Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)
    The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)
    The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)
    Ebook122 pages1 hour

    The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)

    By John B. Costello, MD

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    This book will help you decide whether to stay married or divorce.
    There are four stages to the vocation called marriage. Getting married; accumulating unhappiness or happiness in the state of marriage; deciding whether to stay married or divorce and fourth, either working at the marriage or battling thru the divorce.
    Every married spouse goes thru these steps. For the spouses that never had to think of divorce, steps two and three were short and happy efforts, concluding with years of a happy marriage.
    For the rest of us this book is meant to clarify step three. It is a tutorial on why and how to stay married or why to divorce. There are other books on how to divorce.
    The book was written from my experience and with the advice of my patients many divorce experiences.
    You will be blessed if you understand the advice presented in this book.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherJohn B. Costello, MD
    Release dateNov 11, 2015
    ISBN9781310653902
    The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)

    Related to The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)

    Related ebooks

    Relationships For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      Two Things That Will Strengthen Your Relationship

      Nov 20, 2020

      Kobus van der Merwe, a relationship therapist from Imago Relationships in Pretoria, says only about 10% of couples put in the work it takes to feel truly joyful together. He says the reason many marriages end is linked to the reasons we fell in love

      1 min read

    • Article

      Family: A Mindful Approach To Divorce

      May 15, 2019

      Divorce doesn’t have to be a war. In fact, a mindful and healthy divorce is possible. Parents who practice mindfulness during their divorce experience less fighting, lower stress, and more beneficial divorce agreements. Most importantly, a mindful ap

      2 min read

    • Article

      How To Cope With An Affair

      Jul 2, 2020

      When an affair’s revealed, it can seem like the end of the world, says Sue Quilliam, but here’s advice to help you get through it: ✣ Acknowledge the shock. Don’t underestimate the impact of infidelity. You will be angry, sad, fearful. Be kind to you

      1 min read

    • Article

      Solve It In 7

      Jun 25, 2020

      Solve It In 7
      1 min read

    • Article

      Learning To Forgive

      Jul 11, 2019

      Learning To Forgive
      1 min read

    • Article

      The Myths

      Dec 16, 2020

      There are also a number of myths regarding stereotypical candidates for infidelity, or why people engage in an affair in the first place. Dr Shirley Glass and the Relationship Institute Australasia debunk some of these myths here... Attraction to so

      1 min read

    • Article

      LISTEN To Love

      Sep 11, 2019

      LISTEN To Love
      2 min read

    • Article

      6 Ways To Tackle The ‘Don’t Fancy Him’ Trap

      Mar 5, 2020

      1 If you have ‘off’ days where you don’t find your partner attractive, don’t panic! But if you have ‘off months’ or ‘off years’, take that seriously. 2 However unsexual you might be feeling, try to keep the physical affection. Hold hands, cuddle or

      1 min read

    • Article

      The Good Partner TRUST TESTS

      Jun 9, 2022

      The Good Partner TRUST TESTS
      9 min read

    • Article

      I Charge For Cuddles

      Jun 13, 2019

      I Charge For Cuddles
      3 min read

    • Article

      How To Navigate Your Breakup

      May 11, 2021

      ‘MY ADVICE IS ALWAYS to work on the relationship if you can,’ says Sara Davison, ‘but there are times when you must face the fact that a marriage isn’t working. If you are with a partner who doesn’t love you, it will damage your self-esteem.’ This is

      1 min read

    • Article

      How To Cope With BETRAYAL

      Jul 2, 2020

      How To Cope With BETRAYAL
      6 min read

    • Article

      Awareness of Endings

      Oct 22, 2019

      Awareness of Endings
      1 min read

    • Article

      Lost that LOVING FEELING?

      Aug 31, 2021

      Lost that LOVING FEELING?
      4 min read

    • Article

      Love Language

      Jan 1, 2018

      Start by reading by-the-book vows from your own religion if you practice a certain faith, and others as well, to see what strikes a chord with you. Incorporate these samples into the original words you write, or simply use them as a jumping-off point

      1 min read

    • Article

      Let’s Connect

      Oct 6, 2020

      The last few months have tested the strength of our relationships and shown why connection is the glue that holds our lives together. In our Dossier on page 42, we explore how to tell the truth, communicate openly and create rewarding and real relati

      1 min read

    • Article

      Turn-on Territory

      Jan 21, 2020

      These easy intimacy tips can lead to a sexy boost in the bedroom: Make time for it! Sex isn’t always spontaneous. Just like how you would plan a date night that works for both of your schedules, you can also make time for intimacy. More than interc

      1 min read

    • Article

      Forgive And regret?

      Jul 9, 2020

      Forgive And regret?
      3 min read

    • Article

      The First-time Guide

      Sep 9, 2018

      The First-time Guide
      3 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry)

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      The Wikipedia-ed Divorce (An Honest and Concise Totorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (whom to marry) - John B. Costello, MD

      The Wikipedia-ed Divorce

      Subtitle (An Honest and Concise Tutorial on how to decide whether to divorce or stay married (or whom to marry)

      By

      John B. Costello, M.D.

