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WordsNeverSpoken Chapter1 Hiswatchalarmwentoffandherosefromthebedandbegandressing.Igotupoutofbedand putmyarmsaroundhimandkissedhim."Comebacktonight.Iwantmore." "Youwantmorewhat?"Hehadconcernonhisface. "Justwhatyougavemelastnight."Hegrinnedandnodded. (Thesearethewordsthatchangetheoutcomeofthisonenight) "I'llcallyoulater."Hesoftenedandkissedmeandlefttheapartment. The'deal'turnedouttobeabiggerdealthanIcouldhaveeverimagined.IwashookedandI wantedtorenegotiateforaslongashewouldletme.AboutamonthagoIwaschasingbail jumperEddieDeChoochwhowastraffickingcontrabandcigarettesalloverTrentonandthen shotanoldladyandleftherinashedforwormfood. WhenIfoundoutmyGrandmaMazurwasinvolvedandthingswerespiralingoutofcontrol,I askedforRanger'shelp.Heshockedmebyaskingforonenightinmybedforhishelp.Iagreed. Nobrainer.Howhardwouldthatbe?

HewasthehottestthingwearingpantsthatIhadeverlaid eyesonandIhadsecretlyalwayswantedtoknowwhatitwouldbeliketosleepwithasuper hero. Ihadbeendatingorlet'srephrasethatscrewingJoeMorrellisinceIclearedhisnameand savedhisjobwiththeTPDawhileback.Ican'trememberhimtakingmeonadateordoingany ofthethingsboyfriendswholoveyouusuallydo.DateswereatPino'sPizzaorinfrontoftheTV watchingballgamesfollowedbyplayfulandsatisfyingyethurriedboutsofsex.Therestofthe time,hegrouchedatmeovermychoiceofcareerandmylevelofcompetenceindoingit.We hadbrokenuprecentlyandhey,Iwasafreewoman. Ontheotherhand,Rangerwasmymentorandhadneverwaveredinhissupportofmeandmy job.HewasalwaysthereandwhenIcalled,hecame.Omigoodness,didhecomelastnight.I hadtoshakemyheadtoclearthememories.Themanwasmagicandhehadworkedthat magiconmybodyandIwashooked.Imadeavowlastnightanditwasthattherewouldnever beanyoneelseforme.Meandmy'doodah'hadmadeapact.Mydoodahwasfarfromgirlscout materialbutstillI'mBurg.Ihadanideahowtogetamanandthismanwillbemine! IshoweredanddressedandfedRexakibbleandheadedtothebondsoffice.Iwalkedinand bothgirlslookedatmeandgrinned.Lulasmirked,"What?DidMorrelliinvestinawinduptoy? Iblushed."Hellno!" Conniesaid,"Oh,thisisgoingtobegood.Spillitgirl!" "Nope.But,Ineedtoknowhowtolureamanandlockhimdown.Thebiggunsgirls.Iwantthis man." "Holyshit!Themetaphor,It'sBatman!" Connieaskedwithpleadingeyes,"Yougotatasteofthemaninblack?" "Omigod,I'mstillfeelingtheaftershocks",Isquealed. "Shit!"

"Doubleshit!" "Tripleshitandfuckaduck!"Vinniepokedhisheadoutofhisoffice. "Ewww!Vinnieyoupervert!Whereisthatfuckingbug",Connieyelledandbeganpickingup itemsonherdeskandstompinglikeshewasunderanantattack. Assickashewas,LulaandIburstoutlaughing. Lulagrabbedmyhand,"Youdating,what'sthescoop?" "Notreallysure.Wedidn'treallycommittoanything.Justonenightofsex." "Okayseriouslygirl,wasitgood?Youwantmoreofthat?" "Ohhellyes!Preferablyeverynight." "ThenweneedaBatPlan." Igiggled,"Whatdoyousuggestbasedonyourexpertise?" "Girl!Thisisseriousshit.Wehavetoplanyourattackverycarefully."Connienoddedfuriously. "Okayfirst,tothePleasureTreasuresandthentothemall!" "What?" "Yeah,girlfriend.Yousaidityourself.Youneedthebigguns."Gulp IstoodonthesidewalkoutsideofthePleasureTreasuresandglaredatLula."I'mprettydamn surethatthepervertguyoverbytheDVDsectionsnappedacellphotoofusatthecheckout counterwiththisbigloadofkinkyshitinthisbagspreadoutalloverandmymotherwillbecalling shortly!"JustthenEltonJohn's'TheBitchisBack'ringtonesounded.IleveledamorelethalBurg glareatLula.Shewhimperedalittleandshrankback.Iputmyphoneonspeakersoshecould sharethiswithme. "Hello?" "StephanieMichellePlum,Youhaveembarrassedmeyetagain!" "Asusual..Sorrybout'that." "Ijustgottwophonecallsandmycallwaitingisstillgoingoff.Whycan'tyoushopatnormal storesfornormalstuff?Whatdoyouneedthatstufffor?" "UhUndercoverwork.YeahIneeditforaspecialjob?"IgaveLulaathumbsup.Thatwasa prettygoodone.Underthecoversforsure.Snicker.Iheardastruggle,cursewordsandthena thump. "HiStephiegirl." "HiGrandma." "Areyoustillthere?Canyoupickmeupapairofthosecandypanties?Getthecherryflavored.A pairofthembenwaballstoexercisemycooterand"Ohgack!Lulachuckled. "HoldonaminuteGrandma.Lulayougotapenandpaper?Writethisdown." "GoaheadGrandma." "Ohokay.Ineedaboxofcondomstoo.Dotheycomeinsizes?Ireckon'iftheyhavedinky,just getthatsize.Wilbur'snotwhatheusedtobebut,dinkyornotIwastoldallittookwasonesquirt togetagirlpreggersbackintheday.Agirlcan'tbetoocareful."Doublegack!ThistimeLulahad agrimaceonherfaceandit'shardtogrossoutanexho. "OkayGrandmagotit.Gottogo"Idisconnectedbeforeanotherwordcameoutofhermouth.I thinkIhadalreadypukedalittleinmymouth. IslappedacouplebillsinLula'shandandsaid,"You'regoingbackintogetthis." "Ineversawnodinkysizecondomsbefore.Probablyhaveta'specialorder"

"Lula!Itdon'tmatter!Thatuterusprolapsed,drugthegroundanddroppedofflikearusted mufflertwentyyearsago!" Myphonerangagain."What?" "Babe,didyouaccidentallyhityourpanicbutton?"Iheardpealsoflaughterinthebackground. "No,why?" "Yourlocationisflashingandyourtransmittingsound."Icouldheartheamusementinhisvoice. "Forhowlongexactly?" "Awhile.Whenweheardthatyoudidn'tsoundlikeyouwereindistresswellindangeranyway, wewaitedtosendoutateam." "Howmanyheardthis?"Istillheardsnickersandhowlsinthebackground. "Prettymucheveryoneonduty.Theysawthephotoaswell.Babe,mayIsuggestacouple additionstothatbagofgoodies?" "Ohforcryin'Ohfuckoff.YoutellyourmerrygangofgoobersthatIsaidfunnyyeahhaha. Revengewillbeswiftandpainfulandmoreembarrassingthanthis.Mystungunisgoingtobe chargedandready!"Ihunguponhimandgrowledatthephone.IlookedatLula."Sowhat'syour nextbigbrightidea?" Ifishedthepanicbuttonoutofmypurseandstompedit.Lulasaid,"Minorsetback.We'restillon amission.WetakecareofyourGrannyandheadtothemall.Weneedeverythingsexy." "Lula,theenemyknowsmyplannowandIcan'taffordeverythingsexy.We'vebeeninfiltrated." "Ithinkweneedtostopatthelibraryandcheckoutthatbook,youknow'TheArtofWar'.Thisis aseriousmission." "Shit.Okay.Iguessforlackofanyothersaneidea,we'llgetthefriggin'book." Weshoppedwithinmymeansandthenwegotchinesetakeouttogetinthemoodandsettledin atmyapartmenttoreadthe'ArtofWar'. "Okaygirl.Warislikefire""Gotmyassburnedtoday." "Laydownyourarmsortheycanbeusedagainstyou""Stompedtheshitoutofthatsucker." "Fightthewarswiftlyanddon'tallowtheenemytoturnthewarinhisfavorhmm.""Duh.Don't handtheenemyyourwarplanonasilverplatter." "Forthevictor,capturethestate...""Iplantocapturethewholeflagpoleandflymyownflag." "Positionyourarmytodealwithquickandchangingconditions...""Yeah,likewhattodowhen yougetcaughtlookinglikeanidiot." "Planyourmovesinacontrolledenvironment...""Yep,likedon'tgetyourpictureontheinternet shoppingforcrotchlesspantiesandfuzzyhandcuffs." "Last,youneedsometrainin'girlfriend." "Whatkindoftraining?" "Kicksomeasstrainin'girl." "Let'sfindsomehottietoteachussomekungfu'shit." Wegotthephonebookout.Lulawasgoingdownthelist,"Kungfushitkungfushit." "Lula,it'snotgoingtobelistedunderthatname.Givemethat." Iwentdownthepageandreadtheads."HmmmTheDirtyDozen,Twelvenastyfighting techniquesforanyselfdefensesituation.Thatsoundspromising." Lulasaid,"Doesitinvolvehairpulling?...""Yep" "Fingerpokesandscratching""Yep"

"Biting.""Yep." "That'stheonegirl.Bookit." Icalledandsignedusuptobegintonight.Ispeeddialedone."Yo." "Yo,toyou." "Wereyoureallyplanningoncomingovertonight.Ihaveaheadache."Ilied. "Isthatright?I'llbringsomefoodandmedicinethen." "Nope.Notnecessary.Ihavetovisitmyparents.Mightjustsleepthere."Igrimacedatthat whopper. "SleepgoodthenBabe." "Youtoo." LulaandIwenttotheCluckinaBucketandpiggedoutbeforewewenttotheselfdefense class.Turnsoutthisguywasnotfunnin'.Hewasabadass,armyspecialforcesveteran.He wasgivenanassignmentforhisfellowGreenBeretsandArmyRangersanditwasthisclass andthesemoves...Noshit? Thegoalwastogivesoldiersahandfulofhardcoretechniquesthatcouldeasilybelearned, easilymasteredandeasilyappliedinanyclosecombatsituation.Twelvetechniques,shockingly brutalandfastandeffective.Hellyeah.Wecanlearntheseandgeticecreamafterwards. Withintwentyminutes,theinstructorguy,JerryGordonwasstandingoverourpitifuloutofshape carcassesglaringatus."Whatexactlydoyoutwopukeswantoutofthisclass?"Hewas bellowingatus.Pukes?WellIresentthat.Althoughthatfriedchickeninmystomachwasn't settlingtoogoodrightnow.Iopenedmymouthtospeakandbarfedrightonhisboot.Lula gaggedandbackedaway.Wayback. Hegrabbedmebymyyogapantsandunderwearandcarriedmebymyasstohisoffice.How embarrassing!Hetookapapertowelandscrubbedthepukeoffhisfootintothegarbagecan andlookedatme.Iwasbusytryingtoremovehisspecialforceswedgiefromhellfrommybutt crack."Whyareyouhere?" "Iwanttolearnsomemoves." "Bullshit.Therealreason.I'malsotrainedtorecognizebullshitwhenIseeit." "Whatdoesbullshitlooklikesir?Iseenobull.Therefore,Iseenobullshit." "Ms.Plum,youdonotwantmetolosemypatience.WHYAREYOUHERE?"Heroaredatme. "Okayokay.Don'tgetyourboxersinabunch.Wereadthebook'ArtofWar'andIwantedto learnsomemovestomaybetacklemysorta'boyfriendandI'mabountyhuntertooandI'mtired ofgettinghumpedbypacksofdogs,rollingingarbageandwrestlingnakedoldpeople.Iwould likealittlebitmorecontrolinmylifeandmyjob." Hesurprisedmeandlaughedoutloud."Whoisyoursortofboyfriend?""UmRangerManoso." Hiseyesbecamewide."He'sinTrenton?" "Yes."Helaughed. "Fuckingsmallworldmyyoungpadawan.Howseriousareyouaboutlearning?" "UhIthinkprettyserious." "Youwanttowhiphimintosubmission?" "Uhyeahexactlythat." "BringhimtohisCubanknees?" "Hellyes."

"Makehimgrovelatyourfeet?" "Fuckyes!" "Okay.ThenyouwilldoeverythingthatItellyoutodo.Allornothing!" "AllSir!"Hegrinned. TBC YouguyslikemyRanger?Picturehimwiththelonghair.Hebesmokinghotorwhat? Previously"Okay.ThenyouwilldoeverythingthatItellyoutodo.Allornothing!" "AllSir!"Hegrinned. WarningMildSmut Chapter2 "Tobegin,youwillruneverymorningat0700foratotaloffourmiles.Twomilestoyour destinationandtwomilesback.Youwillnoteatfastfoods,confections,orsugarydrinks.Youwill eatleanmeat,freshfruitsandvegetables,grainsandhealthydairyproductsanddrinklotsof water." "Uhsir,confectionsanddrivethrusaretheonlyfoodgroupsIknow.WheredoIcomebythese fruitsandvegetablesandgrainsandleanmeats.You'renotgoingtomakemewhackmyown chickensandshitareyou?" "HowthehelldidyouendupwithRanger.Hesufferbraindamageinthelineofdutyor something?" "Iresentthatsir.HethinksI'mamusing." "Nodoubt.Poordumbfucker.Thesetechniqueswon'tdoyouabitofgoodunlessyouget yourselfinshape.Don'tevenbethinkingaboutcheating.You'llbegettingyourfingerprickedand pissingonastickeverynighttocheckyourbloodsugarandketosislevels.Comprende?" "Jeez,okaysir",Isnarked. WewalkedbackoutandhereadtheriotacttoLulatoo.Wewalkedoutofclasswithourtails betweenourlegs."GotanymorebrightideasLula?" "Thatdudecoulduseadoughnutandaenemaorsomethin'.He'sagrouchyfucker." "Arewegoingtotrythisorwhat?" "Iguesswecouldtryforaweek."IdroppedLulaoffandheadedtomyapartment.AssoonasI gotintobed,Iheardmylockstumbling.Shit.IforgotabouttheGPSandIliedtoRanger.Iclosed myeyestight.Iheardtherustleofclothingandthenfeltthebedsag."Iknowyou'reawakeand you'reuptosomethingBabe.ThewheelssqueakinginyourheadareasloudasRex'swheel." "Areyouspyingonme?WhatifIhadadatetonight?Youjustcamerightin." "Youdidn't.Youhadaheadacheremember?Whereisthebag?"Hebrushedhishandovermy breast. "Bag?" "YourgoodybagfromthePleasureTreasures."Heranhishanddownmystomach. "Nuh..uh.Nowaybusterareyoulookinginthatbag."Ohshithishandslidinsidemypantiesand stoppedrightbeforehehitthetarget.MaybeifIscootupacoupleinches.Istartedwigglingand hishandclampeddownonme. "Youdidn'tmakethosepurchasestosharewithmeBabe?"

"I'mnotsaying.Theenemygottheirhandsontoomuchinformationtodayalready."Hechuckled asIbegantowiggleupwardsagain. "Theenemy?AmItheenemy?" "Allyou'regettingisname,rankandcerealnumber."Helaughed. "That'sserialandIcanmakeyoutalkBabe."Herolledmeonmybackandmovedhisfingers thoselasttwoinchesandbeganmassagingmysensitivelittlenub.Helickedmylipsandgave measmolderingkiss,thenlickedtheshellofmyearandsuckedtheearlobebeforebitingdown andsuckingmyneckrightbeforeIwasabouttoclimaxandthenhestopped.What? "Whydidyoustop?" "Talktome." "Ican'ttalk.Ican'teventhinkrightnow." "TalkandI'llgiveyouwhatyouwant." "No.I'lldoitmyselfthen."Imovedmyhanddowntofinishthejobhestartedandhegrabbedit andsnappedafuzzyhandcuffaroundmywristandthenraisedmyhandsovermyheadand lockedtheotherwristin. Iwasshocked."Youbrokeinmycarandwentthroughthebag?" Hepushedmyshirtupandtookaswollennippleinhismouthandsuckedit."YesIdid.We'll discusstheitemsyouboughtlater.Whatisacopyofthe'ArtofWar'doinginyourcar?" "LetmerunsomerandomwordsbyyouRanger,intrusive,invasive,meddlesome,nosy, presumptuous,prying,snoopy"Hetookmymouthandslidhistongueinsideandrolledontop ofmeandbegantorubhiserectionhardagainstme.TheclimaxbegantobuildagainandI moanedandrightbeforeIwasabouttogetmyrelease,hefuckingdiditagain.Rolledrightoff me. "Noyoudidn't!" "Talk." "No."Herolledoutofbedanddressedandstartedoutthedoor. "Ohsonowyou'releaving.I'mhandcuffedhere.Sowho'splayinggamesnow?"Hejustkept walkingandthedoorclosedandhewasgone.Dammit. Goodthinghedidn'tlockmetoanythingatleast.Igotupandturnedonthelightandlooked aroundforthekey.Wentinthelivingroomandkitchenandchecked.Crap.Islidonsomeshoes andgrabbedmycarkeys.IwentouttomycarandgrabbedthePleasureTreasuresbag.Onthe waybacktomyapartment,brightcarlightsflashedonme.Istompedovertothecar."Giveme thedamnkey!" Istoppeddeadshortofthecar.Shit!ItwasCarlCostanzaandBigDogintheirpolicecruiser. Carlwassnickering."WewerejustcruisingthroughStephanie.Lookslikethetimingwas perfect." "Ohshutit!Sinceyou'rehereyoucanmakeyourselfuseful.Doyouhavesomekindofuniversal handcuffkey?" BigDoglaughed."What'sinthebagSteph?" "Noneofyourbeeswax.Nowareyougoingtohelpmeornot?" Carlgotoutwithakeyandreachedformyhands."Morrellicuffyouordidyoujusttrytheseon forsize?" "Nosmartass.Morrelli'snothere."Igrabbedthecuffsandshovedtheminmybagandreached

outandgrabbedhiskey."I'mkeepingthisandthanks.Thereisnobodyhere." Carllookedatthebag."Oh,Igetit.Yougotoneofthemfakedingersintheredon'tyou?Going forthewholesolofantasythinghugh?" "No!Degenerate.Nowgofunnyguys."Theywerebothguffawing. BigDogsaid,"Nicepj's.Ilikethebunnywabbits."Shit,IforgotIwaswearingboysshortsanda tankandmyasswasprobablyhangingouttherejiggling.Ihuffedandturnedandstompedback tomyapartmentandslammedthedoor. At7AMtherewasaloudbangingatmydoor.Ihadhitmysnoozealarmabouttentimes.Iwent tothedoorandopenedit.Lulaglaredatme."You'renotevenreadyyetgirl.Thisisjustbullshit!" "WhatisitwithyouandGordonandbullshit?Givemeaacoupleminutes." "Wewereoutthedoorinfiveminutesandhuffingtowardanearbypark.Whenwegottothe park,Lulasaid,"Okaysohowmanymileswasthat?" "Zero.Wewon'thaveamiledoneuntilwegetallthewayaroundthisduckpond." "Areyoushittin'megirl?Howwesupposedtoknowhowmanymileswerunnin'." "Weneedtogetusoneofthosepedometerthings.Let'sjustkeepgoingaroundtheparkuntilwe can'trunanymore.Today,thatwillprobablybeinyardsnotmiles."Wewentaroundtheduck pondtwomoretimesandLulawascomplainingaboutcramps."Don'trunnerssupposedto stretchorwarmuporsomething.Igotacrampinmyass." "Let'sheadbackfortodayLula.I'maboutdonetoo." Wegrabbedbottlesofwaterandcollapsedonmycouch."Sowhatarewegoingtodotoday?" "We'llseeifConnie'sgotskipsandwe'llgetoneofthosepedometerthings.Gordonwasjust rude.Hethinkswecan'tdothisandIwanttoshowhissmugassotherwise.Heactuallysaid Rangermusthavesufferedbraindamagetobewithme."Lulaburstoutlaughing.Irolledmy eyes. LulaandIhadcereal,bananaandjuiceforbreakfastandIevenwentlightonsugarinmycoffee. Aftersheleft,ItookashowerandfedRexandheadedtothebondsoffice.Conniewasreadinga newCosmo.Iturnedmyheadtolookatsomethingonthecover.'Tenstepstogettingyourguy andkeepinghim.' "HeyCon,Idefinitelywanttoborrowthatwhenyou'redonewithit.Gotanyskips?" "Gotone."Shepushedafoldertome. AsIwasreadingthefile,thedooropenedandmyneckbegantotingle.Hewrappedhishand aroundthebackofmyneck."Babe." "MorningRanger."HehandedConniesomebodyreceiptsandtoldConniehewouldbebackina fewminutes."AwordMs.Plum."Hewasguidingmeouttothealley. "Gonna'feelmeupandthenleaveagain?" "Babe,youhavebeenlyingtomesincethedealwasconsumated?Why?" "That'snottrue.ActuallyIliealot.I'mgoodatit.Youjustdon'tcatchme.Ilietoyouonaverage onceortwiceaweek" "Babe.Youdidn'tgotoyourparentshouseandyoudidn'thaveaheadachelastnight.Whydid youlie?" "Iusedtohaveathingcalledprivacy.Everhearofit?" "Areyouuncomfortablewithmenow?" "No."

"Didyouhaveaproblemwiththatnight?" "Nope.Itwasokay." "Itwasokay.Ifitwasjustokaythenweneedtoworkonourtechniquesomemore."Hemovedin andplacedhisthighbetweenmylegsandrubbedagainstme. "Ithinkthedebtispaid.Youcan'tusesexagainstmetomakemedothings.So,stopbeingaa pussyteaser."Helaughed. "You'reright.Thereisnomoredebt.Nopriceforwhatwegiveeachothereveragain.Doyou wanttotalkaboutanything?" "Nope."Hepulledmychinuptolookinmyeyesandkissedme. "CanIcomeseeyoutonight?" "I'msorrybut,Ireallydohaveplanseverynightthisweekuntiltheweekend." Hesmirked,"Morrelli." "No.RangerwewerefuckbuddiesforonenightandIdon'thavetotellyoumybusiness.Arewe finishedhere?"Hisblankfacewentupandhesteppedawayfromme.BoyIsuredohopeI'm playingthisright.IjustneedtokeephiminaholdingpatternuntilIgetmyrealplanstogether.I don'tknowwhatthehellI'mdoing.Helikesmybait.Ijusthavetolearnhowtoreelhiminwithout losinghim.IgavehimafingerwaveandwalkedbacktothebondsofficetowaitforLula. Wecouldn'tfindourskip,Barney.Wewentbythemallandwindowshoppedinsteadandfound apedometerandateahealthylunchofgrilledchicken,appleandberrysaladwithraspberry vinegrettedressing.Myyumyumswerelessenthusiaticbutstillitwasprettygood.Atleastthe pecansontopweresugared. Lulawastheonegroaningandmakingafaceaftereverybite.Ilookedather."Yougoingtobe okaygirl?Youwanttotrysomethingelse?" "No,butIexpectmybodyisgonna'gointosepticshockorsomeshitfromeatin'thisrabbitfood." Shesighed."I'mtryin'girl.IputsomecarrotsandapplesandbananasinmybagandI'mmakin' itsofar." "Lu,weshouldbereallyproudofourselves.Wedidgoodourfirstday.Givemefivechick."Slap. "Yeah,girl." LuladrovetothefightstudiothatnightbecauseIknewIwasbeingtracked.Truetohisgrouchy word,Gordonmadeuspeeonastickanddrewbloodfrombothofus.Lulamadesureevery personintheroomsawherbooboo.Hecameoutwithagrinonhisfaceandcommencedto tortureusfortwolonghours.Wedraggedourassestohercarandbacktomineatthebonds officeandIdrovehome. Iwassotired,Icouldn'tdoanythingbut,makeastraightshottomybedandfallin.Nodreaming, notossing,justlightsout. ThesnoozewasbeepingandIswattedatitandcursed.Andslowlygotupandshuffledtothe bathroom.WhenLulaknockedIwasready.Weslowlyjoggedofftotheparkwithourpedometer andheadedaroundtheduckpond.SheaskedmetwodozentimeshowfarwehadgonebeforeI saidjusttwomiles.Shegroanedandwekeptgoinguntilwehitanotherhalfmileandweheaded home.Isaid,"BabystepsLu.We'llgetthere." Wemadebigfatomeletsandhadsomefruittoo.Weweresurprisedthatwewerefullandkind ofenergeticafterourmeal.Ithinkwejustmightfindourgroove.WesnatchedBarneythatday withouttoomuchhassleandpattedourselvesonthebackandtooktherestofthedayoff.Iread

Connie'sCosmothatafternoonandwasn'ttoomuchthewiser.Noneofthatcrappolawasgoing toworkonBatman.WheredoIfindanarticlefor'Howtogetasuperheroandkeephim'. TBC WarningSmutAlert Chapter3 Thenexttwodayswentthesame.Alittlefurthereverymorningwhenwejogged,findingfoods welikedtofillusandmakeushappyandgoingtoclassatnight.IcouldtellthatGordonwas surprisedandpleasedatourprogress.OnFridaynightheaskedusifwewouldliketogoeat Japanesewithhimatahibachiplacecloseby.Hesaidhewasproudofus.Wedidn'thaveplans andtoldhimsure. Wehadablast.Thechefentertainedusandcookedthemealrightinfrontofuswithtrickyknife movesandweclappedandate.Weallgotsomethingdifferentsowecouldtryeachother'sdish. ThefoodwasoutstandingandGordontoldusthatitwasallmostlyhealthy.Thatnightweformed arealbondwithGordonandhuggedhimandkissedhimonthecheekbeforeleaving.Ithinkwe secretly'amuse'himtoobut,grumpywouldneveradmitit. Ididn'thearathingfromRangerovertheweekend.Silence.FunnythingwasthatIwasn'tso concernedaboutit.LulaandIkeptourroutineandeverydayIfeltstrongerandnowIfeltlikeI wantedtodothisforme. Mondaycamewithusalmostmakingfourmiles.Gordonhadfinallyexplainedabouttherunning. Inshortburststreetfighting,thebreathingandstaminaisimportant.Joggingandcardiotype workoutsarebesttoimproveyourstaminasothatyoudon'tcrashfromtheadrenalinrush beforethefightisover.Hemadeveryclearthathewastalkingaboutsomeonethatmightreally wanttodousharm. WehadtakenthreeskipsdownbyTuesdaywithminimalissuesandturnedthemintotheTPD. Thecopslittlelotterywasallscrewedup.Acarhadn'tblownupinawhileandwecameinclean asawhistlefromheadtotoe. OnWednesday,LesterandHalfromRangemanwereatthecopshopwhenwewereleaving. Theyeyeduscuriously."Heyguys,"Isaid. "Howyoudoingbeautiful?Youtwoarelookinggood." "I'mcoolandthanks."LulaandIlookedateachotherandgrinnedandhighfived."Damnskippy. Seeyouboyslater." Weleftthemwithfunnylooksontheirfaces. BeforenoononThursdayIwasbackatmyapartmentwithanicestackofcashinmyhandfora changeandIwassohappyIwantedtothrowitonthebedandrollaroundinthemoneynaked whenIheardthelockstumble.Myneckwastingling.Ialreadyknewwhowasthere.Iwasminus loadsofsugartimeshugenumbersandhormonaltimesthesame.Iwashornyashellandan opportunitytoscratchtheitchhadjustarrived! Irantothefoyerandjumpedhim,slamminghimtothewall.Hegruntedandpulledmecloserfor akiss.Islammedhimtotheoppositewallandwrappedmylegsaroundhim."DamnBabe." "I'vebarelyhadsugarinoveraweekandyouarethecasualty.I'mSorry.Takemetothe bedroomnow.Movesoldier.Fuckme!Don'tthinkjustdo."

