Foul Mouth Newsletter Volume 4, Issue 19 Thursday, June 3rd, 2010 THIS WEEK'S WINNER OF 5 FREE SHIRTS IS...

Alex Bartels! Am I seriously the only one who thinks that it's weird that the people who are s upposedly closest to God are super-prone to the temptation of rubbing on little boys' naughty areas? I'm not? Then why the FUCK aren't we doing something about it? Even now that everything has been stirred back up again, and that Nazi of a Pope has made public overtones that the Roman Catholic Whorehouse should "do pen ance" for it's part in covering up child abuse in the church, the media only tou ches on the subject briefly and somewhat quietly. If the Vows of Celibacy are so fucking difficult to uphold, then why the shit do n't they let priests get married? At least get those horny old Jesus-Humpers a w hore once a year. Any man can go insane if they never get a chance to squeeze ou t some baby-batter ever now and then. Can you imagine having blue balls for thir ty straight years? Well, I bet some of you lonely fuckers can imagine that well enough, actually. What the fuck are we supposed to do about this? Just reading the Goddamn Wikiped ia entry on the subject of Priest Abuse is enough to make the blood boil, especi ally considering the lenient way in which many of those priests were reprimanded . Is it going to take a fucking lynch mob rioting outside the doors of the churc hes before old, dirty men quit touching our kids? Considering the "forgiving" na ture of the Catholic religion, these fuckers may not even have to worry about he ll! "Oh, you molested 200 young boys during your years as a priest whose job was to shepherd and guide these young souls? Not good. Wait...you said you're sorry ? My mistake! Welcome to Heaven, baby-fucker!" What a dirty, dirty fucking thing to do. Every time a Catholic Priest gets a wea k little girl-slap on the wrist for touching little boys, an angel gets raped by Hitler's ghost. That's completely true, by the way. I read it in the Bible righ t next to the part where some 600 year old drunk guy builds a boat to save the w orld from being wet. We're putting out a brand new shirt this week that's all about rubbing it into t hese Catholic fuckers' faces that they tell all of their terrible secrets to guy s who masturbate to the thought of tight, little-boy asses. I guess all of that absolved sin has to go somewhere, right? This shirt is almost scary. you can scr oll down this Newsletter and get a peek at it yourself. It depicts three predato ry, vulture-like priests looming over a very shocked and frightened Alter Boy. T he text beneath the shirt reads, "Let Us Prey." I can't think of a more apt acco unt to what these evil bastards do. Pick up this high-quality, 6.1oz cotton t-sh irt right now for only $9.99 and show these Catholic fuckers that we won't toler ate their bullshit for one more second. Much thanks to our long-time fan, Katphish, for the awesome t-shirt idea. Good w ork, you evil fuck. -Cannon@foulmouthshirts.com