spirituality - lesson 19: how to read a personlike a book
it's funny, we see faces around us everyday, we deal with expressions and bodymovements more than we speak, and yet few of us could say that we have afinely tuned awareness of this non-verbal communication.
most of the time we listen to someone with the intent to reply or impress rather than to understand. our minds do not have the capacity to do both, therefore thebest thing to do is forget about concocting clever remarks and instead justlistening properly. you will learn much more this way, and retain that knowledgefor longer.there is also an unfortunate natural ability for the brain to override subtle signalsfor meanings thatsuit preconceived judgements. a desired outcome will mask a real indicator distorting the perceptionof someone we are trying to communicate with.
easily the least controversial of all the areas of nonverbal communication is facialexpression, as it is the most readily observed group of gestures. we focus our eyes on the face more often than on other bodyparts and the expressions we seethere have widely accepted meanings. the face provides us with the opportunityto identify individuals before words have been spoken and a canvas to expressdifferent emotions every second. when in conversation with someone we arecontinually decoding the messages that are being transmitted subconsciously tous.
there are five basic smiles
do smile’; the ‘nonsense smile’ usually occurs when somebodyis by himself and happy; the ‘broad smile’... smiles
should not always be
associated with happy moments, there is the ‘lip
in smile’ (where the lower lip is
drawn in between the teeth.) it implies that the person feels in some way
subordinate to the person she is meeting. and beware of the ‘oblong smile’! a
smile that we use when we have to be polite. we girls use it also when we get toomuch attention from a drunk... no smile at all - any poker player clearly
understands what you mean when you say that he has ‘a poker face’.