Red Wine Helps You

Sleep on Trains
and other essential advice to survive
backpacking Europe when
you’re just plain poor

Scott Dean

Edited by Krystin Dean

 This book is for Grandpa Schaub who took me
on boat trips as a child which sparked my desire
for travel and adventure, for my parents who
supported me in all my decisions and came to
visit me wherever I was in the world and my
wife who signed on as my life-long travel buddy.

Every effort has been made to ensure this book is up-to-date as

possible at the time of going to press. Some details, however, such
as prices, telephone numbers, web sites and travel information
are liable to change. The author cannot accept responsibility for
any consequences arising from the use of this book, nor for any
material on third-party web sites, and connot guarantee that any
web site in this book will be a suitable source of travel information.
We value the views and suggestions of our readers very highly.
Please contact redwinehelpsyousleepontrains@yahoo.com.
A GUIDE TO THE GUIDE: UNITS OF MEASUREMENT
I never listened in science class when it was time to
BOOK TIPS
talk about kilometers, grams and Celsius, but I’ll tell
Throughout the book you’ll find red and white wine
you a few shortcuts to come close.
glasses. The red glasses are for tips like:
Temperature
Red wine helps you sleep on trains
When converting Celsius to Fahrenheit, just double
as well as planes or buses or
the number and add 30. It’s not exact, but close
ferries...
enough to know if it’s hot enough for a t-shirt and
shorts. For example, if the newspaper says the high
And the white wine glasses are for quotes from
in Rome is 270 C, double 27 and add 30.
fellow backpackers who wanted to share some of
their thoughts like: 27x2 = 54 54+30=840 F
It works the other way when trying to tell someone
“I love how you meet what the weather is like where you’re
involuntary it is to add from. If the spring in your town is around 640 F,
an ‘o’ or ‘a’ to the end subtract 30 and cut it in half.
of an English word and
say it with the local 64-30 = 34 34/2 = 170 C
accent in hopes they’ll
understand what Weight
you’re saying - ‘Uno The European Union A kilogram is close to two pounds. When buying
ticketo por favor.’” (EU) Flag (Headquarters meat at the market, about 125 grams is equal to
Scott Dean are located in 1/4 pound, which is a healthy portion for a meal for
Louisville, KY Brussels, Belgium.) one.
Distance
One kilometer is equal to 0.6 of a mile, so five
INTERNATIONAL
kilometers is roughly three miles.
PHONE CALLS
The US and Canada’s
dialing code is Liquids
001 + area code
When ordering those massive liters of beer in
and number (ie.
Germany and Belgium, remember that it is just short
001+(502) 555-7649)
of three 12-ounce cans of beer.
 CONTENTS

“HOW MANY STAMPS WILL YOU HAVE ON

YOUR PASSPORT WHEN YOU DIE?”
An introduction by the author..........................1

“CAN I BORROW YOUR TOOTHBRUSH?”

How and what to pack..................................7

“WHAT COUNTRY ARE WE IN TODAY?”

How to get around across the pond..................37

“I GOT DIBS ON THE TOP BUNK!”

How to adjust to hostel life..........................67

“STEP AWAY FROM THE FAST FOOD JOINT.”

How to eat and drink (well) for cheap..............81

“DUDE, WHERE’S MY WALLET?”

How not to get your stuff stolen.............................99

“BUT THE GUIDEBOOK GAVE IT FIVE STARS!”

How to sightsee for free and and decide what’s
worth paying to see..................................113

“WHEN I WAS IN EUROPE...”

How the European backpacking experience will
change your life.......................................135

The Mediterranean coast

Manarola, Italy Riomagiori, Italy
 “HOW MANY STAMPS
WILL YOU HAVE ON
YOUR PASSPORT
WHEN YOU DIE?”
An introduction by the author

