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Focus on the Situation, Issue or Behavior not the Person Maintain the self-confidence and self esteem of others Maintain constructive relationships Lead by example
Principle Based Behavior The Basic Principles
Show Emotion; Good Sense of Humor; Spontaneous; Passionate ; Creative; Dependable; Curious; Understanding; Honest; Trust Fully; High Self-esteem; Faith-filled; Persistent; Assume No Blame or Judgment Authentic;
Authentic ... DO NOT BE ASHAMED OF SHOWING EMOTION.
• Dr Gerald Bell notes that “They (Achievers) feel without fear”.
Dr Gerald Bell Bell Leadership Institute
Good Sense of Humor ... BE FUNNY
“The Leadership Challenge”, (p.60)
• “Researchers have found that appropriate humor can lead to cohesion and bonding among co-workers.”
Leadership Challenge, Kouzes and Posner
“Achievers have fun. Their humor fits their moods and situations. It‟s not artificially buttressed by a reservoir of hostile or off-color jokes, hidden sarcasm or unreal laughter. Rather it is responsive to man‟s nature or unusual situations.”
Passionate ... TELL STORIES.
Identify an opportunity for giving recognition
Describe the behavior as immediately and specifically as possible State how the behavior made a difference to you and to the organization
Spontaneous ... PREPARE A SURPRISE.
Dependable ... OFFER A SMILE.
Curious ... BE LIKE A CHILD.
Show Emotion; Good Sense of Humor; Spontaneous; Passionate ; Creative; Dependable; Curious; Understanding; Honest; Trust Fully; High Self-esteem; Faith-filled; Persistent; Assume No Blame or Judgment
* Also Child-like Qualities
“Leading From the Heart”, Kay Gilley
“…leaders create an environment of respect for people and for the process of involving people. They know it is more important to listen than to talk.”
“The Leadership Challenge” - Kouzes and Posner
“Those leaders who take the time to listen and offer support will find it easier to mobilize action in the face of people feeling stuck, stressed, angry and alienated.”
Effective Asking and Listening Techniques
Don‟t allow outside interruptions or distractions Face the person you‟re “coaching” Keep your body language open Lean forward Maintain good eye contact Nod Give short verbal responses (uh-huh, I see, etc.)
Remain silent to allow the other person to respond Ask open-ended questions Limit your use of close-ended questions Paraphrase what the person has said Acknowledge the emotions of the person you are coaching From time to time summarize what you have heard
Effective Asking and Listening Techniques – cont‟d
Understanding ... PAY ATTENTION .
“Primal Leadership” Daniel Goleman
“Empathy allows a leader to keep people happy by caring for the whole person not just the work tasks for which someone is responsible. A leader‟s empathy makes an affiliative approach a booster of morale par excellence, lifting the spirits of employees even as they trudge through mundane or repetitive tasks.”
Honest ... COACH.
Coaching is one of the primary responsibilities of leadership. Yet many leaders find it very difficult to coach. “The reality for managers is that business goals come first by necessity. Even the most attentive managers typically turn to leadership development activities only after their „other work is done‟.
CCL Abstract; “The Leadership Imperative: “Ensuring Management Accountability for Leadership Development”.
“Primal Leadership” Daniel Goleman
• “Coaches help people identify their unique strengths and weaknesses, tying those to their personal and career aspirations. They encourage employees to establish long-term development goals, and help them to conceptualize a plan for reaching those goals, while being explicit about where the leader’s responsibility lies and what the employee’s role will be.”
Coaching Key Actions:
Identify an opportunity to help someone expand on his/her skills, knowledge and abilities. Confirm that the person is ready for coaching. Ask questions and offer information to clarify the situation. Help the person identify possible actions. Gain agreement on a course of action. Offer your support
Trustfully ... TRUST FULLY.
High Self Esteem ... BE PARTNER.
Statement to the Prudential President‟s Council, Don MacNaughton,
President, Prudential Insurance Co.
“Individuals work best and produce most when they (1) know what their job is; (2) know how it fits into the total picture and overall goals; and (3) are permitted to carry it out with a minimum of interference from anyone else. People tend to work best when they feel they are working for themselves.”,
Faithfilled ... SHARE.
Persistent ... GIVE A LITTLE PUSH.
Key Actions for Giving Feedback
Convey your positive intent Describe specifically what you have observed State the impact of the behavior or action Ask the other person to respond Focus the discussion on solutions
Receiving Feedback ... ASSUME THAT WE WERE WRONG.
Assume No Blame or Judgement ...ELIMINATE GUILT AND DENIAL.
Correcting Performance Problems
Prepare for a focused discussion State the need for improved performance Mutually assess the situation If appropriate, explain any steps you plan to take and why Help the person identify possible actions Agree on a plan and a date to follow-up Offer your support
... IS GOOD TO HAVE A FRIEND, BUT SOMETIMES LEADERS NEED TO BE ALONE...