A Patchwork of Stories
By Kaye George
()
About this ebook
Nine previously published tales from sunny side up to over hard. Includes Agatha nominated short story of 2010.This collection includes the story nominated for an Agatha in 2010, a diet spoof, a Walmart people short short, and much more. These stories originally appeared in Hard Luck Stories, Mouth Full of Bullets, Mysterical-E and others.
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A Patchwork of Stories - Kaye George
A PATCHWORK OF STORIES: 8 Tales from Sunny Side Up to Over Hard
by
Kaye George
SMASHWORDS EDITION
Copyright © 2010 by Kaye George
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
Smashwords Edition License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the author's work.
* * * * *
These stories appeared in the magazines listed below. I'm indebted to the editors for chosing my work and believing in me. I also have to thank my critique partners, many and varied, but mostly members of the Guppies.
Flash Mob
was first printed in Futures Mystery Anthology Magazine as Flash
in the July-August 2005 edition. It had placed second in the Fire to Fly short story contest in February. It was published in April, 2005, in Web Mystery Magazine as Flash Mob
.
The Fall
was published in The Writers' Post Journal in September, 2005, where it won first place in that month's flash fiction contest.
Fat Guru
appeared in the same publication in July, 2005, and was later chosen as one of the top twenty stories of 2005 for that magazine. As such, it was reprinted in February, 2006.
West Texas Waitin
(yes, I left the apostrophe off on purpose) appeared in Hard Luck Stories Fall 2006 in an issue themed psycho noir.
Several of the above were reprinted in Mouth Full of Bullets. Devil's Night
debuted there December 2007.
Retransformation
won first place in the Muse contest for Mysterical-E themed Murder and Mayhem at a Writers' Conference and was published Summer 2008. Levittown Louie
was published there Spring 2007.
New TV
was part of a tongue-in-cheek WalMart people project and was put up at Powder Burn Flash January 2010.
Last, but by no means least, Handbaskets, Drawers, and a Killer Cold
, which was nominated for an Agatha award for best short story of 2009, was published January 2009 in Crooked.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
FLASH MOB
THE FALL
WEST TEXAS WAITIN
DEVIL'S NIGHT
RETRANSFORMATION
LEVITTOWN LOUIE
NEW TV
HANDBASKETS, DRAWERS, AND A KILLER COLD
FLASH MOB
by Kaye George
Future's Mystery Anthology Magazine, February 2005
second place in Fire to Fly short story contest
Two hundred beepers woke up and chirped their signals to their keepers. The ones being paged read the scrolling messages, smiled, stuck the devices in their pockets and purses, and headed out.
*****
Melissa breathed a barely perceptible sigh of relief. Can’t relax too much yet. In two hours it will all be over.
*****
Last week he called her at work.
We should go out to dinner tonight. I made a big sale. Got the check in my hand.
That’s great, Matt! What time?
Sure you’re up to it, Mel?
Not that again! Yes, she had cancer. Yes, she was weak from her treatment day before yesterday. But please, Matt, don’t treat me like one of your porcelain dolls. She ignored his question and asked her own.
What did you sell?
That Currier and Ives print – the one you always hated.
Ah yes. The one that has brown all around the edges and people that look out of proportion. How much?
Hang on to your wig.
She gritted her teeth. How many times had she told him not to joke about her wig?
I got three hundred. And it’s been a very good week.
Her jaw relaxed and she pictured his proud, shining eyes, the color of melting dark chocolate. That’s great, hon. Let’s go to the new place in Dover. Lisa said the food was good, atmosphere great, and the prices not too awful.
I’ll be home around six. Leave around seven?
She remembered that as their last good night.
*****
Two hundred email flags popped up with their various dings, chimes and whirrs. Two hundred users clicked on the latest notice, grinned, and got up. Time to go!
*****
The restaurant was even better than Lisa had led Melissa to believe. The food was excellent. And the ambiance was positively romantic.
Matt’s eyes were dark pools in the dancing candlelight. And Melissa knew she looked better here than in a brightly lit place. Her pale skin had grown papery thin and even sagged a bit at the jaw line. Cancer treatment was not for the faint hearted.
The salads had just been cleared and the table crumbed when Mel caught a whiff of strong perfume. She felt almost dizzy from the nausea that rose in her throat. Intolerance to strong odors was another not-fun side effect.
The wearer of the offensive stench paused at their table.
Matt, darling!
she effused and leaned over to smooch him on the cheek, her mink dripping onto the tablecloth. The woman, forty-ish, slim, and overly jeweled, looked at Melissa.
Is this the little woman?
Her smile, stiff with what was probably Botox, was aimed at Matt. Good thing. She missed the daggers coming from Mel.
*****
One hundred cell phones rang, cawed, tweedled, and sang. One hundred people pressed buttons and watched messages go by. All right! Fun time.
*****
Who was that?
spat Mel after the clanking, furred socialite drifted off to her table in the rear of the restaurant.
Shh! Not so loud,
whispered Matt. She’s the rich bitch who bought the Currier and Ives.
Oh, so she’s stupid, too.
Matt frowned as the waitress slid their entrees onto the creamy white of the linen tablecloth and asked if they would like their drinks freshened.
What do you mean ‘too’
? Matt asked when they were alone again.
Huh?
You said she’s stupid, too.
Oh, I meant besides being generally annoying. I mean – kissing my husband in front of me. How gauche!
Matt bent his head to his food and his nostrils flared in that way that said he was pissed.
What?
she demanded. "Why are you upset with me? Because I don’t personally like one of your