Guy tells a story from inside his new car. I give him money.

He tosses it to the curb, he asks the next guy for money and I go pick up my gift change he tossed, next guy tells him to fuck off, he drives past me asking, what is with your outfit? I told him I am a kids clown and he drove off. Was going to let my sisters roommate borrow my car but it broke down the night before I flew to Europe. Been here in Switzerland one week. Suzy was waiting for me at the airport nervous/excited/stressed. We visit a few of her friends in a blast go to her home, meet her family and all is wonderbar! We then go to a party where I learn to speak German and see Zurqu! Amando! Supa Show! We also go to one of her friends BBQs where all the swiss tell me their country is great, as they hate all the things I notice about them. We swim in lake, get little sleep as we take trains and long walks home. Then off to kids camp. No rest, no slow times, no diary, no internet. Fun! We raft, kids love me, Rito is boss and liked me till he realized I dont understand what he says, and I just figure it out with my eyes. Swativa (Police Zurik) dos the same me when I speak English. Only 3 kids speak English words (none form sentences) and they teach me German words. But for the most part I work as a perf mute helping what I see and treated like I am useless for I cant be given instructions. Suzu is stressed, I get sick and she wants space. Police arrested me in Zurich for smiling? Suzy went off to camp without me and left me with her friend but she had a guy with her and he did not like me so they said they would meet me at noon. I arrive 15 minutes before without SIM for my phone and I am trying to get Surfen working on my phone. I ask 2 groups of people for help but they didnt understand English so I work on my phone. 5 minutes later as I am sitting down typing on my handy, police ask for my passport. I happy hand it over and ask if they know Swativa. They say, Stop, smile clown. After they see my passport is good I say, Dunkashen but they dont give it back. I say, Das goot but they look at me like they want to get something else on me but I am too clean. They take my arm I ask, Was ist los? As they start taking me away I yell, Hiefe? Sprechen Di English? Does anybody speak English and Dutch? Help! Willkomen to Zurich. In the police station the police finally started speaking

to me, in English even! They said, We understand English, we no like you ask help loud. I told them their silence made me think they didnt understand I was sorry didnt mean to offend, but got scared when taken for no reason. Police say I was begging for money. I insist I was not, police insist I was. I say, You saw with your own eyes what I was doing; I was sitting typing on my phone. Police say, We got call you beg, you know you beg, no lie, why would man lie? I keep insisting, never stop. Police find movie money from a USB commercial I was in months ago in Los Angeles. $500 euro note with word fake written on it. They say, This is copious. Did you print this? I laugh and tell them monopoly money, kids board games, I cant print something like this. They say we are going to send this to Bern and save your fingerprints, you may go to jail. In shock I take they bill and say, for this?! and casually explain, we get these for pennies in the US as I rip up the bill and toss in rubbish. They photocopy my passport, put some info in a computer, tell me I am banned from Zurich for 48 hours and I have a warning in system so not to cause more trouble or I go to jail. 10 minutes after noon I wait for my Swiss girlfriends friend Eschi. Dont see her so I leave. Afraid to ask Swiss people for help and angry tears roll down my face as I feel immigrant prejudice in my purple pants and green shirt. No matter what cultural differences, fear of people not like us is universal. Talked to girl from Mexico. Told me of her brisk Europe plan failing due to laws, permits, etc. Told me people street perform at lights, no permits, no problemo, in Mexico. Said East Europe cheap, West Europe expensive. We talked for over 20 minutes for we were both glad to share a common fluent language. I also shared a new respect our Mexican neighbors, understanding of experience. Am running out of geld. Everything is so expensive here. Suzu wants me to go to this trance fest but I am afraid if I do, I may run out of money before Sept. I miss Suzu. She went off to camp and I stayed in the city for we both agreed she needed a break from me. For me I was in a new place with my love but she was in her daily grind with a grown kinder to care for and the translating taxed her mind and time. I spend my time setting myself up with bank account, phone, talking with Suzus mom and