Hewaswalkingbuthehadquestions."Whatdoesthelackofsugarhavetodowithfucking?"I pulledhisshirtoverhishead. "Itaffectsmyhormones.Igethornyanditgetsreallybad."Hebrokeoutinafullonwolfgrin. "Verygoodtoknow.Whyareyouoffsugar?" "Justeatinghealthier."Heraisesaneyebrowanddropsmeonthebed. HedropshisutilitybeltandlayshisgunonthenightstandandpullsouthisphoneandtellsRam toheadbacktoRangemanandbringhimacar.Igrabbedhisbeltbuckleandunzippedhimas he'skickingoffhisboots.IpulledoffmyshirtandIunzippedmyjeansandRangerpulledthem therestofthewayoff.Ireachedandgrabbedhimdowntomewhilehewasstillpullinghissocks offandhechuckled. "You'renotgoingtoteasemethistime.I'mwarningyouifyoueventryI'llpickupyourgunthere andshootyouwithit."Helaughed. "NoBabe.I'mdefinitelynotgoingtoteaseyou."Hesnappedthehookonmybraandtooka breastinhismouthashewaspullingitoff.Heranhishanddownmysideandgraspedmyass andgraspedmypantiesandbeganpullingthemdownandthenranhishandbackupmylegand raisedupandlookedatme. "Yourbodyisleanerandmoretoned.Whathaveyoubeendoingalongwiththediet?" "Mmm..Idon'tknowwhatyou'retalkingabout."Hesmackedmyasshard."Oww!" "You'relyingtomeagainBabe." "Rangerskipthequestionsandtheforeplaythistime.Putitinandfuckmeplease." "Letmeseeifyou'rereadyforme."Hegavemyclitalittlerubandthenmovedafingerinmeand thenstuckitinhismouthandsucked."MmmYoutasteready."Thatwassosexy.Igrabbed himandcrashedmylipstohistastingmyselfinhismouth.Herubbedhisbigthrobbingcock againstmyclitteasingme. "NoteasingRanger."Ismackedhishandawayandreacheddownandgrabbeditandsqueezed itandstroked.Hegaspedandgroaned."See?Doesn'tfeelsogreatdoesit?Ormaybeitdoes." ThenIplaceditatmyentranceandslammedmyhipsupward.Itookallteninchesinonestroke andthenIgroundmyhipsagainsthim. Sweatpoppedoutonhisforehead."DamnBabe!You'regoingtokillme.Ialmostcameinthat onestroke."Igavehimawickedgrinandclampeddownonmymusclesandsqueezedhim hard.Ithinkhiseyeslostfocusandhismouthflewopen."Aaaagh.Stop.Givemejustaminute." Iwasincontrol.'WarisLikeFire'.IhadBatman'sloinslituplikeabonfire.DamnIhadhimby theshorthairsliterally.Thiswasfun! Whenhiseyesstartedtofocus,Ipulledmyhipsdownandslammeduptowardhimagainand again."I'lltellyouwhentocumRangerandIwantmynameonyourlipsbecauseIownyourass rightnow.You'remine!"Heclosedhiseyes.IkeptslammingupwarduntilIfeltthetingleandthe heatspreadingandmythighsbegantoquiver."Cumnow!"Iyelledandcamealmostviolently withmypentuphormonesragingandIsqueezedhimhard. "Dios,Stephanie!"Heyelledoutloud.Ifelthisreleaseandspasmsinsideofmeandhedidn't stop.Hewouldspasmandgroanandspasmagain.Finallyhestoppedandslumpedontopof mebreathinghardandstilltwitchingalittleinsideme.Hedidn'tseeitbut,Ihadasatisfiedgrinon myfaceandaneviltwinkleinmyeye. "Whenyoucanmovesweetie,rolloffmebecauseI'msquished."Heraisedhisheadandlooked

atmeandgrinnedandrolledover.Hewasstillbreathinghard. "Babewegotta'getalittlesugarbackinyourdiet.Youcouldkillanarmyofmenrightnow.You wereright.Youdidjustownmyass." Heturnedandpulledmetohimandkissedme."I'mgladIstoppedby." "WhyareyouhereBatman?"Irubbedmyhandsdownhisbacktohiscutetightassand tweakedit,exploring.Hispenisbegantomoveagain. "Babe." "You'reBatman.Iknowyoucangoatleasttwotimes."Irolledontopofhimandstraddledhim.I grabbedhislengthandslidmyhandsdownandreachedbehindmeandtookhisballsinmy handandgentlysqueezed."Batmantheseareconsiderablylighterthantheywereearlier." "I'llbet.Younearlydrainedmedryyouwickedlittlevamp.BabeIcametoaskyoutogotoMiami withmeforacoupledays." "Businessorpleasure?" "Both." "What'stheratiobetweenthebusinessandthepleasure?"Iraisedupandtookhiminsideme andbegantoslowlymove.Heclosedhisbeautifuleyesforafewsecondsandopenedthem. "Howaboutthirtybusinessandseventywillbeourpleasure?" "Deal.Whatarewegoingtodo?"Ibegantomovefasterandmassagehisballsharderwhile tweakinghisnippleswiththeotherhand. Hewasbreathinghardernow."Distraction.MiamihasfinallyhiredawomanandIwantyouto trainher." "Okay.When?" "Wewouldleavetomorrow."Hebegantorublittlecirclesaroundmyclitandwasmatchingmy rhythmwithhiships.Iwasnowbreathinghard.Rangergrabbedmyhipsandmovedmetoward himafractionandIinstantlyfeltthedifference.HewasputtingmorepressureonmygspotandI gasped.Hegrinned. "GoodmoveBatman.Ihavesomethingtodotomorrownightbut,IguessIcanskipitforone night." "Whathaveyoubeendoingeverynightoftheweekandwhoareyoudoingitwith?" Ileaneddownandkissedhim."Jealous?" "Letmemakesomethingclear.Idon'twantyoudoingthiswithanyotherman."Hepinchedmy clit."Thisisminefornow.Doyouunderstand?"OhboydidIever.GuessI'mgoingtobe'laying downmyarms'soonerratherthanlater.Hejerkedmedownonhimafewmoretimeshardand webothyelledoutourorgasm.Islumpedtohischestandherubbedgentlecirclesonmyback. "Okay.Ithinkthiswillholdmeforalittlewhile."Hischestshookashechuckled. "Let'sshowerandI'lltakeyoutolunch." "Okay.Ineedtogetamanipediandadoodahwaxforthetripafter.Gotta'bebikiniready.We aregoingtothebeach?"Hegrinnedatme. "YeahBabe.We'llbestayingonthebeach." "Ohgoody.Let'sgo."Igrabbedhishandandweheadedtotheshower. HewasshockedfirstwhenIpassedonPino'sandthenagainwhenweweresittinginadiner andIorderedthechickensaladandfruitwithwater."Igotta'tellyou,youlookbeautifulandyou're glowing.Thesechangesthatyou'vemadeareshowing.I'mproudofyouBabe."Myheartjustdid

alittleflipflop.Nowthismadeitallworthit. "Thanks.YouknowI'msurprisedathowmuchmoreenergyIhave.I'mtryingnewfoodsand findingstuffIreallylike.Thesugaristhehardestpartbecauseofwhatthelackofitdoestome." "We'lltrytoworkthatoutBabe.Evidentlyyouaregoingtoneedit.Therearehealthysugarsand eatingadessertnowandthenwon'thurtyou.Whatmadeyoudecidetomakethechanges?" DidIwanttodothisnowornot.Hehadkindofhintedatacommitmentofsomekindearlier. "You." Heraisedaneyebrow."Me?Why?" "ThenextmorningafterwedidthedealIwokeupcaringaboutwhatyoureallythoughtofme. That'sallI'msaying."Hestudiedmyfaceforafewsecondsandreachedhishandoutandtook mineandsqueezedit."I'mhonoredyoufeltthatway.That'scertainlyaresultofthatnightI wouldn'thaveexpected." AtthatmomentIheardsomeoneclearinghisthroatandtherestoodJoeMorrelliwithhishands onhiships.Helookeddownatourhandsandlookedupatmyface.Hewasfurious. Hespat,"Iguessthismeanswe'renotgettingbacktogetherthistime.Soyou'refuckingManoso now?Nobigsurprise.Ican'tbelieveyouwaitedthislongordidyou?" Rangerleveledaglareathimandspokecalmly."WatchyourselfMorrelli.Shenevercheatedon youandyouarenotgoingtoembarrassorhumiliateherinpublic.Doweunderstandeach other?"Joenoddedandstompedawayandleftthediner.Ilookeddown.Myherowasstillholding myhand.Hesurprisedmebybringingmyhandtohislipsandkissingit.Wow!Thiswassonot Rangerlikeandinpublictoo.IwasapuddleofgooMytroopswouldbedissapointed. Think..thinkdammit!Um..'FighttheWarSwiftlyandDon'tAllowtheEnemytoTurntheWarin HisFavor'. Shit!Ipulledmyhandfromhisandsaid,"Um..thanksforthatbut,Icanfightmyownbattles.Are wereadytogo?"Igotupandbeganwalkingwithoutabackwardglanceandswayingmyhipsas Iwent.Workit..workit..ownit.Iwaschannelingmy'PrettyWoman'.Iheardachucklebehind me."Babe,I'mgoingtohavetoorderabagoffriesonthewayouttogowiththatshake."Iwas grinning.Thatwassocheesyandcute.Cripes!IthinkIjustgotthewarmandfuzzies. Regroup..regroup. TBC Previously "Babe,I'mgoingtohavetoorderabagoffriesonthewayouttogowiththatshake."Iwas grinning.Thatwassocheesyandcute.Cripes!IthinkIjustgotthewarmandfuzzies. Regroup..regroup. Chapter4 Hetookmebacktomyapartmenttogetmycarandkissedmelongandpassionate.Woof!I wantedtobringhimtoheelatmywarmandjuicy..mindoutoftheguttergotstufftodo.Ishooed himawayandheadedtomycar.IcalledLula."Meetmeatthebondsoffice." "104.Onmyway."Isnappedmyphoneshut. Lulawasstandingnexttohercarwithherarmscrossed."So?What'sup?" "RangercametomyapartmentandIattackedhimandnearlyfuckedhimdeadbecauseI

haven'thadsugarforalmosttwoweeks.Iprobablyshouldhaveaneonwarningsignstucktome orsomething.ItshouldhaveabigpenisonitwithabigXoveritmeaningifyouhaveoneof thesestayaway." "Whataboutthelittleones?""Littlewhatones?" "Yougotsomethin'againstthelittlepenises?Theycan'thelpitcause'theylittle.BackwhenI wasa..." "Lula!Howdidwegetonthesubjectofsmallpenises?Iwasn'tjusttalkingabout...Imeant all...sometimes...Ohforgetit." "Batman'sallthathmmm?" "Lula?"Thenlookingathersmirkygrin,Ihadtogrin."Okay,he'sallthatandabagofchipstoo." "Damngirl,Iknewit!Youknowyounotsupposedtobefornicatin'withtheenemy.You'renot propertrainedyet!" "IthinkhekindofmadeaRangercommitmenttome.HetoldMorrellioffandaskedmetogoto Miamiwithhimtomorrow." "What?Gordon'snotgoingtobehappy." "Comeongirl.Weneedtogotothesalon.Ineedtheworks.I'lltalktoGordontonight.Thetripis partbusiness." "Yeah,andpartmonkeybusiness." "Lu,I'mtostepthreeofthe'ArtofWar'.I'mwinningthebattlechick." "Damn,thatfar?Thenshit..carryon..asoldier."Shesalutedmeandwehoppedinmycar. WegottheworksandLulacried,beggedandcursedduringthewaxingandIhadtohideher pursebeforeshepulledher'44'Magnum.Afterwardwedidourimitationoftwocowgirlswhohad riddentheirhorsestoohardandprobablyputthemupwetandwaddledintothemallgrimacing.I gotanewdressandshoestomatchforthedistractionandsomesexylingerie.Lulacamehome withmetohelpmepickoutstufftopackandsheofferedtokeepRexforme.Shesaidmycloset wasboringforlackofneonspandex.Itoldhershehadenoughforbothofus. Gordonwasn'thappythatIwasmissinganight,buthedidn'tgivemeahardtimebecauseIhad beendoingsowell."Behaveyourselfonthetrip.Bytheway,whenareyougoingtobring Manosobyhere?" "Hedoesn'tknowaboutthisyet.He'sfiguredoutthatmyeatingisbetterandmybodyhas changedsome."Heraisedaneyebrow. "Youdidn'tsaysexwasout!SpeakingofthatsubjectIhaveaproblem." "What?Idon'tteachsexanythinggirlie.Youneedhelpinthatarea,I'mnotyourman.Besides that,Manosoismyfriendandthatwouldjustbe...haveItoldyougirlsyoucoulddriveabat, batshitcrazy!" "No.Yuck!Theproblemissugar.Ineedalittlemoreinmydiet.Andeww..,youdoknowIcall himBatman?" "Why?Andagain,poorbastard."Iglaredathim. "Shit,thisisembarrassing.Igetreallya..hornywhenI'moffsugar."He'sjuststaringatmewith hisarmscrossed.Iguesshisbullshitsmelleriskindoflikemyspidysenseandhe'schecking forcrap."Gordon,IalmostkilledRangerandyou'reprobablystandingtooclosetomerightnow!" Hesurprisedmeandburstoutlaughing. "Areyouyankin'mychain,missy?"

"Nope.MyhormonesgocrazyandI'mamenacetomenandshowermassagers.EvenRanger wantsmetoaddsugarandhe'satotalhealthnut.I'maskingyourpermission."Hechuckledand shookhishead."Ifyouaren'tsomepieceofworkPlum.Trytosticktogoodnaturalsugarsfirst likefruitsandtrydessertswithgrainslikeoatmealraisincookies.Stayawayfromemptycalories likedoughnuts." "Damn!" "HavefunonyourtripPlumanddon'tbreakManoso."Hewinkedatme. LulaandIdidourrunthenextmorningandsheleftwithRex.IwassoexcitedIwasbouncingoff thewallsbeforeRangercalledrightbeforenoon."Yo." "ReadyBabe?" "Yep." "I'llbethereinaboutfifteentopickyouup." "Okaybye." WhenIheardmylockstumble,Irantothedoorandsnatchedhimthroughitandpinnedhim againstthewallandpulledhisheaddownforahotwetkiss. "Babe."Hewashandsomehotinbluejeansandabuttondowncrewneckshirtwithrunning shoes.Hehadhishairpulledbackintheleathertieandhisshadesonhishead.Hehadhis earringsinandaSwissPatekPhilippewatchonhiswrist.Ifingeredhisexpensivewatch. "Dowehavetime?" Hechuckled."Sorry,wedohavetogettoNewark."Hewhisperedinmyear,"Whydon'tyou changeintoalittleskirtandyoucansitonmylapontheplane."Hewinkedatme. "Wecan'tdothatonaplane." "Wecanonmyplane." "Yourplane.Youownanairplane?"Henodded. "IshouldhaveknownBatman.IguessyouhaveaBatcopterandarealBatmobiletoo."He laughed.Ichangedintoaskirtjustlikehesuggestedandhegrabbedmybagsandwelockedup andheadedtotheairport. LesterandHaldroveusandtookcareofourbags.Whenwewalkedoutsidetothetarmac wheretheprivateplaneswereIstopped,mouthagape.Therewasabigsleekjetairplanewitha bigblackRacrosstheside."Wow." "It'saGulfstreamV.Seats1220passengersandcrew.Seatingisconferencestyle.It'sa comfortableplane."Hewhisperedinmyear,"There'sacomfydivanthatwecanmakeouton." Ohboy! "Let'sgo!"Helaughedandweheadedtothestairs.Atthetoptwomeninuniformmetus. Rangershookhandswiththem."Kevin,Jack,thisismyfriendStephaniePlum." "Babe,KevinStuartisourcaptainandJackBakerisourcopilot." Ishookhandswiththem."Nicetomeetyouguys.Youhavelotsofexperiencedoyou?"They smiledandnodded. Rangersaid,"Theyareexcombatpilots.Theyhaveflownunderextremeconditions.They'rethe bestandyou'reverysafeintheircapablehands." "WellofcoursetheyareexmilitaryheroesBatman.Probablysuperheroestoo,hugh?"Allthe menchuckled. CaptainKevinsaid,"BuckleupMs.Plumanda..Mr.Batmanandwe'llgetthisbirdoffthe

ground."Rangersmirkedathim.Hebuckledmeinandsatdownnexttomeanddidthesame. Hesmiledatmeandtookmyhand. WhenCaptainKevingavetheallcleartomovearoundaftertakeoffweunbuckledandRanger toldmehewasourserverandwantedtoknowifIwantedanything."Coffee,teaorme,Babe?" "Duh?I'lltakethetea."Hesnatchedmeupandtickledmeashewalkedtothedivanandplopped downwithmeinhislap. "So,didyougetthatbikiniwax?"Inodded "Welllet'scheckitout."HeslammedmedownonthedivanwhileIgiggledandstuckhishead undermyskirtandpulleddownmythong.Hisheadcameupandhiseyeswerefullof amusementandhesportedafullgrinwithteeth."Whatdoyoucallthis,Babe?" "It'sapersonalized'Hollywood'wax.Yousaidthatyouwanteditexclusivelydidn'tyou?" "YesIdid.Itlooksthesideofmyairplane."Webothburstoutlaughing. "Doyoulikeit?" "Letmetakeanotherlook."Hestuckhisheadbackundermyskirtanddidn'tcomeupthistime untiltwoorgasmslater. Threehourslater,wewereontheMiamiairporttarmacwavinggoodbyetoKevinandJackand headingtothecarRangemanhadleftforhim,aMercedesCabrioletconvertible.Blackof course."Areyouhungry?" "I'mstarved." "I'lltakeyousomeplacespecial.Tonightwe'llbothgettosplurge.Thefoodwe'regoingtoeat tonightisrichandflavorful.You'llloveit." "Ohgoody." HeputhissunglassesonandwentintohisdrivingzonewhileItookinthescenery.Alittlewhile laterwewerepullingintotheparkinglotofaCubanrestaurant. "Ranger,I'msoexcited.Thisisthefoodyouategrowingup?" "Yes.Thisismysisterandbrotherinlaw'splace.It'soneofthebestinMiami. "Willtheybehere?WillIgettomeetthem?" "Yes,Babe." "WewalkedinthedoorandRangergavehisnametothehostess.Shetookustoareserved tableinthebackoftherestaurantandbeforewesatdownabeautifulwomanwithlongdark brownhairranupandlaunchedherselfintoRanger'sarms.Helaughed. "Holahermana(hellosister).Lucia,thisismyfriendStephaniePlum." Shegrabbedmeandhuggedme."NicetomeetyouStephanie.WelcometoMiami.SitandI'll sendoutabottleofwine." "Thankyou.VerynicetomeetyouLucia." Rangertookaseatwithhisbacktothewallandpulledmedownintheseatnexttohim."Your sisterisniceandsobeautiful.Iseveryoneinyourfamilyattractive?" Hesmiled."Iguessso.I'llhaveLuciashowyouapictureofmyparents.Theywereavery handsomecouplewhentheywereyoung.Theystillareforthatmatter." "Wheredotheylive?" "Newark.Theyspendquiteabitoftimedownheretoo.Mybrother,Marcoistheheadofthis Rangemanoffice.TheystaywithLucia,Marcoandatmyhomeoften." "Icanhardlywaittoseeyourhouse."

"You'llseeitsoon.Whatareyouinthemoodfor?There'sseafood,pork,steak,chicken?" "Uh..dotheymakeadishwithallofthat?" "Nobut,IcanseeifNicolaswillprepareussomethingspecialjustforyou." Ahandsomemaninachef'suniformcametothetable."GoodtoseeyouCarlos.Whoisyour lovelyladyfriend?" "ThisisStephaniePlum." "PleasedtomeetyouEstefania.WhatcanImakeyoutonight?" "Nicetomeetyouandeverythingonthemenuplease."Helaughed. "I'mflattered.MayIbringyouasampleofsomeofourfavorites?" "Yes!Icanhardlywait." "I'llgetrightonitthen."Heturnedandwalkedawayasthewaitresscamewithwineandglasses andicewater.Sheopenedthewineandpouredasmallamountintoaglassandoffereditto Ranger.Hesniffedit,tasteditandnoddedtothewaitress.SheogledhimforaminuteuntilI clearedmythroatandthenshepouredusbothaglass.Isniffeditanddrankthewholeglass downandlickedmylips.Hesproutedanamusedgrinandshookhishead. Rangerleanedintokissme."Babe,whenitcomestoentertainmentyouneverdisappoint." Ittooktwoofthewaitstafftodropthespreadonourtable.Rangergavemearundownofthe dishesbeforeIplowedin.Therewasseafoodandlobsterpaella,crispyporkbelly,chicken empanadas,friedplantains,stuffedavocadosandblackbeansandrice. AfterImoanedandgroanedanddidatotalexampleofafoodorgasm,Isatbackandclosedmy eyesandheldmyhandovermyfullbelly.Rangersaid,"Didyouleavealittlebitofroom.We'll sugaryouupnowandthenI'llfinishthejobwhenwegethome."Hewinkedatme.Ilovedthis cuteandplayfulRanger.Thewaitressbroughtusadessert. "Babe,thisisaNicolas'signaturedessert.Goatcheeseflanwithguavagelle.EvenIcan'tresist it."Hespoonedabiteandfedittome."Omigosh!ThisislikenothingthatIhaveevertasted." Iwhisperedinhisear,"Asidefromyourpenis,it'stheclosestthingtoheaventhatIhaveever experienced." "Babe."Hegrinnedandspoonedmeanotherbiteandkissedme. NicolasandLuciacamebythetabletosaygoodbye.ItoldNicolasthatIhadneverhadsucha fantasticrestaurantexperienceandImeantit.Thefoodwascrazydeliciousandfun.Ranger tookmyhandandwelefttherestauranttogotohishome. TBC Let'shavesomereviewsladies.Ineedthemtokeepmynaughtyfingerstapping! previously Rangertookmyhandandwelefttherestauranttogotohishome. Chapter5 IwasrestingmyeyeswhenRangerrolleduptoagateandhitaremote.Thegateopenedand hepulleduptoalargeMediterraneanstylehousewithaterracottaroofandahugeattached garage.Hepulledintothegarageandparkedandsmiledatme.Wegotourbagsoutofthecar andwalkedinthedoorfromthegarageintoamudroomandlaundryroomwithahalfbathand showerandthenintoalargebeautifulkitchenwithlightwoodcabinets,marblecounters,andan

islandwithbarstoolsononeside.Itwasmodern,yetcozyandwarm.Therewasadiningroom withadoublebaytypewindowinthenextroom.Thediningtablesattenpeople. Thelivingroomhadavaultedceiling,afireplace,andfurnitureinlightcolorslikesage,beige,and coral.Frenchdoorsfromthediningroomandlivingroomledouttoalargelandscapedpatioand swimmingpoolwithhottub.Awindingwoodandwroughtironstaircaseleduptothesecond floor.Thehousehadfivebedroomsandanentertainmentroom,fourfullbaths,andthehalfbath. Thishousewasgorgeous.SurprisinglylightforBatman.Hewalkedintooneofthebedrooms andsetthebagsdown.Itwashugewithakingsizecanopybed,livingareawithTV,andevena smallbreakfasttablewithalargeattachedbathroom. Iwasoverwhelmed. "YouokayBabe?" "Yes.You'reaverysuccessfulbusinessperson.You'reoneofmybestfriends.HowdidInot knowRanger?" "Becauseyoudon'tcareaboutmymoney.Youcareaboutmeasyourfriend." "But,stillI'mreallyproudofyouRanger.Doesanyoneeversaythattoyou?Becauseyou deservetobetoldthat."Ilookedathim."Justlikeyousayittome." Hepulledmeintohisarmsandkissedme."ThankyouBabe.Ihaveanicebigtubinthere.You wanttohaveabathbeforebedandrelax?" "Onlyifyoujoinme." Hebreathedclosetomymouth,"Oh,Iwasalreadyplanningoncrashingyourtubparty.I'lllight somecandles.I'veneverenjoyedmytubbefore." Ohgoody! "Littletotheleft...Mmmn...KayIthinkthat'sthespotOoh...Aah...Uhn..."Iwasalmostthere. "Babe!" "What?"Iraisedmyhalffuzzyheadandwildhairandblinkedathim."Iwashavin'agooddream here" "Nodoubt.IcandealwiththeBatmananalogy,butshitwoman.Hereiswhatcameoutofyour mouthafteryouattackedme:FlashmeGordon,that'sincredibleMr.Hulk,you'renottheLone RangeranymoreandTontoclimbontheback,I'mgoingtoridetheBeastlikeZorro.Doyouhave athingforsuperheroesandcomicbookcharacters?" "Uh...heh...heh...heh.Sorryaboutthat.GuessIsorta'do.DidIactuallysayFlashmeGordon?" Weird,Ibettertuckthatoneawayandforgetit.Hehadanamusedlookonhisfaceandlaughed. "Yousaidallthat.It'sobviousweneedtoaddevenalittlemoresugar.I'mgoingtogoforarun andthenwe'llshowertogetherandgoforbreakfast." "CanIcomewithyou?" "Forarun?" "Yes.Ibroughtmyrunningclothes." Hesmirked,"You'rekiddingme?" "Nooo.Smartass." "Comeonandyoubetterkeepup." Ismirkedbackathim."Noproblem.Iwouldn'twantyoutobetheLoneRanger."Heslappedme ontheasshard."Getdressed." Iwasproudofmyself.IkeptupwithRangerthewholeway.Weranaboutatotaloffivemiles

