Masque

After the day I turned twenty years old, during the hour I was born, the gift came to me. Like the flick of a light switching on, the rush of outside voices started to cram full in my mind and tug at my heart with need. It wasnt totally foreign a concept to grasp. Its not as if they didnt warn me this would happen. Jennifer said that sometimes the depths of each gift skip a generation. You could luck out little sis, she had offered to me during the psychotic week before my birthday party. She spoke from experience. Her gift only came and went. The compulsion to follow through with it was choice rather than necessity. So maybe my turning wouldnt be so bad after all? Yeah right I thought to myself. Ian warned me I showed all the signs of being the strongest of my generation. I promptly told him to shove it. No way was I going down the way my dad had. Hed been the strongest of his generation and look where it got my family: fatherless and still grieving. All because of the stupid gift that was supposed to help us save lives. It was this gift that sent us running to a new town every couple of years. Sometimes we didnt last that long. After so many runs the signs were painfully clear to mea too grateful family, recognition for our service to the community, suspicious glances Soon as the looks began we packed up and shipped out to the next podunk town on the map. For now we had settled in Nowhere, Texas, a town that wasnt a town after being swallowed up by the cities creeping into its turf. First impressions of the place werent so hot. I thought we were trying for inconspicuous this time. After what happened in the last small town wed tried to help I thought my uncle would have sworn off them forever after. I still had nightmares about the outskirts of Hattiesburg Mississippi. Instead of falling through the cracks in the city here we were in yet another small town. Most of my Clan had been forced to forswear the merits of higher education, but we were the hardest workers youll ever meet. Wed work any job that tolerated us and we never lived beyond our means like the rest of this cursed country. So we saved up enough to pass down the next generation sometimes, even occasionally go the extra mile and spoil ourselves. Dad used to buy and fix up old houses, often in the same neighborhood. Each time he picked a new home to patch up he carted us with him, or sent us to stay with his little brothers brood. Within days he could turn a rundown shack into a mansion and sell it on the spot. But like most of my kind, he was too good at what he did. It brought the worst kind of attention in the end. Since then my own ambitions for higher learning had toned down a lot.

A year ago my aunt finally found a spot in Nowhere to start her dream, a tiny caf, more of a shack than a hot spot. Yet within weeks people flocked in by the dozen, sometimes just to catch a glimpse of the beautiful service. Another perk about being one of the Clan, we were naturally more attractive than the average Joe. Now dont get any visions of Twilight vamps in your head. In fact, go ahead and X-factor out your little theory of my being a vampire period. If you saw the real version of what people call vamps youd wish youd never thought about them, let alone want one for a boyfriend. Honestly, werent there enough of them running around in your TV? Arent you sick of them yet? I digress. The caf was nice, just off the main drag through town, across from the cemetery and a couple of gas stations, just down the way from the Dollar General and Sonic. We all worked it, me, my aunt and my cousins. None of us had the ambition to go to college. At least we were too afraid to dream of a bigger life than the one the Man upstairs handed us. I worked the longest shift. Ever since Dad died mom had been hard pressed to pay the bills. We were still living with my sister Jenn and her husband and toddling kiddoes. Talk about cramped up close and personal. Do not even get me started on what its like living with two screaming brats after working the twelve hour shift. I watched my aunt and older cousins hover around customers with a painted smile on their faces, that delirious joy using their gift gave them. We helped people with their problems. Sometimes it was a simple conversation over a poured cup of coffee, most of the time it was a pain in the arse from what I could tell. The day before I turned twenty I was living up the fact I didnt suffer from any psychiatrist syndrome or chronic smiling. I messed peoples orders up on purpose, spilled occasionally, laughed evilly while my cousins jumped at the chance to help clean up. Sometimes they make it so easy I grinned as I watched Amanda and Mike rush to help the kids at table four. How did the iced cream end up in their laps? Ill never tell Bethy! Aunt Tammy called out from behind the kitchen window, flaxen hair hidden in its net, emerald eyes narrowed in on me. I meekly skipped over to snatch the steaming orders shed just set out. Just before I could turn the other way she raised a wooden spoon and called again. Uh-oh I knew that tone. Twisting fast enough my pigtail blonde braids whipped round my shoulders I flashed a brilliant smile, Aunt Tammy? Whats up? Her mouth twitched with the slightest of grins. Bethy I know youre the reason weve had trouble today. Trouble? I feigned ignorance. Id plead the Fifth if I had to avoid the truth.