people asking for directions and help. I take rocket German on the computer. Spend more time on FB updating back home. I miss Suzu. With her gone, I also miss LA. Hung out with Eschi the last 2 days. She is wonderbar! She had me ask what time it is in German. She showed me free bike rentals, she played chess with me in the park, and her mom made me the best bort beet soup I even had! We saw the street musician in Zurich, saw my ninja video, laughed a lot. She showed me the swiss are not all quiet and annoyed. She convinced me to go to Summer Never End s even though I am running out of geld fast. Plus I really really miss Suzu and everyday I am not with her makes me think why am I here for she was my reason for coming. Super Uber Mega Wonder Bar Swiss hippies had me stay at their place as we talked politics. A drunk chick came up to us and I realized she was same as USA drunk chick only she speaks German. Summer Never Ends was great. Suzu was sleepy; Eshi crafty and we all hang in drug free tent. Did some performing on the street. Linking rings and making balloon animals and blowing bubbles on the bus. All outside of a migros or coop (I forgot which one). Kids asked wat kostes das? I said gratis but parents still gave me 2-franc coins! Thats like $2.25 USD! Just an hour in this random place in a random city and I made almost 5 franc or over $6 USD. Suzu gets mad at me like Deidre got mad at me. Her friends like Eschi almost make her late for work and serious things but she doesnt mind but if it looks like I am about to make a minor mistake she gets really upset as if I actually did something wrong. For example I am ready before her but she feels like I am the dead weight and that she has to worry about me. She does not hold Eschi up to these same standards and would never treat Eschi the way she treats me. Suzu is no longer sexually attracted to me. Although I am nice to have around at times, she mostly gets stressed for she feels responsible for me and she already has enough to worry about with kids camps, leading student unions in France, looking for a place to live and setting up for University in Bern. When she was a world traveler in that mode we made the best lovers, but now that she is settling down I

may not be what she wants in a lover, I think she is wonderbar so it gets harder for me to face it, but we are hopefully going to be great friends, only the transition is touch and made tougher by the help I need as a stranger in this strange land. As Suzu is not only the reason I came, but the only person I know. Just took a rainbow hike with Suzus dad Peter and a bunch of 6-year-old kids. They all got naked and swam in the river! Peter was even taking photos. This culture shocked me but I joined in too in my underwear. Trains. Suzu dumped me. I cried, a lot. Then we had a superfun time orienteering! Suzu and I were an awesome team. Problem solving and brainstorming it was wonderbar! The next day they filmed me doing my mission solo. I was the fastest competitor from one post ($3 to $4) to the next and I placed in the middle due to my wize routes. At camp I hung with the kids and did a show with my hat and jacket. Suzu taught me to swim better in the cold lake and before all this we were in Bern!! Bern was awesome! Suzu had me along and was already done with me as she goes to hang with Eschi in Bern. I play in the fountain and when Eschi comes we float down the river and jump off high cement diving platforms into the free swimming pool in Bern! We are joined by some girl that cant speak English so Suzu, Eschi and Swiss punker just go German for the next hour as I buy bread and they head to Starbucks. I depart for adventure and find happy to be back old lady who helps me a ton. I go in circles and it is annoying at first but then I know my way around! Helpful traveler gives me a tip about keeping backpack in sight or between legs. I then rent a FREE BIKE!! I bike around Bern then meet Suzu to head back to Chur. Only after Bern does the idea of hitchhiking and couch surfing Europe starts sounding like a fun adventure. The next days I dream of French mimes, Dublin and London buskers, masked clowns in Italy, and I plan, plot and internet info my way into the world of backpacking Europe. Nothing graceful about me falling into grace. I stumble a broken mess. But with pain comes healing, and sometimes it gets messy for a moment as your cleaning house. Out of fear we sin but it is love that brings us closer to God and each other.