downthebeach,goingbothdirectionsandcomingback.ItwasabeautifuldayandIlovedthe smelloftheocean.Rangerputhisarmaroundmyneckandkissedmycheek."Proudofyou Babe.Youdidgood.NowIseehowyou'vebeengettingtoned." "Lula'sbeenrunningwithmeinthemorning." "Lula?" "Yeah.BigchangesinLula.She'slostsomepoundsandisstartingtolookreallygood." "That'sgreat.Goodforher.I'mproudofyouboth." WeshoweredtogetherandwhenIopenedRanger'sshowergelcontainer,Isquealed."What's wrongBabe?" "Thisshowergel.Thisisyoursmell!Ialwaysknowwhenyou'renear.FirstIfeelyouandthenI smellyouandthisisthesmell.Ilovethis." "It'sBvlgari.MyhousekeeperboughtitformeandIlikedit.I'mgladyoulikeit."Heliftedmeup andIwrappedmylegsaroundhimashepushedmetothebackoftheshowerandslidintome.I pulledhimtomeandkissedhimhard."Mmm...FuckmeMr.Incredible."Hesmirkedand poundedmeintothewall. RangertookustoarestaurantcalledtheNewsCafinSouthBeach.Hetoldmethatthisis whereGianniVersaceusedtocomeforbreakfasteverymorning.Wewaitedforafewminutes andthenwewereseatedatatableoutside.Rangersaid,"Theyhavecoffeesfromdifferent countries,deliciouspastriesandmuffinsandtheydofantasticeggdisheslikeeggsbenedict, omelets,andquiches." Webothdecidedonomeletsandanassortmentofpastriesandmuffins.Wedidsomepeople watchingasweateanddrankourcoffee.ThiswasapopularMiamiBeacharea.Itwasa deliciousbreakfastandwetookourleftoverpastriesandmuffinswithusandstrolledaroundthe areaholdinghands. SouthBeachisbeautifulwithitspastelcoloredbuildingsandhotels.Ithasshoppingand nightclubs,restaurants,andartgalleries.It'saplaygroundforthewealthyandfamous.Istopped whenIsawacolorfulmaxidressinawindowwithspaghettistrapsandaslituptheside.Theflat beadedsandalstheyhadpairedwithitwerecutetoo."OmigoshRanger,Ilovethisoutfit.Can wegoin?" "OfcourseBabe.Thatdresswouldlookgoodonyou." WewentinandfoundthedressinmysizeandIlookedatthepricetag.Wow!Well,itwasfun windowshopping.Rangerreachedovermeandgrabbedthedress."Whatareyoudoing?" "MytreatBabe.Pickoutshoes,jewelry,andwhateverelseyouwant." "You'renotmysugardaddyyouknow."Hekissedme. "OhyesIamandgetusedtoit.Iwouldlovetospendmymoneyonyou."Ipickedoutsome sandalsandalongstrandofbeadsandearringstomatchandRangerlaidabikinionthecounter attheregister.Ipickeditupandlookedat.Itwasblackwithapatternofgoldonitandthree triangleswithstringsandbeadsattached. "Whatisthis?" "Bikini.It'sforme."Iheldthescrapdownathiscrotch.Iwhispered,"TheBeastisnotfittin'in this.You'llbeindecent." "Babe." HedroveusbacktohishouseandItookmypurchasesupstairswhilehespokeonthephoneto

hisbrotheratRangemanandcheckedinwithhissecondincommand,Tank.Hecameupthe stairsinafewminutes."EverythingalrightRanger?" "YeahBabe.We'llmeetatRangemanacoupleofhourspriortothedistractionandyoucan meettheteamandwe'llgoovertheplans.Nowchangeintothatnewbikiniandwe'llgotothe beach." IgavehimaBurgglare."YoubetterbeinatinyspeedowhenIcomebackout."Ipulledthetag offthescrapandgrouchedallthewayintothebathroomwithit.Goodthingthisbeachispretty muchprivate.WhenIgotmyclothesoffIcursed."Notnowdammit.Crap!" "SomethingwrongBabe?"Iturnedaroundtolookathimashewalkedthroughthedoor."My bodyjustputadamperonourfun." "Whatdoyoumean?Youokay?" "Yep.Ijuststartedmyperiod."Hesmiledandputhisarmsaroundmynakedbodyandrubbed myback."Doesn'tbothermeBabe.Wehavelotstoworkwithhere.Wehavethetubandthe showerandtheoceanandwecanthrowatowelonthebed.Remember,I'vefoughtbloody battlesforseveralyears.Youcan'tmakemeuncomfortable." "But,still..."Hekissedmeagain. "Don'tdoanythingaboutityetputyoursuitonandwe'llgohavesomefuninthewater.You knowwehaven'tdiscussedbirthcontrol.Nowisagoodtime." "I'mgood.Iwasonthepillandjustchangedtoashottypething.MydoctorsaidthatIwould hardlyhaveaperiodwithit.Maybethiswon'tbemuchofone.Iwouldforgettotakethepill sometimesandIcan'tbelievethatI'mdiscussingthiswithyou." "Babe.Weareinasexualrelationship.It'sresponsibletodiscussit.You'reluckyMorellididn't getyoupregnant."Ismirkedathim. "IneverletMorellitouchmewithoutacondom."Heraisedaneyebrowatme. "Ididn'ttrusthimlikeItrustyou." "Nowonderitdidn'tworkout.Thetrustisimportantforanytypeofrelationshiptowork.I'mglad youtrustme.We'rebothcleanandwe'vehadthebirthcontroltalk.Iwanttoremindyouthat therewillbenootheraslongasyouaresleepingwithmeandIwillmakethatsamepromise. Understand?"Ismirkedagain. "What?DoyouthinkI'maslutorsomething?I'llhaveyouknowthatI'veonlybeenwithabout fourguysinmyentirelife.Howmanywomenhaveyoubeenwith?" "No,Idon'tthinkthat.Iwouldn'tbehavingsexwithyouifIthoughtyouwere.Itdoesn'tmatter howmanywomenIfuckedbecauseI'mnotwiththem,I'mwithyou."Hegavemeatenderkiss. Iheldupthescrapsagain."Canyouhelpmegettiedintothis?"Iworkedonthebottomswhilehe tiedthetop.Whenhefinished,helookedatmeandhiseyessmoldered."Youlooksexyinthis Babe." "Gladyoulikeit.IfeellikeI'mstillnaked." "Thatwasthepoint."Hegavemeabigwolfgrin. Hetookmyhandandwegrabbedacoupleofbigbeachtowelsandsomesunscreenontheway downtothebeach.Wetookturnsrubbingeachotherdownandlayinthesunforawhileuntilwe gotenoughsuntowanttocooloffinthewater. WewadedoutandgotgoodandcooledoffuntilRangerputhisarmsaroundmeandstarted givingmehotkisseswithtongueandwanderingupanddownmyneckwiththatsametongue.

Mythoughtswentbacktotheairplanetrip.Thismanhadagreattongue. Hereacheddownandpulledthestringsonmybottomsandpulleddownhisboardshortsand ledmetowardthebeachandpitchedourclothesonthesand.Hesatdowninthewaterthat cameuptoabouthiswaistandpulledmedowntostraddlehim."Thisisnaughtyandkindof kinkydoingthisinpublic." "We'renotinpublic,justoutdoors." "Still,it'skindofexciting.Areyougettingreadytodosomethingdirtytome?" "YesitisandyesIam."Hecommencedkissingmeagainandrubbingmylittleswollennub. WhenIwasgoodandreadytotakehimheliftedmeandpulledmedownontohiserection. "DiosBabe,you'resotightandfitmesoperfect." "Mmmm..."Iclosedmyeyesenjoyingthesensationshewascreatinginsideme."Speaktome inSpanishRanger." "I'myourloverStephanie.IwantyoutocallmeCarloswhenwemakelove.I'mnotasuperhero whenwe'relikethis.I'maman."Hewhisperedinmyear,"Quiseamarteydejarteir.Ahoratemo haberrobadomicorazon,Estefania(Iwantedtoloveyouandletyougo.NowIfearyouhave stolenmyheart)." "That'ssobeautifulcomingoutofyoursexymouthCarlos."Iopenedmyeyes.Hisbackwasto thewaterandhecouldn'tseewhatIwasseeing.Ipointedandtriedtoscreamandnothingcame out."Shhsha...shit!"Ifinallyletoutascreamandjumpedup.Mymindwasworkingfuriously. Gordon,training,surprise,grab,punch,elbow,gouge,knee,kick,bite.Ohfuckno,I'mnotbiting thatthingbutit'sabouttobiteRanger'sass. JustasitgotwithinafootofRanger,Ireachedoverhisshoulderandpuncheditonitshead betweenitseyesanditturned.ThenIlaunchedmyselfatitandgrabbeditsslimyfinandpokedit intheeyeandelbowedit.ItslappedmewithitstailandlaunchedmebackwardandIfloppedinto thewaterwithabigsplashasitswamawayfrommefast.Iturnedaroundbreathinghardand lookedup. TBC Duh...Duh...Duh...Duh...Duh..Duh..Duh..Duh...ThiswasoneofthecraziestscenesIever thoughtoforwroteforsure. Previously JustasitgotwithinafootofRanger,Ireachedoverhisshoulderandpuncheditonitshead betweenitseyesanditturned.ThenIlaunchedmyselfatitandgrabbeditsslimyfinandpokedit intheeyeandelbowedit.ItslappedmewithitstailandlaunchedmebackwardandIfloppedinto thewaterwithabigsplashasitswamawayfrommefast.Iturnedaroundbreathinghardand lookedup. Chapter6 Rangerwasstandingtherenakedmakingafishmouth,butnothingwascomingout.Herubbed hishandsdownhisface.FinallyoutcameashakystringofSpanishIdidn'tunderstand,"Dios Todopoderoso!Porfavormedicenquenoveramimujeralucharuntiburion(GodAlmighty! PleasetellmeIdidn'tjustseemywomanwrestleashark)?"Hewasreachingtotheskywaving hisarmskindoflikehowMorelliusedtodoandthenhelookeddownatme.Whoa!Batmanhas

losthiscool.Ithinkhe'sabouttocrack. "Babe?" Isqueakedout,"Carlos."Hereachedformeandpulledmeupandbegancheckingmeover. "Areyouokay?Areyouhurt?" "IthinkI'mfine."Ilookedatmyfingersandelbow.Theywerealittlerawlikearugburnfromthe shark'sskin.ButIwasgood. Hey,Ijustwhipped'Jaws'.WaittillItellLulaandGordon.IgrinnedatRanger. Hehadhishandsonhishipswitha'WTF'lookonhisface."Whydidyoudothat?Youcould havebeenseriouslyinjured." "WellsorryBatman,butyouweren'texactlyawareofyoursurroundingsandhewasaboutto takeabigbiteoutofyourassandIhappentolikeyourassandIwantthewholeass.Notjust partofit,bothCubanbunsincludingthedimples"Nohedidn'tjustreachoutandsqueezemy lipstogether. "Babe,Idon'tknowthatitwouldhavebittenme.Therehavebeenveryfewsharkattacksin Miamihistory.Itwasprobablyjustchasingaschooloffishandgotsidetrackedbythesmellof yourblood.Itwasmostlikelyjustcurious.Whatyoudidwascrazy." "I'mcrazy?Tellthattoyourassthenexttimeyouwouldhavegonetositdown.Isavedit!"Iput myhandsonmyhips.HeshookhisheadandwentoffintoanotherstringofSpanish.Probably cursewords. "Whatkindofsharkwasit?Didyouseeit?" "MostlyIjustsawyouontopofit,butIthinkitwasanurseshark.Theyswimintheshallowwater here." "Ranger,youdoknowwe'restillnakedright?Don'tgetmewrong,Iliketheview."Heshookhis headandpulledmetowardthebeachwithhim.Hedidn'tbotherdressing.Hejustgrabbedup everything,pullingmewithhimtothehouse.Ithinkhemightbealittlepissed. "I'msorryifIscaredyou.Ihaditundercontrol.Savedyourfinebootybuddy,literally."Igavehis barebuttalittlesqueezeandwinkedathim.Heraisedbotheyebrowsandthennarrowedhis eyesatme.Ouch.HewasalmostHulkgreen.IwasgoingtohavetotamethisBeast,tuckhim in,andputhimbacktosleep. Whenwegotinsidethehouse,Itookthebullbythe...well,notthehorns,andledhimtothe showerandhefuckedmeharderthanheeverhad.Oh...anditwasgood.Whenwecameout, hewascalmerandtheRangerIknewwasincontrolagain.'FortheVictorCapturetheState'. Workedthatflagpoleupandflyin'mycolorsnowforsure. Ishooedhimoutofthebathroomandgotreadyforthedistraction.Idonnedmyultrashortslinky golddresswithalowbackandlittlegoldchainloopsattheshouldersholdingthedresstogether thatdidn'tallowforanythingbutasatinthongandgoldsandals.Iusedextramascaraanda shockingshadeofredlipstickforcourageandglitteredmyshouldersandcleavage.Iused productstosmoothmyhairandleftitdowntohidemymicandearpiece. WhenIwalkedoutofthebathroomandsawRangerIstoppeddead.Gonewerehisdarkclothes. HewaschannelingDonJohnsonfromtheMiamiVicedays,wearinglightcoloredGuccifrom headtotoewithloafersandnosocks.HissilkyhairwasdownandnowIwastheonemakingthe fishface.TherewereplentyofwordsforwhatIwasseeinginmybrain,Ijustcouldn'tarticulate any.Whenhelookedatmetheheatfromhisgazescorchedmeandlitmynetherpartsonfire.

"Youaresohandsomeandlooksodifferent." "YoulookbeautifultooBabe." "Ranger?" "Yes,Babe?" "Thanksforaskingmetocomeherewithyou." "DeNada."Iputmyarmsaroundhisneckandkissedhimandthenwipedthelipstickoffhissoft sexylips."Yourshadewouldbemorelikepinkintheseclothes. "Ilikeeverythingthat'spinkonyouBabe."Wolfgrin.Shit,hescoredahit.Thatonemademe blush. Wedecidedtocombinelunchanddinnerandgoalloutandstoppedandateatarestaurantnot farfromhishouse.Joe'sStoneCrabwassupposedlylegendaryforitsseafoodcuisine.I orderedcoconutshrimp,wedgeoflettucewitheverything,warmwaterlobstertail,andJoe's famouskeylimepie.WhenIfinishedIwasstuffedlikeaChristmasgoose.Ranger'smouthwas twitchingwhenIpushedmydessertplatebackanddeclaredthemealdeliciouswithavery unladylikeburp."Uh...excuseme." RangerheldmyhandasweheadedtotheRangemanoffice.Wewereabletoseethesunsetas hedrove.Itwassobeautiful.Ilookedoverathimandmyheartseized.Ohno.Iwasfallingin lovewithhim.Thisbattlehadchangedandbecomeseriouslydangerous.Hecoulddestroymeif heknewhowIfelt.Helookedatmeandsmiledandmovedhishandtomyknee.Shit!Ihad infiltratedtoodeep. RangemanwasinasevenstorybuildingbetweentheairportanddowntownMiami.Itwassimilar ontheoutsidetotheTrentonoffice,butmorespreadoutbecausetherewasnounderground levelhere.Itwasn'tafancyofficebuilding,buthereRangemanwasprominentlydisplayed outsideandtherewasahelipadontheroof.Rangersaidthattheyadvertisedalittlemorehere becausethepersonalsecuritybusinesswasbiggerhere.Rangerkeyfobbedourwayintothe garageandparked. Hetookmyhandandwegotintheelevatorandrodetothecontrolroom.Ahandsomeolderman waswaitingattheelevatordoorwhenwegotoffwithhandsonhips.HegrabbedRangerintoa bearhug."It'sabouttimeyoushowyoursorryassherelittlebrother.We'vehardlyseenyouina year.ThismustbethelegendaryStephaniePlumandisn'tsheaprettylittlelady?"Yeah,I'mstill feelingprettygoodaboutmyselfandthinkinghecameclosetonothavingawholeasstoshow heretonight. Rangerlookedatmeandsmiled."YoucanguesswhothisisBabe.Meetmyolderbrother Marco." Ishookhandswithhim."VerynicetomeetyouMarco." "Cometotheconferenceroom.Theteamiswaiting.We'llgooverregularRangemanbusiness andthentalkaboutthedistractionandStephaniecanspendsometimewithElisa. Intheconferenceroom,ImettherestoftheMiamicoreteamandsomeothers.Secondin commandwasArmandoandtherewasFredoandJaguar(Jag).ThentherewasCheche, Manny,Tito,Silvio,andElisa.IsatthroughthenormalRangemanbusiness,electronicsecurity, growingpersonalsecurity,surveillance,fugitiveapprehension,newcontracts,andproblems. Thenthemeetingmovedtotheevening'sdistractionandapprehensionjob. Thetargetwasadangerousfugitive.EduardoRavelowaswantedforracketeering,conspiracy

tolaundermonetaryinstruments,andconspiracytopossessheroin,cocaineandmarijuanawith theintenttodistributeandhewasnumber493ontheFBI'smostwantedlist.Rangerhandedme thefileonhimandshit,hewasbiganduglytoo. Marcosaid,"HeandhiscroniesliketohangoutatapopularLatin/AmericanclubinFort LauderdaleonSaturdaynightscalledthe'OpiumClub'.That'swherewe'reheadedtonight.We gotluckyonthisone.TheplaceisinahotelandcasinoandisapopularplaceforAlistersand celebrities.Ravelohasbeendealingdrugsattheclub.Wehaveasecuritycontractwiththem anditwaseasytogetclearedwiththeclubforthisjobbecausetheywanthimandhiscrew stoppedandoutofthere. We'llhaveabartenderinside,twoothersandRangerinside,andonemanatthefrontdoorand oneoutsideinthelobby.Threeteammemberswillbeinthehotelareaoutsidetheclub.The ladieswillbeworkingtogetherandwedonotwantyoutoseparateifatallpossible.Thisguyand hisfriendsaredangerous.Keepinmindthatwecannotmuckthisupwiththecustomer.Our contractwiththemisabigone.Itneedstogodownsmoothlyandquietly." Rangersaid,"Babe,takealookaroundtheroom.Rememberthesefaces.Theyareyourback upandI'llbeclose.Gobythebookanditwillgodownfine."Igavehimanervoussmileand nodded. "Stephanie,wewanttothankyouforcomingtoMiamitoworkwithElisaandhelpwiththis apprehension,"Marcosaid. IlookedatRangerandsmiled."Noproblem.That'swhatRangerandIdo.Wehelpeachother." Marcosaid,"Gogetdressedmenandladiesandwe'llheadoutinaboutanhour.Stephanie,you andElisacanusetheapartmentonseven." Rangerwalkedustotheelevatorandhandedmehiskeys."Fortheelevatorandapartment Babe.Seeyouinalittlebit."Hekissedmyforeheadandhandedmethemicsandearpieces. Whentheelevatorclosed,Elisaerupted."ThatmanisasexGod!Walkingsexonastick!Shit! Areyoutwotogether?Igotta'havedetails."Ilookedatheralittleshockedandthenlaughed.I hadbeenaroundRangerlongenoughtoseethereactionsofwomenaroundhim.Hemostly ignoredit,butshe'sright.HeishotsexGodwalking. Elisawascute.ObviouslyofLatindescent,shehadbigbrowneyesandlongdarkstraighthair andalittleaccent.Shewasshorterthanmeandcurvaceous.Thelittlegirlhadbootythekind menlikedalot.Shelookedtobealittleyoungerthanmeandshehadaprettyfaceandfulllips. Shewasperfectfordistractionsthatwasforsure. "Elisa,you'reright.Thatmanissexwalkingandwearesorta'together.Doyouhavea boyfriend?" "Notrightnow,whichisokay.IwentbacktoschoolandI'mfocusingonmyjob.Rangemanis payingmytuition." "That'sterrific.Whatareyoutaking?" "BusinessAdministration.Theywanttoworkmeintohelpingwithcontractnegotiationand customerliaison.Turnsoutsomecustomersarealittleintimidatedbybigbeefyguyscarrying guns.I'mgoingtobethesoftersideoftheRangemanoffice.Luckyme,huh?" "Iactuallythinkthat'sterrificandareallysmartidea.Whocameupwiththatidea?" "Umm...IthinkitwasRangerandtheTrentonoffice." Hmm...I'msurprisedtheyhaven'tmadethatmoveinthatofficeyet.Iunlockedtheapartmentand

wewalkedin. "Let'sgetyoudressed.Areyourclothesuphere?Doyouneedtoshoweroranything?" "NoshowerandyesIhavemyclotheshere."Shepulledaslinkylittleredminidressoutofabag andsomeplatformpumpstomatch.Shechangedandwentintothebathroomtodoher makeup.Whenshecameout,shelookedlikealittledoll. "Wow,Elisayoulookfantasticinthatlittlereddress.Isurehopetheteamisnotdistracted."She giggled. "ThanksStephanie." "Let'sgetyourmicandeargearonyou.Areyounervous?" "Iamalittlebecausethisisaseriousbadguy,butIknowmybackupisthebestandItrustthese guys." "Thenyou'reaperfectfitforthisofficebecausethatbondandthattrustisthemostimportantin thisbusiness.Youhavetotrustyourpartners.That'swhatmyrelationshipwithRangerisbuilt on." "Youarealuckywoman.Woof,thatRanger." Ilaughedagain,"Youknow,hiscousinwhoisalsoahottieandapartnerwithhim,worksinthe Trentonofficeandistotallysingle." "Really?What'shisname?" "LesterSantos.He'sagreatguy.TotaloppositeofRanger.He'ssillyandsuperfriendly.He'sthe techbossinTrenton.Seekouthisexpertisesometime.Maybeavideoconferenceinalowcut blouse."Iwinkedatherandplacedhermicandhelpedhertogetherearpieceright. "Stephanie,Ithinkwearegoingtobegreatfriends." "Ithinksotoo.Nowlet'stalkaboutthejobtonightandcomeupwithalittleplanandbackupplan justincase." TBC Allyourguessesatwhatthecreaturewaswerecute.Ihadtolookupaccountsofsharkattacks ontheinternetandtheonlyoneswereactuallythiskindofsharkandveryfew.Oneofyou mentionedtheyaren'tslimywhichiscorrect,butintheaccountIreadofarealattackbyanurse sharkthepersonhadmentionedthathefeltsomethingslimytouchhimsoIwentwithit. Chapter7 RangeraskedmeaboutElisaonthewaytoFortLauderdale. "She'sperfectforRangemanMiami.Shetruststhemenandrespectsthem.She'syoung,butI thinkshe'sprobablyaverysmartgirl.Sheunderstandstheimportanceoftheworkandthe danger.It'sreallynicethatyou'repayinghercollegetuition."Hesmiledatmeandsqueezedmy hand. "Ranger?" "YesBabe?" "Thesalesandliaisonjobusingafemaleemployeeforyourcustomersissmart.Whyhaven't youdonethatinTrenton?" "I'vebeenwaitingonyouBabe.Iwouldreallylikeyoutodothatjob." "Youneveraskedorsaidanything."

"Thetimingwasn'trightyet.IfIaskedforyoutocomeworkfulltimeatRangemanandquit Vinnie,wouldyouhavedonethat?" "Probablynot." "IsawMorellipressingyoutodowhathewanted.IknewifIpresentedthattoyouduringthat time,youwouldhavethoughtthatIwasjustexertingmywillonyouthesameway.It'sarealjob andimportanttomycompany.Iknowyourbackgroundandeducation.You'reperfectforthejob. Iwouldloveforyoutoconsiderit." "Wow.SomanyRangerwordsagain.Thatsoturnsmeon."Hegrinnedatmeaswepulledinto thehotelparkinglot.Hetappedhisownmic."Let'sdoasoundcheck."Everyonechecked includingElisa.IgotoutofthecarandElisaandIhookedarmsandheadedin."Okaylet's spreadoutfirstandfindtheskipandthenmeetbytheDJbooth.Gotit?" "Yeah.Meetyouinafew." Thisplacewasoverthetopcommercialandgaudyashellwithchandeliersandgoldstatues. Jeez,perfectplacethoughforadrugdealertosellhiswarestotherichandfamousofthearea withlotstospend.Onthesecondleveltherewasanotherroomandthereinthecornerwasour guy,alongwithhisposse.Ididn'tlikethelooksofthisandmysensesweretellingmethatthis privateareawasgoingtobeaproblem."ElisaandRangermeetmeattheDJbooth." TheywereboththerewhenIwalkedup."Ranger,he'supstairsinaprivateroomandmysenses areinalarmmode.Yourguyscan'tjustwalkinthere.Atleastnotunlessyou'reacustomer.I'm worriednotforme,butforElisa.Thisisherfirsttime." "Stephanie,I'llbeokay.Itrustyou." Damn.There'sthatword.Ican'tresistthewordstrustorplease. "Babe,I'llbeacustomer.Mengetinplace.Oneonmysixandtwooutsidetheroom." "Okay.ElisaandIwillbecustomersfirstandwe'llflirt.Itmightbehardtolurehimout.Wemight havetowaitforanopportunitylikearestroomvisitorsomethingoreventheclubclosing.So, listenforit."Rangersqueezedmyhandandgavemearollofmoney."There'sathousandinthis rollinhundredsandfifties." ElisaandIheadedupstairstotheroom.Wewenttowalkinandabigguystoppedus.Iwentto speakandElisasaid,"Amigo,wewerelookingforahookup.Wastoldwemightfindituphere somewhere."Heputhisarmdownandnoddedtothecornerandourguy.Thisgirlwasgood. WewalkedtothecornertableandwaitedforRavelotolookatus. "What'syourpleasuresenoras?" Elisasaid,"Nieve(snow)." "Cuanto(howmuch)?" Elisashrugged."Mmm...Dogramos(twograms)." "Cientocincuentadolares(onehundredandfiftydollars)." "Porquetanto(whysomuch)?" "Esteeselprecioamenosquequieranegociar(That'sthepriceunlessyouwanttonegotiate)?" Helookedusbothupanddownandlickedhislips.Eww!Notranslationneededthere. Ispokeup."Maybewhenyou'refinishedhere,wecangotoyourplace." "ThenyoushouldshowmewhatyouhavetoofferandmaybeI'llgiveyoualittletasteuntilwe arereadytoleavehere."Okay,whatthehellishetalkingabout?IheardRangerinmy microphone."NoBabe,youdon'twantwhathe'soffering.Refuseit."

