Dealing Effectively with Personality

Conflicts and Disagreements

Mr. Kalecha ckalecha@gmail.com

Brainstorm Management Consultants Ltd. 2017
 Objectives
Discuss how to deal with personality conflicts
Respect and maintain privacy at all times
How to handle personality conflicts at work
Discuss how to deal with personality conflicts
Respect and maintain privacy at all times
How to handle personality conflicts at work
 Objectives Contd
Proven strategies for minimizing causes of conflict so
you can prevent disagreements from occurring in the first
place
How fear of conflict can hold you back personally and
professionally
Deal effectively with confrontation, disagreement,
problem behaviour, intimidation, misunderstanding, rage,
criticism, emotional blackmail and gamesmanship
Get off the defensive and prevent time-consuming
disagreements
Discover your hot buttons and develop greater self-
control under pressure

Introduction to Personality Conflicts and

Disagreements
At some point in our professional lives, most of us will have to
deal with people we just dont like or cant seem to get along with.
A clash of personalities is most likely at the root of these conflicts.

Despite our best efforts, we sometimes just cant seem to make it

work. The unfortunate result is that the quality and enjoyment of
our work suffers, and our stress levels skyrocket. In most cases
when personality conflicts happen in the workplace, the entire team
is disrupted as well.

In the end of these personality conflicts, disagreements occur

hurting the smooth operational environment of workplaces. This
needs urgent solutions and management techniques so it does not
occur in future
Introduction to Personality Conflicts
and Disagreements
Disagreements at work come with the territory but
they aren't necessarily a bad thing. Handled
properly, disagreements often can lead to
productive gains and unexpected solutions.
 Meaning of Personality
Personality-The sum of characteristics and traits that define
a person's typical thoughts, emotions, and behaviours in
over time. This personality traits can be within or
considered outside of the norms. The traits outside the
norms can be potentially harmful to themselves and/or
others leading to a personality disorder.

Personality disorders are associated with ways of thinking

and feeling about oneself and others that significantly and
adversely affect how an individual functions in many
aspects of life
Different Types of Personality Conflicts
Work style
Background
Attitude
Competitive versus cooperative
The Flyer
The Gossip
The Blamer
The Control Freak
The Victim
The Quiet Type
The Passive-Aggressive Type
The Paranoid One
The Narcissist
The Psychopath
 Work Styles and Background Differences
Work Style Differences
People work in different ways. Some people work quickly,
completing their tasks as soon as they are assigned, while others like
the rush of waiting till the deadline is looming or need to be
supervised. Some like to work on what appeals to them first, while
others prefer to work methodically down their checklist from step to
step.

Background Differences
Gender, Ethnicity, Social economic status, Political views, and
religious backgrounds too cause people to view situations with
different perspectives. Our perception is in large part determined by
our personal experiences and beliefs. These differences in
perspective have a major impact on how we interact with others.
Attitude Differences
cynicism, arrogance, and irritability all contribute to an attitude of
negativity. A negative attitude interferes with effective communication. If
you are a naturally upbeat, optimistic type of person, you may have
difficulty dealing with someone with negative attitude. Some people
constantly complain, looking for flaws, while others look for the positive
and focus on finding solutions. This makes collaboration extremely
difficult.

Competitive and Cooperative differences

Some people feel the need to compete and compare constantly, while
others seek to cooperate and work together, rather than against each other.
Its very difficult to work with people who are condescending, petty,
posturing, and aggressive. The constant attitude of undermining and one-
upmanship can be very draining. When the competitive attitude is taken to
extreme, it can result in intentional sabotage, which puts the other person
in a perpetually defensive state.
The Gossip
A common difficult personality type found in many office
environments is "the gossip. People like this get their title from
talking about other people (often behind their backs) and spreading
rumours about others (which are oftentimes untrue or exaggerated
versions of the truth). If you have ever found yourself in a
conversation with the gossip at your office.

The Blamer
Blamers constantly shift responsibility away from themselves and
onto others whenever things go wrong in the office. For sure, there
are times when most of us find ourselves pointing the finger at
someone else when perhaps we were the cause of a situation or
problem. Rarely do they acknowledge or apologize for their own
misgivings, mistakes, bad decisions, or poor performance. And
oftentimes they stretch the truth in order to convince others that their
version of events is accurate and factual even when it's not.
The Flyer
The flyers are highly emotional and may "fly off the handle" at any time. They
may also be called the "drama queen" or "drama king" and are very emotionally
reactive people. Such people may have traits of histrionic personality disorder
even if they do not have the disorder itself. They show a pattern of excessive
emotionality, attention-seeking, need for excitement, flamboyant theatrically in
speech and behaviour, and use of exaggeration to maintain largely superficial
relationships for the purpose of getting emotional needs met.

