Callaloo, vol. 23, No. 3, Summer, 2000.

A 1 2 3 PORTRAIT OF A LEGEND

by JosefinaBdez

Our deity Ciguapa arrived in New York too. The subway steps changed her nature. In the ups and down to and from the silver-grey fast worms, her feet became as everybody else's in the rush hour crowd. She did not notice the drastic change. This was the first sign of assimilation -a concept not to be understood but experienced. And Ciguapa cut her hair; maybe to be in vogue or just to simplify her rituals. Her lover was not a hunter as the legend goes. He was a medical doctor by profession turned taxi driver by necessity. He, the gypsy Caribbean, worked for an uptown car service: La Base Tuya. In this base, our deity was codified to a mere 10-13. It meant mistress or wife. We never knew and she never cared. Their love was filled with few words, passionate actions, fast merengues, tasty sancochos and predictable trips to la remesa El Sol Sale Para Todos. These trips energized by green dollars reforested the island. Ciguapa works in a factory making pinkish dolls. Dolls that she never had. Dolls dulled by the unique smell of new. Earning less than the minimum, she managed to pay an immigration lawyer that she never met. She got her green card. It was not green.
This poem also appeared in Tertuliando/Hanging Out (1997), an anthology published by the CUNY Dominican Studies Institute. Reprinted by permission of the author.

Callaloo 23.2 (2000) 1038-1040

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Now she prepared herself to visit the Dominican Republic. What a triumph!! She made it. She made it! She made it? Huge suitcases, bought at 14th Street were filled with unthinkable, unnecessary items. Items to be sold at laughable prices. Prices calculated in dollars, paid in pesos. Laughable reality. She whose laugh is based on a constant and bitter cry. Constant nostalgia. Bitter reality. Unheard cry. Here is no man's land. Here is no woman's stand. You can become what you are not by circumstances, opportunity, luck, unluck, karma. You can become a saint or forget your divinity. My telephone is being checked for trouble the ATM machine coldly informs me in Spanish informed me there is not enough funds no it did not clear out yet and out-of-state check 4 working days dispossess dispossess premises must be vacant if money is not received before 5:00 pm Susan B. Anthony and Kennedy coins were traded by their face value 1971 1973 1980 issued by law treasured spent by dawn 2 dollar bills were the personified luck 2 dollar bills were the great surprise the educational loan people/voice activated machine got my address no tokens no tokens MTA does not accept pennies mine from this pockets shaven not from heaven there's no black box to swallow my Dominican quarter every letter is a bill threatening me to mess the credit that I don't have. My face and my hands told the ATM line that I did not have money hope is never transformed in dollars he dissed me he left too as the days with extra money for pints of ice cream he dissed me as the nights with $12 for 2 foreign films from the video-rental 1039

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I told you so I told you so filled the wire I told you so I told you so screams my mind tired please deposit 5 cents or your call will be terminated. This is a recording. Thank you.

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