"NotthewayIlikeit.Thanks." "Maybeyoushouldtry.Yes?" "Uh...Nothanks."Elisaspokeup."Maybewewilljustbuyonegramandcheckbackwithyou laterbeforeyou'rereadytoleave?" "Onegramandyouwillbothstayandhaveataste."Ohshitthiswasnotgoingwell.Hemotioned forElisatotakeaseatnexttohim.Igrabbedherarm. "We'llcomeback." "Nochica.Youwillstay."Hepulledwhatlookedlikeanoralsyringeoutofabagandmotionedto oneofhisgoonsandnoddedtowardanearbyhallway."Leconecteyluegoharemosalgunas preguntas(Plugherandthenwe'llasksomequestions.)." Thegoongrabbedmyarmandthesyringeandbeganpullingmetothehallway.Elisawas lookingatmewithwideeyedhorror. Whatdidthatguysay?Whatishappeninghere?Thiswholesituationjustwenttoshit!Poor Elisa.Ilookedherintheeyeandmouthed,it'sokay.Gordon,I'mchannelingyou,surprise,grab, kick,punch,bite,poke,elbowIheardRanger."OnourwayBabe." Thegoondraggedmedownthehallway."Bendoverandpullyourdressup." "What?No!Iwillnot!" "Youdoitnoworyou'llbesorrylaperra(bitch)." "Whatthehellareyouplanningtodowiththat?" "It'sgoinginyourtightlittleculo(ass)." "What'saculo?" "Stoptalkingandbendover."IclosedmyeyesandstartedtobendoverandthenItookmyheel andstompedhistoeandsentmyelbowbackwardsatthesametime.HebentoverandIturned andkneedhiminthecojones.Yeah.HowdoyoulikemySpanishyoufucker?Who'sbending overnow?WhenhefellIjumpedonhimhardandstraddledhimandgrabbedhishairand growledandstartedslamminghisheadtothefloor. StronghandsgrabbedmefrombehindandIelbowedhim."Ummph...Babe!Stephaniestop!" ThenIfeltthetingle.ItwasRanger.Iletgoandturned."ComehereBabe."Hewasreachingout tomeandhiseyesweresoft."Elisa?Isshesafe?" "She'sfine.Alreadyheadingdownstairsandoutofthebuilding." Mannywastherehandcuffingthegoon. "Let'sgoBabe.Youdidgood."Westartedwalking. "ThisdistractionwenttoshitfastRanger." "Itwasn'tyourfault.Wehavehim." "Whatwasthatgoongoingtodotome?" "Youdon'twanttoknow.Forgetit." ElisawasoutsideandIrantoher."Areyouokay?" Shehuggedme."Yes.Iwasmoreworriedaboutyou." "I'mgoodandI'lltellyouasecretthathelpedalot."ItoldheraboutGordonandmyclassesand howmuchithadhelpedmetofeelequaltotheguysandthejobthatwe'redoing."Ifyouwantto learnsomeselfdefenseI'llhavehimhookyouupdownhere." "Hellyes,hookmeup!" "Okay.GordonorIwillcallyou.StrikeaposeandletmegetapictureofyouforLesterandwe'll

swapnumberstoo."Shestuckherhipoutandsmiled."Areyousureyou'rereallyokay?" "Yeah,I'mgood.Itrustedyouandtheguysandtheydidn'tletmedown."WehuggedandI headedtotheMercedes. "Takemehomeand" "WaitBabe."Hereachedinmydressandgrabbedthemicandremovedourearpieces. "Nowwhatwereyousaying?"Hegrinnedatme. Iputmyarmsaroundhisneckandwhisperedtohim,"IwanttosoakinthetubandIwantyouto fuckmeuntilIcan'tremembertonightanymore.Canyoudothat?" "YesBabe." IwassoexhaustedfromtheadrenalinerushandcrashIdidn'tmakeitoutofthetubbefore fallingasleep.IwokeuplayinghalfontopofmyhotCubanmaninatangleofarmsandlegs.He wasstillasleep.Helookedsoyoungandsweetinhissleepandtherewasadefinitemovement underthesheets.Iputmyheadunderthesheetandgrabbedhisshaftandtookhiminmymouth andlickedhim. Hegroanedandgrabbedmyhairandranhisfingersthroughmycurls.Iputmymoutharound himandsuckedhimhardandgrabbedhisballsandthebaseofhisshaftandkeptupa relentlesspaceuntilhebeggedme."Ahh...pleaseBabe."Ilickedcirclesaroundhistipandtook himinmymouthasfarasIcouldandhummedalittleandhegasped.Afewmoregoodflicksof mytongueandasuckwhileworkinghisshaftandhecamehardandIswallowedhimdown.I raisedmyheadandlookedathim."GoodmorningBatman." "Babe."Hepulledmeuptohimforakiss. "SorryIpoopedoutonyoulastnight.Figuredyoudeservedthat." "Youdidmakeupforitjustnow.Thatwasanicesurprise." "DoyouwanttogoforarunbeforewehavebreakfastandhavetoleaveBatman?" "Soundsgood." "Babe,weneedtotalk." "Aboutwhat?" "You'reexercising,eatinghealthier,andyou'vewrestledasharkandabadguy." "Maybeweshouldjustchalkituptoareallybadday." "Doesn'tflyBabe." "Youaresonosy.LulaandIhavebeentakingtheseclasses." "Isthatwhereyou'vebeengoingatnight?Whatkindofclasses?" "Selfdefenseclasses.Fightingclasses." "I'mreallycurioustoknowwhatkindoffighting." "DirtyDozen,guynamedJerryGordonteachesit."Heguffawed. "Babe,Ihelpedthatsonofabitchwritethatbook.Howthehelldidyoufindhim?" "What?Thephonebook.Whatdoyoumeanyouhelpedhim?" "Babe,Ihavebeentryingforayeartogetyoutodoexactlywhatyou'redoingnow.We'llpayhim avisitwhenwegetback.Again,youneverdisappoint." Wewentforourrunandshoweredandateourleftoverpastriesanddrankcoffee.Rangersaid thattheplanewasn'tleavinguntillaterintheafternoonandhewantedtotakemetoaplace calledCoconutGroveforshoppingandanicelunch. Rangerhasgoodtasteandhepickedseveralthingshelikedandboughtthemforme.Hesaid

forajobwelldone.Hesurprisedmewhenheaskedmetohelphimpickoutsomethingfora nineyearoldgirl.WegotheracolorfullittleKateSpadedesignerbagandIboughtlotsoflittle stufftofillituplikecolorfullipglossandcostumejewelryandRangerboughtheraniPodanda coupleofiTunescardstogowithit. IboughtLula,Connie,MaryLou,andevenGordonsomesouvenirsandwewenttoaseafood restaurantonthemarinaoverlookingallthemooredboatsandyachts.Theyhadadockwhere boatscouldpullrightuptotherestauranttodine.Itwasagreatareawithabeautifulpanoramic view.Wesatatatableonthebackdeckoverlookingthemarina. RangerrecommendedthatItrysomethingwithconchinitbecauseMiamiandtheBahamas werethebestplacestogetit.SoIorderedtheseafoodplatterwithshrimp,crab,fish,andconch fritterswithcoleslawandwhenheorderedthegrilleddolphin,Ialmostcameoutofmychair. "What?" "Babe,it'snot'Flipper'it'satypeoffish."Irelaxedandhetoldthewaitresstobringusthe chocolatemoussecheesecaketosharefordessert. "Whew,thepicturethatflashedinmyheadwhenyouorderedthat.Areyougoingtosullyyour templeandeatdessertwithmeagain?"Hegrinnedandnodded. Wesharedourdishesandourdessertandheinformedmethatweweremakingaquickstopon thewaybacktohishouse.Aboutfifteenminuteslaterwewerepullingintoadrivewayinanice neighborhood.Hetoldmethathewouldberightbackandgrabbedthegiftswehadpurchased fortheyounggirlandwenttothedoor.Iwatchedasanattractivewomanansweredandthey spokeforacoupleofminutesandthensheshookherheadandtriedtoclosethedoorand Rangerhelditandthenshefinallytookthegiftfromhimandshutthedoorinhisface. WhenhecamebacktothecarhewasquietforafewminutesandfinallyIputmyhandonhis legandasked,"Doyouwanttotalkaboutit?" "Notreally.Butyoudeserveanexplanation.ThewomanwasmyexwifeandthelittlegirlIleftthe giftsforismynineyearolddaughterwhowastheresultofaonenightstandwhenIwasa youngRanger.Idon'thavearelationshipwithher.Idosupporther,butIgaveupcustodywhen Rachelremarried." "Shewon'tletyouseeyourdaughter" "Julienotveryoften." Isqueezedhisleg."I'msorry.That'snotfairtoyouorJulie.IwouldwanttoknowmyrealDad." "Well,Iwasn'tactivelytryingeitherforseveralyears.Iwasbeinganass." "Wow,yourasshasbeenabigtopicofconversationthisweekend.It'slikeamagnetforbad karmadownherelikeI'mamagnetforkooks.Doyouhaveassproblemsthatneedtobe addressed?Maybeyoushouldseeanassspecialist"Thenhegrinnedandtickledmyside hard. WewentbacktohishousetofinishpackingtoleaveandthenheadedtotheMiamiairport.We werebuckledandsecureontheplaneandIlookedoveratRanger. "Ihadareallygoodtime.Thankyouforaskingmetocomeandtakingmetoallthosewonderful places."Helookedoverandwinkedatme. TBC Chapter8

IsighedandlookedatRanger.WewereontheplaneheadedbacktoTrentonandreality.He lookedatme. "DeepthoughtsBabe?YoudidreallygoodworkinMiami.IwouldlikeyoutovisitBostonandgive yourokayforthefemalechosenthereaswell.YouwererightaboutElisa.Shefitswellwiththe teamandshe'satoughlittlespitfirelikeyou."Hegrinnedatme. "Okay.ASpitfire?" "Babe...Thinkaboutyourweekend.WhenwegetbackIwouldliketotalkmoreaboutthatofferto workatRangeman." "IwouldbemorecomfortableifIeasedintoasituationlikethat.Maybeworkingparttimeand thenIcouldstillworkwithLulaanddoskipsforVinnie." "ArequirementforworkingatRangemanistrainingandfitnessandyoubothhavecommittedto that.Maybewecouldtakeyoubothonboardasemployeesandpartnersandworkout somethingwithVinnietotakeallhislowlevelskips.Youbothwouldgetgoodbenefits.Thereare otherareasinthecompanywhereLulawouldfitaswell." "Hmm...I'lltalktoLulaaboutthat." RangercalledTanktocheckinandIheadedtothedivanforanap.Hewokemerightbefore landingtogetmebuckledin.Whenwegottomyapartmentandwegotmybagsupstairs,he askedifhecouldsleepover. "Ofcourseyoucanstay."HebroughtupabagforthenextmorningandweorderedThaifood takeout.WhenitcamewesatonthecoucheatingwhilewatchingTV. "Ranger?" "YesBabe." "IfeeltheneedtotalkaboutourrelationshipbeforeImakeadecisionaboutyourjoboffer." Heraisedaneyebrow."Alright,let'stalk." "Isthisjustasexualrelationship?" "Ithinkit'salittlemorethanthat.Wehavetrustandrespect." "Idon'twantyourmentothinkthatI'mtherebecauseI'mthewomanyou'rehavingsexwith." "Babe,theyalreadyknowIhaveafriendshipwithyou.Theylikeyou." "AmIlikeyourgirlfriendnow?IcareaboutyouRanger." "Babe,Ihavetomakeonethingclear.Ican'tgiveyouacommitment,aring,afamily,ormuchof afuture.Thisrelationshipisjustwhatitis.We'retogetherforrightnow,weenjoyeachother,one dayatatime,nopriceforwhatwegiveeachother." Ifeltmyheartseizealittleasthewordssunkin.Nofuture.Iwaslettingmyselffallinlovewitha manthatwouldneverbemineorpartofmyfuture.'Positionyourarmytodealwithquickand changingpositions'. IthinkIjustlostmyfightandI'mfeelingtheneedtoretreat. ItooktheleadandmadelovetoCarlosthemanthatnightlikeitmightbethelasttime.Ibarelylet himrestuntiltheweehoursofthemorning.WhenIwoke,hewasgone.Iwenttothekitchento makecoffeeandtherewasanoteonthecounterwithalittlebox.Itread: Babe, Thankyoufortheweekendandajobwelldone. HereisyourpayandIboughttheseforyouwhile

wewereinCoconutGrove.Thoughtyoureyes wouldmakethemsparkle. R Therewasacheckfor$10k.Holysmokes!Iopenedtheboxandtherewasamatchingsetof diamondandopalearringsandnecklace.Theearringsweredaintyanddanglyandthenecklace wasthesameonagoldchain.Theywerebeautiful.Ifeltmyheartseizeagain.Iwasgoingto missthis.Notthethings,butthegestures.Hewastheperfectlover,theperfectprovider,andthe perfectromantic.Hejustdidn'twanttobemyboyfriendandhedidn'twantafuturewithmeand hewasgoingtobreakmyheartintotinypieces. Igrabbedmyphoneandspeeddialedone."Yo." "Yoyourself.Thecheckisaridiculousamountandthejewelrywasenough.Theyarebeautiful.I wanttogiveyouthecheckback." "NoBabe.Rangemanmadegoodmoneyonthatjobevenafterpayingtheemployees.You earnedit." Hereisthehardpart."Ranger?" "Yes." "Ican'ttakethejob.Iappreciatetheoffer." "Doesthishavetodowithourtalklastnight?" "Yes.ImadeadecisionandIthinkit'swiseforustogobacktobeingjustfriendsandsometimes workpartners." "Babe,Ithinkwemayneedtotalkaboutthissubjectsomemore.Ididn'texpectthis." "I'msorryRanger.I'mbackinanotherrelationshipwherewebothwanttwodifferentthingsand I'mnotgoingtodragitoutlikeIdidwithJoe.Itjustmakesitmoredifficultintheend." Therewassilenceontheline.Therewasaknockonthedoor. "Ihavetogo.Lula'shere.Bye." IhadtearsinmyeyeswhenIopenedthedoor.Lulalookedatmeandshookherhead."Damn girl!Iknewyouweren'tbattlereadyyet.Thattripwasabadidea.Whathappened?" Asweran,Itoldherthewholestoryandaboutthetalklastnight."Itwasawonderfulweekend thatI'llalwaysremember,butafterwhathesaid,Ipulledmytroopsandran." "Thiswarmaynotbeoveryet.BetBatmanwasn'texpectingyoutocallandbreakupwithhim todayevenifhedon'tthinkhe'syourboyfriend.Youcansay'You'replanningyourmovesina controlledenvironment'.Youbrokeupwithhimtoregroup.Givehimsometimetothinkabout this.Wekeepdoingourtrainingandshitandhey,let'sgetussomesexymatchingbountyhunter uniformstogowithourhotnewphysiques.Wecangooutclubbinganddosinglegirlstuffand youneedarealdateortwotomakethemaninblackjealous.Idon'tthinkhe'sgoingtowantyou tobewithanothermannow." "Hmm...Lula,themilitarymissedoutwhentheydidn'tgetyou.You'reanexcellentstrategist." "DamnSkippyIam.What'sastrategist?" Itookmybigchecktothebankanddepositeditandheadedtothebondsoffice.Wehaddecided totalktoVinnieabouttheuniforms.Weaskedhimifhewouldsharethecostifwehadhis businessnameonthebackofourshirtsandwecametoanagreement.Connieonlyhada coupleofnewskipsandwehadafewdaystoapprehendthem,sowescootedourchairsnext toConniewhileshelookedupuniformplacesontheInternet.

Shefoundusblacktshirtsandjacketsforcoldweatherthatwecouldgetpersonalized.Irefused spandexpantssoweagreedonleggingsandbikeshortsforsummerandleatherpantsfor winter.WeorderedsomecoolConversetacticalboots,twokindsofutilitybelts,andwewenta littlecrazyonthegearandgadgets. WefoundanInternetstorejustforlawenforcementandtheyhadtonsofcoolstuffandgadgets. Lulagotaministungunlipstickandperfumeincheetahpink,lipstickpeppersprayinfireengine red,andpinkhandcuffs.Wegotmics,earpieces,andwalkies,andIinvestedinseveralpairsof thumbcuffsbecausetheywerecheapandjustmean.Igotaministunbatonandapinklipstick peppersprayandacouplepairsofnewcuffs.Conniegotthebugdetectionprotoputanendto Vinnie'sspying. Lulasaid,"Shoppingmakesmehungrygirlfriends,let'sgoeatlunch."Iagreed.Wedecidedon Birdie'sdinerandthe'bigasssalad'witheverythingandthelightranchdressing. "Girls,thefoodinMiamiwasawesome.Icheatedafewtimes.Ihadsomedessertsthatwilllast inmymemoryforever.It'sgoingtobeslowgettingbackintoourhealthyeatinggroove.Youknow though,Ifeelgoodandhavemoreenergynow." "Metoogirl.Betterthanthat,Igotlotsoffineassmencheckingmeoutlately.I'mfeelingreal goodaboutmyself." "Yep."ThenItoldthemaboutwrestlingthesharkandthegooninMiami.Theybothweremaking fishmouthslikeRangerwhenIfinished. "Girlfriend,Gordyisgonna'shitwhenhehearsthat." "Gordy?" "Yeah.Hedon'tlikeitmuch,butitfitshim.Ibeentryin'toworksomeofthatgrouchoutofhim. FridayIlefthimalittlebagfromthedrugstoreonhisdeskwithaboxofsuppositoriesandabox ofcondomstogivehimalittlehint.EvengothimtheMagnumXL'stoboosthisego."Ibustedout laughing.IcouldpictureLulatorturinghimFridayandallweekend.He'llprobablybegladtosee metonight. Whenwewenttoclassthatnight,Gordymetusatthedoor. "Ladies." "HeyGordy,"Igiggled. "FunnyPlumandItoldyoutocanthatshitLula!" Lulaignoredhim,"Gordy,waittillgirlfriendtellsyouwhatshedidthisweekend." Hegrinned."Ialreadyknowwhatshedid." "How?" "Rangerpaidmeavisittoday.HeandIpartneredforthatbookIwrote.Hellofasoldierand leaderandonedangerousadversary.Hewasrealproudofyou." "Hewas?" "Hedidn'tseemrealhappythough.Askedmetolookafteryou.Somethinghappenonthattrip?" "Somethinghappenedwhenwegotback.Idon'tunderstandmen.Whydoyouhavetobeso complicated?" "Menarecomplicated?Areyoushittin'mePlum?" "Hellyes!Howaboutyouwriteanewbook?TheDirtyDozenExcusesWhyMenChickenOutof Relationships!" "Whatdidyoudotohim?"

"Nothing!IjustlethimknowIdidn'tjustwanttobeafriendwithbenefits.Jeez,Ididn'taskhimto marryme.Hehasaproblemwithjustbeingastupidboyfriend." "Whatwashisexcuse?" "Nofuture.Evidentlytheonlyrelationshiphedoesisforsex.Irespectmyselfmorethanthatand Idon'twanttoinvestandgethurtlater.I'mgladIfoundoutnowandItoldhimthatIjustwantedto befriendsagain.Icareaboutourfriendship." "FromwhereIwasstandingtodayPlum,thatdidn'tgooverwell." "Whatdoesthatmean?" "Idon'tthinkthisstoryisover.Ithinkhe'sinarelationshipalreadyanddoesn'trealizeit.Maybe youshouldfightforhim." Lulasaid,"Seegirl.Itoldher.Regroup.Wegoin'backtosteponeofTheArtofWargirlfriend." "What?Don'ttellmeyoutwohavebeenseriouslystudyingthat?"Webothnodded.Heputhis headbackandlaughedoutloud.Heputhisarmsaroundbothofus."Yougalsaresomethin' else." Lulalookedupathissmilingface."WhichonewasitGordy?Thesuppositoryortherubber?" "Lula,you'llceasethatshitrightnoworI'llpartneryouwithStanleytonight." "Ohhellno!Notagain!Fuckerfartseverytimeyoukickhisass.Personneedsagasmaskto sparwithhim.What'sthatword?Healmost'fixated'meFridaynight.Ineversmelledsomany varietiesoffartinmylife.Thatlastoneofthenightsmelledlikesomethin'donecrawledupinhis assanddied.Iwastraumatized.FeltlikeIbeensprayedbyaskunkandneededatomatobathto getthesmelloffme..." Lula'snosewasturnedupandshehadabiggrimaceplasteredonherface.Iwasbentover laughingsohardIcouldn'tgetmybreathandGordonwaslaughingtoo. Wefinishedourclassandweheadedhome.Ishoweredandfellintobed.About3AMIwokeup andIfeltthetinglethatalwaysaccompaniesthemaninblack.Ididn'topenmyeyes.Hewasn't inthebedsoIguessedhewassittinginthechairnexttomydresser.Hestayedfortwohours andthenveryquietlygotupandlefttheapartmentandalittlepieceofmyheartwentwithhim. Aweeklater,Iwokeinthenighttothesametingle."Ranger?" "Youavoidingmeordon'tyouneedmyhelpanymoreBabe?" Whatastrangequestionfromhim. Isighed."I'mjustdoingmyjobmoreefficiently.I'mnotwastingyourtimeormoneyanymore. That'sagoodthing." "Iwanttohearfromyou." "You'llalwaysbemyfriend.Icareaboutyou." "CanIstay?" "Noyouhavetostopbreakingintomyapartmentandcomingherelikethis.Iwanttostart meetingnewpeopleanddatingagain.Iwantmorethanyou'rewillingtogive." "Idon'twantyoudatingothermen." "I'msorry.I'tshumannaturetowantamateandIwantonetoo.I'measy.Idon'thaveanyrules forsaidmate.YouhavetoomanyandI'mnotapossessionthatyoucanuseandthrowaway later.Ifthatmakesyouuncomfortablethenmaybeyoushouldjuststayawayfrommefornow. I'mnotasuperhero,I'mhumanandwegenerallylikehavingfutures." Hesatthereforafewminuteslookingatthefloorandthengrowledashegotupandleftthe

apartment.Icouldn'ttellwhichcharacterwasstrugglingtocomeoutofhim. ThenextmorningmyphonerangbeforeLulaarrivedforourrun."Hello?" "Bomber,thisisTank." "CanIhelpyouTank?" "Yeah.YoucantellmewhatthefuckisgoingonwithRanger." "Tank.Idon'tknowandwhat'swrong?" "Hecameinlastnightandtorehisapartmentalltoshit.ItscaredEllathismorningandhe's missing.Won'tanswerhisphone." "Hewashereinthemiddleofthenight.Hewasn'toutofcontrolthen.Wellhedidgrowlonhis wayout." "Whatdidyousaytohim?" "Tank,thatisnoneofyourbusiness." "Itismyfuckingbusiness!Ihelphimrunamultimilliondollarcompanyandyoubettertalkto me!" "Thisisnotmyfaultdammit!WecamebackfromMiamiandhetoldmethathedidn'twanta futurewithme.ItoldhimthatIdidn'twanttobewithhimbecauseIdowantafuckingfuture.He brokeintomyapartmentlastnightandItoldhimtostopcomingaroundandletmegobecauseI wantedtostartdating.That'smyfuckingperogative.Ididn'tchoosetohavemyheartrippedout andtorntoshredsTank!"Idisconnectedandthrewthephoneacrosstheroom. LulaknockedonthedoorandIletherinandtoldheraboutthecallfromTankandthevisitlast night.Sherubbedherhandstogether."Thisisagooddevelopmentgirl.Theenemyislosinghis focus.Thisisgoodshit." "Let'srunandhavesomebreakfast.I'llmakeomeletswhenwegetbackandwe'llstufftheshit outofthemandeatlotsoffruitandsometoasttooandI'mgoingtoputrealbutteronmine becauseI'mpissed." "Goodplan.Buttertheshitoutofthattoast." Weranandcamebackandateourbreakfast."What'stheplantoday?" "Wegotonemoreskipleftthisweek."Ipulledthefileovertomeandopenedit.Ireaditand laughed. TBC

Previously Weranandcamebackandateourbreakfast."What'stheplantoday?" "Wegotonemoreskipleftthisweek."Ipulledthefileovertomeandopenedit.Ireaditand laughed. Chapter9 "Lu,we'regoingtoapettingzootoday." "Awhat?" "Likeafarmwithlittleanimalsyoucantouch." "Whatkinda'animals?Iain'ttouchin'nodamnvarmints!"

"No.Likelambs,rabbits,goats,ponies.Littleanimalsyoucantouchandfeed.Thisguyworks there.Weshouldwearregularclothesforthisone."IlookedatLula."Doyouhavesomejeans? Weneedtoblend.Nopurplehaireither."Shehuffedatme. WeheadednortheasttowardsLawrenceTownshipandpassedabigfarmer'smarketonthe way."Weshouldstophereandloaduponsomestuff."Theyhadcrabandmeatsandfruitsand veggies.Weboughtabunchofstuff.Wedecidedwewouldgobythelibraryandgetsome cookbooksandhavealittleexperimentaldinnerpartytonight. FinallywearrivedattheHiggenbottomPettingZoo.IparkedmyHondaCRVbyabuildingnear theparkinglotandweheadedintothezoo.Wewalkedthroughthewholezooanddidn'tseeour guyuntiltheveryend.Wespedupandheadedtowardhim.Lulayelledathim,"Hey,youElroy Buckner?Weneedtotalktoyou."Hehoppedoverafenceandduckedintoasmallbarn. Lulasaid,"Dumbfucker.Likewedidn'tseehimgointhatbarn.Let'sgogethisskinnyass." SheawkwardlyclimbedoverthefenceandIfollowedandwegotoutourgirliestungunsand tiptoedintothesmallbarn.Wewalkedovertoapenandlookedinanddidn'tseeanythingand turnedaround.Lulawasstaringeyeballtoeyeballswithabigassostrich.Iwasgettingreadyto saymaybeweshouldbackoutofthebarnwhenthatbirdmadearacketandhauledoffand kickedthecrapoutofLula.Shelandedflatonherass.Ohman,wasshepissed.Shegotupand launchedherselfatthatbirdandfeatherswereflyin'.Thenextthingyouknow,phzzzt'bigbird' wasmotionlessontheground."Shit!" "Lulaisthatbirddead?" "Idon'tknowandIdon'tcare.Thatfuckerwasmean.Hekickedtheshitoutofme.Ithoughtall theseanimalsweresupposedtobeniceandpettable.Ijustgavehimalittleattitudeadjustment. Youcan'tgoaroundkickin'peoplefornoreason." Ilookeddownatthebirdandittwitched."Uhh...Lula,thatthingislikelytowakeupreallypissed off.MaybeweshouldbackoutofherebeforesomebodyseesusandwaitforElroyoutside.He hastocomebackout." "Yeahandmaybe'pissybird'willgetupandpuntElroy'sassrightoutthedoorandintoourhot littlehands." WewaitedfortenorfifteenminutesandthenLulacockedherhead."Don'tthatlooklikeourboy overtherebyyourcargirl?" IturnedandsureenoughtherewasElroystandingtheresmokingacigarette.Welookedateach otherandthebarn."Backdoor,"wesaidalmostatthesametime. Westartedheadingthatwayandwhenhesawusgettingclose,heranintoathatshednearthe lot.Whenwegotclosetotheshed,Elroyranbackoutandrightpastusandkeptgoing.Weonly hadtimetolookateachotherwithraisedeyebrowsandturntogoafterhimwhenthelittleshed explodedandknockedusdownandcovereduswithshit,literally.Wegotupandranawayas theflamesbegantogethigherandspread.ThenwhatwentupnextwasmyHonda.Shit!That wasthelongestIhadeverhadacar.WebackedupandIcalled911andreportedthefire.We stoodthereandwatchedasmycarburnedandthenthegastankexplodedanditwasdead.Lula said,"Damn,ourdinnerjustblewupinthatcar."Iglaredather. MyphonerangandtheBatmanringtonechimed.IhandedthephonetoLula."Justtellhimwe're okayforme.Idon'twanttotalktohimrightnow." "Hello.ThisisLula."