I returned the call from the hospital. Told them I wanted to pay the account of Mick Dane. Gave them Nick Kanes bank account info. They asked many questions, I only answered that I wanted to pay the account and make things right. The lady said it would take a week for payment to process and this made me nervous so I got off the phone and prayed that all goes well for all. I tried hitchhiking. Did not go well. Many drivers made signs at me I didnt know what they said but later on not read they were gestures explaining they were staying in town/not going far. People seemed to like the puppet grandpa was holding the sign. I did my research and picked the best spot, made eye contact, smiled, danced, had a sign, even a puppet but nobody picked me up. I felt what every person projected. Love, hate excuses, eye contact is universal communication and connection. Gave hitchhiking a 2nd try. Picked a better location or ramp to the highway and made sign much bigger. I got a new offer every 8-12 min. None where I wanted to go. I tried hitchhiking to Bern but had to buy a train ticket. I feel like I am getting better. I got a small crush on Danielle K first girl I couch surfed at. I think she took note and didnt like it so I kept it to myself. Her roommate thought I was a blast. I blew bubbles, danced on the stripper pole they had in the living room and gave my host a short massage. In the morning I walked to Bern with her and started doing shopping for needed things but soon she didnt want me, and left. Talked all day with a guy looking for a job. We talked about great American qualities like risk taking. A group of boy scouts pass and I put on my boy scout outfit and the swiss scouts are confused. My friend laughed. My 2nd couch surf took me to Buskers Bern. One of the first things we do is see the pantomimes. I realized I was in Europe watching real pantomimes and I started to cry. Michel and his wife treated me the whole time and were great hosts letting me see what I wanted and just going along and helping the adventure. Went to the ghetto of Bern and met a girl from Germany. She was traveling with her brother Alex. Her name Anita.

The way she spoke made me realize I understand Swiss better than German. Them together made me realize I would love a travel friend. The small crush I was getting made me realize my heart was ready or open, even wanting and hungry for love. Just a friend to share the moments with. At dinner I ate my food and didnt look at people. The high German dropped my understanding level down from my normal 10% down to less than 5% so I gave up but that was a rude move. I later realized even if I dont understand any of it I should look at the person talking and follow the conversation with my eyes and body language. If I do people sometimes explain if I dont. I look rude like a teenager that doesnt talk. Was a miracle I made it to Slawer Bower. I get bus/train info from girls at Starbucks then Christians for me and give me food. Little kid gives me candy. helps me find transfer Columbia lady turns my change paper bills at a profit to me for my cleaning. friendly hippies give me ride to fest drop me off near I follow guys and get to my shift 5 min early (just in for swiss diet). the pray Guy into Then door time

At the fest Suzu hangs with Eschi. I help in kitchen and play with kinders. Cirque does a rabbit chase stage move trick. At one point I let the kids pick on me till I started crying for real. Most stopped but amazingly some still picked on me! Another time I fought back. If a kid gave me a wedgie I gave them a flying atomic wedgie. If a girl tossed straw at me of stuffed it in my underware, I covered her in water and then covered her in straw. At first it made the kids mad but then after some cool off and think time, it got their respect. All the kids loved me. Was helping a girl my age do acro. Guy that spoke German came, saw us, started doing the acro with her, and she never came back. Finally no longer want Suzu as a girlfriend Still want her as a friend. She is having trouble sleeping so I took a walk to the Kapfnach bus stop and am penning my thoughts. Suzu played an important part in my life, just as Anna Jackson did. I am glad we tried and got to know each other fully. The good and the bad. But just as the time came were tait and Anna had to part and who

Anna became was no longer a symbiotic creature in relation to who I became, I am no longer doing Suzu any good so it is time to say goodbye until we both become different people who can help each other learn and grow and love again. Was inspired by the performers I saw. The best ones did not use words, but still used audience members. Did the first day busking for theater in Zuri. The buskers were competitive and those pretending to be friendly were the meanest of all. They dont like newcomers so (I think) they (may) give them false info. Either way I setup with roll of tape, flying stick, big puppet, linking rings, and puppets and coat friend, and ninja with volunteer. I didnt do any order and I did non-stop asking for donations via mime. Dont know what I made yet but fun so I return tomorrow. Spent the eve with bone Niki after thrift stop jackpot! Got a new green hat, buzzer bell, cane, nifty shirts, boom box. Lots of street performance stuff. With Niki we go to the lake where I dance with confused strangers, eat swiss next from migros, I fetch pou and we try pou-moves. Spass! Banholf clowon. Performed for kinders on the train. Was blessed to be a part of a special childhood memory for 2 girls in particular. Day one 63 fr and 3.40 euro! On day two I gathered crowds and had my act more together and made 180! At the end of day two everybody was mad at me. One guy complained to the fest that I make noise during my mime act. Another did not like that I do not take a break. None of the other performers were friendly and only one was neutral. Every day that followed (till today) I made very little. Sometimes as little as 10 rapper. I would be in a spot first and another performer would want it and I would move. I stopped my noises I did everything they asked. One day they even flat out asked me to go home, and I did. Outside of performing for fest I have been a train station clown for kids this was a blessing till a buss driver did not let me on. I cut him off mid-route and put my luggage in the road to make him stop and when he stopped I went to the window and he drove off again. When I went back to the bus station another bus driver thought I was loitering (for I waited an hour for

