May 3, 2009



Need for Interpersonal Skills

Today’s work needs good networking skills.

Families stay as nuclear. Help is scarce.

Friends and Colleagues change faster.

Hierarchy is flattened so the number of your co-workers increase.

Your team interacts with other teams.

Your Boss, may be younger, more ambitious and likes to move fast.

No matter how hard you work or, how creative and brilliant you are if you can’t get along with the people who work around you, your professional life, and as a consequence, your personal life will suffer.

Interpersonal Skills
A set of behaviours which allow you to communicate effectively and unambiguously in a face-to-face setting to assist progress towards achieving an objective

Skills essential for effective teamwork are:
communicating and relating effectively, empathy and respect for the feelings and views of others, accurate self-evaluation of performance and relationships, and conflict management using active listening skills and empathy.

WHAT IS INTERPERSONAL SKILL • Effectively translating and conveying information. • Being able to accurately interpret other people's emotions.

• Being sensitive to other people's feelings.
• Calmly arriving at resolutions to conflict. • Avoiding gossip. • Being polite

Success elements in Relationships
It takes a combination of Self-awareness, Self confidence, Positive personal impact, Effective performance, Communication skills and Interpersonal competence to succeed in your career and life.

Positive Personal Impact
Do you know how other peoples see you?
When you leave a meeting or end a conversation, what impression do you leave behind? What picture do other people have of you? How do you think they perceive you? We impact on others through our opinions, the amount we contribute, the sound of our voice, the effect of our silence, the expressions we use. Personal impact is ~ Improving your posture, knowing how to shake hands properly, having good manners, looking friendly and confident.

Effective Performance What ever you do, do it to the best of your ability.

Six interpersonal skills
Applicable to almost all situations: Analyzing the situation Establishing a realistic objective Selecting appropriate ways of behaving Controlling your behaviour Shaping other people's behaviour Monitoring our own and others' behaviour

Assertiveness vs. Aggressiveness Assertiveness
~ means taking the initiative to deal with a problem in a constructive, self-protective manner. ~ Assertiveness attacks the problem, not the person. ~ attacks the other person rather than the problem. It represents a destructive desire to dominate another person or to force a position or viewpoint on another person; it starts fights that end in quarrels.


Assertive and Aggressive Communication
Assertive communication takes the listener’s feelings and rights into account; aggressive communication does not. To assert yourself is to let your communication partner know that his or her behavior is infringing on your rights.

Interpersonal Communication skills
I - statements help you express the way you feel and what you want with great clarity. “You" – statements can make others feel angry and defensive immediately. A respectful tone of voice conveys that you are taking others seriously and that you also expect to be taken seriously. Further, people with good communication skills are assertive without being aggressive or manipulative.

Interpersonal Communication skills
Eye contact is vital for good communication. Appropriate body language encourages conversation. Clear, organized ideas, specifically stated help you accurately and honestly describe your feelings and contribute to conversations and to decisions that need to be made.

Interpersonal Conflict
Conflict occurs when two people, or two groups of people, cannot agree on any point, and differ seriously. Generally conflict begins with mild differences, disagreements, arguments, disputes, and fights.

Conflict and Your Role
Professional preparation of you and others may reflect diverse philosophical and theoretical orientations. As you have to work together, as a team, to successfully undertake collaborative activities, you will need to be aware and sensitive to these differences.

Conflict Resolution
Conflict resolution involves identifying areas of agreement and areas of compromise so that a solution to the disagreement or conflict occurs.

You can’t expect all others to see the things the way you see them. What is needed is proper analysis and constructive criticism. Constructive criticism requires good listening skills and Skills of constructively criticizing.

Skills of Constructive Criticism
- Mention the good points, to begin with. - Show interest and your willingness to involve - Explain the problem and more importantly, do you have a solution for it. - give encouraging suggestions for improvement - Remember, you are criticizing the particular point and not the individual. - Do not bring out the past failures or problems and speak in the light of past experience.

Tips for resolving conflicts ~ 1
• Ensure that you remain calm and undisturbed at all times. • Adopt a non-provoking tone of voice ~ quietly, slowly, and calmly. • Listen carefully without interrupting. • Respect the other person when voicing your own opinion or point of view. • Make sure that you let the other person know that you understand them fully by asking questions pertaining to his or her own understanding and repeating what the person is saying. • Use pleasant humour if possible.