"Yeah,We'reokay." "Shesaidno." "Shitblewup." "Thenthecarblewup." "No,shitblewfirst."Irolledmyeyes.Criminy,Lula! "Wegood." "Okay." "Hello?" "He'ssendingTankandLesterandhehunguponme."Inodded. "Justgreat!Tankchewedmyassthismorning.GuessI'llgetanotherone.I'mreallypissed.Let's findElroy.Iwanttowringhisscrawnyneck.Myguessisthattheshedwasfilledwithanimal manuretheywerecollectingtosellasfertilizerandthatidiotdroppedhiscigaretteinthere." IpulledoutmyTaserandwewereonthehunt.Wefoundhimhidinginaportacrapperonthe propertyandweyelledbackandforthathimfortenminutesuntilfinallywethreatenedtoturnit overunlesshecameout.Whenwestartedrockingit,thedoorflewopenandItasedhim.I cuffedhimwhilecursingafilthybluestreakandwhenweturnedaround,TankandLesterwere standingtherewithhandsonhips.Tank'smouthwastwitchingandLesterwasclearlyamused. IsaidtoTank,"What?Youheretochewmeoutagain?EvidentlyyoufoundBatman." "We'rejustheretoassistyou." "Iappreciatethat,butwe'regood.Ididn'taskforassistanceandtellthemaninblackthatIdon't needhishelp.Nomoretrackersandbuttoutofmybusiness." Lesterasked,"Whatthehellhappenedbetweenyoutwo?Youwentfromgoodfriendstonot talkingatall." "AskhimLester.Ohyeah,incaseIdon'tseeyouforawhile,thisisElisainMiami.Shewantsto meetyou."Iflashedthepictureonmycellathimandhebeamedwhenhesawherassets. Ipointedmyfingerathim."She'snotaonenightstandMr.Gigolo.She'sanicegirlwithagreat personality.Don'tmakemecomelookingtokickyourass.I'mserious.Icankickitandask RangerifyouthinkIcan't."InoticedTankwaseyeballingLulaandshewasbattinghereyelashes backathim.Oh,goodgrief.Irolledmyeyesatallofthem. Tanksaid,"Bomberwe'realreadyhere.Letusgiveyouarideandgetyourskiptothepolice stationandgetyouhome.Justthenweheardaloudnoisebehindus."Whoo..whoo..woooo!" WeturnedaroundandLula'sfoe,theostrichwasatthefenceandhewascraninghisneck towardherandmakingakickingmotionwithhisleg. "Don'tyouthreatenmefucker!Mydinnerjustblewupandyo'asswouldmakeawhoppin'turkey dinner!"TankandLesterraisedaneyebroweach. Ilookedatthem."That'sanotherstory",Isighed. "Okay,let'sgo."LestergrabbedElroyandcuffedhiminthebackoftheExplorer.Italkedtothe policeandfiredepartmentandmadearrangementstohaveyetanothercartowedaway.AllIhad todowascallthejunkyardandsayitwasStephaniePlumandtheguyjustsaid,"Whereisit?" That'ssoembarrassinganditneverismyfault. Tanksaid,"Youtwoareridingallthewayinthebackandwe'rerollingallthewindowsdown."I gavehimmybestBurgglareandflippedhimoff.Lesterlaughed. Whentheguysfinallydroppedmeoffatmyapartment,Igavethemalittlefingerwaveand

headeduptomyapartmentandtheshowerIneededbadly.WhenIgotoutandwalkedintomy roomwiththetowelwrappedaroundmeIstopped.Rangerwastheresittingontheendofmy bedandhedidn'tlookgood. "Ranger,Ihavemademyselfcleartoyou.Whyareyouhere?" "IthoughtIwasgivingyouenough." "Youweregivingmeenough.Enoughtofallinlovewithyouandthenwhentherelationship becameuncomfortableforyou,youwouldhavebrokenmyheartandpushedmeaway.Youtold meveryplainlyhowyoufelt.Idon'tgetafuturewithyouatall.I'mnotgoingtoinvestinyouwhen Iknowyou'regoingtohurtmeonedayanditwillbemuchworsethanwhatIwentthroughwith Joe.Iknowbecauseyou'reeverythingIeverwanted.Ihavetoletyougo.I'mstrongnow,butI mightnotbelater." "I..thethoughtofyouwithanotherman..is..." "I'msorry.Iwantafuturewiththesex.Notjustsexforhoweverlongit'scomfortableforyou.I wantcompanionshipandtheloveofaman." Hewasstruggling."Iwantshityoudon'tknowmuchaboutmeormylife."Iwalkedinfrontof himandstoodbetweenhislegs."Whydon'tyoutellmewhatyoucan?" Hereachedformyhands."Mymissionsaredangerous.Ihaveagovernmentcontractandwhen theycall,Ihavetogo.Thestatisticsarenevergood.IhaveenemiesandIhavetobefocused. Youdon'tknowthethingsI'vehadtodo.Youdon'tknowwhatIam." "Sobasicallyyou'retellingmethatthegovernmentandyourenemiesrunyourlifeandyou're lettingthemtakeyourlifefromyou?Idon'tbuythatandI'mstrongerthanyouthink.Idon'tcare whatyou'vedoneinthedefenseofyourcountry.IknowthatyouareagoodmanRanger.Your entirefocusinlifeiskeepingpeoplesafe.That'swhatyoudoandyoudoitwell."Heremovedthe towelandputhishandtomynowcleanshavenmoundandthenwrappedhisarmsaroundme andkissedmybelly. "Idon'twanttoleaveawomanorafamilybehind.Idon'twanttoleaveyouindanger." "Bullshit!You'rejustnotcomfortablewithcommitment.Igetinplentyoftrouble.DoyouthinkI'm scaredofyourenemies?Soyourworkisdangerousonmissions.Youthinkourworkeveryday isnot?Whataboutmydaytoday?HowaboutMiami?Youhavemorethanplentytoleavea familyinthecaseofyourearlydemise.Ifyouwerekilled,itwouldhurtmeandIwouldgrieve,but yourfamilyandlegacywouldgoon.Copsgetkilled,firemengetkilled,militarymengetkilled, andregularpeoplegetkilledeveryday.Lifehastogoonandpeoplegenerallydon'tjustlivein fearofwhatmighthappen.You'reafraidofrelationships." HewenttoletmegoandIpushedhimbackonthebedandlaynexttohim,drapedmylegover himandheldhim.Ipulledtheleathertieoutofhishairandranmyfingersthroughit."Bullshit. That'sGordy'sfavoriteword.Iheardyouwenttoseehim." Hesnorted,"Gordy?" "Lula'snewnicknameforhim.Hecanbeawfulgrouchy.Lula'sworkingonthat."Heactually laughed. "Babe,themanisaSpecialForcesdrillsargeant.Ofcoursehe'sgrouchy.Hecanbeamean assmotherfucker." "Wellhesurewasthatthefirsttimewemethim.Heyelledatusandcarriedmelikeasackof potatoestohisofficeandgavemethewedgiefromhell.Ohyeah,healsosaidyoumusthave

sufferedbraindamageforwantingtobewithme."Heguffawedatthat. "Ibroughtyouacar.BigDogwonthepoolatthecopshopandCalwonRangeman's."Igrowled athim."What?Yourguysaredoingthatnowtoo?"Herolledtohissideandpulledmetohimfor akiss."HarmlessfunBabe.Theydon'twishharmforyouoryourcars.Losingthemhasjust gottentobeafactofyourlife."Irolledmyeyesathim. "Canwereachsomekindofmiddlegroundhere?WhenIdidthatdumbdeal,IthoughtIwould getupthenextdayandthingswouldgorightbacktothewaytheywere.Ididn'tknowitwould justmakemewantyoumore." "Youknowthereasonyouwantmemore.ThesamereasonIwantyou.Youjustdon'twantto admitit.It'stoolatebuster,I'malreadyhere."Iputmyhandtohisheartandrubbedthere. Hetookmyfaceinhishandsandgavemealongsweetkissandtherewasemotioninthekiss. Thenheletmegoandgotupandwalkedoutofmybedroomandoutthedoor.Jeez,themanis sofrustrating.Iwanttogetthroughtohim,butIdon'tknowifIeverwill.Onesideofhimisstrong andincontrolandtheotherislikealittleboythatwantstobelovedbutdoesn'tthinkhedeserves it.IlovethewholemanandI'mnotafraidofwhatmightormightnothappen.Thereitis.Ialready lovehim.Fudgeandcrappity,crap. TBC Chapter10 AmonthwentbyandtherewasnocontactfromRanger.Nothing.Tankandsomeoftheguys metLulaandIoutataclubonenight.Iwasatthebarorderingadrinkwhenareallyhandsome guywalkedupclosebesidemeandorderedadrinkandslappeddownabillandtoldthe bartenderhewasbuyingminetoo.Iturnedandlookedathim.Hewasolder,maybemidthirties withwavy,unrulysandyblondehair,brightblueeyeswithlonglashes,perfectteeth,asexy mouth,anddimples.Hewasaboutsixfeettallanddropdeadgorgeous.Hotguyinlightbleached lowcutjeansforsure.Hesaid,"Hey."That'sit. "Uhheythanksforthedrink." "You'rewelcome."Nocomeonline,nothing. "I'mStephaniePlum." "GregNeil." "DoyoulivehereinTrenton?" "No,Philly.Justworkinghere."Thiswaslikepeelinganonion.Almostpainful. "Whatisyourwork?" "Iplaykeyboardsandpiano.I'mworkingwithamusicianwho'srecordinganalbum." "WellGreg,that'sinteresting." "What'syouroccupationStephanie?" "Idofugitiveapprehension." Thisgotahugegrinfromhimandfinallyareaction."Asin?" "BountyHunter." "Noshit?Thatisverycool.Afemale'Dog'." Igrimacedattheimage."UmthanksIguess." "You'rewelcomeandyou'remuchprettierthanthe'Dog'."ThenIsmiled.

"Stephanie,mybuddyBrucewouldlovetomeetyou.Wouldyouconsidercomingtoashowas myspecialguest?" "WhoisBruceandwhatshow?" "BruceSpringsteenconcert."Ispewedmydrinkthroughmynoseveryunladylike.Greglaughed andhandedmeanapkin. "YourbuddyisSpringsteen,TheBoss?" "Yeah." "Holycrap!IthinkthisisthestrangestconversationI'veeverhad.CanIbringafriendortwoor three?Actually,ithastobethreeornothingoronewillkillme." Helaughed."Sure.Soticketsandbackstagepassesforfour?" "Uhplease.Whenistheconcert?" "ThisSaturdayinPhilly.Ifyouwant,youandyourfriendscancrashatmyhouseafter.Ihave room.Ipromise,I'magentleman." "IthinkIbelieveyouareaniceguy.IfyougetoutofcontrolIwouldhavetokickyourass,you know."Hebeamed. "Cool.IthinkIwouldliketoseeyouinaction.LetmegetyourphonenumberandaddressandI'll getyourticketsandpassesovernightedtoyou."Wetradedinformationandhekissedmeonthe cheek."PleasuretohavemetyouStephaniePlum." IwentbacktoourtableandsatdownbyLula."Lu?"Shewasjabberingaway."Lula?"Not hearingmeatall."L.U.L.A!" "Whatgirl?" "Youarenotgoingtobelievethis." "What?" "IjustmetaguywhoisthekeyboardplayerforBruceSpringsteenandheissendingmetickets andbackstagepassesforfourforthisSaturdaynightinPhillyandhasofferedhishouseforusto stayover.Me,you,Connie,andMaryLou!"Hereyesgothugeandsheblinkedatmeacouple timesandthenwebothstartedscreamingandwescreamedandscreamed. Tankyelled,"Whatthehellareyoutwoscreamingabout?"Lulawaswavingherarmsaround andtellinghimabouttheguyImetandthatweweregoingtotheconcertinPhillyandstaying overnight.Henarrowedhiseyesonme. "Idon'tlikeitandyouknowwhoisnotgoingtolikeit.Thisguyisastranger.Iwanttoseethis overnightpackagewhenyougetitandI'mdoingabackgroundcheckontheguy.Idon'tthinkit's agoodideaforyoutostaywithhimeither.We'llbookyouahotelsuite.Youcallhimandtellhim thatyouhavesecurityandyouneedtwoticketsandpassesforyourbodyguards." "Tank,Iamnotgoingtodothat.Youguysaresointrusive!"Thenhegotupandwentoverto GregandspoketohimforacoupleofminutesandthenGreglookedatmeandnoddedandthey shookhandsandTankgavehimacard.TheybothwalkedbacktothetabletogetherandTank pulledoutachairforhim.Nohedidn't! Gregsatdownnexttomeandgrinned."Jeez,GregI'msorryandI'membarrassedtoo."Igave TankaperfectBurgglare. "Theseguysareoverprotectivelikebigbrothersandthey'rebusybodies!"Iraisedmyvoiceso Tankcouldhear.Greglaughed. "Areallofthemthissize?"Theguysaroundthetablelaughed.

"Yep.Prettymuch." "Considermewarned."HelookedatTank."Soyourcompanyisasecuritycompany?Whatkind doyoudo?"Tankexplainedtohimalloftheservicestheyoffered. "Tankiscoownerinthecompanyandtheyhaveofficesinacoupleofothercities.They'revery goodatwhattheydo.Alotoftheseguysareexmilitary.Ifyouneedprotection,thesewouldbe theguys."IgaveTankaplayfulpunchinthearm. HesaidtoTank,"YouknowtheBosshasbeentalkingaboutgettingnewsecurity.Hehassome planscomingup.Icouldsendyousomeextraticketsandyoucouldbringlikeateamforanight offunandIcouldhookyouuptomeethim." Tanksaid,"Thatsoundscoolman.Whathotelisclosetoyou?We'llgetroomsandsuitesforall ofusandtheladies." "Dependsonwhatyouwant." "Thebestfortheladies." "BooktheFourSeasonsthen." "Done.Tellmeaboutyourself,brother."IglaredatTankagain,Iknewwhathewasdoing,but everysingleguyscootedcloserandwasinontheconversation.Bythetimewesaidgoodnight andwalkedout,theywereallhighfivinganddoingthoseguyhandshakes.Boy,didIlosecontrol ofthatone. Truetohisword,GregsentmeanovernightpackageandonetoTankaswellacoupledays later.LulahadalreadytoldConnieandIcalledMaryLouwhenIgottheticketsbecauseIknew weneededtohaveticketsandIwouldhavetobepresenttosellherhusbandLennyonthe overnighttrip.Intheendwecameoutvictoriouswhenhefoundoutthatwewouldhaveawhole securitydetail. Tankcalledandclearedthetripandtoldusthathewouldhaveateamofsixgoingandthatwe wouldberidingwiththeminthreeSUVs.SoweweresettoshopFridayanddothebeautyshop thing.Wegotmanipedi'sandhadlegsanddoodahswaxed,andforConnieamoustachewax, andwerereadytorollonSaturday. IcouldhearZZTops''Legs'playinginmyearsaswewereheadedtotheSUVs.Thechickclique wasloadedandcockedandreadytoroll.Weweredressed.Asamatteroffact,Iheardseveral shit,fuck,damn,ohmanandothergroans,whistlesandcomplimentaryexpletivesbeforewe rolledout. TheonlythinghamperingourfunwasthatRangerwasnotthereandImissedhimsomuch. LulaandIwereinthecarwithTankandLester."IsheokayTank?" "No." "Whywon'thecontactmethen?" "Don'tknowBomber." "Ican'twaitforhimforever." "Iknow.I'vetriedtalkingtohimtoo." "He'sagoodman.Hedeserves" "IknowBomber.Man,doIknow." WechangedthesubjectandLestertalkedaboutElisa.Hehadfinallycalledhertotalkafterour conversationandshewascomingforavisitinacoupleofweeksandhewasallexcited.They hadbeentalkingabouteverynightsincethen.

"SoTank,whatwouldacontractwiththeBossdoforyourbusiness?" "Itwouldprobablyresultintoomuchbusinessviawordofmouth.Wedon'thavethemanpower yet.Rangerismakingsomerecruitmentcontactsaswespeak.Weneedmoretrainedguysin alltheofficesrightnow." "Oh." "ThiscontactwasgoodBomber.Ifwegetacontractfromit,you'llbewellcompensated.Letme remindyouthatthisisexactlywhyRangerwantedyoutocometoworkforRangeman.Not becauseofyourrelationship,butbecauseyouwouldbeagreatadditiontothecompanyand teamforyourpeopleskillsandintuition." "ThanksTank." "Ihopeyou'llreconsider.Atleasttheparttimepositionfornow.Thereisapositionforbothyou andLulawhenyou'rereadyandit'sbecauseofbothofyourskillsets.Nothingelse." "I'llkeepthatinmindandthinkaboutit." Lulasaid,"Girlfriend,you'retheGeneral.Wedon'tmoveuntilthetroopsareready.Whenyougo thenIgo.I'mbehindyounomatterwhat."Tanklookedinhisrearviewmirrorandraisedadark eyebrowatus.InoddedatLula.Shewasaloyalfriend. WewenttotheFourSeasonsfirstandcheckedinandfreshenedup.Theyhadbookedusa twobedroomsuiteanditwasbeautiful.Thegirlswerehoppingupanddownandsquealing.Mary LoucalledLennytolethimknowwewerethereandIwasprettysurethatshewastalkingso fastheonlyheardabouthalfofit.Justthebathroomwasasbigashalfofmyapartment.I thoughtofRangeragainandmyheartdidthatfamiliarlittletwitch.Hewasresponsibleforthis,I knew.Rangertheromantic. Wegotourticketsoutandputourlanyardsaroundourneckswithourbackstagepassesand headeddowntothelobbytomeetTankandtheguys.GreghaddirectedTanktobringthegroup tothebackofthestadiumwheretheroadiesandsecurityguysusuallycamein.Wewenttothe designateddoorandwerescannedandtheguysshowedtheircredentialsandlicensestocarry concealedandthenwewerebeingledtoadoorwhereasecurityguardknockedandoutwalked GregdressedinleatherandbootsandashirtopenedtothewaistandIgulped.MaryLouand ConnieweremakingthatfishfacethathadbecomepopularlatelywithabouteveryoneI associatewith. Hegrinnedatmeandputhisarmaroundme."Thisway,we'lljustsayaquickhelloandthen we'llmeetupagainaftertheconcert."Heknockedandwalkedintoabigdressingroomanda chairturnedaroundandwealljustgawked.Gregsaid,"Meetthefemalebountyhunter, StephaniePlum.TheseareherfriendsandtheguysareherfriendsfromtheRangemansecurity companyinTrenton." Brucegotupandshookhandswitheveryoneofus."Wedidsomeresearch.Ms.Plumyouare quitethecelebrity.Greatstuff.Rangemanhasadamngoodreputationinthesecurityindustry. Damnimpressivelookingguysyouare,scaretheshitoutoftheaverageperson.Gregsaysyou guysareallalright,cool." Iraisedmyhand."Uh...Mr.Boss...allthatstuffinthepaperswasn'tmyfault." Helaughed."Aren'tyoujustsomethingdoll?Tough,beautifulandwitty.Iwantyoualltohavefun andenjoytheshowandwe'llgettogetherafterandtalksomeshitandtellsomelies.Whatdo yousay?"

Tanksaid,"WecoolBoss.Gotyourback."Brucelaughedandlookedatalltheguys."Nodoubt brother,nodoubt." Theconcertwasastheysay'offthehook'good.Allofusenjoyeditanditwasatotallygreat experienceseeingitsocloseup.Wefollowedtheentouragebackdowntothedressingrooms afterwardswheretheyhadalittlepartygoingon.Theyhadabarsetupwithbeerandwineand softdrinksandsnacks. Brucewantedtoknowallaboutthebountyhuntingandtheguys'SpecialForcesandRanger backgrounds.Heseemedtobereallyimpressedandalittleinaweofthem.Hetoldthemhow muchheappreciatedtheirserviceasanAmerican.Thenwhentheconversationcametomehe calledmeoverandputanarmaroundme. "Howdidaprettylittlethinglikeyouendupabountyhunter?" "Basically,IneededajobandmycousinVinniehadabailbondsofficeandIblackmailedhiminto givingmeajob."Heguffawed. "Howdidyoublackmailhim?" "Well,hehasapeculiarthingforbarnyardanimalsandIthreatenedtotellhiswife."HeandGreg bothbentoverlaughing. "Didyoujuststartouthuntingcriminalsonyourown?" "Yesandno.Tank'sfriendandtheownerofRangemanbecamemyfriendandmentorand showedmetheropesandbackedmeupalot.That'showIknowthem.MyfriendConniehere worksformycousinandhookedmeupwithRanger."IpulledConnieoverandshewasgushing. Tankinterjected,"Littlesisterhasaperfectapprehensionrecord.Rangemandoesn'thavethatin fugitiveapprehension.We'reproudofherandmygirlLulahere.Theyworktogether."ThenLula gushedandkissedTankonthecheek. "I'mimpressedwithallofyou.Youtellyourbossthatweneedtotalk."ThenhegaveTankhis personalnumber."YoucancallmeonWednesday.I'llbehomeandthat'saquietdayforme." "Yessir.MyselforRangerManosowillbecallingyou." "Ms.Plum,itwasapleasureandIhopetoseeyouagain." "Thankyousomuchfortheticketsandpasses.Wereallyenjoyedit.Youwerereallyfantastic." "You'rewelcome.ItwasaninterestingvisitandIlikeinterestingpeople."Thentheystarted gatheringtheirstuffandgettingreadytoheadout. Gregcameovertomegrinning."Helikesyou."Thenhebentoverandwhisperedinmyear,"And sodoI.Iwanttoseeyouagain." "Uhokay...youcancallme."Thenheleanedinandgavemeasexyslowkiss.Iopenedmyeyes andsixpairsofbigmaleeyeswereglaringatme.Ohshit.Rangerminions.Greglookedover andsawwhatIwasseeingandraisedaneyebrow."SomethingIneedtoknowsweetheart?" "Uh...we'lltalkaboutitlaterifthat'sokay."Ikissedhimonthecheekandweallsaidgoodbye. TBC Previously Gregcameovertomegrinning."Helikesyou."Thenhebentoverandwhisperedinmyear, "AndsodoI.Iwanttoseeyouagain." "Uhokay...youcancallme."Thenheleanedinandgavemeasexyslowkiss.Iopenedmy eyesandsixpairsofbigmaleeyeswereglaringatme.Ohshit.Rangerminions.Greglooked overandsawwhatIwasseeingandraisedaneyebrow."SomethingIneedtoknowsweetheart?"