the bus to not let me ride) and told me I must leave or he will call the polezi. There is nothing worse than an egotripped authority figure that doesnt have the ability to hear your side of the story. I walked home crying because I realized I dont have a friend in (this half of) the world. Not making much money made me feel worthless. I had a great day watching this guy with a rope, a roll of tape, a newspaper, and volunteers (motorcycles). I didnt lose money but I made very little compared to yesterday and compared to how much I could have made if I was allowed to play with all the kids that wanted to play with me! I had kids that wanted to play and it killed me that I could not play! The other performers came over and asked that I join the hat and take a timeslot with the big major street shows and not work the other times. I did, and although the money is terrible the healing is great. I cam not for geld but for experience and I am hurting but growing and learning. I do not know what I am learning yet but I feel a change. Right when I was ready to say no and I could not be pushed around, when I no longer cared about trying to be their friend, they made a friendly diplomatic request and it moved my heart and I found myself enjoying the love I got but no longer needing it. A busker told me Paris was serious money, but Amsterdam was the friendliest. I am gathering info and my mind is preoccupied with travel plans and city dreams. My favorite past times are being a banholf clown (every night a new show) and counting my busk money. One night an English only speaking girl talked with me for hours till the cops came and made us leave the street. Another old lady asked if me she could sit then told me about her husband dying. The next day she forgot who I was and the day after that died. The mormon man gave me bread and thanked metoo many stories. I made balloon animals in the rain. It was beautiful. At the days end the girl in the box complained to be. We 1st meet days ago. She setup her box. A kid put a coin in, pressed the button that said Romeo and Juliet, she handed me a script in German and kids laughed as I said all the words funny. That was then and now she grumps but remind her that any money is good money for we do not do this for money but for love. Then tango music plays. She says she dances tango and I dance tango with her in the rain by the

sound of the live musicians on the other side of the bridge/lake river under the glow of the festival lights. Tango turns into contact improve and acrobatics. Fall in love and she tells me she cant take me home for her ex is staying with her. I am in same boat. I go to her station and jealous break-dancers tell her I was with another girl but she does not let them bother us. We kiss goodbye not knowing if this was a dream or the start of a. I tried to clown at the swiss hospitals. Hargen, Zuri, even hospitals for kinders would not take m and my german swiss clown friend. Eventually we went to the hospital his mom was at (nursing home). His mom did not recognize him. I started performing for the 4 old people there. Soon they were laughing, my clown friend started crying and then filming me and the staff brought more old folks out to see the show. I then handed it over to him to perform. He spoke their language and soon after his mom knew who he was, I filmed him for a moment, gave his wife the camera and left. I see Juliet/Johanna for a sleepover. It is simple, nice, fun and she was inviting but I was sleepy and slow to advance to deep and far (for now). My last memories in Zurich are a chocolate factory stage show and a kids party. The stage show made me cry for there were very specific swiss cultured jokes and symbolism that I understood and felt too (differences in swiss german and fat lady angel butterfly). The kids ruined most of my things and misbehaved but the kids had a good time and parents were still impressed and tipped well even though it was chaos and I had very little control. After I tried to go to a contact class and I meet an sup girl at a bar patio outside area. She only spoke German so her friends translated for her and I, but she had very offensive views and has not traveled. I told her of what happened to me and I used the fact that she would think I am tricking her to illustrate my point even further that the experience of outsiders is less quality then of native swiss due to fear/culture. I try to go to dance class and as I wait I say hello to people at an outside bar and they love me and I found myself giving an impromptu performance. They love it and even though I did not ask for money they took my hat and passed it around and I got a 10-chf note and 4 fr! I came back to the bar a few min later to try to change small coins to less but bigger but when I was just chatting with

