed the membrane had spit me out into what looked like any city in any other part of the world, except it was clean. There was no smog, no fog, and no loud noises. Other wraithlike forms floated back and forth down the paved streets of the city, moving silently in and out of buildings. All seemed to be busy with a purpose that was unknown to me. I turned to my guide and he gestured wordlessly toward a single level building at the end of the busy street. Think yourself to be there and you will, he said.

The lights dimmed and a large screen flickered to life on the wall of the room. As images began to play across the screen, it took a few moments to realize the child on the screen was me. I saw myself as a young baby in a crib, crying to be held, but no arms came to pick me up. That image faded and was replaced by a toddler version of me, walking on shaky legs down a dirty street, again crying as my soiled diaper sagged low on my bottom. Strangers passed by as if I didnt exist in their world of ghetto life. My bare feet were filthy and there was feces smeared across my naked stomach. My hair was dirty and matted against my small head. I was bombarded with feelings of confusion, anger and fear, as this scene played out, and it struck me that the emotions I was experiencing were that of the child, of myself, as it wandered those streets, alone, hungry and afraid.

The images progressed to a few years later, a small malnourished version of the toddler was huddled in the corner of a ratty apartment as police and paramedics zipped up body bags belonging to my parents. My father, an addict, had murdered my mother, a prostitute, in front of me. When the arms of a police officer encircled me, I could feel my embarrassment because I knew I smelled horrible, yet he held me close. I desperately wanted to cling to him, though I knew instinctively that those arms wouldnt hold me for long; they never did. 9

The images played through, showing the younger me moving from various foster homes, sometimes being dropped off in the middle of the night into tiny houses where my bedroom was little more than a closet with a shelf to put the few things I owned on it. In some of the homes, I was treated well, but there were others where I was beaten, abused and molested repeatedly. My only reprieve was in knowing that I never stayed in one place long enough for the abuse to continue for any length of time. My teen years flew by and I saw myself as the introverted, mistrusting adolescent my formative years had driven me to. I made no friends, keeping to myself as I moved through the placements in the foster care system until finally, it spit me out at age 18, unprepared and ill-equipped for life in mainstream society. How I struggled in those early years of adulthood. For a few months, I lived on the streets, eating out of garbage cans behind restaurants, my clothes threadbare and torn in places. I begged for money and odd jobs, always on the verge of selling my body in the same manner that my mother had sold hers, though I did everything I could to resist sinking to that level, keeping upper most in my mind that her choices had led me to the path I was on in my own life. I was angry at the world, angry with my parents for bringing me forth into such a pitiful, pathetic existence.

It was on the way home from that endless cycle, which was my life, that I lost control of the car. I watched with utter detachment as my body twitched in the final throes of death. When the screen went blank and the lights came on, I found every being at that table staring at me in expectation. I spread my hands wide before me. What do you want me to say? I asked them. What do you want to say, the head being asked me; how did that review of your life make you feel?

I honestly dont know, I answered. My life had no purpose, I suppose so its no great loss that its over. We disagree, the being said. You had every opportunity to follow the life path of your mortal parents, you chose not to. While you cheated yourself by never forming the life connections most humans need in order to survive, you managed to come through each experience stronger and more determined than the last. You did what it took for you to survive without repeating the cycle of abuse; quite an achievement. You learned not to be a slave to the trappings of your environment, but rather to walk apart from them. The other beings nodded in agreement. You learned to channel your anger and your disappointment at the hand you were dealt and make something positive out of it. However, you have done nothing with the product of those life lessons it cautioned. What was I supposed to do with them? I asked. Share them, Ambry, the being said. Share them with others like yourself who may not see the way through the trauma as clearly as you have. Share yourself with others that can benefit from your experiences. Help them pull themselves out of the pit of despair they live in and show them that there is another way. Who are you people? I asked, looking at each being in turn. We are another you, they answered in unison. The you that has gone before, and the you that will continue to go on. There is no God that sits in judgment. There is no Satan that waits to take you to a hell for evil youve done. There is only you for yourself, Ambry. Those entities live in you and only you can judge yourself and only you can save yourself. I knew then that what they said was true. Many times throughout my life, I had appealed to the god that others believed guided and protected us, but those appeals had never felt right. Instead, I appealed to myself, pushing myself to work harder, to become better, so that I could outrun a past that haunted me, a past that kept me from really living.