Leaning with her elbows over the counter she smirked. People said I reminded them of her. They were right, which sucks for me trying to get away with anything under her watch. Mhmm She drawled. Unless you expect me to believe those poor kids dropped their own ice cream? I shrugged, plates hot in my hands. I used just a bit of my gift to keep it from burning my skin. Not my fault they couldnt hold their cream. I offered sweetly and laughed on the inside. It was BS. I knew it and Aunt Tammy knew it. Her mouth trembled with the beginnings of a laugh. Tonights the night of the big party, eh? My humor sucked out of me like a vacuum. I turned to the table waiting for their order and glaring pointedly at me. Amanda suddenly appeared out of nowhere, eyes fierce, tone biting as she jerked the plates out of my hands, Sometime today Bethy! and sashayed away. I rolled my eyes and reluctantly listened to my aunt. I hated that nick name Why do people give people full names just to call them something else the rest of their lives? The big two-oh is the first day of the rest of your life Bethy. We pulled all the stops out for you. She winked, reminding me further of my exalted status among the Clan. Our bloodline was older, supposedly purer whatever that meant. Because Dad was our leader and had no son, people looked to me to lead. Me! Ha! I did good to pay my bills every month and have time for a social life. Yeah, I know I leaned the opposite edge of the counter while Tammy rushed to save her other dishes. Tammy loved the caf. She was a natural cook, part of her gift she claimed. I just wish you guys had done what I asked. Tammy gaped aghast. And not throw a party?! Honey it aint every day one of the Clan turns the big two-oh! Specially not one special as you are. I know its childish, but I couldnt help rolling my eyes. The short skirt uniform we were forced to wear was kiddy enough. Not everyone cares about me turning twenty. It was a lie of course. Everyone stopped by our place once a week the last three months to tell me how excited they were about my turning. Tammy laughed a witchy cackle and rounded on me with three new dishes. Yes, she was that fast. Still havent faced it have you? Well, let me tell you something sweet cakes. None of us were ready for the big two-oh, but it rolls in like a freight train and you better be ready or itll run you over flat! She cackled again. Huffing a sigh I turned to my neglected tables and silent rebellion. Amanda was there already, hands on her hips, snatching the orders away from my hands. I grinned. Here was one person who could care less if I turned the big-two-oh.

Maybe we should just save the decorations and throw Maija the masquerade! I laughed. Its not a friggin masquerade Amanda! Its in the diner! ~ Aunt Tammy wasnt kidding when she said theyd pulled out all the stops. Within a few hours after I got off, early for once, Tammys Caf was transformed into something ethereally dream like. Another perk to being us, we do everything really well. Ironically enough it was my cousin Mike who was the expert at throwing a party. He and his younger brother Chris had shown up a few years before to join our Clan. We often saw drifters like them come and go. His brother Chris had joined the Navy, using his cooking gifts to help others in his own way. Mike and Amanda fell in love and the rest as they say is history. Aside from knowing a lot more about interior design than any American male should, Mike could bus a table as quickly as Tammy could whip up a dish of gumbo. He and Amanda and my mom had done more than the usual two-oh requirement. For starters there were no electric lights. Scores of candelabrum and candlesticks were pulled out of Clan storage and penetrated the October chill in place of a heating unit or light bulb. It cast an eerie, ancient feel to the place, like winter nights at Grams house used to be. The old ways were part of our religion, if we had one. We all believe in God, but maybe not exactly the same way you would. Guess you could say our origin story was a bit personal once upon a time. And we hadnt obeyed His orders like we were supposed to. Helping others with our gifts was the way we tried to earn back favors from Him. Some of us didnt believe we had souls. I dont know just yet what I believe. Elders say you cant understand until the turning. The place smelled like roses and the thousands of other flowers my Uncle Bob had stocked the place full with. No one grew gardens like Bob anymore. There he was with his wife Judy and their children, all dressed in clothing a time apart, masques firmly in place with ribbons around their heads. Even with the masques I could recognize them, each and every one of them. Hard to miss the features of people you knew better than yourself. Aunt Tammy bustled around the kitchens in full regalia, her children serving the long tables set up around the walls of the diner. It made the place look much bigger. A dance floor had been brought in for the centerpiece. Candlelight made the black tile gleam like obsidian. Cousins and closer relatives danced at the center to the beat of drums and stringed instruments. It had a slightly primitive sound compared to the highbrow culture dancing to it. Even more ironic were the blue collar Americans dancing in clothes passed down the line, made to last by gifted hands, betraying the fact our Clan was very rich. Not everyone owns a dress with sapphires or diamonds sewn into it.