a guy a girl said go away or I will call Polezi in swiss. I did not understand anything. Save for her anger and the word Polezi. I go my horgen home for the last time in a long time, and langers mom gifts me a 100-khf note 9 hours b4 I go to Paris. I cry for I am leaving my swiss mother, maybe forever. Days go at Zurich I saw a man who was tired and alone. I knew he was traveling by the size of his backpack. Shortly after passing him my heart felt compelled to help him so I went back said hello and gave him the food I was going to eat. We talked and he turns out to be a filmmaker in Paris! He invites me to be his guest and days later I arrive In Paris moments after arrival, a man sells me a ticket for public transpo, but it is fake. Then a girl acts deaf wants me to sign a clip board. I sign back but she doesnt understand sign language and leaves. I see them scam somebody and nearly pick their purse. As I am going on my way to tell the police a man asks me for 2c. I say, I need 2c! He tries to sell me drugs I say no and start walking away. Then he says give me 2c or I will rob you. My lips said no but my eyes said fuck you. It was that moment that I learned to be street wize. I find the police and tell them about the scams and before I even finish they say, we know. We are literally watching it happen as we talk about it! I ask, arent you going to do something about it? And they shrug their shoulders. As I walk away, they say, they are under 18. Coming from Zurich where they arrest you for smiling I am in full blown culture shock! Let it be, Liassez Faire. (Statue of) Liberty came from France. Paris is diverse and the people dress well. I meet a girl on the subway and I ask if I can walk with her and go where she is going for I do not know what I want to do and right now I want to talk to you.. She invites me into her home and makes me French food. Simple but tasty, with desert too! Tells me she is an actress and she used to live in London. After I part from her I stumble into a group of high schoolers who think I am awesome and they have fun teaching me French and watching me mess it up as I practice. August was the man from Paris and he welcomed me into his

home and loved me. Excited to show me Paris life, he insists that I stay in Paris longer and make myself at home in his. We go out with his friends and there is a couple having a hard time with cultural differences and a film industry guy from LA. It was like God wanted me to look into the mirror and see what I look like to others. I need to leave Paris now. The tiefs have upset me in a real bad way. I have gotten street wise so I am not a victim. But I have seem them do horrible things that destroy people in a way deeper then money loss. Happy tourists ready to friend and trust are taught an evil lesson that you cannot trust people. Justice floods my brain and I dream of robbing thiefs but forgiveness and the light of focusing not on negative, but good and love is what I hope to exit Paris with. People where smashing shaving cream pies and tossing flower into people at Notre Dame. I took off my shirt and joined the fun. I found the most amazing corsets and dresses in this bin thrift shop in Paris? Was going to go to the dress rehearsal and see the magical girl that I meet one day one act in a stage show but there was a man from Sri Lanka who only spoke tamil so my phone didnt even translate! He was at the tolly wrong station on the opposite side of town so I helped him get where he needed to go. Took me hours and afterwards I cried. I meet a guy from Egypt who showed my many night Paris sites. Was nice to journey with a friend. When I was alone at the Eiffel Tower I cried then talked to some teens. Then did some mime. This black guy from Paris got offended at me. I could not understand his words but he got close his lower lip quivered and his eyes looked both angry and like he was about to cry. So I apologized and mimed away. Met two girls from Joberg(?!). They said that there is high demand for directors in South Africa. They made it sound like it was easier to film in Africa then LA?! Last days in Paris really let me love the city. There were riot cops so I went to see what was up and there was a Revolution protesting Christians or people trying to shoot

down planned parenthood. I felt for both sides. French people told me it was illegal to pray in the streets?! Big techno parade people were climbing bus stops, street lights and I even did some crowd surfing! Paris ends well and I meet Saudi chicks waiting for London. As I enter UK they ask me questions and make it sound like they are not going to let m in?! They do but give me a Zurich warning. I go to sperkers park and tell my carjack story. I got the idea from a speaker who was doing a stand-up comedy street act. I meet a London punk rocker near the eye and hung out with graffiti artists on the south beach. Soon I decide I have seen enough and go to the Hackney part of town where I meet two hot mixed chicks and a black hackney that takes me to his mums house. His mom is very British. She even offers me tea and biscuits. We talk American life and she enjoys it much. At the London underground club I made a ton of friends but have to go early cuz tube stops soon. A drunk talks to me. I talk back in my best London accent but he does not like it. He realizes I am his only friend right now so he forgives me fast and continues to ramble. We both part and wink knowing. I get to the train to the ferry 10 min too late. My own fault. I left all my money with LAX thinking I would not need it anymore but found myself begging for pounds. The ferry I meet some punks. together. Clown some kids, and go