I watched as my life on the screen began to take a turn toward the better when a kindly old man gave me job in his small convenience store just outside the projects where I was living. Hed found me scrounging through the stores waste, looking for sandwiches that were thrown away daily, and had taken pity on the starving piece of trash that I was. He allowed me to live in his storeroom until I managed to save up enough to rent a small rat infested apartment. Rat infested or not, I didnt care. It was mine. By the next year, I was balancing his books and making purchases as well as earning a decent enough wage that I was able to move from the rat hole to a smaller but nicer place. Throughout the five years I worked for him, I kept no relationships, other than the tentative friendship I maintained with him. He trusted me, he liked me; it was I who had the difficult time believing he saw anything of worth in me. When he died, I was stunned to learn that he left everything he had to me and I vowed to work hard at turning that small convenience store into a success. By the time I was 29, Id been able to open two stores and had moved far from the projects of Brooklyn into a nice studio flat where rats feared to tread. Though I managed a meager success financially, emotionally and mentally I was shut down. I looked at life through the tunnelvision manner of a zombie. A flesh bag run by a droning program: Work, come home, work, come home. Like some binary code compelling me forward, and half the time, I dont even know whats motivating it to keep going.


Id broken free of the cycle of poverty, abuse and filth but Id remained enslaved to memory of those things. By keeping so closely to myself, Id kept those memories close as well, rather than bringing them into the light of day where they could be put to constructive use. I turned to my guide who had sat stoically silent throughout the review; Id like to go back now, I told him.

Brian Fullem

He nodded, a small smile playing about his lips, I was hoping youd say that. It took several months to heal from the injuries of the accident, and even longer to convince myself that I could do what I had determined I would, during that life review.

We have all struggled with the Group Dynamic at one point or another; this seems to always stem from our inherent individuality, independence and our own way of doing things. As Individuals we don't like to be told to "do this and do it this way" or be directed whatsoever really. We dont like it, but it doesnt mean we cant learn to live with it. Though we may strive for the same goals, we have the idea that our way is best and this causes great conflicts within the group dynamic. For this reason, before a group is in process of carrying out their tasks, a meeting should be conducted so that everyone can have their say. Its not a bad idea to get a consensus understanding of the group efforts purpose, it goals, and what it hopes to achieve according to the groups timeline. Allowing for individualism is key in any group effort. Especially in brainstorming ideas about how the group should go about achieving their goals. Even if some ideas seem unfavorable to some participants. Formal discussion will help create a mutual understanding and perhaps a closer bond with those participating, making the group strong by the individual but even stronger as a group. Understanding each point of view, and will also prepare everyone for future disagreements and conflicts. We should always remember to compromise, but never at the cost of the predetermined goals. One person should not undermine the growth and success of an effort, but instead use that person's skill-set where needed. I.e. if a person isnt a good "idea" person, perhaps they have other beneficial talents to offer. Example, you might not be a good writer but you may have an eye for editing, or marketing. Now, everyone always has their own agenda, these must be carefully dealt with as we have seen many "leaders" of organizations use their group for personal gain. These problems can be solved by either not having the "leadership" roles at all, or rotating leadership roles among the group as the need to do so comes and goes. No one person should lead an entire group for a span of years. There are many obstacles to overcome in the group dynamic, but with enough discussion and a quality group of people, participants are more willing to listen more than they speak. A successful group effort is possible, but it takes consideration and mediation. To unite as One we must think as a cohesive unit.

As I walked into that dilapidated apartment building, knocking on the door at the end of the dark hallway and seeing the little child with the black eyes who answered, I was convinced that my past wouldnt be used as my crutch, but rather as a ladder to help others rise above their own tragedy.

Lori Robinson


To do that, you will need to understand each part of that cohesion and appreciate its worth to become a formidable force of accomplishment. My best advice, is to always remember that there is no such thing as "too much discussion". One must be patient and determined to succeed; things don't happen overnight and great things may take years or even lifetimes to get going. The common purpose of a group is strength in numbers. The passion of one can do much, the passions of many can do more. Passion will either make the group flourish or destroy itself from the inside out. Never lose that passion, but don't let that passion get in the way of the group effort. Harness it and put it all into your part of the whole, and do it to the best of your ability. Any obstacles the group faces, the group must deal with in a civil and kind manner, for we are All as One, and if a part of us is broken or hurt then we All are broken and hurt. Love and understanding is key, and with that we can do anything. Our nature as individuals will create clashes and quarrels, never forget your objectivity in the group dynamic. These differences in opinion and direction can be resolved by group meetings designed for the very purpose of resolving these specific issues. Rotate the role of Conductor for these meetings so everyone can gain an understanding of all sides of the group so that the best person for each job can be dictated by the best work done by the Individual.

