The life of a teacher (the retirement)

Windfield a. Bacoy
Hello folks. For quite some time we are not able to reach you due to some financial setbacks or maybe
just the lack of time to prepare the mag for you. Im not so keen with its reason but whatever it is, the
important thing is we are back. Most importantly, I am back hehehe.
Well, I have lots of things to share with you about the intricacies of life, about problems usually met by
teachers in doing their duties which most of us can relate to. You see, I always dreamed of becoming a
priest so that I can give a good amount of sermon to people, but this celibacy thing is quite absurd to me
and I cant resist the urge of you know what I mean. I am a lover of beauty and my wife possessed such
beauty any man could see it would be willing to renounce his faith. So that was it, I became a teacher
sacrificing my innocence and so I write this because I happen to be a school paper adviser that writes.
But what is most fitting to tell than my own experiences? For those who knew me might muse on the
thought that a loner, silent person and somewhat perceived as serious and no sense of humor can write
eloquently with a touch of humor. Did I hear the name Pinocchio? My nose, no matter how I lied, never
grow a millimeter. I have funny side which I would like to showcase and thats the truth.
Let me first share with you a poem which I happen to stumble upon while discarding the newspaper
wrapping of the dried fish I bought during my college days. Now, you have a glimpse on how dried fish
contribute to my stock of knowledge and witticism. Dried fish provided little nutrition though, so I
simply forgot the writer of the column much more the name of the sender of this poem. Let me
continue, here it goes:
My nookie days are over,
My pilot light is out.
What used to be my sex appeal,
Is now my water spout.

It used to be embarrassing
The way it would behave;
For every single morning
It would stand and watch me shave.

As old days pass
Sure gave me the blues
To see it hang its withered head
And watch me tie my shoes.

The columnist wrote on political issues and readily thought that this poem was mainly about politics. My
column is somewhat satirical so I will readily say its about the life of teachers. I dont main to embarrass
the masculine world by destroying males macho image. The poem tells a comparison of youth and old
age, the functionality of phallus and its downfall, yes, but most of all, this poem tells about the life
cycle of a teacher.

My father, a teacher like me, passed away from DepEd this School Year. By that I dont mean he died,
thats not literal. He retired this year, that is. Many co-workers during the ceremony conducted to give
him tribute, talked about how he worked as a teacher. How he strived to make both ends meet for a
family with two sons in college and how he declined the permanent item offered to him once, because I
was in college. New teachers might be confused on this action, but the oldies, the ones with withered
head can relate to this.

Newly hired or teachers with new items usually had to wait for six months or so before they receive
their first salary and maybe more months before they receive their regular monthly salary. Probably the
government or maybe people running the department only thought that the teachers felt the ecstasy of
being employed that they forgot to eat for six months. That was how every teacher live in the saying
man cannot live by bread alone but by the number of loans he applied to all banks and loan
institutions possible. It became a habit and old habits are hard to break.

Well, now my father finally retired from the service, and like the last stanza of the poem, he must retire.
I dont mean this literally, for while he is a retiree, his manhood is still and will be functional as in the
second stanza. His new wife can vouch for that, I suppose.

Will he receive million? Nope. Existing loan was the culprit. Once, I peeped at the pay roll as the
detective part of me emerged and maliciously conducted my informal survey and found that!
Tantaranraaaaan! Most teachers did not have deduction under GSIS. Some who managed to do it only
allocate a meager amount. One teacher I knew very well got a thousand peso deduction instead of five
thousand which he must pay.

That bastard should know that it is his obligation to pay now or suffer the consequence later. I tried to
convince him but to no avail. He has other prioritized obligations. Sadly I looked to him straight in the
eye to check his sincerity. Well, he is and I dare not question him, especially because when I checked the
name in the payroll, that teacher happens to be me, bhuhuhu. How I looked that person in front of the
mirror. While others may look at him with disgust, I look up at him with respect and admiration.

But wait, allow me to go back to the comparative analysis we undertake on the poem at hand and try to
acquire its lesson. We teachers in our prime have the sex appeal we need in teaching our students or
pupils. Lets not waste it. Why shall we hang our withered head if we can still stand strong with vigor
and enthusiasm? If we can do our task with excellence why sit and let the students copy the books to
their notes? Why just sit and talk when we can be active in facilitating the learning. In the end you will
be remembered by your actions.

I heard one professional who recounted that when she met her former teacher, she blurted, Sir John
used to call us to pull his white hair and sometimes told us to cook something for their snacks. The
proud teacher replied, See what I did? You are now professional. Yes of course, the student finally
made it and remembered how a teacher who was supposed to help her succeed simply acted like a
withered head, tsk, tsk.

Lastly, before I run out of space, let us be law abiding citizens. A school official once said in her speech
that we should abide with what DepEd mandated us to do. She also said that attacking a DepEd
personnel is like attacking the department because DepEd is highly bureaucratic. It goes to show that we
are protected. The department is protecting us in our work. Just dont go against the rules or no one in
the department can protect you because no one is above the law. We may twist the interpretation of
the law, but law of karma guarantees its backfire.

If I remember it right, our SDS mentioned three steps of action against an offending personnel: first
offense is reprimand, second is suspension and third is removal from the service. Let us not over
generalize that statement, however; the gravity of the offense matters. You cannot be reprimanded if
you smash the head of your pupil or student, you are committing criminal and administrative offense.
Let us give dignity to our uniform.

Later in your funeral, even if you are with a bad record, people will always talk about how good you are
in their giving of eulogy. You will notice it is heavily edited that it requires more than just a copyreader
who correct misspelled words; but a writer to correct misdeeds. In the end, even the dead can no longer
recognize that it is about his own life.

Thinking that I sound priestly in my preceding paragraph, allow me to retire to my bed and enjoy the
beauty of my wife before I run out of time and this thing in me which is so proud, attentive and vigorous
would finally retire and forever be placid.#