I arrive in Dublin and a girl helps keep me company. She brings me to the spipe at dawn, sings me molly mallone and part. After that I find myself on OConnell and a young undergrad thinks I am awesome and takes me with her to her college outside the city center and asks her teacher if I can teach the class some tricks but teacher is not having it so I wait for her playing a cat and mouse game of dont stay too long in one place at the school. She exits, I perform for her friends then bus back to city center. I am so tired I think of getting a hostel but I find trinity college and I take off my giant heavy bag and lock it to a post in the open air commons where all the clubs have their booths of info, trying to get all freshmen and join for 3c or so. I meet a buy who makes balloons, I learn irish

politics, but when I return to my bag it is gone! I panic for all my everything from passport, to phone, to c, to eurail ticket, even my diary that I am writing in right now. I climb the highest thing I see and announce, my bag was just stolen, it was locked to soon a girl tells me the police took it so I go to the campus police, they scold me about N. Ireland protestant/catholic terror bomb, etcI take my broken bag (no way to look it they have all locks) and follow the masses of students in the direction they are walking. I go into the lecture hall and it is a prep for international students. There are many catch 22s such as the immigration not letting them have student visa fill they prove student status and no enrollment till student visa. Plus the people had to have proof of financial of c5,000 but the person helping thought they only had to prove c1,000. The experience of the immigrants and outsiders was different then what the admin believed and not even the real lifes of the people in front of her face could change those beliefs, even though she wanted to help. I exit the building the lecture hall was in and a cop gives me hell about use the main entrance, I comply but he tries to give me more hell for nothing, show me your ID I just say I am an international student and I dont have my papers, sorry and plead nicely as I go away. I try to go back to where the clubs have info tables but another cop stops me, at first I keep walking thinking it will stop but he comes to me and tells me about how much hell my backpack has been, how he nearly killed himself cuz when he tried to remove it he made a fool of himself for to his surprise it was chained and yanked him back making him a laughing stock. He was pissed and wanted me to lose my cool but I didnt so he kicked me off campus. I was real when I said, sorry I mean no harm, Im just trying to fit into the culture. He said, I know, I have traveled too, but if I see you and your bag again youre getting beat! My first night in Dublin is Arthur night, celebrating Guinness. My host Martuska takes me out to the hot spot in temple bar where all the people are in the street chatting it up. I get drinks bought for me that I give away or set down and I meet a ton of people eager to friend and give me their contact info. Martuska was wonderful and even flirty in a cat and mouse way.

My 2nd night in Dublin was culture night! I kick it with her friends and I start to feel the city. We walk in on Trevor signing about a midget and a ho and it becomes the running joke. The place I am staying at was broken into. They came through the window without breaking glass but by kicking the window in, breaking the cheap window locks. The insurance company says they will not pay for they must have left window open for glass was not broken even though foot prints on window. Her mates work computer was stolen, makes her look bad to the company. Business and heard a noise inside. I told a nearby taxi about it and he checked it out and called the cops. I did some street performing. The buskers were kind and helpful, the cops did not mind, and the shop owners even liked it! An employee came and asked if I was going to be long. Thinking they wanted me out, I started packing, but then she said, cuz I texted some friends to come see you. We are doing a play with clowns and want you to teach us to help us! I arranged to teach a workshop with them tomorrow. Next a different shop owner/security/shop welcome person comes up to me to tell me I do a great job! First place I went to in Amsterdam was Casa in Bon Ets Lommer. Fine place. I rang the bell and the thing said to me over the intercom. There is a note here that says, I suck your head I respond OK. The buzzer buzzes me in. There is an open door. As I walk to it, it slams shut? I knock, it knocks back. I say, I am here for the torture room (the email I got said the name of my room was the torture room). The door opens, shuts! Next open I put my cane in the door, and put my art on my arm to look like a snail. The man behind the door open wide lets me in says, welcome. He looks at me, listens, soon likes me, we play at a park with Rafael and other casa kids like me. The next few days I get riddles and figure it out as I go. A newspaper covers the house and does article on dumpster diving, takes photos of me, and T-Mo. I buy a bike and become an Amsterdam lock. I even cuddle with a Dutch girl and street perform. Great place. I ride to bad, with a Canadian and a world citizen that hate on Americans the whole time. The more persecution without reason the more I hold on to my culture.