Make sure that the two have properly discussed the goals and their ideas for being as efficient as they can be within the group meeting and all parties involved in the meeting can aid the two (or section of the group) in their project and offer ways to resolve the issues without bad blood being shed on any end.

The group must work as a unit and appreciate that without the group's unified effort, the group's goals cannot be met. We must always keep our individuality and our True Self intact, but we cannot force ourselves on anyone else. Through each other we expand and define ourselves and we must all treat each other with respect. We should appreciate the fact that we can't do everything alone, and when you find a group that has the same passion for the same goals and cause as you, understand that they have their own drive, determination and talents that may aid in your expansion and the success of the group, and thus the expansion and success of yourself.

When conflicts surface, they must be dealt with, its never good to argue. We can agree to disagree but the situation must be handled as efficiently as possible, arguing will only hinder progress. Example, if someone is of the opinion that another isn't doing their part efficiently then let the person with the issue take on that role or work on that project with the person currently obliged to that role/project.

Make sure that the two have properly discussed the goals and their ideas for being as efficient as they can be within the group meeting and all parties involved in the meeting can aid the two (or section of the group) in their project and offer ways to resolve the issues without bad blood being shed on any end. The group must work as a unit and appreciate that without the group's unified effort, the group's goals cannot be met. We must always keep our individuality and our True Self intact, but we cannot force ourselves on anyone else. Through each other we expand and define ourselves and we must all treat each other with respect. We should appreciate the fact that we can't do everything alone, and when you find a group that has the same passion for the same goals and cause as you, understand that they have their own drive, determination and talents that may aid in your expansion and the success of the group, and thus the expansion and success of yourself.

Rule of thumb:

The group is an extension of you, and yourself is a further expansion of the group, or "One out of Many". Any obstacle can be resolved with formal discussion and mutual understanding of the group's format and goals.


What is Man?
Prince Will Collins I have never being called out as early as I was on that day. The call came by 5 am as I was getting ready for meditation; it was no time for dallying. I rushed down to Chief Tunde's mansion getting there in record time of 50 minutes mainly because the traffic was light that early. I am the family lawyer. I met Chief, as he is fondly called in his jeep obviously ready to drive out which was unusual, normally he is driven, this morning he was in the driver's seat and he beckoned on me to get into the passenger's front seat which I curiously did. I did not know what to make of the situation. As soon as he drove out of his compound, he revealed to me that he was called this morning by the police and requested to be at the state police command, Ikeja C.I.D section by one Inspector Bola. He was afraid, not for committing any offence but for what he feared might be the reason, bad news. His son Taye, has been missing for two days now. I was there. On the evening of Saturday April 14, Kehinde was the toast of the evening and the reason was obvious, it was her twenty-second birthday, her father had spared no expense in making sure she had a swell birthday party. As she smiled and gyrated to the rhythm of the music, crowd cheering her up it was certain she was happy. Something though was missing it was supposed to be 'their' birthday party, Kehinde has a twin brother Taye, but taye was not in the party. If people noticed his absence, they were really doing a good job of pretending not to. Later, that night I got to know why Taye had been unceremoniously absent. A day to that Saturday Chief had flatly refused to grant him his prime request of a car as his birthday gift but had gone ahead to grant Kehinde's request of the same object, and I was made to understand that Kehinde had taken sides with her father to the consternation of Taye. Consequently, he had left home that day to nowhere in particular. All efforts before the party, during and after the party to trace him had proved abortive. Even his friends denied knowledge of his whereabouts. It was no secret that Chief dotted his daughter very much even when their mother was alive; she vehemently protested such lopsided affection. Chief refuse to say why he refused to grant Taye's wish but granted it to Kehinde . As the car raced to the state command of Nigerian police, ikeja. I prayed and hoped against hope inside me that this should not be a bad Monday. In my line of work I have had cause to cooperate with the police to bring suspects to book and to defend them also. I knew, though the police might have their flaws, they don't just call a man of Chief's stature casually. Something was definitely wrong. Chiefs mobile phone rang and he slowed the four wheel drive and answered, after a minute exchange of conversation, he cut the call and the lines on his forehead deepened. I inquired if it was the police and he answered No.