"Uh...we'lltalkaboutitlaterifthat'sokay."Ikissedhimonthecheekandweallsaidgoodbye. Chapter11 OnthewaybacktothehotelTankfinallyopenedhismouth."Soyouplannin'ondatingthisguy?" "Guessso." "Ithinkyou'remakingamistake." "It'sbeenoveramonthandI'mgoingonwithmylife." "Giveitalittlemoretime." "I'vesaidallIknowtosaytotheman.Ididn'tgetthrough." "Littlegirl,I'mgonna'putitrightoutthereandaskyouaquestion." Igroaned,"Tankplease." "Tellmeyoudon'tlovetheman." "Whatdifferencedoesitmake?I'mfinishedwiththisconversation." "I'msayin'onemorething.Don'tmakeamistakeyoumightregret.Youhadan...intimate relationshipwhenthiswentdown.Don'tjumpintoanythingwithanewguy." "Dammit,Tank.You'retalkingtomeaboutmyownsexlife?"Ifeltrhinobitchcomingon.This wasembarrassingandintrusive."That'sthereasonRangerandIarenolongerspeaking!We fuckedandfuckeditallupanddon'ttellmewhoIcanandcan'tfuck!BecauseI'llfuckanybodyI wanttofuck.I'llfuckLesterifIwant!I'llprobablyfuckGregandthatnewguyyouhired,Vince. Totallyfuckable.Hell,Lula,doyoumindifIfuckTank?Tankyouwanna'fuck?"Lulalooked shockedandthenbustedoutlaughingandLesterwascacklinghewaslaughingsohard. Tanksnorted,"Areyoudone?Ain'tnodamnwonderyoutwocan'tcommunicate.Hedon'ttalkat allandyoutalktoodamnmuchanddon'tmakenosensewhenyoudosometimes." Imadearudefartnoisewithmymouthandsaid,"Shutit!" "Nice.Howoldareyou?"Iflippedhimoffintherearviewmirror.Heshookhisheadandlookedat Lester."YouwanttofucktonightBeautiful?Idon'thaveanyplanswhenwegetback."Tank reachedoverandsmackedhiminthehead. JusttoaggravateTank,Isaid,"Yessweetcheeks,cometothinkofit,Iamprettyhorny.I'llmeet youatyourroomandwe'llhangthe'donotdisturb'signandfucklikebunniesallnight."Lulawas clappingshewasenjoyingthistoomuch. "YeahandI'llcallRangerandhe'llbehereinaboutanhourtobreakSantos'dickandthenhis foolneck." "Uh...onsecondthoughtBeautiful,Idon'tthinkElisawouldbetoohappy."Lesterturnedaround andIgrinnedathim.WelovedpushingTank'sbuttons. Tankwasgrumbling,"YoutwoandRangerfuckin'givemeindigestion.Gotta'putupwith stubbornassjuvenilefriends,runadamncompany"Lulapattedhisback,"Mamatakecareof youbabywhenwegetbacktothehotel.IbroughtmygoodiesfromthePTstore.I'llspankitand makeitfeelallbetter." "Yuck...TMIT.M.I.!"Lesterwaschucklingagain. "Cripes,Iwonderwhatthetopicofconversationisintheothercars." Turnsouttheconversationswerejustasbad.HalcameinredasapickledbeetandRamwas shakinghishead.TurnsoutMaryLouandConnieinstigatedadirtygameof'truthordare'onthe

wayback.IhadnodoubtitwasbadbecauseMaryLouwasaboredBurghousewifeandConnie hadnofilterwhenitcametoputtingitoutthere.ShewasjustpureJersey.PoorHal. Everybodygotcomfortableandweloungedinthebiggestsuiteanddrankbeerandactedgoofy untiltheweehoursofthemorning.ItwasnicetogettoknowRamandCalandWoodybetter. AfterCalgotafewbeersinhim,hesharedthestoryoftheflamingskulltattoo.Plasteredin Tijuana.NotetoselfstayawayfromTijuana.Thatlookwouldn'tbegoodonme. WegotbacktoTrentonthenextdaybeforenoon.AboutanhourafterIgothomeGregcalled. "Lo?" "Heysweetheart.Howwasyournight?" "ItwasgoodeventhoughIhadtodothehangovercurethismorning." "What'syourcure?" "LargeMickeyD'sfryandCoke." "Really?Thatworks?" "Worksforme." "Wouldyouliketododinnertonight?" "Sure.Igotnoplans.Whatdoyoulike?" "Ilikesteaks,Italian,Mexican,Chinese,Japanese" "OhJapanese...Ihadhibachiawhilebackanditwasfun." "Youeverhadsushi?" "No." "It'sverysexy." Uhoh...retreat."Ilikehibachi." "Trustme." Crud."UhokayIguess." "Pickyouupat6pm.Theapartmentaddressyougaveme?" "Umm...yes." "Okayseeyoulaterthen.Byesweetheart." Iwasnervouswhenthedoorbellrang.GregwasmyfirstrealdatesinceRangerandIhad kinda'brokenup.Hearrivedontimeandhewasgrinningandholdingabouquetofflowers whenIopenedthedoor. "Bringingoutthebigguns,huh?" "Haveyouseenyourfriendssweetheart?" Ilaughed."Thankyou.They'rebeautiful.Comein."Igrabbedavaseoutofacabinetandfilledit withwaterandputthemin."I'mready." Wegotinhiscar,naturallyaPorscheCayman.Hedroveustoarestaurantrightoutsideoftown andtippedthewaitresswelltoseatusatatableclosetoafountainandthesushichef.He orderedavarietyofsushiandsakeanddeclaredthefunwasabouttobegin.Hemademeclose myeyes.Hefedmeabitewithchopsticks. "Yum,whatisthis?" "Babytunasashimi.Readyforanother?" "Please."Hefedmeanotherbite.Yum. "OohThis?" "Mangowrappedwithsmokedsalmon."

"Sogood.More!"Hechuckled. "Open.Thisisshrimpnigiri." "Mmm...More!" "Lobsterrollsandascalloproll." "Ihopeyou'rejustgettingwarmedup." "Open.Caviartoppedlobster." "That'ssogood.Sweetandsalty.Gotsomethingelsethere?" "Yes."HeputhislipstomineandkissedthelittlebitsofseafoodImissedandthenkissedme deeper. "Thattastedgoodtoo.CanIopenmyeyesnow?" "Yes.Howaboutweshareoneofmyfavoritehotdisheshereandthenmakeoutliketeenagers atyourplace?"Igiggled."Okay." HeorderedgrilledChileanseabasswithcreamypepperedsauceandbutteredasparagustips andwefinishedoffwithsesameicecream."I'mpleasantlystuffedGreg.Thiswassurprisingly oneofthebestmealsI'veeverhad.Thankyou." Whenwegotbacktomyapartment,Igotusbothabeerandwesettledinonthecouch.Greg said,"Ms.Plum,youarethemostinterestingwomanthatIhavemetinaverylongtime.Iwantto makehotsweatylovetoyou,butI'llsettleforfirstormaybesecondbaseifI'mlucky.Whatdo yousay?" "Well,Icandothemakingoutrightnow.Moreistoosoonforme.I'mcomingoffatotal relationshipmisfire." "Thatremindsme.Tellmeaboutthelookfromyourbodyguards." "Yeahthat.Connectedtothemisfire." "Whichguy?" "Youhaven'tmethim.It'sRanger,theownerofthecompany." "Whathappened?" "WellConniethatyoumethookedmeupwithhimwhenIfirstwenttoworkformycousin Vinnieatthebondsoffice.Shethoughthemightbeabletohelpmegetstarted.Hehashelped meeversinceandwebecamereallygoodfriendsandthenwehadsexonenightandeverything changed.Thingsjustdidn'tgoverywellafter.Theguysareloyaltohimandtheytendtobutttheir nosesinmypersonalbusinesstoomuch." "Thatexplainsquiteabit.Although,Ithinktheycareaboutyoutoo.Ilikethoseguysandsodoes Bruce.Admirablemen." "TheyareandIreallycareaboutallofthem.Theyareexmilitary,exgangbangers,andexcons, andRangerdemandsrespectinawaythatmakesitwork.Justthemixandtheoccupationsay alotabouttheman.Helikestogivesecondchancesandhelikestokeeppeoplesafe.He'sjust complicatedwherehispersonallifeisconcerned.Hesaidhecan'tgivemeafuture.Beinga superherohasitspriceIguess.IcallhimBatman."Helaughed. "IhopeBrucehirestheguys.Theywon'tlethimdown.Theyareliterallythebestofthebest. Theywoulddieforthelifethey'reprotecting.Theyrescuemyassonaregularbasis." Hepattedhislap."Comeheresweetheart."Ireluctantlygotupandsatdowninhislap.Heput hisarmsaroundmeandpulledmetohimandjustheldmeandhummedatunetome.Thatwas it.HejustgavemecomfortandIappreciatedit.ItwaswhatIneededandIsnuggledintohimand

putmyarmsaroundhim. Aboutanhourlater,heleanedintomeandkissedmegentlesweetkissesandthenhe whisperedinmyear,"IstillwanttodateyouandIdon'tmindgivingyoutime." "ThankyouGreg."Hesatmedownonthecouchandgotup. "I'llcallyoutomorrow.Sleepwell." "Thankyou.Youdothesame."Gregwassuredifferentwheremenwereconcerned.Sofarhe wasamanoffewwordsandhisactionsweregreater.WhereRangerwassocomplicated,he wasjustsosimpleandsweetinagoodcalmingway.Ifoundmyselfreallywantingtofindout moreabouthim.Hewasareallydecentguy. BecauseofourclasseswithGordy,GregandIjustgottogetheronenightafterclassatmyplace duringtheweek.Wejustloungedonmycouchandlistenedtomusicandtalked.Hewasfour yearsolderthanme.Hetoldmeabouthisfamilyandhisbackground.Hecamefromasmall lovingfamilybuttheyweren'twealthypeopleandhelearnedpianoatachildhoodschoolfriend's house.Hehadexpressedinterestinlearningandthefriend'smotherhadtaughthimhowtoplay. Hehungoutatmusicshopsandplayedandwhenhewasayoungteenagerheworkedoddjobs untilhecouldaffordtobuyausedkeyboardandthenhefoundabandtojoinandeventually endedupwithagoodreputationandbecameastudioplayerandeventuallybeganplayingon tourwithwellknownbandsandartists. Iadmiredhimforchoosingsomethinghelovedandthendoingwhateverhecouldtolivehis dream.Hehadonesisterwhowasmarriedwithkidsandtwoexestomyoneandnokids.Again, aprettysimpleguyexceptheplayedkeyboardsfortheBossofNewJerseyhimself.Wekissed andcuddledforalittlewhilebeforemakingplansfortheweekendandsayinggoodnight. RangemanhadsecuredacontractwithBruceforsecurityandhadpickedupacoupleofother clientsperhisrecommendation.TheywerehiringandaddingtotheTrenton,Boston,andMiami teamsasfastastheycouldtokeepupwithdemand.GregandIdatedfortwomonthsandhe askedmetohishomeoneweekend.IhadwaitedforRangertomakeamovethatnever happened.Finally,IdecideditwastimetogiveGregthechancehedeservedbecausehewasa goodmanandIcaredabouthimandIwashornyashellinabadway. Wemadelovethatweekendforthefirsttimeanditwasworththewait.Hewasaplayfuland thoughtfulloverandverywellendowedandtheintimacymarkedachangeinourrelationship. HowdidIgofromDickietosomuchmore,literally?NowIknowIgotluckywhenhedid Barnhardtonmydiningroomtable.Thatwasprobablythebestthingthateverhappenedtome. WedatedforjusttwomoremonthswhenIwokeuponemorninginGreg'sarmswithahuge diamondonmyringfinger."IknowI'msupposedtogetdownononeknee,butyoubroughtmeto bothkneeslastnightandthey'restillalittleshakysoIfiguredyouwouldn'tmind.Iloveyou StephaniePlum.Pleasemakemeahappymanandbemyfuture,whateveryoudream."I smiledathim.Hegotit. TherewasnothingnottoloveaboutGreg.Hewasgorgeous,sweet,gentle,loving,and supportive.Hewassimpleinhislifeexpectationsandneveraskedmetochangeormademe uncomfortable.Ididlovehimandhewouldprobablymakemeveryhappy.So,Imadeadecision andsaidyestohisproposal.Iwasgettingmarried. Weplannedasmallintimateweddingsincewehadbothdonethebigweddingbefore.Just friendsandfamily.IhadnotheardorseenanythingfromRangerinmonths.Iwasfinallytoldthat

hehadbeen"inthewind"onamission.Sincethatnightafewmonthsago,Tankhadnotspoken awordaboutRangerormyrelationshipwithhimagain.IguessRangermadeitcleartohimtoo thathedidn'twantme.LulaandTankcontinuedtodateandtheymadeacutecoupleand seemedtobehappy. ElisahadcometoTrentonandsheandLesterwerenowserious.Hewasthinkingaboutmoving backdowntoMiami.Thingsweredefinitelychanging.Ihadn'tblownupacarinmonthsand VinniewasgivingLulaandIsomeofRangeman'smidlevelskipsnowandweweremaking prettygoodmoney,finally.Ididn'thavetoworryaboutfeedingRexormyselfanymoreorpaying myrent. TBC Chapter12 LulaandIhadlearnedaboutallwecouldfromGordyaboutdirtyfightingandhebeganteaching ussomemartialarts.Welikedtogotoclassaboutthreetimesaweektoworkoutand aggravatehim.Wethinkhewouldmissusifwestoppedgoing.Grouchywouldneveradmitit though.Lulawasstilltryingtogetthepoorguylaid. GregandBrucehadfinishedstudiosessionsforanalbumandnowhewasdoingsessionsfor anotherartistandtryingtofinishbeforeashortU.S.andEuropeantourthatBrucewasplanning tofollowupthenewalbum.Ourweddingwasgoingtofitrightinbetweenandsomeofour honeymoonwasgoingtobelaterinEurope.Eventhoughwedidn'tgettoseeeachotherevery day,Greg'svoicewasthefirstIheardeverymorningandthelastthatIheardbeforeIwentto sleepatnight. Wehadatleasttwodateseveryweek.Onenightwedressedupandwentoutsomeplace differentweeklywithGregalwaysbearingflowersandagiftandtheothernightwasourstayin andcuddlenight.MylifehadbecomesocalmandnormalthatduringmytimealonewhenIhad timetothinkIbegantowonderifmypreviousconstantdramajustwasn'tamanifested expectationoftheBurg,myfamily'sdisappointmentinmeandthewrongchoicesIconstantly madeinmylife.IwasbynomeansaFreud,morelikeaWatsonandIthinkIdefinitelyhad somethingthere. Aweekbeforethewedding,GreggotacalltodoastudiosessionwithanartistinLosAngeles scheduledthedaybeforethewedding.TheartistpromisedhimaridebacktoTrentonona privatejettogethimtohisnuptialsontime.Gregreluctantlyagreedtotakethejob. WemadelovebeforehelefttoflytoL.A."TwomoredaysStephandyou'remywomanand we'reoffforalongvacationandwe'regoingtofindussomecozydiggswhenwegetback. Anythingyouwantsweetheart.Iwanttospoilyou."Hekissedmebreathless. "I'maluckyguyandIloveyou." "I'maluckyladyGreg.Loveyoutoo.SeeyouSaturdayafternoonanddon'tbelatebuster."He huggedmeandgotoutofthecarandIwatchedhimwalktothedoorsoftheNewarkairportand heturnedandsmiledandblewmeakiss. Havingmoremeansthannormal,IhadchosenasimplestraplessAlineVeraWangsilkgownin offwhitewithatinytrain.IthadalaceandbeadedbeltandIchoseaveiltomatchthelaceofthe beltandlengthofthetrain.Itwassimpleandbeautiful.IletLula,Connie,MaryLou,andGreg's

sisterpickthestyleofdresstheywantedtowearinshadesofcoral.IjuststoodfirmwithLula thatshecouldn'tpickneonorspandex. GregandhisguysincludingTankhadpickedsimpleblackandwhiteRalphLaurentuxedos. GregandTankhadbecomestrangefriendsandwespenttimewithTankandLulaonceevery coupleweeks.GreglovedLula.Nobodycouldmakehimlaughlikeher.WehadfoundaCatholic ChurchwithasmallbutbeautifulchapeltomakeourparentshappyandIwascurrentlywaiting onmymantoshowbeforemymotherdeclaredtheweddingruinedlikeacoldroastbeefdinner. ItwasalmostonehourpastthetimefortheweddingtobeginandIwaslookingatmyphone whentherewasaknockonthechamberdoor.LulaopenedthedoortoTank.Hisnormaldark chocolateskinwasabouttwoshadeslighterthantheusual. "Tank?"Islowlystoodup. "Bomber,I...have...somenewsaboutGreg."IclutchedmychestastheairleftmeandIcouldn't speak."Littlegirl,hisplane...wentdowntwohoursago.Rescueworkersjustconfirmed"he justshookhisheadasonelonetearrolleddownhisface.Thewholeroomgaspedandeveryone lookedatmewithhorrifiedfacesandmyworldbegantospinandturndarkandthenthankfully,I didn'tfeelorhearanythinganymore. Iwokecurledupinastrangebedandheardvoicesoutsidetheroom.Igotupandwalkedout andlookedatthem.IwasevidentlyinRanger'sapartment.He,Tank,Lester,andhismedic Bobbyweresittinginhislivingroom.TheyturnedandwejuststaredateachotherasIwalkedin theroom.Istillhadtheveilonanditwasirritatingme.Ireachedupandpulleditoffanddropped it.ThenIkickedoffmyshoesandreachedundermydressandpulledofftheweddinggarterand droppeditandthenrippedthestockingsandthrewthem."Better."Iheadedtothedoorandout. Ihittheelevatorbuttonandwaited."Babe?"Iheldupmyhandforhimtostop.Whenthedoor openedIwalkedinandturnedaroundandlookedathim."Lookslikewe'redestinedforthesame endanyway.Nofuture."ThedoorsclosedandIrodetothegarage.CalwastherewhenIwalked outoftheelevator."Canyougiveagirlaliftbuddy?"Helookedatmewithsoftsadeyesand noddedandwalkedtohisSUVandopenedthedoor.Ihoppedinandwerodetomyapartmentin silence.Hewentupandcheckedmyapartmentastheyarealltrainedtodoandcameback. "Callmekid,ifyouneedanything."Inoddedathim.Ipulledalltheshadesdownandwenttomy bedandcrawledinandcurledup. Onthethirdmorning,IwasstillcurledupinmydresswhenthelockstumbledandIheard footsteps."GoodGodPlum!Wehaveourworkcutoutforushere.What'sthatsmell?Somethin' dieinhere?What?Nosmartmouth?Getyourassupoutofthatbed.Mystudentsdon'tquit!"I rolledoverandpulledmypillowovermyhead.Thenhesurprisedme.Hepickedmeupbythe assagainandcarriedmetothebathroomanddroppedmeintheshowerandturnedthecold wateron.Iscreamedandsputteredandcursedathim."DamnYouGordon!" "Finally!Wegotsomethin'.DamncolorfullanguagePlum.YoucouldbeaMarine.Shower yourself.Yousmell."Thenheleftme.Iturnedthewateronwarmandpeeledoffthesopping weddingdressandputmyheadunderthespray.Itactuallyfeltgood.Iwashedeverythingand wrappedatowelaroundme.WhenIwalkedintomybedroom,IsawGordonhadlaidoutablack suitandblouseandshoes.Helookedatmeandhandedmeacupofcoffeeandsaidinasoft voice,"ClosurePlum,everybodyneedsit." "Willyoucomewithme?"

"Manosoisgoingwithyou." "But"Heheldupahand. "He'stheoneyouneedrightnow.Trusthimandgivehimachance.SometimesittakesaGod smacktoseewhatanidiotyoureallyare."Hegavemeanawkwardkissonthecheekand walkedoutofmybedroomandapartment. Imadelikearobotandputmyclothesonandputmyhairinaponytail.Today,Iwouldhaveto facethatGregwasdeadandwasn'tcomingback,ever.Thebeautifulweddingdresswouldgoin thegarbage,thesameplacewheretherestofmyliferesidedagain.IguessI'mnotmeantto havemuchhappiness.Maybefuturesareoverratedandnotworththefightanyway.Iwasdeep inthoughtwhenIheardavoice."Babe?"Hegotdownonhiskneeinfrontofmeandtookmy hands.Hewasirritatinglyhandsomeinhisblackdesignersuit."Youreadytogo?"Inodded.He tookmyhandandledmeoutoftheapartment. TPDandRangemanwereworkingtogethercoveringsecurityforthefuneralbecauseofthe celebritiesexpectedtoattendandthemediacircusinvolved.Rangerneverstoppedtouching me.NotwhenIhadtospeakwithGreg'sentirefamily,hisfriends,Bruce,andhisband.Iwas numb.Iremembernoddingandwhisperingseveralthankyou'sandIrememberedwhenthe casketwasloweredintotheground.IsaidwhereRangercouldhearme,"Well,Ihave experienceatthisnow."ThenIletgoofhishandandgotupfromthechairsittinginfrontofthe graveandwalkedaway. Hefollowedmequietlytohiscarandopenedthedoorforme.Whenwegottomyapartment,I gotoutofhiscarassoonasitstoppedandbeganwalkingtothebuilding.Iheardhimwalking behindme."GoodbyeRanger.Thanksfortheridetoday."Iopenedmyapartmentandwentto slamthedoorandRangercaughtitandwalkedinbehindme. Hewentinmybedroomandpickedupmyhoneymoonsuitcaseandstartedoutwithit."What areyoudoing?Putthatdown."Hekeptgoingwithitandcamebackandwentinmybedroom andgrabbedanotherbagandmyhandandpulledmetowardthedoor. "Letgoofme.Whatthehellareyoudoing?" "We'regoingtoMiamiforafewdays.MyhousekeeperEllapackedyourbagsandtookcareof yourdressandsheistakingcareofRex."Helockedmydoorandkeptpullingmetothestairs anddown. "Wearenotgoinganywheretogether.That'smyhoneymoonsuitcaseyoutook,youjerk.Putit backinmyapartmentandleave." "Babe,IhavealreadytalkedtoyourparentsandLulaisgoingtoletConnieandMaryLouknow whereyouare.NowI'mnotgoingtoarguewithyou.IwillcarryyouontheplaneifIhaveto.Get inthecarplease."Heopenedthecardoor.Igrowledathimandsatdownintheseat. IgotoutofthecarandstompedupthestairsoftheplaneandnoddedatCaptainKevinandJack. ThenIheadedtotheverybackoftheplaneandsatdown,hopefullyasfarawayfromRangeras Icouldget.Hecamebacktocheckonmeandsighedandshookhisheadandwalkedbackto thefrontoftheplane. WearrivedinMiamiandRangercamebackandunbuckledmeandgrabbedmyhandandpulled metothefrontoftheplaneandInoddedagainatKevinandJack.Hedraggedmedownthe stairstohiscarandopenedthedoorandsetmeinwhileourbagswerebeingremovedand placedinthecar.

Wedroveinsilencetohishouseandgotout.HegotourbagsandcarriedthemtohisroomandI grabbedmineanddraggedthemdownthehallwaytoanotherbedroom.Islammedthedoorand lockedit.Hepickedthelockatdinnertimeandcameinwithatray.Ikeptthewaterbottleandset therestoutsidethedoor. Isatinthedarkandlookedoutatthenightskyandtheoceanmostlyandsleptverylittlethat night.Beforetheearlylightofthemorning,Iduginmysuitcaseandfoundmyjoggingclothes andheadedout.Iputmyheaddownandranandran.Finally,ashadowjoggedupnexttome. "Babeit'stimetoturnaround."Ikeptrunning.HereachedoutandtouchedmeandIreactedwith anger.HegrabbedmyshoulderandIreachedoutandgrabbedhishairandpushedmyhandup andbloodiedhisnoseandhithimintheAdam'sappleandwasgoingforhisribsandgroinand kneeswhenhebegantocountertheattacks."Babe,yourmovesaregood,butyouforgetwho wrotethebook." Hegrabbedmyhandsandpulledthemaroundhiswaistandpulledmetohimandputhischeek tomine.Ipulledbackandlookedintohisface."No.You'renotgoingtotakeadvantage." "I'mnottryingtotakeadvantage.IcareaboutyouandInoticedyou'renotcryingandnotgrieving. Ijustwanttohelpyou." "Thenletmegoandletmegohome." IranashardasIcouldbacktohishouseandwenttotheshower.Icameoutwithatowel wrappedaroundmeandhewaslyingonthebed.Hegotupandcametomeandtookmycurls inhishands."Iloveyourwildcurls.DoyouhaveacombandI'llhelpyoucombitout?" Igroaned,"Doyou?Canyouexcuseme?" IwentintothebathroomandbeganfranticallypullingoutdrawersuntilIfoundwhatIwaslooking for.Itookthescissorsandbegancuttingclosetomyearsuntilallthecurlslayaroundmeonthe floorandthenIlaythescissorsdownandsatonthefloorandbreathedasighofrelief. TBC Previously IranashardasIcouldbacktohishouseandwenttotheshower.Icameoutwithatowel wrappedaroundmeandhewaslyingonthebed.Hegotupandcametomeandtookmycurls inhishands."Iloveyourwildcurls.DoyouhaveacombandI'llhelpyoucombitout?" Igroaned,"Doyou?Canyouexcuseme?" IwentintothebathroomandbeganfranticallypullingoutdrawersuntilIfoundwhatIwaslooking for.Itookthescissorsandbegancuttingclosetomyearsuntilallthecurlslayaroundmeon thefloorandthenIlaythescissorsdownandsatonthefloorandbreathedasighofrelief. Chapter13 AboutahalfhourlaterthedooropenedandRangerwalkedinandstopped."Babe,whatdidyou do?" Ididn'tlookathim."Youlikedthem." "Dios.WhathaveIdonetoyou?Doyoureallyhateme?" HemovedmebacktotheshowertogetallthehairoffmeandIwenttomyroomafterwards, sanstowel,andcrawledintobed.Didn'tevencare.Heleftalunchtrayandadinnertray,whichI

ignored.Isleptalldayandnight.ThenextmorningIstillwantedtostayinbed,butRanger evidentlyhadotherplansforme. Therewasaknockonmydoorandamanpokedhisheadthrough. Ibarked,"What?" "I'mClaudio.Heretocutyourhair." "What?Batmanhatesmyselfdo?" "Don'tknowmam,butIcanhelpyouwiththat."Hegrimacedatme. "Didyoucallmemam?TellBatmantokissmyassonyourwayout." "Iwouldrathernotdothat.Ivaluemylifeandmyownassmam.Pleaseletmefixyourhair.Ican makeitlookverycuteatthislength." "CanyoumakeitantiBatmancute?" "NotsureIunderstand?" "Iwanthimtohateit." "Uh...wellnotmyspecialty,butlacaca(poop)!Myhoroscopedidn'tsaynothingaboutthisshit thismorning.YousureI'mnotononeofthemhiddencamerarealityshows?" "Ohforcripessake!Justcomein.Nosenseinruiningeverybody'slife."Igotupandstomped towardthebathroomandhegaspedandslappedhishandsoverhiseyes.Iputmyhandsonmy hipsandglaredathim."What?" Hewhispered,"You'renaked." "Ohsorry,justaminute."Igrabbedarobeandwentinthebathroomandsatinachairwhilehe clippedaway.Heusedsomeproductsandleftthem."Voila,mam."Thenhewiggledhisbuttout thedoorandmadeaswiftexit.Ilookedinthemirror.Actuallyitwasthecutestshorthaircut.He wasrightandhewastalented.Lacaca! Ishoweredandputonmyclothesandgatheredupthetraysandheadeddownstairs.Ranger cameintothekitchenwhenIdroppedthetraysonthecounterandlookedatme."Babe,youlook beautifulinthisshorthaircut." "ThatiswhatIdidn'twant.Idon'twantyoutolikeanythingaboutme." "Why?" "Ijustdon't!" "Ilikeeverythingaboutyou.Ialwayswill." "No,no,no!Whatdoyouwantfromme?"Iwassoangrywithhim. "Iwantyoutodealwithwhathappenedandgetpastit." "What?Why?Sowecanbefuckbuddiesagain?YoumisseditMr.OpportunistandnowthatI'm freeagainyouwanttotakeupwhereweleftoff?"Iwalkedovertohimandgrabbedhisbuckle andopeneditandunzippedhimandjerkedhispantsdown.Ipushedhimroughlydownonthe couchandpulledmyownshortsoffandthenpulledmypantiestothesideandgrabbedhimand pulledhimtomyentranceandslammeddownward.IthurtandIwantedittohurt.Hiseyeswere wideandhedidn'tmove.Ikeptslammingdownonhimandkeptgoingashegroaned.Whenhe reachedouttograbmetohimIstoppedhishands."StephanieStop...Babeplease..." Iscreamedathim,"Don'tspeak!"Hehadashockedlookonhisfaceandhedidn'tmove.I growledandslammedhiminangerandinpainandthenhecameandIgotupandgrabbedmy shortsandlefttheroom. ThewholetimeIhadfeltnothinginside.Nohintofpleasureorexcitement.IthrewbackasI

walkedoutoftheroom,"Gladitwasgoodforyou.IhateditandIdon'twanttodoitagainwith you,ever!"Icouldn'tthinkofanotherwaytomakehimstoptormentingme. Hecameintheroomthatnightwithatrayandsetitdown.Iwassittinginachairlookingoutthe window."I'mnotleavinguntilyoueatanddrinkalittle.I'mworriedaboutyou."Ihadsomuchpent upangertowardhimandmyrhinobitchwasonoverload.Ididn'tmoveorlookathim."Babe?" ThenIglaredathimandpickeduptheforkandjabbeditintoapieceofchickenandstuckitin mymouthandthentookadrinkoficedteaandthrewtheforkacrosstheroom. "There.Nowyoucanfuckingleave."Hedidahalfgrowlandhalfsighandstartedmuttering,"I'm atalosshere.Idon'tknowwhattodo.Iwanttohelpyou.Carajo(dammit)!Mierda(Shit)!Joder (fuck)!"Thenhewalkedout.Goodriddanceasshole. Thenextmorningheknockedonthedoorandstuckhisheadin."Comedownstairsplease Babe.There'ssomeonehereIwantyoutotalkto." "Idon'twanttotalktoanybody."Hesighedfortheonehundredthtimeinthreedaysandwalked inandgrabbedmyhandandpulledmedownthestairsintothelivingroomwhileIcursedtheday thistormentorwasborn. Awomanstoodupwhenweentered."BabethisisJeanPalmettoandshe'satherapistandI thinkyoushouldtalktoher."Iglaredathim."Idon'tneedatherapist.Myfiancdiedonour weddingday.I'mnotcrazy.I'moutofhere."IturnedtoleaveandRangergrabbedmebythe arm."IamaskingyoutopleasesitandtalktoJean.Youhaven'tcriedatear.You'renotgrieving andyou'renotfeelinganythingthatyoushouldbefeeling."Hepushedmedownonthecouch andlefttheroom. Thewomansatdownandlookedatme."Mr.Manosoisconcernedaboutyou.Heseemstocare aboutyouverymuch."Isnortedandrolledmyeyes. "I'mverysorrythatyoulostyourfiancthewayyoudid.Mysympathies.Idon'tthinkIwouldbe quitemyselfforawhileeitheraftersuchablow.Wecouldjusttalkwomantowoman.Youdidn't cryimmediatelyafteryoufoundout?" "Iwasn'tawaketocry.IguessIblackedout." "Understandable.Whathappenedwhenyouwokeup?" "Igotupinastrangeplace,wasuncomfortable,droppedhalfmyweddinggarbandlefttogo home." "Whatthen?" "Wenttobedforacoupleofdays." "Didyoucryatthattime?" "Nope.Justmostlyslept." "Whatgotyououtofbed?" "Grouchydrillsargeant."Sheraisedaneyebrowatthat. "Whatdidhedo?" "PickedmeupbymyassanddumpedmeintheshowerandtoldmeIstunk."Ilookeduptosee Rangerlounginginthedoorwaywithanamusedgrinonhisface. "Thenwhat?" "Helaidoutfuneralclothesformeandtoldmethateveryoneneedsclosure." "Hesoundslikeasmartmanandagoodfriend.Youwenttothefuneral?Thatwasreallyhard I'msure."