Hiking through the hillside

Galway, Ireland
 This is not a book to tell you where to stay or where
to eat. I will not give you guidance on admission
prices to every museum in Europe or a detailed list
of every historic site to see in Rome. I will not harp
on the importance of culture and art or wine tastings
in Tuscany. I won’t discuss the possibility of renting
a car and driving the autobahn to Oktoberfest. I’ll
try not to get sidetracked by too many anecdotes
of my experiences on the rails of Europe that I
have accumulated the way a painter accumulates
canvases.
I will, however, try my best to give advice on
blisters, pocketknives and internet cafés. I will
illuminate the upside of knowing how to find north
on a compass and tell you how not to get your stuff
stolen. I will tell you how and where to pay to poop
and show you how to cut stinky cheese and open a
bottle of wine with a Swiss Army knife. I will teach
you how to deal with hostel showers and kitchens
and the art of catching a midnight train.
This is how to survive backpacking Europe when
you’re just plain poor.
After growing up in a modest home on the back
roads of Louisville, Kentucky, I made the decision
to see the world when I entered college. While
studying abroad in England for a year, I took my first
backpacking trip through Europe with a friend. I had
just turned 21, and I remember feeling like I had
gained a huge sense of myself and a new perspective
on the world.
Two years later, I took a girl named Krystin on
yet another five-week backpacking journey. The
words “trip of a lifetime” really don’t begin to
cover our experience. We watched a sunset on the
Mediterranean while sharing a bottle of wine on
2 Red Wine Helps You Sleep On Trains
the coast of Italy. We climbed the Alps together in
Switzerland to glimpse a view of heaven and breathe
in the purest air in the world. We survived an airport
strike in Belgium and spent the night on a cold airline
conveyer belt only to spend the next night outside
yet another airport in Paris sleeping on cardboard
boxes.
During our trip, I realized we really could survive
anything together. And so, on the last day of our
journey, I asked her to embark on an even bigger
adventure with me by proposing to her on the Cliffs
of Moher in Ireland.
My point is that backpacking changes your life.
Traveling through countries where not everyone
speaks your language and hand gestures are your only
form of communication is a humbling experience.
You begin to rely not only on the assistance of kind
strangers, but also to rely on yourself to survive each
new and unique destination. Once you find your way
around, witnessing things like the beauty of Paris,
the history of Berlin and the freedom of Amsterdam
alters you as a person.
You start to realize that a missed train means a
new opportunity. You remember what it’s like to
slow down and actually take in your surroundings.
When you return stateside, you will not be the same
person you were before you left.
I started writing this book after purchasing numerous
ones in preparation for my first trip that simply
didn’t provide me with the information I needed -
advice about how and what to pack, what hostels
are actually like and how to get around.
Within the pages of this book, I have attempted
to create a practical and detailed guide to ensure
that you are prepared for the trip of a lifetime by
How Many Stamps Will You Have On Your Passport When You Die? 3
providing insight into the questions we don’t think
to ask before we leave but later wish we had.
My goal was to make a book for fellow young and
adventurous Americans who want to make the dream
of seeing the world a reality and have limited funds
to do so. I was traveling on a tight budget during
both of my excursions, which ended up adding to the
experience rather than deterring from it. It is my
hope that you will save some money by doing your
research of cities and sights online and then utilize
this book as a guide for the rest of the essential
information you need to survive backpacking
Europe.
Red Wine Helps You Sleep on Trains (and trust me,
after riding the rails long enough you will find that
it does) was also created to encourage you to take a
personal journey, whether it be on your own or with
a close friend.
The most meaningful advice I can give when you
are preparing for your excursion is to not make it
your mission to see as much as possible in order to
check famous landmarks like the Eiffel Tower and
Berlin Wall off a list, but instead to resolve to soak
up every single moment of the journey. For some,
this will be your first time completely cut off from
family and all that is familiar at home. I encourage
you to embrace this opportunity by relying on your
knowledge, your backpack, your travel buddy and,
most of all, yourself.