He informed me how his daughter Kehinde drove out Sunday night in her car to see a friend of hers and had not returned. The call was from one of her friends he had called to inquire if she slept in their home. The rich also cry. I shook my head, as I knew of no other response that would be appropriate. At the Police station we were directed to inspector Bola's office. After the round of introductions inspector Bola informed us how one of their patrol vehicles on patrol, at about one am that Monday, had noticed a body at the side of the road opposite an uncompleted building in a secluded part of town. After searching the body, they had found Chief's complementary card. This was the reason the Chief had to be called, to identify the body. Chief and I were escorted by the inspector and a corporal to the state general hospital a stones throw from the station. As we walked towards the morgue I could tell that Chief was making efforts to face the unknown with cheerful equanimity. How can I forget? Man is nothing, absolutely nothing, except many faces of reality. He makes gain out of this false illusion we call life. We will continue to wallow in ignorance. The throaty scream, mixed with an outburst of tears and cry of anguish from Chief Tunde Adebowale was heart rendering and chilling. The lifeless body lying on the slab was the corpse of Kehinde Adebowale, his precious daugther. Chief collapsed into the ground everyone in there rushed to his aid, I remained speechless. I was later informed by the police that they suspected that she was brutally beaten and raped before being strangled to death and her car was missing. Kehinde was supposed to survive her father but she had not. He had done anything she asked just to make her happy, most times, at the expense of Taye. And here lays Kehinde as dead as a door knob. I always say that it was fortunate that a victims family were largely ignorant to what lay ahead for the remains of their dead. It was a necessary process that was not in the least designed to comfort the victim's family. As soon as we leave, a technician would enter and wheel the late Miss Kehinde Adebowale into the autopsy room. Kehinde will be weighed and have her height confirmed. She would be photographed, first fully clothed, and then in the nude. Then X-rayed and fingerprinted. A complete external exam would be conducted, with the intent of nothing and obtaining as much usable evidence and as many clues as possible from the body. Fluids would be taken and sent to toxicology for drug and alcohol screens and other testing. A Y incision would split her body shoulder to shoulder, chest to genitals. Every organ would be analyzed and weighed, her genitalia checked for signs of sexual intercourse or damage. Every trace of semen, blood or foreign hair would be sent for DNA typing. Her head would be examined, wound patterns traced. Then a saw would make an inter-mastoid incision over the top of the skull, cutting through the scalp and down to the bone. Next, the front quadrant of the skull would be cut away and the brain examined. Then toxicology would verify the contents of her stomach and traces of foreign substances in her blood and urine. The autopsy protocol would be prepared, listing the cause and mechanism of death and all relevant findings, and the official opinion of the Medical Examiner. 13

The autopsy protocol, together with all photographs, X-rays, fingerprints, toxicology reports and other information constituting the entire case file would be deposited with the IPO ( investigating police officer) and I would get another file also. This is what I get to see as a prosecuting counsel. Recently I witnessed another one as horrific as it was I could not help but ask myself WHAT IS MAN? Why would man/woman not attain a purpose for this life? Why would man continue to make excuses instead of following the path that brings him out of this illusion? Why 'can't' man brake away from this chain that continues to turn him, making him take one step forward as against two steps backward? Why is man comfortable in being used as nourishment for this earth? Does man not possess the testicular fortitude to be what he is supposed to be: A god. It makes one wonder how naked one is on the slab of the coroner. As I witness such I can only tell myself that the best thing I can do is to continue to strive to attain what is important and expedient. The next day Taye came back from his girlfriend's house in Oyo state, a neighboring state, according to him. He claimed to have read about his sister's death in the tabloids he truly appeared devastated. The police invited him for questioning. They let him go the same day, his story was water tight. Kehinde's new car was later found abandoned in the outskirt of Lagos, No clue was found in the car according to the police. As for the dead, it is over or is it not? If such life was lived in accordance with the illusion called 'LIFE' different religion tend to preach that they possess the answer to nagging questions and in pursuant of such answer some succeed others fall by the way side, some just do not care at the end, the slap of death waits.

