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Interpersonal Skills

Interpersonal
Skills
Interpersonal
Skills

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UPES-PEP-2011

What are Interpersonal Skills?

Interpersonal Skills help us


understand the intentions, motivations
and desires of other people. They allow
us to work effectively with others.

Four Types of Interpersonal


Skills
1.
2.
3.
4.

Building positive group spirit


Fostering open communication
Cooperation
Negotiation/Compromise

Quick Task: Turn to a person sitting next to


you and describe a time that you
experienced one of these four in a group
setting, either as a part of the group or a
leader.

UPES-PEP-2011

Tactful Conversations
T = Think before you speak
A = Apologize quickly when you blunder
C = Converse, dont compete
T = Time your comments
F = Focus on behavior not personality
U = Uncover hidden feelings
L = Listen to feedback
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ESSENTIAL IP COMPETENCIES
Self awareness
Control
Motivation
Acknowledging the interests of
subordinates
Communication skills

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DEVELOPING IP Skills

Developing Assertiveness
Accepting Responsibility
Managing Conflicts
Avoiding
Accommodating
Competing/Forcing
Collaborating
Compromising
UPES-PEP-2011

Dealing with Criticism

Understand the Reason behind


Empathy
Dont personalize criticism
Do not be Judgmental
Do not overload

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Building Positive Relationship

Use of I
Focus on problem solving
Dont Deceive
Empathy
Listen
Use of Praise

Be specific
Praise progress
Sincere
Dont overdo
Timing

UPES-PEP-2011

Attitude toward Oneself

Life Positions

Positive

Im OK
Youre not OK

Im OK
Youre OK

Negative

Im not OK
Youre not OK

Im not OK
Youre OK

Negative

Positive

Attitude toward Others


UPES-PEP-2011

Management Conflict Styles


Passive
behavior

High concern
for others
needs

Im
not OK
Youre OK

Accommodating
style

Assertive
behavior

Im OK
Youre OK
Collaborating
style

Compromising
style

Avoiding
style

Low concern
for others
needs

Im
not OK
Youre not OK

Aggressive
behavior

Forcing
style

High concern
for own
needs UPES-PEP-2011

Im OK
Youre not OK

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Factors Hampering
Interpersonal Interactions
Poor Listening
Emotional Arousal
Lack of Time
Differences in objective

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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis


Transactional Analysis
A unified system of individual and
social psychiatry
Focuses on the individual but also
ones relationship to others
A model for explaining why and how:
People think like they do
People act like they do
People interact/communicate with
others
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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis


Transactional Analysis
People have three ego states: parent, adult, child

Parent: when a person thinks, feels & behaves


in ways copied from his/her parents
Child: thinking, feeling, behaving as one did as
a child
Adult: thoughts, feelings, or behaviors that are
a direct result of current happenings

Key point: people shift in & out of these states


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The Three Ego States


Parent- Do as I do
Child- What shall I do?
Adult- I will be frank with you
Biological conditions are irrelevant to these ego
states.
We shift from one ego state to another in
transactions.
Parent- Why dont you prepare a time-table?
Child- What is the point when one cannot
follow it? Becomes an Adult.
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Ego Portraits
People have favorite, preferred ego state, depicted by
larger circle in a diagram
Parent
Adult
Child

P
A

A
C

C
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Types of transaction
Complementary Transaction
Crossed transaction

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Types of Transactions
Complementary Transactions: Appropriate and

Expected Transactions indicating healthy human


relationships.
Communication takes place when transactions are
complementary. A stimulus invites a response; this
response becomes a stimulus inviting further
response and so on.

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Transactional Analysis Types (I)


Complementary transaction

Supervisor
P
A
C

Employee
P
A
C

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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis


Transactional Analysis occurs when the ego states
of 2 people interacting is assessed

Complimentary interaction:
one person in a nurturing parent ego state
other person in their adaptive child ego
state

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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis

For a leader-follower, the following complementary


transactions could occur:

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Transactional Analysis Types (II)


Crossed transaction

Supervisor
P
A
C

Employee
P
A
C

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Types of Transactions
Crossed Transaction: This causes most difficulties in

social situations.
May be, you should improve your study habits.
You always find fault with me whatever I do ParentChild interaction.

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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis


Transactional Analysis occurs when the ego states of 2
people interacting is assessed, contd.

Crossed transaction:
A leader in the adult ego state deals with
A subordinate who responds from their free child
ego state with somewhat negative, rejecting input
from the leader

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Eric Berne and Transactional Analysis


For a leader-follower, there are a number of possible
crossed transactions:

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Transactional Analysis Types (III)


Ulterior transaction

Supervisor

Employee

Supervisor

Employee

P
A
C

P
A
C

P
A
C

P
A
C

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STROKES
Positive

Negative
Neutral

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UTILITY
Communication

Motivation
Leadership

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Advantages of TA:
Improves interpersonal communication
Simple to learn
Applicable in Motivation
Helps in Organizational Development
Can be used at home as well as in office

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Disadvantages of TA:
Few

scientific facts to prove


Inhibits cuteness rather than an insight
into human behavior
Ego states are difficult to define

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Thank You

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