      Copyright © 2015 by John B. Costello, M.D.

      Smashword Edition

      Smashwords Edition License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your enjoyment only, then please return to Smashwords.com or your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      Table of Contents

      Dedication

      Introduction

      Why write this book?

      A Heartfelt Hug

      Why use this title?

      Who am I?

      Chapter 1 What is a reasonable definition of Love?

      Marriage

      Divorce

      Chapter 2 Why did this divorce event start?

      Defective Spouses

      About Sin

      Can you or your spouse stop sinning?

      Chapter 3 Who do I look to for advice?

      Family and Friends

      Religious Personnel

      Psychiatrists, Psychologists or Group Therapy

      Who to get the best advice from

      Lawyers

      Chapter 4 Can a person change?

      Chapter 5 Who am I?

      Who do I want to be?

      How do I change my Behavior?

      Chapter 6 Variable financial issues in deciding to stay married or to get divorced

      Chapter 7 Variable health issues in deciding to stay married or to divorce

      Chapter 8 Social Issues in deciding to keep or let go your spouse

      Family History

      Social Issues

      Chapter 9 Should I keep this spouse?

      The Character Grid

      Chapter 10 The variable of children in deciding to keep or discard your spouse

      Chapter 11 How do I keep my spouse?

      Chapter 12 How does what we just talked about change whom I want to marry?

      Epilogue About Happiness

      Dedication

      There is shame and there is guilt. When told by your spouse that the marriage is over, both hit you like a ton of bricks. Whether true or not, when your spouse tells you the problem is You, you are in the same place as Donkey, aptly described in the first Shrek movie (Shrek, DreamWorks Pictures, 2001); I’m a donkey on the edge.

      Right from the start of the event called divorce, both sides of the relationship — the spouses, their families, their friends and coworkers — go insane before, during and for about one year after the paperwork is signed.

      In November of 2008 my wife said she was fed up with everything and had found a ‘friend’ on the Internet. She wanted to leave the marriage. She filed for divorce February 9, 2009 and left town May 1. By November she wanted to come home. Because of job commitments in the other city, she returned May 2010. After five years, she and I stayed together.

      I began writing this book in March 2010 and completed it Easter week 2015, which means the insights in the book were recorded in real-time and many of the examples in the following chapters were lived by me or my family and are true events.

      I wrote this book to remember and honor my patients that shared their experiences of divorce and marriage. They kept me from going over the edge. Their hugs, handshakes and prayers saved my soul and our family. Their wisdom allowed me to understand my spouse, my children and myself. They helped me understand her parents, sibs and lastly, my own parents and grandparents.

      The process helped me change from who I was to the person I should have been all along. And the process is far from over.

      I also want to recognize and thank my office staff, children, sisters and brothers-in-law. They put up with the highs and lows of my journey thru the fire of near-divorce.

      I also want to thank James O’Donnell of O’Donnell Communications, Father Timothy Horner, OSB and Reverend Edward Kleiman for reviewing and correcting either or all the grammar, concepts and theology.

      The book is short because, in the throes of divorce madness, you will not have the energy to read a long book.

      It should also be required reading for couples contemplating marriage, because in the celebrations surrounding getting married, you may not have the good sense to think through the reasons to marry or not marry this intoxicating person.

      Except for particle physics, in the entire universe ½ + ½ = 1; in divorce, the two halves are always far less than the whole.

      Robert A

      Introduction

      Why write this book?

      This book’s objective is to help you think through if you should divorce your spouse. Both spouses should benefit from this analysis. It is written from the perspective of the spouse who was left behind.

      Prospectively, this book may help you decide whom to marry and whom not to marry.

      Despite the trauma and the drama, the occurrence of divorce is a wakeup call to improve who you are, so that you can be happier about you and your marriage. This requires you to reevaluate yourself, your spouse or your intended, and who you want to be in the future, and what resources you may need to change yourself for the better.

      It may be a blessing in disguise that divorce creates financial hardship for all parties, because the change you need to make is not in learning to be a rock star or concert pianist so you can have more fun, money or feel powerful. It is about finding truthfulness, which leads to true peace and happiness by living a life of holiness, which is God’s way. The outcome of that discipline is less anxiety, fear, anger, bitterness and their resultant bad choices. Regardless of your past beliefs and actions, you will only find happiness thru becoming a person of Truth, which is what the Old and New Testament are all about, God’s rules for living.

      A Heartfelt Hug

      To those of you who are contemplating or already in the process of a divorce, if you were the more truthful one in the marriage and if you were right in front of me, I would give you the biggest hug I could. I would reassure you that you are loved by God and everyone else who has already been thru the ‘fire,’ and that your life and your loved ones lives will get better. More than one patient did the same for me…. and it supported me through the pain.

      There will be new rules for you to learn that will make you happy. First, pray, starting with the day the divorce process begins. If you don’t believe in God or don’t know how to pray, then internet search for prayers and start saying them. Don’t worry if you are a declared atheist or under attentive member of

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1