How can I forget? Man is nothing, absolutely nothing, except many faces of reality.
What is man if he cannot happily embarrass 'sleep' knowing that he has attained and found rhythm to his life? This testimony, and my experiences have led me to find my own path, and I will sleep smiling. What about you? My name is Prince Will Collins from Nigeria 14

A commentators review. By Joseph Gitchuway The Spring 2012 edition of the Grotto Magazine hit the internet in April; conceived and directed by independent social analyst SIN JONES. This project gathers insights from individuals of different walks of life for a fresh view on social programming, occult sciences, mental constructs and the general empowerment of the human experience. Individual approach vs. socio-political or economic agencies. Siphoning perspective; for the people. In and of itself, this endeavor is difficult as we all find ourselves locked in patterns of mental programming pounded into us by the mainstream media, Governmental organizations and Heralds of popular religion. These constructs skew our vision in every facet of life. Constant influences that foster our upbringing, until we become placid sheep, accepting what is told to us. We have started to lose the capacity to question beliefs, actions and agendas. In the end Grotto: A Descent into Power was designed to jumpstart these processes again and help lead us back to a world where we are again Gods in our own right. Some of my favorite articles: Mouse to Ear: Computer mediated communications By Wayne Lee This article is an in-depth look on not only how we communicate in the modern world, but also how we dont communicate as effectively as we think. How our methods and modes of communication can get blurred and lost in a stream of not only 1s and 0s but also by general lack of inattentiveness. Wayne Lee, a man who has worked with people and communicating for about 20 years, gives insight into this much overlooked aspect of our world. The article begins by giving us a bit of insight into how he has come to understand communication in a social sense. He gives a few examples, and explains how communication works in both a an interpersonal and electronic sense. In the end he reminds us what talking, writing, reading and generally interacting with others is all about, dialogue and discourse, of which he gives a very accurate interpretation of these terms. He challenges the notion that online communication has been a major damage to our socializing skills, offering that instead it may have had certain trade-offs. He leaves us with a challenge to meet the future head on, because we basically have no choice. In essence he is completely right. Time waits for no man.

Forms of life By Steven Johnson Leyba

Single statement summation: A slap to the face, pure and simple. This article starts of in your abrupt, no lead -ins or work ups, but a straightforward disrobing of some of our most cherished and cloaked social mores. Perceptions, realization, pack mentality, death and our fascinations with it; all analyzed and flayed for us to take a naked look at. Leyba even pricks our skins by poking at one of the historically most cherished symbols of America. Though not done in an antagonistic sense, it does make a person think, the whole point in fact. He continues by prying into our perceptions of ourselves and the paradoxes of the decisions and roles that we as a society play with ourselves, the proverbial Trickster god that is so good he tricks himself. He points out that not only do we mostly live in a shadow existence, but that most people are the shadow of the shadow of the shadow. Attacking next our supposedly held understandings of reality, Leyba shows how in this age we have lost the emotional and Intellectual adulthood of society we may have once enjoyed, spiraling down into a type of mass infantilism. Although coming off as arrogant and angry, Leyba is a man who is jaded by societys perceived image and shines a spotlight on the shadows that many of us have become.

R.I.P. America by Marly Preston

If Leybas work was a slap to the cheek to wake up, this is the back hand slap on the other cheek. A small article, it is powerful none the less, giving us thought provoking dialogue on the roles we have chosen, or more truthfully, been lead to choose. Not only is this a eulogy for the spirit of America that is suppose to exist or have existed at one time , it is also a prod to resurrect that spirit starting with the individual.