At the casa there was a book where people write. I tell Robin that I do not have a place to stay he tosses me the book and tells me to write in it before I go. I open it to a page a girl named Jazz writes in. She wrote her info and invited me to stay in Berlin with her. I contact her but get no reply for days so I stay at a hostel and stay with a guy I meet on the bus. He takes me out to the coke fest and his roommates girlfriend flirts with me. A guy keeps calling me offering to suck my dick if I stay with him but Jazz calls, I bring her a rose and we begin. At the gas station there are other hitchhikers already there. I clown around and it wakes them up and Jazz gets us a ride to south Germany. The guy gives us $50 euro 3 drops us off at the train station. I then find us a ride to Venice from this place but she takes this place and wants to leave now. Plus she does not want to call the ride I found for us to Venice, plus she does not want to call her friend who lives in this town who we were supposed to stay with. She is stressed out, does not want to do anything nor wants me to do anything so we wait out till she is tired of being paralyzed by stress. Then she finally calls the ride I found us to Venice. It was at this point I think we may have been better in Berlin or maybe we should part after we reach Roma. I then see a kid and start street performing. Our ride takes us to Venice and it is raining when we arrive. We spend the first part of the day trying to find a hostel but she hates it when I talk to strangers so we get nowhere. I start to think I may have been better off alone and I make a friend despite her rule and he takes us to Margarita Campos the main chill area and I start to street perform mimicking people around me. A guy with a drum stops and starts to play a soundtrack to my performance. He then invites us to rest at his home, eat his food, tells us stories of rainbow gatherings and takes us out to local party in the night with drums and police shooting them down. We get to the train station and it is closed? We and many others are confused for it is 2:53am and we all have a train ticket to Rome at 3am. We all sleep outside the station with the homeless. We arrive Roma sleep deprived (2 days) and hungry. On the train we have a great conversation about finding similarities in cultures rather then differences and connecting rather then separating the us from them. Jazz

then complains about an Italian and I mention the conversation, but she is too sleepy to understand. She then makes fun of my security fears of losing my diary if my bag is stolen. I snap, she cries and leaves me. I go on alone till I rest. Irony, fate, or the God that loves cosmic jokes put the place where she would check her email in direct line of sight of where I would happen to rest for a brief moment. I saw her but she did not see me. For a moment I considered moving on but that moment was short for I felt the right thing to do, plus I missed her for I was a bit in love. I said sorry, she was glad to see me but showed me no love. Instead of walking with me she would walk 8 feet in front or behind me. I went to the hostel and they only had the one reserved bed for us. The people were mean to her but nice to me. We leave my hostel and look for a hostel for her. I wanted her to take my hostel and told her I could look for a hostel but she did not like that solution. As we looked for a hostel she walked 2 meters ahead and if I come close, she moved away and told me she no longer trusts me nor feels safe with me. She is following a point on the map that I made that showed the area the place was in but she thought the point was the exact location. I tell this to her but she does not understand nor listen for she is avoiding me and in a panic for we are at the spot and she does not see the hostel. I finally just stop in place and yell youre never going to find the place That is not where the hostel is, it is just a dot on a map. She stops and starts to cry. She says I tricked her and lied and fooled her and that hurts me for I haven been explaining and telling her the truth the whole time but she would not listen. I say I am sorry and will fix it at any cost. If she wants to see Rome I will pay for her hotel anywhere till her plane takes her home. If she wants to go home now I will buy the train ticket back to Berlin right now. I say I am sorry you no longer trust me but before you leave me I need to know you are safe and taken care of. She cries and says, I feel like a whore. This connects with me in the way we are no longer a team but now an aftermath. I cry too and wail, what happened to us?! I am a wreck sobbing, I loved you so much. I am a broken mess. She holds me, cleans me up. We recover and discover the only way to finish is the way

