Daughter Detox: Recovering from An Unloving Mother and Reclaiming Your Life
Written by Peg Streep
Narrated by Callie Beaulieu
4.5/5
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About this audiobook
The message of the book is direct: What you experienced in childhood need not continue to hold you back in life. What was learned can be unlearned with effort.
The book begins with DISCOVERY, opening up the reader's understanding of how she has been wounded and influenced by her mother's treatment. Recognizing the eight toxic maternal behaviors-dismissive, controlling, emotionally unavailable, unreliable, self-involved or narcissistic, combative, enmeshed, or role-reversed-lays the foundation for the daughter's awareness of how her way of looking at the world, connecting to others, and ability to manage stress were affected. DISCERNMENT delves into the patterns of relationship in her family of origin and how they played a part in her development, and then shifts to looking closely at how the daughter adapted to her treatment, either silencing or losing her true self in the process. Next up is DISTINGUISH, seeing how the behavioral patterns we learned in childhood animate all of our relationships in the present with lovers and spouses, relatives, friends, neighbors, and colleagues. The act of distinguishing allows us to see why so many of us end up in unsatisfying relationships, chose the wrong partners, or are unable to develop close friendships.
Active recovery begins with DISARM as the daughter learns how to disconnect unconscious patterns of reaction and behavior and substitute actions that will foster the growth of self-esteem. Understanding the triggers that set us off, the cues that put us on the defensive, and the default positions of blaming ourselves and making excuses for other people's toxic behavior are addressed, as are unhealthy behaviors such as rumination, rejection sensitivity, and more. RECLAIM is the stage at which the reader begins to actively make new choices, preparing herself so that she can live the life she desires by seeing herself as having agency and being empowered. Making new choices and figuring out how to manage her relationship to her unloving or toxic mother is the focus of REDIRECT. There are stories to inspire and challenge your thinking, exercises that show you how to swap out self-criticism for self-compassion, guidance on how to use journaling as a tool of self-discovery and growth, and advice on goal setting.
Finally, RECOVER challenges the listener to come up with a new definition of what it means to heal, suggests tools to overcome the obstacles she places in her own way, and strategies to become the best, most authentic version of herself.
Peg Streep
Peg Streep is both the daughter of a mean mother and the devoted mother of an adult daughter. She is the author or coauthor of nine books, including Girl in the Mirror: Mothers and Daughters in the Years of Adolescence and the bestselling Necessary Journeys: Letting Ourselves Learn from Life, both with Dr. Nancy L. Snyderman. Streep holds degrees in English from the University of Pennsylvania and Columbia University. A native New Yorker, she is married and lives in Burlington, Vermont.
More audiobooks from Peg Streep
Mastering the Art of Quitting: Why It Matters in Life, Love, and Work Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Daughter Detox Question & Answer Book: A GPS for Navigating Your Way Out of a Toxic Childhood Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
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Reviews for Daughter Detox
37 ratings2 reviews
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Daughter Detox is very helpful for anyone interested in family dynamics, especially regarding dealing with narcissistic or simply overpowering and interfering mothers.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This book was so helpful as a pairing with therapy and counseling. I highly recommend it.