Taming Primal Essence by Sin Jones A look into what makes Us, us, by the ever controversial Sin Jones. As always Sin, begins with a compelling thought process, putting what Primal Essence IS under a microscope. From thought processes to entomology, she pulls back the layers one by one. She leads us on a journey through the historical usages of terminology to arrive at what we have become to think as evil and wrong: the Primal Self. Primal Selfthe term raises connotations of fear and things to be avoided; loss of control. All of which Sin debunks, showing the in-depth care that one must cultivate to tap this Essence and bring it forth, even if it scares the uninitiated neighbors. It is not a mode of lost control or a well of fear, but power as yet untapped by the common individual. Knowledge, Intelligence, Understanding, Magic, Will-Power: These all play a role in the cultivation and eventual usefulness of the Primal Essence and the knowing of ourselves. In the end, the article is a reaching out to those who have begun the process, to those who have simply thought about it. Its a beckoning by a similar mind, not unlike a popular mythological parable set that Sin is fond of. She has become Cthulhu in her own right, mental questing and reaching out to those on or emerging on her wavelength. As Hopefully conveyed by this review, the Spring Edition of the magazine was a powerful and with any luck, well received launch of social illusion-busting missiles. Not designed to be casually read and put away, it is in its spirit a visceral felt collection of works once one gets past the obvious controversial overtones. Each article is designed to take you on a mental trip that spins your most cherished beliefs so that you see them from another view, another angle. Ones that arent always pretty or prosaic, but real and needed. In truth the magazine shows that while we may believe that in todays age, we are the most powerful we have ever, in order to progress, we may actually need to reverse course and DESCEND in order to gain power. Joseph Gitchuway

Reader review, Brian Fullem

Note from the Editor: Brian not only read the first issue but stepped up to the plate to contribute himself! Many thanks!

Wayne Lee's article on the evolution of language and "net speak" is a very well written and point-proven piece. Many of us use these same "net speak" languages and occasionally it flows over to the real world, which was a great point to say that this current trend can be detrimental to the thinking Individuals out there who use proper spelling, pronunciation, and etiquette in their discussions. I also see the point that the "emoticons" and shorthand terms are useful as well in that they save time, space, and for those using phones it means less buttons to push in conversation. The flaws and plus sides are both obvious to the observer and his points were well thought out and impressively put together. His final summary statement matches that which we all know and is a guideline that we all follow in our Paths, which is "we must evolve. We must adapt. We have no choice." I disagree with the last statement, however. "We have no choice", well, to me I see that there IS a choice. There will always be the choices that we make based on what we are, if we are survivors then yes, there is no choice but to adapt. Though there will also always be those who are not survivors, who will choose to stay as there are, in their current state of Being, and never change no matter what. This is what separates us from the humans, which we see we must change and adapt to every situation for our survival. That the age of technology has forced most of humanity into little boxes of metal and plastic doesnt mean that we have to adhere to those guidelines of, "use this or things will be harder for you, but it does mean that we have a choice. We have a choice always; we can choose to stay in the "stone age" or choose to use technology to our advantage. So cheers to you, Wayne Lee, well done!

In Steven Johnson Leyba's articles he spoke of the "shadows of being" that the drones of the "herd mentality" live all throughout their lives, i personally call them "humans" but shadows work well as they are an image without an actual definition or face of its own. The cookie cutter people with cookie cutter lives and their cookie cutter mentality of perfection, image, success, self-worth, and ideals sums up this article. He adequately describes the fallacies within the system of the blinding light of ignorance as he describes, "we live a story written by a ghost-writer, even worse we are convinced we wrote it ourselves" which is one of the best descriptions i have heard thus far on what is going on in the minds of the herd.


These people see their images on television and emulate what they want to be, too afraid to look into the mirror and find the true face of what they are looking at. It is quite disgusting how the media looks at us like children, thank you Steven Johnson Leyba for giving us that wonderful piece. Marly Preston wrote an interesting article dubbed, "R.I.P. America", now while I wholeheartedly agree with Marly;s interpretation of our plights in the ol' U.S. of A, I feel she could have expanded much more on they "who", "what", "why", and "how" of it all. Who are these globalists? What are they doing to implement these systems of control onto the populace, why are they doing this and how can we do something to stop it? Marly spoke with such conviction that I overlooked the flaws in the writing and saw her article for what is was, a person who cares very much for the people of this country and is furious at the corruption and tainted patriotism so rampant here in America. Very passionate words and summary of our oncegreat nations slow descent into obscurity, but with something like this i expected more drive to expose the truth's of it all and some kind of idea on what to do about it. Great job, though Marly Preston, I salute you and all of our Brothers and Sisters who still remember this country was founded upon a REPUBLIC.

