Finding Out Who You Are and What You’re Looking In The Dating World


Meeting at Hope

But, more about us later…

Being single can be FUN…

But we all desire to find that special someone.

But, “If you don’t know where you’re going…

Any road will take you there”. Alice in Wonderland

How to get where you want to go…

First begins with figuring out where you are

Keirsey Temperament Sorter

Which one are you?
Act first, think/reflect later Feel deprived when cutoff from interaction with the outside world Usually open to and motivated by outside world of people and things Enjoy wide variety and change in people relationships Think/reflect first, then Act Regularly require an amount of "private time" to recharge batteries Motivated internally, mind is sometimes so active it is "closed" to outside world Prefer one-to-one communication and relationships



Which one of these are you?
Mentally live in the Now, attending to present opportunities Using common sense and creating practical solutions is automatic-instinctual Memory recall is rich in detail of facts and past events Best improvise from past experience Like clear and concrete information; dislike guessing when facts are "fuzzy" Mentally live in the Future, attending to future possibilities Using imagination and creating/inventing new possibilities is automaticinstinctual Memory recall emphasizes patterns, contexts, and connections Best improvise from theoretical understanding Comfortable with ambiguous, fuzzy data and with guessing its meaning.



Left or Right
Instinctively search for facts and logic in a decision situation. Naturally notices tasks and work to be accomplished. Easily able to provide an objective and critical analysis. Accept conflict as a natural, normal part of relationships with people. Instinctively employ personal feelings and impact on people in decision situations Naturally sensitive to people needs and reactions. Naturally seek consensus and popular opinions. Unsettled by conflict; have almost a toxic reaction to disharmony.



Last one
Plan many of the details in advance before moving into action. Focus on task-related action; complete meaningful segments before moving on. Work best and avoid stress when able to keep ahead of deadlines. Naturally use targets, dates and standard routines to manage life. Comfortable moving into action without a plan; plan on-the-go. Like to multitask, have variety, mix work and play. Naturally tolerant of time pressure; work best close to the deadlines. Instinctively avoid commitments which interfere with flexibility, freedom and variety



What it all means
Introvert vs Extrovert Intuitive vs Sensing Thinker vs Feeler Judging vs Perceiving

Artisian (SP)
Lives life one day at a time Spontaneous pleasure seekers Playful in romantic relationships Permissive as parents

Guardian (SJ)
Value experience and seek a tangible return on investments Believe in common sense, not idle speculation Are conventional and cooperative Believe everybody gets what they deserve, no more no less Follow the rules, and expect others too

Idealist (NF)
Tend to study humanities Seek careers facilitating personal growth of others Seek to promote the happiness of fulfillment of individuals and society

Rationals (NT)
Trust reason implicitly Rely on objective observations and factual analysis Seek a logical argument as a basis for action Strive to gain as much information as possible

What works well together

What works
Idealist/Rationals Idealist/Guardian Idealist/Artisians Rationals/Idealist Rationals/Artisians Rationals/Guardians

What else works
Artisians/Guardians Artisians/Rationals Artisians/Idealist Guardians/Artisians Guardians/Idealist Guardians/Rationals

What it all means


Whatever we reject in ourselves we become attracted to in a mate because that person becomes all we wish we could be.

However that becomes big trouble down the road. So…

Get to know yourself…

And then find someone like you.


Almost… Homework
Write a personal ad on the note card Give it to 3 trusted friends and ask if they agree with: Who you are, and what you’re looking for.