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    The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires
    The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires
    The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires
    Ebook150 pages2 hours

    The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires

    By Tracey P. Milne AAHP

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    About this ebook

    Do you live with, work with or love a toxic person? Are you tired of always feeling down about yourself & your choices? Then this is the book for you. Unlock secrets to being happy even when you're dealing with unpleasant people. Discover new ideas and techniques that can help you break free from draining behaviour & away from those people who like to suck the fun out of life. If you consider yourself A Nice Guy or Gal, This book is for you.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBookBaby
    Release dateDec 19, 2014
    ISBN9781483547374
    The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires

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      Book preview

      The Nice Guy's Field Guide To Energy Vampires - Tracey P. Milne AAHP

      powerless.(3)

      Introducing The Energy Vampire

      (Energious, Vampiricous, Suckicus)

       THE ENERGY VAMPIRE IS AN ELUSIVE CREATURE, FOUND LURKING IN HOMES, BUSINESSES , SCHOOL YARDS, SHOPPING MALLS,PLAYGROUNDS, SOCIAL GATHERINGS AND THE WORLD WIDE WEB. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE & FOUND ON EVERY CONTINENT OF OUR PLANET.

      IF YOU ARE OVER THE AGE OF TWO, YOU HAVE MORE THAN LIKELY ALREADY BEEN STRUCK BY ONE OF THESE DECEPTIVELY DRAINING PEOPLE. THEY CAMOUFLAGE WELL FROM AFAR AND THOUGH NOT ALL VAMPS ARE EXACTLY ALIKE, THEY SHARE SIMILAR, IF VARYING DEGREES OF HUNTING TECHNIQUES & PROWESS. ENERGY VAMPIRES ARE SOCIAL CREATURES. THEY LOVE TO BE WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE . THEIR FAVOURITE ENERGY DONORS ARE US, THE NICE GUYS OF PLANET EARTH. WE'RE DELICIOUS!

       SO, WHAT ENERGY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT, AND WHY ARE THEY AFTER IT? IT'S THE ENERGY CREATED BY OUR THOUGHTS & EMOTIONS. THAT IS WHAT THEY TREASURE MOST. FOR THESE ZONES REPRESENT A DOORWAY TO AN ENDLESS PLAYGROUND OF POTENTIAL SABOTAGE AWAITING THEIR ENTITLED BEINGS. SADLY,THAT IS HOW THEY SEE US, THE AVERAGE DONOR, ENDLESS FODDER FOR THEIR DRAMATIC NEEDS.

      FOR EASY IDENTIFICATION AND TO MAKE IT MORE FUN FOR US, THIS BOOK HAS BEEN APPROACHED MUCH THE SAME WAY AS A FIELD GUIDE FOR BIRD WATCHER'S, ONLY WE'RE VAMP WATCHING INSTEAD. AS NICE GUYS , WE HAVE ENCOURAGED OURSELVES TO ALWAYS THINK KIND, POSITIVE THOUGHTS AND DO OUR BEST, TO LOOK FOR THE BEST IN OTHERS.

      THOUGH AN ADMIRABLE AND ENCOURAGED APPROACH, WHAT'S IMPORTANT TO REMEMBER WHEN DEALING WITH AN ENERGY VAMPIRE IS THAT, AN EQUAL OPPORTUNITY ENERGY EXCHANGE IS NOT WHAT THEY ARE LOOKING FOR. THIS GUIDE CAN HELP YOU SEE THEIR PATTERNS AND BREAK FREE FROM THE PEOPLE WHO LIKE TO KEEP YOU UNHAPPY ON PURPOSE. TAKING THESE PEOPLE TOO SERIOUSLY CAN BE DETRIMENTAL TO OUR MENTAL & EMOTIONAL HEALTH. I HAVE FOUND THAT HUMOUR IS ONE OF THE MOST EFFECTIVE VAMP REPELLENTS OUT THERE. SHOULD YOU DISCOVER YOU'RE CURRENTLY ON VAMP DONOR STATUS, I HOPE THIS BOOK HELPS YOU FIND ANOTHER WAY TO APPROACH RESOLUTION AND THAT ONCE AWARE, YOU'RE BETTER ABLE TO RESIST FALLING FOR THE MIND GAMES SOME PEOPLE LIKE TO PLAY AT YOUR EXPENSE. (4)

      General Attributes of An Underminer Vampire

      Calls ; your not gonna —? are you? Loud voice, overly critical, some have a vengeful hiss to their words. Scent ; differs from each vamp, but always a splash of superiority.

      Display: Disapproval through Tone of Voice, The Silent Glare, Eye rolling ,Tisk-Tisking , Sucking air through teeth, Heavy Sighing, Forehead Slap, Eyebrow raise, Pointing Finger, Turns red when angry, excessive hand waving, invasion of personal space, often spits when speaking.

      Hunting Style ; The Ego Trap & The Psychic Burr, Innuendo, False Entitlement. Energy Vampires generally like to set Ego Traps through a subtle statement or judgement. They're the people who like to pretend that they know something you don't know, and they are very good at it. They get into our head space through their clever use of words and innuendo.

      It can be so easy for a Nice Guy to fall for their Traps, by either becoming overly defensive or overly critical of ourselves instead of noticing the unusualness of the situation. When dealing with behaviour that feels off, ask yourself, "Is this normal? Is this what I usually experience when interacting with others? What's really going on here? These three questions could save a lot of heartache. I've also noticed they seem to prey upon a certain type of person. Nice Guys. Why? Because Nice Guys are often Peace Keepers, and sometimes the urge to Harmonize can be turned against oneself under the toxic emotional conditions & discouragement most Energy Vampires operate in.