You cant appreciate life fully, until youve looked the Reeper in the face and said FUCK YOU!
Dear Sin, I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for opening my mind, and providing thought provoking interviews, radio shows and magazine. I always learn something new and seem to agree with you on so much. Society cultivates putting kids on Drugs (my son was diagnosed with ADHD), but he is living normal life (age 19) and unmedicated) by his own choice as a non-conformist. One of my favorite quotes from you "Have the most fun while you are here!" (para-phrasing). As a cancer survivor and victim of a violent crime, you can't appreciate life fully until you've looked the Reeper in the face and said Fuck you!! Keep being you and know you have fans who love your spirit and individual mind!

Another great article from Lori Robinson with very passionate words and not much detail as to what was being referred to. It is made obvious to the reader that the world is simply no more than a virtual reality with very convincing games to keep us occupied and unthinking, again, I completely agree but with words that passionate I expect more as to the basic "who, "what", "where", "when", "why", and "how" to it all. Very well written and incredibly passionate piece of writing, thank you for that refreshing piece Lori. "Upward Spiral" by Dan Dread precisely describes the differences between RHP and LHP mentalities and values, and that the Path to the Self is just that, an "Upward Spiral". We are programmed to act as a herd or flock, and that the shepherds' way is the way to go because thats what is best for the flock. Though the flock only cares for itself we somehow have the mentality and unthinking hope that somehow we matter in the grand scheme of the herd. The Self is unimportant in the herd and in the herd, self is not in their vocabulary whatsoever. You either are, or are not, the herd. Dan Dread describes our Path as the alternative to the herd mentality and that if Selfhood is one's goal in life then one should do what is best for one's self regardless of what is best for the herd. As those that adapt to survive and survive to thrive on vital existence, we must cast aside the urge to follow and do give up our personal honor for the flock's sake. Very well put together and very descriptive with many references to his points. He expands well on the previous articles and combines the already great points given by previous writers. Great job, Dan Dread!

Danette Wilson San Diego, CA


Thoughts under the Plum TreeA Review

Gino S. Vaglivielo Temples of SatanNew Aeon

I rarely voice my opinions, but I do try my best to offer my perspective to any given subject on social platforms. Ive embarked on community project as of late, and when you step up to the plate like that it tends to drive people crazy when you dont express yourself as a deep thinker. I feel I dont fit the social stereotype of Satanic Guru. Im a pretty laid back regular guy. I do look for material that inspires me to think about social issues more deeply.

Life can be stressful, and reading is an outlet to find coping tools. If you are an intellectual, artist, free-thinker, or simply a soul-searcher Grotto Magazine will lead you to a diverse set of perspectives. I enjoyed the sample issue immensely, and its refreshing to see that there are people out there that are not buying most bullshit that most political and religious institutions are trying to force feed them.

I have read many spiritually focused magazines over the years and none really struck me hard enough to buy more than a couple copies. It seems to me that the creators dont approach subjects from different angles. One publication that comes to mind is The Green Egg Magazine. In my opinion it was spiritually focused but no real cerebral thought and thats what I was looking for. I noticed a trend in other magazines that seemed to stick to a narrow view without exploring other perspectives. To me, you have to mix it up a bit or it becomes boring. People often need to be provoked. I would have loved to see a topic approached spiritually and psychologically but what I found was much of the same.

I grew up around people both spiritually and psychologically inclined. Four members of my mothers side of the family have psychology degrees but they lack the spiritual approach to life with the exception of my grandfather. He had his spirituality, and his superstitions but he was still a man I could relate to. My neighbor was an artist and a Catholic Deacon at the local Catholic Church. So I was surrounded by a mix of spiritual and cerebral people, and these were my influences.

Access to spiritual and psychological material is limited. I suppose blending the two causes confusion and frustration for many. In fact, any attempt has received such critical review that you have to wade through the commentary to decide whether or not its something youd like to read. Theres something to be said about writing a review. I dont think people realize who they are writing that review for.

I was looking for people who think outside the box, and Grotto Magazine is a chaos ride that isnt safe for those seeking a comfort zone. In fact, its a roller coaster ride of hellish delight!




Whats Inside
Dynamic individuals come together in the Grotto to approach obstacles in Social Networking, group efforts, and keeping the momentum going.

Discovering the Authentic Outsider Tools of the Bullshit Artist Deaths Ladder Individuality What is Man? Group Efforts: What does it take? Reader Reviews Marketplace Are we merely shadows dancing on the wall?

Descend into Power