The Control Freak

This guy often nit-picky and critical of others who do not do things their way.
Such people may have traits of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) even if they
do not have the disorder itself. They often feel the need to control the outcome of
seemingly everything and everyone around them and may even step over
appropriate boundaries and attempt to control situations that aren't relevant to their
own job duties. They may also be perfectionists and have impossibly high
expectations for themselves and others. However, they may be a valuable asset to
your company or organization due to their high attention to detail.
The Victim
This is the person who is often a constant complainer and attempts
to draw people's attention to their problems every day. For
example, they may complain about their work duties and try to
convince everyone that they aren't treated fairly and have more
work than everyone around them. Or they may play the victim
when something goes wrong and claim that they were left out of
important conversations.

The Quiet Type

They are often easy to pick out in an office. This is normally a
confusing one. The person is usually aloof in the office, may sit at
their desk a lot, and may close themselves off to others by hiding
behind their cubicle, keeping their office door shut, or wearing
headphones.
The Passive-Aggressive Type
Passive-aggressive types can make very difficult coworkers to interact with,
as they may not be as easy to spot as others and can do real damage. They
hide their true feelings by pretending everything is okay when they're
actually upset - and have a tendency to appear calm, cool, and collected at
all times since they keep their negative feelings pushed deep down.
However, a classic sign of this type is the fact that they may do things to
sabotage the work or performance of others, or get revenge in other stealthy
ways (e.g., stealing someone's lunch).

The Paranoid One

The paranoid coworker is often portrayed on popular TV shows and in
films, as this type can be equally entertaining and frustrating to deal with.
These include being constantly suspicious of other people and their
motives, distrusting other people, and interpreting the behaviours of other
people in very negative ways (for example, "She did that because she's out
to get me fired!")
The Narcissist
Such people can also be described as egomaniacs and are often found within the management levels of
many companies and organizations. They may show traits of narcissistic personality disorder or even
have the disorder itself. They show a pattern of grandiosity, entitlement, need for admiration, lack of
empathy for others' feelings or opinions and expecting unearned high praise regardless of their actual
effort or accomplishment. Also evaluate their own work performance more favourably than it is in
reality. They may be arrogant, annoying to deal with, and disliked by many people. Conversely, they
may be very charismatic and actually liked by many coworkers. However, they can be toxic to the
workplace and will attempt to control situations and gain support for their inflated self view regardless
of how it may damage those around them or their relationships.

The Psychopath
The psychopath falls under the abnormal psychology branch and a regular encounter with someone who
suffers from this is rare, nonetheless, it does happen and the psychopath can be a very harmful type of
person particularly in the workplace. Such people may have traits of antisocial personality disorder even
if they do not have the disorder itself. This personality disorder is defined by a pattern of disregard for,
and violation of, the rights of others. People who are psychopathic have a tendency toward intentional
harm toward others including lots of deceit and manipulation. They may take the credit for work done by
others at their company, purposefully deceive others in order to "win" even if their actions are very
damaging, unethical, or even illegal, or act in other reckless and predatory ways like stealing from the
company or the company's clients. The good news is that true psychopaths are a rare breed, composing
only 3.3% of adults within the general population.
Consequences of Personality Conflicts and
Disagreements
Personality conflicts exist, thats a fact. Its important
however, to realize that there can be serious consequences
when personalities clash, more often, disagreements that
affects workers in various ways occur. These include:
Stress, Conflicts and Incivility
Creation of negative workers wellbeing
Lower Productivity
Poor or Ineffective Communication
Inability to quality-focus on customer service delivery
Creativity and Innovation time wasted
Others
 Handling Personality Conflicts and
Disagreements
Your way is not always the right way, and your
personality is not necessarily the normal one.
Except that, people have different perspectives. All are
valid.
Different personalities, if handled correctly, can
strengthen a team by contributing different ideas and
solutions.
When personality conflicts have reached the point where
they interfere with the ability to work, its necessary to
deal with them.
 Handling Personality Conflicts and
Disagreements
Acceptance
Listen
Stay professional
Find the source
When necessary take it to management
Separate yourself from your position
Recognize and avoid "straw man" arguments
Agree to disagree
Watch what you say
Use a lower voice
Try to see the other person's point of view
When the disagreement is resolved, put it behind you
Others
THAT IS THE END,
THANK YOU VERY
MUCH