Different Faces
()
About this ebook
Through the shames of guilt of losing everything including herself, realizing the pain she endured might give her a little bit of hope to hold on to.
Marlene Essence Dotts
Tinkerbell Essence Dotts faces different challenges during the path of alcohol & drug addiction. Learning how to fight addiction and addictive ways on her journey to new life.
Related to Different Faces
Related ebooks
Katia Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Swineherd: English & Bulgarian Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Mother: A Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Love to Go to Daycare Обичам да ходя на детска градина: English Bulgarian Bilingual Collection Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsОбичам да си мия зъбите I Love to Brush My Teeth: Bulgarian English Bilingual Collection Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Aeneid Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCold Warriors: Writers Who Waged the Literary Cold War Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Our Mutual Friend Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Galina Petrovna’s Three-Legged Dog Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Rose Stone Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThere Are Places I Remember Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsUlysses: "Think you're escaping and run into yourself. Longest way round is the shortest way home." Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Enter Laughing: A Bio-Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLiving Life as a Writer Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsQuiet Talks About Jesus Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDifferent Faces Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHope I'm Making Sense, Thanks Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMy Journey To Jesus Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWelfare to Wisdom: One Woman's Story Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Woman's Journey to Success Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFlight From Hell In The Heavens Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIt Was Love That Kept Me Going Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsYou Don't Know My Struggle Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsKeep Fighting Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFree Ticket to Heaven Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLove, Life, & Microblading: A Journey of Triumph in the World of Microblading Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhy Me? Not Me?: The New Face of P.T.S.D Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLife Doesn't Have to Be a Sentence: Choose Your Hard Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOut of the Darkness and into the Light: A Psychic's Journey Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Personal Memoirs For You
Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Solutions and Other Problems Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Son of Hamas: A Gripping Account of Terror, Betrayal, Political Intrigue, and Unthinkable Choices Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Why Fish Don't Exist: A Story of Loss, Love, and the Hidden Order of Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything I Know About Love: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Diary of a Young Girl Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5My Story Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Choice: Embrace the Possible Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5A Stolen Life: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Trejo: My Life of Crime, Redemption, and Hollywood Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Hunger: A Memoir of (My) Body Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Causes of Depression – and the Unexpected Solutions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5All the Beauty in the World: The Metropolitan Museum of Art and Me Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Stay Married: The Most Insane Love Story Ever Told Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry Into Values Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Just Mercy: a story of justice and redemption Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Mommie Dearest Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5People, Places, Things: My Human Landmarks Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Stash: My Life in Hiding Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Bad Mormon: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5You Could Make This Place Beautiful: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for Different Faces
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
Different Faces - Marlene Essence Dotts
Different Faces
Copyright © 2020 by Marlene Essence Dotts.
Paperback ISBN: 978-1-952982-07-1
Ebook ISBN: 978-1-952982-08-8
All rights reserved. No part in this book may be produced and transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.
The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Published by Green Sage Agency 07/29/2020
Green Sage Agency
1-888-366-9989
inquiry@greensageagency.com
God grant me the Serenity to accept
the things I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to Know the Difference.
God, I place my hand in yours, and together we can do something good….
I can’t do it alone!
Road to Rehab
It was a hot summer day in July 2018 when I checked myself into a rehab in Paterson, New Jersey. I had never been to a rehab before I left Long Branch, New Jersey, three days earlier. I had left everyone…family, friends, so-called anyhow. When I stepped on to the train, I slowly looked back to wave goodbye to my husband, Chris, who had been sick for some time with heart and renal failure. We had been together since 1996 and married in 2003. We then separated in 2007. We were to go our separate ways. It was in 2007 when life’s challenges happened. I had grandkids being brought into the world. Knowing in my heart that I already failed as a parent, I wanted to be there for my grandkids. I knew my kids would need their mother, so I had to make a choice: get sober or continue to use drugs and alcohol. To make better choices, I needed to be separated from my husband because he was my enabler. He couldn’t tell me, no.
He was a good guy, but on the downside, he could be very mean and abusive. I tried to get sober on my own.
As I was sitting on the train while it was pulling off, I recalled hearing the conductor say, We are now approaching Monmouth Park, and Little Silver is next.
My heart started palpitating, and my eyes began filling with tears. I thought to myself STOP!
I did not want to go through with this. This would be a whole new way of life for me. Part of me knew inside that God would be giving me a new chance to live a more abundant life, but another part of me was afraid to take this leap of faith. I thought to myself, I should just get off in Middletown.
I had an acquaintance, Mr. D, that lived there. I thought he would let me stay there…I could get high…. but i knew that would’ve been a dead end, something kept me on that train. My mind was all over the place. I had already arranged for my daughter, Tiarrah, to meet me in Newark Penn Station. I guess reality started setting in, thinking to myself, How could this happen?
My daughter was taking off work to take me to a rehab, and for me not to show up would be a real disappointment and another slap in her face. I already felt like a failure. Why can’t I just get life right…Why can’t I just live a normal life!
Tears were flowing down my face uncontrollably after passing through Middletown. There was no turning back for me now. I was determined to get my life back, the life i knew i could live, which was, at the time, my main goal, and I thought, the hell with everyone else.
But when I get to penn station Tiarrah’s boyfriend Ray’Quan and Ashley was there to meet me,we get to the rehab Ray’Quan hugged me, Ashley walked me in, I had to give her everything except my clothes we hugged and said our good byes, seeing her walk out those doors to know what I had and needed to do was the right decision for me.
First few days of Rehab…July 2018
I felt lost, angry, and confused. My mind raced with so many thoughts. So much had happened and I didn’t understand why or how did I allow myself to get to this point. All I did know was that I had to go to this fucking Rehab to get my life back. I had lost everything; my apartment, my job, my daughters, and my grandkids. At the time, I didn’t want to accept any blame on my part. I thought to myself, I don’t have a problem; I didn’t hurt anyone…Yeah, I got evicted, lost my apartment, and everything that was on the inside was now on the outside.
I was furious with my landlord for not working with me. I also believed it wasn’t my fault that I didn’t pay rent or didn’t call him to make payment arrangements because, in my mind, I had it all under control. I took all six of my grandkids and one of their friend that lived in the same building as me on a 3-day road trip to Orlando Florida for Christmas, I figured I’ll pay rent when I get back,It all started