Chronicles of Bruiser Tales of a Street Sweeper

120 pages

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Chronicles of Bruiser
Tales of a Street Sweeper
Image copyright ©2007 Egadsman. All Rights Reserved.
 Chronicles of Bruiser The SomethingAwful Forums
This story is copyright ©2007 Bruiser. All Rights Reserved.
When I burned out of college in spring of 2006, I found myself needing cash in the worst kind of way. I was flipping through the newspaper when I found an ad that read:"Sweeper Vac Driver needed. 3rd shift only"and gave subsequent contact info. I'm really great doing over night work and decided that I'dgive it a shot. I arrive at the office, fill out an application, and before I walked out of the door Iwas given the job and told to report for training the following evening.So, I reported to the office the following evening... and had the weirdest/craziest/funniest 8months of my life. I was hoping to share a story or two with you guys. If you like 'em, I've gotTONS.
 Chronicles of Bruiser 
This stor
Training Day:
 Trying to make a good first imprfound a note taped to the doortrainer would be with me shortlsay "fuck it" and walk out. As Iand a dirty T-Shirt stumbled in.Hey..uh.. you Bruiser?Yeah, I've been here since-Cool... alright, well uh, lemmback to our truck and I'll meet yI walked out, found our truck, awith a bag full of stuff and sets iexplained the finer points of theWe go around to places liketrash, use leaf blowers to blow tWow, that wasn't in the job d Haha, it never is. Don't worrFNG?That's you, buddy.Mark and I got to know each othcoolest guy's I've ever met and chumor, he's kind of a , and hI got the hang of it midway thromanual labor. Happy to have sowith stuff he had seen "out therare pretty tight knit just for howroom is kind of a hazing.After a quick coffee break, we pWalgreen's dead in the center o
The Som
is copyright ©2007 Bruiser. All Rights Reserved.
ession, I showed up at 7:30; 15 minutes aheadhat told me to have a seat in the break room a. Well, 7:30 eventually turned into 8:45 when Ias heading for the door, a very unkempt mane go clock in and we'll get going. Here, take thiu out there.d did some more waiting. Eventually, the guy cbehind the seat. The guy finally introduces hi job.malls and grocery stores, use the sweeper trucrash away from the sidewalk, and empty all of escription., FNG's get the hang of the job easilyer en route to the first place we had to clean.ontinues to be a friend to this day. He's got a rd been doing the job way too the night. It wasn't hard at all, just mind-nueone to talk to, Mark kept me entertained th". He also let me in on the fact that the "Sweeshitty a job it was, and that leaving the "FNG" illed up to one of our last stops for the night. Itthe Nashville ghetto. Mark dropped me off in
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f schedule. Id that myhad decided toearing jeansstuff aroundomes back outself as Mark. Heto suck up thehe trashcans.e's one of theally dry sense of mbingly dullentire nighter Vac Guys"n the breakwas aront of the