we started, together. I tell her that she is free to leave or be with me, but as long as you want me on your team, I will be your mate. We find the hostel instantly and get two beds for the rest of our time in Roma. The next day I try to go to contact improv dance alone. I leave her near the river and we agree to meet back at the hostel and we both have phones. The Italians are mean and rude in that when they do not understand what I am saying to them, they just want me to leave. I give them money and in Italian explain (I only understand part) that I may not enter and they give me my money back. I then try to use my phone to translate saying, Please I understand I am late but I cam 10,000 kilometers. They just try to make me leave and will not even read the translation so I try to say it in Italian out loud as they say they will call the police. A nice person comes out reads the translation and types back that contact improv no longer happens here and the current class is a tango class series and new students and drop-ins are not welcome. I apologize in Italian and leave. I wander not far and fate would have it that I bump into my travel mate. We decide to just stick together for every time we try to part, fate brings us together. We then visit global village in Roma. I walk in happy and dancing and in Italian a black man says, You speak English? He seemed angry and I realized I was the only white guy there. Jazz then stops in says she is Brazilian and that I am with her. They love her, show her around, at sunset we go, we eat at McDonalds often for it is the only place we find and eat pizza sold by weight. We cuddle and shower get back into love, just before the end. We end how we started in love. She is on the train looking through the window and I start performing my bahnholf clown bits. I start to cry but I keep performing. I mime out our entire adventure together. Meeting, being in love, hitch hiking, her leaving, our fights her helping me, I mime it all good and bad and when I finish the train starts to leave, she starts to cry, I flip my hat (not knowing it would be the last time I flip my 1st hat). The train stops shortly after it left, as if to say, you can come too. But even though emotions ran deep, my vivid memories reminded me that adventuring solo can be just as much fun as with someone. Even when it is with somebody as special as Jazz.

Zurch has one last laugh when the boarder check process has me lose my hats. Both the one from silly sallies and the black x-mas hat. In Milano I have a long layover. I was going to have a short one but I was so sick of Roma that I went to Milan early. As I was at a ticket machine a gypsy was being very helpful to me. I thought accepting this persons kindness would help the gypsy racism I was starting to develop from Paris experiences. Until I caught her picking my pocket. I literally caught her by the fingers and would not let go. I yelled, Thief, help in English, This woman is a thief. Another lady shoves me away from her and she says 7 in Italian and the other lady scolds me and makes me look like I am some evil man that was hurting this woman for no reason. I tell the authorities but they do not help even though the woman was well above 18! I spend the next 4 hours watching thieves. Never alone, always a non-worker lookout that steps in if there is trouble and acts like member of public to re-tell the story. They pick victims by language barrier. If I was not catching a flight to LA I would have followed one home. Justice rage. On the flight back to LA I meet an Iranian girl who was immigrating to the USA, San Diego. She enjoyed speaking English with me and I loved helping her. As soon as I got off at LAX, I meet a girl from Seattle. Her hotel by chance was the Wilshire Hotel blocks from my house so I helped her public transit to where she was going. We were the only whites on the train but all the blacks, Asians, and Mexicans were happy, friendly, social. I nearly cried I was so positively culture shocked. People had boom boxes that they held playing tunes, it was great. We drop my stuff off at my place but it is locked and nobody is home? We go to her hotel and fall asleep instantly. The next day I show her Venice Beach for she only had one day to see LA. There are 3 people doing Occupy Venice and I am so excited to see any Occupy anything I go and show my support but mean guy there asks if I am in line? I say, educate me what is in line? He says, with the movement, for this isnt a party. I feel insulted and bad vibes. Here I come to support Occupy LA and I get Mr. Attitude Elite. I start planning in my head to go to New York (this was before I knew about the Real Occupy downtown). I goodbye my new visitor and hello that who is busy. Rawsome is shut down so I sit at a bus stop heading to Villanova

and Anna Jackson picks me upo in her cat car (cosmic painted). I am glad to see her, she is happy to see me, we ride semi silently to the villa and I hug Meline and Grace and meet a new girl who takes me to a hipster show that I can not get into cuz I am not cool enough. I do learn Occupy is downtown and when I go home I climb the fire escape and get to the door but nobody home locked and no USA cell phone so I go to occupy and sleep there.