OMG! Bethy! Can you believe this place! Kaylie, a relative of mine connected two different ways in the family tree, raced up to me in her silver gown, heels clicking on the tile, features framed with her stylishly short bob. Rather than offset the fine clothes and jewels she was wearing it suited her. Then again, Kaylie always managed to make an outfit work for her. I couldnt help but grin and get excited with her bubbly aura around me. Her gift was making other people happy and yes it was a welcome addiction when things got too tough. Yeah its pretty amazing. I ducked my head in time to avoid a shower of glitter my cousins preferred to confetti and groaned. Kaylie laughed, obviously in on the ploy to stand on the X marking their spot. Her soon to be Alfred, another drifter from further south rushed up to me to toss a handful of the crap over my head while laughing. Gotcha! Alfred! What theHAPPY BIRTHDAY! Everyone cheered as bottles opened with a pop and sizzle. I know what youre thinking. I should feel loved, like the most spoiled precious pampered teen on the planet. But the fact of the matter was I felt trapped, wished I had had the guts to split like Ian did five years before. Fact was I was about to not be a teenager on the stroke of midnight and I was afraid of the thing that would make me their leader. My mothers arms wrapped around me from behind. I could tell because of the sudden surge of comfort that flowed from her fingertips onto my bare shoulders. Christy always knew how to make me feel better with a touch, it was her gift. The same voice that comforted us when Dad died, when we should have comforted her, whispered. Just breathe in and out. Drink some champagne. Thisll be over soon. I twisted my head, conscious of my softly curled and pinned up hair. Thanks mom. I said as I took the glass from her hands and lifted it to the crowd. Thanks you guys! Speech! Kaylies two younger brothers, Matt and Stevo shoved one another while shouting over the crowd. Everyone laughed at their antics, even though Alfred knocked their heads in together to shut them up. It wouldnt work. Those two were impossible to stop once they got started. But Uncle Larry stepped from behind the head table with a warm smile on his face and a raised glass. Everyone quieted instantly. I froze, my gold diamond studded dress feeling very tight and heavy suddenly. His eyes held mine and echoed every thought I was having. It should have been Dad up there right now giving this speech. Uncle Larry was going to give it his best.

You all know this lovely lady here has sacrificed more than most for the good of the Clan. A murmur rose from behind the masked faces. Im here to tell you she is more than what any of us could hope for to take the place of those we lost. Tonight, Bethany Miller, as you Turn, keep a sharp eye on Ilu who gave your Gifts. Use them to bind to serve to live to breathe. Never forget who you are, who you the rest of his words blurred with my tears with the sudden need to breathe. Normally only the sight of blood made me faint. But this was too much. I searched the faces of the crowd, for what I dont know, was grateful when Christy placed her hand on my shoulder to calm me once again. I breathed. And like the clap of thunder their cheers rose as one, almost unnatural, for a second betraying our true hidden natures before the roar ceased and the music began to play once again. I went through the motions, danced in the pit with my younger cousins, waltzed with the elders to tunes an age gone by. It was the same party in a sense that I had watched for the last nineteen years, the same party with a different theme, a slightly different color. Tonight it was hues of gold rather than emerald or red. I opened a score of presents while they danced, and for a moment could almost forget the intense pain I was about to go through once the clock hands came together. My sister and nieces showed up to help with the distraction. Eventually this served to give me a splitting headache rather than a distraction. So I rushed to the bathroom behind the swinging double doors, braced my hands on either side of the porcelain sink and hung my head. Music pounded behind me a dull thud. I lifted my head and stared at my reflection. My sea blue eyes stood boldly out framed with black eyeliner and mascara, painted golden shadow. The dress clung to my waist and chest a golden silken thing. It flowed down in satiny diamond studded ripples past my feet. It was Grams dress once. Right now I wished she were here. Gram always knew how to make sense of this. With her I didnt manage to feel like the only person in a room full of family and friends. Now I was alone. A chorus of piercing screams, the shattering of glass and symphony of pain assaulted my ears. I gasped, rushed back into the party and pushed my way past the circle of dresses and suits to the center. Uncle Larry laid prostrate, blood pooling from his head and the stone tied with cloth and words lying beside him. We know who you are?! What does that mean! Who did this?!! Tammy was frantic.