"Yep." "Didyoucrythen?" "No." "Afterthefuneral?" "No.CavemanRangerdraggedmehere."Shesmiledalittleandnodded. "Hesaidyou'renotfeelinganything.Whatdidhemeanbythat?" "OhIfeeloneemotion." "Thatis?" "Anger." "Atyourfiancfordying,atRanger?Whereisitdirected?" "Ohno,nottowardspoorGreg.MostlyatRangerandatmyself." "Whyatyourself?Youdidn'thaveanythingtodowithhisdeath." TearsfilledmyeyesandmychestgotheavyandItriedtoswallowthemdown. "No,"Iwhispered.Shereachedoutandtookmyhands. "Whatisityou'rereallyfeelingabouthisdeath?"Ichoked. "Guilt."Atearfelldownmyface. "WhydoyoufeelguiltyStephanie?"Moretearsfell. IlookedupatRanger,"BecauseIlovedGreg,butIwasinlovewithsomeoneelse."She squeezedmyhandsandnodded. "ThankyouforyourtimeJeanPalmettoexcuseme." Iheadeduptomyroomandbegangettingallmythingstogether.Ihadmycellphoneoutdialing acabwhenRangerwalkedin.Hetookthephonefromme."Stephaniepleaseforgivemefor hurtingyou." "Ineedtogohomenowanddealwiththingsthewaytheyare." "Don'tleave.Weneedtodealwithus." "It'stoolate.Thereisnous!Youmadesureofthat.WereyoupresentwhenIjumpedyou yesterday?Didn'thappen.Nothingthere.Itwaspainful.Over!" "NotformeandIdon'tthinkaftertodayandtalkingwithJeanthatitwouldbethesame.Youjust needsometime." "Don'treallywanttogothereandtryagain.Ican'thandleanymoredisappointmentrightnow. Please,Ijustwanttogohome." Hesighedagainandnoddedandpickeduphisphoneandbarkedsomeorders. Laterthatafternoonwewereonourwayhomeandbothofusweresilentduringtheflight. WepulleduptomyapartmentandIopenedthedoorandheadedupwhileRangercarriedmy bags.Hewentinandcheckedtheapartmentandthendroppedthem.Ithankedhimandsaid goodbye.Helookedatmewithsadeyesandnodded. AlmostthreeweekslaterIgotacallfromTankandhewantedmetocometoBostontomeetthe newfemaleonthatteamandtodoadistractiontrainingjob.Iagreedandpackedabagforthe nextday.RangerpickedmeupandwedrovetoBoston.ForonceRangerwastheonewhotried tomakesmalltalk,butIwasn'tinthemood.Iwantedtojustgetthisdoneandgetbackhometo mysafelittlecocoonIwasbuilding. Whenwearrived,Rangerledmetotheconferenceroomandintroducedmetotheteam.The currentheadofthisofficewasMatthew,orMattastheycalledhim.ThentherewasSanchez,

Vaughn,Vic,Taylor,andBlaine.Theyhadashortmeetingandwentoverthedistractionjob.Hart Lacefieldwasafortytwoyearoldcareerfelonandhehadkilledamanduringarobberyata liquorstore.Hewasatypicallosertypeandlikedbooze,women,anddrugs,andweweregoing todotheapprehensionatoneofhisfavoriteweekendhangoutbars. Iwasintroducedtothenewgirl,Mona,andwewerenowonourwaytotheseventhfloor apartmentthateveryRangemanofficehad.Sheflouncedofftheelevatoranddeclared Rangemanthebestbeefcakeplaygroundeverandannouncedshehadsethersightsonthe ownertheMexicanwhateverwouldbepussywhippedinnotime.Iraisedaneyebrow. Iwantedtocorrecther,butIthoughtIwouldleaveittoRangerbecausehedeservedthisone. NotonlywassheawrongfitforRangeman,butwhowasthepersonthathiredher?Thiswas seriousandsomeonecouldgethurt.Herdistractionapparelwassluttierthan...itjustbrought brotheltomind.Herbleachedblondehair,fakeboobs,andjigglyasswentperfectwithheroutfit. Iwentoverwithherwhathappensduringanormaldistractionandtoldherthatifanythinggoes wrongtheguyswouldbeourbackupandwecouldtrustthem.Ihandedherthemicand earpiece."Whadda'Idowiththese?"Imumbled,"Stickitupyournastytwat,I'msurehalfthebar willbespeakingthroughitatsomepointtonightanyway."ThenIcouldn'tbelievewhatIwatched herdo.Shewiggledherhipsandsaid,"Aw..kay.I'mready."Jeez,thisskankgavenewmeaning tobleachedblondebraindrain. Whenwegotinthecartogototheclub,RangeraskedmeaboutMona.Ilookedathim."Iwould fireherandtheassholethathiredher."Heraisedbotheyebrows."Ohyeah,shecalledyoua 'Mexican'whatever."Thecornersofhismouthtwitchedandhenodded.ThenIsnorted,"She'sa realbrainiactoo.IwasbeingsarcasticwhensheaskedmewhattodowithhermicandIkindof mumbledtostickitupherandguesswherehermicis?" "Babe."Thenheburstoutlaughing."Arewegoingtobeokay?I'vemissedyou.Ididn'trealize howmuchIwould." "IguesswehavetobeRanger.Wehavetoworktogethersometimes.Webuiltafriendshipand haveahistory.Wejustscreweditupwiththesex."Hesmiled,butthelookinhiseyeswassad. TBC

Someofmynewreadersareworried.MyfollowersknowthatIcangiveareaderwhiplashwith mytwistsandsurprises.Mystoriesdohavemeaningandthecharactersexperiencerealand sometimesrawfeelings.TheyhavetoworkforthoseHEA's!Staytuned... Chapter14 WegotoutofthecaratthebarandRangerspoketoMattamomentandMattlookedatMona andwalkedoverandgaveheranewmicandtoldhertheproperwaytoplaceitandsheglared overatRangerandme.TheydidamiccheckandRangertoldMonatolosethechewinggum becausehersnappingandpoppingwasloudanddistracting.Shespitittowardusandglared again.Boy,SkankellahasnoideawhoshewasdealingwithandIwasn'tjusttalkingaboutme. Rangerkissedmycheekandtoldmetobecarefulandwalkedinthebar.Twootherguyswentin andInoddedforMonatofollowme.Theskipwasn'tinthebarwhenwearrived,soweordereda

drinkatthebarandgotatableandwaited.WhenMonawenttosuckherdrinkdown,Igrabbedit andsetitbackdown."Clearhead.Wedon'thaveaguybartendingtonight."Shehissedatme, "You'reabuzzkillofabitchtoworkwith." Knowingthatthedumbsluthadalreadyforgottenthatshewasmiced,Isaid,"Dittoandthisisa jobincaseyouforgot.Ifyouhaveanythingelseonyourmindyougoaheadandspillit." "Idon'tknowwhyarichguylikethatMexicanhottieRangerwouldbeinterestedinaflatchested, fatassed,fuzzyheaded,homelybitchlikeyou.Heprobablyhastoputasackoveryourheadjust toscrewyouintheassandsharesyouwithallhismenbecauseyou'reuglyandpatheticandhe feelssorryforyou."Ismiledatherandpointedtomyearpiece.Sheraisedhereyebrowsand glaredatme.Oh,shefigureditoutwithoutmehavingtospellitoutwithpictures. ThenIheard,"We'lltakecareofthislaterBabe.Frontdoor."Iturnedandsureenoughitwasour skip.Wewaitedforhimtowalkinandorderadrinkanditwasn'tlongbeforeheandhisfriend weresniffingaroundourtable."Canwebuyyouladiesadrink?" IhadpouredbothourdrinksonthefloornearthetablewhenLacefieldandfriendcameinthe door.Isaid,"Sure." Theycamebackwiththedrinks.Isaid,"Thisplaceisprettydead.Youguysknowofabetter placetogo?" "Thisplaceisfineforme." "Youguyshaveanysmokeoutinyourcar?Icouldusesome." "Wedon'thavetogooutside."HegrabbedmyarmandtheotherguygrabbedMona'sandthey startedtowardtherestrooms. Isaid,"Whoa,waitaminuteguys.Wherearewegoing?" "Youwantsmokeandthat'swhatwe'regoingtodo.Youplayinggames?" "No.Ijustdon'twanttogetarrestedinhere.Maybeweshouldgosomewhereelse.Yourplace?" IturnedtowardthedoorandhegrabbedmyarmandstartedpullingandthenMonaturnedand rantowardRangerandgrabbedhim.Ohshit.Lacefieldlookedatherandthenatme."What's goingonhere?Youacouplelittleprickteasers?Whatareyouupto?" "No.MyfriendisjustalittleditzyandIthinkshespottedaguysheknows.Letmegogether."I walkedovertoMona.Isaidquietly,"Comewithme.Weareheadingtowardthedoor."Igrabbed herhandandbeganpulling.WewentaboutthreestepswhenLacefieldstartedtowardusand Monastoppedandbeganscreaming."Whatthehell?"Hepulledaknifeandlookedaround.Then allhellbrokeloose. ItriedpullingMonaawaytowardthedoorandshejuststoodandscreamed.TwoRangemen wererunningupbehindLacefieldandRangermovedintoactionrunningforwardandpushedme awaytowardthedoorasascufflebegan.AllthewhileMonajustkeptscreaming.The RangemenfinallysubduedLacefieldandhisfriendandRangergrabbedMonatryingtopullher awayandshewasfightinghim.Iwalkedoverandsluggedherinthejawandshefinallystopped andswayedandhecaughtherandwerantowardthedoor. RangerstumbledbackwardsoutthedoorwithMonaandthenletgo.Helookedatmyfaceand smiledandthenslumpedtotheground.EveninhisblackbuttondownshirtIcouldseethered stainspreadingacrosshischest.Icalledforthemedic,"Jeffrey!"ThenIyelledout,"Someone call911andsecurethescene!" Isunktomykneesnexttohim."Ranger!"Irippedhisshirtopen.Thebloodwasspreading

rapidlyacrosshischest.Iscreamed,"Helpus.Weneedhelphere."Bloodbegantoseepoutof thecornerofhismouthandhecoughed.JeffreywastherewithhisbagandrolledRangeronhis sidetolettheblooddrain."Ishegoingtobealright?" "Don'tknowwhattheknifehityet.Couldbealung."Ranger'seyelidsbegantobatandcloselike hewaslosingconsciousness. "No,pleasestaywithmeRanger.Please"Jeffreywascheckinghisvitalsandlookedatme withaworriedface.Iheardtheambulancesirenasitpulledintothelot."Carlosyoulistentome. I...loveyouandIneedyouCan'tloseyoutoo."TheEMT'stookoverandpushedmeaway. Behindme,Monasnarked,"Wellthatsurewentwell!Who'sthesecondincharge?I'lltakedoor numbertwo."Iturnedaroundandglaredather."Youphony,hateful,golddigging,bigotofa skank!Adamngoodmanmightbedyingrightnowforsavingyoursorryassafteryouscrewed upthisjobtonight."ThenIhauledoffandpunchedherinthenoseandjudgingbythecrunch,I brokeit.TheEMTwinced."Don'teventhinkaboutputtingthisslutinthesameambulanceas thatgoodman,butyoucantiearopetothebackanddragherassbehindyou." Iturnedaroundandyelled."Iwantthisbitchandthepersonthathiredheroffthepremisesand outofmysightnow!" ThejerknamedBlainestompedinfrontofme,"Youdon'thaveanyauthorityhere!" "Areyoutheonefuckingtheskank?Shejustputlivesindanger!" IpulledoutmyphoneandcalledTank."Yo?" "Yo.ThisdistractionjustwenttoshitbecauseofyourmannamedBlaineandhisskankMona. Rangerwasknifedsavingtheskank'ssorryassandit'sbad.Itoldthembothtoleavethe premisesandBlainejustquestionedmyjudgementandMattis...hellIdon'tknowwhereheis." "Putthemotherfuckeronthephone!"IhandedBlainethephone. "Incaseyoudon'tknowasshole,you'llbespeakingtothesecondincommandoftheentire companyandhecanbearealscaryfuckerwhenprovoked!"IheardTankbellowingovertheline foracoupleminutesandthenBlainehandedmemyphoneandgrabbedMonaandstomped awayandgotinatruckandleft. Therewasnobodyintheparkinglotnowexceptthemedicandmetosecurethescene.Then nearlythewholeteamincludingMattcameoutofthebarwiththetwomenincustody.Istood therewithRanger'sbloodallovermeandIglaredatMatt.Iyelled,"Someonegettheskiptothe policestation,securethisfuckingsceneandgetmetothehospitalnow!"Whatafuckedup messthiswas.Thisofficeneededanoverhaul.Talkaboutunawareofyoursurroundings,these guyswereabunchofboobs. OneSUVpulledoutofthelotwiththeskipandhisbuddyandanotherpulleduptomeandIgotin withVic.Wedidn'tsayanythingaswespedtothehospital.Ijumpedoutandraninside.Atthe deskIinquiredaboutthestabbingvictim. "Hewasrushedtosurgerymiss.Internalbleeding.There'sawaitingroomonthethirdfloorfor surgery." Myphonerang."Bomber,we'reonourway.Youatthehospital?" "Yes.He'sinsurgery.Alltheysaidwashehasinternalbleeding.CometothethirdfloorofMass General.Tank,hereallylookedbad.Therewassomuchblood." "Bomber,henevertoldyou,butyouandIbothhavepowerofattorneyforhim.Ifheneeds authorizationforanytreatment,youcangetitdone.He'satoughonelittlesister.We'llbethere

soon." Twohourslater,Tank,Lester,andBobbyfinallyarrived.KevinandJack,thepilots,werewith them.Ihuggedallofthem."Bobby,canyoupleasecheckwithsomeone?Wehaven'theardone wordyet." TankandLestercalledalltheRangemenpresentintoacircletogetarundownonthedistraction andanideaofwhatwentwrong.Hebarked,"Matt,report!"Tankwasbellowingandpointinghis fingerinMatt'sfaceandpointingtomeandtheoperatingrooms.Whoa,Icouldseesteam comingoffhisbaldhead."Youdidn'thavefuckingcontrolofyourteam!Whywouldyouletan idiotlikeBlainetalkyouintohiringher?Youdidn'ttalktoher?Youcouldn'tseeherforwhatshe was?ThegoddamnsamecriteriaapplyforwomenandmenatRangeman.Wedon'thire unqualified,incompetentpeople.Awoman,acontractemployeefromoutoftown,ranyour scenetonightanddidabetterjobthanyou.Ishouldfireallofyou!Mybestfriendisinthat operatingroomfightingforhislife!Dammit!" Tankwasstompingaroundincircleshuffingandpuffing.IfinallywentovertoTank."Buddycalm down,yourbloodpressureisprobablysohighyoucouldstrokeout.Wedon'tneedanotherman down.Givemeahug."HedidhugmeandIcouldfeelsomeofhisanxietyreleasing."I'mgoing overtheaudiotapesandIwantyourversionlater.Headsaregoingtofuckingroll."Ididn'ttellhim thatIhadalreadythoughtaboutthat.Lesterwasapissedoffmesstoo.Whenhereachedforthe knivesinhisbootandbeganplayingwiththem,Ihadtogogivehimsomecomfortaswellbefore hescaredtheshitoutthehospitalstaffandtheotherwaitingfamilies. Finally,adoctorcameout."FamilyofMr.Manoso?"Allofusraisedourhands.Henoddedand walkedtothemiddleoftheroom."Hemadeitthroughthesurgery.Theknifepenetratedoneof hislungsandaprettymajorbloodvessel.Helostalotofbloodbeforehegothere.Heisstable, butstillincriticalconditiontonight." "Canweseehim?CanIstayinhisroomtonightwithhim?" "Oneatatime.He'llbesleepingmostofthenight.Onepersoncanstay." Tanksaid,"Thankyoudoctor."Thedoctornoddedandturnedaway. ItoldTankandLesterandBobbytogoinbeforeme.Iwouldgoinlastandstaybyhissidefor thenight.TherestoftheguysweretoldtogobacktoRangemanorhome.Theguysheadedoff toahotelandIfinallygottogoinandseeRanger. Hewaspaleandhookeduptoallthesesoftlybeepingmachinesandtheywerestillgivinghim blood.Itookhishandandsqueezedandforthefirsttimeinalmostamonth,Ireallywantedto cry.Icouldn'timaginethevoidinmyheartandmylifeifIlostRanger.Hewasalwaystherefor me.Hisstrengthhadalwaysgivenmestrengthandcomfort.IsuddenlyrealizedthatIneeded thismaninmylifelikeIneedair.LosingGregwasatragedyandIfeltguiltandpainoverhisloss, butlosingRangerwouldbetheendofmetoo. IpulledmychaircloseandkepthishandinminewhileIleanedbackandclosedmyeyes.Iwoke awhilelaterandlookedintodrowsydarkchocolateeyes."Hey.CanIgetyouanything?" "Thirsty." "Ibet.Youwereprettymuchdrainedofyourliquids."Ipouredsomeicewaterandputastrawin andgavehimsomesips."Better?"Henodded. "Ishouldhaveremovedthatwoman.Trustedyou." "Stop.Thisisnottheplaceortimetotalkaboutthat.Theskipisincustody.Theskankandher

pimparelonggonewithabrokennosetoboot." "I'msorryBabe." "Don'tyoudothis.TankandLesterarerearrangingtheBostonofficeaswespeakandhavinga goodtimedoingit!"Hegrinnedalittle. "Ranger?" "YesBabe?" "Incaseyoudon'tknowit,Iloveyou."Ikissedhishand. "Iknow."Hiseyesweresleepyandheclosedthem. Iwhispered,"Iwon'tleaveyou." "Iknow."Thenhewasasleepagain. TBC Iknowthewhiplashthingagain... previously "I'msorryBabe." "Don'tyoudothis.TankandLesterarerearrangingtheBostonofficeaswespeakandhavinga goodtimedoingit!"Hegrinnedalittle. "Ranger?""YesBabe?" "Incaseyoudon'tknowit,Iloveyou."Ikissedhishand. "Iknow."Hiseyesweresleepyandheclosedthem. Iwhispered,"Iwon'tleaveyou." "Iknow."Thenhewasasleepagain. Chapter15 Hisnursecameinandwokehim."Mr.Manoso,Ineedtocheckyourvitalsandtalkaboutpain andwe'llgetyoubathedandreadyforbreakfast. Isaidtoher,"DoyoumindifIdothatforhim?Youcouldjustbringmeanewgownandwashbin withsupplies." ShesmiledandnoddedandcheckedhisvitalsfirstthenwenttogetmetheitemsIneeded. Itookthebinandfilleditwithwarmwaterandgentlywashedhisfaceandshavedhim.Iwashed hischestandunderhisarmsandhisprivatesanddownhislegsandhisbeautifulfeet.Itwasn't sexy.Hehadacatheterandtubesandbandages.Iwashedhimlikeyoudosomeoneyoulove anddeeplycareabout.HiseyesneverleftmeasIwashedeverypartofhim. Hesqueezedmyhand."Ranger,youwoulddothesameforme.Nopriceright?"Hesmiledand nodded. Igentlyremovedhishospitalgownandreplaceditandhelpedhimbrushhisteeth."Feelbetter?" "YesBabe.Thankyou." "Good.I'llgetyourbreakfastinhereandthenthenursecangiveyousomefeelgoodmedicine." Ihelpedhimtoeatandthentheguysbegancomingin.Ileftandgavethemsomeroom. IwassittinginthewaitingroomwhenTankcameupandsatdownnexttome. "Areyoutwodoneplayinggames?"Iwassortofstunned. "Well,Iwouldliketobe.It'snotuptomeTank.He'ssocomplicated,butIlovehimsomuch." "Iknowandhelovesyou.That'swhat'ssofrustratingandmakesuswanttolockyouuptogether

andthrowawaythekeyuntilyouhashyourshitoutsoyoucangetonwithyourlivesandbe happy.YouareperfectforhimBomberandyoucareaboutRangemanandus.You'recomingto workforus.Weneedyou." "IthinkImightneedallofyoutooTank.I'vebeenfeelingalittlelostlately,likeI'vechangedandI don'treallyfitwhereI'matinmyliferightnow." "Yourplaceiswithuslittlegirl.Lesterhaslineduptwowomenforyoutointerviewherebefore youleaveandthenwhenwegetbackyouandLulaarecomingtoworkforRangeman.We'lltake careofVinnie." ThenextmorningRangerwasmoreawakeandalittlefriskywithhishands."Youjustwant anotheroneofthosespongebathsdon'tyoubigboy?"Hegrowledatme. "Well,unfortunatelyyoucan'tleaveandyoucan'thaveanyfununtilyouusethebigboypotty." Hegrumbled."Thefoodheresucks.It'sinedible.HowamIgoingtogetbacktoanormal evacuationscheduleonthisshit?" "Wait.Aresayingthatyoudoahthatonaschedule?" "OfcourseIdo.Don'tyou?" "NoooIgowhenIgotta'go.Isthisamilitarything? "Yes,anditworksincivilianlifetoo.Makesyouhealthierandmoreproductive." "Jeez,youmilitaryguysareweird.Theyteachyouhowtowipetoo?" "Actuallytheydo.Amans'packcontainsonerollofpaperandsupplieshavetolastona mission." Iscrewedupmyface."Ewww.SomehowIcanseeGordonscaringsomepooryoungrecruits into...whenordered,but" "Babe,noneedtogothere." Hegrinnedatme."Myevacuationtimeisat0900." "Gross!Isodidn'tneedtoknowthat." "YesyoudobecausewearegoingtobecohabitatingwhenIgetoutofhere." "Whatmakesyousosureaboutthat?" "Becauseyousaidyouloveme.Youlovethegood,thebadandtheuglythatisme." "Thatlastpartwassotrueexceptfortheuglypart.Whydon'twemakethatstubbornandadda fewmoreadjectivestothatlist.I'llcomehomewithyoutohelpyourecuperate.Wouldthatmake youhappy?"Iwastryingtoforgivehimandlovetheflawedandcomplicatedmanhewasand maybeacceptwhathecouldgiveme.Hehadbeentryingtoletmeknowhewasthereforme too.Wewereamesseduppair. "YesBabe." Ikissedhim."Makefriendsthenwiththebigpottysowecangohome."Hegrinnedatme. Twodayslater,thedoctorwassigningtheorderstoreleaseRangertoBobby'scareat Rangeman.LesterwasstillstayingbehindtojerksomeknotsinsomeBostonRangemantails andIfeltsorryforthembecauseLesterwaslikeAli.Hecould'floatlikeabutterflyandstinglikea lethalbee'.Whenhegotdonewiththem,theonlyonesleftstandingwouldbetherealmenand theywouldbeloyalandgoodemployees. IpackedacouplebagsandRexandmovedinwithRangertotakecareofhim.Hishousekeeper EllaandIworkedtogethertomakehimashappyandcomfortableaspossible.Inlessthana weekhehadgonefromgladtobeoutofthehospitaltoagrouchybearandnowthismorninghe

wasbeingoverlyfrisky. "Ranger,yourdoctorsaidnophysicalactivitylikesexfortwoweeks." Hepulledthecoverdownandexposedhimself."Howaboutjusttouching?Alittlekiss?" "Jeez,yourpainmedsmustbereallygood.That'sveryimpressiveMr.Manoso.Behave."Istill lickedmylipsalittleanyway.Ilovedthisman'sperfectpenis.Ineededtodosomethingtotame thebeast.ThenIgotanidea.Icoveredhimagainandkissedhim.Ilookedatthetentandpointed atit."PutthatdownandbegoodincaseEllacomesin.WhenIgetbackI'lldealwithit."Abig boyishgrinspreadacrosshisface.Itwasnotinnocent.Nosirree..itwasyouthfulandnaughty. IwenttomyapartmentandgrabbedabagofgoodiesIhadnotusedyetandputitallinaplain sackanddrovebacktoRangeman.IwalkedintoRanger'sbedroomandhiseyebrowsfurrowed andhegrouched,"It'sabouttimeyougotback!"ThegrouchyRangerwasback.Ijustignored himandsetaboutgettingthingsready. Ipulleda'donotdisturb'signoutofmybagandhungitontheoutsideofthedoorknobandthen walkedovertothebedandpulledthePleasureTreasure'sbagoutoftheplainsackandsatiton thebed.Ibeganlayingoutmytools."Littlering(check),warmingmassageoil(check),lube (check),littlevibrator(check),bigvibrator(check),pinwheel(check),clamps(check),soft flogger(check),ostrichfeather(check),gladIthoughttograbafewoftheseafterthatfight,and beads(check),onetubeof'coldasice'(check)."Probablywon'tneedallthis,butagirlneedsto beprepared.IlookedatRanger."Okaybadboy,let'spullthatsheetdown,putthosekneesup andgettowork." "Babe?"Botheyebrowswereupandhehadaworriedlookonhisface. IwhistledwhileIworked.PoorRangerwentfrommoaningtobreathinghardtoyellingandthen camethegrowlingandsomewhimpering,softcriesandmaybetherewasonelittlescream. Yikes,wheredidthatvoicecomefrom?Backitup,backitup.Herewego,morewhimperingand thenanotherlongloudyellandabigsighandIthinkthat'salightsnoreIhearnow.Icleanedhim up,tuckedhimin,cleanedmytools,packedthemupandputthemawayandpattedmyselfon thebackforajobwelldone.Igrabbedthesignandswitchedknobsandwalkedoutandrubbed myhandstogether. Tank,LesterandBobbyturnedtolookatmewithwideeyes.Tankasked,"FuckBomber,Ismy boystillbreathin'?Whatdidyoudotohim?" "Hewasalittletestyandalittletoofriskytoday.Itookcareofitandputhimtosleep." Lesterwenttothedoorandlookedinathissleepingformandhissmilingfaceandthenhesaid, "Pleasedothesamethingtomethatyoudidtohim" "Bobbycamewalkingtothebedroomdoorway,"DoIneedtocheckonhim?" "Yeah,youmightjustgivehisvitalsaquickcheck.Heshouldbeoutforawhilethough."Allthree guyswerestandinginthedoorwaywithraisedeyebrowsandhalfgrins.Thateyebrow101class mustcomerightafterthetoiletpaperlessoninbasictraining. ThatnightwhenIbroughtinRanger'sdinnertray,hewassittingupwithabigsmileonhisface.I kissedhim."Feelingbetter?" "Yes,Babeandthankyou." "Lestertookonelookatyouandbeggedmetodothesamethingtohim."Helaughed. "SpeakingofLester,whoneedsonewhenwehaveyouandyourtorturekit.Weshouldjustsend youtostraightenouttheBostoncrewandbringthemtotheirknees."