      What follows are some tips to help you survive for when you simply can't walk away. Let's take a look at some common Vampire ploys. Hopefully, you'll never look at yourself or the people who like to suck the fun out of life the same way ever again. I have also included a summation of my alternative exercises in chapter 16 for your personal ease. Lets get started with a few examples of Energy Vampires that you can really sink your teeth into (pun intended). To get a better idea of just how subtle their warfare can be, and how to turn things around once you've fallen into Donor Status. Enjoy! (5)

      Chapter 1: When Vamp’s Have A Say.

      The Emotional Warfare of The Underminer Majors

      Meeting the family of an adult acquaintance or co-worker is always an eye opening experience . In the time it takes to have brunch, a lot can be revealed about someone you may have only known in a professional environment . In many societies, we are taught to be polite & respectful to our elders before we start kindergarden. So it is always a multi layered experience each time one gets invited to meet the parents of a co-worker or adult friend for the first time. Encounters with other people's loved ones, can give us deeper insight into where this person has come from, and how it might contribute to who they are now, or we are left more mystified than ever, as if they were hatched from an egg. Often the shared experience of surviving family together can lead to a friendship that grows beyond just work buddies, or they ensure that you never want to hang out on a personal level, ever again.

      Kate was one of those girls who looked like a real life version of Tinker Bell. Curvy and petite, with a shot of pixie like charm to go with her shot of short blond hair. Kate had a reputation for being the most kind hearted, hard working, approachable, competent and beloved manager at the company she worked for, and one of the best friends a girl could ask for. She had a way of helping people to stay upbeat, so they could stay productive. She had a sweetness about her that never felt put on, or for show.

      Kate was a genuine Nice Guy, and people responded to it. So I was honoured when she asked me to be in her wedding party.I happily accepted and circled the next Saturday on my calendar for our first official Wedding Get Together , A Bride's Maid Brunch , while the boys arranged for a round of Groomsmen's Golf. What would follow was to open my eyes to a whole new world of sucky behaviour, and I was reminded through this experience, that it is always our responsibility to stay vigilant in what we will and will not believe about ourselves.

      For there are those in this world who delight in tearing people down & highlighting the perceived flaws of others. As you will see in the following story, there are all kinds of ways to undermine someone, and often it is the relationship to the Energy Vamp that determines how long we keep them in our lives and draining us on a regular basis. It can be challenging for Nice Guys to draw healthy boundaries, especially when the Vamp is Kin. (6)

      The Underminer Major Vamp

      Call: Do as I say & You're not going to ______ are you?"

      Scent: Disapproval, Disappointment & Vinegar

      Habitat: Homes, often impossible to please parents.

      Hunting Techniques ; The Psychic Burr ( a casual but cruel

      verbal barb that causes chronic thoughts designed to undermine

      our ability to believe in ourselves.

      An Impossible list of standards for their approval.

      Guilt trips are a favoured technique by many, as well as interruption,

      domination & corporal punishment as a consequence when the child is young.

      Exasperation & Disappointment when child reaches adulthood.

      Strict to the nth degree. Hard to be a nice guy child to a set of parents like this. (7)

      Follow That Cat

      It was a beautiful, bright sunny day when all the girls gathered in the kitchen of Kate & Mike's new home. There would be three bride's maids including myself, one maid of honour,two flower girls and one ring barer (and a partridge in a pear tree). Silver and Gold would be our bridesmaid colours. Kate beamed as she took us on a grand tour of the place, telling us about all of the purchases she and Mike had made together so far. It's been amazing Kate said finishing off our tour by bouncing back into the kitchen, like one great big treasure hunt that we're in on together. She was so happy, and Mike was such a great guy that the rest of us were all grinning like fools too, as we toasted The Bride to be.

      Then Kate's smile faded as she said quietly, I hope my folks like the house. They haven't seen it yet. Did I mention? They'll be dropping by soon to meet all of you. Then, drinking her entire glass of wine in one fell swoop, Kate let out a half hearted laugh and said I might as well warn you guys, sometimes they can be kind of critical. Then she smiled the saddest smile I have ever seen and said I know they mean well & they love me, so do me a favour you guys and just bare with them, ok? Just as she finished her sentence there came a pounding knock from the front door. I felt the hair on the back of my neck begin to stand on end as I watched her cat awaken from a dead sleep to scurry off out the back door as fast as it's feet could travel. Oh, how I wish I had followed that cat.

      I watched as Kate's usually bouncy step became slow and measured as she approached her own front door. Her shoulders began to creep up, seeking refuge behind her ears,at the same time her back stiffened into ramrod straightness. The pounding grew louder some how, and only stopped when the door had been opened.

      There standing in the door way were two people wearing identical grimaces of disapproval. Kate's Mother, who refused to move beyond the threshold, looked like she smelled skunk, as Kate's Father pushed past her and began a running commentary that would leave the rest of us breathless and without an appetite.

      What's wrong with the door bell girl? Her father chimed removing his coat and tossing it at Kate, doesn't that man of yours care enough to see that you've got a proper door bell? Must I do everything myself? He asked rolling up his sleeves , preparing to fix her doorbell right then and there.

      Please don't worry about it Daddy Kate said as she moved him & her mother out of the door way and into the foyer. Mike and I decided we don't want a doorbell,but thank you Daddy. But he was too busy talking over her to hear what

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