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Boğazıçı University April 22, 2004 Tom Atkinson
Thursday, April 22: Thursday, May 6: Thursday, May 13: Thursday, May 27? Listening Skills Writing Skills Presentation Skills: Preparation Presentation Skills: Presenting
Communication Skills Overview
Effective communication skills are a critical element in your career and personal lives.
We all must use a variety of communication techniques to both understand and be understood.
Most common ways to communicate
Communication Goals To change behavior To get and give Information To get action To persuade To ensure understanding Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Critical success factor for life The majority of your perceived ability comes from how you communicate 30% What you know 70% How you communicate it Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
2004 Tom Atkinson .Listening Skills Boğazıçı University April 22.
3.Agenda 1. Summarizing and Questioning Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson . 2. Motivation How to Listen Paraphrasing.
Part 1 Motivation .
Session Objectives Be able to: Describe reasons that communication fails List strategies to improve communication Paraphrase and summarize conversations Use appropriate questioning techniques Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Listening and Speaking are used a lot… 50% 45% 40% 35% 30% 25% 20% 15% 10% 5% 0% Writing Reading Speaking Listening 9% 16% 30% 45% Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
… But not taught enough 50% 45% 40% 35% 30% 25% 20% 15% 10% 5% 0% Writing Reading Speaking Listening 9% 16% 30% 45% Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Listening is needed everywhere… Listening skills form the basis of: Continued learning Teamwork skills Management skills Negotiation skills Emotional intelligence Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
… But not practiced effectively 70% of all communication is Misunderstood Misinterpreted Rejected Distorted Not heard Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Part 2 How to Listen .
“Harry always was a poor listener.” .
What if communication were not possible? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Frustration and Chaos! Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Both children want the orange Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
neither gets what they want… Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .But without good listening.
Communication Communication is the process of sending and receiving information among people… Feedback receiver sender SENDER RECEIVER Source: CGAP Direct Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Messages not delivered due to “distortion” Feedback Sender Receiver Distortion Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
What causes distortion? Speaker Listener Language Wordiness Semantics Emotions Inflections Perceptions Preconceived notions/expectations Physical hearing problem Speed of thought Personal interests Emotions Attention span No active listening! Tom Atkinson Boğazıçı University .
What do you think about? I have something really important to tell you Maybe I should get a haircut Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
30% of you aren’t paying attention right now! .
Clues that you are not listening Are you simply waiting for your turn to talk? Are you thinking about your reply before the other person has finished talking? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
concentration and energy curiosity and open-mindedness analysis and understanding sharp focus logical thinking clear phrasing crisp delivery Tom Atkinson Speaking requires.Listening and speaking require energy Listening takes. Boğazıçı University . . . . .
How to be an active listener Set the stage Choose an appropriate physical environment Remove distractions Be open and accessible Maintain relaxed. open posture that shows concentration Reflect feelings Offer acknowledgements (say “uh-huh”) Paraphrase main ideas Interrupt to clarify Confirm next steps Tom Atkinson Ensure mutual understanding Boğazıçı University .
How to be an active listener Understand body language Observe position and posturing Make eye contact Consider expression and gestures Concentrate Keep an open mind Hear the person out Do not react to emotive words Tom Atkinson Suspend judgment Boğazıçı University .
Active Listening (not!) Behaviors that hinder effective listening Act distracted (look at your watch!) Tell your own story without acknowledging theirs Give no response Invalidate response. be negative Interrupt Criticize Diagnose what was said Give advice/solutions quickly Change the subject Reassure without acknowledgment Tom Atkinson Boğazıçı University .
Let’s practice Tell the person next to you about your Research Project Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Tell me your stories Do you feel your partner understood you? What made your partner easy/hard to listen to? Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Summarizing and Questioning .Part 3 Paraphrasing.
clarifying both your and their understanding Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .Techniques to improve listening skills PARAPHRASE Restate what was said in your own words SUMMARIZE Pull together the main points of a speaker QUESTION Challenge speaker to think further.
but let me see if I understand you correctly… Tom Atkinson Boğazıçı University . Use phrases such as: In other words… I gather that… If I understand what you are saying… What I hear you saying is… Pardon my interruption.Practice Paraphrasing Paraphrasing is simply restating what another person has said in your own words.
facts or data together. Useful for emphasizing key points and setting the stage for further discussion. your main concerns are…” “These seem to be the key ideas you have expressed… ” Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .Practice Summarizing Summarizing pulls important ideas. The person summarizing must listen carefully in order to organize the information systematically. Try out these summarizing phrases: “If I understand you correctly.
Two basic types of questions 1. reflection or an explanation. Closed questions: Get a one-word response and inhibit thought. Open-ended questions: Invite unique thought. Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson . Questions begin with who. what and how come (not why!). Questions begin with how. when and which 2.
2. 3. 5. then? Tom Atkinson 1.Practice Questioning Rephrase the following closed questions to make them open-ended: Are you feeling tired? Isn’t it a nice day? Was the last activity useful? Is there anything bothering you? So everything is fine. Boğazıçı University . 4.
Let’s practice Tell the person next to you what you did last weekend Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .
Feedback Give an assessment of today’s session What did you like most and least? Assess the verbal presentation? Assess the slides? How useful do you think this topic will be for future classes on communications? tom.mit.edu Boğazıçı University Tom Atkinson .atkinson@alum.