Tips for resolving conflicts ~ 2
• Try placing yourself in the other person's shoes. • Try not to be judgmental. Do not do anything to embarrass the other person. Do not accuse the other person of anything. • Make sure that your posture, body language, and tone of voice is non-threatening. • Do not take anything the other person says personally when he or she is angry, probably do not mean it. • Let the other person know that you do not want to fight, & you want to resolve the situation in a friendly manner. • Make sure that you do apologize for anything you may have said or done to offend them.

Prerequisites: Self Awareness and Ability to Understand Others Frame of Reference:
Your past experiences, acquired attitudes and beliefs, personal qualities, past and present feelings, and expectations for / from others

affect what and how you observe and perceive, and ultimately how you respond and act.

Ultimate Happiness
• Research shows that effective communication on the interpersonal level enhances the quality of your life. • Strong personal relationships, created through interpersonal communication has a direct link to invaluable physiological health.

The purpose of this presentation is to motivate you to Become aware of your communication style Improve your Interpersonal competence Reduce conflict in the workplace All these things, acting together, will improve productivity and thus increase profitability!
Surely, any objective includes productivity and profitability !


May 3, 2009


Why IMPROVE Interpersonal Skills ?

How to IMPROVE Interpersonal Skills ?

Self Promotion.
Promote yourself effectively.

Understand your strengths and learn how to express them.
[ Smile and Ask ]

Communicate effectively
Good communications are invaluable in any situation.

Be articulate, concise, enthusiastic, honest, and open.

Don't forget the other side of communicating:

This is as important as speaking.
Many people rather than listening, they spend their time thinking of the next thing they are going to say, thus taking virtually nothing in at all.


Think Creatively
Solve problems and maximize opportunities

with innovative ideas.

Follow through
Follow through on your commitments, both to yourself and others.

Record keeping
Take full and accurate notes.

Organize yourself
your thoughts, your notes, your files, your time, yourself.

Work hard for others and the rewards will come back to you ten times over.

Everyone in your life is part of your network. They can all help you and you can help them. You should learn what you can about each individual.

• Be Open. – Be open to new ideas,
opportunities and people. • Be prepared. – Learn the skills you require to network effectively. • Give just to give. – Don't give with the sole purpose of getting something back. • Ask for yourself. – If you need help, ask!

• Treat everyone as equals.

T = Think before you speak A = Apologize quickly when you blunder C = Converse, don’t compete T = Time your comments F = Focus on behavior – not personality U = Uncover hidden feelings L = Listen to feedback

Task :
Think of someone you would like to improve interpersonal communication with-in your work environment. It should be someone you interact with on a regular basis.

• 1. W ha t ki nd of wor k relati onshi p do you have with th is per so n: co op erati on , inte r depe nd enc e, ind ep end en ce ? • 2. Did/d o you ha ve the op ti on of wor king wi th hi m/he r?
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• 3. Has there been any conflict with this person? • 4. What’s the history behind this relationship? • 5. Do you feel any form of affection for him/her? • 6. Who has the power in this relationship?

May 3, 2009


• 7. What are the positive traits you see in this person? • 8. What are the negative traits you see in this person? • 9. Will you have to interact with each other for a long time? • 10. How much impact could he/she have in your present or future career?

May 3, 2009



Tips to improve your interpersonal skills

1. Set the ground for communication and align your horizon. 2. Work on your attitude. 3. Have reasonable expectations. 4. Make the right choices of timing. 5. While interacting, use your resources. Apply a variety of techniques to communication. 6. Consider the nonverbal aspect of communication.
May 3, 2009 49

1. Be the best listener you can be. Be an active and responsive listener. 3. Avoid “fire starters” such as: hot words, overdramatization, blaming, guilt induction, person and past-centered comments. 9. Choose to behave assertively. Avoid aggressive and passive-aggressive behavior. 10. Stay focused and monitor. Take your emotional temperature. 11. Reflect upon the interaction and get ready to keep developing the relationship. 12. Be ready to change and keep exploring continuously.
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Links to Prof. V. Viswanadham

• Link to Presentation slides • Link to Audio Files • Link to Blog

May 3, 2009


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May 3, 2009