Happy trails,

Scott Dean
O’Donoghues Pub
Dublin, Ireland

4 Red Wine Helps You Sleep On Trains

 “CAN I BORROW
YOUR TOOTHBRUSH?”
How and what to pack
 After booking your flight, receiving your passport
and obtaining your rail pass, the first major hurdle
you must cross is deciding what to take with you for
an excursion that will last weeks or even months
through Europe with only a pack and the clothes on
your back.
The two most important items are your backpack
and your passport, because both are essential to
your survival. Your pack becomes a closet, a pillow,
a cabinet, a fridge, a burden and even a friend.
(This may sound silly now, but just wait until you
bond during your trip together. I guarantee you will
probably have even developed a nickname for your
trusty pack when all is said and done.)
Once you have the right backpack, the next part is
obviously deciding what goes inside it. This is often
the hardest part of the process, so I have laid out
some ground rules for you, keeping in mind that
every backpacker is different.
PASSPORT FIRST, PACK LATER
Almost as comforting as your backpack is your
passport. This tiny rectangular book acts as a key
to the world, allowing you to travel freely from
country to country and accumulating character with
each stamp it earns.
For US citizens, passports are easy to obtain but
are not cheap and take about six weeks to receive.
Start the process early by visiting the
US Department of State web site, www.
travel.state.gov, and following the links to
apply for a passport. You can also pick up
information and applications from the post office.
The most important part of the process is having
proof that you are a citizen, which in most cases
8 Red Wine Helps You Sleep On Trains
is a birth certificate. This document THE
cannot just be a photocopy - it must PASSPORT
be a certified birth certificate. If you EQUATION:
do not have a certified document, it
can be purchased from the National
Center for Health Statistics web site,
+
www.cdc.gov/nchs/w2w.htm.
Once you have this document,
complete the paperwork online or
print it out and fill it in by hand. Get
a couple passport photos - you can
get one made at most drugstores or
some large copy centers. Make sure
your facial features and ears are
unobstructed or the passport agency
could make you take another one. +
The passport costs around $100, so
once you have the money, the photos,
your birth certificate and the form,
head to your nearest application
+
location (there is a complete list
online, but most likely it will be your
local post office) and send it off.
Be sure to
Passports are read all the
valid for 10 years instructions on
so it doesn’t
hurt to get the
the web site
carefully and
=
process started as fill in everything
soon as possible. correctly to
ensure your
passport is not denied. If absolutely
necessary, you can apply for a rushed
passport which only takes about a
week but will cost around $60 extra.
Can I Borrow Your Toothbrush? 9
 Canadian residents can visit have differently shaped backs and fronts.
w w w. p a s s p o r t c a n a d a . g c . c a , Packs come in different volume sizes (room inside)
where pretty much the same and the middle-of-the-road size is about 3,800 cubic
application process applies inches, or 67 liters. Don’t get suckered into buying
- fill out documents, get a a huge bag so you can take more clothes, as it will
couple passport photos and only become a burden. The larger bags are meant
obtain a birth certificate. You must also Don’t wait! for those doing serious hiking and camping that need
submit one other document to prove Passports to travel with clothes, bed, tent, food and a stove
your identity which can range from a take up to on their backs.
driver’s license to a provincial health 6 weeks to arrive. With all the online purchasing going on, nothing
care card. beats good, old-fashioned in-store research. If you
The fee is just over $100 and takes about two to four purchase a pack that has never touched your back
weeks, depending on whether you apply by mail or in before the trip, you run the risk of buying one that is
person. There is also a speedy passport service available uncomfortable and doesn’t fit, which can ruin your
to those who apply at Passport Canada locations that can trip - or at least ruin the days that involve a huge
take as little as 24 hours but costs about an extra $70. deal of walking from train station to hostel.
Many outdoor stores will have weighted sandbags
PURCHASE THE PACK
for you to load in the pack to ensure a proper snug
Once you find the right pack, your excursion is
fit. If the store does not provide these for you, take
guaranteed to be much more enjoyable. Packs
a few phonebooks or some of your old textbooks that
aren’t cheap, and if you find an inexpensive one you
are gathering dust. After weighing down the pack,
should probably keep looking. You should be able to
take a walk around the store.
find a new pack in the price range of $75 to $300,
I also suggest you take the opportunity to sprint
depending on size, material, features and brand.
through some of the aisles. You are guaranteed to look
The best packs have adjustable shoulder straps,
ridiculous, but it will be worth it. Until you’ve dashed
heavy padding on the back, a sternum strap that
from bus to train through hoards of people without
locks across the front and a sturdy waist belt. The
knocking one of them onto a track can you completely
belt is essential, as it takes a bulk of the load off your
understand the necessity of a well-fitted backpack.
shoulders and displaces it onto your hips and legs.
Some packs offer interchangeable belts in small,
medium and large sizes to cater to each backpacker,
so take this into account when trying on your pack.
Companies make different packs for men and women,
and I don’t just mean differences in colors and
patterns. Gregory (www.gregorypacks.com) provides
straps and padding for each sex, since men and women
Underground Station
10 Red Wine Helps You Sleep On Trains London, England