"Yes,butmydisciplinecamewithsomepleasuretoo.I'mprettysureLesterjustleftthemin pain." "I'mprettysureyou'rerightBabe."Igotatrayformeandsatnexttohimonthebedandweate andchattedandthenIcleanedup.Hewentrightbacktosleepinabouthour.Ipulledononeof hissofttshirtsandsnuggledinnexttohim.Greg'stragicdeathwasstillrawforme,butitfelt goodtobeclosetoRangeragain. Acoupledayslater,Rangerwasupanddoinglightworkinhisapartmentofficeonhiscomputer. HewasgettingaroundfineandEllaandBobbyweretakinggoodcareofhim.Iwentinandput myarmsaroundhisneckandgavehimahug.Hesqueezedmyhandandgavemeakissonthe cheek. "YouaredoingreallygoodnowandI'mgoingtogohometodayandleaveyouwithEllaand Bobby." Heturnedtolookatme."Pleasestay." "RangerIcan't.Ineedsometime.Webothdo."Hetookmyhands. Hetookmyhandandledmetothelivingroomandwesatdownonthecouch."Babe,Iwas wrongbeforeandIwasbeingacoward.Everythingyousaidbackthenwasrighton.Youwere alreadyinmyheartandImadeaterriblemistakebylettingyougo.Wedidhavearelationship alreadyanditwasagoodone." "Itwasgood.Itwasalmostperfectexceptitwastemporary." "Iwantmorethistime.Ican'tevendescribetoyouwhatitfeltliketofindoutthatyouweregoing tomarryanotherman.Ineverwanttofeelthatwayagain." "I'msorry.IwaitedforyouandImadehimwaitforalongtimeandhewaspatient.Howmuch moredoyouwant?" "Iwantitall.Lifepartnerinmybedforaslongaswebreathe." "Becausewhy?" "BecauseIloveyouStephaniePlumandIdon'twanttobewithoutyou.Myheartknewthatyou wereforme.Myheadwasjusttoostupidtoacceptit." "Ranger,Iloveyoutoo." "IknowandI'maluckyman." Sixmonthslater,IwaslivingwithRangerinaveryhappypartnershipandworkingforhis companyfulltime.Lulawasalsoafulltimeemployeeandeffectivelyshakingupthingsinthis previouslyallmalecompany.Workwasbeingdonetoconvertthecompanytoafullfledged equalopportunityworkplace.Themenwereactuallyhappyaboutit.Theleaderswerehappy, theemployeeslikedthislightersideofRangemanandthebusinesswasthrivingwiththehelpof twowomenandafemininetouch. Rangersentmeadozenrosesonedayandoneoftheguysbroughtthemtomyofficeabout lunchtime.Acardwasincludedaskingmetodinnerthatnight.WhenIwalkedintothe apartment,therewasnoonethere.However,softmusicwasplayingandtherewasasexyblue designersheathdresswithlowbackandslituptothereonthebedwithManoloBlahniksand matchingclutchbag,sexythong,thighhighhoseandalittlejewelryboxwithasapphireand diamondbracelet.Therewasanote: Babe, Beheretopickyouupat1900for

dinner. Loveyou, R Mymanofsomanywords.Ishoweredandlotionedandputonminimalmakeupwithpinklip gloss,andputsomeshineproductinmycurlsandfingerdriedthem.Thedressfitperfectand sodidtheshoes.WhenIwalkedintothelivingroom,Igasped.Rangerwaswearingaslimfitting HugoBosssuitwithhishairslickedbackandFerragamoshoesandhelookedlikeaman straightoutofthe1960'sera.Helookedlikeamalemodel.Wow,thiswasmyman.Allsixfootof brawnandlatinhot.Mine... TBC FYIorTMITheevacuationthingandthetoiletpaperlessoninmilitarybasictrainingisabsolutely true.IhadtositthroughtheTPlessonacoupletimebecausemyDadneverforgotthattraining andgrouchedthatwealwayswastedtoomuch.LOL Previously Babe, Beheretopickyouupat1900for dinner. Loveyou, R Mymanofsomanywords.Ishoweredandlotionedandputonminimalmakeupwithpinklip gloss,andputsomeshineproductinmycurlsandfingerdriedthem.Thedressfitperfectand sodidtheshoes.WhenIwalkedintothelivingroom,Igasped.Rangerwaswearingaslimfitting HugoBosssuitwithhishairslickedbackandFerragamoshoesandhelookedlikeaman straightoutofthe1960'sera.Helookedlikeamalemodel.Wow,thiswasmyman.Allsixfoot ofbrawnandlatinhot.Mine... Chapter16 "Hi." "YoulookbeautifulBabe." "Sodoyou.Channeling'MadMen'areyou?It'sahotlookonyou." "Doesitmakeyouwantme?" "Youbetitdoes." "Good.Can'twaittilllater." "Wherearewegoing?" Hetookmyhandandweheadedtothefiredoorandstairsandupthetheroof.Theroof?He openedthedoorandIgasped.Thereonthehelicopterpadwasalittlecaftableandchairs. Standingcandelabrasandsmallcandleswerelitallaroundtheroofandflowerpetalswere everywhere.InthecorneroftheroofwasabigspotlightandtheBatmansignalwasshiningup intothesky.Iputmyhandovermymouth."Wheredidyougetthat?It'sgreat!" "Ihaditmadeforyou,fortonight."Softmusicbegantoplaycomingfromsomespeakersonthe sideofthebuilding. ThedooropenedandEllacamethroughpushingacartandstoppednexttothetableandsmiled

andwalkedbackthroughthedoor.Rangeruncoveredthefoodandnoddedtothetablebehind me.ThemealwasliketheseafoodplatterthatwesharedinMiami.ItwasdeliciousandEllahad madeakeylimepietogowithit. Whenwewerefinished,Rangertookmyhandandpulledmetothecenteroftheroofandputhis armsaroundme.Ilaymyheadagainsthisshoulderandwedancedslowlytogetherforalong timeandthenhehitabuttononhiswatchandsmiledatme.Hegotdownononekneeand lookedupatmeandpulledaboxoutofhispocketandopenedittoshowmeawhopping princesscutdiamondringwithsmalldiamondsarounditanddowntheband."Stephanie,my Babe,willyoumarryme?"IturnedandalltheRangemenwereontheroofandLula,Ellaandher husbandLuis. "Okay,soyoubroughtallthesebigscarymenupheretointimidatemeintosayingyes,right?" Hegrinned. "Wellitworked.Yes!"Iputmyarmsaroundhisneckandkissedhim.Everyonebeganclapping andwhoopingandwhistlingandIheardseveral,'it'saboutdamntimes'. TwomonthslaterwewereonRanger'splanewithourclosestfamilyandfriendsonourwayto NewOrleans.TherewasTankandLula,LesterandElisa,BobbyandhisgirlCheryl,MaryLou andLenny,ConnieandGordon,MomandDadandGrandmaandmysisterValandher boyfriendAlbert.Ranger'sbrotherMarcoandwifeandsisterLuciaandherhusbandNicolasand Ranger'sparentsandAbuelawereontheplaneandpushingitscapacitylimits.Thepilots,Kevin andJackweregoingtomakeanothertripbacktoTrentontopickupmoreRangemenandall theirgirlssotheycouldstaytheweekendtoo. IknewthatIcouldn'thaveaweddinginorneartheBurgafterwhathappenedwithGregandI evenhadaproblemwhenitcametochoosingaweddingdressandIcouldn'tdoit.Rangertook overeverythingandwedecidedtohaveaquietandintimateceremonywithjustveryfewclose friendsandfamilyawayfromhome. RangerhadbookedafamousPlantationoutsideofNewOrleansontheMississippiriver.Itwas builtin1839andwasthemostphotographedandromanticPlantationinthesouth.Internationally renownedforitsalleyoftwentyeightevenlyspacedandintertwinedgiantliveoaktreesleadingto thehouse,believedtobenearly300yearsold.Theyhadacajun/creolerestaurantonthe grounds,nineteenthcenturybedandbreakfastcottagesandatrulyromanticsettingfora weddingandreception.Rangerbookedtheentireplaceforthewholeweekendjustforus. ThePlantationcuratorsandstaffhadassistedRangerwithweddingdecorations,flowers, receptiondecorations,photographer,foodandcakealongwithalocalNewOrleansjazzband. Wecheckedinandhadaleisurelyrehearsaldinnerinthecajunrestaurantthatnightand celebratedalittletoomuch. ThenextmorningRangerknockedonmydoorandwokemeandsentmetooneoftherooms setupforthebridespartyandtherewasaprofessionalmasseuseandahairdresseranda couplegirlsfromhersalon.Allofusgirlssquealedandthemomslikedittoo.Insteadofbeinga paininthesphincter,mymotherwassurprisinglyonherbestbehaviorandI'mguessingitwas becauseshewasthinkingthatmyinnerspinsterwasduetoemergesoonandthismightbemy lastchanceatmarriage. Rangerhadalittle'hairofthedog'traydeliveredintheformofapitcherofmimosasand champagneglasses.Mydreamymanwasda'bombandIcouldn'tbelievehewasabouttobeall

mine.IwasabouttogetthatfuturethatIfoughtsohardfor.Ihadkissedhimgoodnightand stayedwithConnielastnightandIwasgiddythinkingabouthimbeingmyhusbandtonight. Iwhisperedtomymom,"I'mdependingonyoutokeepaneyeonGrandmatoday.Wedon't wantarepeatoflastnight."Mymothergrimacedandshivered.Grandmawasdangeroussober, butwithacoupleorthreeglassesofwineinhershewaseightyyearsofdisasteronwheels. Disaster?Wheels?Wow,itneverdawnedonmethatmybadluckindestroyingmywheels couldbeinherited. Anyway,lastnightGrandmagotblottoanddecidedtogoforatabledance.Shemadeitonto oneofthetablesonherhandsandknees,butwhenshewenttostandupshewobbledandfell offintoBobby'slapandwentforagoodgrope.HejumpedupandpushedherintoTank'slapand shegotarealgoodgriponhimandwouldn'tletgoandhejumpedupandraninacirclewithher foraminuteandwrestledherlooseandtossedherintoRanger'sbrotherMarco'slapwhereshe gotinanothergoodpinchandheyelpedwhenfinally,Gordonbarkedatthestunnedmenandthe chaosonelittleoldladyhadwreakedandpickedherupbyherredbikinipantiesandpantyhose whichwereshowingduetothescuffleandwalkedheroutoftheroomlikeasackofpotatoes whiletheroomofstunnedfaceswatchedthewords'NumeroUnohottie'onherlittlesaggybutt disappeararoundthecorner.GottogiveittoGrandmaforgettinginthespiritandembracingmy newlatinfamily.However,everylatinmanintheroomwaseithercoveringhiseyesorgrimacing. Theyevidentlydidn'tquiteappreciateherenthusiasm. WhenGordoncamebackandlookedatthestillstunnedmen,hebarked,"Ateasemenshe's sleepingitoff."Drillsergeantswerereallygoodatrestoringorder.Helookedatmeandgrinned andsaid,"NowIknowwhereyougetthatcrazyshitPlum!"Ilostitthenandbentoverinafitof laughterandthentherestofthegirlsdidthesame.Rangerstartedlaughing,Lesterwashowling andeventuallyeveryonewaslaughingitwassocontagiousanditlastedforatleastfifteen minutesbecauseassoonasonepersonwouldstopthenanotherwouldstartagain. WedecidedtoseewhatRangerhadpickedoutformebeforethehairdresserdidmyhair.We unzippedthewhitebagandIgaspedatthedress.Therewasanoteattachedtotheinsideofthe bag. Babe, WhenIsawthis,itremindedmeofyour shortcascadingcurlswhenyoufirstcut yourhair.Sobeautiful.Hopeyoulikeit. Yoursapphireswillbelovelywiththis. Blue,tomatchyoureyesismyfavorite coloronyou. Mylove, R Thedresswassimpleandelegant.Itwaswhiteandstraplesswithasweetheartnecklineand hadlittleflutterychiffonrufflescascadingfromthewaistallthewaydowntothehem.Ithada beadedbeltwithaswarovskicrystalbowinfront.Therewasnoveil.Justalittletiaramatching thebeltwiththebow.IopenedaboxthatsaidBenjaminAdamsLondonandinsidewereapairof bridalshoestomatchthedresswithpeeptoeandacrystalwrappedbow.Abagwithlingerie heldawhitecorsetwithgarterandthighhighhosewithalittleblueandwhitebridalgarterwitha

bow.Icouldn'thavepickedanythingbettermyselfanditmadetheensembleallthemorespecial becausemymanhadchosenitbecausethiswashisvisionformeonourweddingday.The hairdresserandIlookedateachotherandsmiledandwebothsaidtogether,"Hairdefinitelyup." Myhairhadgrownacoupleinchesandshehadpulleditbackandupintoatwistandletthetop layersspringfreeandplacedthetiarawithinthecurls.Iputmyjewelryonandthenthelingerie andfinallythedressandwithoutafitting,itwasperfect.Itdidn'thaveabigheavytrainanditwas lightandcomfortableandIfeltlikeaprincess.Walkingintothenextroomandhearingallthegirls gaspconfirmedthatitwasaspecialdress. Lulasaid,"Damngirl!YoulooklikeoneofthemDisneyprincesses.Batmanpickedthatforyou?" Inodded.MaryLouhadherhandoverhermouth,LuciawasjumpingupanddownandConnie wasshakingherhead.Elisasaid,"IfLesterevermansupandpopsthequestion,Rangeris goingtobemyweddingplannerMmm..mmm..mm..girl." At1600hoursonthenose,thepatiodoorsopenedandIsteppedthroughonmyDad'sarmand thistimemygroomwasthereandwaitingformewithasmileandagleaminhiseyes.Hewas infullArmanituxedoandbluetie.Hehadhishaircuttoabouthisearsanditwaslooseand wavy.Therewerediamondsinhisearsandprideinhissmile.Mybeautifulman.Ismiledbackat him. TheguysweredressedinfullRangerdressgreenswiththeirmedalsonthelapels,braidsand sasharoundthewaistandwhiteglovesatattentionanddroolworthyhandsome.Mygirlshad pickedtheirowndressesandevenLulahadchosensomethingbothbeautifulandappropriate. TheyhadcoordinatedtogetherandwerewearingdifferentcolorsofbluebecauseRangerlikes blue.Hehadpaidforeverything. MyDadkissedmeandplacedmyhandinRanger's.Helookedatmeandwhispered,"So beautifulBabe."IgazedathimasmyattentionwasturnedtoaGordoninfullarmydress chaplaingreensashemovedinfrontofus."What?Gordon?" Hewhispered,"Iunitedlotsofmyboysbeforetheywenttowarmissy.Thesewordswere preparedwithyouinmind."Heblessedusandthenhelookedatmeandsmiled. "WarislikefireLoveburnslikefire InWar,LaydownyourarmsortheycanbeusedagainstyouInlove,mayyourarmsbeused toprotectandwarmthatwhichyouholddear Fightthewarswiftlyanddon'tallowtheenemytoturnthewarinhisfavorForgiveoftensoyour lovecontinuestogrow Forthevictor,capturethestate...Incapturingaheartyou'vewonagreatvictory Positionyourarmytodealwithquickandchangingconditons...Inamarriagebepreparedfor goodtimesandbad Planyourmovesinacontrolledenvironment...Mayyourhomebeblessedandhappy ThensavoryourvictoryandthankGodthatyoulivetofightanotherdayMayyourunionnotbe enteredintolightlybutwithfaithandhonorandlove..." StephanieandCarlosyoumayexchangerings."Rangerplacedaplatinumanddiamondband onmyfingerandIplacedamatchingbandonhis.ThenGordonaskedustorepeatthewordsto oneanotherthatwouldsealusasmanandwife. "CarlosandStephanieyouarenowmanandwife.Youhavebothclaimedvictoryonthisspecial day.MayGodblessyou.Carloskissthiswomananddeclareherfinallyyours."

Rangergrinnedanddidexactlythat.Hebentmeoverandkissedtheshitoutofme.Mytiara almostfloppedonthefloor.WhenheraisedmebackupIwasflushedanddizzyandavery happywoman.Everyoneclappedaswemadeourwaytothesalonwheredinnerwouldtake place.Wewereembracedbyeveryonebeforesittingdowntoourcajunweddingdinnerof seafoodgumboorcreoleonionsoup,tossedgreensalad,chickenesplanadeorshrimpscarlet withandouille. Mygorgeoushusbandheldmyhandandkissedmeinbetweenbites.Ohjoy,thespoilsofwar... TBC Chapter17 WecutthebeautifulweddingcakewiththemaleandfemalesuperherosontopthatLulaand Conniehadfound.Wedidn'tmakeamessofeachother,butRangerdiddoticingonmynose andchinandkisseditoff. Thepatiodoorswereopenandthejazzbandplayedthroughdinner.Tablesandchairshadbeen setupoutsideandachampagnefountainwasflowing.Tankstoppedthebandandgot everyone'sattentiontomakeatoast. "CarlosandStephanieitisaboutdamntime.Youtwoarethemostexasperating,stubborn, ornerycouplethateverlovedeachotherandrefusedtoacceptit.Youbothdroveyourfriends crazy.Nowthatyou'vefinallycometoyoursenses,weallwanttowishyoumanyhappyyears together.Cheers!" Lularanupandgrabbedthemicrophone,"IsecondthatshitandIwanttoaddthatifanybody hereneedshelpnailingdowntheirmanorwomanI'mavailable.IgotthebookandIgotGordy andwegottheplan.IhelpedmygirlwintheBatmanwarandIcanhelpyoutoo.Gordy,weneed toputthatinyourphonebookadandweneedoneofthemwebpagestoo.Somethinglike'How tocaptureyourmate'callLulaandGordy"Gordonwalkedupandsnatchedthemicrophone fromherandannouncedthatthebrideandgroomwouldhavetheirfirstdancetogether. Rangergrinnedatmeandtookmeinhisarms."Soyouhadabattleplantogetyourman?"I turnedred. "DamnLula,yeah." "Sothat'swhyTheArtofWarbookwasinyourcarandthereasonforthevowsGordon prepared." "Yep." "Whendidyouhatchthatplan?" "Thedayafterthedeal." Heraisedaneyebrow."Really?" "IknewIwantedyouthenbutIknewyouwouldn'tbeaneasycatch.Thebattlewashardashell andyoumademeretreatacoupleoftimes." "Babe,I'mgladyoudidn'tgiveuponmeandI'mhappyIgotasecondchance.IlovedyouandI almostlostyou.I'mgoingtospendagooddealoftimemakingituptoyou,startingtonight."That gotanotherblush. "Carlos,Iloveyou.You'rereallymyhusbandnow." "Yes,andyou'remywifeandIadoreyouamante."HekissedmeasGordonannouncedthe

fatheranddaughterdance. Allthetraditionaldanceshadtakenplaceandeveryonehadcometothedancefloor.Ispied GordyandConniegettingalittlecloseandwinkedathimandgavehimathumbsupwhenhe lookedmyway.Herolledhiseyesatme. Afteraboutanhour,Tankannounceditwastimetothrowthebouquetandgarter.Thegirlsall linedupandIturnedandpitchedbackwards.Therewasascuffleandagrowlandaloudcryof painandupstoodmyGrandmaMazurwithherhairstandingupandherdresstwistedwithmy bouquet.Lulahadherhandsonherhips.Shelookedalittledisheveledandcrazyeyedherself. "YourGrannypinchedmewiththemdamnboneyfingerstomakemeletgo.Thatwasmine!"I turnedandlookedatmymotherwhowassupposedtobekeepinganeyeonher.Wellthiswas goingtobeinterestingnow. AsitturnedoutBobby,Tank,andMarcogotsomerevengeonLester,whohadbeengivingthem shitalldayaboutbeinggropedbyGrandma.Rangertookthegarteroffmylegtakingsomeextra timewithhishandundermydressandthenkissingmyfootbeforeputtingmyshoebackon.The guyslinedupwithgrimfacesandwhenRangerlaunchedthatgarter,itlandedrightononeof Lester'smedalsanddangledthere.Hecouldn'tevenshakeitoff. TankwasthefirsttograbachairandsitGrandmadowninitsoLestercouldrunthatgarterup herlittlechickenleg.ShehikedherdressallthewayupalmosttoherwellIdidn'twanttothink abouttheviewthatpoorLesterhadtheredownonhiskneesandshewinkedathim.Theguys' snickersstartedbeforeheeventouchedher.Heglaredatthemandgulpedandthengrabbed herfootandclosedhiseyesandlaunchedthatgarteruphertoherkneefastandwhenhewent toletgo,shegrabbedhishandandyankeditandthegarteruphigher.Hesnatchedhishand backlikeithadbeenburned. Bythentheguyswerealloutbentoverholdingtheirstomachsandhooting.Lesterstoodupand huffedovertomeandCarlosspoutingastringofwhatIknowwereSpanishcursewordsand growled,"Imaybescarred!Somebodyforgottoremindyourlocolaabuelitatowearher pantaloons(bloomers)onyourweddingday!IthinkI'mgoingblind!Imaynotevergetthat pictureoutofmyheadandmygirlfriendisgoingtobreakupwithmebecauseIwillprobably neverbeabletogetanerectionagain!"Andthatjustmadeuslaughevenharder.Behindme,my mothergaspedinhorror. ThatnightwhenmyhusbandandIretiredtooursuite,heslowlyremovedthebeautifulwedding dressthathehadboughtformeashekissedandlickedmylipsandmyneckandmy collarbone.Hesatdownonthebedandpulledmeintohislap. "Stephanie,you'vebeenholdingbackfrommeandyourselfformonths.You'remywifenowand Iloveyou.Youcanletgo.IfGregreallylovedyou,hewouldwantyoutogoonandbehappy. That'swhatIwouldwantifanythingeverhappenedtome.Youstillhaven'tletyourselffeellike youdidbeforeandyouneedtolettheguiltgoforgood.Youlovedhim,youwerefaithful,andyou grievedandhonoredhispassing.Pleaseletitgoforyouandusandourfuture.Iwanttomake lovetomywifeandIwantallofyou.Iwantmind,body,andsoulwithmetonight." IlookedinhisbeautifuleyesandIsawthelovethereandIrememberedthewordsofthe ceremonyaboutforgivenessandgoodtimesandbad.Itwastimetoletgoandbehappy.I shouldn'tfeelguiltinlovingthemanthatwasmytruesoulmate.Wehadabondanda connectionfromthefirsttimethatwehadmetandwhenwehadmadelove,thebondhadbeen

sealed.Wewerejusttoostubborntorecognizethatitwasdonethatourfuturehadbeen written. Ikissedhimandpulledhistieoffandhisjacketandthenslowlyunbuttonedhisshirt.AsIworked, hepepperedlightkissesonmyfaceandneckagain.IstoodupwhenIgottohispants.Ilooked athimandsaid,"Fromtonighton,I'myoursandyou'retheonlymanthatIwilleverlovelikethis.I wantorgasmsandpleasemakeitmultiplesbecauseI'mbehindmaybeahundredormore."He gavemeawolfgrin."MypleasureMrs.Manoso.Thathappenstobemyspecialtyandmynew job."Heputhissoftlipstomineandbegantounhookmycorset. Atbreakfastthenextmorning,Lulacameovertomeandhuggedme."Wellgirl,thatguythat wrotethatwarbooksurewasagenius.Yousuredidwinthewarandyoufinallygotyourman." "Lula,IgotmymanandmorethanIeverdreamed.Hooah!" `````````````````````````````````THEEND```````````````````````````````

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