Bob rushed outside with the other men, calling threats into the night. I was frozen, pale white. I couldnt tear my eyes away from the deep red, almost black body fluids, the lifelessness in Uncle Larrys eyes. Hes got a pulse! Mike shouted. Go get Shima! Amanda called out. Several of the women lifted Uncle Larry between them with ease. We werent usually as strong as our men, but stronger than humans. I stared at the blood and pulled myself away while everyone else rushed to follow the crowd making way to their vehicles. They would take him to the big house, I supposed. Thats where we held most of our Clan meetings. We couldnt take Larry to the hospital. We werent human enough for that. Only the elders could help him now. I stood alone in a sea of candles, the metallic scent of blood beneath my nose. Numbly I went to each candle stick and blew the wicks free of their flames. Echoes of the past were written in every aspect of this night. I felt sick to my very core. The party was ruined, and I couldnt bear to wait around and see if Larry lived through this tonight or not. We know who you are We had faced this before. There was a present darkness out there, evil that preyed and stalked us in the night, followed us wherever we went. It poisoned the minds of those we tried to help. They went by many different names, but the outcome of their efforts was always the same. I took one last glance at the diner before hauling my gifts to the apartment atop the caf, took in Tammys realized dream and knew she wouldnt try her dream again for a long time. I stayed here in their apartment most nights now, in the guest room that was looking more and more like my room. Not that I didnt love my sister and her kids or my mother, but it was harder to relate to them. I didnt like the million questions they asked, the doubt in their eyes. I wasnt like anyone else I knew in the Clan. Only person who had understood left five years ago and never once came back. My hands had lifted the window and feet crawled over the seal before I knew it. I needed fresh air, to get rid of the scent of blood on my nose. The roof was my special place. Id carted different things up there over the last few months, candles and blankets and armchairs. I was surprised to find the candles already lit and watched the clouds swathing the stars with the beginnings of a lightning storm.

Wrapping my arms around my chest I tried to ward away the cold outside and creeping inside my heart. I stared up at the fading stars and jumped when a voice interrupted my thoughts. Some party, huh? His voice was deeper than it sounded last over the phone, the red ember of his cigarette burned in the night before a final stream of smoke left his lips. He sat on the edge of the roof, legs dangling precariously over the edge. His black leather jacket hid most of his broad frame, but it was undeniably Ian sitting on my roof. I squealed, Holy crap! Ian! I rushed him. He laughed, threw his long legs from the edge and picked me up off the rough asphalt and swung me around. Hey, Bethany! Look at this! You look a little too good in that dress kiddo. Might need to put on a trash bag and then come back and see me, just for your own safety. He wagged his eyebrows at me mischievously and I punched him hard in the shoulder. Ow! That hurt! You deserve it! You left me all alone with these freaks! He laughed again and hugged her another time, eyes warm and unreachable as ever. I couldnt miss your turning. How much longer we got left? Twenty minutes maybe. I groaned. Ian laughed. Told ya it hurts like hell, but gets better. We sat together at the edge of the roof, beneath the lightning storm around my candles. He kept his arm around my shoulders. Finally I found the courage to ask, Are you sticking around this time? After a long silence, he added, My last tours done. Army doesnt own me anymore. He peered down at her and cocked a brow with a turn of his lips. Think Id like to see how you adjust to leading the Clan. He laughed. Its not funny! But I laughed too. And the laughter helped. When midnight struck we faced each other, his hand held the back of my neck when the first spasms shook me. When I began to tremble he cradled me in his arms and I clutched tight to his shirt, to the leather of his jacket. I shuddered as lightning sparked and rain began to put out the candles and drizzle on Grams dress. I saw bursts of sharp color, shivered beneath the sudden prickle of a thousand knives on my skin. Everything turned inside out, each droplet looked like tiny shards of glass and sprouted endless streams of rainbow color. Ians stormy blue eyes turned brilliant as the emerald salty seas. Wind blew fresh and full against my face. And I heard the voice perfectly clear in my conscience, the other voices hovering just below.

And instead of hearing the voices of humans I was meant to help, I heard the fears of the Clan, voices I had heard all my life. The loudest and strongest was Ians needing me to survive the turn, needing something deep rootedand then I saw the blurring of new color before the lights went out and I lost all sense of time and place.